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🎲 Surprise Me

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Shows like "Terrance and Phillip"
phillipshowsterrance
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- Exactly. It doesn't matter. It's fun. - We're not gonna care...
carefunmatter
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I intend to kick down a lot of doors today, Ingrid.
doorsingridintendkicktoday
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[groans]
groans
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OKAY, OKAY, YOU CAN STOP SAYING IT.
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Cow Days is when we all get together to celebrate
celebratedays
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Did you g-- Did you get a bad one?
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Here, go get it. Go get it.
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You and I, we could've run this town,
couldvetown
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I was the only employee who stuck with you.
employeestuck
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It's a great idea.
idea
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This guy started this death tour,
deathstartedtour
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No. Christ. Just don't fucking say another word.
anotheranother-wordchristfuckingword
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- Mmm. - Guys, I'm gonna provide...
provide
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SCIENCE.
science
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-Weiss. -Weiss?
weiss
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I think they want you to fairy dance around our letterbox.
dancefairy
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YOUR HOOK SHOT KNOCKED YOU UNCONSCIOUS,
hookknockedshotunconscious
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because it's the only way she knows how to talk.
knows
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Eric, the truth is, I don't think you'd
erictruth
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Oh, you're burning them. You're burning them!
burning
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-Don't you wanna hear my side of the story with your sex buddy?
buddysidestory
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BUT THEN HE MET MY MOM AND IT ALL FELL APART.
apartfellfell-apart
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Hair so black it absorbed the light, you know?
absorbedblackhairlight
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(BRITISH ACCENT) I'LL EXPLAIN LATER.
accentbritishbritish-accentexplain
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Hey there! Aw, well, thank you, thank you.
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Jordan, here's the plan: I'm gonna cram an entire evening's worth of drinking
cramdrinkingentireeveningsjordanplanworth
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- Hey, babe? You're up. - Hmm.
babe
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Hollywood stars Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul are here
aaronbryanhollywoodpaulstars
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It's going to be insane.
insane
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We have to assume she's everywhere.
assume
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All states have more than one city.
citystates
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More importantly, I'm the RA, which stands for Resident Advisor,
advisorimportantlyresidentstands
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Two days ago I strangled a woman to death just with my hands.
daysdeathhandswoman
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Gwart, do you remember how I-I told you
remember
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[Lois] It all began in the land of Mordor
beganlandloismordor
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I'll tell everybody. You find Carla. Dr Cox...
carlaeverybody
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This got me thinking, right? So, at some point today,
pointthinkingtoday
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a swallow needs to beat its wings 43 times every second, right?
beatneedssecondswallowtimeswings
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[chuckles] Yeah. Yeah.
chuckles
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No one else does.
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- Yeah! -Yahh!
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This is bizarre.
bizarre
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They say we can't shoot certain animals anymore
animalsanymorecertainshoot
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making a fool of yourself,
fool
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I have my moods.
moods
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by the mayor of Goldbriar, North Carolina.
carolinamayornorth
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[all laugh]
laugh