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Home » Seinfeld » S08E17 — The English Patient

Seinfeld

Season 8, Episode 17 — The English Patient

↓

You know at the movies they show

movies

↓

that little ad for the concession stand?

stand

↓

Where the cartoon candy's dancing,

cartoon dancing

↓

and the Milk Dud's playing the banjo?

banjo duds milk playing

↓

Oh, he's wailing on that banjo. Yeah.

banjo wailing

↓

I just don't understand the Raisinets.

↓

The sax player? Yeah.

player

↓

Yeah. The box of Raisinets runs up to the concession stand,

runs stand

↓

buys another box of Raisinets.

another buys

↓

So?

↓

Box of Raisinets eating another box of Raisinets?

another eating

↓

It's perverse.

↓

No. He's not gonna eat them.

↓

He's buying them for his Pepsi girlfriend.

buying girlfriend pepsi

↓

And why is he dating a Pepsi?

dating pepsi

↓

They're not having children.

children having

↓

They're musicians.

↓

Musicians.

↓

Get a real job.

real

↓

What do you want?

↓

Oh, I've had everything on the menu.

menu

↓

Uh...

↓

surprise me.

surprise

↓

Neil. Neil.

neil

↓

Oh. I am sorry.

↓

I am supposed to meet my boyfriend here.

boyfriend meet supposed

↓

He looks just like you.

↓

Really.

↓

Yeah.

↓

Like me? Uh-huh. Sorry.

↓

He-he.

↓

Like me?

↓

But how?

↓

Here's your halibut omelet.

omelet

↓

Surprised?

surprised

↓

Yes. Yes, I am.

↓

Look what I got for you for your Florida trip.

florida trip

↓

Crazy Shirts was closing them out.

closing crazy shirts

↓

I got a dozen for a buck.

buck dozen

↓

I saved a fortune. Look at that.

fortune saved

↓

There you go.

↓

Oh.

↓

"Number-one dad." Yeah.

number

↓

Ooh, and it's a medium. Perfect.

medium perfect

↓

Hey. Hey.

↓

You ready?

ready

↓

Almost. Okay, so look, uh,

↓

when you're in Florida, can my cigar guy

cigar florida

↓

drop off some Cubans for me at your parents'?

cubans drop parents

↓

I'm helping my parents move into their new condo.

condo helping parents

↓

I'm gonna be busy.

busy

↓

Oh, come on, man. Help a brother out.

brother

↓

All right.

↓

Yeah. I owe you one.

↓

We're even.

↓

Hey, Jerry... figure this out.

figure jerry

↓

I'm in the coffee shop,

coffee coffee-shop shop

↓

and this beautiful girl I could never even talk to

girl

↓

mistakes me for her boyfriend.

boyfriend mistakes

↓

That's a nice four seconds.

four four-seconds seconds

↓

I look just like him.

↓

I, me... this.

↓

This is what her boyfriend looks like.

boyfriend

↓

How is that possible?

possible

↓

Maybe he has money.

money

↓

Maybe he doesn't.

↓

Maybe he and I are exactly the same,

↓

except for one minor, yet crucial, detail.

crucial detail except minor

↓

You never know.

↓

Sometimes you do.

sometimes

↓

Maybe it's some... Some small thing I could change.

change

↓

Like a mustache or, uh...

mustache

↓

wearing a top hat.

wearing

↓

Or a monocle.

↓

Or a... Or a cane.

cane

↓

Who's she dating? Mr. Peanut?

dating peanut

↓

You could do a lot worse than Mr. Peanut, my friend.

friend peanut worse

↓

So, what do you wanna see?

↓

How about Sack Lunch?

lunch sack sack-lunch

↓

How about The English Patient?

english english-patient patient

↓

It's up for all those Oscars.

↓

Oh, Come on, Blaine. I mean,

blaine

↓

look at the poster for Sack Lunch.

lunch poster sack sack-lunch

↓

It's a family in a brown paper bag.

brown family paper

↓

Don't you wanna know how they got in there?

↓

No.

↓

Oh. Sold out.

sold

↓

Oh. Uh, two for The English Patient.

english english-patient patient

↓

So do you think they got shrunk down,

↓

or is it just a giant sack?

giant sack

↓

Uh, hi. Um, remember me?

remember

↓

I-I... I'm the guy that looks like Neil.

neil

↓

Hi. Hi.

↓

Ahem.

ahem

↓

Is Neil here?

neil

↓

Oh, no. He got held up at work.

held

↓

Oh, that's too bad.

↓

I... I kinda wanted to meet him, seeing as we look so similar.

kinda meet seeing similar wanted

↓

Huh. Well, you know, you don't look that much like him.

↓

Oh.

↓

Of course not.

course

↓

No, you're a little taller.

taller

↓

You look like you're in better shape than Neil.

neil shape

↓

Do you work out?

↓

Listen, I... I'm...

↓

I-I don't mean to seem forward,

forward

↓

but is... Is there any way that I could possibly

possibly

↓

have Neil's phone number?

number phone phone-number

↓

What is everyone talking about?

↓

"The English Patient, it's so romantic"?

english english-patient patient romantic

↓

God, that movie stunk.

movie stunk

↓

I kinda liked it.

kinda liked

↓

No, you didn't.

↓

Elaine, Blaine.

blaine elaine

↓

Did you just see The English Patient?

english english-patient patient

↓

Didn't you love it?

love

↓

No.

↓

How could you not love that movie?

love movie

↓

How about, it sucked.

sucked

↓

That Ralph Fiennes.

ralph

↓

I would give up my firstborn for him.

firstborn

↓

Uh. He's getting the short end of that stick.

short stick

↓

Jerry, this is Del Boca Vista's

jerry

↓

new physical fitness room.

fitness physical room

↓

They got medicine balls.

balls medicine

↓

You can bike ride. Anything you want.

bike bike-ride ride

↓

StairMaster? What?

↓

Nothing.

↓

See what I'm wearing?

wearing

↓

Oh. Did you get that out of my bag?

↓

No. Your mother found it.

found mother

↓

Son... this is the most wonderful

↓

and thoughtful thing you've ever done for me.

thoughtful

↓

You know, I bought you a Cadillac.

bought cadillac

↓

Twice.

twice

↓

Oh. Here he is.

↓

This is the man I wanted you to see.

wanted

↓

- Izzy Mandelbaum. - Hey there.

izzy mandelbaum

↓

He's 80 years old, but strong as an ox.

strong years

↓

Watch this.

watch

↓

See that? You couldn't do that.

↓

I could. I choose not to.

choose

↓

Hey, Morty. Who's this?

morty

↓

This is my son, Jerry, from New York.

jerry york

↓

He thinks he can lift more than Izzy.

izzy lift thinks

↓

I-I didn't say that.

↓

Hey, Izzy.

izzy

↓

This kid says he can lift more than you can.

lift

↓

Hey, your kid's pretty funny, Morty.

funny kids morty

↓

He should be a comedian.

comedian

↓

Actually, I am a comedian.

comedian

↓

That's not so funny.

funny

↓

You think you're better than me, huh?

↓

Izzy used to work out with Charles Atlas in the '50s.

atlas charles izzy used

↓

1850s?

↓

Well, that's it.

↓

It's go time.

↓

Let's see you lift that.

lift

↓

Mr. Mandelbaum... Come on, come on.

mandelbaum

↓

Pump it.

pump

↓

All right.

↓

Eh. Wrong attitude.

attitude

↓

You're not bringing that trash

bringing trash

↓

into my house.

house

↓

There. All right?

↓

Step aside, string bean.

aside bean step step-aside string

↓

I'll show you.

↓

I'm gonna take it up a notch.

notch

↓

Uh. My back.

↓

Somebody call an ambulance.

ambulance somebody

↓

There's already an ambulance here

ambulance

↓

for Mrs. Glickman.

↓

There's room for one more.

room

↓

Hey. One for Sack Lunch.

lunch sack sack-lunch

↓

It's good, right?

↓

Yeah. Good.

↓

Hey, what are you guys doing here?

↓

We just saw The English Patient again.

english english-patient patient

↓

It's even better the second time.

second

↓

They make it longer?

longer

↓

Forgot my umbrella.

forgot umbrella

↓

Blaine. Elaine.

blaine elaine

↓

You said you were busy tonight.

busy tonight

↓

Well, to tell you the truth, Elaine...

elaine truth

↓

I don't know if I can be with someone

↓

who doesn't like The English Patient.

english english-patient patient

↓

It's just a stupid movie.

movie stupid

↓

That's what I'm talking about.

↓

Come on, Blaine.

blaine

↓

Let's go.

↓

Enjoy Sack Lunch.

enjoy lunch sack sack-lunch

↓

I will.

↓

How could you do that to Mr. Mandelbaum?

mandelbaum

↓

You should be ashamed of yourself.

ashamed

↓

He egged me on.

↓

You should be more mature.

mature

↓

He's 80.

↓

Okay. Tomorrow Jerry and I

jerry tomorrow

↓

will visit Izzy and apologize.

apologize izzy visit

↓

Now, good night.

night

↓

You're not sleeping in that shirt.

shirt sleeping

↓

It's too tight.

tight

↓

This shirt will never leave my body.

body shirt

↓

Good night.

night

↓

All right, 7:30, got the place to myself.

place

↓

Jerry Seinfeld, please.

jerry

↓

Oh, you must be Kramer's guys. Come on in.

must

↓

You got the cigars?

cigars

↓

What cigars?

cigars

↓

Kramer said to bring him back some Cubans.

bring cubans kramer

↓

We are the Cubans.

cubans

↓

Yeah, hello. Jerry's place.

place

↓

They're real Cubans?

cubans real real-cubans

↓

They're human beings from Cuba?

beings human human-beings

↓

I said Cubans.

cubans

↓

What did you think I meant?

meant

↓

Cigars!

cigars

↓

Jerry, Cuban cigars are illegal in this country.

cigars country cuban illegal jerry

↓

That's why I got these guys.

↓

You're making your own cigars now?

cigars

↓

Yeah, yeah. I got investors all lined up.

investors lined

↓

Hold on a second. Hi, Dad.

second

↓

Who are they?

↓

They're Cuban cigar rollers.

cigar cuban

↓

Don't tell your mother.

mother

↓

What is that bubbling sound?

bubbling sound

↓

Are you making your tomato sauce?

sauce tomato

↓

Yeah, hot and spicy.

spicy

↓

You're not wearing a shirt, are you?

shirt wearing

↓

Yes, I am.

↓

What color is it?

color

↓

Oh.

↓

Damn it.

↓

You know, you... You could have

↓

just given me Neil's number.

given number

↓

You... You didn't have to take me out to dinner.

dinner

↓

I wanted to give it to you in person.

person wanted

↓

Oh. You know, I don't have to

↓

be up in the morning,

morning

↓

and I know a great breakfast place

breakfast place

↓

right around the corner.

corner

↓

Does Neil like to eat a big breakfast?

breakfast neil

↓

Why don't you come in?

↓

We'll talk about it.

↓

I really should get going.

↓

I... I wanna be home in case Neil calls.

calls case home neil

↓

Well...

↓

good night.

night

↓

I'll see you.

↓

Rough night?

night rough

↓

Ugh. You wouldn't believe it.

believe

↓

My boyfriend dumped me. Ugh.

boyfriend dumped

↓

My friends, who I don't even like,

friends

↓

they won't talk to me, all because I don't like

↓

that stupid English Patient movie.

english english-patient movie patient stupid

↓

Really? I thought it was pretty good.

↓

Oh, come on.

↓

Good? What was good about it?

↓

Those sex scenes.

scenes

↓

I mean, please.

↓

Give me something I can use.

↓

Well, I liked it.

liked

↓

Hey.

↓

You f... You forgot about my piece of pie.

forgot piece

↓

Hello?

↓

You know, sex in a tub...

↓

that doesn't work.

↓

This is quite a condo.

condo

↓

The Mandelbaums own the Magic Pan restaurants.

magic restaurants

↓

The crepe place?

crepe place

↓

Yeah. This is all big crepe money.

crepe money

↓

There's crepe money?

crepe money

↓

What are you doing here?

↓

Oh, Mr. Mandelbaum, I wanted to come by

mandelbaum wanted

↓

tell you how sorry I was that you hurt yourself.

hurt

↓

What the hell is that?

↓

What? That shirt.

shirt

↓

You think that you are the number-one dad?

number

↓

This was a gift from my son.

gift

↓

Oh, I see how it works now.

works

↓

He knocks me out of commission...

commission knocks

↓

so you can strut around in your fancy number-one shirt.

fancy number shirt

↓

Well, I'll show you who's number one.

number

↓

Mr. Mandelbaum, please.

mandelbaum

↓

It's go time.

↓

My back. I can't move.

↓

Call an ambulance.

ambulance

↓

I think I saw one a couple doors down.

couple doors

↓

So she wanted you to come up,

wanted

↓

but you left because you thought

left

↓

some guy might be calling you?

calling might

↓

Some guy. Some guy?

↓

Neil.

neil

↓

I have got to find out how

↓

he could get a girl like Danielle.

danielle girl

↓

George, you've got Danielle.

danielle george

↓

Forget about Neil.

forget neil

↓

You've "out-Neiled" him.

↓

So I'm Neil.

neil

↓

How did I do that?

↓

I don't know, but you better keep it up.

↓

I'm gonna go meet Danielle.

danielle meet

↓

There's a new Neil in town. Ha-ha.

neil town

↓

Try take a vacation.

vacation

↓

I come back, the whole operation's in shambles.

operations whole

↓

Hello.

↓

Hey, Jerry. Number one here.

jerry number

↓

Did you go see Izzy at the back specialist?

izzy

↓

I will. I just walked in the door.

door walked

↓

You have to go see him. Ma.

↓

Helen, will you stop bothering him?

bothering helen

↓

Jerry, that shirt has gone right to his head.

gone head jerry shirt

↓

Number one, signing off.

number signing

↓

Jerry...

jerry

↓

I just picked up the Cubans at the bus station.

cubans picked station

↓

What's going on?

↓

What? They're not real Cubans.

cubans real real-cubans

↓

They're Dominicans.

dominicans

↓

So?

↓

So, Jerry, if my investors

investors jerry

↓

don't get Cubans, the whole deal's off.

cubans deals whole

↓

What's the difference?

difference

↓

Jerry, once you've had real Cubans,

cubans jerry real real-cubans

↓

there's just nothing else like it.

↓

We're talking about people, right?

↓

Yes. Yes. The quality, the texture,

quality texture

↓

the intoxicating aroma.

aroma

↓

These guys don't have it.

↓

I thought they smelled pretty nice.

smelled

↓

Jerry, your palate's unrefined.

jerry

↓

Is not. Is too.

↓

Is not. Is too.

↓

I'm not having this conversation.

conversation having

↓

Are too. Am not.

↓

Another productive meeting.

another meeting productive

↓

By the way, I saw that English Patient

english english-patient patient

↓

film last night.

film night

↓

It was extraordinary.

extraordinary

↓

Oh, yes. It was so romantic.

romantic

↓

It ravished me.

↓

Elaine, what did you think?

elaine

↓

Well, uh, act...

↓

Actually I haven't seen it,

seen

↓

so...

↓

I couldn't tell you whether I...

whether

↓

liked it,

liked

↓

or whether it really sucked.

sucked whether

↓

You haven't seen it? No.

seen

↓

That's it. Drop everything. We're going right now.

drop

↓

Again, Mr. Mandelbaum,

mandelbaum

↓

this back specialist is supposed to be the best.

best supposed

↓

If there's anything else I can do,

↓

don't hesitate to, uh, try and find my number.

hesitate number

↓

Uh... Oh, wait.

↓

How about that, huh?

↓

The "World's Greatest Dad."

greatest worlds worlds-greatest

↓

My son made it for me.

↓

That's very nice.

↓

The best in the world.

best world

↓

Which means I'm better than just number one.

number

↓

Well, I don't know how official

official

↓

any of these rankings really are.

rankings

↓

Hi, Son. Hi, Daddy.

daddy

↓

This is your son?

↓

I got married in high school.

married school

↓

Hey, who are you?

↓

This is Seinfeld's kid.

↓

Oh, you think you're tough,

tough

↓

picking on an old man?

picking

↓

Maybe you'd like to try taking on

↓

somebody your own age.

somebody

↓

Hm. You got any kids?

kids

↓

Oh, you think you're better than me?

↓

Go ahead. Pick out anything in the room here.

ahead go-ahead pick room

↓

I'll lift it up over my head.

head lift

↓

Look. No one is lifting anything.

lifting

↓

The television.

television

↓

Mm.

↓

This one's for you, Pop.

ones

↓

It's go time.

↓

Oh. My back!

↓

Call an ambulance!

ambulance

↓

We're already in a hospital.

hospital

↓

All right, partner. Let's get down to business.

business partner

↓

Okay. Well, I'll, uh... I'll get the Cubans. All right.

cubans

↓

They're right out here.

↓

Yeah, here they are. They're Cubans.

cubans

↓

Real Cubans.

cubans real real-cubans

↓

You wouldn't be trying to sell old Earl Haffler

earl sell

↓

Dominicans in a Cuban wrapper, now, would you?

cuban dominicans wrapper

↓

Oh, come on. Look at these boys.

boys

↓

If they were any more Cuban,

cuban

↓

Castro would have smoked them himself.

smoked

↓

We're talking about people, right?

↓

I think so.

↓

I thought he quit smoking cigars.

cigars quit quit-smoking smoking

↓

Well, yeah. Yeah. But they also rolled

rolled

↓

for his brother...

brother

↓

uh, Dennis.

dennis

↓

Dennis Castro?

dennis

↓

Uh... Uh, Dwayne.

dwayne

↓

Get the hell out of my office.

office

↓

What?!

↓

You know, Neil called me today.

called neil today

↓

Really?

↓

Yeah, he's pretty upset

upset

↓

I broke up with him to go out with you.

broke

↓

Well, I guess I showed Neil who's Neil.

neil showed

↓

He wanted to get together tomorrow and have coffee.

coffee tomorrow wanted

↓

Coffee?

coffee

↓

I can beat that. Move in with me.

beat

↓

What?

↓

It beats the hell out of coffee.

beats coffee

↓

And I thought I knew what love was.

love

↓

Yep.

↓

You asked her to move in with you?

asked

↓

I gotta stay one step ahead of Neil.

ahead neil step step-ahead

↓

What if it's Neil Armstrong?

armstrong neil

↓

Then I'm going to Mars.

mars

↓

What if it's Neil Diamond?

diamond neil neil-diamond

↓

Oh, shut up, Jerry. Just shut up.

jerry

↓

All right, I gotta go back to the hospital.

hospital

↓

What? To see the old guy?

↓

No, I got into a thing with the son,

↓

and now he's laid up too.

laid

↓

How old's the son?

olds

↓

I think he's the same age as the father.

father

↓

What is with this family?

family

↓

Don't know. It's like, if one of them dies,

dies

↓

the other one wants to bench-press the casket.

bench casket press wants

↓

Hey, Jerry.

jerry

↓

You cold?

cold

↓

No.

↓

It's them, right?

↓

Something wrong your chin?

chin

↓

There. Where?

↓

No, no, no. Don't look. Don't look.

↓

Over there. The Dominicans.

dominicans

↓

Aren't they supposed to be rolling cigars?

cigars rolling supposed

↓

Well, it didn't quite work out,

↓

and now I've got nothing for them to do.

↓

So?

↓

So I taught 'em all about Cuba,

taught

↓

and they really took to it.

↓

You know, Marxism, the workers' revolution,

revolution workers

↓

the clothing.

clothing

↓

Boy, they seem pretty angry about something.

angry

↓

Yeah. I'm a little worried.

worried

↓

When there's no work and the people get restless,

restless

↓

who do you think they come after?

↓

El presidente.

↓

I swear to you, I didn't know

swear

↓

the TV was bolted to the table.

table

↓

I bet you pulled that trick

pulled trick

↓

on my daddy in Florida.

daddy florida

↓

He couldn't handle the weight.

handle weight

↓

Oh, so now you think you're better than me?

↓

You think you're better than him?

↓

Look, let me just state for the record,

record state

↓

I think you're both better than me.

↓

Okay.

↓

My boys.

boys

↓

My dad.

↓

My grandpa.

grandpa

↓

Oh, come on.

↓

What happened to him?

happened

↓

He was trying to lift the TV.

lift

↓

That TV?

↓

Oh, no.

↓

It's go time.

↓

Why didn't anybody tell me

anybody

↓

it was bolted down?

↓

Well, I still thought you could do it.

↓

Me too.

↓

Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum.

mandelbaum

↓

Fellas, fellas, fellas. Look, I gotta go.

fellas fellas-fellas

↓

Oh, yeah, that's right, go.

↓

Put us all in the hospital.

hospital

↓

And you ruined our business

business ruined

↓

with all your macho head games.

games head macho

↓

I didn't ruin your business.

business ruin

↓

Yes, you did.

↓

There's nobody there now at the Magic Pan

magic nobody

↓

to roll the crepes.

crepes roll

↓

We gotta close it up.

close

↓

Don't you hire people to do that?

hire

↓

Each crepe has to be

crepe

↓

hand-rolled by a Mandelbaum.

hand mandelbaum rolled

↓

That's what puts the magic in Magic Pan.

magic

↓

So you just need some guys that could roll them?

roll

↓

Yeah.

↓

I think I can help you out.

↓

I'll see you later.

↓

Hey. I can't see the TV.

↓

Here.

↓

You think you're better than us, don't you?

↓

Huh?

↓

Elaine, I hope you're watching the clothes

clothes elaine hope watching

↓

because I can't take my eyes off the passion.

eyes passion

↓

No.

↓

No, I... I can't do this anymore.

anymore

↓

I can't. It's too long.

↓

Quit telling your stupid story

quit story stupid telling

↓

about the stupid desert

desert stupid

↓

and just die already.

↓

Die!

↓

Shh!

↓

Elaine, you don't like the movie?

elaine movie

↓

I hate it!

hate

↓

Shh!

↓

Oh, go to hell!

↓

Well, why didn't you say so in the first place?

place

↓

You're fired.

fired

↓

Great. I'll wait for you outside.

↓

He was gonna fire you?

fire

↓

Well, the only way I could talk him out of it

↓

was that I agreed to go and visit the Tunisian desert.

agreed desert visit

↓

Tunisia?

↓

That's where they filmed the movie.

filmed movie

↓

It's supposed to inspire me.

inspire supposed

↓

Well, that doesn't sound so bad.

sound

↓

I have to live in a cave.

cave live

↓

Oh.

↓

These Dominicans really know

dominicans

↓

their way around a crepe, huh?

crepe

↓

Look at that.

↓

Looks like they're rolling a Double Corona.

double rolling

↓

Just a cigar made out of Bisquick, huh, Guillermo?

cigar

↓

I'm very happy with George.

george happy

↓

I'm sorry, Neil.

neil

↓

It's over.

↓

Come on, let's just eat our crepes.

crepes

↓

Ah! My face!

face

↓

Ooh!

↓

Ah! Neil!

neil

↓

What are they... Why are the crepes spraying?

crepes spraying

↓

Dominicans are rolling them too tight.

dominicans rolling tight

↓

Well. That's why you gotta get real Cubans.

cubans real real-cubans

↓

Danielle. Where's Neil?

danielle neil

↓

Is this him?

↓

Yeah.

↓

That blueberry crepe burned him pretty badly.

badly blueberry burned crepe

↓

Whose cane is this?

cane

↓

It's Neil's.

↓

Cane.

cane

↓

I knew it.

↓

So...

↓

we meet at last.

meet

↓

I admire your skills...

admire skills

↓

Mr. Peanut.

peanut

↓

Well, Danielle, uh, we should get going.

danielle

↓

I... I got a key made for you.

↓

George, I can't move in with you. What?

george

↓

I'm sorry. But I'm taking Neil to a clinic in England.

clinic england neil

↓

N-no. No. You can't leave me.

↓

Uh... Marry me.

marry

↓

I'll burn myself.

burn

↓

I'll burn my parents!

burn parents

↓

Sorry, George.

george

↓

George...

george

↓

I win.

↓

Ladies and gentlemen, in just one moment

gentlemen ladies moment

↓

we'll be showing our feature presentation...

feature presentation showing

↓

No, no, no, no, no.

↓

The comedy hit, Sack Lunch, starring Dabney Coleman.

coleman comedy dabney lunch sack sack-lunch starring

↓

All right. Oh, this is shaping up.

↓

Excuse me, please.

excuse

↓

Oh, sure.

↓

Oh.

↓

Ladies and gentlemen,

gentlemen ladies

↓

because we have been exploited

exploited

↓

by your Magic Pan crepe restaurants,

crepe magic restaurants

↓

we are hijacking this plane to Cuba.

plane

↓

Everyone stay in your seats.

seats

↓

And shut that movie off.

movie

↓

Oh, nuts.

nuts

↓

Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum.

mandelbaum