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Home » The Princess Bride » S01E01 — The Princess Bride

The Princess Bride

Season 1, Episode 1 — The Princess Bride

↓

Hi, honey.

honey

↓

Hi, Mom.

↓

You feeling any better?

feeling

↓

A little bit.

↓

Guess what.

↓

What?

↓

Grandfather's here.

grandfathers

↓

Mom, can't you tell him that I'm sick?

sick

↓

I hate that.

hate

↓

I'll leave you two pals alone.

alone pals

↓

I brought you a special present.

brought present special

↓

- What is it? - Open it up.

open

↓

- A book? - That's right.

book

↓

When I was your age, television was called books.

books called television

↓

This is a special book.

book special

↓

It was the book my father used to read to me when I was sick...

book father read sick used

↓

and I used to read it to your father.

father read used

↓

Today I'm going to read it to you.

read today

↓

Does it got any sports in it?

sports

↓

Are you kidding?

kidding

↓

Fencing, fighting, torture, revenge...

fighting revenge torture

↓

giants, monsters, chases...

monsters

↓

escapes, true love, miracles.

love miracles

↓

That doesn't sound too bad.

sound

↓

I'll try and stay awake.

awake

↓

Thank you very much. That's very nice of you.

↓

Your vote of confidence is overwhelming.

confidence overwhelming vote

↓

All right.

↓

"The Princess Bride...

bride princess

↓

"by S. Morgenstern.

↓

"Chapter One.

chapter

↓

"Buttercup was raised on a small farm...

buttercup farm raised

↓

"in the country of Florin.

country

↓

"Her favorite pastimes were riding her horse...

favorite horse riding

↓

"and tormenting the farm boy that worked there.

farm worked

↓

"His name was Westley, but she never called him that."

called name

↓

Isn't that a wonderful beginning?

beginning

↓

"Nothing gave Buttercup as much pleasure...

buttercup pleasure

↓

as ordering Westley around."

ordering

↓

Farm boy, polish my horse's saddle.

farm horses polish saddle

↓

As you wish.

wish

↓

Please.

↓

As you wish.

wish

↓

That day she was amazed to discover...

amazed discover

↓

what he meant was, "I love you."

love meant

↓

Even more amazing was the day she realized...

amazing realized

↓

she truly loved him back.

loved truly

↓

Farm boy.

farm

↓

Fetch me that pitcher.

fetch

↓

Hold it, hold it.

↓

What is this? Are you trying to trick me?

trick

↓

And where's the sports?

sports

↓

Wait. Just wait.

↓

When does it get good?

↓

I fear I'll never see you again.

fear

↓

Of course you will.

course

↓

What if something happens to you?

happens

↓

Hear this now...

↓

I will always come for you.

↓

But how can you be sure?

↓

This is true love.

love

↓

Do you think this happens every day?

happens

↓

Westley didn't reach his destination.

destination reach

↓

His ship was attacked by the Dread Pirate Roberts...

attacked pirate roberts ship

↓

who never left captives alive.

alive left

↓

When Buttercup got the news that Westley was murdered...

buttercup murdered news

↓

Murdered by pirates is good!

murdered pirates

↓

She went into her room and shut the door...

door room

↓

and for days she neither slept nor ate.

days slept

↓

I will never love again.

love

↓

Five years later, the main square of Florin City...

city five five-years main square years

↓

was filled as never before to hear the announcement...

announcement filled

↓

of the great Prince Humperdinck's bride-to-be.

bride prince

↓

My people...

↓

a month from now...

month

↓

our country will have its 500th anniversary.

anniversary country

↓

On that sundown, I shall marry a lady...

lady marry

↓

who was once a commoner like yourselves...

yourselves

↓

but perhaps you will not find her common now.

common perhaps

↓

Would you like to meet her?

meet

↓

My people, the princess Buttercup!

buttercup princess

↓

Buttercup's emptiness consumed her.

↓

Although the law of the land gave Humperdinck...

land

↓

the right to choose his bride...

bride choose

↓

she did not love him.

love

↓

Despite Humperdinck's reassurance...

despite

↓

that she would grow to love him...

grow love

↓

the only joy she found was in her daily ride.

daily found ride

↓

A word, my lady?

lady word

↓

We are but poor, lost circus performers.

circus lost poor

↓

Is there a village nearby?

nearby village

↓

There is nothing nearby, not for miles.

miles nearby

↓

Then there will be no one to hear you scream.

scream

↓

What is that you're ripping?

ripping

↓

It's fabric from the uniform of an army officer of Guilder.

army fabric officer uniform

↓

Who's Guilder?

↓

The country across the sea, the sworn enemy of Florin.

country enemy sworn

↓

Go!

↓

Once the horse reaches the castle...

castle horse reaches

↓

the fabric will make the prince suspect...

fabric prince suspect

↓

that the Guilderians have abducted his love.

abducted love

↓

When he finds her body dead on the Guilder frontier...

body dead finds

↓

his suspicions will be totally confirmed.

confirmed

↓

You never said anything about killing anyone.

killing

↓

I've hired you to help me start a war.

hired start

↓

It's a prestigious line of work...

line

↓

with a long and glorious tradition.

glorious tradition

↓

I just don't think it's right, killing an innocent girl.

girl innocent killing

↓

Am I going mad, or did the word "think" escape your lips?

escape lips word

↓

You were not hired for your brains...

brains hired

↓

you hippopotamic land mass!

land mass

↓

I agree with Fezzik.

agree

↓

The sot has spoken!

spoken

↓

What happens to her is not truly your concern!

concern happens truly

↓

I will kill her!

kill

↓

And remember this, never forget this...

forget remember

↓

When I found you, you were so slobbering drunk...

drunk found

↓

you couldn't buy brandy!

↓

And you... friendless, brainless...

↓

helpless, hopeless!

helpless hopeless

↓

Do you want me to send you back to where you were...

send

↓

unemployed in Greenland?

unemployed

↓

That Vizzini, he can... fuss.

fuss

↓

Fuss, fuss...

fuss

↓

I think he like to scream... at us.

scream

↓

Probably he means no... harm.

harm

↓

He's really very short on... charm.

charm short

↓

You have a great gift for rhyme.

gift rhyme

↓

Yes, yes, some of the time.

↓

Enough of that!

↓

Fezzik, are there rocks ahead?

ahead rocks

↓

If there are, we'll all be dead.

dead

↓

No more rhymes, now. I mean it!

rhymes

↓

Anybody want a peanut?

anybody peanut

↓

We'll reach the cliffs by dawn.

dawn reach

↓

Why are you doing that?

↓

Making sure nobody's following us.

following nobodys

↓

That would be inconceivable.

↓

Despite what you think...

despite

↓

you will be caught, and when you are...

caught

↓

the prince will see you all hanged.

prince

↓

Of all the necks on this boat, Highness...

boat highness necks

↓

the one you should be worrying about is your own.

worrying

↓

Stop doing that!

↓

We can all relax. It's almost over.

relax

↓

You are sure nobody's following us?

following nobodys

↓

As I told you, it would be absolutely, totally...

absolutely

↓

and in all other ways inconceivable!

ways

↓

No one in Guilder knows what we've done...

knows

↓

and no one in Florin could have gotten here so fast.

fast gotten

↓

Out of curiosity, why do you ask?

↓

I happened to look behind us, and something is there.

behind happened

↓

What?

↓

Probably some local fisherman...

fisherman local

↓

out for a pleasure cruise at night...

cruise night pleasure

↓

through eel-infested waters.

infested waters

↓

What?

↓

Go in! Get after her!

↓

I don't swim.

swim

↓

I only dog-paddle.

paddle

↓

Veer left!

left

↓

Left!

left

↓

Do you know what that sound is, Highness?

highness sound

↓

Those are the shrieking eels.

shrieking

↓

If you don't believe me, just wait.

believe

↓

They always grow louder...

grow louder

↓

when they're about to feed on human flesh.

feed flesh human

↓

If you swim back now...

swim

↓

I promise no harm will come to you.

harm promise

↓

I doubt you'll get such an offer from the eels.

doubt offer

↓

She doesn't get eaten by the eels at this time.

eaten

↓

What?

↓

The eel doesn't get her.

↓

I'm explaining to you because you look nervous.

explaining nervous

↓

I wasn't nervous.

nervous

↓

Maybe I was a little bit concerned...

concerned

↓

but that's not the same thing.

↓

Because we can stop now if you want.

↓

No. You could read a little bit more, if you want.

read

↓

"Do you know what that sound is, Highness?

highness sound

↓

"Those are the shrieking eels."

shrieking

↓

Pass that, Grandpa. You read it already.

grandpa pass read

↓

My goodness, I did.

goodness

↓

I'm sorry. Beg your pardon.

pardon

↓

All right, all right. Let's see.

↓

She was in the water, the eel was coming after her...

coming water

↓

she was frightened...

frightened

↓

the eel started to charge her, and then...

charge started

↓

Put her down. Just put her down!

↓

I think he's getting closer.

closer

↓

He's no concern of ours.

concern

↓

Sail on!

sail

↓

I suppose you think you're brave, don't you?

brave suppose

↓

Only compared to some.

compared

↓

Look! He's right on top of us!

↓

I wonder if he's using the same wind we are using.

using wind wonder

↓

Whoever he is, he's too late. See?

late

↓

The Cliffs of Insanity!

insanity

↓

Hurry up!

hurry

↓

Move the thing!

↓

And that other thing!

↓

Move it!

↓

We're safe.

safe

↓

Only Fezzik is strong enough to go up our way.

strong

↓

He'll have to sail for hours till he finds a harbor.

finds harbor hours sail till

↓

He's climbing the rope, and he's gaining on us!

climbing gaining rope

↓

Inconceivable!

↓

Faster!

faster

↓

I thought I was going faster.

faster

↓

You were supposed to be this colossus...

supposed

↓

you were this great legendary thing...

legendary

↓

and yet he gains!

↓

I'm carrying three people, and he got only himself.

carrying three

↓

I do not accept excuses. I have to find a new giant.

accept excuses giant

↓

Don't say that, Vizzini, please.

↓

Did I make it clear that your job is at stake?

clear stake

↓

He's got very good arms.

arms

↓

He didn't fall?

fall

↓

Inconceivable!

↓

You keep using that word.

using word

↓

I do not think it means what you think it means.

↓

My God, he's climbing.

climbing

↓

Whoever he is, he's obviously seen us with the princess...

obviously princess seen

↓

and must therefore die.

must therefore

↓

You carry her.

carry

↓

We'll head straight for the Guilder frontier.

head head-straight straight

↓

Catch up when he's dead.

catch dead

↓

If he falls, fine. If not, the sword.

falls sword

↓

I'm going to duel him left-handed.

handed left

↓

You know what a hurry we're in.

hurry

↓

It's the only way I can be satisfied.

satisfied

↓

If I use my right, tsk! Over too quickly.

quickly

↓

Have it your way!

↓

You be careful.

careful

↓

People in masks cannot be trusted.

cannot masks trusted

↓

I'm waiting!

waiting

↓

Hello there!

↓

Slow going?

slow

↓

I don't mean to be rude, but this is not as easy as it looks.

easy rude

↓

I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't distract me.

appreciate distract

↓

- Sorry. - Thank you.

↓

I do not suppose you could speed things up?

speed suppose

↓

If you're in such a hurry...

hurry

↓

you could lower a rope or a tree branch...

branch lower rope tree

↓

or find something useful to do.

useful

↓

I could do that. I got some rope up here...

rope

↓

but I do not think you would accept my help...

accept

↓

since I am only waiting around to kill you.

kill waiting

↓

That does put a damper on our relationship.

relationship

↓

But I promise I won't kill you until you reach the top.

kill promise reach

↓

That's very comforting, but I'm afraid you'll just have to wait.

afraid comforting

↓

I hate waiting.

hate waiting

↓

I could give you my word as a Spaniard.

word

↓

No good.

↓

I've known too many Spaniards.

known

↓

Any way you'll trust me?

trust

↓

Nothing comes to mind.

comes mind

↓

I swear on the soul of my father, Domingo Montoya...

domingo father soul swear

↓

you will reach the top alive.

alive reach

↓

Throw me the rope.

rope throw

↓

Thank you.

↓

Wait. We'll wait until you're ready.

ready

↓

Again, thank you.

↓

I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance...

chance

↓

happen to have six fingers on your right hand?

fingers hand happen

↓

Do you always begin conversations this way?

begin conversations

↓

My father was slaughtered by a six-fingered man.

father fingered slaughtered

↓

He was a great swordmaker, my father.

father

↓

When the six-fingered man appeared...

appeared fingered

↓

and request a special sword...

request special sword

↓

my father took the job.

father

↓

He slaved a year before he was done.

↓

I've never seen its equal.

equal seen

↓

The six-fingered man returned and demanded it...

fingered returned

↓

but at 1/10 his promised price.

price promised

↓

My father refused.

father refused

↓

Without a word...

word

↓

the six-fingered man slashed him through the heart.

fingered heart

↓

I loved my father.

father loved

↓

So naturally, I challenged his murderer to a duel.

challenged murderer naturally

↓

I failed.

failed

↓

The six-fingered man leave me alive...

alive fingered

↓

but he gave me this.

↓

How old were you?

↓

I was eleven years old.

eleven years

↓

When I was strong enough...

strong

↓

I dedicated my life to the study of fencing.

dedicated life study

↓

So the next time we meet, I will not fail.

fail meet

↓

I will go up to the six-fingered man and say...

fingered

↓

"Hello.

↓

"My name is Inigo Montoya.

name

↓

"You killed my father.

father killed

↓

"Prepare to die."

prepare

↓

You've done nothing but study swordplay?

study

↓

More pursuit than study lately.

lately study

↓

You see, I cannot find him.

cannot

↓

It's been twenty years now. I'm starting to lose confidence.

confidence lose starting twenty years

↓

I just work for Vizzini to pay the bills.

bills

↓

There's not a lot of money in revenge.

money revenge

↓

I certainly hope you find him someday.

certainly certainly-hope hope someday

↓

You're ready, then?

ready

↓

Whether I am or not, you've been more than fair.

fair whether

↓

You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.

decent fellow hate kill

↓

You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die.

decent fellow hate

↓

Begin.

begin

↓

You are using Bonetti's defense against me?

defense using

↓

I thought it fitting considering the rocky terrain.

considering fitting rocky

↓

Naturally. You must expect me to attack with Capo Ferro.

attack expect must naturally

↓

Naturally, but I find that Thibault cancels out Capo Ferro.

naturally

↓

Don't you?

↓

Unless the enemy has studied Agrippa.

enemy studied

↓

Which I have.

↓

You are wonderful!

↓

Thank you. I've worked hard to become so.

become hard worked worked-hard

↓

I admit it. You are better than I am.

admit

↓

Then why are you smiling?

smiling

↓

Because I know something you don't know.

↓

What is that?

↓

I am not left-handed.

handed left

↓

You're amazing.

amazing

↓

I ought to be, after twenty years.

ought twenty years

↓

There's something I ought to tell you.

ought

↓

Tell me.

↓

I'm not left-handed, either.

handed left

↓

Who are you?

↓

No one of consequence.

consequence

↓

I must know.

must

↓

Get used to disappointment.

disappointment used

↓

Kill me quickly.

kill quickly

↓

I would sooner destroy a stained-glass window...

destroy glass sooner stained window

↓

as an artist like yourself.

artist

↓

However, since I can't have you following me, either.

following

↓

Please understand, I hold you in the highest respect.

highest respect

↓

Inconceivable!

↓

Give her to me! Catch up with us quickly!

catch quickly

↓

What do I do?

↓

Finish him, finish him... your way!

finish

↓

Good, my way. Thank you, Vizzini.

↓

Which way's my way?

ways

↓

Pick up one of those rocks, get behind the boulder.

behind pick rocks

↓

In a few minutes...

minutes

↓

the man in black will come running around the bend.

bend black running

↓

The minute his head is in view, hit it with the rock!

head minute rock view

↓

My way is not very sportsmanlike.

↓

I did that on purpose.

purpose

↓

I didn't have to miss.

miss

↓

I believe you.

believe

↓

So what happens now?

happens

↓

We face each other as God intended.

face intended

↓

Sportsmanlike.

↓

No tricks, no weapons. Skill against skill alone.

alone skill tricks weapons

↓

You'll put down your rock, and I'll put down my sword...

rock sword

↓

and we'll try and kill each other like civilized people?

civilized kill

↓

I could kill you now.

kill

↓

Frankly, I think the odds...

frankly odds

↓

are slightly in your favor at hand-fighting.

favor fighting hand slightly

↓

It's not my fault being the biggest and the strongest.

biggest fault strongest

↓

I don't even exercise.

exercise

↓

Are you just fiddling around with me, or what?

↓

I want you to feel you are doing well.

↓

I hate for people to die embarrassed.

embarrassed hate

↓

You're quick!

quick

↓

Good thing, too!

↓

Why are you wearing a mask?

mask wearing

↓

Were you burned with acid or something like that?

acid burned

↓

No. It's just they're terribly comfortable.

comfortable terribly

↓

I think everyone will be wearing them in the future.

future wearing

↓

I just figured why you give me so much trouble.

figured trouble

↓

Why is that, do you think?

↓

I haven't fought just one person for so long.

fought person

↓

I've been specializing in groups.

groups

↓

Battling gangs for local charities...

battling gangs local

↓

that kind of thing.

↓

Why should that make such a... Oof! Difference?

difference

↓

Well, you see...

↓

you use different moves...

moves

↓

when you're fighting half a dozen people...

dozen fighting half

↓

than when you only...

↓

have to be worried about one.

worried

↓

I do not envy you the headache you will have when you awake.

awake envy headache

↓

But in the meantime, rest well and dream of large women.

dream meantime rest women

↓

There was...

↓

a mighty duel.

mighty

↓

It ranged all over.

↓

They were both masters.

masters

↓

Who won? How did it end?

↓

The loser ran off alone...

alone loser

↓

while the winner... followed those footprints toward Guilder.

followed winner

↓

Shall we track them both?

track

↓

The loser is nothing.

loser

↓

Only the princess matters.

matters princess

↓

Clearly, this was all planned by warriors of Guilder.

planned warriors

↓

We must all be ready for whatever lies ahead.

ahead lies must ready

↓

Could this be a trap?

trap

↓

I always think everything could be a trap.

trap

↓

That is why I'm still alive.

alive

↓

So, it is down to you, and it is down to me.

↓

If you wish her dead...

dead wish

↓

by all means, keep moving forward.

forward moving moving-forward

↓

Let me explain.

explain

↓

There's nothing to explain.

explain

↓

You're trying to kidnap what I've rightfully stolen.

kidnap stolen

↓

Perhaps... an arrangement can be reached.

arrangement perhaps reached

↓

There will be no arrangement, and you're killing her.

arrangement killing

↓

If there can be no arrangement, then we are at an impasse.

arrangement

↓

I'm afraid so.

afraid

↓

I can't compete with you physically...

compete physically

↓

and you're no match for my brains.

brains match

↓

You're that smart?

smart

↓

Let me put it this way...

↓

have you ever heard of Plato, Aristotle, Socrates?

heard

↓

- Yes. - Morons.

morons

↓

Really?

↓

In that case, I challenge you to a battle of wits.

battle case challenge wits

↓

For the princess?

princess

↓

To the death?

death

↓

I accept.

accept

↓

Good, then pour the wine.

pour wine

↓

Inhale this, but do not touch.

touch

↓

I smell nothing.

smell

↓

What you do not smell is called iocane powder.

called powder smell

↓

It is odorless, tasteless, dissolves instantly in liquid...

instantly liquid

↓

and is among the more deadly poisons known to man.

among deadly known

↓

All right. Where is the poison?

poison

↓

The battle of wits has begun.

battle begun wits

↓

It ends when you decide, and we both drink...

decide drink ends

↓

and find out who is right...

↓

and who is dead.

dead

↓

But it's so simple.

simple

↓

All I have to do is divine from what I know of you...

divine

↓

are you the sort of man...

↓

who would put the poison into his own goblet or his enemy's?

poison

↓

A clever man would put the poison...

clever poison

↓

into his own goblet...

↓

because he would know that only a great fool...

fool

↓

would reach for what he was given.

given reach

↓

I am not a great fool...

fool

↓

so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you.

choose front wine

↓

But you must have known I was not a great fool.

fool known must

↓

You would have counted on it...

counted

↓

so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.

choose front wine

↓

You've made your decision, then?

decision

↓

Not remotely...

remotely

↓

because iocane comes from Australia, as everyone knows...

australia comes knows

↓

and Australia is entirely peopled with criminals...

australia criminals entirely

↓

and criminals are used to having people not trust them...

criminals having trust used

↓

as you are not trusted by me...

trusted

↓

so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you.

choose front wine

↓

Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.

intellect truly

↓

Wait till I get going!

till

↓

- Where was I? - Australia.

australia

↓

Yes, Australia. You must have suspected...

australia must suspected

↓

I would have known the powder's origin...

known

↓

so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.

choose front wine

↓

You're just stalling now.

stalling

↓

You'd like to think that, wouldn't you?

↓

You've beaten my giant...

beaten giant

↓

which means you're exceptionally strong...

strong

↓

so you could have put the poison in your own goblet...

poison

↓

trusting on your strength to save you...

save strength trusting

↓

so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you.

choose front wine

↓

But you've also bested my Spaniard...

↓

which means you must have studied...

must studied

↓

and in studying, you must have learned that man is mortal...

learned must studying

↓

so you would have put the poison...

poison

↓

as far from yourself as possible...

possible

↓

so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.

choose front wine

↓

You're trying to trick me into giving away something.

giving trick

↓

It won't work.

↓

It has worked. You've given everything away.

given worked

↓

- I know where the poison is. - Then make your choice.

choice poison

↓

I will, and I choose... What in the world can that be?

choose world

↓

What? Where?

↓

I don't see anything.

↓

I could have sworn I saw something. No matter.

matter sworn

↓

What's so funny?

funny

↓

I'll tell you in a minute.

minute

↓

First, let's drink...

drink

↓

me from my glass and you from yours.

glass

↓

You guessed wrong.

guessed

↓

You only think I guessed wrong. That's what's so funny!

funny guessed

↓

I switched glasses when your back was turned!

glasses switched turned

↓

You fool!

fool

↓

You fell victim to one of the classic blunders.

classic fell victim

↓

The most famous is "Never get involved in a land war in Asia."

famous involved land

↓

But only slightly less well known is this...

known less slightly

↓

"Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!"

death line

↓

Who are you?

↓

I am no one to be trifled with.

↓

That is all you ever need know.

↓

And to think, all that time...

↓

it was your cup that was poisoned.

poisoned

↓

They were both poisoned.

poisoned

↓

I spent the last few years...

spent years

↓

building up an immunity to iocane powder.

building immunity powder

↓

Someone has beaten the giant.

beaten giant

↓

There will be great suffering in Guilder if she dies.

dies suffering

↓

Catch your breath.

breath catch

↓

If you'll release me...

release

↓

whatever you ask for ransom, you'll get it. I promise you.

promise ransom

↓

And what is that worth... the promise of a woman?

promise woman worth

↓

You're very funny, Highness.

funny highness

↓

I was giving you a chance.

chance giving

↓

It does not matter where you take me...

matter

↓

there is no greater hunter than Prince Humperdinck.

greater hunter prince

↓

He can track a falcon on a cloudy day.

falcon track

↓

He can find you.

↓

You think your dearest love will save you?

dearest love save

↓

I never said he was my dearest love.

dearest love

↓

And, yes, he will save me. That I know.

save

↓

You admit to me you do not love your fiancé.

admit love

↓

He knows I do not love him.

knows love

↓

Are not capable of love is what you mean.

capable love

↓

I have loved more deeply...

deeply loved

↓

than a killer like yourself could ever dream.

dream killer

↓

That was a warning, Highness.

highness warning

↓

The next time, my hand flies on its own.

flies hand

↓

Where I come from, there are penalties when a woman lies.

lies woman

↓

Iocane. I'd bet my life on it...

life

↓

and there are the princess' footprints.

princess

↓

She is alive, or was an hour ago.

alive hour

↓

If she is otherwise when I find her...

otherwise

↓

I shall be very put out.

↓

- Rest, Highness. - I know who you are.

highness rest

↓

Your cruelty reveals everything.

cruelty

↓

You're the Dread Pirate Roberts. Admit it.

admit pirate roberts

↓

With pride. What can I do for you?

pride

↓

You can die slowly, cut into a thousand pieces.

pieces slowly thousand

↓

Hardly complimentary, Your Highness.

complimentary hardly highness

↓

Why loose your venom on me?

loose

↓

You killed my love.

killed love

↓

It's possible.

possible

↓

I kill a lot of people.

kill

↓

Who was this love of yours?

love

↓

Another prince like this one... ugly, rich, and scabby?

another prince rich ugly

↓

A farm boy, poor.

farm poor

↓

Poor and perfect with eyes like the sea after a storm.

eyes perfect poor storm

↓

On the high seas, your ship attacked.

attacked seas ship

↓

And the Dread Pirate Roberts never takes prisoners.

pirate prisoners roberts takes

↓

I can't afford to make exceptions.

afford

↓

Once word leaks out that a pirate has gone soft...

gone pirate soft word

↓

people begin to disobey you...

begin

↓

and then it's nothing but work, work, work all the time.

↓

You mock my pain.

mock pain

↓

Life is pain, Highness.

highness life pain

↓

Anyone who says differently is selling something.

differently selling

↓

I remember this farm boy of yours, I think.

farm remember

↓

This would be, what, five years ago?

five five-years years

↓

Does it bother you to hear?

bother

↓

Nothing you can say will upset me.

upset

↓

He died well.

died

↓

That should please you.

↓

No bribe attempts or blubbering.

attempts bribe

↓

He simply said, "Please...

simply

↓

"please, I need to live."

live

↓

It was the please that caught my memory.

caught memory

↓

I asked him what was so important.

asked

↓

"True love," he replied.

love

↓

Then he spoke of a girl...

girl spoke

↓

of surpassing beauty and faithfulness.

beauty

↓

I can only assume he meant you.

assume meant

↓

You should bless me for destroying him...

bless destroying

↓

before he found out what you really are.

found

↓

And what am I?

↓

Faithfulness he talked of, madam...

madam talked

↓

your enduring faithfulness.

↓

Tell me truly. When you found out he was gone...

found gone truly

↓

did you get engaged to your prince that same hour...

engaged hour prince

↓

or did you wait a whole week out of respect for the dead?

dead respect week whole whole-week

↓

You mocked me once. Never do it again!

mocked

↓

I died that day!

died

↓

You can die, too, for all I care!

care

↓

As... you... wish!

wish

↓

My sweet Westley.

sweet

↓

What have I done?

↓

They've disappeared.

disappeared

↓

He must've seen us closing in...

closing mustve seen

↓

which might account for his panicking into error.

account error might panicking

↓

Unless I'm wrong, and I am never wrong...

↓

they are headed dead into the Fire Swamp.

dead fire headed swamp

↓

Can you move at all?

↓

Move? You're alive.

alive

↓

If you want, I can fly.

↓

I told you I would always come for you.

↓

Why didn't you wait for me?

↓

Well...

↓

you were dead.

dead

↓

Death cannot stop true love.

cannot death love

↓

All it can do is delay it for a while.

delay

↓

I will never doubt again.

doubt

↓

There will never be a need.

↓

Oh, no. No, please.

↓

What is it? What's the matter?

matter

↓

They're kissing again.

kissing

↓

Do we have to hear the kissing part?

kissing part

↓

Someday you may not mind so much.

mind someday

↓

Skip on to the Fire Swamp. That sounded good.

fire skip sounded swamp

↓

You're sick. I'll humor you.

humor sick

↓

So now, where were we here?

↓

Westley and Buttercup raced along the ravine floor.

along buttercup floor

↓

Your pig fiancé is too late.

late

↓

A few more steps, and we'll be safe in the Fire Swamp.

fire safe steps swamp

↓

We'll never survive.

survive

↓

Nonsense! You only say that because no one ever has.

nonsense

↓

It's not that bad.

↓

I'm not saying I'd like to build a summer home here...

build home summer

↓

but the trees are actually quite lovely.

lovely trees

↓

Well, now, that was an adventure.

adventure

↓

Singed a bit, were you?

↓

You?

↓

One thing I will say...

↓

the fire swamp certainly does keep you on your toes.

certainly fire swamp toes

↓

This will all soon be but a happy memory...

happy memory

↓

because Roberts' ship Revenge is anchored at the far end...

revenge roberts ship

↓

and I, as you know, am Roberts.

roberts

↓

How is that possible...

possible

↓

since he's been marauding twenty years...

twenty years

↓

and you only left me five years ago?

five five-years left years

↓

I myself am often surprised at life's little quirks.

lifes often surprised

↓

What I told you before about saying please was true.

↓

It intrigued Roberts...

roberts

↓

as did my description of your beauty.

beauty description

↓

Finally, Roberts decided something.

decided finally roberts

↓

He said, "All right, Westley, I've never had a valet.

valet

↓

"You can try it for tonight.

tonight

↓

"I'll most likely kill you in the morning."

kill likely morning

↓

Three years he said that.

three three-years years

↓

"Good night, Westley, good work. Sleep well.

night sleep

↓

"I'll most likely kill you in the morning."

kill likely morning

↓

It was a fine time for me.

↓

I was learning to fence, fight, anything anyone would teach me.

fence fight learning teach

↓

And Roberts and I eventually became friends...

became eventually friends roberts

↓

and then it happened.

happened

↓

What? Go on.

↓

Roberts had grown so rich, he wanted to retire...

grown retire rich roberts wanted

↓

so he took me to his cabin and told me his secret.

cabin secret

↓

"I am not the Dread Pirate Roberts," he said.

pirate roberts

↓

"My name is Ryan.

name ryan

↓

"I inherited the ship from the previous Roberts...

previous roberts ship

↓

"just as you will inherit it from me.

↓

"The man I inherited it from wasn't the real Roberts, either.

real roberts

↓

"His name was Cumberbund.

name

↓

"The real Roberts has been retired fifteen years...

fifteen real retired roberts years

↓

"and living like a king." Thank you.

king living

↓

Then he explained the name was the important thing...

explained name

↓

for inspiring the necessary fear.

fear inspiring necessary

↓

You see, no one would surrender to the Dread Pirate Westley.

pirate surrender

↓

So we sailed ashore, took on an entirely new crew.

crew entirely sailed

↓

And he stayed aboard for a while as first mate...

aboard mate stayed

↓

all the time calling me Roberts.

calling roberts

↓

Once the crew believed, he left the ship...

believed crew left ship

↓

and I have been Roberts ever since.

roberts

↓

Except, now that we're together...

except

↓

I shall retire and hand the name over to someone else.

hand name retire

↓

Is everything clear to you?

clear

↓

We'll never succeed.

succeed

↓

We may as well die here.

↓

No, we have already succeeded.

↓

I mean, what are the three terrors of the Fire Swamp?

fire swamp terrors three

↓

One, the flame spurt. No problem.

flame problem

↓

There's a popping sound preceding each.

popping sound

↓

We can avoid that.

avoid

↓

Two, the lightning sand.

lightning sand

↓

But you were clever enough to discover what that looks like...

clever discover

↓

so in the future, we can avoid that, too.

avoid future

↓

Westley, what about the R.O.U.S. S?

↓

Rodents of Unusual Size?

rodents size unusual

↓

I don't think they exist.

exist

↓

We did it.

↓

Now, was that so terrible?

↓

Surrender!

surrender

↓

You mean you wish to surrender to me?

surrender wish

↓

Very well. I accept.

accept

↓

I give you full marks for bravery.

bravery full marks

↓

Don't make yourself a fool.

fool

↓

But how will you capture us?

capture

↓

We know the secrets of the Fire Swamp.

fire secrets swamp

↓

We can live there quite happily for some time...

happily live

↓

so whenever you feel like dying, feel free to visit.

dying free visit

↓

I tell you once again, surrender!

surrender

↓

It will not happen.

happen

↓

For the last time, surrender!

surrender

↓

Death first!

death

↓

Will you promise not to hurt him?!

hurt promise

↓

- What was that? - What was that?

↓

If we surrender and I return with you...

return surrender

↓

will you promise not to hurt this man?

hurt promise

↓

May I live a thousand years and never hunt again.

hunt live thousand thousand-years years

↓

He is a sailor on the pirate ship Revenge.

pirate revenge sailor ship

↓

Promise to return him to his ship.

promise return ship

↓

I swear it will be done.

swear

↓

Once we're out of sight, take him back to Florin...

sight

↓

and throw him in the Pit of Despair.

despair throw

↓

I swear it will be done.

swear

↓

I thought you were dead once, and it almost destroyed me.

dead destroyed

↓

I could not bear it if you died again...

bear died

↓

not when I could save you.

save

↓

Come, sir.

↓

We must get you to your ship.

must ship

↓

We are men of action.

action

↓

Lies do not become us.

become lies

↓

Well spoken, sir.

spoken

↓

What is it?

↓

You have six fingers on your right hand.

fingers hand

↓

Someone was looking for you.

looking

↓

Where am I?

↓

The Pit of Despair.

despair

↓

Don't even think...

↓

Don't even think about trying to escape.

escape

↓

The chains are far too thick.

chains thick

↓

And don't dream of being rescued, either.

dream rescued

↓

The only way in is secret.

secret

↓

Only the prince, the count, and I...

count prince

↓

know how to get in and out.

↓

Then I'm here till I die?

till

↓

Till they kill you, yeah.

kill till

↓

Then why bother curing me?

bother

↓

The prince and count insist on everyone being healthy...

count healthy insist prince

↓

before they're broken.

broken

↓

So it's to be torture.

torture

↓

I can cope with torture.

cope torture

↓

You don't believe me?

believe

↓

You survived the Fire Swamp.

fire survived swamp

↓

You must be very brave...

brave must

↓

but nobody withstands the Machine.

machine nobody

↓

She's been like that ever since the Fire Swamp.

fire swamp

↓

It's my father's failing health that's upsetting her.

failing fathers health upsetting

↓

Of course.

course

↓

The king died that very night...

died king night

↓

and before the following dawn...

dawn following

↓

Buttercup and Humperdinck were married.

buttercup married

↓

And at noon, she met her subjects again...

noon subjects

↓

this time, as their queen.

queen

↓

My father's final words were...

fathers final words

↓

Hold it! Hold it, Grandpa.

grandpa

↓

You read that wrong.

read

↓

She doesn't marry Humperdinck. She marries Westley.

marry

↓

I'm just sure of it.

↓

After all that Westley did for her...

↓

if she didn't marry him, it wouldn't be fair.

fair marry

↓

Who says life is fair?

fair life

↓

Where is that written?

written

↓

Life isn't always fair.

fair life

↓

I'm telling you, you're messing up the story!

messing story telling

↓

Now, get it right!

↓

Do you want me to go on with this?

↓

All right, then, no more interruptions.

↓

"At noon, she met her subjects again...

noon subjects

↓

this time, as their queen."

queen

↓

My father's final words were...

fathers final words

↓

"Love her as I loved her, and there will be joy."

love loved

↓

I present to you your queen!

present queen

↓

Queen Buttercup!

buttercup queen

↓

Why do you do this?

↓

You had love in your hands, and you gave it up!

hands love

↓

They would have killed Westley if I hadn't done it.

killed

↓

Your true love lives, and you marry another!

another lives love marry

↓

True love saved her in the Fire Swamp...

fire love saved swamp

↓

and she treated it like garbage!

garbage treated

↓

And that's what she is... the Queen of Refuse!

queen refuse

↓

So bow down to her if you want! Bow to her!

↓

Bow to the Queen of Slime!

queen

↓

The Queen of Filth!

filth queen

↓

The Queen of Putrescence!

queen

↓

Rubbish! Filth! Slime! Muck!

filth

↓

It was ten days till the wedding.

days till wedding

↓

The king still lived.

king lived

↓

But Buttercup's nightmares were growing steadily worse.

growing nightmares worse

↓

See? Didn't I say she'd never marry that rotten Humperdinck?

marry rotten shed

↓

Yes, you're very smart. Shut up.

smart

↓

It comes to this.

comes

↓

I love Westley. I always have.

love

↓

I know now I always will.

↓

If you tell me I must marry you in ten days...

days marry must

↓

please believe I will be dead by morning.

believe dead morning

↓

I could never cause you grief.

grief

↓

Consider our wedding off.

consider wedding

↓

You returned this...

returned

↓

Westley to his ship?

ship

↓

Then we will simply alert him.

alert simply

↓

Beloved... are you certain he still wants you?

beloved certain wants

↓

After all, it was you who did the leaving in the Fire Swamp.

fire leaving swamp

↓

Not to mention that pirates are not known as men of their words.

known mention pirates words

↓

My Westley will always come for me.

↓

I suggest a deal.

deal suggest

↓

You write four copies of a letter.

copies four letter write

↓

I'll send my four fastest ships, one in each direction.

direction fastest four send ships

↓

The Dread Pirate Roberts...

pirate roberts

↓

is always close to Florin this time of year.

close

↓

We'll run up the white flag and deliver your message.

deliver flag message white

↓

If Westley wants you, bless you both.

bless wants

↓

If not...

↓

please consider me as an alternative to suicide.

alternative consider suicide

↓

Are we agreed?

agreed

↓

Your princess is really quite a winning creature.

creature princess winning

↓

A trifle simple, perhaps, but her appeal is undeniable.

appeal perhaps simple undeniable

↓

I know. The people are quite taken with her.

taken

↓

It's odd, but when I hired Vizzini...

hired

↓

to have her murdered on our engagement day...

engagement murdered

↓

I thought that was clever.

clever

↓

But it's going to be so much more moving...

moving

↓

when I strangle her on our wedding night.

night strangle wedding

↓

Once Guilder is blamed...

blamed

↓

the nation will be truly outraged.

nation outraged truly

↓

They'll demand we go to war.

demand

↓

Now, where is that secret knot?

knot secret

↓

It's impossible to find.

impossible

↓

Are you coming down into the pit?

coming

↓

Westley's got his strength back.

strength

↓

I'm starting him on the Machine tonight.

machine starting tonight

↓

Tyrone, you know how much I love watching you work...

love tyrone watching

↓

but I've got my country's 500th anniversary to plan...

anniversary countrys plan

↓

my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder...

arrange murder wedding wife

↓

and Guilder to frame for it. I'm swamped.

frame swamped

↓

Get some rest.

rest

↓

If you haven't got your health, you haven't got anything.

health

↓

Beautiful, isn't it?

↓

It took me half a lifetime to invent it.

half invent lifetime

↓

I'm sure you've discovered...

discovered

↓

my deep and abiding interest in pain.

deep interest pain

↓

At present, I'm writing the definitive work...

definitive present writing

↓

on the subject.

subject

↓

So I want you to be totally honest with me...

honest

↓

on how the Machine makes you feel.

machine makes

↓

This being our first try, I'll use the lowest setting.

lowest setting

↓

As you know, the concept of the suction pump...

concept pump suction

↓

is centuries old.

centuries

↓

Well, really, that's all this is.

↓

Except that, instead of sucking water...

except sucking water

↓

I'm sucking life.

life sucking

↓

I've just sucked one year of your life away.

life sucked

↓

I might one day go as high as five...

five might

↓

but I really don't know what that would do to you...

↓

so let's just start with what we have.

start

↓

What did this do to you? Tell me.

↓

And remember, this is for posterity...

remember

↓

so be honest.

honest

↓

How do you feel?

↓

Interesting.

interesting

↓

Yellin.

↓

Sire.

↓

As chief enforcer of all Florin, I trust you with this secret.

chief secret trust

↓

Killers from Guilder...

killers

↓

are infiltrating the Thieves' Forest...

forest thieves

↓

and plan to murder my bride on our wedding night.

bride murder night plan wedding

↓

My spy network has heard no such news.

heard network news

↓

Any word from Westley?

word

↓

Too soon, my angel.

angel

↓

Patience.

patience

↓

He will come for me.

↓

Of course.

course

↓

She will not be murdered.

murdered

↓

On the day of the wedding...

wedding

↓

I want the Thieves' Forest emptied...

emptied forest thieves

↓

and every inhabitant arrested.

arrested

↓

Many of the thieves will resist.

resist thieves

↓

My regular enforcers will be inadequate.

regular

↓

Form a brute squad, then!

brute form squad

↓

I want the Thieves' Forest emptied before I wed.

emptied forest thieves

↓

It won't be easy, sire.

easy

↓

Try ruling the world sometime.

ruling sometime world

↓

The day of the wedding arrived.

arrived wedding

↓

The brute squad had their hands full...

brute full hands squad

↓

carrying out Humperdinck's orders.

carrying orders

↓

Up! Up! Up!

↓

Come on! Come on!

↓

- Is everybody out? - Almost.

everybody

↓

There's a Spaniard giving us some trouble.

giving trouble

↓

Well, you give him some trouble.

trouble

↓

Move.

↓

I am waiting for you, Vizzini.

waiting

↓

You told me to go back to the beginning, so I have.

beginning

↓

This is where I am, and this is where I'll stay.

↓

I will not be moved.

moved

↓

Ho there!

↓

I do not budge. Keep your "ho there."

budge

↓

The prince gave orders.

orders prince

↓

So did Vizzini.

↓

When a job went wrong, you went back to the beginning.

beginning

↓

This is where we got the job, so it's the beginning.

beginning

↓

And I am staying till Vizzini come.

staying till

↓

You brute, come here!

brute

↓

I am waiting for Vizzini.

waiting

↓

You surely are a meanie.

surely

↓

It's you.

↓

True.

↓

You don't look so good.

↓

You don't smell so good, either.

smell

↓

Perhaps not.

perhaps

↓

I feel fine.

↓

Fezzik and Inigo were reunited.

reunited

↓

As Fezzik nursed his inebriated friend back to health...

friend health

↓

he told Inigo of Vizzini's death...

death

↓

and the existence of Count Rugen...

count existence

↓

the six-fingered man.

fingered

↓

Considering Inigo's lifelong search...

considering lifelong search

↓

he handled the news surprisingly well.

handled news surprisingly

↓

Fezzik took great care in reviving Inigo.

care

↓

That's enough!

↓

Where is this Rugen now so I may kill him?

kill

↓

He's with the prince in the castle...

castle prince

↓

but the castle gate is guarded by thirty men.

castle gate thirty

↓

How many could you handle?

handle

↓

I don't think more than ten.

↓

Leaving twenty for me.

leaving twenty

↓

At my best, I could never defeat that many.

best defeat

↓

I need Vizzini to plan. I have no gift for strategy.

gift plan strategy

↓

But Vizzini is dead.

dead

↓

No. Not Vizzini.

↓

I need the man in black.

black

↓

What?

↓

He bested you with strength, your greatness.

greatness strength

↓

He bested me with steel.

steel

↓

He must have out-thought Vizzini.

must

↓

A man who can do that can plan my castle onslaught any day.

castle plan

↓

- Let's go. - Where?

↓

Find the man in black, obviously.

black obviously

↓

But you don't know where he is.

↓

Don't bother me with trifles.

bother

↓

After twenty years, at last...

twenty years

↓

my father's soul will be at peace.

fathers peace soul

↓

There will be blood tonight!

blood tonight

↓

Rise and report.

report rise

↓

The Thieves' Forest is emptied.

emptied forest thieves

↓

Thirty men guard the castle gate.

castle gate guard thirty

↓

Double it.

double

↓

My princess must be safe.

must princess safe

↓

The gate has but one key...

gate

↓

and I carry that.

carry

↓

My dulcet darling!

darling

↓

Tonight, we marry.

marry tonight

↓

Tomorrow morning, your men will escort us to Florin Channel...

channel escort morning tomorrow tomorrow-morning

↓

where every ship in my armada...

ship

↓

waits to accompany us on our honeymoon.

honeymoon waits

↓

Every ship but your four fastest, you mean.

fastest four ship

↓

Every ship but the four you sent.

four sent ship

↓

Yes, of course.

course

↓

Naturally, not those four.

four naturally

↓

Your Majesties.

↓

You never sent the ships.

sent ships

↓

Don't bother lying.

bother lying

↓

It doesn't matter.

matter

↓

Westley will come for me, anyway.

↓

You're a silly girl.

girl silly

↓

Yes, I am a silly girl...

girl silly

↓

for not having seen sooner that you were nothing but a coward...

coward having seen sooner

↓

with a heart full of fear.

fear full heart

↓

I would not say such things if I were you.

↓

Why not? You can't hurt me.

hurt

↓

Westley and I are joined by the bonds of love...

bonds joined love

↓

and you cannot track that...

cannot track

↓

not with a thousand bloodhounds...

thousand

↓

and you cannot break it...

break cannot

↓

not with a thousand swords.

swords thousand

↓

And when I say you are a coward...

coward

↓

that is only because you are the slimiest weakling...

↓

ever to crawl the earth.

crawl earth

↓

I would not say such things if I were you!

↓

You truly love each other...

love truly

↓

and so you might have been truly happy.

happy might truly

↓

Not one couple in a century has that chance...

century chance couple

↓

no matter what the storybooks say.

matter

↓

So I think no man in a century...

century

↓

will suffer as greatly as you will.

suffer

↓

Not to fifty!

fifty

↓

Listen. Do you hear?

↓

That is the sound of ultimate suffering.

sound suffering ultimate

↓

My heart made that sound when Rugen slaughtered my father.

father heart slaughtered sound

↓

The man in black makes it now.

black makes

↓

The man in black?

black

↓

His true love is marrying another tonight.

another love marrying tonight

↓

Who else has the cause for ultimate suffering?

suffering ultimate

↓

Excuse me. Pardon me, it's important.

excuse pardon

↓

Fezzik, please.

↓

Everybody, move!

everybody

↓

Thank you.

↓

Where is the man in black?

black

↓

You get there from this grove, yes?

grove

↓

Fezzik, jog his memory.

memory

↓

I'm sorry, Inigo.

↓

I didn't mean to jog him so hard.

hard

↓

Father, I have failed you for twenty years.

failed father twenty years

↓

Now our misery can end.

misery

↓

Somewhere...

↓

somewhere close by is a man who can help us.

close

↓

I cannot find him alone.

alone cannot

↓

I need you.

↓

I need you to guide my sword.

guide sword

↓

Please.

↓

Guide my sword.

guide sword

↓

He's dead.

dead

↓

It just is not fair.

fair

↓

Grandpa, wait!

grandpa

↓

Wait. What did Fezzik mean, "He's dead"?

dead

↓

I mean, he didn't mean dead.

dead

↓

Westley's only faking... right?

faking

↓

You want me to read this or not?

read

↓

Who gets Humperdinck?

↓

I don't understand.

↓

Who kills Prince Humperdinck at the end?

kills prince

↓

Somebody's got to do it.

somebodys

↓

Is it Inigo? Who?

↓

Nobody. Nobody kills him.

kills nobody

↓

He lives.

lives

↓

You mean he wins?

wins

↓

Jesus, Grandpa, what did you read me this thing for?

grandpa jesus read

↓

You've been very sick...

sick

↓

and you're taking this story very seriously.

story

↓

I think we ought to stop now.

ought

↓

No. I'm OK.

↓

Sit down. I'm all right.

↓

All right, now, let's see, where were we?

↓

In the Pit of Despair.

despair

↓

We Montoyas have never taken defeat easily.

defeat easily taken

↓

Come along, Fezzik. Bring the body.

along body bring

↓

The body?

body

↓

Have you any money?

money

↓

I have a little.

↓

I just hope it's enough to buy a miracle, that's all.

hope miracle

↓

Go away!

↓

What? What?

↓

Are you the Miracle Max...

miracle

↓

who worked for the king all those years?

king worked years

↓

The king's stinking son fired me.

fired kings stinking

↓

And thank you for bringing up such a painful subject.

bringing painful subject

↓

While you're at it, why don't you give me a nice paper cut...

paper

↓

and pour lemon juice on it?

juice lemon pour

↓

We're closed!

closed

↓

Beat it, or I'll call the brute squad.

beat brute squad

↓

I'm on the brute squad.

brute squad

↓

You are the brute squad.

brute squad

↓

We need a miracle. It's very important.

miracle

↓

Look, I'm retired. And besides...

besides retired

↓

why would you want someone the king's stinking son fired?

fired kings stinking

↓

I might kill whoever you wanted me to miracle.

kill might miracle wanted

↓

He's already dead.

dead

↓

He is, huh?

↓

I'll take a look. Bring him in.

bring

↓

I've seen worse.

seen worse

↓

Sir?

↓

We're in a terrible rush.

rush

↓

Don't rush me, sonny.

rush

↓

You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.

miracle miracles rotten rush

↓

You got money?

money

↓

Sixty-five.

five sixty

↓

I never worked for so little...

worked

↓

except once, and that was a very noble cause.

except noble

↓

This is noble, sir.

noble

↓

His wife is crippled.

crippled wife

↓

His children are on the brink of starvation.

brink children

↓

Are you a rotten liar!

liar rotten

↓

I need him to help avenge my father...

father

↓

murdered these twenty years.

murdered twenty years

↓

Your first story was better. Where's that bellows?

story

↓

He probably owes you money, huh? Well, I'll ask him.

money owes

↓

He's dead. He can't talk.

dead

↓

Look who knows so much, huh?

knows

↓

It just so happens your friend is only mostly dead.

dead friend happens mostly

↓

There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead.

dead difference mostly

↓

Please open his mouth.

mouth open

↓

Now, mostly dead is slightly alive.

alive dead mostly slightly

↓

Now, all dead... well, with all dead...

dead

↓

there's usually only one thing that you can do.

usually

↓

What's that?

↓

Go through his clothes and look for loose change.

change clothes loose

↓

Hello in there!

↓

What's so important?

↓

What you got here that's worth living for?

living worth worth-living

↓

Tr-u-u-ue lo-o-o-ove.

↓

True love. You heard him?

heard love

↓

You could not ask for a more noble cause than that.

noble

↓

Hey, sonny...

↓

true love is the greatest thing in the world...

greatest love world

↓

except for a nice M.L.T...

except

↓

mutton, lettuce, and tomato sandwich...

lettuce sandwich tomato

↓

when the mutton is nice and lean and the tomato is ripe.

lean ripe tomato

↓

They're so perky. I love that.

love perky

↓

But that's not what he said.

↓

He distinctly said, "To bl-a-a-ave."

distinctly

↓

And as we all know, to blave means to bluff, huh?

bluff

↓

So you were probably playing cards, and he cheated...

cards cheated playing

↓

Liar!

liar

↓

Get back, witch!

witch

↓

I'm not a witch! I'm your wife!

wife witch

↓

But after what you just said...

↓

I'm not even sure I want to be that anymore!

anymore

↓

You never had it so good.

↓

He said true love, Max.

love

↓

Don't say another word, Valerie!

another another-word word

↓

He's afraid.

afraid

↓

Ever since Prince Humperdinck fired him...

fired prince

↓

his confidence is shattered.

confidence shattered

↓

Why'd you say that name?

name whyd

↓

You promised me that you would never say that name!

name promised

↓

What? Humperdinck?

↓

I'm not listening!

listening

↓

A life expiring...

life

↓

and you don't have the decency to say why you won't help!

decency

↓

- Nobody's hearing nothing! - Humperdinck!

hearing nobodys

↓

This is Buttercup's true love.

love

↓

If you heal him, he will stop Humperdinck's wedding.

heal wedding

↓

Shut up! Wait a minute.

minute

↓

I make him better, Humperdinck suffers?

suffers

↓

Humiliations galore!

↓

That is a noble cause.

noble

↓

Give me the sixty-five. I'm on the job.

five sixty

↓

That's a miracle pill?

miracle pill

↓

The chocolate coating makes it go down easier...

chocolate easier makes

↓

but you have to wait 15 minutes for full potency...

full minutes

↓

and you shouldn't go swimming for at least, what?

least swimming

↓

- An hour. A good hour. - Yeah, an hour.

hour

↓

Thank you for everything.

↓

Bye-bye, boys.

boys

↓

Have fun storming the castle.

castle fun storming

↓

Think it'll work?

itll

↓

It would take a miracle.

miracle

↓

Anything?

↓

Inigo, there's more than thirty.

thirty

↓

What's the difference?

difference

↓

We've got him.

↓

Help me here.

↓

We'll have to force-feed him.

feed force

↓

Has it been fifteen minutes?

fifteen minutes

↓

We can't wait. The wedding's in half an hour.

half hour weddings

↓

We must strike in the hustle and bustle beforehand.

beforehand hustle must strike

↓

Tilt his head back.

head tilt

↓

Open his mouth.

mouth open

↓

How long do we have to wait...

↓

before if we know the miracle works?

miracle works

↓

Your guess is as good as mine.

↓

I'll beat you apart! I'll take you both together!

apart beat

↓

I guess not very long.

↓

Why won't my arms move?

arms

↓

You've been mostly dead all day.

dead mostly

↓

We had Miracle Max make a pill to bring you back.

bring miracle pill

↓

Who are you?

↓

Are we enemies?

enemies

↓

Why am I on this wall?

wall

↓

Where's Buttercup?

buttercup

↓

Let me explain.

explain

↓

No, there is too much. Let me sum up.

↓

Buttercup's marrying Humperdinck in less than half an hour...

half hour less marrying

↓

so all we have to do is get in, break up the wedding...

break wedding

↓

steal the princess, make our escape...

escape princess steal

↓

after I kill Count Rugen.

count kill

↓

That doesn't leave much time for dilly-dallying.

dilly

↓

You just wiggled your finger!

finger

↓

That's wonderful!

↓

I've always been a quick healer.

healer quick

↓

What are our liabilities?

↓

There is but one working castle gate.

castle gate working

↓

Come on.

↓

And it is guarded by sixty men.

sixty

↓

And our assets?

assets

↓

Your brains, Fezzik's strength, my steel.

brains steel strength

↓

That's it?

↓

Lmpossible.

↓

If I had a month to plan...

month plan

↓

maybe I could come up with something, but this...

↓

You just shook your head!

head shook

↓

That doesn't make you happy?

happy

↓

My brains, his steel...

brains steel

↓

and your strength against sixty men...

sixty strength

↓

and a little head jiggle is supposed to make me happy?

happy head jiggle supposed

↓

If we only had a wheelbarrow, that would be something.

↓

Where did we put the wheelbarrow the albino had?

albino

↓

Over the albino, I think.

albino

↓

Why didn't you list that among our assets in the first place?

among assets list place

↓

What I wouldn't give for a holocaust cloak.

holocaust

↓

There we cannot help you.

cannot

↓

Will this do?

↓

- Where did you get that? - At Miracle Max's.

miracle

↓

It fit so nice, he said I could keep it.

↓

All right. Come on, help me up.

↓

I'll need a sword eventually.

eventually sword

↓

Why? You can't even lift one.

lift

↓

True, but that's hardly common knowledge, is it?

common hardly knowledge

↓

Thank you.

↓

There may be problems once we're inside.

problems

↓

I'll say. How do I find the count?

count

↓

Once I do, how do I find you again?

↓

Once I find you again, how do we escape?

escape

↓

Don't pester him.

↓

He's had a hard day.

hard

↓

Right, right. Sorry.

↓

- Inigo. - What?

↓

I hope we win.

hope

↓

You don't seem excited, my little muffin.

excited muffin

↓

Should I be?

↓

Brides often are, I'm told.

brides often

↓

I do not marry tonight.

marry tonight

↓

My Westley will save me.

save

↓

Marriage...

marriage

↓

Marriage is what brings us together... today.

brings marriage today

↓

Marriage...

marriage

↓

that blessed arrangement...

arrangement blessed

↓

that dream within a dream...

dream

↓

Stand your ground, men!

ground stand

↓

I am the Dread Pirate Roberts.

pirate roberts

↓

There will be no survivor!

survivor

↓

- Now? - Not yet.

↓

My men are here.

↓

I am here...

↓

but soon you will not be here.

↓

- Now? - Light him.

light

↓

The Dread Pirate Roberts...

pirate roberts

↓

takes no survivors.

survivors takes

↓

All your worst nightmares...

nightmares worst

↓

are about to come true.

↓

Then love...

love

↓

true love...

love

↓

will follow you...

follow

↓

forever.

forever

↓

The Dread Pirate Roberts...

pirate roberts

↓

is here for your souls!

souls

↓

Stay where you are!

↓

Fight!

fight

↓

Stay where you are!

↓

So treasure your love.

love treasure

↓

Skip to the end.

skip

↓

Have you the ring?

ring

↓

Here comes my Westley now.

comes

↓

Fezzik, the portcullis!

↓

Your Westley is dead.

dead

↓

I killed him myself.

killed

↓

Then why is there fear behind your eyes?

behind eyes fear

↓

Give us the gate key.

gate

↓

I have no gate key.

gate

↓

Fezzik, tear his arms off.

arms tear

↓

You mean this gate key?

gate

↓

...and do you, Princess Buttercup...

buttercup princess

↓

Man and wife! Say man and wife!

wife

↓

Man and wife.

wife

↓

Escort the bride to the honeymoon suite.

bride escort honeymoon suite

↓

I'll be there shortly.

shortly

↓

He didn't come.

↓

Kill the dark one and the giant...

dark giant kill

↓

but leave the third for questioning.

questioning third

↓

My name is Inigo Montoya.

name

↓

You killed my father.

father killed

↓

Prepare to die.

prepare

↓

I need you!

↓

I can't leave him alone.

alone

↓

He's getting away from me, Fezzik!

↓

Please!

↓

I'll be right back.

↓

Thank you.

↓

Strange wedding.

strange wedding

↓

Yes... a very strange wedding.

strange wedding

↓

Come along.

along

↓

What was that for?

↓

Because you've always been so kind to me.

↓

And I won't be seeing you again...

seeing

↓

since I'm killing myself once we reach the honeymoon suite.

honeymoon killing reach suite

↓

Won't that be nice?

↓

She kissed me!

kissed

↓

Sorry, Father.

father

↓

I tried.

tried

↓

You must be that little Spanish brat...

brat must spanish

↓

I taught a lesson to all those years ago.

lesson taught years

↓

Simply incredible.

incredible simply

↓

Have you been chasing me your whole life...

chasing life whole whole-life

↓

only to fail now?

fail

↓

I think that's the worst thing I've ever heard.

heard worst

↓

How marvelous.

marvelous

↓

There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world.

breasts perfect world

↓

It would be a pity to damage yours.

damage pity

↓

Oh, Westley, darling!

darling

↓

Westley, why won't you hold me?

↓

Gently.

gently

↓

At a time like this...

↓

that's all you can think to say, gently?

gently

↓

Gently!

gently

↓

Good heavens, are you still trying to win?

heavens

↓

You've got an overdeveloped sense of vengeance.

sense vengeance

↓

It's going to get you into trouble someday.

someday trouble

↓

My name is Inigo Montoya.

name

↓

You killed my father.

father killed

↓

Prepare to die.

prepare

↓

My name is Inigo Montoya.

name

↓

You killed my father.

father killed

↓

Prepare to die.

prepare

↓

Hello! My name is Inigo Montoya.

name

↓

You killed my father. Prepare to die.

father killed prepare

↓

Stop saying that!

↓

Hello! My name is Inigo Montoya!

name

↓

You killed my father!

father killed

↓

Prepare to die!

prepare

↓

Offer me money.

money offer

↓

Power, too, promise me that.

power promise

↓

All that I have and more, please.

↓

Offer me everything I ask for.

offer

↓

Anything you want.

↓

I want my father back, you son of a bitch!

bitch father

↓

Westley, will you ever forgive me?

forgive

↓

What hideous sin have you committed lately?

committed hideous lately

↓

I got married. I didn't want to. It all happened so fast.

fast happened married

↓

It never happened. It never happened.

happened

↓

But it did. I was there.

↓

This old man said man and wife.

wife

↓

Did you say I do?

↓

We sort of skipped that part.

part skipped

↓

Then you're not married.

married

↓

If you didn't say it, you didn't do it.

↓

Wouldn't you agree, Your Highness?

agree highness

↓

A technicality that will shortly be remedied.

shortly

↓

But first things first.

↓

To the death.

death

↓

To the pain.

pain

↓

I don't think I'm quite familiar with that phrase.

familiar phrase

↓

I'll explain...

explain

↓

and I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand...

words

↓

you warthog-faced buffoon.

buffoon faced warthog

↓

That may be the first time in my life...

life

↓

a man has dared insult me.

insult

↓

It won't be the last.

↓

To the pain means the first thing you lose...

lose pain

↓

will be your feet below the ankles...

ankles feet

↓

then your hands at the wrists...

hands

↓

next your nose.

nose

↓

And then my tongue, I suppose.

suppose tongue

↓

I killed you too quickly the last time...

killed quickly

↓

a mistake I don't mean to duplicate tonight.

mistake tonight

↓

I wasn't finished.

finished

↓

The next thing you lose will be your left eye, then your right.

left lose

↓

And then my ears. I understand! Let's get on with it!

ears

↓

Wrong! Your ears you keep, and I'll tell you why...

ears

↓

so every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness...

child seeing

↓

will be yours to cherish.

cherish

↓

Every babe that weeps at your approach...

approach babe

↓

every woman who cries out, "God, what is that thing"...

cries woman

↓

will echo in your perfect ears.

ears echo perfect

↓

That is what "to the pain" means.

pain

↓

It means I leave you in anguish...

↓

wallowing in freakish misery forever.

forever misery

↓

I think you're bluffing.

bluffing

↓

It's possible, pig!

possible

↓

I might be bluffing.

bluffing might

↓

It's conceivable, you miserable vomitous mass...

mass miserable

↓

I'm only lying here because I lack the strength to stand.

lack lying stand strength

↓

Then again...

↓

perhaps I have the strength after all.

perhaps strength

↓

Drop your sword.

drop sword

↓

Have a seat.

seat

↓

Tie him up.

↓

Make it as tight as you like.

tight

↓

Where's Fezzik?

↓

I thought he was with you.

↓

In that case...

case

↓

Help him.

↓

Why does Westley need helping?

helping

↓

Because he has no strength.

strength

↓

I knew you were bluffing! I knew he was bluffing.

bluffing

↓

- Shall I dispatch him for you? - Thank you, but no.

↓

Whatever happens to us...

happens

↓

I want him to live a long life, alone with his cowardice.

alone life live

↓

Inigo, where are you?

↓

There you are.

↓

Inigo, I saw the prince's stables...

princes

↓

and there they were, four white horses.

four horses white

↓

And I thought, there are four of us...

four

↓

if we ever find the lady.

lady

↓

Hello, lady.

lady

↓

So I took them with me in case we ever bumped into each other.

bumped case

↓

I guess we just did.

↓

You did something right.

↓

Don't worry. I won't let it go to my head.

head worry

↓

You know...

↓

it's very strange.

strange

↓

I have been in the revenge business so long...

business revenge

↓

now that it's over...

↓

I don't know what to do with the rest of my life.

life rest

↓

Have you ever considered piracy?

considered

↓

You'd make a wonderful Dread Pirate Roberts.

pirate roberts

↓

They rode to freedom.

freedom rode

↓

And as dawn arose, Westley and Buttercup knew they were safe.

buttercup dawn safe

↓

A wave of love swept over them.

love wave

↓

And as they reached for each other...

reached

↓

What? What?

↓

It's kissing again. You don't want to hear that.

kissing

↓

I don't mind so much.

mind

↓

Since the invention of the kiss...

invention kiss

↓

there have been five kisses...

five kisses

↓

that were rated the most passionate...

passionate rated

↓

the most pure.

pure

↓

This one left them all behind.

behind left

↓

The end.

↓

Now I think you ought to go to sleep.

ought sleep

↓

All right.

↓

So long.

↓

Grandpa...

grandpa

↓

maybe you could come over...

↓

and read it again to me tomorrow.

read tomorrow

↓

As you wish.

wish