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🎲 Surprise Me

Results (89094)

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about some recent activity on your new account.
accountactivityrecent
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Some recent activity on my new account?
accountactivityrecent
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- We got a big problem here, buddy. - All right. Try it again.
buddyproblem
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I've tried it three times, okay? It's just not working.
threethree-timestimestriedworking
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Need I remind you that the services have already been rendered, Charlie.
charlieremindservices
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- We got to pay these girls. - He cut us off.
girls
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- Is there a problem? - No.
problem
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- Not a problem here. - Yeah, I'm calling Hector.
callingproblem
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- No, no. Don't call Hector. - I'm calling Wallace.
calling
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We shouldn't be calling Hector or Wallace or any other large pimp.
callingpimp
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Charlie and I are gonna handle this situation
charliehandlesituation
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just like we handle every situation. - Yeah, we are gonna...
handlesituation
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Well, you know, we'll just go back to work for a little while.
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Just for a little while 'til we have enough money to buy some more crack.
crackmoney
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And then, we'll go on welfare, and I'll go be a star.
starwelfare
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And then I can be a veterinarian of some kind.
veterinarian
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- Maybe we should think about rehab. - Go to rehab as soon as possible.
possiblerehab
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- In a couple days. - Yeah.
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Not now. (shouting)
shouting
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- Ah, Jesus Christ! That was close. - Oh, look who it is!
christclosejesusjesus-christ
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- What the hell are you doing here? - We're getting our jobs back.
jobs
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- You can't have em! - We might have a drug problem.
drugdrug-problemmightproblem
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Oh, see, I might not really care. Your positions have been filled.
carefilledmightpositions
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- So we're gonna take yours. - You're not gonna take our jobs.
jobs
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My dad called and said that we could have your jobs.
calledjobs
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We need money to pay our hookers, okay? So you can't have 'em.
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- But we need money to buy crack. - Oh, I'm sorry.
crackmoney
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Did you get addicted to crack? Did somebody get addicted to crack?
addictedcracksomebody
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(mock crying) I sweat uncontrollably!
cryingmocksweat
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I can't get somebody to have sex with me unless I pay for it!
somebody
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(arguing) Children, what's all the fighting about?
arguingchildrenfighting
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Did you tell them that they could have our jobs?
jobs
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Why don't we go on inside where it's nice and warm
warm
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and we can settle this like a family?
familysettle
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- Yeah, what about the slaves? - Slaves are gone.
goneslaves
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They were bringing me down. Plus, you know they don't drink?
bringingdrinkplus
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- Drink? I want a drink. - Wait, wait, wait!
drink
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Stop a second. There are gonna be some changes made. All right?
changessecond
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First of all, you two from now on are gonna do all of Charlie's work.
charlies
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- No. Not his. - Stop!
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Charlie, you got a lot of balls stealing my money.
ballscharliemoneystealing
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This shows leadership. I am promoting you to management.
leadershipmanagementshows
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- That's why I did it. - That's fantastic!
fantastic
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That's why I did it too, Frank. I stole lots of money. What do I get?
franklotsmoneystole
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You get dick, because you are a follower and a thief.
dickthief
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How come Charlie? Not fair.
charliefair
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- How come Charlie? - Why would you do this to us, Dad?
charlie
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Because you are crackheads, children.
children