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🎲 Surprise Me

Results (6345)

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44e4db24-24e9-4227-99dd-7a191ca66e2c.gif
Go for it. Get it done.
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4cf52324-3325-467a-b4be-9392bad5ea72.gif
Hey, Colin.
colin
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You know, I was just thinking--
thinking
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I'm so curious.
curious
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Did you happen to bang your mom last night?
banghappennight
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Because I sure as hell didn't.
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- No. - Wait.
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Are you dating Colin's mom?
colinsdating
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Isn't that a conflict of interest?
conflictinterest
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- Are you gonna start giving him extra credit
creditextraextra-creditgivingstart
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because you're doing his mom? - He's not doing my mom.
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- Yeah, because you wouldn't leave us alone
alone
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long enough to do it.
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By the way, I want my 40 bucks back.
bucks
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- I tried to leave you alone and go to bed.
alonetried
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- Man, you blocked me all night.
blockednight
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You brought out your saxophone.
broughtsaxophone
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You showed us how to stop a ceiling fan with your hand.
ceilinghandshowed
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That's not a cool trick.
cooltrick
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- Mr. Griffin, have you ever dated a single mom?
datedgriffinsingle
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- Uh, yeah, yeah, one time.
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But she had a C-section, so it was all good.
section
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- You are a bad person.
person
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- Yeah, I forget you don't get jokes.
forgetjokes
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Tell your mom that one. She'll love it.
loveshell
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- You know, the obvious way to a single mom's heart
heartmomsobvioussingle
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is through her child.
child
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- You should have shown Colin some love.
colinloveshown
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- Yeah, she would have popped off on you, boss.
bosspopped
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- Okay, look, guys.
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Let's get one thing straight.
straight
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This isn't one of those cheesy
cheesy
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"Jerry Maguire" type situations
jerrysituationstype
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where I win the mom by falling in love
fallinglove
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with the freaky looking kid.
freakylooking
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- Fine.
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Then it's bye-bye Trish.
trish
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- All right, shut up, Marcus. Shut up. Let me think.
marcus
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Okay, we need to make a pros and cons list.
listpros
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Yeah. That's what we'll do.
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Victor, go to the board.
boardvictor
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On the pro side, she's, uh...
side
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well, gorgeous.
gorgeous
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Smart.
smart
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She's funny. Talented.
funnytalented
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And on the con side-- well, really--
side
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really, it's just Colin.
colin
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I mean, I really hate the Colin part.
colinhatepart