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Show: Episode: 🎲 Surprise Me

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- You are going to hell, little man! - Mmm, I don't think so.

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- That's politics, bitch. - I hate you, Charlie!

bitch charlie hate politics

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- You ready? - I'm ready.

ready

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Get in front of the flag and the million-dollar bill.

bill dollar dollar-bill flag front million million-dollar

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Dude, you and my dad share this futon?

futon share

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No.

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No, we... No, we got a whole different situation worked out.

situation whole worked

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- What's the situation? - It's... I sleep on the... And...

situation sleep

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You got the script that I wrote? Grab the script.

grab script wrote

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I've been meaning to speak to you about this.

meaning speak

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I can't read these words. They're not in the right order.

order read words

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- It's good. - I think you might be dyslexic.

dyslexic might

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- No, no! Please. Read it. - I think you might be dyslexic.

dyslexic might read

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- Read the script. - You want me to read the script?

read script

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- Yes. And action. - All right.

action

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I'll read the words you wrote. "Hello, fellow American.

american fellow read words wrote

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"This you should vote me. I leave power. Good.

power vote

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"Thank you. Thank you. If you vote me, I am hot."

vote

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What?

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"Taxes. They'll be lower, son.

lower taxes

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"The democratic vote for me is right thing to do, Philadelphia.

democratic philadelphia vote

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"So do." This doesn't make any sense.

sense

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Well, then just say whatever you want.

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The battery's dead. It's gone. I gotta charge it up again.

charge dead gone

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This one piece is makin'me nervous.

nervous piece

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- You need to stop touching me. - This right here.

touching

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Please stop touching me. This is really ridiculous.

ridiculous touching

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I'm stuffed in here like a jerk.

jerk stuffed

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- Deandra, you look sensational. - No, I don't.

deandra

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Just remember. Let Daddy do all the talkin'. (door opens)

daddy door door-opens opens remember talkin

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Sorry I'm late. (chuckles)

chuckles late

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- Jack Stanford. - Frank Reynolds.

frank frank-reynolds jack reynolds stanford

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- This here is my daughter, Deandra. - Hi.

daughter deandra

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Hi. Well, I never like to keep a beautiful woman waiting.

waiting woman

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- Oh. Thanks. - You see, uh, Mr. Stanford...

stanford thanks

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I myself am a problem solver

problem

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and you got a big problem on your hands.

hands problem

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- I'm afraid I'm not following. - Check out the goods to my right.

afraid check following goods

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This pretty little lady is not only my daughter.

daughter lady

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She happens to be your biggest opponent in the election.

biggest election happens opponent

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- Beauty and the beast. (laughs) - You're funny.

beast beauty funny laughs

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Let the men do the work here, Dee.

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Now we can make this problem go away

problem

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before it becomes a more expensive problem...

becomes expensive problem

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f you catch my... drift.

catch drift

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Are you trying to solicit a bribe from me?

bribe solicit

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- I don't know. Am I? - 'Cause if you are...

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... not only is that illegal and highly unethical...

highly illegal

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