🎲 Surprise Me

Results (63910)

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Now, what do you say, Champ, got a urine sample for me?
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But I just did five minutes ago.
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I know you did, but here's the thing.
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Take this cup, put it on the ground, close your eyes,
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and just go nuts. What do you say?
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- Cool! - Attaboy. Go get 'em, Champ.
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- Why are you here? - Seems like a good kid.
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Worried about being on call tonight, aren't you?
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Look, worst-case scenario,
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you kill somebody,
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and that hangs over your head the rest of your life.
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But that is the absolute worst-case scenario.
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Just have the nurses do all the stuff you're still too chicken to do,
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which I assume is everything, and if you have a really rough admission...
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No, I was gonna say go hide in the closet again.
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- [flushing] - [Billy] Yeehaw! This is fun.
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- [man] Hey, nurse? - I'm a doctor, okay?
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The stethoscope, the beeper, a doctor, got it?
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- Relax. - I just hate it.
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I hate "darlings" and "sweethearts".
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You don't need to tell me how hard it is being a woman around here.
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You're furthering the cause by wearing a thong and hooking up in the on-call room.
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- [screeching of tires] - Word gets around.
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You talk like that, do you even know my name?
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I spend every second of my life either here or taking care of my mom,
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so, yeah, maybe I needed a little closeness.
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I'm sure you never had a quickie at the club, right?
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Or snuck some skinny, flat-butted college boy up to your sorority room.
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And my thong? I happen to think it makes my ass look good.
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And some days, I need to feel good about something here.
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And you judge me? Well, guess what?
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Word does get around, Ms. Out-For-Herself.
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So you can dump on everyone here if you want, but you will not hurt me.
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Her name's Carla, by the way.
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- [patient] Ouch. - [J.D.] Yeah.
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Hey, Champ. First night on call starts soon, huh?
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Gosh, you must be excited.
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[screams internally]
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[chuckles] Oh, about Mrs. Pratt.
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I heard you wanted to put her on the hospital's transplant list.
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I just thought I'd recommend keeping her on dialysis a little longer.
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- Maybe we'll get lucky. - No problem, sir.
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Great. Have a ball.
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On call. [chuckles]