🎲 Surprise Me

Results (4017)

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You think you're better than me?!
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I'm the white devil!
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Remember during COVID when everyone was shitting all over Asian people?
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Blaming it on you guys? That wasn't me. I didn't do that. I went to a march.
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And I... And I posted. I posted a yellow square.
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Thank you for flying Delta.
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Okay. That's our time.
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So, how are you feeling right now as we end?
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- Fine. - I wish these sessions were longer.
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Can't believe this shit's $400 an hour.
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What a fucking baby.
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What a little bitch.
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I was wondering, are they serving a meal on this flight?
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Yes, for first-class passengers.
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- Great, thanks. - Yeah.
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Oh, um, I'm sorry, sir.
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We're gonna need to check your bag.
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Are you sure? I always travel with this.
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- Leave it there. I'll take care of it. - Okay.
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It's all for you 'Cause you're my daddy
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It's all for you 'Cause you're my daddy
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'Cause you're my daddy
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I also sleep with a weighted blanket
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'cause I like to feel somebody on top of me,
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but I don't have to have hair in my mouth,
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so I sleep with a weighted blanket,
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which also helps with wet dreams.
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And by help, I mean it causes them, so...
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Weighted blankets, yeah, good for wet dreams,
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shitty for house fires, I'll tell you that.
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You know, Christina said I have great balls.
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Which really just feels like she's saying, "Your dick's not worth talking about."
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We're not supposed to be married.