🎲 Surprise Me

Results (13329)

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Whoa, I guess if I have anything to say to Derek, I should say it now.
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[shoe shuffling, squeaking]
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I have nothing to say to Derek.
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Chris! You can't go in there!
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Brian, what are you doing here? [chuckles]
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Look, there's not much time. We're from the future.
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Well, your future, our present.
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Let me stop you right there.
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I'm 100% fine with whatever this is.
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Okay, Chris, get in there and make this the flaccid-est report of your life.
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- I won't let you down. - [bell rings]
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[English teacher] Just in time, Chris. You're up.
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[Chris chuckles] Not today, I'm not.
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Hello, peers. This is my report on the book, Tom Sawyer.
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The cover shows a kid painting a fence,
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and inside it is paper, which is made from trees.
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Chris, I may have to fail you.
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Well, that's all good, 'cause the only chub in town is the insurance company.
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Quagmire. I see you're wearing a brown belt today.
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That just blew my damn mind.
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Belts are reversible, men are becoming women,
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I'm kind of getting into it, what's this world coming to?
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Evening, gentlemen. Thought I'd offer some celebratory
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popcorn shrimp for the big scratcher winners.
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Wow, no way! That's the appetizer in commercials
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most likely to fly through the air.
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Any food that's airborne on television is very special.
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I understood the shrimp to be exclusively for winners.
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I've got to find a way to have what they have.
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Okay. Suction cups, pulley system, carabiners, rope, ski mask.
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- [glass shatters] - [bat clatters]
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[hesitating] I don't understand the crossword ones.
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Well, Chris, probably time to head home.
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And congrats again on a successful, non-turgid book report.
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Please stop saying gross smart words.