🎲 Surprise Me

Results (28289)

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What's Starlight gonna think?
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Listening to us haggling over nickels.
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We're The Seven, for God's sake.
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Whether we're out there or we're in here.
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Now, what I do want to hear
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is who you saved this week.
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Let's start with you, man.
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All right, give us your phone.
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There's fuck-all security to worry about.
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In fact, they're a bunch of muppets.
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And the metal detector won't pick this up.
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Right? And what they'll probably do is take you
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through the security and then up into the boardroom.
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Sit down. Be nice, congenial.
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Then, real polite-like, tell 'em you're gonna take a fake shit.
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Go into the bog, take the bug out.
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Peel back the plastic bit to reveal the sticky side.
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Put the plastic bit in the bog. Flush it.
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Then go back into the boardroom,
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sit down-- big smiles--
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plant the bug underneath the table.
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Easy peasy Japanesey.
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Bob's your uncle. That's that.
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-That's that? That was-- that was a lot. -Yeah.
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Th-- I've-- Hold on, can you just-- can you repeat it again?
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Just a little bit slower? Because I...
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-Fuck. (exhales) -Hughie, calm down, all right?
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This is like that scene in The Matrix.
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Now, you could take the fucking red pill, right?
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Spend the rest of your life jacking off,
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crying into your chai tea
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green latte, what the fuck. Or...
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you could take the blue pill.
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Or is it the red pill? Anyway, take the other pill
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-and quit being a cunt. -Which pill do you want me to take?
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Just quit being a cunt. That's what I'm saying.
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(quietly): Fuck me. Okay.
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("Take You Down" by Daniel Pemberton playing)