🎲 Surprise Me

Results (84882)

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don't have a little guy playing polo on the lapel.
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You cut the sleeves off of all your t-shirts.
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What, so you can show off your tats? Those are really original, dude.
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I'm sorry. What tribe are you from? What? Is it an Indian tribe or?
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- Are you gonna let me in this game? - No. You're the ref.
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I don't want to ref anymore. I'd like to play, so...
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- You're an excellent ref, Charlie. - You're a very good ref.
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Yeah, I know. I'm a great ref. I'd like to play the game now.
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Are you gonna get mad? You gonna turn into the Mad Munchkin?
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Do you represent the Lollipop Guild, Charlie?
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# - He is the mad Munchkin - The little mad, mad Munchkin man #
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- Oh, okay. This is what we do? - I need to talk to you.
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# - I'm a little Munchkin man # - It's about our son!
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DENNIS: So, wait, she's sayin' this is your son?
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MAC: I don't know. Sounds like a bunch of bullshit to me, Charlie.
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I know! I know. There's, like, no way that this is possible.
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- Yeah. - Okay. Did you use birth control?
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Oh, Dee, we went to Catholic school, so...
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Okay. So you're allowed to have premarital sex
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but you're not allowed to use birth control?
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No. All right. You're twisting words here and, like, gettin' cute.
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It's been, like, 10 years since I've even seen her.
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Well, that's the weird thing. She doesn't want money
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or anything like that. She just wants me to meet him.
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Well, dude, you gotta meet the kid. I mean, you gotta find out for sure.
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I wish I could go back in time and do the right thing, you know?
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- Like be there for him? - No. Get her an abortion.
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So you're not allowed to use birth control,
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Okay. So, now you're, like, a word genius,
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and everything I say, you twist it around and make me look dumb.
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He should have at least had a say in the matter.
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Well, it's her body, and it's her decision.
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No, I'm sorry. It's not just her decision. The man should get a vote.
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- Well, ultimately it's her choice. - It is not just her choice.
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It's nobody's choice. It should be left up to God.
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No, it's not a joke! You remember Genesis, book two, verse three?