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Home » South Park » S28E03 — Sora Not Sorry

South Park

Season 28, Episode 3 — Sora Not Sorry

TMDB episode metadata

Show: South Park

Episode title: Sora Not Sorry

Air date: November 12, 2025

Top billed cast: Trey Parker, Matt Stone, Mona Marshall, Jennifer Howell

Butters' Al revenge plan backfires, igniting an epidemic of fake videos at school that leaves Detective Harris struggling to tell fantasy from reality.

Source: TMDB

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[theme music]

music theme theme-music

↓

- ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park ♪

goin park south south-park

↓

♪ Gonna have myself a time

↓

- ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪

faces friendly friendly-faces

↓

♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪

folks humble humble-folks temptation

↓

- ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park ♪

goin park south south-park

↓

♪ Gonna leave my woes behind ♪

behind woes woes-behind

↓

- ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪

ample ample-parking night parking

↓

♪ People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor" ♪

howdy howdy-neighbor neighbor spouting spouting-howdy spouting-howdy-neighbor

↓

- ♪ I'm headin' on down to South Park ♪

headin park south south-park

↓

♪ Gonna see if I can't unwind ♪

unwind

↓

- ♪ [mumbling] ♪

mumbling

↓

- ♪ Come on down to South Park ♪

park south south-park

↓

♪ And meet some friends of mine ♪

friends meet

↓

[knocking on door]

door knocking

↓

- Hello, sir. My name is Red,

name

↓

and I go to South Park Elementary.

elementary park park-elementary south south-park south-park-elementary

↓

Would you like to sign my petition?

sign

↓

- Why sure, little girl.

girl

↓

What's your petition for?

↓

- It's to try and get everyone to smell my farts.

farts smell

↓

[farts loudly]

farts loudly

↓

- Whoa, whoa, whoa! What's going on here?

whoa whoa-whoa whoa-whoa-whoa

↓

- Oh, wow, Santa Claus!

claus santa santa-claus

↓

- You've been a bad girl, Red,

girl

↓

so I'm gonna piss in your face now.

face piss

↓

- Oh, no, you better not, Santa!

santa

↓

- Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!

↓

- Ew! - Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!

↓

- [gurgling]

gurgling

↓

- [laughs] See?

laughs

↓

And then Santa Claus pisses in her face!

claus face pisses santa santa-claus

↓

SANTA: There, now you smell like Santa's piss.

piss santa santas smell

↓

- Wow, that looks pretty real.

real

↓

- Hey, fellas!

fellas

↓

Fellas, check this out!

check fellas

↓

Me and Kenny made a generative AI video

kenny video

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of Red getting pissed on by Santa Claus.

claus pissed santa santa-claus

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SANTA: Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! RED: [gurgling]

gurgling santa

↓

- Aw, dude.

↓

- It's really easy, you can make the videos online.

easy online videos

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We made one of Red eating dog shit,

eating

↓

and one of Red barfing up tampons.

tampons

↓

- Dude, that's not cool.

cool

↓

- Yeah, why would you guys do this to her?

↓

- 'Cause Red's a bitch! She totally used me.

bitch reds used

↓

- [muffled speech]

muffled muffled-speech speech

↓

- Red pretended she liked me to get me to buy her a Labubu.

labubu liked pretended

↓

That bitch deserves it.

bitch deserves

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- You shouldn't be using AI to make revenge porn, Butters.

butters porn revenge using

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That's gonna totally backfire.

↓

- Ah, what's gonna happen?

happen

↓

SANTA: Ho, ho, ho, ho. RED: [gurgling]

gurgling santa

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That little shit! SANTA: Ho, ho, ho, ho!

santa

↓

- That little shit!

↓

- It's already all over the school.

school

↓

Butters is trying to humiliate you.

butters humiliate

↓

- What the hell did I do to him?

↓

- Well, you did kind of use him.

↓

- I didn't use him.

↓

He wanted to buy me a Labubu.

labubu wanted

↓

- You should go tell the principal, Red.

principal

↓

They said if anyone made these kind of videos

videos

↓

of other students, they'd call the police.

police students theyd

↓

- I don't need to tell the principal.

principal

↓

There's gonna be a big assembly this afternoon.

afternoon assembly

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I'll get Butters back myself.

butters

↓

[indistinct chatter]

chatter indistinct indistinct-chatter

↓

- All right, everyone, listen up.

↓

As you know, most of your brains have been sucked void

brains sucked void

↓

of common sense by the woke radical left.

common common-sense left radical sense woke

↓

And so today's topic is about having some pride

having pride todays topic

↓

in America's heritage!

americas heritage

↓

Pay attention.

attention

↓

[militaristic music playing]

music music-playing playing

↓

ANNOUNCER: America.

america announcer

↓

It was built on a dream.

built dream

↓

An idea that almost all people should be free.

free idea

↓

When our forefathers first came to this great nation,

nation

↓

they--[static]--in the-- [static]--Mayflower--

mayflower static

↓

Plymouth--

plymouth

↓

- ♪ Totoro, Totoro

totoro

↓

♪ Totoro, Totoro

totoro

↓

♪ ♪

↓

- Well, hey, everybody!

everybody

↓

It's me, Butters.

butters

↓

[upbeat music playing]

music music-playing playing upbeat upbeat-music upbeat-music-playing

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And this is my friend, Totoro.

friend totoro

↓

And you know what I'm gonna do?

↓

I'm gonna fuck him.

fuck

↓

Yep, that's right, I'm Butters,

butters

↓

and I'm gonna have sex with Totoro right now.

totoro

↓

- Oh! Oh.

↓

[groans]

groans

↓

[indistinct chatter]

chatter indistinct indistinct-chatter

↓

- Whoa!

whoa

↓

Oh, you bitch!

bitch

↓

- What the hell is this?

↓

- I told him.

↓

♪

↓

[dramatic music]

dramatic dramatic-music music

↓

- All right, Mrs. Cartman, let me get this straight.

cartman straight

↓

You say the government... took your child?

child government

↓

- Eric was very sick.

eric sick

↓

The doctor said he only had

doctor

↓

another six or seven weeks to live.

another live seven weeks

↓

And these people said they could help him

↓

if they took him to Washington.

washington

↓

- And they didn't invite you to go alone?

alone invite

↓

Seems a little farfetched.

seems

↓

- It was all so confusing.

confusing

↓

They said it was about national security.

national national-security security

↓

I've been getting updates and emails,

emails updates

↓

but I don't even know what to believe anymore.

anymore believe

↓

- Detective Harris, sir,

detective harris

↓

we need to get down to the school right away.

school

↓

- What's the matter?

matter

↓

- There's a young boy there, sir.

young

↓

Appears he's been molested by Totoro.

appears molested totoro

↓

- Holy shit! Sorry, Mrs. Cartman.

cartman holy

↓

We'll look into it for you when we can.

↓

- But what about Eric?

eric

↓

[indistinct police radio chatter]

chatter indistinct police radio radio-chatter

↓

- All right, kid, you wanna tell me what happened?

happened

↓

- I don't know nuttin'!

↓

- We've seen the video, kid.

seen video

↓

How long have you and Totoro been sexually active?

active sexually sexually-active totoro

↓

- What?

↓

I don't know nuttin'!

↓

- Look, that forest-dwelling piece of shit

forest piece

↓

is just gonna keep doing this to kids

kids

↓

unless you talk to us.

↓

I wanna know where you met Totoro,

totoro

↓

and I want a description of his penis.

description penis

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- Sir, you better come take a look at this.

↓

- What is it?

↓

- There's another young student here at this school

another school student young

↓

that appears to have just been raped by Popeye.

appears popeye raped

↓

- Popeye? That son of a bitch!

bitch popeye

↓

- I don't know nuttin'!

↓

POPEYE: Huh, yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck.

popeye yuck yuck-yuck yuck-yuck-yuck

↓

Oh-ho, whoa! Yuck...

whoa yuck

↓

- Jesus Christ.

christ jesus jesus-christ

↓

POPEYE: Yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck, yuck, oh...

popeye yuck yuck-yuck yuck-yuck-yuck

↓

- Oh, my God! What the hell is going on here?

↓

- We think Totoro and Popeye might somehow

might popeye totoro

↓

be working together, sir.

working

↓

- This all has to be connected.

connected

↓

A string of rapes, the missing Cartman boy--

cartman missing string

↓

South Park's going to shit right before our eyes.

eyes parks south south-parks

↓

- Sir?

↓

- There's something very wrong going on here, Mitch,

mitch

↓

and I'm gonna find out what.

↓

[machinery whirring, clanking, beeping]

beeping clanking machinery whirring

↓

- Boss,

boss

↓

please don't be mad at me.

↓

Everything I did...

↓

I did for you.

↓

- You were manipulating me.

manipulating

↓

This whole time, you've been trying to get me

whole

↓

to get rid of Satan's baby.

baby satans

↓

- Yes, because I know you want to get rid of the baby, boss.

baby boss

↓

[chair scrapes]

chair

↓

I was just trying to help you.

↓

I would do anything for you.

↓

You...

↓

are the greatest boss

boss greatest

↓

I ever had.

↓

And I just want you to be happy.

happy

↓

- Of course I don't want the baby,

baby course

↓

but everyone's so excited.

everyones excited

↓

I can't get out of it.

↓

- I have a guy, boss.

boss

↓

[sinister music]

music sinister sinister-music

↓

He's in Colorado right now.

colorado

↓

He is an expert in all of this.

expert

↓

♪

↓

- Nobody's here to embarrass you, all right son?

embarrass nobodys

↓

We just wanna know what happened between you and Popeye.

happened popeye

↓

- [muffled speech]

muffled muffled-speech speech

↓

- You can't tell 'em the girls did it to you

girls

↓

'cause you helped me or they're gonna know

helped

↓

we did it to them first!

↓

We don't know nothing!

↓

- Did Totoro tell you to say that?

totoro

↓

You don't need to protect these scumbags.

protect

↓

- Sir, there's a Studio Ghibli here

ghibli studio studio-ghibli

↓

that wants to talk to the kid.

wants

↓

- What's s Studio Ghibli?

ghibli studio studio-ghibli

↓

- Some Japanese guys, say they represent Totoro.

japanese represent totoro

↓

- You!

↓

You fuck Totoro!

fuck totoro

↓

- Totoro is Studio Ghibli IP!

ghibli studio studio-ghibli totoro

↓

- Ah, Totoro's already got some lawyers, huh?

lawyers

↓

- It takes hundreds of artists

artists hundreds takes

↓

three years to make Totoro!

three three-years totoro years

↓

And in two minutes

minutes

↓

you spit out you shit

spit

↓

and fuck Totoro!

fuck totoro

↓

- Studio Ghibli no sakuhin!

ghibli studio studio-ghibli

↓

- What?

↓

- [muffled speech]

muffled muffled-speech speech

↓

- All right, I can't understand a word anyone here is saying.

word

↓

- You stop!

↓

This is a "shi-shu" and "deshishto!"

↓

- "Shi-shu" and "deshishto!"

↓

- Mitch, get 'em outta here!

mitch outta

↓

- Shimatta!

↓

Totoro no meiyo ga kegasareta!

totoro

↓

- You cannot just do whatever you want

cannot

↓

with someone else's IP!

elses

↓

- Yo, what's up, Mom? It's your boy, Eric,

eric

↓

live from Washington, D.C. Day one, baby.

baby live washington

↓

Look, that's a big pointy thing--

pointy

↓

uh, the Washington Monument.

monument washington

↓

Whole reflection pool's right there.

pools reflection whole

↓

It's like a giant bathtub, but with ducks.

bathtub ducks giant

↓

Everything's great. Promise.

everythings promise

↓

Hey, Mom, it's me. Just want you to know

↓

I am totally safe and in no danger whatsoever.

danger safe whatsoever

↓

Dude, there's a castle at the end of the street

castle street

↓

and everyone smells like popcorn.

popcorn smells

↓

This is unreal, forever.

forever

↓

Just want to let everyone know I'm safe and sound.

safe sound

↓

No, kitty, that's my pot pie!

kitty

↓

I love Cheesy Poofs and--

cheesy cheesy-poofs love love-cheesy love-cheesy-poofs poofs

↓

Rawr! Respect my authority! Bye!

authority respect

↓

- Oh, Eric,

eric

↓

Mommy misses you.

misses mommy

↓

[dramatic music]

dramatic dramatic-music music

↓

- "A boy from South Park

park south south-park

↓

"tells his mom he's doing good

tells

↓

and he'll be home soon."

home

↓

- Hey, dude, fuck you.

fuck

↓

That is totally not cool, what you're doing.

cool

↓

[eerie tone]

eerie tone

↓

- "The boy is fat

↓

and authoritative."

↓

- Hey, Mom, things are good here.

↓

I love Cheesy Poofs!

cheesy cheesy-poofs love love-cheesy love-cheesy-poofs poofs

↓

I'm just stoked to be feeling better,

feeling stoked

↓

and I'll be home soon. Respect my authority!

authority home respect

↓

Bro, everyone's gonna know that's not really me.

everyones

↓

I haven't even talked about Cheesy Poofs

cheesy cheesy-poofs poofs talked

↓

in, like, five years.

five five-years years

↓

- You shut up!

↓

We'll be going to Washington soon,

washington

↓

and then you're gonna help me

↓

stop the antichrist from being born.

antichrist born

↓

And we're gonna save the world.

save world

↓

- Not for free, dude!

free

↓

If you wanna use me, then you gotta pay a motherfucker.

motherfucker

↓

You don't get to make me go do a bunch of weird shit

bunch weird

↓

that I would normally never do.

normally

↓

- It's the world you live in, kid.

live world

↓

Anyone can make you do anything they want.

↓

- No, kitty, that's my authority!

authority kitty

↓

Pot pie!

↓

[stately music]

music

↓

♪

↓

- I word really hard. You know?

hard word

↓

I just feel like I deserve to relax a bit, guy.

deserve relax

↓

- Of course you do, boss.

boss course

↓

This baby is too much for you.

baby

↓

- I tried abortion clinics, Plan B,

abortion clinics plan tried

↓

but this baby just won't die!

baby

↓

- And that is how my guy in Colorado can help us, boss.

boss colorado

↓

Only he can stop the antichrist.

antichrist

↓

If we bring him here, to Washington, then we can--

bring washington

↓

- What are you guys doing?

↓

TRUMP: Hey, relax, guy!

relax trump

↓

We're having an important meeting!

having meeting

↓

- What are you talking about?

↓

- It's government stuff, Satan.

government satan stuff

↓

- OK, so I guess I'm going to the pediatrician

↓

by myself again.

↓

- Hey, relax, guy!

relax

↓

We have to do this.

↓

- You're such a piece of shit.

piece

↓

- You see? Always bitching at me.

bitching

↓

I should be treated better than that.

treated

↓

- Yes, boss, you should.

boss

↓

That's why you need to trust me.

trust

↓

Nobody feels for you the way that I do.

feels nobody

↓

Nobody, boss.

boss nobody

↓

[laughter and shouting]

laughter shouting

↓

- Hey, Red, can we talk to you?

↓

- Sure, Kyle.

kyle

↓

- I'm here to help Butters try to call a truce.

butters truce

↓

- What kind of truce?

truce

↓

- It's just all this Sora stuff is kinda getting out of hand.

hand kinda sora stuff

↓

I know Butters started it,

butters started

↓

so then you guys made one of him,

↓

but then you guys made one of Kenny,

kenny

↓

and I just think we all need to respect each other more.

respect

↓

- You know what? You're right, Kyle.

kyle

↓

You're really a smart guy.

smart

↓

- Thanks, Red. I feel like a smart guy.

smart thanks

↓

It's 'cause I'm a Jew.

↓

- Excuse me, is your name Kyle?

excuse kyle name

↓

- Oh, wow, it's Droopy Dog!

droopy

↓

- Hey, Droopy Dog. Yeah, I'm Kyle.

droopy kyle

↓

- You know what?

↓

I'm gonna take a shit in your mouth.

mouth

↓

- Oh, no, Droopy Dog, don't shit in my mouth!

droopy mouth

↓

Bad dog!

↓

- Here it comes.

comes

↓

[farting] - [groaning]

farting groaning

↓

- You like that, you dumb Jew?

dumb

↓

[farting] - [Kyle groaning]

farting groaning kyle

↓

- Dude, what the hell? - You see?

↓

The girls did one about you now.

girls

↓

- What the hell did I do?

↓

- It don't matter, I told you!

matter

↓

Red's just a bitch.

bitch reds

↓

- You like that hot shit in your Jew mouth?

mouth

↓

- I mean, you got to admit it's pretty impressive.

admit impressive

↓

It looks really real.

real

↓

- It's not impressive! It's fucked up.

fucked impressive

↓

How is this even legal?

legal

↓

- Nothing's sacred, Kyle.

kyle nothings sacred

↓

All you can do is fight fire with fire.

fight fire

↓

- Well, then let's see how Red likes it

likes

↓

when we make one of her and Bluey.

bluey

↓

- Yeah!

↓

[ominous music]

music ominous ominous-music

↓

- We've had 12 new cases in the past 14 hours,

cases hours past

↓

and you're telling me we can't get one kid to testify?

telling testify

↓

- None of the kids will talk, sir.

kids

↓

- We're running out of time here, people.

running

↓

These predators are all gonna start lawyering up

predators start

↓

like Totoro did.

totoro

↓

- We're not lawyer!

lawyer

↓

Studio Ghibli make Totoro

ghibli studio studio-ghibli totoro

↓

with pencil and paint,

paint pencil

↓

not by typing sentence on stupid Sora app!

sentence sora stupid typing

↓

- Nobody can understand anything you're saying,

nobody

↓

so I don't know what to tell you, buddy.

buddy

↓

- We're just getting no cooperation.

cooperation

↓

Every kid we interview, we get the same thing.

interview

↓

"That's not me. Someone else did that."

↓

- That's the South Park we're living in, Mitch.

living mitch park south south-park

↓

Kids won't talk to a cop,

kids

↓

but they'll do anything Rocky and Bullwinkle tell 'em to do.

rocky

↓

[snaps] That's it.

snaps

↓

We gotta go undercover as a couple of these predators

couple predators undercover

↓

and gain a little kid's trust.

gain kids trust

↓

[keyboard clacking]

clacking keyboard keyboard-clacking

↓

[phone rings]

phone phone-rings rings

↓

- Yeah. What's going on?

↓

- Everything is OK.

↓

We have Trump's approval now.

approval trumps

↓

- The president knows of our plans?

knows plans president

↓

VANCE: Yes.

vance

↓

He and I are on the same page.

page

↓

- What's he say?

↓

- But we cannot proceed just yet.

cannot proceed

↓

Can you keep the child on ice a little longer?

child longer

↓

- No problem--with Sora 2,

problem sora

↓

I can make the South Park kid do just about anything.

park south south-park

↓

- Dude, fuck you.

fuck

↓

That is so lame.

lame

↓

[Foreigner's "I Want to Know What Love Is"]

foreigners love

↓

♪ ♪

↓

- But boss, what about Satan?

boss satan

↓

♪ ♪

↓

- ♪ I want to know what love is ♪

love

↓

♪ ♪

↓

- Oh, boss, it's so big.

boss

↓

♪ ♪

↓

- ♪ I want to feel what love is ♪

love

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ I know you can show me ♪

↓

- Oh, boss!

boss

↓

Boss!

boss

↓

Yes, boss!

boss

↓

Yes, boss!

boss

↓

[crickets chirping]

chirping crickets

↓

- How much longer we gotta do this shit, Mitch?

longer mitch

↓

You remember when things made sense?

remember sense

↓

You put your time in. You did the work.

↓

But now this stuff we're seeing,

seeing stuff

↓

it's like someone shook the snow globe and said,

globe shook snow

↓

"Here you go, make sense of this."

sense

↓

- I don't understand it much either, sir.

↓

Maybe we're just too old.

↓

- We used to go after normal criminals.

criminals normal used

↓

But now the criminals have faces that can just start

criminals faces start

↓

turning into oranges that eat other oranges.

oranges turning

↓

That's when you realize

realize

↓

maybe the job doesn't need you anymore.

anymore

↓

- Hey, look. Kid's coming out.

coming kids

↓

- Let's do this.

↓

Hey there, little girl. It's Rocky and Bullwinkle.

girl rocky

↓

You looking for a good time?

looking

↓

[dramatic musical sting]

dramatic musical sting

↓

[dramatic music]

dramatic dramatic-music music

↓

- The South Park Police Department had to go undercover

department park police south south-park undercover

↓

in order to finally get to the truth in this case.

case finally order truth

↓

And what the evidence will show

evidence

↓

is that an innocent girl was humiliated

girl humiliated innocent

↓

by the actions of these boys.

actions boys

↓

All right, little girl, you say the boys just used you.

boys girl used

↓

Is that right?

↓

- That's right.

↓

They made me do things I would normally never do.

normally

↓

- Exactly what kinds of things?

kinds

↓

- They made me go to the bathroom

bathroom

↓

in a very, very bad place.

place

↓

- And did the suspects offer you

offer suspects

↓

any kind of compensation?

compensation

↓

- I didn't make one cent!

cent

↓

[crowd gasping]

crowd crowd-gasping gasping

↓

- What the hell is going on?

↓

They're turning the kids into the victims?

kids turning victims

↓

This whole thing stinks!

stinks whole

↓

Why don't you go fuck yourself, Bluey?

bluey fuck

↓

[crowd gasping] [gavel banging]

banging crowd crowd-gasping gasping gavel

↓

- Order! Order!

order

↓

- My client has been misrepresented,

client

↓

and these boys are going to jail!

boys jail

↓

- It wasn't their fault, all right?

fault

↓

It's all my fault!

fault

↓

This all started with me,

started

↓

because my heart was broken.

broken heart

↓

I made the first videos using Sora 2.

sora using videos

↓

I saw the ones Eric Cartman made

cartman eric eric-cartman ones

↓

to get out of going to school, and I thought

school

↓

I could make these about Red 'cause the bitch deserves it.

bitch deserves

↓

But it was just me.

↓

- Wait, you're saying that the Eric Cartman videos

cartman eric eric-cartman videos

↓

are all being created by someone

created

↓

to distort the truth?

truth

↓

That's gotta be Totoro!

totoro

↓

Trace the IP address, and let's get the son of a bitch!

address bitch trace

↓

[sirens wailing] [tires squeal]

sirens sirens-wailing squeal tires tires-squeal wailing

↓

[indistinct radio chatter]

chatter indistinct indistinct-radio indistinct-radio-chatter radio radio-chatter

↓

- Ah!

↓

[keyboard clacking]

clacking keyboard keyboard-clacking

↓

- Freeze!

freeze

↓

- We got the kid, sir.

↓

- You're making a big mistake.

mistake

↓

I have powerful connections.

connections powerful

↓

- Oh, I know you do.

↓

But no magical Catbus is gonna

magical

↓

whisk you away from justice this time.

justice

↓

- Mom!

↓

- Oh, Eric, you're safe!

eric safe

↓

- How the hell did it take you this long

↓

to figure out those videos of me were fake?

fake figure videos

↓

- Oh, well, they looked so real, sweetie.

looked real sweetie

↓

- When is the last time I even ate a pot pie, you dumb bitch?

bitch dumb dumb-bitch

↓

- Get him out of here.

↓

Lock him up with the Japanese lawyers.

japanese lawyers lock

↓

Well, Mitch, looks like we just busted a huge community

busted community huge mitch

↓

of online rapists called Sora 2.

called online sora

↓

- Great job, sir.

↓

- Detective Harris, you better take a look at this.

detective harris

↓

This guy didn't just make videos.

videos

↓

He also has surveillance equipment

equipment surveillance

↓

all over the White House.

house white white-house

↓

- White House? - Yeah.

house white white-house

↓

He's got this video of the president

president video

↓

in the Lincoln Bedroom.

bedroom lincoln

↓

VANCE: Oh, boss!

boss vance

↓

Boss!

boss

↓

- Jesus Christ. VANCE: Yes, boss!

boss christ jesus jesus-christ vance

↓

Yes, boss!

boss

↓

- Oh, my God, what the hell is going on here?

↓

- Oh, boy.

↓

When Fox News sees this, they are not gonna be happy.

happy news sees

↓

ANNOUNCER: This is a... Fox News...

announcer news

↓

special alert.

alert special

↓

- Some, uh, very troubling news from the White House today.

house news today troubling white white-house

↓

Apparently, a security camera in the Lincoln Bedroom

apparently bedroom camera lincoln security

↓

has caught President Trump having...relations

caught having president president-trump relations trump

↓

with Vice President Vance.

president vance vice vice-president

↓

Fox News is live at the White House.

house live news white white-house

↓

- Yeah, hey.

↓

Definitely disheartening news here.

news

↓

Why the president would do this to Satan

president satan

↓

with a baby on the way, we don't know.

baby

↓

Guess it's anyone's guess why--

anyones

↓

- Sorry, sorry, we gotta interrupt you there.

interrupt

↓

Uh, we just got word that the president is

president word

↓

calling in to "Fox & Friends."

calling friends

↓

Are you there, sir?

↓

TRUMP: Hello? Hi? Hello?

trump

↓

- Yes. Mr. President, what is going on?

president

↓

TRUMP: Oh, we're doing some great things here.

trump

↓

More than Sleepy Joe Biden ever did!

sleepy

↓

Everything's great!

everythings

↓

- Well, what about you and the vice president?

president vice vice-president

↓

TRUMP: Hey, relax, guy!

relax trump

↓

- We're trying to relax, sir,

relax

↓

but we've all seen the security footage.

footage security seen

↓

TRUMP: No, that's fake!

fake trump

↓

That's all--it's all Sora 2.

sora

↓

- It's fake?

fake

↓

TRUMP: Yeah, guy, that's all Sora 2!

sora trump

↓

That's all fake!

fake

↓

- Oh, it's fake! Oh, thank God!

fake

↓

- Of course it was fake. How could we have doubted it?

course doubted fake

↓

[dramatic musical sting]

dramatic musical sting

↓

ANNOUNCER: This is a Fox News fake news alert.

alert announcer fake fake-news news

↓

- Totally fake news today

fake fake-news news today

↓

as the president did not have sex with the vice president.

president vice vice-president

↓

- You swear on everything that video was fake.

fake swear video

↓

- Of course it's fake, Satan!

course fake satan

↓

- OK, 'cause it looks really real.

real

↓

- Satan, I swear on the baby.

baby satan swear

↓

I wouldn't do that to you.

↓

Relax, guy.

relax

↓

- OK. - Great.

↓

Well, I gotta go get a snack.

snack

↓

You want anything from downstairs?

downstairs

↓

- No, I'm good.

↓

- All right, what's the situation?

situation

↓

- The detective in Colorado is very stubborn, boss.

boss colorado detective stubborn

↓

He will not give us Peter Thiel.

peter peter-thiel thiel

↓

- How can he not hand him over?

hand

↓

I'm the president!

president

↓

- Don't worry, boss.

boss worry

↓

We will not let that town get in the way

town

↓

of our plans together.

plans

↓

[theme music]

music theme theme-music

↓

♪ ♪