♥ Saved GIFs

Loading…

View all favorites →

Home » Silicon Valley » S05E03 — Chief Operating Officer

Silicon Valley

Season 5, Episode 3 — Chief Operating Officer

TMDB episode metadata

Show: Silicon Valley

Episode title: Chief Operating Officer

Air date: April 08, 2018

Director: Jamie Babbit

Top billed cast: Thomas Middleditch, Zach Woods, Kumail Nanjiani, Martin Starr, Amanda Crew, Matt Ross

Encouraged by Jared to strike up a friendship with Dana, a like-minded CEO, Richard instead finds himself charmed by Dana's COO, who challenges his loyalty to Gilfoyle. Facing limited housing options thanks to his impulse purchase, Dinesh searches for a new roommate.

Source: TMDB

↓

BERTRAM GILFOYLE: Something's wrong with your "frunk".

somethings

↓

It's all "frucked" up.

↓

♪ ♪

↓

I've instituted an operation to safeguard our interests.

interests operation

↓

Uh, Gavin Belson's office, please.

office

↓

RICHARD HENDRICKS: You wanted me to unite the teams?

richard teams unite wanted

↓

They are united against me.

united

↓

If I'm not inspirational enough for you, then there's the door.

door inspirational

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ -JUDGE COULTER: I will approve you

approve judge

↓

as the soul beneficiary

soul

↓

and the official executor of Mr. Bachman's estate.

estate official

↓

This is my incubator now.

↓

You can't just kick us out, Jian-Yang.

kick yang

↓

Richard: Wait a second.

richard second

↓

Richard: Wait a second.

richard second

↓

So, the guy who just kicked me out of my house

house kicked

↓

So, the guy who just kicked me out of my house

house kicked

↓

now owns 10% of my company?

company owns

↓

now owns 10% of my company?

company owns

↓

Technically, he kicked you out of his house.

house kicked technically

↓

Technically, he kicked you out of his house.

house kicked technically

↓

And he inherited all of Mr. Bachman's assets

assets

↓

And he inherited all of Mr. Bachman's assets

assets

↓

including his 10% of Pied Piper.

including piper

↓

including his 10% of Pied Piper.

including piper

↓

By faking his death. Allegedly!

allegedly death faking

↓

By faking his death. Allegedly!

allegedly death faking

↓

Look, Richie.

richie

↓

Look, Richie.

richie

↓

You didn't actually lose anything here, okay?

lose

↓

You didn't actually lose anything here, okay?

lose

↓

Bachman is the aggrieved party,

party

↓

Bachman is the aggrieved party,

party

↓

and if he is actually still alive,

alive

↓

and if he is actually still alive,

alive

↓

he'll get his 10% back when he shows up.

shows

↓

he'll get his 10% back when he shows up.

shows

↓

In the meantime, is it really any worse

meantime worse

↓

In the meantime, is it really any worse

meantime worse

↓

if it belongs to this Yang guy?

belongs yang

↓

if it belongs to this Yang guy?

belongs yang

↓

No, I guess not.

↓

No, I guess not.

↓

So what's your real beef here then, huh, Richie?

beef real richie

↓

So what's your real beef here then, huh, Richie?

beef real richie

↓

You got something against him?

↓

You got something against him?

↓

You don't have, like, a bias against Asians, do you?

asians

↓

You don't have, like, a bias against Asians, do you?

asians

↓

Richard? No, I don't.

richard

↓

Richard? No, I don't.

richard

↓

No, I just don't like being kicked out of my house.

house kicked

↓

No, I just don't like being kicked out of my house.

house kicked

↓

By a...?

↓

By a...?

↓

N-Nothing. By no one!

↓

N-Nothing. By no one!

↓

By any race!

race

↓

By any race!

race

↓

Yeah, I'm hearing something different.

hearing

↓

Yeah, I'm hearing something different.

hearing

↓

Jared: You'd tell me if you harbored

jared

↓

Jared: You'd tell me if you harbored

jared

↓

nativist feelings, wouldn't you? Richard: Yes.

feelings richard

↓

nativist feelings, wouldn't you? Richard: Yes.

feelings richard

↓

Dana?

dana

↓

Dana?

dana

↓

Oh, hey.

↓

Oh, hey.

↓

Jared: Hey!

jared

↓

Jared: Hey!

jared

↓

Dana, this is Richard Hendricks.

dana richard

↓

Dana, this is Richard Hendricks.

dana richard

↓

He's the CEO of Pied Piper.

piper

↓

He's the CEO of Pied Piper.

piper

↓

And, Richard,

richard

↓

And, Richard,

richard

↓

this is Dana, CEO of Quiver. Oh, yeah.

dana quiver

↓

this is Dana, CEO of Quiver. Oh, yeah.

dana quiver

↓

Yeah, I hear you guys are giving Akami a run for their money.

giving money

↓

Yeah, I hear you guys are giving Akami a run for their money.

giving money

↓

Oh, yeah.

↓

Oh, yeah.

↓

Dana and I kept finding ourselves

dana finding

↓

Dana and I kept finding ourselves

dana finding

↓

on the same bathroom schedule back at Hooli.

bathroom schedule

↓

on the same bathroom schedule back at Hooli.

bathroom schedule

↓

You know, men and their cycles.

↓

You know, men and their cycles.

↓

Jared: You know what?

jared

↓

Jared: You know what?

jared

↓

You guys should get a meal together.

meal

↓

You guys should get a meal together.

meal

↓

Jared: Right? You're-- you're kindred spirits.

jared spirits

↓

Jared: Right? You're-- you're kindred spirits.

jared spirits

↓

You're both CEOs. You have a lot in common.

common

↓

You're both CEOs. You have a lot in common.

common

↓

Sure, yeah. Maybe. Yep.

↓

Sure, yeah. Maybe. Yep.

↓

Well, Richard, you're free tomorrow night.

free night richard tomorrow tomorrow-night

↓

Well, Richard, you're free tomorrow night.

free night richard tomorrow tomorrow-night

↓

But I'm not.

↓

But I'm not.

↓

I have a big party at my house.

house party

↓

I have a big party at my house.

house party

↓

A lot of people I don't know.

↓

A lot of people I don't know.

↓

So, see ya!

↓

So, see ya!

↓

What was that?

↓

What was that?

↓

I don't need you to make friends for me.

friends

↓

I don't need you to make friends for me.

friends

↓

Oh, I just think you could benefit

benefit

↓

Oh, I just think you could benefit

benefit

↓

from a friendship with someone like Dana,

dana friendship

↓

from a friendship with someone like Dana,

dana friendship

↓

who's so much like yourself.

↓

who's so much like yourself.

↓

Like me? You think that guy's like me?

↓

Like me? You think that guy's like me?

↓

I just thought of something.

↓

I just thought of something.

↓

Do you guys want to come to my party?

party

↓

Do you guys want to come to my party?

party

↓

Dana, that's so gracious of you.

dana gracious

↓

Dana, that's so gracious of you.

dana gracious

↓

That would be delightful.

delightful

↓

That would be delightful.

delightful

↓

Okay, bye.

↓

Okay, bye.

↓

Mm-kay.

↓

Mm-kay.

↓

You don't see it?

↓

You don't see it?

↓

It's uncanny.

uncanny

↓

It's uncanny.

uncanny

↓

Look at this. This is what they're asking

asking

↓

Look at this. This is what they're asking

asking

↓

for a one-bedroom apartment in Menlo Park.

apartment bedroom park

↓

for a one-bedroom apartment in Menlo Park.

apartment bedroom park

↓

Oh.

↓

Oh.

↓

What?

↓

What?

↓

Well, I can comfortably afford

afford

↓

Well, I can comfortably afford

afford

↓

my new one-bedroom apartment.

apartment bedroom

↓

my new one-bedroom apartment.

apartment bedroom

↓

You and I make the same amount of money.

amount money

↓

You and I make the same amount of money.

amount money

↓

I'm just wondering, what is the difference?

difference wondering

↓

I'm just wondering, what is the difference?

difference wondering

↓

Could it be that I didn't spend all my money

money spend

↓

Could it be that I didn't spend all my money

money spend

↓

on an absurdly over

↓

on an absurdly over

↓

Richard: Gilfoyle!

richard

↓

Richard: Gilfoyle!

richard

↓

So kind of you to join us.

join

↓

So kind of you to join us.

join

↓

You're welcome.

welcome

↓

You're welcome.

welcome

↓

Yeah! Uh, well, it's, uh, 2:00 PM.

↓

Yeah! Uh, well, it's, uh, 2:00 PM.

↓

So, fourth day in a row you missed the stand-up meeting.

fourth meeting missed stand

↓

So, fourth day in a row you missed the stand-up meeting.

fourth meeting missed stand

↓

Correct.

correct

↓

Correct.

correct

↓

Maybe you should hold it later.

↓

Maybe you should hold it later.

↓

Okay, 'cause we literally moved it

moved

↓

Okay, 'cause we literally moved it

moved

↓

from 9:00 to 11:00 to accommodate you.

accommodate

↓

from 9:00 to 11:00 to accommodate you.

accommodate

↓

So do you mind telling us when you feel like you can make it in?

mind mind-telling telling

↓

So do you mind telling us when you feel like you can make it in?

mind mind-telling telling

↓

Sure. Whenever you hold the meeting,

meeting

↓

Sure. Whenever you hold the meeting,

meeting

↓

I'll be in an hour after that.

hour

↓

I'll be in an hour after that.

hour

↓

Richard: What the fuck was that?

fuck richard

↓

Richard: What the fuck was that?

fuck richard

↓

Uh, that's the song "You Suffer" by Napalm Death.

death song suffer

↓

Uh, that's the song "You Suffer" by Napalm Death.

death song suffer

↓

Oh, yeah? That's-- that's a whole song? That's like a second.

second song whole

↓

Oh, yeah? That's-- that's a whole song? That's like a second.

second song whole

↓

It's an alert.

alert

↓

It's an alert.

alert

↓

Whenever the price of Bitcoin dips below a certain value,

certain price value

↓

Whenever the price of Bitcoin dips below a certain value,

certain price value

↓

it's no longer efficient to mine.

efficient longer

↓

it's no longer efficient to mine.

efficient longer

↓

When it comes back up, it is.

comes

↓

When it comes back up, it is.

comes

↓

So, I need to know when it breaks that threshold,

breaks

↓

So, I need to know when it breaks that threshold,

breaks

↓

so that I can remotely toggle my rig at home.

home remotely

↓

so that I can remotely toggle my rig at home.

home remotely

↓

Okay. Any idea how often that might happen?

happen idea might might-happen often

↓

Okay. Any idea how often that might happen?

happen idea might might-happen often

↓

Bitcoin is very volatile.

↓

Bitcoin is very volatile.

↓

So...

↓

So...

↓

That's just so loud.

loud

↓

That's just so loud.

loud

↓

A lot. Good. Alright, well...

alright

↓

A lot. Good. Alright, well...

alright

↓

maybe turn it down or something?

↓

maybe turn it down or something?

↓

Richard: Oh, fuck.

fuck richard

↓

Richard: Oh, fuck.

fuck richard

↓

What's up? You guys working hard or hardly working?

hard hardly working working-hard

↓

What's up? You guys working hard or hardly working?

hard hardly working working-hard

↓

'Sup?

↓

'Sup?

↓

Hey, buds. How's it going?

buds

↓

Hey, buds. How's it going?

buds

↓

Man, these Bay Area rents, huh?

area

↓

Man, these Bay Area rents, huh?

area

↓

High AF.

↓

High AF.

↓

How's a guy supposed to live by himself,

live supposed

↓

How's a guy supposed to live by himself,

live supposed

↓

or lady, by herself?

lady

↓

or lady, by herself?

lady

↓

Especially on an everyman coder's salary, you feel me?

especially salary

↓

Especially on an everyman coder's salary, you feel me?

especially salary

↓

Are you offering us a cost of living raise? Nope!

cost living nope offering raise

↓

Are you offering us a cost of living raise? Nope!

cost living nope offering raise

↓

Not at all. Even better.

↓

Not at all. Even better.

↓

If one of you dudes is strapped for cash,

cash dudes strapped

↓

If one of you dudes is strapped for cash,

cash dudes strapped

↓

do you a solid.

solid

↓

do you a solid.

solid

↓

Move in, split the rent "fiddy-fiddy."

rent split

↓

Move in, split the rent "fiddy-fiddy."

rent split

↓

Or, 40/"siddy" depending on square footage of bedrooms.

bedrooms depending footage square

↓

Or, 40/"siddy" depending on square footage of bedrooms.

bedrooms depending footage square

↓

Come on! Think about it!

↓

Come on! Think about it!

↓

Jazzy Jeff!

jeff

↓

Jazzy Jeff!

jeff

↓

Hold up!

↓

Hold up!

↓

Hey, uh, you got space in your crib?

crib space

↓

Hey, uh, you got space in your crib?

crib space

↓

Um...

↓

Um...

↓

Yes, I-I have a room.

room

↓

Yes, I-I have a room.

room

↓

Hmm?

↓

Hmm?

↓

Fuck. Yeah.

fuck

↓

Fuck. Yeah.

fuck

↓

Fuck yeah!

fuck

↓

Fuck yeah!

fuck

↓

There he is!

↓

There he is!

↓

Richard: Nice place.

place richard

↓

Richard: Nice place.

place richard

↓

Jared: Yeah.

jared

↓

Jared: Yeah.

jared

↓

That's what a billion-dollar evaluation will get you.

billion dollar evaluation

↓

That's what a billion-dollar evaluation will get you.

billion dollar evaluation

↓

Hey, what a great topic of conversation for you and Dana.

conversation dana topic

↓

Hey, what a great topic of conversation for you and Dana.

conversation dana topic

↓

Dana! Oh, hey.

dana

↓

Dana! Oh, hey.

dana

↓

You're just standing there. Like a cool cowboy.

cool cowboy standing

↓

You're just standing there. Like a cool cowboy.

cool cowboy standing

↓

Richard: Hey, yeah.

richard

↓

Richard: Hey, yeah.

richard

↓

I-I really like your place.

place

↓

I-I really like your place.

place

↓

Yeah, me too.

↓

Yeah, me too.

↓

Well, he liked it, so he bought it.

bought liked

↓

Well, he liked it, so he bought it.

bought liked

↓

Right? Just like you and that hoodie.

↓

Right? Just like you and that hoodie.

↓

So, Dana, interesting story.

dana interesting story

↓

So, Dana, interesting story.

dana interesting story

↓

Uh, the reason Richard has this bandage on his neck,

bandage neck reason richard

↓

Uh, the reason Richard has this bandage on his neck,

bandage neck reason richard

↓

and that he's got one on his hand,

hand

↓

and that he's got one on his hand,

hand

↓

is because he got so exhausted during a code sprint,

code exhausted

↓

is because he got so exhausted during a code sprint,

code exhausted

↓

that he walked through a plate-glass window.

glass plate walked window

↓

that he walked through a plate-glass window.

glass plate walked window

↓

Now, I-I read on Pando that you got injured also

injured read

↓

Now, I-I read on Pando that you got injured also

injured read

↓

early on at your company?

company early

↓

early on at your company?

company early

↓

You should tell Richard that story.

richard story

↓

You should tell Richard that story.

richard story

↓

Right? Interesting topic between CEOs.

interesting topic

↓

Right? Interesting topic between CEOs.

interesting topic

↓

If you want. I mean, you don't have to.

↓

If you want. I mean, you don't have to.

↓

Jared: Alright, I'm gonna go mingle.

alright jared mingle

↓

Jared: Alright, I'm gonna go mingle.

alright jared mingle

↓

Go get 'em.

↓

Go get 'em.

↓

So, how did you hurt yourself?

hurt

↓

So, how did you hurt yourself?

hurt

↓

I tried to commit suicide.

commit commit-suicide suicide tried

↓

I tried to commit suicide.

commit commit-suicide suicide tried

↓

Cool. Not-- you know, interesting.

cool interesting

↓

Cool. Not-- you know, interesting.

cool interesting

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

Oh, wow! You cashed another beer, you partier.

another another-beer beer

↓

Oh, wow! You cashed another beer, you partier.

another another-beer beer

↓

I haven't cut loose in so long.

loose

↓

I haven't cut loose in so long.

loose

↓

I'll probably get sloshed off of one beer,

beer

↓

I'll probably get sloshed off of one beer,

beer

↓

and start babbling.

babbling start

↓

and start babbling.

babbling start

↓

That's, um...

↓

That's, um...

↓

Let's have a beer, right? Let's celebrate!

beer celebrate

↓

Let's have a beer, right? Let's celebrate!

beer celebrate

↓

New job! New roomies!

↓

New job! New roomies!

↓

New internet, right?

internet

↓

New internet, right?

internet

↓

I said I'd get sloshed off of one beer, crazy man.

beer crazy

↓

I said I'd get sloshed off of one beer, crazy man.

beer crazy

↓

Okay, um...

↓

Okay, um...

↓

I'm gonna go to bed. Good night.

night

↓

I'm gonna go to bed. Good night.

night

↓

No, no, no! You know what? Hold on!

↓

No, no, no! You know what? Hold on!

↓

I'll have... I'll have one beer!

beer

↓

I'll have... I'll have one beer!

beer

↓

I'm not saying I don't like to party, Jeff.

jeff party

↓

I'm not saying I don't like to party, Jeff.

jeff party

↓

You like vodka? Let's have a vodka.

vodka

↓

You like vodka? Let's have a vodka.

vodka

↓

Yeah! Let's do vodka.

vodka

↓

Yeah! Let's do vodka.

vodka

↓

Okay!

↓

Okay!

↓

Yeah.

↓

Yeah.

↓

That's so much of it.

↓

That's so much of it.

↓

That's a normal amount right there.

amount normal

↓

That's a normal amount right there.

amount normal

↓

Is it?

↓

Is it?

↓

I like it.

↓

I like it.

↓

It's really cool.

cool

↓

It's really cool.

cool

↓

So, who painted it?

painted

↓

So, who painted it?

painted

↓

A machine.

machine

↓

A machine.

machine

↓

Ben: It's actually the first work of art

↓

Ben: It's actually the first work of art

↓

made by AI to be sold at Sotheby's.

sold

↓

made by AI to be sold at Sotheby's.

sold

↓

Sorry I'm late, Dana. I got caught up.

caught dana late

↓

Sorry I'm late, Dana. I got caught up.

caught dana late

↓

Hey! Hey, wait a minute, you're-- you're Richard Hendricks.

minute richard

↓

Hey! Hey, wait a minute, you're-- you're Richard Hendricks.

minute richard

↓

Mm-hmm.

↓

Mm-hmm.

↓

Sorry, I'm, uh, Ben Burkhardt.

↓

Sorry, I'm, uh, Ben Burkhardt.

↓

I'm-- I'm Dana's COO.

↓

I'm-- I'm Dana's COO.

↓

Dana told me he invited you. I'm so psyched you came!

dana invited psyched

↓

Dana told me he invited you. I'm so psyched you came!

dana invited psyched

↓

Yeah. I got-- I have so many questions for you, man.

questions

↓

Yeah. I got-- I have so many questions for you, man.

questions

↓

Do you want to grab a drink or do you want to stay here?

drink grab

↓

Do you want to grab a drink or do you want to stay here?

drink grab

↓

There. Yeah. Oh, great.

↓

There. Yeah. Oh, great.

↓

I mean, even way back when I was finishing my PhD at MIT,

finishing

↓

I mean, even way back when I was finishing my PhD at MIT,

finishing

↓

I would tell anyone that would listen

↓

I would tell anyone that would listen

↓

that a decentralized system was the obvious eventuality.

obvious system

↓

that a decentralized system was the obvious eventuality.

obvious system

↓

Yep. And now it's more necessary than ever.

necessary

↓

Yep. And now it's more necessary than ever.

necessary

↓

I mean, the stuff Google and Facebook are getting away with.

facebook google stuff

↓

I mean, the stuff Google and Facebook are getting away with.

facebook google stuff

↓

It's insane. Totally. Right?

insane

↓

It's insane. Totally. Right?

insane

↓

That's why I've always said that the user's data

data users

↓

That's why I've always said that the user's data

data users

↓

should be in the hands of consumers,

hands

↓

should be in the hands of consumers,

hands

↓

not the corporations.

corporations

↓

not the corporations.

corporations

↓

100%, but see, that can't happen,

happen

↓

100%, but see, that can't happen,

happen

↓

until someone iterates a functional alternative.

alternative functional

↓

until someone iterates a functional alternative.

alternative functional

↓

Which, I believe, Richard,

believe richard

↓

Which, I believe, Richard,

believe richard

↓

I believe you're about to do.

believe

↓

I believe you're about to do.

believe

↓

Well, I don't know. Trying to, yeah.

↓

Well, I don't know. Trying to, yeah.

↓

Have you solved, uh, co-locating data with the compute test?

data solved test

↓

Have you solved, uh, co-locating data with the compute test?

data solved test

↓

How do you know about that?

↓

How do you know about that?

↓

Do you code? I used to, man.

code used

↓

Do you code? I used to, man.

code used

↓

Uh, yeah, I loved it so much,

loved

↓

Uh, yeah, I loved it so much,

loved

↓

but, you know, I got drawn over to the business side.

business drawn side

↓

but, you know, I got drawn over to the business side.

business drawn side

↓

Jared: Richard!

jared richard

↓

Jared: Richard!

jared richard

↓

There you are!

↓

There you are!

↓

Hey. Jared Dunn. Hi! Ben Burkhardt.

jared

↓

Hey. Jared Dunn. Hi! Ben Burkhardt.

jared

↓

Hey, Dana. So, it's 9:00 AM in Dubai.

dana

↓

Hey, Dana. So, it's 9:00 AM in Dubai.

dana

↓

I gotta make a call, so, excuse me, guys.

excuse

↓

I gotta make a call, so, excuse me, guys.

excuse

↓

Oh.

↓

Oh.

↓

So, um, Dana was just telling me

dana telling

↓

So, um, Dana was just telling me

dana telling

↓

that he prefers a late lunch, too.

late lunch

↓

that he prefers a late lunch, too.

late lunch

↓

Just like...

↓

Just like...

↓

Is that right?

↓

Is that right?

↓

Kind of.

↓

Kind of.

↓

Well, I see a colleague.

colleague

↓

Well, I see a colleague.

colleague

↓

I'll leave you guys to-- to chat.

chat

↓

I'll leave you guys to-- to chat.

chat

↓

Cool. Mm--

cool

↓

Cool. Mm--

cool

↓

Jared: So, on the way out, Dana told me

dana jared

↓

Jared: So, on the way out, Dana told me

dana jared

↓

that he really loved meeting you.

loved meeting

↓

that he really loved meeting you.

loved meeting

↓

He said it went great!

↓

He said it went great!

↓

Did you not think so?

↓

Did you not think so?

↓

Yeah, it's just... he didn't really talk, though.

↓

Yeah, it's just... he didn't really talk, though.

↓

Yeah. That's one of his quirks.

↓

Yeah. That's one of his quirks.

↓

He's fun.

fun

↓

He's fun.

fun

↓

Hey, you know who I did have a good conversation with?

conversation

↓

Hey, you know who I did have a good conversation with?

conversation

↓

Who? His COO.

↓

Who? His COO.

↓

Who, Ben?

↓

Who, Ben?

↓

Yeah, um, do you know him?

↓

Yeah, um, do you know him?

↓

Um, not well.

↓

Um, not well.

↓

I hear he's a very competent executive.

competent executive

↓

I hear he's a very competent executive.

competent executive

↓

But apparently, he left Oculus for Quiver

apparently left quiver

↓

But apparently, he left Oculus for Quiver

apparently left quiver

↓

in kind of an unprofessional manner.

manner unprofessional

↓

in kind of an unprofessional manner.

manner unprofessional

↓

Hmm, okay. Well, he really loves Pied Piper.

loves piper

↓

Hmm, okay. Well, he really loves Pied Piper.

loves piper

↓

Jared, come on! This is your condo.

condo jared

↓

Jared, come on! This is your condo.

condo jared

↓

Sleep in your bed.

sleep

↓

Sleep in your bed.

sleep

↓

Don't be silly. Hey!

silly

↓

Don't be silly. Hey!

silly

↓

Uh, leave the lights on as long as you want.

lights

↓

Uh, leave the lights on as long as you want.

lights

↓

Uh, hey, Jared?

jared

↓

Uh, hey, Jared?

jared

↓

Yes? Um...

↓

Yes? Um...

↓

Never mind. Uh, see you tomorrow morning.

mind morning tomorrow tomorrow-morning

↓

Never mind. Uh, see you tomorrow morning.

mind morning tomorrow tomorrow-morning

↓

Sweet dreams.

dreams sweet sweet-dreams

↓

Sweet dreams.

dreams sweet sweet-dreams

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

Did I tell you about Gilfoyle's terrible song?

song

↓

Did I tell you about Gilfoyle's terrible song?

song

↓

Yes. Yes, you did. And I heard it.

heard

↓

Yes. Yes, you did. And I heard it.

heard

↓

I'm-- I'm gonna go clean the rice cooker, Dinesh.

clean cooker rice

↓

I'm-- I'm gonna go clean the rice cooker, Dinesh.

clean cooker rice

↓

You know what the worst part is?

part worst worst-part

↓

You know what the worst part is?

part worst worst-part

↓

He's actually a decent coder.

decent

↓

He's actually a decent coder.

decent

↓

He almost never fucks up.

fucks

↓

He almost never fucks up.

fucks

↓

Uh, wait, almost?

↓

Uh, wait, almost?

↓

One time, he royally fucked up,

fucked

↓

One time, he royally fucked up,

fucked

↓

but even then, he ended up saving the day

ended saving

↓

but even then, he ended up saving the day

ended saving

↓

with all his fridges.

↓

with all his fridges.

↓

Fridges?

↓

Fridges?

↓

Seppen Smart Fridges!

smart

↓

Seppen Smart Fridges!

smart

↓

And you know what?

↓

And you know what?

↓

It was totally illegal.

illegal

↓

It was totally illegal.

illegal

↓

Really

↓

Really

↓

So, tell me about these fridges. Jeff!

jeff

↓

So, tell me about these fridges. Jeff!

jeff

↓

I can't tell you that.

↓

I can't tell you that.

↓

It's a company secret.

company secret

↓

It's a company secret.

company secret

↓

Okay, um, let me get you some more vodka, Dinesh.

vodka

↓

Okay, um, let me get you some more vodka, Dinesh.

vodka

↓

Gavin: Thank you guys for seeing me on such short notice.

notice seeing short short-notice

↓

Gavin: Thank you guys for seeing me on such short notice.

notice seeing short short-notice

↓

Tom: Well, it's an honor to have you, Gavin.

honor

↓

Tom: Well, it's an honor to have you, Gavin.

honor

↓

Back there, we test our compressor run capacitors.

test

↓

Back there, we test our compressor run capacitors.

test

↓

But here is what I'm sure you'll be most interested in seeing.

interested seeing

↓

But here is what I'm sure you'll be most interested in seeing.

interested seeing

↓

This is our smart fridge development team.

development fridge smart team

↓

This is our smart fridge development team.

development fridge smart team

↓

To be honest, we were a little nervous

honest nervous

↓

To be honest, we were a little nervous

honest nervous

↓

about wading into the Internet-enabled market.

internet market

↓

about wading into the Internet-enabled market.

internet market

↓

Over the last 80 years,

years

↓

Over the last 80 years,

years

↓

we've built a real trust with our customers.

built customers real trust

↓

we've built a real trust with our customers.

built customers real trust

↓

Alright! Great tour!

alright tour

↓

Alright! Great tour!

alright tour

↓

Oh, there's a lot more to see.

↓

Oh, there's a lot more to see.

↓

Ugh. Why? Look.

↓

Ugh. Why? Look.

↓

I came here to offer you a partnership

offer partnership

↓

I came here to offer you a partnership

offer partnership

↓

to cut down your server bills.

bills server

↓

to cut down your server bills.

bills server

↓

Oh!

↓

Oh!

↓

Well, our server costs were far higher

costs higher server

↓

Well, our server costs were far higher

costs higher server

↓

than we anticipated.

anticipated

↓

than we anticipated.

anticipated

↓

As we said, we're not well versed in--

↓

As we said, we're not well versed in--

↓

The 20th century? Yeah, you mentioned that.

century mentioned

↓

The 20th century? Yeah, you mentioned that.

century mentioned

↓

Do you want to save a fortune or not?

fortune save

↓

Do you want to save a fortune or not?

fortune save

↓

Well, yes.

↓

Well, yes.

↓

In exchange, I need you to do something for me

exchange

↓

In exchange, I need you to do something for me

exchange

↓

with regard to the people who hacked your refrigerators.

hacked regard

↓

with regard to the people who hacked your refrigerators.

hacked regard

↓

I'm going to destroy their lives.

destroy lives

↓

I'm going to destroy their lives.

destroy lives

↓

Richard: So, what? Ben: So...

richard

↓

Richard: So, what? Ben: So...

richard

↓

So, I turned to Bill Gates... Yeah?

bill gates turned

↓

So, I turned to Bill Gates... Yeah?

bill gates turned

↓

Right, and I said...

↓

Right, and I said...

↓

"I don't know, Bill. Maybe you should Google it."

bill google

↓

"I don't know, Bill. Maybe you should Google it."

bill google

↓

You said that to Bill Gates?

bill gates

↓

You said that to Bill Gates?

bill gates

↓

I did! I swear.

swear

↓

I did! I swear.

swear

↓

Hey...

↓

Hey...

↓

can I ask you, um...

↓

can I ask you, um...

↓

Did you tell Dana that we were having lunch?

dana having having-lunch lunch

↓

Did you tell Dana that we were having lunch?

dana having having-lunch lunch

↓

Richard, I told you that Bill Gates story for a reason.

bill gates reason richard story

↓

Richard, I told you that Bill Gates story for a reason.

bill gates reason richard story

↓

I, um, I practice something called "radical candor."

called practice radical

↓

I, um, I practice something called "radical candor."

called practice radical

↓

Which is no matter how uncomfortable the truth is,

matter truth uncomfortable

↓

Which is no matter how uncomfortable the truth is,

matter truth uncomfortable

↓

I'm gonna tell it to you.

↓

I'm gonna tell it to you.

↓

And the honest truth is...

honest truth

↓

And the honest truth is...

honest truth

↓

I did not tell Dana about this lunch.

dana lunch

↓

I did not tell Dana about this lunch.

dana lunch

↓

Things with Dana have gotten stagnant.

dana gotten

↓

Things with Dana have gotten stagnant.

dana gotten

↓

But the other night...

night

↓

But the other night...

night

↓

talking to you, Richard, I--

richard

↓

talking to you, Richard, I--

richard

↓

I felt that spark again.

spark

↓

I felt that spark again.

spark

↓

What are you saying? Okay, well.

↓

What are you saying? Okay, well.

↓

The first tenet of rad-can, Richard,

richard

↓

The first tenet of rad-can, Richard,

richard

↓

is to just-- is to just say what you think,

↓

is to just-- is to just say what you think,

↓

and so I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna say what I think,

↓

and so I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna say what I think,

↓

and, Richard, I think we should work together.

richard

↓

and, Richard, I think we should work together.

richard

↓

Oh. You mean, like...?

↓

Oh. You mean, like...?

↓

Like, I could be your COO.

↓

Like, I could be your COO.

↓

Um...

↓

Um...

↓

I don't know.

↓

I don't know.

↓

Maybe we shouldn't be doing this.

↓

Maybe we shouldn't be doing this.

↓

Whoa, whoa, Richard.

richard whoa

↓

Whoa, whoa, Richard.

richard whoa

↓

We're just talking.

↓

We're just talking.

↓

You see any numbers written down here?

numbers written

↓

You see any numbers written down here?

numbers written

↓

Do you see a Power Point?

point power

↓

Do you see a Power Point?

point power

↓

No, we don't even have a laptop.

laptop

↓

No, we don't even have a laptop.

laptop

↓

Exactly! 'Cause we're not doing anything wrong. Oh, shit!

↓

Exactly! 'Cause we're not doing anything wrong. Oh, shit!

↓

Party of one. Ben : Shit.

party

↓

Party of one. Ben : Shit.

party

↓

I looked at his calendar and it said he had a meeting.

calendar looked meeting

↓

I looked at his calendar and it said he had a meeting.

calendar looked meeting

↓

Okay, Richard, I'm gonna continue being honest with you

continue honest richard

↓

Okay, Richard, I'm gonna continue being honest with you

continue honest richard

↓

and tell you that I have to leave now through the kitchen.

kitchen

↓

and tell you that I have to leave now through the kitchen.

kitchen

↓

Okay. Okay, please don't tell anyone about this.

↓

Okay. Okay, please don't tell anyone about this.

↓

Okay.

↓

Okay.

↓

Richard: What? Hey!

richard

↓

Richard: What? Hey!

richard

↓

Hey, Dana! What the heck? Dana, right?

dana heck

↓

Hey, Dana! What the heck? Dana, right?

dana heck

↓

Oh, hi.

↓

Oh, hi.

↓

I'm just-- Are you having lunch alone?

alone having having-lunch lunch

↓

I'm just-- Are you having lunch alone?

alone having having-lunch lunch

↓

I am! I'm totally alone.

alone

↓

I am! I'm totally alone.

alone

↓

Uh, in fact...

fact

↓

Uh, in fact...

fact

↓

do you want to, uh,

↓

do you want to, uh,

↓

join me at my table for one?

join table

↓

join me at my table for one?

join table

↓

Oh, okay.

↓

Oh, okay.

↓

Sure.

↓

Sure.

↓

Come on over.

↓

Come on over.

↓

One beef pot pie. One beef pot pie, no carrots.

beef carrots

↓

One beef pot pie. One beef pot pie, no carrots.

beef carrots

↓

Yep. Here.

↓

Yep. Here.

↓

Put 'em here.

↓

Put 'em here.

↓

I love beef pot pie.

beef love

↓

I love beef pot pie.

beef love

↓

And only kind of like carrots.

carrots

↓

And only kind of like carrots.

carrots

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

Oh, fuck!

fuck

↓

Oh, fuck!

fuck

↓

Gilfoyle, goddammit.

goddammit

↓

Gilfoyle, goddammit.

goddammit

↓

Could you please stop that fucking noise? I'm serious.

fucking noise serious

↓

Could you please stop that fucking noise? I'm serious.

fucking noise serious

↓

How will I know when to remote toggle my rig?

remote

↓

How will I know when to remote toggle my rig?

remote

↓

Easy, you won't, and neither will any of us,

easy

↓

Easy, you won't, and neither will any of us,

easy

↓

because you won't remote toggle anything!

remote

↓

because you won't remote toggle anything!

remote

↓

No more remote toggling! Got it?

remote

↓

No more remote toggling! Got it?

remote

↓

Just... Hey.

↓

Just... Hey.

↓

Hey! How was lunch, you little minx?

lunch

↓

Hey! How was lunch, you little minx?

lunch

↓

What?

↓

What?

↓

Yeah, you thought I wouldn't find out.

↓

Yeah, you thought I wouldn't find out.

↓

I was, uh, texting with Dana.

dana texting

↓

I was, uh, texting with Dana.

dana texting

↓

Just checking in. And he mentioned

checking mentioned

↓

Just checking in. And he mentioned

checking mentioned

↓

that you two met up. Oh, yeah!

↓

that you two met up. Oh, yeah!

↓

Yeah! Just, just briefly for-- yeah.

↓

Yeah! Just, just briefly for-- yeah.

↓

Yeah! I-I-I knew you two would hit it off.

↓

Yeah! I-I-I knew you two would hit it off.

↓

You know, Dana did mention

dana mention

↓

You know, Dana did mention

dana mention

↓

that he thought you might be bulimic.

bulimic might

↓

that he thought you might be bulimic.

bulimic might

↓

Okay.

↓

Okay.

↓

Great, um...

↓

Great, um...

↓

Jared, do you think it's time we hire a COO?

hire jared

↓

Jared, do you think it's time we hire a COO?

hire jared

↓

Oh!

↓

Oh!

↓

Did Dana suggest we hire someone like Ben?

dana hire suggest

↓

Did Dana suggest we hire someone like Ben?

dana hire suggest

↓

Yeah. Yeah, like Ben.

↓

Yeah. Yeah, like Ben.

↓

You see, if you didn't have lunch with Dana,

dana lunch

↓

You see, if you didn't have lunch with Dana,

dana lunch

↓

this never would've come up.

wouldve

↓

this never would've come up.

wouldve

↓

I'll put together a list.

list

↓

I'll put together a list.

list

↓

Great.

↓

Great.

↓

Um...

↓

Um...

↓

Richard, you should see this.

richard

↓

Richard, you should see this.

richard

↓

What the fuck?

fuck

↓

What the fuck?

fuck

↓

Seppen is suing us for $10 million in damages.

damages million suing

↓

Seppen is suing us for $10 million in damages.

damages million suing

↓

The complaint specifically cites,

complaint specifically

↓

The complaint specifically cites,

complaint specifically

↓

"sullying their smart fridges with mime-simulated fellatio."

mime smart

↓

"sullying their smart fridges with mime-simulated fellatio."

mime smart

↓

"Our customers invite us into their homes.

customers homes invite

↓

"Our customers invite us into their homes.

customers homes invite

↓

"The kitchen is the modern hearth.

kitchen modern

↓

"The kitchen is the modern hearth.

kitchen modern

↓

We cannot have that trust violated." Dinesh: Is that a typo?

cannot trust violated

↓

We cannot have that trust violated." Dinesh: Is that a typo?

cannot trust violated

↓

Do they mean "heart"?

heart

↓

Do they mean "heart"?

heart

↓

How did Seppen find out it was us?

↓

How did Seppen find out it was us?

↓

I don't know.

↓

I don't know.

↓

You tell us, Gilfoyle.

↓

You tell us, Gilfoyle.

↓

You said you pulled all our code and bleached it.

bleached code pulled

↓

You said you pulled all our code and bleached it.

bleached code pulled

↓

Maybe you missed something.

missed

↓

Maybe you missed something.

missed

↓

No.

↓

No.

↓

No way.

↓

No way.

↓

They have no proof it was us. Ignore them.

ignore proof

↓

They have no proof it was us. Ignore them.

ignore proof

↓

Ignore them? What the fuck kind of solution is that?

fuck ignore solution

↓

Ignore them? What the fuck kind of solution is that?

fuck ignore solution

↓

No. "Hearth." It's a word. Huh!

word

↓

No. "Hearth." It's a word. Huh!

word

↓

We don't need to solve anything. They have nothing.

solve

↓

We don't need to solve anything. They have nothing.

solve

↓

Well, I'm pretty sure they have something, Gilfoyle.

↓

Well, I'm pretty sure they have something, Gilfoyle.

↓

So you fucked up somewhere! I didn't fuck up.

fuck fucked

↓

So you fucked up somewhere! I didn't fuck up.

fuck fucked

↓

Jared: Well, guys, I'm sure there's something we can do here.

jared

↓

Jared: Well, guys, I'm sure there's something we can do here.

jared

↓

Uh, just give me a second.

second

↓

Uh, just give me a second.

second

↓

Hey, sorry! I-I can't talk right now.

↓

Hey, sorry! I-I can't talk right now.

↓

Can we meet up?

meet

↓

Can we meet up?

meet

↓

Um, my place. Midnight.

midnight place

↓

Um, my place. Midnight.

midnight place

↓

Ben : Okay, I gotta go.

↓

Ben : Okay, I gotta go.

↓

Okay.

↓

Okay.

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

Ben: Okay, so wait.

↓

Ben: Okay, so wait.

↓

You're telling me this Gilfoyle guy

telling

↓

You're telling me this Gilfoyle guy

telling

↓

first hacked into the fridges as a prank?

hacked prank

↓

first hacked into the fridges as a prank?

hacked prank

↓

Without your knowledge?

knowledge

↓

Without your knowledge?

knowledge

↓

Uh, yeah.

↓

Uh, yeah.

↓

Well, there you go, Richard!

richard

↓

Well, there you go, Richard!

richard

↓

If you didn't authorize it,

↓

If you didn't authorize it,

↓

then he's acting as a rogue agent.

acting agent rogue

↓

then he's acting as a rogue agent.

acting agent rogue

↓

You tell Seppen that and Pied Piper's off scot-free.

free scot

↓

You tell Seppen that and Pied Piper's off scot-free.

free scot

↓

Yeah, but what would happen to Gilfoyle?

happen

↓

Yeah, but what would happen to Gilfoyle?

happen

↓

I don't know. There'd be criminal and civil charges

charges civil criminal thered

↓

I don't know. There'd be criminal and civil charges

charges civil criminal thered

↓

he'd have to deal with on his own.

deal

↓

he'd have to deal with on his own.

deal

↓

Oh, Jesus!

jesus

↓

Oh, Jesus!

jesus

↓

I don't know. Sounds kinda brutal.

brutal kinda sounds

↓

I don't know. Sounds kinda brutal.

brutal kinda sounds

↓

In the end, being on those fridges saved us.

saved

↓

In the end, being on those fridges saved us.

saved

↓

Richard, I-I told you about radical candor, yeah?

radical richard

↓

Richard, I-I told you about radical candor, yeah?

radical richard

↓

Well, what I'm getting from you now,

↓

Well, what I'm getting from you now,

↓

is the opposite of that.

opposite

↓

is the opposite of that.

opposite

↓

It's actually something we call "ruinous empathy."

empathy

↓

It's actually something we call "ruinous empathy."

empathy

↓

You want to destroy your entire company

company destroy entire

↓

You want to destroy your entire company

company destroy entire

↓

just to keep one bad actor happy?

actor happy

↓

just to keep one bad actor happy?

actor happy

↓

That's not fair to you, Richard!

fair richard

↓

That's not fair to you, Richard!

fair richard

↓

Oh, come on. Gilfoyle will never be happy.

happy

↓

Oh, come on. Gilfoyle will never be happy.

happy

↓

This is exactly the kinda thing

kinda

↓

This is exactly the kinda thing

kinda

↓

I could help you with if you hired me.

hired

↓

I could help you with if you hired me.

hired

↓

Hey, any news?

news

↓

Hey, any news?

news

↓

Oh, goddammit. Why is that thing still fucking doing that?

fucking goddammit

↓

Oh, goddammit. Why is that thing still fucking doing that?

fucking goddammit

↓

I guess Gilfoyle forgot to turn it off.

forgot

↓

I guess Gilfoyle forgot to turn it off.

forgot

↓

It's been doing that all morning.

morning

↓

It's been doing that all morning.

morning

↓

I don't have his password.

password

↓

I don't have his password.

password

↓

Bitcoin is really volatile today.

today

↓

Bitcoin is really volatile today.

today

↓

Yeah, okay. Uh, where is he?

↓

Yeah, okay. Uh, where is he?

↓

Well, it's 10:00 AM, so not here.

↓

Well, it's 10:00 AM, so not here.

↓

Okay, you know what? Fuck Gilfoyle.

fuck

↓

Okay, you know what? Fuck Gilfoyle.

fuck

↓

Fuck him right to hell.

fuck

↓

Fuck him right to hell.

fuck

↓

I've been saying that for years.

years

↓

I've been saying that for years.

years

↓

Where's Jared?

jared

↓

Where's Jared?

jared

↓

Richard, are you serious?

richard serious

↓

Richard, are you serious?

richard serious

↓

Yes.

↓

Yes.

↓

Well, I concede that laying it all at Gilfoyle's feet

concede feet laying

↓

Well, I concede that laying it all at Gilfoyle's feet

concede feet laying

↓

might get us out of the Seppen lawsuit, but...

lawsuit might

↓

might get us out of the Seppen lawsuit, but...

lawsuit might

↓

I mean, you'd really throw him to the wolves like that?

throw wolves

↓

I mean, you'd really throw him to the wolves like that?

throw wolves

↓

That doesn't sound like you.

sound

↓

That doesn't sound like you.

sound

↓

Well, maybe I'm just becoming

becoming

↓

Well, maybe I'm just becoming

becoming

↓

a little less ruinously empathetic.

less

↓

a little less ruinously empathetic.

less

↓

Have you been seeing a therapist?

seeing therapist

↓

Have you been seeing a therapist?

seeing therapist

↓

No.

↓

No.

↓

But...

↓

But...

↓

I have been seeing Ben.

seeing

↓

I have been seeing Ben.

seeing

↓

Ben Burkhardt.

↓

Ben Burkhardt.

↓

Oh, Richard, no.

richard

↓

Oh, Richard, no.

richard

↓

He's Dana's COO. You're--

↓

He's Dana's COO. You're--

↓

You're jeopardizing your entire friendship with Dana.

dana entire friendship

↓

You're jeopardizing your entire friendship with Dana.

dana entire friendship

↓

What friendship with Dana?

dana friendship

↓

What friendship with Dana?

dana friendship

↓

Who could be friends with that guy?

friends

↓

Who could be friends with that guy?

friends

↓

I got news for you, Jared.

jared news

↓

I got news for you, Jared.

jared news

↓

Dana sucks, man!

dana sucks

↓

Dana sucks, man!

dana sucks

↓

Richard!

richard

↓

Richard!

richard

↓

I mean, he is a dog.

↓

I mean, he is a dog.

↓

How did he even found his own company?

company found

↓

How did he even found his own company?

company found

↓

Is he even smart?

smart

↓

Is he even smart?

smart

↓

Okay, that's unfair.

unfair

↓

Okay, that's unfair.

unfair

↓

Look, this is your company.

company

↓

Look, this is your company.

company

↓

And you can work with whomever you want.

whomever

↓

And you can work with whomever you want.

whomever

↓

But I need you to think long and hard

hard

↓

But I need you to think long and hard

hard

↓

about what you're proposing to do to Gilfoyle.

proposing

↓

about what you're proposing to do to Gilfoyle.

proposing

↓

We're talking about criminal charges here.

charges criminal

↓

We're talking about criminal charges here.

charges criminal

↓

He could be deported.

deported

↓

He could be deported.

deported

↓

There has to be another option.

another option

↓

There has to be another option.

another option

↓

Well, no offense, Jared,

jared offense

↓

Well, no offense, Jared,

jared offense

↓

but Ben says there isn't.

↓

but Ben says there isn't.

↓

Okay? And he is a world-class COO

class world

↓

Okay? And he is a world-class COO

class world

↓

that has brought multiple companies to a billion dollars.

billion billion-dollars brought companies dollars multiple

↓

that has brought multiple companies to a billion dollars.

billion billion-dollars brought companies dollars multiple

↓

And you're just a biz dev guy.

↓

And you're just a biz dev guy.

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

I'm-- I'm sorry. I--

↓

I'm-- I'm sorry. I--

↓

I just think that in this particular situation,

particular situation

↓

I just think that in this particular situation,

particular situation

↓

Ben might know a little better.

might

↓

Ben might know a little better.

might

↓

Okay.

↓

Okay.

↓

You're the boss.

boss

↓

You're the boss.

boss

↓

You know, but I will say this.

↓

You know, but I will say this.

↓

If you're really going to start working with Ben,

start start-working working

↓

If you're really going to start working with Ben,

start start-working working

↓

at least give Dana the common courtesy

common courtesy dana least

↓

at least give Dana the common courtesy

common courtesy dana least

↓

of telling him the truth about what you guys are doing.

telling truth

↓

of telling him the truth about what you guys are doing.

telling truth

↓

Because if you don't tell him...

↓

Because if you don't tell him...

↓

you're the dog.

↓

you're the dog.

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

Thanks for, uh, having me over.

having thanks

↓

Thanks for, uh, having me over.

having thanks

↓

Of course. So, it's gonna be a bit weird at first.

course weird

↓

Of course. So, it's gonna be a bit weird at first.

course weird

↓

Then it's gonna be okay.

↓

Then it's gonna be okay.

↓

What?

↓

What?

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

Hi, this is Jared Dunn.

jared

↓

Hi, this is Jared Dunn.

jared

↓

Um, sorry, I don't recognize this number.

number recognize

↓

Um, sorry, I don't recognize this number.

number recognize

↓

Jared? Come here now.

jared

↓

Jared? Come here now.

jared

↓

Jian

↓

Jian

↓

So... Ben told me everything.

↓

So... Ben told me everything.

↓

Oh!

↓

Oh!

↓

Uh...

↓

Uh...

↓

Well...

↓

Well...

↓

Radical candor, I guess, right?

radical

↓

Radical candor, I guess, right?

radical

↓

Yeah, he told me how you kept texting him non-stop.

texting

↓

Yeah, he told me how you kept texting him non-stop.

texting

↓

And he kept refusing, but you were relentless.

refusing relentless

↓

And he kept refusing, but you were relentless.

refusing relentless

↓

What? Uh, no!

↓

What? Uh, no!

↓

Richard, it's-- it's immaterial.

richard

↓

Richard, it's-- it's immaterial.

richard

↓

The point is, Dana knows everything now.

dana knows point

↓

The point is, Dana knows everything now.

dana knows point

↓

However it came to that, it's just words in the winds.

winds words

↓

However it came to that, it's just words in the winds.

winds words

↓

"Words in the winds"?

winds words

↓

"Words in the winds"?

winds words

↓

Yeah.

↓

Yeah.

↓

Well, Richard, looks like you got what you wanted.

richard wanted

↓

Well, Richard, looks like you got what you wanted.

richard wanted

↓

You're both adults.

adults

↓

You're both adults.

adults

↓

You can work together if you want.

↓

You can work together if you want.

↓

I just wish you'd demonstrated the measure of spirit

demonstrated measure spirit wish

↓

I just wish you'd demonstrated the measure of spirit

demonstrated measure spirit wish

↓

to discuss this with me to my face.

discuss face

↓

to discuss this with me to my face.

discuss face

↓

But...

↓

But...

↓

guess there's no honor among thieves, hmm?

among honor thieves

↓

guess there's no honor among thieves, hmm?

among honor thieves

↓

Well...

↓

Well...

↓

good luck, gentlemen.

gentlemen luck

↓

good luck, gentlemen.

gentlemen luck

↓

You deserve each other.

deserve

↓

You deserve each other.

deserve

↓

Dana.

dana

↓

Dana.

dana

↓

Wow.

↓

Wow.

↓

You know, I've never really seen him like that.

seen

↓

You know, I've never really seen him like that.

seen

↓

He's so assertive.

assertive

↓

He's so assertive.

assertive

↓

Uh, articulate.

↓

Uh, articulate.

↓

Yeah, he's had a head cold the last couple weeks.

cold couple couple-weeks head weeks

↓

Yeah, he's had a head cold the last couple weeks.

cold couple couple-weeks head weeks

↓

Been pretty low energy.

energy

↓

Been pretty low energy.

energy

↓

Really?

↓

Really?

↓

Yep!

↓

Yep!

↓

Oh! So, I guess...

↓

Oh! So, I guess...

↓

You and me, huh, Richard?

richard

↓

You and me, huh, Richard?

richard

↓

Together, at last.

↓

Together, at last.

↓

Yeah.

↓

Yeah.

↓

Dana rides a motorcycle?

dana motorcycle rides

↓

Dana rides a motorcycle?

dana motorcycle rides

↓

Yep.

↓

Yep.

↓

Cool.

cool

↓

Cool.

cool

↓

So, uh, what exactly did you--

↓

So, uh, what exactly did you--

↓

Jian-Yang: The witch lost his mind.

lost mind witch yang

↓

Jian-Yang: The witch lost his mind.

lost mind witch yang

↓

Gilfoyle, you smoke?

smoke

↓

Gilfoyle, you smoke?

smoke

↓

I kept mulling that Seppen shit.

↓

I kept mulling that Seppen shit.

↓

I didn't leave a bit of my code on that fridge.

code fridge

↓

I didn't leave a bit of my code on that fridge.

code fridge

↓

No remnants, nothing, so how do they know?

↓

No remnants, nothing, so how do they know?

↓

Then I realized...

realized

↓

Then I realized...

realized

↓

they're listening to us.

listening

↓

they're listening to us.

listening

↓

They've been listening to us this whole fucking time.

fucking listening whole whole-fucking

↓

They've been listening to us this whole fucking time.

fucking listening whole whole-fucking

↓

Right. All these devices

devices

↓

Right. All these devices

devices

↓

are listening to us!

listening

↓

are listening to us!

listening

↓

Okay, um...

↓

Okay, um...

↓

Gilfoyle, I-I think you need some rest.

rest

↓

Gilfoyle, I-I think you need some rest.

rest

↓

Not yet.

↓

Not yet.

↓

I checked their firmware and their logs.

checked logs

↓

I checked their firmware and their logs.

checked logs

↓

The fridge is set to record constantly

constantly fridge record

↓

The fridge is set to record constantly

constantly fridge record

↓

streaming everything back to the cloud.

cloud streaming

↓

streaming everything back to the cloud.

cloud streaming

↓

They must have gone through those audio logs,

audio gone logs must

↓

They must have gone through those audio logs,

audio gone logs must

↓

and listened to our conversations.

conversations listened

↓

and listened to our conversations.

conversations listened

↓

Wait, even if they aren't listening to us,

listening

↓

Wait, even if they aren't listening to us,

listening

↓

just the fact that they could be is interesting.

fact interesting

↓

just the fact that they could be is interesting.

fact interesting

↓

Shit.

↓

Shit.

↓

They make smoke detectors.

smoke

↓

They make smoke detectors.

smoke

↓

I think there's one in the kitchen.

kitchen

↓

I think there's one in the kitchen.

kitchen

↓

Those fuckers are listening.

fuckers listening

↓

Those fuckers are listening.

fuckers listening

↓

Jian-Yang, are-- are you copying

copying yang

↓

Jian-Yang, are-- are you copying

copying yang

↓

all those companies for the Chinese markets? Oh, no.

chinese companies markets

↓

all those companies for the Chinese markets? Oh, no.

chinese companies markets

↓

Gilfoyle: Fuck you, Seppen.

fuck

↓

Gilfoyle: Fuck you, Seppen.

fuck

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

Hey! Where have you been?

↓

Hey! Where have you been?

↓

Um, I stayed at Big Head's last night.

heads night stayed

↓

Um, I stayed at Big Head's last night.

heads night stayed

↓

Oh, God, I've been calling all night. Yeah.

calling night

↓

Oh, God, I've been calling all night. Yeah.

calling night

↓

I just didn't feel like getting reprimanded.

↓

I just didn't feel like getting reprimanded.

↓

I-I thought maybe you were locked

locked

↓

I-I thought maybe you were locked

locked

↓

in another Starbucks bathroom overnight.

another bathroom overnight starbucks

↓

in another Starbucks bathroom overnight.

another bathroom overnight starbucks

↓

One time, Jared. One time.

jared

↓

One time, Jared. One time.

jared

↓

Okay, you're just gonna have to catch up on the fly, then.

catch

↓

Okay, you're just gonna have to catch up on the fly, then.

catch

↓

On the fly, what?

↓

On the fly, what?

↓

Richard Hendricks,

richard

↓

Richard Hendricks,

richard

↓

this is Tom and Viola from Seppen. How do you do?

↓

this is Tom and Viola from Seppen. How do you do?

↓

Richard: Oh, hi. Alright, uh,

alright richard

↓

Richard: Oh, hi. Alright, uh,

alright richard

↓

we won't take up any more of your time.

↓

we won't take up any more of your time.

↓

Richard has called you in today, because...

called richard today

↓

Richard has called you in today, because...

called richard today

↓

of this.

↓

of this.

↓

Um, this is Seppen's Smart Fridge Terms of Service,

fridge service smart terms

↓

Um, this is Seppen's Smart Fridge Terms of Service,

fridge service smart terms

↓

where you specifically state

specifically state

↓

where you specifically state

specifically state

↓

that only refrigerator command-related user data

command data refrigerator related user

↓

that only refrigerator command-related user data

command data refrigerator related user

↓

will be uploaded to your cloud's service.

clouds service

↓

will be uploaded to your cloud's service.

clouds service

↓

That's correct.

correct

↓

That's correct.

correct

↓

We believe that the refrigerator is the hearth of the modern--

believe modern refrigerator

↓

We believe that the refrigerator is the hearth of the modern--

believe modern refrigerator

↓

Stop talking.

↓

Stop talking.

↓

We know your refrigerators are streaming

streaming

↓

We know your refrigerators are streaming

streaming

↓

all recorded audio to the cloud.

audio cloud recorded

↓

all recorded audio to the cloud.

audio cloud recorded

↓

Every single conversation.

conversation single

↓

Every single conversation.

conversation single

↓

Which is tantamount to illegal wiretapping.

illegal

↓

Which is tantamount to illegal wiretapping.

illegal

↓

You thought a mime performing fellatio was bad?

mime performing

↓

You thought a mime performing fellatio was bad?

mime performing

↓

What happens when your customers find out

customers happens

↓

What happens when your customers find out

customers happens

↓

that every single thing they've ever said

single

↓

that every single thing they've ever said

single

↓

in front of their "hearth" has been recorded?

front recorded

↓

in front of their "hearth" has been recorded?

front recorded

↓

Oh, shit.

↓

Oh, shit.

↓

We never listen to any recordings.

↓

We never listen to any recordings.

↓

Look, we never wanted to get into this tech stuff in the first place,

place stuff tech wanted

↓

Look, we never wanted to get into this tech stuff in the first place,

place stuff tech wanted

↓

but our marketing department insisted.

department insisted marketing

↓

but our marketing department insisted.

department insisted marketing

↓

Between us...

↓

Between us...

↓

Gavin Belson was the one that pushed us to sue you.

pushed

↓

Gavin Belson was the one that pushed us to sue you.

pushed

↓

Is there something we can do here?

↓

Is there something we can do here?

↓

This is a deal memo

deal memo

↓

This is a deal memo

deal memo

↓

stating that Pied Piper will fix your security issue,

issue piper security

↓

stating that Pied Piper will fix your security issue,

issue piper security

↓

and update your system

system update

↓

and update your system

system update

↓

to Pied Piper's stack in the future

future stack

↓

to Pied Piper's stack in the future

future stack

↓

which will lower your server costs

costs lower server

↓

which will lower your server costs

costs lower server

↓

and improve the security of your fridges.

improve security

↓

and improve the security of your fridges.

improve security

↓

In exchange, you drop the suit.

drop exchange suit

↓

In exchange, you drop the suit.

drop exchange suit

↓

Uh, Richard?

richard

↓

Uh, Richard?

richard

↓

Did I state that correctly? Is that our offer?

correctly offer state

↓

Did I state that correctly? Is that our offer?

correctly offer state

↓

Uh-huh. Yep.

↓

Uh-huh. Yep.

↓

I'd also like to tell you I have a Seppen bread machine,

bread machine

↓

I'd also like to tell you I have a Seppen bread machine,

bread machine

↓

and I have never been happier with an appliance.

happier

↓

and I have never been happier with an appliance.

happier

↓

Tom: Pleasure. Viola: Thank you so much.

pleasure

↓

Tom: Pleasure. Viola: Thank you so much.

pleasure

↓

Hey.

↓

Hey.

↓

I'm so sorry if I overstepped my bounds.

bounds

↓

I'm so sorry if I overstepped my bounds.

bounds

↓

It's just time was of the essence.

essence

↓

It's just time was of the essence.

essence

↓

Are you kidding me? Jared, you saved us.

jared kidding saved

↓

Are you kidding me? Jared, you saved us.

jared kidding saved

↓

And you did it without having to fuck Gilfoyle over.

fuck having

↓

And you did it without having to fuck Gilfoyle over.

fuck having

↓

Thanks! Yeah, um...

thanks

↓

Thanks! Yeah, um...

thanks

↓

We should talk about what they said about Gavin.

↓

We should talk about what they said about Gavin.

↓

Hello, Pied Piper!

piper

↓

Hello, Pied Piper!

piper

↓

Nice gender mix.

gender

↓

Nice gender mix.

gender

↓

Could use a little more color.

color

↓

Could use a little more color.

color

↓

Baby steps, right? Where do you want me?

baby steps

↓

Baby steps, right? Where do you want me?

baby steps

↓

What are you doing here? What are you talking about?

↓

What are you doing here? What are you talking about?

↓

Well, I-I said I'd call you.

↓

Well, I-I said I'd call you.

↓

I didn't say I was hiring you.

hiring

↓

I didn't say I was hiring you.

hiring

↓

Richard...

richard

↓

Richard...

richard

↓

I-I left Dana for you.

dana left

↓

I-I left Dana for you.

dana left

↓

I know. Ha!

↓

I know. Ha!

↓

I'm aware.

aware

↓

I'm aware.

aware

↓

But...

↓

But...

↓

let me try a little radical candor.

radical

↓

let me try a little radical candor.

radical

↓

Um, cheating on your CEO

cheating

↓

Um, cheating on your CEO

cheating

↓

and then blaming it all on me

blaming

↓

and then blaming it all on me

blaming

↓

is not really the kind of behavior I like to reward.

behavior reward

↓

is not really the kind of behavior I like to reward.

behavior reward

↓

Nor is pushing me to put my friend in jail.

friend jail pushing

↓

Nor is pushing me to put my friend in jail.

friend jail pushing

↓

Okay.

↓

Okay.

↓

You want candor, Richard?

richard

↓

You want candor, Richard?

richard

↓

You are objectively making a huge mistake.

huge huge-mistake mistake

↓

You are objectively making a huge mistake.

huge huge-mistake mistake

↓

I'm a world

world

↓

I'm a world

world

↓

And your heavy metal friend?

friend heavy metal

↓

And your heavy metal friend?

friend heavy metal

↓

I mean, he's obviously a dick.

dick obviously

↓

I mean, he's obviously a dick.

dick obviously

↓

And you know-- you know what else, Richard?

richard

↓

And you know-- you know what else, Richard?

richard

↓

You're 20 to 30 pounds underweight.

pounds

↓

You're 20 to 30 pounds underweight.

pounds

↓

It's gross.

gross

↓

It's gross.

gross

↓

Who was that? He seemed smart!

seemed smart

↓

Who was that? He seemed smart!

seemed smart

↓

Hey, Richard?

richard

↓

Hey, Richard?

richard

↓

I'm at least 45 pounds underweight.

least pounds

↓

I'm at least 45 pounds underweight.

least pounds

↓

Okay, and don't worry about him.

worry

↓

Okay, and don't worry about him.

worry

↓

We're gonna find you a much better COO.

↓

We're gonna find you a much better COO.

↓

I think we already have.

↓

I think we already have.

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

You want the job?

↓

You want the job?

↓

Jared, uh...

jared

↓

Jared, uh...

jared

↓

Alright, okay.

alright

↓

Alright, okay.

alright

↓

I'm okay. I know, just take it-- Everyone can see you.

↓

I'm okay. I know, just take it-- Everyone can see you.

↓

Oh my God. Yeah, let's have a seat.

seat

↓

Oh my God. Yeah, let's have a seat.

seat

↓

Just think about it. I'm okay!

↓

Just think about it. I'm okay!

↓

Yeah, let's...

↓

Yeah, let's...

↓

Do you want some water? Just breathe, just breathe.

breathe water

↓

Do you want some water? Just breathe, just breathe.

breathe water

↓

Seppen said that Gavin was pushing them to sue us, right?

pushing

↓

Seppen said that Gavin was pushing them to sue us, right?

pushing

↓

Uh, yeah, but that shouldn't be a surprise.

surprise

↓

Uh, yeah, but that shouldn't be a surprise.

surprise

↓

But Seppen had no idea that we broke in.

broke idea

↓

But Seppen had no idea that we broke in.

broke idea

↓

How the fuck did Gavin know?

fuck

↓

How the fuck did Gavin know?

fuck

↓

Right!

↓

Right!

↓

What? Are you suggesting that...

suggesting

↓

What? Are you suggesting that...

suggesting

↓

someone in here is leaking info to Gavin Belson?

info leaking

↓

someone in here is leaking info to Gavin Belson?

info leaking

↓

I am.

↓

I am.

↓

We have a mole on our hands.

hands mole

↓

We have a mole on our hands.

hands mole

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪

↓

What the fuck is going on over there?

fuck

↓

What the fuck is going on over there?

fuck

↓

Jeff : Um, yeah, bad news.

jeff news

↓

Jeff : Um, yeah, bad news.

jeff news

↓

Seppen just left, and-- and it looks like they're gonna settle.

left settle

↓

Seppen just left, and-- and it looks like they're gonna settle.

left settle

↓

Hey! Dude.

↓

Hey! Dude.

↓

We have a mole!

mole

↓

We have a mole!

mole

↓

("Cop Drama" by Clearside playing)

drama playing

↓

("Cop Drama" by Clearside playing)

drama playing

↓

You remember K

remember

↓

You remember K

remember

↓

-Of course! -K-Hole is

course hole

↓

-Of course! -K-Hole is

course hole

↓

euphoric about speaking to you regarding a deal.

deal regarding speaking

↓

euphoric about speaking to you regarding a deal.

deal regarding speaking

↓

That would put us months ahead.

ahead months

↓

That would put us months ahead.

ahead months

↓

LAURIE BREAM: Whatever you are doing, stop it now.

laurie

↓

LAURIE BREAM: Whatever you are doing, stop it now.

laurie

↓

This is not a done deal.

deal

↓

This is not a done deal.

deal

↓

Any word from our mole at Pied Piper?

mole piper word

↓

Any word from our mole at Pied Piper?

mole piper word

↓

We found the mole.

found mole

↓

We found the mole.

found mole

↓

How did the mole get all this information?

information mole

↓

How did the mole get all this information?

information mole

↓

By exploiting our most glaring weakness.

weakness

↓

By exploiting our most glaring weakness.

weakness

↓

♪ You were working As a waitress ♪

waitress working

↓

♪ You were working As a waitress ♪

waitress working

↓

♪ In a cocktail bar ♪

cocktail

↓

♪ In a cocktail bar ♪

cocktail

↓

♪ ♪

↓

♪ ♪