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Rick and Morty

Season 5, Episode 9 — Forgetting Sarick Mortshall

TMDB episode metadata
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It came as a shock to many...
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But with the power vacuum left by the heartless
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consumption of our dictator,
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we shall impose even more Draconian cookie law,
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one be-cookieing at a time!
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Hah!
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Oh, thank you!
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They took power immediately after you and your grandpa left.
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Err sorry about that, Rick doesn't really do
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'transition plans,' I-I think he was just hungry.
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Well, now with you here, perhaps a new system of government?
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King Morty --Sorry, look I gotta run,
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I-I'm sure you guys'll figure it out,
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I-I believe in you!
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Morty! Can you help us with this UFO-shaped hole?
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Sure, geez, but y'know only because
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I was in the neighborhood.
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Morty, thank God!
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The beast emerged right after your grandpa left
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and its gem went missing --Geez, that is a crazy coincidence
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that I-I if I were you, probably just best left alone.
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He's right. We-We should celebrate.
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Feast? No time.
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S-S-Sounds pretty classic though,
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don't let me hold you up!
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Son of a bitch. He marked it.
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Ah!
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Phew.
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Hah.
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What the --
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Hey, what the hell?
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Agh! Jesus!
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You got some of that green stuff on you too, huh?
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Th-Th-This is bad. Th-This is really bad.
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Hey, how do you think I feel?
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I had the ultimate stash hole and now I got a kid in my thigh.
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Look, you seem like a perfectly nice guy in my hand hole,
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but if I can't sort this out I'm dead --
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What the hell, dude? Gross.
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I-I-I was just trying to... You're just trying to what?
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Where'd this stuff come from?
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Garbage Goober, get out here and eat this garbage.
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Mmm, trash, I love trash, yum yum trash,
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I wanna eat trash --Hell yeah, I love that lil guy.
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Wait a minute.
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Is that Mountain Dew in my quantum transport solution?
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I-I saw you were marking the levels
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so I-I had to top it off."Top it off?"
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Do you know how dangerously toxic this stuff is?
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And you added it to my portal fluid?!
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Only because you don't trust me!
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Oh, that's great logic, Morty --
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forgive me for not doing the kissy chef gesture
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since you probably spilled this shit everywhere
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and I don't want to teleport my lips.
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I did I did not spill it!
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I won't take your word for that and I shouldn't have to,
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which is why I have sidekick rules.
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If you can't follow them --
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I can be replaced, yeah, yeah, so you keep telling me.
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Excuse me? Did you just try to call my bluff?
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Have you ever seen me bluff?
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Fine. You know what, replace me!
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Replace me, Rick! Just do it.
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Good luck finding someone that can be told
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80 thousand times how replaceable they are!
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Okay. I'll see your bluff call and raise you reality.
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I can't pretend I haven't been looking forward to this.
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Behold my Wheel of Better Things Than Morty.
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Wh-What are you eight? I-Is this macaroni art?
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You expect me to believe you built this
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because you don't care?
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No, I built this because I don't expect shit from you.
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Come on, anything!
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Anything but Morty, let's go!
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Come on baby, no whammies!
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Duh-duh-duh-duh stop!
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Okay, that's it. Two crows.
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-You're fired! -You know what? Eat shit.
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You're just trying to make me feel worthless.
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I never said you're worthless.
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In fact, I've given you a very
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Two crows.
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Note I didn't say three!
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Man, that is not a healthy relationship.
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I hope you don't mind me eavesdropping.
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Maybe we can figure out some sort of
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sound-proof bandage solution.
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Hey did Garbage Goober eat my porno magazines?
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So, were you like, a friend of Rick's?
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-Were you? -Good question.
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W-What's he doing, i-is he out there making sure
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you see him collecting two crows?
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And now you're thinking, gee, maybe if he cares enough
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to hurt me this bad...
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dot dot dot.
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Break the cycle, Morty.
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Change the things that you can change.
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That's what I did. And now I'm free.
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Only cramming six years into six minutes, fellas.
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Take your time!
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Now that's what I'm talking about!
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If ya nail this next one, I've got bird quaaludes.
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And I might even share.
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Y-You know you can stop doing that for my benefit.
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Y'know or-or keep doing it. Doesn't matter. I'm out.
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-I'm walking away. -Wait. Morty. Don't go.
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Not until you see this!
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Commence bird on a wire!
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Yeeeeaaaahhhhh!
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Jerk.
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Hey, let's hang out.
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We're like brothers now, we both got away y'know,
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w-where are you at?
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Ooh, you know what, shoot, can't.
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I'm an alien, um, so --That's okay,
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Rick turned my bike into a spaceship
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for "solo adventures" like picking up
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his Venusian foot ointment.
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God I'm seeing it so clearly now.
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Oh. Wait. I-It says here you're on Earth.
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Yeah. Ah. Don't come here. Why not?
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Look, I-I get it, my room is sometimes messy too,
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I'll-I'll pick you up right outside your...
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-...mental asylum. -Busted.
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You literally said "I'm free."
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I'm literally not free.
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Stop! That's my blanket!
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How do you know Rick?
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Look I came to your place with him one night
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after the bar closed.
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I started messing around in your garage
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and I spilled that portal stuff on me and he...
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kind of launched me to Australia...
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like with this weirdly primitive catapult, but --
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but the ammunition is an airtight carbon chamber,
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yeah, that-that -- that's how we lost our cable guy.
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Anyways, that kind of experience shakes you up.
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So, sorry I misled you, have a nice life.
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Nick. You got a visitor.
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Damn, what happened to you?
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The guards like to beat us on Sundays.
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Still better -than Mondays. -Geez, what happens then?
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They lick our faces when we're tied down.
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-Plus it's meat loaf day. -Well...
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-you're leaving now, buddy. -Whoa, whoa, whoa!
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I-I swiped 'em off the guard on my way in.
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I-I mean, sure, yeah, I could undo my lock, but then what?
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After the smartest guy in the world's done with ya,
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it's kinda hard to find a footing again.
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That's why I need to get you out of here.
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We're not the problem, he is.
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And if you can have a fresh start, then maybe I can too.
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It's not like it's a prison break.
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We're just leaving, like, a hospital
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that wants to help you extra bad.
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Follow me!
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Hey get back here, you better open this door!
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I can fly! Keep running, Nick.
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The more you sweat, the saltier your cheeks.
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-Lick this! -Thanks, Morty.
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That dude's got a tongue like a cat.
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Stop those Portal Boys!
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Did you hear that? That's gonna stick!
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Damn. Just like Jackie Chan!
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Hah! I guess that makes me Chris Tucker.
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I-I guess?
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Gonna get you!
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Holy shit! Did you see that?
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I mean you blinded a guy with puke!
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Oh, it was insane.
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-Gimme dap. -Am I doing it right?
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D-D-Did I give you a dap yet?
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Look at us. We got out.
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And not just from the asylum but from Rick.
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You get to say what an adventure is now.
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You still got that list?
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Dude, we can't do that stuff without Rick's tech.
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Then it's time the Portal Boys get themselves a portal gun.
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Remember your training, crows.
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The idol should be around that corner!
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Do you guys just follow training when you feel like it?
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That's not being trained, that's being dicks.
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Ah, now I see. The real treasure is empathy.
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And that's worth way more than any knick-knack.
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You guys just earned yourselves another adventure!
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The adventure is, you're fired.
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Sorry, guys, if I wanted another bleeding heart,
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I'd inject reanimator serum into an actual bleeding heart.
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Relax, this is an avian planet
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with 40 million species of bird,
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even one day of working under me
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will make you apex geniuses down there.
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Now hop into these pneumatic canisters
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they used to use at bank drive-thrus in the '70s.
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What the... Hey! Who's tractor beaming me?!
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Nobody tractor beams me --
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Nobody descrambles my tractor beam scrambler to boot.
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Sorry for the tractor beaming,
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but did you lose these two crows?
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Oh, uh, yeah, no I-I dropped 'em off 'cause
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I-I can't hold a candle to them.
7e84b867-c60d-42fa-aa1b-bae6b5853ac2.gif
Y'know it s-seemed like a -- the decent thing to do.
740465fa-69a0-4e62-875a-5baceac622d4.gif
Be your crows. Train yourself.
4d41b4a1-fc0e-446d-8b44-81b36888e840.gif
Crows are then trained.
dcbe7bbd-42fc-4526-87a7-e63b45c542b1.gif
I'm open to what you're describing if it's easier
7ee4efdf-b84a-46d0-8c6c-26dd244f4bbe.gif
than wiping an unearned smirk off my grandson's face.
cc84a09f-c70b-417c-97e6-5079c33edd1d.gif
-W-What do I do? -Look at your crows.
601ffce5-b935-4b78-8011-28e61e10410c.gif
Be your crows.
4b0c8b70-2b28-457c-b01c-48c4b76cfe92.gif
God I am so glad I'm a primate.
1d4aa0a8-650d-468f-9214-8e958fe3c224.gif
Fine. Looking at my crows.
86360b62-68ef-43a0-aaee-0bd271adbe68.gif
We train ourselves to stop training.
66a027fb-9a64-45a2-b766-d8badca6edd9.gif
The trained are untrained, we are untrained.
c82d4541-1861-4401-af98-69a600732796.gif
All training is complete.
2d1bedd7-5025-405c-8b3e-e28574a23c71.gif
Because no training was needed.
8e7c42b9-2578-4fcc-aff7-9bf60c18dcfa.gif
My God. I-I get it, now.
93fde874-f15a-44b6-a343-3ce10c826357.gif
We are gonna shove this crow shit down Morty's throat!
2614e89d-d8d4-4512-b15b-f22062f3e87d.gif
Nick, m-maybe this isn't a good idea.
6dea88f4-91fc-4243-9482-74158b9e1dbe.gif
L-Like what if he catches us?
2eec661a-5188-41a4-befc-fc6eef953394.gif
He could trap me in -a Matrix again. -Listen to yourself.
b35b45ca-fd2c-447b-8b6b-c58e21e853eb.gif
We wouldn't even be in this situation
20b1902f-13b6-45aa-b526-39f11e057e89.gif
if the dude hadn't fucked us both over.
85468e2f-a483-4e84-9f90-3cd1d1b28701.gif
Damn it. He must be showing the gun off
d1e566a2-a15f-42b0-88d9-e90315c1a39e.gif
to his stupid crows -- i-it's not fair!
d5802617-aa1b-47e0-b94c-39c416b28fed.gif
It's okay, we can still liberate all this other stuff.
4ca1fa41-7aa3-4519-a7e3-de0721d43e53.gif
Let's only grab what we need, though.
b3993799-8ed5-4c84-baff-332aa1334fb6.gif
Oh, no. Shit. That's Rick's can crusher!
9a11758c-5009-4524-80f8-d2a21fba21d1.gif
H-He spent three weeks perfecting that.
b442157b-6c1a-4e03-8c21-7030121799be.gif
Morty, buddy, you forget that we're in this together.
42c6bdf4-67ab-4bae-b70e-7dea1006c4e2.gif
Besides, tell me that didn't feel the slightest bit good.
036067e8-5aaf-4546-af10-13f43c4f7751.gif
I mean yeah, but w-we can't do that again.
e03fad77-bf5c-4084-a822-780a4f9116e1.gif
Why the hell not?
5ed81c22-1c3d-462f-a199-7a9b6d400ec8.gif
Whoa!
1694dfff-b4d2-44d0-9fc4-19a8fd6fc075.gif
Haha!
e6c6f87e-f5a3-4058-b2b2-7fd342822d27.gif
Here we go, bitch!
9ad1d95a-3d35-4a27-8018-d16b23b42e74.gif
Son, have you fallen in with a weird stranger
d4e65bad-3f97-4279-b4d5-5a71282cef64.gif
and are now trashing your grandpa's place?
9bb4b963-d183-4585-bb41-a647277c0ff8.gif
'Cause I'll help!
ab29bb0d-4bf7-4bb4-8694-77488a6886f7.gif
Dad? Psh, whatever, man.
1bcc7015-af29-4856-9091-61882e7b2b19.gif
Ah. Yeah! Yeah! Now eat my ass, Rick!
0333271f-c70e-4145-8e50-341d90b46a04.gif
Suck it, Sanchez!
7fc04df8-2104-4d79-8bce-8369c7028b5e.gif
Morty, is that what I think it is?
0b7ee96e-deb6-4f64-a0ab-3693bf731cda.gif
I mean, it's the equivalent of an iPhone 3
be266107-8399-40b1-955b-91cc4cbfcba1.gif
And it's empty but it means the Portal Boys be portal-ing!
57fa1f1d-3414-4f9c-bca8-c022a6ceea23.gif
Rick incoming.
3dfc57b6-3b06-4626-9d23-223240dbfa8f.gif
Oh, crap, we better skedaddle!
6a1ad9e8-78e9-49db-aa9b-6e3947cc88c5.gif
Moooooorty.
4ba71a92-2ff3-47cc-a5fe-948ed4f213ee.gif
But what about my dad, he-he's like a-a...
5f4fa37e-66f4-4425-b31d-1422038b2ac5.gif
-puddle. -You heard the garage,
12b747af-cf5c-4fe9-ac58-8c925cde9e18.gif
Rick'll turn him back into a solid when he gets here!
5719f444-6a80-4479-bb0a-4dd8a7d2aefa.gif
Sorry, Dad, gotta go be heroes.
794bfbaa-6781-40ae-bb8e-c5d218209c64.gif
G-Gonna take your car, love you!
bfb4b80c-67fd-4214-ac8d-f58780ac4dc2.gif
That's us down there with the poop brown roof.
ad3b8c0f-4929-4679-a7d7-6b8066ce2931.gif
-What is that? -Oh. Ha. That?
474918c1-589b-4168-8cb3-ca96f71dfa6f.gif
T-That's...nothing.
f5d944f3-5f18-4534-8762-9d2259dc1d65.gif
But I see "Two Crows" written right here beside...
c7885598-8b2e-4c9e-8025-1e803bb7aadf.gif
Gene with donkey brains, half a Paul Giamatti, and...
b959b91c-ea50-4025-9417-9d846ce96141.gif
sentient shit.
2f794919-6903-4d8a-a7e7-eeca0f307f7f.gif
I guess the "joke" being that crows are stupid?
ea1a27c6-9be0-4f6b-901b-0a83db5f7ab9.gif
I think it's a little more nuanced than that.
a55de06e-8f09-4e0a-ae31-a1b2e8907046.gif
Right, because you just learned
5a554bb3-cb1b-4bd7-a63a-5ea1c73d2a96.gif
empathy from us 10 minutes ago
6e4ba6e0-8c8f-4e6c-bed0-ff18f02ee999.gif
but now we're going to learn we don't get your humor?
f312982a-11f2-4946-9d05-decd9190bb72.gif
Fucking horse shit.
52c0ae13-b0dd-4abc-a55c-3639f971c55d.gif
Yeah, there's not a ton to "get," genius,
4fb9775a-7bdb-4f2d-95f7-cc46f9830ad9.gif
the "joke" is your grandson was so replaceable
e9c98764-3443-4c2f-ba7f-1705b3997315.gif
that "even" two crows could do it.
c0188920-c143-4a66-9e79-7937a85a0e56.gif
Haha. It's funny except it's not.
329cd4cc-750a-42c0-a44a-74cefd294752.gif
Right, well, to be honest, that is how I felt at the time.
f68b8932-f3e4-4989-9d0a-2d5bdec4cebb.gif
But I've-I've rounded a corner.
acf9ebad-32bb-49a6-949d-0ca6f17426f5.gif
I seriously have, you guys.
c84c17d8-e51c-420c-a4c8-da71cdf1f6fe.gif
Well, now it's time to round the corner of death!
afbed895-3fb0-422e-a490-b1a265c59d34.gif
Let the crow-volutionbegin.
45ea436a-33b4-4c6b-9142-a1287c93f7c1.gif
Aah!
6e1320a6-c606-49bf-bfc8-aa2cf0f1bdad.gif
Aw, that sound. What have you done?
cdbb74a7-aafa-4c5f-9bfa-05ff58838ea6.gif
Turned crows against dozens of humans in a 300 meter radius.
baf118b2-c794-483b-a56a-b9f8728d507c.gif
Heeeelllllp... pleaseee...
763675d5-50aa-4ad5-86b6-32c5c4117576.gif
Oh, now you beg for help?
4fefa07f-c906-448f-9e70-f161d95d75d1.gif
-That wasn't me. -What do you mean?
1129286a-34c5-494e-91a7-e6bb6cb72bce.gif
Dooooown here.
1f29a685-7bde-49dc-83a5-fdea480eace2.gif
Jerry, what the fuck? Why are you a puddle?
76ea67e0-2ec5-4af7-a32b-d03dcf788f5b.gif
You don't deserve these!
515339b8-f0dc-41a1-b23a-1a7e08a35250.gif
-Haha. -Genius.
f21d7e5c-acfe-4838-842a-9300eef68c72.gif
Caaatch you at a baaad time? Yeah, Jerry.
94e89502-4db3-4e61-9ae0-2c6aff697766.gif
They took my goddamn crows!
9f0c8549-abe5-45bc-9528-5ae272539aae.gif
Not now, Garbage Goober! Get back in your hole!
8e64f115-45c7-450b-bdc8-af59edc67f0b.gif
Hohoho, our first adventure!
bd8864a5-6999-4077-af52-659c6f3342dd.gif
This definitely the place?
51864178-46dd-4835-9a22-c3904adb2c29.gif
Yeah, Rick's been ripping these guys off for years,
6a395afb-aba3-4900-9cf7-3418e977859b.gif
they'll-they'll be really -
3b772324-ed5a-40de-85c1-2dfc4d666523.gif
uh, grateful.
a81ba5a7-710b-42d0-be45-9957a926132c.gif
Y'know, there --Let's just get that fluid, bud.
9f242da8-20bc-4db2-a49e-c0f8a2959d4c.gif
The Portal Boys are about to be in portal business!
3f91d085-ca0c-4a33-a2fd-e6bbb3b7bd88.gif
Here he is.
b17356bb-eb7f-49a9-b531-6f9b8f72cb36.gif
This rat was skimming your crystal harvest
6fb4b214-ea7f-4997-9510-fc0941ba5dde.gif
and sending it to a spaceman named Rick Sanchez.
1175c9bb-2979-4ad4-a4f1-f5e973b25b78.gif
-Bastard! -Screw Rick! Kick his dick!
e6b7872e-3190-4c3f-ae08-c9e0f69db75c.gif
Yeah, right?! But me and Nick here, we-we put a stop to that.
ba6a8f07-32f6-49f9-9796-ddd7eebb800f.gif
The people of Kuntak thank you.
fb5e8963-f396-4fdb-9639-ef583b794303.gif
He's a bad guy, right?
a9e2ba88-8e0c-4058-a9ad-6cf68fe516e9.gif
Y-You're gonna bring him to justice?
af2321b8-77de-40ad-9b52-8e2111fca23a.gif
Yeah, of course.
e80e8747-2517-4dbf-a6ee-2892381a9bf3.gif
Uh, okay, p-pleasure doing business!
ebb140e7-0666-41ef-8635-f78ba84f7d8b.gif
Not so fast, Morty.
0f01194b-0cf4-4135-9324-aa207706001c.gif
We're not leaving until we get what we came for.
2f39065d-f1fd-421e-87a6-ed7053762c83.gif
Funny, I'm prepared to.
d5dc74a7-8067-42d7-b7a7-d94c1414d7fe.gif
So hey, look, wh-what we want is portal fluid.
f1aa0abb-1b3b-4bea-85bd-9913861e0078.gif
As our thanks.
be18d45c-4320-4581-8f44-452d18eca521.gif
Portal fluid?
bf1a982e-085e-4e37-8193-fdd344bf57c7.gif
You think I'd live in a lizard mine if I had portal fluid?
e58865df-11fb-46c8-852f-1b2efb32b823.gif
Right, ok, or we could just kill you for it.
b57ac46b-1189-42be-8815-48ad792651ee.gif
He's kidding. He's -- t-the Portal Boys
f8af1389-e948-4656-bfcf-b3027ffe3809.gif
-only kill with kindness. -And with guns.
e1f55210-b031-4ff0-aff1-6235e05a3cbc.gif
Oh, no. Oh, no. I-I'm not the one shooting!
055aef03-4465-437c-8c08-57cc77d10795.gif
-Kill them! -I'm sorry.
de907be8-fbec-4d71-a604-30f1034cb780.gif
Stop! Stop! They're unarmed!
d1d9d949-dbe2-4131-82b8-2d2d698cc523.gif
Ahh! What the fuck?!
6be41031-1c6c-421a-8b62-742741de2fa8.gif
Morty! Morty!
932f85a6-0b9e-40f5-bff7-9c7df12de03c.gif
Cool place ya got here. Very Dark Crystal meets Hot Topic.
34718ad2-b82a-4b50-972a-fd4f4fec1f5b.gif
Now where are my damn crows?
88d4ea77-557e-4bcd-bbdd-2e37102f0375.gif
Seriously?
91478271-8012-4fed-844d-3f65f61235f0.gif
Is there anything not on theme here?
57369a24-c1a7-4ef7-9142-a81edbc1cc1b.gif
Even now your primate storms our ship to assert his dominance.
34fdf89f-baec-4e49-827f-1ef69bb24bf4.gif
Touch the sacred egg and ascend.
c54b0f76-972c-48a2-849f-a680c5f4b464.gif
No longer shall you take orders from this beast.
1910e3ed-f7ce-41da-be1c-29b3e4ddc21d.gif
But taking orders from you i-is fine?
2e3a8562-3f94-41d2-adee-6672a4091d0f.gif
Silence, Ape!
56c5cfa9-f721-4673-8bbd-4ad96029a0e1.gif
C'mon, if you think my crows are gonna leave the great thing
c6121dde-010b-4bc6-9298-e8777d2a3dd5.gif
we have for whatever high fantasy bullshit this is?
4083e680-67d4-4a23-9698-4c398d6dc34b.gif
You 're wrong. R-Right, guys?
90802856-08e3-4de4-a7a2-3ab485128301.gif
Th-This is seriously a toss-up.
d02124c0-3c2a-44aa-bb44-182edb073983.gif
Uh...someone wanna get that?
f2b8b5a5-822b-436e-98ad-7b8776f4d3a0.gif
Oh. It's me, isn't it?
ca17abc0-0dd3-46a5-a8dd-759590852900.gif
Woof.
55255dea-41d0-4f49-af9b-eaeaddf9ff5d.gif
Lemme just make sure it's not an emergency...
b462ad12-235b-48ea-9119-cbcd57450b72.gif
-Yello. -Rick, I'm so sorry, I-I messed up big!
042b7743-bcd3-4475-a38f-146b03c8e655.gif
Morty? It's okay, y-ya can't be worse off than me.
b482bf76-0447-4a15-9d53-929cb5174320.gif
I-I got portal splashed, robbed you,
16b54d44-a5b4-4c17-a97d-5867591e0ab2.gif
jumped into a rebound with a psycho,
d2b247b1-fdfc-4d65-adac-ac7c00cbc907.gif
and-and left a trail of dead!
ce75b505-d846-4ea2-a8d8-df58071d2ee0.gif
Wow, somebody's been busy.
42a8808a-be4a-40ce-947d-0436db4625a4.gif
I-I did it 'cause you hurt my feelings
3e98a8b3-1a49-429d-87e8-38704edacb4a.gif
w-when you chose the two crows!
02a72ff5-1cb0-440b-8ee2-32604dccfdd6.gif
Jesus, it was a bit, I'm getting my ass kicked
41928ef1-55d8-413d-9b96-4a79da4a17b8.gif
by this dumb fucking crow story, it's all gone tits up.
bcdba060-cfb5-4a34-9298-80d538e4013b.gif
Ha, okay, I-I miss you, man.
18949df9-a1a5-4504-b29b-5330d22c13b3.gif
Uh, goddamn it, might've been a bit too frank there.
7ce10ac8-360b-4f72-a47f-17f9d29af5fc.gif
Yeah... gonna have to call ya back.
dbae5093-dfaf-4e28-be22-53945739b986.gif
Ahh! Gah!
ab79967d-2ee1-4aee-819c-03c1a87c496f.gif
Tiny-handed little brat --
425793d0-723b-4d03-a3a6-19406689147d.gif
You think you can fuck with me and get away with it?!
b7565e4f-4855-4e53-9d84-697d60412aa6.gif
Then you don't know Nick.
7ee804a4-424e-4025-b250-8839717b1cc1.gif
Busted. You don't get it, do you?
540f3568-6dad-4235-9bbf-2d9b304217f8.gif
As long as we have these portals,
e934bc9f-af99-4ab7-a762-16374c914d45.gif
you can never escape me.
890eb1a3-2a19-480e-840c-dfea63a9f0e9.gif
What the hell, man.
2d168775-ebce-4734-b840-7d343779df5b.gif
I-I thought we were both victims of Rick's abuse.
0710c1f5-1cfb-4a1d-b27d-dc0f973ecc43.gif
Maybe we are, maybe we're not.
67380024-72c0-4835-bb77-7bcba6374253.gif
Maybe we both just drink at the same bar
ad23dcaf-bca3-478f-8fd8-95f4ab53c7b0.gif
and maybe one night I tried to take his portal gun.
177dc2fd-c661-457e-9c16-91946b54c85a.gif
See I thought Rick was my ticket to something special,
a4b4bf51-9777-45a9-aa25-b8f634424030.gif
but it turns out you were, Morty.
98737477-f626-4be5-83fa-fcf73147d372.gif
And look at me now -- I'm a Portal Boy.
3f6f9ebc-899b-44a2-94f5-bb05ec396b4f.gif
That name sucks! I was just trying to yes-and!
b66b6c07-e19b-4412-82c5-ec3177b230c9.gif
You don't get it, Morty.
767ae009-6257-48e0-bff0-82ac6ae87cd8.gif
We're partners.
85a5ecf7-58f3-4bbf-990b-26de62d9cd94.gif
Now fall in line or I'll make your life a living hell.
202c7c06-f98c-4159-a354-4b69cfd89cf1.gif
No...thank...you.
3980ce32-463f-4178-8ca0-566f896cdeb6.gif
Pity, I can't have you connected to me if you're not on my side.
2aeda949-39f8-4e45-99e5-bd5d0f0fff35.gif
That means I gotta kill you.
a0a54ba0-0d1f-4ca7-bb23-bcdb3b618fa8.gif
The thing is, I already got a partner,
774596d2-fda1-44ea-aeeb-a38059414f96.gif
and there's no room for promotions.
c01026a0-b750-4026-90b8-e3f857c2b67a.gif
What the fuck did you just do?
d211f36a-6757-481a-ab0a-4e615744beac.gif
Cut you out of my life.
33ab2289-747a-46d1-9c68-21bb0e36d96a.gif
Ahhh!
175d33df-b837-428d-8ad0-661d59b68b41.gif
See how quickly your allies abandon you, Rick Sanchez?
f5420a48-2410-4b58-8421-d9f2c0c60808.gif
Lucky for me, abandonment's my bread and butter.
76749e40-4d77-42af-9712-d9132d1f59dd.gif
Oh, shit. You were supposed to die!
a28ebeee-fe46-4302-8310-fd4f689aa220.gif
I gotta hand it to you...
548bd61f-5762-44a0-8968-d8b8527b5a5e.gif
I was iffy about this one but crow tech slaps!
15f7f83d-56d6-4192-b75e-1435b71457e9.gif
Finish him, you fools!
1ea33d51-a929-4329-97a6-a5a2e2b04a9c.gif
Go ahead. Do it.
a13fee13-24ed-4168-a0a2-04372d873621.gif
You guys look so rad.
1e0c4137-296b-4d9d-840e-fba35fe10489.gif
I deserve to go out this way!
c9798163-d6de-47b5-b405-3f4decfda9d0.gif
Bird...qua...luudes. -Done.
07f8a40e-ffaa-4215-95c8-e98c12360ce1.gif
Oh, my god, that was awesome.
ca1b7e93-d4f7-432a-8418-3399983d1c6c.gif
Y-You could've killed me back there.
8a93d918-f658-4b23-8eac-ccbf1539c28a.gif
H-How did you guys ever forgive me?
18330a50-2edf-402e-a611-2f05288727be.gif
Right, 'cause this toxic thing
19ee3ae9-7325-4a1e-87f4-f77b3d380173.gif
I have with Morty doesn't define us.
f97c9fac-73a9-4db1-b8d9-1b43c43c7589.gif
Man, crows are empathetic as fuck!
fdbb4d73-d899-4e19-806e-82ca8e21f56d.gif
Definitely saving this one!
5c491d55-58b5-4d93-aa3e-ad319cb92dfe.gif
Rick and two crows!
28a82149-e261-46ad-9bdc-a128e3dd2212.gif
Oh, my god, Morty.
d0c38e34-4670-4cbd-ad77-99ebdfc578d2.gif
Here, here come here l-let-let grandpa fix you up,
ac1c46a1-12b3-4ea0-a40a-37a251c907de.gif
What do you want, a robot hand? A lizard hand?
79c3d750-1f97-4df5-9d36-587f18c18c45.gif
I can make it big again like that one time?
bef2b82e-5c4c-45f1-8d51-9ec8665f8b2a.gif
Just my regular hand!
f2630742-a85f-4993-85c1-06e9e467890e.gif
Right, not a time for bits, I get it.
573d9822-8b3b-491d-afb8-66962c677c47.gif
There ya go, good as new.
b2883dd3-3b6b-4e22-8643-b589f5fe7357.gif
So we're like, back-back, right?
6cd8c8df-d001-4533-8565-53f17b722b48.gif
Rick and Morty, together again.
c9cb5d3b-2a8c-4348-a0d4-4ca5ccd42b39.gif
Fu-Full reset? No.
cad11521-83ab-48d9-84f4-976ae2823193.gif
No, Morty, I think we're done.
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Be-Because I spilled the portal fluid and didn't tell you?
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No, Morty. 'Cause you were too afraid to tell me.
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What we had was abusive. Don't you see?
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I'm a bad partner because I never made you a true partner.
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The crows made me see that.
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I thought they were a joke like you,
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but it turns out they're more enlightened than any of us.
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O-Okay? And-And what's the undercut?
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You're not hearing me.
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I will never be the same so I need to leave with the crows
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and see what more they can teach me.
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Oh. Oh.
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Here, I want you to have this.
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Oh, wow I...
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You know what, Rick? You really have changed.
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Thanks, Morty.
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I'll always be your grandpa, Morty.
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Just kinda obsessed with crows now.
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♪ Every day the sun burns brighter ♪
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♪ With you by my side
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♪ And that we go on forever
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♪ Together you and I
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Aww shit! Rick and two crows!
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Kicking off my new franchise!
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The galaxy is our telephone wire!
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We'll do a thousand seasons,
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14 episodes each, 9-9 seconds a pop
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because that's the future of viewing --
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shows on your shoes -- Sneaki!
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That's when you've got everybody's attention --
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when they're putting crap on their feet.
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That's when they wanna laugh. Cry.
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Or feel anything besides a shoe going on their foot!
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Watch sitcoms on your sneakers!
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The Rick and Two Crows Show,
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we're gonna be layin' -- layin' walnuts on the road
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for car tires to open em' you know what I mean?
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Forever, it's Rick and two crows, forever!
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♪ Oh, we go on
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♪ You by my side
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♪ Forever
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♪ You and I
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♪ We wreaked hell
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♪ Every night
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♪ Together
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♪ You and I
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♪ Running on
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♪ Borrowed time
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♪ Forever
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♪ You and I
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Where do you think you're going?
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Oh, well, ya know...
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the-the red light usually means there's...
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garbage...
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Did you seriously not talk to Rick yet?
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I kinda hinted at it.
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L-Look, I know it's not the job
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I came here for but it's an honest living.
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Goddamn it, Harold.
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What do they call you -- Garbage Goober?
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You are a doctor for god sakes!
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Look, I don't know how I let this happen
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but I-I've let it play out so long that I can't stop now.
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You're a coward.
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You're right. This ends here and now.
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Garbage Goober, we got freshy trash trash for ya!
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Extra stinky just the way you like it!
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Mmm, trash, I love trash...
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yum yum trash, I wanna eat trash.
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Did you get any of that?