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Home » South Park » S03E14 — The Red Badge of Gayness

South Park

Season 3, Episode 14 — The Red Badge of Gayness

TMDB episode metadata
Show: South Park
Episode title: The Red Badge of Gayness
Air date: November 24, 1999
Director: Trey Parker
Top billed cast: Trey Parker, Matt Stone, Isaac Hayes, Mary Kay Bergman, Mona Marshall, Eliza Schneider
South Park's Civil War reenactment, sponsored by "Jagerminz S'More Flavored Schnapps," gets out of hand. Cartman persuades the drunken lot to defeat the northerners so that he can win a bet with Kyle and Stan that will make them his slaves for one month.
Source: TMDB
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Yeah, he doesn't even know that the South
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loses the Civil War.
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It's gonna be rad having Cartman be our slave.
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And with that, let's all head to Tamarack Hill
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and put on a good show!
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Yeah!
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Welcome to the South Park Reenactment of
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the Battle of Tamarack Hill.
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The men in gray are the Confederacy from the South.
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In the blue, the Union from the North.
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It was a cold morning in 1862.
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The Union army had to get the Bell of Appomattox
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down from Tamarack Hill.
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What ensued was a bloody battle,
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but after many hours, the Union army prevailed.
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Here now is the reenactment of that great battle.
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Forward!
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Let's bring those Confederate bastards down!
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Fire!
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Alright, men, fire!
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Hey, I shot you, Ned. You have to fall down.
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Ow.
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Yeah!
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Wow, so this is what it was like.
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Hey, what's that guy doing?
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Whee-hee! Long live the Confederacy!
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Huh?
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What the hell?
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Hey, he took the bell!
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He can't do that!
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The Confederacy doesn't take the bell!
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Hooray for the South!
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Cartman, you can't do that!
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God damn it, now we have to start over.
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Alrighty, everyone.
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We're going to do the entire reenactment again
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because of some confusion over the bell.
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Now, I know you're just trying to help, Eric,
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but we have to let the Union army capture the bell this time.
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But why? Why should they get the bell?
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Well...'cause we're supposed to lose.
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But we don't have to lose. - What?
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Gentlemen, we can win this battle.
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Sure, we could lose,
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and tonight we could go back to our families
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and say, "we did it. We lost like we were supposed to.
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Aren't we proud?"
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Or...or we take that hill,
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