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Home » South Park » S03E14 — The Red Badge of Gayness

South Park

Season 3, Episode 14 — The Red Badge of Gayness

TMDB episode metadata
Show: South Park
Episode title: The Red Badge of Gayness
Air date: November 24, 1999
Director: Trey Parker
Top billed cast: Trey Parker, Matt Stone, Isaac Hayes, Mary Kay Bergman, Mona Marshall, Eliza Schneider
South Park's Civil War reenactment, sponsored by "Jagerminz S'More Flavored Schnapps," gets out of hand. Cartman persuades the drunken lot to defeat the northerners so that he can win a bet with Kyle and Stan that will make them his slaves for one month.
Source: TMDB
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we take that hill, and when we stand tall upon it,
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we hold our heads high, and we yell,
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"Not this year!
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This year belongs to the Confederacy!"
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By God, he's right! - Jimbo!
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No, I've been reenacting this war for 22 years now.
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And for 22 years, us Confederate reenactors
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have had to spend the evening being ridiculed and made fun of
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by the Union reenactors.
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Well, I'm sick of it!
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Yeah, why do we have to be their bitches
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every year?
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I'm tired of losing this battle.
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And I say it's high time we kicked some ass!
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Who's with me?
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Yeah!
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Alright, folks, sorry for the false start.
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We're ready to go again.
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It was a cold morning in 1862.
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The Union army had--
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What the hell?
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You're not gonna live to see another day!
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Uh, what are they doing?
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You yankee sons of bitches!
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Ow! That hurt!
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Damn it, what the hell are they doing?!
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What do we do?
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Run for your life, dude!
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God bless those men that fight for their freedom.
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God bless those men and God bless the Confederacy!
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Surrender your men, General!
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Jimbo, have you lost your mind?
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Surrender your men, General!
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Alright, alright, we surrender!
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The South wins?
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The South wins!
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God damn it!
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Well, we can all be friends now.
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Come on, Randy, have some S'more Schnapps.
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I can't be happy. You ruined the reenactment.
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Aw, come on, have a little sip.
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So, you guys about ready to start being my slaves?
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You cheated, Cartman!
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Yeah, and it doesn't matter because the bet was
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that the South doesn't win the war.
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And the South still didn't win the war, dipshit.
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Yeah, too bad you're such a dumbass at history,
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or you would have known that.
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