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South Park

Season 2, Episode 8 — Summer Sucks

TMDB episode metadata
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God damn it, where the did you put Mr. Hat?
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Oh, no, you don't.
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The school year's over,
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but summer vacation doesn't start
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for you little bastards
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until Mr. Hat is back on my desk.
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Now, I'm gonna turn around,
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and when I turn back, I expect to see
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Mr. Hat lying right here.
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Okay.
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I'm gonna turn around now.
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Shit! - Where did everybody go?
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Hooray! - Summer!
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Oh, golly, Kevin, honey!
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- Good to see you again, son.
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- Looks like winter's right around the corner.
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Better get some firewood ready.
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Oh, happy summer, gentlemen. - Shut up, Pip.
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Righto. Enjoy some of the summer for me, would you?
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What do you mean? - Well, I have to spend
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my summer in summer school because I can't be left alone.
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You see, my parents are dead.
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Your parents are dead?
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Goddamn, you suck, Pip.
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Oh, yeah, dude. It's summer.
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That means we gotta buy fireworks.
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I saved up enough money to buy M-80s this year.
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I saw this movie once where this guy stuck
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a firecracker up a cat's butt.
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Cool, maybe we can do that to Cartman's cat.
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Hey! If you so much as touch Kitty's ass,
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I'll put firecrackers in your nut sack
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and blow your balls all over your pants.
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Jesus, Cartman.
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- Hi, fellas. - Hi, Stu.
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What can I do for you? - We want to buy M-80s.
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The kind that fit in Cartman's cat's ass.
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Okay, that's it!
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Screw you guys, I'm going home. - What a baby.
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So we'll have ten M-80s please.
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I'm sorry, fellas.
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Haven't you heard? - Heard what?
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All fireworks have been banned in Colorado.
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What do you mean?
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It was in the paper this morning.
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Dude, just 'cause some stupid North Park kid
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blew his hands off, we don't get to buy M-80s?
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Right. - How can they do this to us?