Home » Scrubs » S05E14 — My Own Personal Hell

Scrubs

Season 5, Episode 14 — My Own Personal Hell

It was a beautiful day, so I invited Elliot over to my half-acre

#1

⇓

It was a beautiful day, so I invited Elliot over to my half-acre

#2

⇓

for some friendly sunbathing.

#3

⇓

for some friendly sunbathing.

#4

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Unfortunately, she brought Keith.

#5

⇓

Thanks for doing that.

#6

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Thanks for doing that.

#7

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I'd do it, but the Bobbsey Twins are already loose.

#8

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No worries. It's not that homoerotic, is it?

#9

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No worries. It's not that homoerotic, is it?

#10

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Oh, God, no.

#11

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Oh, God, no.

#12

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Keith didn't know I mildly disliked him.

#13

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Keith didn't know I mildly disliked him.

#14

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He also didn't know I was rubbing Crisco on his back.

#15

⇓

Does it smell like pie crust?

#16

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That's the rhododendron, Keith.

#17

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That's the rhododendron, Keith.

#18

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Everybody knows they smell like pie when they bloom.

#19

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Everybody knows they smell like pie when they bloom.

#20

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- Hey, nice new watch, J.D. - Thank you.

#21

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It wasn't a watch. Now that Elliot had gotten serious,

#22

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It wasn't a watch. Now that Elliot had gotten serious,

#23

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I needed to get tighter with Turk.

#24

⇓

I needed to get tighter with Turk.

#25

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Since he's so busy being married and trying to make a baby,

#26

⇓

Since he's so busy being married and trying to make a baby,

#27

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I had only one option.

#28

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Come in, Brown Bear.

#29

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I got watchie-talkies.

#30

⇓

I got watchie-talkies.

#31

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- Hey, White Shadow. - That's not my handle.

#32

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Hey, Gizmo.

#33

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Right on. What are you doin'?

#34

⇓

Right on. What are you doin'?

#35

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I'm about to take out the Slip 'n Slide.

#36

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Dude, I can't. It's baby-making time.

#37

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Dude, I can't. It's baby-making time.

#38

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- How's it going with Keith? - Awesome. Check this.

#39

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- How's it going with Keith? - Awesome. Check this.

#40

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Bacon back! Classic!

#41

⇓

Bacon back! Classic!

#42

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Hey, stud. You ready to fertilise an egg?

#43

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Hey, stud. You ready to fertilise an egg?

#44

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Gotta go. Maintain radio silence on all channels.

#45

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Gotta go. Maintain radio silence on all channels.

#46

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A local magazine named Dr Cox the best doctor in the city.

#47

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A local magazine named Dr Cox the best doctor in the city.

#48

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Dr Cox felt this was big news.

#49

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Here's how it's going to work, people.

#50

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Here's how it's going to work, people.

#51

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I'm going to ask each and every one of you just exactly who

#52

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I'm going to ask each and every one of you just exactly who

#53

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is the very finest physician in this city, to which you will respond,

#54

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is the very finest physician in this city, to which you will respond,

#55

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"You are!"

#56

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If you do not reply in a timely and exuberant fashion,

#57

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If you do not reply in a timely and exuberant fashion,

#58

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my associate will take his mop and, these are his words, not mine,

#59

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my associate will take his mop and, these are his words, not mine,

#60

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"Popsicle you."

#61

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Now my lovely ex-wife will demonstrate.

#62

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Now my lovely ex-wife will demonstrate.

#63

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Darling, just exactly who is the very best physician in our fair city?

#64

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Darling, just exactly who is the very best physician in our fair city?

#65

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You are. And now, as agreed,

#66

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you owe me a night on the town and some "me getting to finish" sex.

#67

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you owe me a night on the town and some "me getting to finish" sex.

#68

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Well done. Now, down the line we go!

#69

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Well done. Now, down the line we go!

#70

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- You are! - You are!

#71

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- You are! - You are!

#72

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God! Why?

#73

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Combined "you" and "are." "Yar." Made no sense.

#74

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Combined "you" and "are." "Yar." Made no sense.

#75

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It's true, Lonnie. Everybody heard it. Poke him again.

#76

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It's true, Lonnie. Everybody heard it. Poke him again.

#77

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Bob Kelso. Will you be joining us?

#78

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There was a line. I assumed it had something to do with cupcakes.

#79

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Bob, obviously you read the article.

#80

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Bob, obviously you read the article.

#81

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Last publication I read was the issue of Out

#82

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Last publication I read was the issue of Out

#83

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my son left by the crapper when home asking for money.

#84

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You'll never get my validation, hotshot.

#85

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You'll never get my validation, hotshot.

#86

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And just exactly where was the poke?

#87

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And just exactly where was the poke?

#88

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I froze. Gimme 20 bucks. I'll crack him over the head.

#89

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I froze. Gimme 20 bucks. I'll crack him over the head.

#90

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Only kill him if you have to.

#91

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That was amazing, baby. I've never felt so close to you.

#92

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Oh, me too.

#93

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Turk?

#94

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Were you not done cuddling?

#95

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I was thinking maybe we could go to J.D.'s half-acre.

#96

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I was thinking maybe we could go to J.D.'s half-acre.

#97

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Put a blanket down. You can lie in my lap while I stroke your hair.

#98

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Put a blanket down. You can lie in my lap while I stroke your hair.

#99

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Real reason, Turk.

#100

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J.D. Has a Slip 'n Slide, I wanna show off my new moves.

#101

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J.D. Has a Slip 'n Slide, I wanna show off my new moves.

#102

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I call this "The Captain."

#103

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I call this "The Captain."

#104

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Right. And then, wait, "The Dolphin."

#105

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Sometimes I think you and J.D. Are more of a couple than we are.

#106

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Sometimes I think you and J.D. Are more of a couple than we are.

#107

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Tell her I've known you longer.

#108

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(theme song)

#109

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(theme song)

#110

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I just don't usually burn this bad.

#111

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Don't worry. Later, I'm gonna find some aloe

#112

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Don't worry. Later, I'm gonna find some aloe

#113

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and rub it on wherever it hurts.

#114

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and rub it on wherever it hurts.

#115

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It's just on my back, really.

#116

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That was innuendo. You were gonna work on this.

#117

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Oh. Right, right, right. OK.

#118

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Oh. Right, right, right. OK.

#119

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It also hurts under my pants... in my pants.

#120

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It also hurts under my pants... in my pants.

#121

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Damn it! I can't get this!

#122

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You'll get it. You'll get it.

#123

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You'll get it. You'll get it.

#124

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What? Laverne, what?

#125

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What? Laverne, what?

#126

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No judgment here, child.

#127

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People were starting to talk about Elliot and Keith.

#128

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People were starting to talk about Elliot and Keith.

#129

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But I decided to stay above the fray. Then I changed my mind.

#130

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But I decided to stay above the fray. Then I changed my mind.

#131

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Can you believe those two?

#132

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No, I can't. All that carrying on in public.

#133

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No, I can't. All that carrying on in public.

#134

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- It's way too much. - It's just too much.

#135

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- It's way too much. - It's just too much.

#136

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I switched places so I could go again.

#137

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I switched places so I could go again.

#138

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- Dr Dorian? - Yes, Rex.

#139

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Mrs Levin won't take her medication.

#140

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Mrs Levin won't take her medication.

#141

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Mrs Levin has dementia, Rex.

#142

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And I know she loves sweets, so take the pill, put it in some raspberry jam,

#143

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And I know she loves sweets, so take the pill, put it in some raspberry jam,

#144

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put it on your finger, dip it in her mouth. Hello!

#145

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put it on your finger, dip it in her mouth. Hello!

#146

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Rex would remember that morning as the time he lost his finger tip.

#147

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Rex would remember that morning as the time he lost his finger tip.

#148

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With patients, it's luck.

#149

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You can't choose how tolerant they are.

#150

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Young man, can you make sure they don't give me any black blood?

#151

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Young man, can you make sure they don't give me any black blood?

#152

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I'll try.

#153

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I'll try.

#154

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Can't choose how classy they are.

#155

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Oh, your hernia stitches look great, Mr Borland.

#156

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Oh, your hernia stitches look great, Mr Borland.

#157

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Could you give them a kiss?

#158

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Could you give them a kiss?

#159

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Maybe later.

#160

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Bottom line, you can't choose your patients.

#161

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Bottom line, you can't choose your patients.

#162

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Hello.

#163

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It's about time. Are you my doctor?

#164

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It's about time. Are you my doctor?

#165

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Yes, I am. I'm gonna go ahead and give you a second

#166

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Yes, I am. I'm gonna go ahead and give you a second

#167

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so you can think about just how lucky that makes you.

#168

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Don't try to be funny.

#169

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Don't try to be funny.

#170

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Here's a list of things I'm going to need you to take care of.

#171

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Here's a list of things I'm going to need you to take care of.

#172

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That is so helpful. I'll take a look at this.

#173

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That is so helpful. I'll take a look at this.

#174

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- Hey. - When are you coming over tonight?

#175

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I can't. I'm on-call.

#176

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I'm really worried about a patient with metastatic adenocarcinoma.

#177

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I'm really worried about a patient with metastatic adenocarcinoma.

#178

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See? This is why I hate cancer.

#179

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See? This is why I hate cancer.

#180

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Listen up.

#181

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You are!

#182

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We're not doing that anymore.

#183

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We're not doing that anymore.

#184

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Now you're fairly strong at diagnosing, right?

#185

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Now you're fairly strong at diagnosing, right?

#186

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- Yes. - Terrific.

#187

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I need you to figure out what's wrong with that third-floor coffee machine.

#188

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I need you to figure out what's wrong with that third-floor coffee machine.

#189

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Gandharoo, I need you to talk to a young pregnant black girl

#190

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Gandharoo, I need you to talk to a young pregnant black girl

#191

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who will not let me call her mom.

#192

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Why would she listen to me?

#193

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Why would she listen to me?

#194

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I may have told her that you were Kanye West.

#195

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I may have told her that you were Kanye West.

#196

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I'm all right with that.

#197

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Let's go, group.

#198

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Let's go, group.

#199

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Look at our three manly men.

#200

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Look at our three manly men.

#201

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- Perry gets his chest waxed. - Keith loves to knit pillows.

#202

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- Perry gets his chest waxed. - Keith loves to knit pillows.

#203

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- Turk might be sterile. - We have a winner.

#204

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I can't get pregnant and I got a fertility test.

#205

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I can't get pregnant and I got a fertility test.

#206

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Why not ask him to get tested?

#207

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Turk is sensitive when it comes to his manliness.

#208

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Turk is sensitive when it comes to his manliness.

#209

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Remember when I told him his backpack looked like a purse?

#210

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Remember when I told him his backpack looked like a purse?

#211

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Turk, honey, I didn't mean it.

#212

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Turk, honey, I didn't mean it.

#213

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I am a man! And a man does not carry a purse!

#214

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I am a man! And a man does not carry a purse!

#215

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Yeah!

#216

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Yeah!

#217

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If you can't ask him, then what will you do?

#218

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That's easy. I'm gonna sperm-jack him.

#219

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That's easy. I'm gonna sperm-jack him.

#220

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Sure, sure.

#221

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I've made a little tweak to the schedule.

#222

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Lisa, you're on tonight and Keith is off

#223

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Lisa, you're on tonight and Keith is off

#224

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because he's got hospital-related business.

#225

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because he's got hospital-related business.

#226

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Don't give me that. You'd be off if you had a good reason.

#227

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Don't give me that. You'd be off if you had a good reason.

#228

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- If you and I were sleeping together? - The only woman in this hospital

#229

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- If you and I were sleeping together? - The only woman in this hospital

#230

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that I would even consider sleeping with is Jamie in Paediatrics.

#231

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that I would even consider sleeping with is Jamie in Paediatrics.

#232

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I know.

#233

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And secondly, I'm the attending, so tough tuchus.

#234

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And secondly, I'm the attending, so tough tuchus.

#235

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- Wow. - It's just so unfair!

#236

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- Wow. - It's just so unfair!

#237

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So unfair.

#238

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It really is very unfair, you guys.

#239

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It really is very unfair, you guys.

#240

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Hey, Gizmo, can you check on Mr Jensen for me?

#241

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Hey, Gizmo, can you check on Mr Jensen for me?

#242

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No problem, Brown Bear. Are you nude right now?

#243

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No problem, Brown Bear. Are you nude right now?

#244

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Yeah! How'd you know?

#245

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Your voice is always higher when you're nude.

#246

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Your voice is always higher when you're nude.

#247

⇓

That's true.

#248

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It's not weird you know that at all.

#249

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It's not weird you know that at all.

#250

⇓

Bob, just a note about the tapioca. I'm much more partial to flan.

#251

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Bob, just a note about the tapioca. I'm much more partial to flan.

#252

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You're a flan fan. It's fun to say, more fun to eat.

#253

⇓

You're a flan fan. It's fun to say, more fun to eat.

#254

⇓

Anyway, anything that you need, you just ask Dr Cox.

#255

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Perry, Bonnie here is an old friend.

#256

⇓

Perry, Bonnie here is an old friend.

#257

⇓

- Can't say I'm shocked. - Take care of her.

#258

⇓

- Can't say I'm shocked. - Take care of her.

#259

⇓

You can count on me, Bobbo!

#260

⇓

Here's the lowdown. In three hours, my shift ends.

#261

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Here's the lowdown. In three hours, my shift ends.

#262

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I will be leaving and meeting with my ex-wife

#263

⇓

I will be leaving and meeting with my ex-wife

#264

⇓

for a celebratory "best doctor in the city" date which is guaranteed to end

#265

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for a celebratory "best doctor in the city" date which is guaranteed to end

#266

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in crazy hotel sex.

#267

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I'm thinking six-inch heels, a leather mask, fishnet stockings.

#268

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I'm thinking six-inch heels, a leather mask, fishnet stockings.

#269

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Who knows? She may even get dressed up.

#270

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The good news for you, though, is that you have a case of hypercalcemia.

#271

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The good news for you, though, is that you have a case of hypercalcemia.

#272

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Any trained monkey can treat it. Let's see who that monkey's gonna be.

#273

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Any trained monkey can treat it. Let's see who that monkey's gonna be.

#274

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Any trained monkey can treat it. Let's see who that monkey's gonna be.

#275

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Banana.

#276

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Rex it is. Have a great night.

#277

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Rex it is. Have a great night.

#278

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You're in very capable nine-fingered hands.

#279

⇓

You're in very capable nine-fingered hands.

#280

⇓

I don't know what's gotten into you, baby, but I am turned on.

#281

⇓

I don't know what's gotten into you, baby, but I am turned on.

#282

⇓

I don't know what's gotten into you, baby, but I am turned on.

#283

⇓

OK, baby. This might feel a little bit weird,

#284

⇓

but I promise you, you will love it.

#285

⇓

but I promise you, you will love it.

#286

⇓

Honey? How could you think I wouldn't notice this on my dangle?

#287

⇓

Honey? How could you think I wouldn't notice this on my dangle?

#288

⇓

You were enjoying it until it started making that grinding noise.

#289

⇓

You were enjoying it until it started making that grinding noise.

#290

⇓

I know we're having a hard time getting pregnant,

#291

⇓

I know we're having a hard time getting pregnant,

#292

⇓

but, sweetness, it could be you.

#293

⇓

I already got tested.

#294

⇓

I already got tested.

#295

⇓

Oh.

#296

⇓

Oh.

#297

⇓

Turk.

#298

⇓

I'm a man!

#299

⇓

I'm a man!

#300

⇓

And men can make babies.

#301

⇓

I'm not afraid to tell you. It'll be a hell of a night.

#302

⇓

I'm not afraid to tell you. It'll be a hell of a night.

#303

⇓

I got us a penthouse.

#304

⇓

- How much did that run? - About five bucks.

#305

⇓

- How much did that run? - About five bucks.

#306

⇓

While I'm in the shower you can read it and get revved up.

#307

⇓

While I'm in the shower you can read it and get revved up.

#308

⇓

- Awesome. - Oh, now what the hell, Mongo?

#309

⇓

- Awesome. - Oh, now what the hell, Mongo?

#310

⇓

- Sorry, I'm his man now. - Hello.

#311

⇓

Don't get me wrong. I hit him hard. Twice.

#312

⇓

Don't get me wrong. I hit him hard. Twice.

#313

⇓

It just made him mad. Guy's got a skull like a mountain goat.

#314

⇓

It just made him mad. Guy's got a skull like a mountain goat.

#315

⇓

Perry, when I told you to treat Mrs Cooke, I meant it.

#316

⇓

Perry, when I told you to treat Mrs Cooke, I meant it.

#317

⇓

If I wanted to waste my breath, I'd have given my wife mouth-to-mouth

#318

⇓

when she went into cardiac arrest. She's OK.

#319

⇓

when she went into cardiac arrest. She's OK.

#320

⇓

My mistress used to be a lifeguard. Now get back in there.

#321

⇓

My mistress used to be a lifeguard. Now get back in there.

#322

⇓

Sorry. Looks like we're gonna have to take a rain check.

#323

⇓

Sorry. Looks like we're gonna have to take a rain check.

#324

⇓

No. You are.

#325

⇓

No. You are.

#326

⇓

- Enjoy your evening. - Thank you.

#327

⇓

No can do.

#328

⇓

No can do.

#329

⇓

- We're gonna get going. - No, no.

#330

⇓

There is no way that you get to spring your little boy-toy here

#331

⇓

There is no way that you get to spring your little boy-toy here

#332

⇓

for a night of passionless passion while my ass is here

#333

⇓

for a night of passionless passion while my ass is here

#334

⇓

and Jordan's in a hotel whispering sweet nothings to a shower nozzle.

#335

⇓

and Jordan's in a hotel whispering sweet nothings to a shower nozzle.

#336

⇓

I'm gonna hang out back here.

#337

⇓

I'm gonna hang out back here.

#338

⇓

I'll tell you what we're gonna do. We'll leave it up to your interns.

#339

⇓

I'll tell you what we're gonna do. We'll leave it up to your interns.

#340

⇓

Who here doesn't think that Barbie should abuse her power?

#341

⇓

Who here doesn't think that Barbie should abuse her power?

#342

⇓

There we go. Fair and square. Face-jock stays.

#343

⇓

It's a strange feeling when everyone's stuck in hell and you're not.

#344

⇓

It's a strange feeling when everyone's stuck in hell and you're not.

#345

⇓

- I might be sterile? - Oh, honey. Stay calm.

#346

⇓

- I might be sterile? - Oh, honey. Stay calm.

#347

⇓

- Nobody knows but us. - You firing blanks, buddy?

#348

⇓

- Nobody knows but us. - You firing blanks, buddy?

#349

⇓

I was just glad to watch TV and, for once, not be in a world of crap.

#350

⇓

I was just glad to watch TV and, for once, not be in a world of crap.

#351

⇓

- Why didn't you stand up for me? - Or not.

#352

⇓

- Why didn't you stand up for me? - Or not.

#353

⇓

Attendings switch schedules all the time.

#354

⇓

You switched last week and I defended you.

#355

⇓

Know what's going on? You don't like Keith.

#356

⇓

Know what's going on? You don't like Keith.

#357

⇓

Go ahead, tell me I'm wrong.

#358

⇓

Thanks, J.D. You're a great friend.

#359

⇓

At least you're not sterile.

#360

⇓

Amen to that, C Bear.

#361

⇓

Amen to that, C Bear.

#362

⇓

The next morning, I braced myself for Elliot's odd brand of revenge.

#363

⇓

The next morning, I braced myself for Elliot's odd brand of revenge.

#364

⇓

And there it was.

#365

⇓

And there it was.

#366

⇓

Did you individually drain all my eggs?

#367

⇓

Morning!

#368

⇓

Fine. I'll just have an apple.

#369

⇓

Looking for this?

#370

⇓

Looking for this?

#371

⇓

How did you do that?

#372

⇓

I'm having a rough morning, Brown Bear. How you doing with your sterility?

#373

⇓

I'm having a rough morning, Brown Bear. How you doing with your sterility?

#374

⇓

I can't talk about that right now. I'm in an elevator.

#375

⇓

Not reading you, Brown Bear. I repeat. Are you still sterile?

#376

⇓

Not reading you, Brown Bear. I repeat. Are you still sterile?

#377

⇓

This is so juicy, I feel dizzy.

#378

⇓

Stupid watchie-talkie.

#379

⇓

I heard they want to have children, but they can't 'cause he...

#380

⇓

I heard they want to have children, but they can't 'cause he...

#381

⇓

Don't worry, baby. I'll kick her ass for you later.

#382

⇓

Don't worry, baby. I'll kick her ass for you later.

#383

⇓

We can go to the clinic after work.

#384

⇓

I can handle this myself.

#385

⇓

I can handle this myself.

#386

⇓

When you went to get your test, you didn't take me.

#387

⇓

- Are you sure? - Yeah.

#388

⇓

- Are you sure? - Yeah.

#389

⇓

Yeah, besides, I've been giving the fellas some inspirational pep talks.

#390

⇓

Yeah, besides, I've been giving the fellas some inspirational pep talks.

#391

⇓

You got to want it, boys.

#392

⇓

You got to want it, boys.

#393

⇓

There is no "I" in sperm.

#394

⇓

Hey. You get the patient with gelastic seizures.

#395

⇓

Hey. You get the patient with gelastic seizures.

#396

⇓

Awesome. Every intern wanted this case.

#397

⇓

Awesome. Every intern wanted this case.

#398

⇓

You're asking for trouble. Everybody's already talking.

#399

⇓

You're asking for trouble. Everybody's already talking.

#400

⇓

He's the best. He shouldn't be punished because he has to sleep with me.

#401

⇓

He's the best. He shouldn't be punished because he has to sleep with me.

#402

⇓

- Has to? - Gets to... He gets to sleep with me.

#403

⇓

- Has to? - Gets to... He gets to sleep with me.

#404

⇓

As a woman, have you ever noticed how self-esteem issues just creep up on you?

#405

⇓

As a woman, have you ever noticed how self-esteem issues just creep up on you?

#406

⇓

I have sausage fingers.

#407

⇓

Remember when I pulled strings with the board

#408

⇓

Remember when I pulled strings with the board

#409

⇓

and got Perry that promotion? Yeah.

#410

⇓

and got Perry that promotion? Yeah.

#411

⇓

People started talking and Perry ended up emasculated.

#412

⇓

So it worked out great for me.

#413

⇓

I should not care what other people think. Right, Carla?

#414

⇓

I should not care what other people think. Right, Carla?

#415

⇓

Oh, sweetie, they're beautiful.

#416

⇓

Oh, sweetie, they're beautiful.

#417

⇓

They're kielbasas.

#418

⇓

They're kielbasas.

#419

⇓

Come in, Brown Bear. Come in, Brown Bear.

#420

⇓

Come in, Brown Bear. Come in, Brown Bear.

#421

⇓

If you're around, I'm having some java out front.

#422

⇓

If you're around, I'm having some java out front.

#423

⇓

I'm hit. I'm hit.

#424

⇓

I'm hit. I'm hit.

#425

⇓

Oh, this is gonna be fantastic.

#426

⇓

Oh, this is gonna be fantastic.

#427

⇓

All right, look. I know I said I wanted to go by myself to get tested today.

#428

⇓

All right, look. I know I said I wanted to go by myself to get tested today.

#429

⇓

But I've been doing some thinking and... I'm scared.

#430

⇓

But I've been doing some thinking and... I'm scared.

#431

⇓

So it would mean a lot if you went with me.

#432

⇓

So it would mean a lot if you went with me.

#433

⇓

Of course, buddy.

#434

⇓

Of course, buddy.

#435

⇓

You know I'm not comfortable getting busy with myself.

#436

⇓

You're in luck. This happens to be my specialty.

#437

⇓

You're in luck. This happens to be my specialty.

#438

⇓

Some tips. If you can't get over that you're doing it to yourself,

#439

⇓

Some tips. If you can't get over that you're doing it to yourself,

#440

⇓

sit on your arm until it falls asleep then pull it out and use that.

#441

⇓

sit on your arm until it falls asleep then pull it out and use that.

#442

⇓

I call it "The Stranger."

#443

⇓

I call it "The Stranger."

#444

⇓

If I ever have kids, you are never allowed to baby-sit.

#445

⇓

If I ever have kids, you are never allowed to baby-sit.

#446

⇓

I can't believe you're ready.

#447

⇓

We spend all day taking care of old people. Washing, cleaning them.

#448

⇓

We spend all day taking care of old people. Washing, cleaning them.

#449

⇓

Why bring that home?

#450

⇓

J.D., we're talking about kids, not going home to a house full of old folks.

#451

⇓

J.D., we're talking about kids, not going home to a house full of old folks.

#452

⇓

J.D., we're talking about kids, not going home to a house full of old folks.

#453

⇓

Fellas, two quick announcements.

#454

⇓

First of all, whoever's been filling my TiVo with JAG reruns,

#455

⇓

let's cut it out.

#456

⇓

let's cut it out.

#457

⇓

And secondly, Harvey, no matter how drunk you get, I like to sleep alone.

#458

⇓

And secondly, Harvey, no matter how drunk you get, I like to sleep alone.

#459

⇓

I like to snuggle.

#460

⇓

That's your problem, buddy. I got my own thing.

#461

⇓

That's your problem, buddy. I got my own thing.

#462

⇓

OK. Chris Turk?

#463

⇓

OK. Chris Turk?

#464

⇓

Yeah.

#465

⇓

We're ready for you.

#466

⇓

We're ready for you.

#467

⇓

Excuse me.

#468

⇓

Are any of the reading materials in there available for us out here?

#469

⇓

Are any of the reading materials in there available for us out here?

#470

⇓

Hey, J.D. This is that... black surgeon that you always hang out with.

#471

⇓

Hey, J.D. This is that... black surgeon that you always hang out with.

#472

⇓

Come on outside to the ramp, dawg.

#473

⇓

Come on outside to the ramp, dawg.

#474

⇓

Any second. Any second now.

#475

⇓

Any second. Any second now.

#476

⇓

Oh, for God's sake, breathe through your nose. You sound like my bulldog.

#477

⇓

Oh, for God's sake, breathe through your nose. You sound like my bulldog.

#478

⇓

You know, as a doctor, I rarely root for the disease,

#479

⇓

You know, as a doctor, I rarely root for the disease,

#480

⇓

but with you I find myself cheering,

#481

⇓

"Go hypercalcemia with underlying MEN syndrome! Go! Go! Go!"

#482

⇓

"Go hypercalcemia with underlying MEN syndrome! Go! Go! Go!"

#483

⇓

"Go hypercalcemia with underlying MEN syndrome! Go! Go! Go!"

#484

⇓

Do you drink out of the toilet? My bulldog drinks out of the toilet.

#485

⇓

Do you drink out of the toilet? My bulldog drinks out of the toilet.

#486

⇓

God Almighty.

#487

⇓

Dr Reid, we think it is lame that you give Keith preferential treatment.

#488

⇓

Dr Reid, we think it is lame that you give Keith preferential treatment.

#489

⇓

Dr Reid, we think it is lame that you give Keith preferential treatment.

#490

⇓

We're filing a complaint with Dr Kelso.

#491

⇓

OK. You know what? You guys can tell Kelso whatever you want.

#492

⇓

OK. You know what? You guys can tell Kelso whatever you want.

#493

⇓

He's gonna hear facts. I'm sleeping with Keith, his schedule's shifted

#494

⇓

He's gonna hear facts. I'm sleeping with Keith, his schedule's shifted

#495

⇓

and he gets the most interesting cases. Who wants 20 bucks?

#496

⇓

and he gets the most interesting cases. Who wants 20 bucks?

#497

⇓

That won't work. I don't have that much, so...

#498

⇓

I just got in here.

#499

⇓

What are you doing here?

#500

⇓

I was thinking about my fertility test

#501

⇓

I was thinking about my fertility test

#502

⇓

and how badly I wanted you to be there.

#503

⇓

Baby, I'm a man.

#504

⇓

We're not that vulnerable.

#505

⇓

We're not that vulnerable.

#506

⇓

I don't really know why I didn't tell you about it.

#507

⇓

I don't really know why I didn't tell you about it.

#508

⇓

I guess I was just scared that, if I got bad news, I'd be letting you down.

#509

⇓

I guess I was just scared that, if I got bad news, I'd be letting you down.

#510

⇓

I can see how you'd feel that way.

#511

⇓

I can see how you'd feel that way.

#512

⇓

Anyway, I thought I'd come over.

#513

⇓

Anyway, I thought I'd come over.

#514

⇓

Thanks, sweetie.

#515

⇓

But you might want to go outside 'cause I'm about to fill this up.

#516

⇓

But you might want to go outside 'cause I'm about to fill this up.

#517

⇓

Why would I wait outside?

#518

⇓

Why would I wait outside?

#519

⇓

- That's what's up. - That's what's up.

#520

⇓

You are more than welcome to have your goon take my thumbs

#521

⇓

and break them if you want to, Bob, but I am officially O-U-T out.

#522

⇓

and break them if you want to, Bob, but I am officially O-U-T out.

#523

⇓

and break them if you want to, Bob, but I am officially O-U-T out.

#524

⇓

I don't see how you could like that woman.

#525

⇓

I don't see how you could like that woman.

#526

⇓

I don't. She was married to my best friend, Richard.

#527

⇓

I don't. She was married to my best friend, Richard.

#528

⇓

He died a few years back. You know the deal with friends.

#529

⇓

He died a few years back. You know the deal with friends.

#530

⇓

If they love 'em, you have to, like it or not.

#531

⇓

If they love 'em, you have to, like it or not.

#532

⇓

Do you really believe that?

#533

⇓

Or are you just saying that to look good?

#534

⇓

Or are you just saying that to look good?

#535

⇓

Who am I kidding? You don't care what anybody thinks.

#536

⇓

Who am I kidding? You don't care what anybody thinks.

#537

⇓

I gotta tell you, though.

#538

⇓

You gave me some good advice about how to deal with Elliot.

#539

⇓

You gave me some good advice about how to deal with Elliot.

#540

⇓

- Can I fire him? - Sleep on it.

#541

⇓

- Can I fire him? - Sleep on it.

#542

⇓

Say, one more thing about devil-lady in there.

#543

⇓

Say, one more thing about devil-lady in there.

#544

⇓

Why me?

#545

⇓

I know it's a minor condition, Perry, but you know how things can turn.

#546

⇓

I know it's a minor condition, Perry, but you know how things can turn.

#547

⇓

I know it's a minor condition, Perry, but you know how things can turn.

#548

⇓

But you wanted me in there because I'm the best what, Bob?

#549

⇓

But you wanted me in there because I'm the best what, Bob?

#550

⇓

- No. - Say it,

#551

⇓

- No. - Say it,

#552

⇓

or I will go in there and tell her you're dying to be with her more often.

#553

⇓

or I will go in there and tell her you're dying to be with her more often.

#554

⇓

- Beg your pardon? - You're the best doctor.

#555

⇓

- Beg your pardon? - You're the best doctor.

#556

⇓

Thank you, Bob. That means a lot to me.

#557

⇓

Thank you, Bob. That means a lot to me.

#558

⇓

I know that everyone is very upset,

#559

⇓

I know that everyone is very upset,

#560

⇓

but I really don't think there's any need to bother Dr Kelso.

#561

⇓

but I really don't think there's any need to bother Dr Kelso.

#562

⇓

It's too late, Dr Reid.

#563

⇓

Right, it is too late, because from now on,

#564

⇓

Right, it is too late, because from now on,

#565

⇓

I'm gonna be handing out all case assignments.

#566

⇓

I'm gonna be handing out all case assignments.

#567

⇓

For instance, this cool case right here.

#568

⇓

For instance, this cool case right here.

#569

⇓

Give it to the most annoying intern?

#570

⇓

That'd be you, Lisa.

#571

⇓

That'd be you, Lisa.

#572

⇓

Maybe give it to the incompetent intern missing a finger.

#573

⇓

Maybe give it to the incompetent intern missing a finger.

#574

⇓

Because that would be you, Rex.

#575

⇓

Or maybe I should just give it to the best intern.

#576

⇓

Or maybe I should just give it to the best intern.

#577

⇓

Which would be you, Keith.

#578

⇓

Which would be you, Keith.

#579

⇓

Now if anyone wants to tell on me to whomever they like, they can.

#580

⇓

Now if anyone wants to tell on me to whomever they like, they can.

#581

⇓

Now if anyone wants to tell on me to whomever they like, they can.

#582

⇓

Good day.

#583

⇓

- Here you go. - Thanks again, Dr. D.

#584

⇓

- Here you go. - Thanks again, Dr. D.

#585

⇓

All right. If you like him, I like him.

#586

⇓

- Hey! I'm not sterile! - Congratulations!

#587

⇓

- Hey! I'm not sterile! - Congratulations!

#588

⇓

My friends were happy, and even though I felt like the fifth wheel,

#589

⇓

My friends were happy, and even though I felt like the fifth wheel,

#590

⇓

I could take solace in something.

#591

⇓

Turk, I forgot. I can't raid the freezer with you.

#592

⇓

Be careful in there. They lock it up at three.

#593

⇓

Be careful in there. They lock it up at three.

#594

⇓

I'm gonna kill him.

#595

⇓

I had finally won one.

#596

⇓

Edited by Access Innovation Media www.ai-media.tv

#597

⇓

Edited by Access Innovation Media www.ai-media.tv

#598

⇓