Giffer
Gallery
Login
Home
»
Scrubs
» S05E01 — My Intern's Eyes
Scrubs
Combine Images
Clear
❮
✕
❯
Season 5, Episode 1 — My Intern's Eyes
Since my apartment's roof collapsed, I was living at a hotel.
#1
⇓
Since my apartment's roof collapsed, I was living at a hotel.
#2
⇓
But that's not the only thing that's changed around here.
#3
⇓
(ROCK MUSIC)
#4
⇓
(ROCK MUSIC)
#5
⇓
Now that I'm an attending, I'm a licensed badass.
#6
⇓
Now that I'm an attending, I'm a licensed badass.
#7
⇓
Elliot actually works at a different hospital.
#8
⇓
Elliot actually works at a different hospital.
#9
⇓
She's trying to lay low at first.
#10
⇓
And Turk and Carla are trying to make a baby.
#11
⇓
Here you go, baby.
#12
⇓
Here you go, baby.
#13
⇓
I know you love foreplay, but I only have five minutes,
#14
⇓
I know you love foreplay, but I only have five minutes,
#15
⇓
so I made you a sandwich.
#16
⇓
That's the sexiest thing I've ever seen.
#17
⇓
That's the sexiest thing I've ever seen.
#18
⇓
- Over here, Turk. - My bad, baby.
#19
⇓
- Over here, Turk. - My bad, baby.
#20
⇓
Yep! Life was different.
#21
⇓
Hey! Did you take my Porsche from the valet?
#22
⇓
Hey! Did you take my Porsche from the valet?
#23
⇓
This didn't feel like my scooter.
#24
⇓
Ow!
#25
⇓
Look, no harm done. Here are your driving glasses,
#26
⇓
Look, no harm done. Here are your driving glasses,
#27
⇓
here's your driving scarf and here your driving gloves.
#28
⇓
here's your driving scarf and here your driving gloves.
#29
⇓
Fine, here's your driving sock.
#30
⇓
Fine, here's your driving sock.
#31
⇓
I didn't care, because now that I'm an attending,
#32
⇓
I'd picked out a whole new look.
#33
⇓
I'd picked out a whole new look.
#34
⇓
- Good morning, colleague.
#35
⇓
- Good morning, colleague.
#36
⇓
- Oh, absolutely not.
#37
⇓
What, Tall, Dark and Scary?
#38
⇓
What, Tall, Dark and Scary?
#39
⇓
I can wear whatever the hell I...
#40
⇓
- What are you doing?
#41
⇓
- This is my new imaginary warning light.
#42
⇓
- This is my new imaginary warning light.
#43
⇓
Whenever it starts blinking, a situation has ten seconds
#44
⇓
to resolve itself
#45
⇓
before I flash white with rage and kill someone.
#46
⇓
One, two, three, four...
#47
⇓
One, two, three, four...
#48
⇓
...seven, eight, nine and ten.
#49
⇓
I had a little trouble getting my Baby Gap T-shirt off.
#50
⇓
I had a little trouble getting my Baby Gap T-shirt off.
#51
⇓
It'll happen.
#52
⇓
Ow.
#53
⇓
Ow.
#54
⇓
Argh!
#55
⇓
OK, you know, I'm gonna... I'm gonna go with "ow."
#56
⇓
OK, you know, I'm gonna... I'm gonna go with "ow."
#57
⇓
How depressing is it being you?
#58
⇓
Seriously.
#59
⇓
Seriously.
#60
⇓
Would you equate it more to being a life long Cub fan,
#61
⇓
or to say, being born without lips?
#62
⇓
- Born without lips? - I know a guy.
#63
⇓
- His house just burned down. - How sad.
#64
⇓
- His house just burned down. - How sad.
#65
⇓
He was smoking in bed. He shouldn't smoke, 'cause he looks ridiculous.
#66
⇓
"I have a snake face."
#67
⇓
Listen, today if you bother me, could you do it without being around me?
#68
⇓
Listen, today if you bother me, could you do it without being around me?
#69
⇓
I have new interns starting. Can you imagine what it's like
#70
⇓
I have new interns starting. Can you imagine what it's like
#71
⇓
to see this place through their eyes for the first time?
#72
⇓
to see this place through their eyes for the first time?
#73
⇓
(INSPIRATIONAL MUSIC)
#74
⇓
(INSPIRATIONAL MUSIC)
#75
⇓
(INSPIRATIONAL MUSIC)
#76
⇓
Something on your shirt, kid. Huh. Oh.
#77
⇓
(laughs) Classic!
#78
⇓
(laughs) Classic!
#79
⇓
Hey...
#80
⇓
Sparky, it's five dollars a minute to stare in public.
#81
⇓
Sparky, it's five dollars a minute to stare in public.
#82
⇓
It's free in private... (PURRS)
#83
⇓
It's free in private... (PURRS)
#84
⇓
You're gonna love it here, sport.
#85
⇓
You're gonna love it here, sport.
#86
⇓
Get out while you still can.
#87
⇓
Seriously, get out while you still can.
#88
⇓
Seriously, get out while you still can.
#89
⇓
Junior, have you seen Johnny?
#90
⇓
Junior, have you seen Johnny?
#91
⇓
You know, Alzheimer's patient, likes to tackle people?
#92
⇓
Uh-uh.
#93
⇓
Uh-uh.
#94
⇓
Has anybody seen Johnny, the tackling Alzheimer's patient?
#95
⇓
Hey! You must be Keith.
#96
⇓
Hey! You must be Keith.
#97
⇓
Don't look so nervous, buddy. I got your back.
#98
⇓
Who am I?
#99
⇓
Who am I?
#100
⇓
I found him.
#101
⇓
I found him.
#102
⇓
(THEME SONG)
#103
⇓
(THEME SONG)
#104
⇓
Someone's close enough for a hair-mussing.
#105
⇓
Someone's close enough for a hair-mussing.
#106
⇓
Dynamite bangs. Hey, guys. Follow me.
#107
⇓
Dynamite bangs. Hey, guys. Follow me.
#108
⇓
Listen, if you're having trouble finding a vein for an IV,
#109
⇓
please don't page me.
#110
⇓
please don't page me.
#111
⇓
If you're desperate, we're lucky. This is a city hospital,
#112
⇓
there are plenty of heroin addicts around
#113
⇓
there are plenty of heroin addicts around
#114
⇓
who are quite adept at this.
#115
⇓
Did you find a vein, there, Reverend Mayhem?
#116
⇓
Did you find a vein, there, Reverend Mayhem?
#117
⇓
- No problem. - ok, Good work, buddy.
#118
⇓
- No problem. - ok, Good work, buddy.
#119
⇓
Stay in school.
#120
⇓
- Mr Kellerman, how're you feeling? - Not great.
#121
⇓
- Mr Kellerman, how're you feeling? - Not great.
#122
⇓
Well, that's probably why you're here!
#123
⇓
Humour is a great icebreaker for patients, OK? Follow me.
#124
⇓
Humour is a great icebreaker for patients, OK? Follow me.
#125
⇓
Mr Kellerman has congestive heart failure.
#126
⇓
Mr Kellerman has congestive heart failure.
#127
⇓
Ok, Lisa, I want you to start him on diuretics, OK?
#128
⇓
Ok, Lisa, I want you to start him on diuretics, OK?
#129
⇓
That way we'll loosen up some of fluid around his lungs.
#130
⇓
The good news is
#131
⇓
he'll go home tomorrow.
#132
⇓
he'll go home tomorrow.
#133
⇓
The bad news is if he's not here,
#134
⇓
he won't move up the heart transplant list.
#135
⇓
he won't move up the heart transplant list.
#136
⇓
See, in medicine, there are lots of Catch-22s,
#137
⇓
See, in medicine, there are lots of Catch-22s,
#138
⇓
a phrase made famous, I believe, by an old fisherman
#139
⇓
who would stay out fishing
#140
⇓
who would stay out fishing
#141
⇓
until he caught... how many fish? Anybody? That's right, 22.
#142
⇓
until he caught... how many fish? Anybody? That's right, 22.
#143
⇓
- See, in 1492, Columbus... - Newbie!
#144
⇓
If you loved the sound of your very own voice any more,
#145
⇓
If you loved the sound of your very own voice any more,
#146
⇓
you would probably just sit in a little room all day
#147
⇓
you would probably just sit in a little room all day
#148
⇓
and sing to yourself.
#149
⇓
Oh, you guys can skedaddle.
#150
⇓
Oh, you guys can skedaddle.
#151
⇓
(Makes stupid noise and laughs)
#152
⇓
I love interns. Gentlemen a reminder:
#153
⇓
I love interns. Gentlemen a reminder:
#154
⇓
As attendings, you are expected to turn in your insurance paperwork
#155
⇓
As attendings, you are expected to turn in your insurance paperwork
#156
⇓
and your required urine sample by tomorrow.
#157
⇓
Bob, I'm not planning on doing any paperwork.
#158
⇓
Bob, I'm not planning on doing any paperwork.
#159
⇓
But I did go ahead and leave my urine
#160
⇓
sample on your driver's-side car door.
#161
⇓
sample on your driver's-side car door.
#162
⇓
Perry, Your lips, my ass, they should meet.
#163
⇓
Dorian, after four years, I can only hope you no longer following
#164
⇓
Dorian, after four years, I can only hope you no longer following
#165
⇓
in his footsteps.
#166
⇓
I turned in my paperwork already, but I'm gonna wait till tomorrow
#167
⇓
I turned in my paperwork already, but I'm gonna wait till tomorrow
#168
⇓
to turn in my urine sample out of respect to the fellas in the lab.
#169
⇓
to turn in my urine sample out of respect to the fellas in the lab.
#170
⇓
There's an asparagus issue.
#171
⇓
There's an asparagus issue.
#172
⇓
Now there's an answer that warrants a half-sincere pat on the shoulder.
#173
⇓
Now there's an answer that warrants a half-sincere pat on the shoulder.
#174
⇓
Thanks, Dr Kelso!
#175
⇓
you know, he said "half-sincere," I think he was full-sincere.
#176
⇓
you know, he said "half-sincere," I think he was full-sincere.
#177
⇓
Feel my shoulder, it's still warm.
#178
⇓
Lindsey, by you reaching the level of attending physician,
#179
⇓
you've somehow managed to become a member of a club that I belong to.
#180
⇓
you've somehow managed to become a member of a club that I belong to.
#181
⇓
Obviously there was no vote. Because if there had been,
#182
⇓
Obviously there was no vote. Because if there had been,
#183
⇓
you would still hear the sound of my voice screaming, "Nay, nay,
#184
⇓
you would still hear the sound of my voice screaming, "Nay, nay,
#185
⇓
oh, dear God, one thousand times nay!"
#186
⇓
oh, dear God, one thousand times nay!"
#187
⇓
That being said, it's my obligation to let you in on the organisation's
#188
⇓
That being said, it's my obligation to let you in on the organisation's
#189
⇓
one and only bylaw:
#190
⇓
one and only bylaw:
#191
⇓
We're men.
#192
⇓
We're men.
#193
⇓
Yes, we are.
#194
⇓
The women are men. The children are men. The men, of course, men!
#195
⇓
The women are men. The children are men. The men, of course, men!
#196
⇓
So, I went ahead and took the liberty of making you five man cards.
#197
⇓
So, I went ahead and took the liberty of making you five man cards.
#198
⇓
Hold them very dear, because every time you drop the ball, man-wise,
#199
⇓
Hold them very dear, because every time you drop the ball, man-wise,
#200
⇓
I'm going to take one from you.
#201
⇓
I'm going to take one from you.
#202
⇓
I don't need your approval or your stupid man cards.
#203
⇓
I don't need your approval or your stupid man cards.
#204
⇓
Although the lettering is darling. Have you ever done calligraphy?
#205
⇓
Although the lettering is darling. Have you ever done calligraphy?
#206
⇓
- Thank you.
#207
⇓
- Damn it!
#208
⇓
That night, since we were low on cash, Turk snuck me into the movies.
#209
⇓
That night, since we were low on cash, Turk snuck me into the movies.
#210
⇓
One, please!
#211
⇓
One, please!
#212
⇓
Afterwards we talked about my living arrangements.
#213
⇓
- Are you sure about this? - You shouldn't stay in a hotel.
#214
⇓
- Are you sure about this? - You shouldn't stay in a hotel.
#215
⇓
So, why don't you just stay here until you find a place.
#216
⇓
Carla was pretty psyched to get rid of me. Are you gonna tell her?
#217
⇓
Carla was pretty psyched to get rid of me. Are you gonna tell her?
#218
⇓
I don't know. What do you think?
#219
⇓
Turk? Is that you?
#220
⇓
Turk? Is that you?
#221
⇓
- Yes. I'll be right in, baby.
#222
⇓
- Yes. I'll be right in, baby.
#223
⇓
- OK.
#224
⇓
Dude, you left your gym shorts in here!
#225
⇓
Look, I gotta sex her up. I'll be back as quick as I can,
#226
⇓
Look, I gotta sex her up. I'll be back as quick as I can,
#227
⇓
so, it'd be about a hour and a half.
#228
⇓
Wait, wait, wait! Could you just quickly scratch my nose?
#229
⇓
OK. OK. Don't zip me... up!
#230
⇓
OK. OK. Don't zip me... up!
#231
⇓
Turk! Turk!
#232
⇓
- I'm a little sick of the Turks. - Excuse me?
#233
⇓
- I'm a little sick of the Turks. - Excuse me?
#234
⇓
Not you, Omar. I love your people.
#235
⇓
I'm talking about their lovey-dovey crap.
#236
⇓
I'm talking about their lovey-dovey crap.
#237
⇓
Oh, Babe, I borrowed your backpack
#238
⇓
this morning and all my change fell out the bottom.
#239
⇓
this morning and all my change fell out the bottom.
#240
⇓
Maybe someone or something had to gnaw a hole in it
#241
⇓
to keep from suffocating.
#242
⇓
Maybe someone already apologised for that about a hundred times.
#243
⇓
Maybe someone already apologised for that about a hundred times.
#244
⇓
Well, maybe 100 wasn't enough, I don't know.
#245
⇓
- Absolutely no lovers' quarrels. - Damn it!
#246
⇓
- Absolutely no lovers' quarrels. - Damn it!
#247
⇓
Elliot, by the way, what are you doing here?
#248
⇓
Elliot, by the way, what are you doing here?
#249
⇓
Oh, she hasn't talked to anybody at her new hospital yet.
#250
⇓
- How did this become about me? - The Turks are sneaky.
#251
⇓
- How did this become about me? - The Turks are sneaky.
#252
⇓
Not you guys. I think Omar took my pudding.
#253
⇓
Hey, Keith! Can I get your pudding?
#254
⇓
Interns.
#255
⇓
Interns.
#256
⇓
Elliot, You should be excited about meeting people over there.
#257
⇓
You could totally reinvent yourself.
#258
⇓
You could totally reinvent yourself.
#259
⇓
You're right!
#260
⇓
I'm gonna tell them I am the most perfect doctor ever
#261
⇓
I'm gonna tell them I am the most perfect doctor ever
#262
⇓
who never needs anyone's help with anything!
#263
⇓
That'll end well. Dude!
#264
⇓
This guy's unbelievable!
#265
⇓
This guy's unbelievable!
#266
⇓
OK guys, for some reason, Mr Kellerman's fluid situation
#267
⇓
OK guys, for some reason, Mr Kellerman's fluid situation
#268
⇓
isn't getting any better. I think he should be more aggressive.
#269
⇓
isn't getting any better. I think he should be more aggressive.
#270
⇓
Keith?
#271
⇓
Why don't you go get a Lasix drip.
#272
⇓
Why don't you go get a Lasix drip.
#273
⇓
Other way, Keith!
#274
⇓
Ahh, Jason, when you're filling out a female patient's exam report,
#275
⇓
Ahh, Jason, when you're filling out a female patient's exam report,
#276
⇓
her breasts can be "healthy" or "unhealthy,"
#277
⇓
never "bangin' double-Ds."
#278
⇓
never "bangin' double-Ds."
#279
⇓
There's so much paperwork.
#280
⇓
There's so much paperwork.
#281
⇓
My dad was a veterinarian, and he never had to do any.
#282
⇓
Sometimes I wish this place were more like a horse hospital.
#283
⇓
Sometimes I wish this place were more like a horse hospital.
#284
⇓
I'm sorry, Mr Larson, but I do not like the look of that leg.
#285
⇓
I'm sorry, Mr Larson, but I do not like the look of that leg.
#286
⇓
We would have better hours.
#287
⇓
All right, gang, get out of here.
#288
⇓
All right, gang, get out of here.
#289
⇓
Hey, everybody? Great work today.
#290
⇓
Hey, everybody? Great work today.
#291
⇓
How do you bother someone without being around them?
#292
⇓
How do you bother someone without being around them?
#293
⇓
That is the question.
#294
⇓
(PHOTOCOPIER WHIRS)
#295
⇓
Dorian, I'm paying you to work, not stand around acting like the Fonz.
#296
⇓
Dorian, I'm paying you to work, not stand around acting like the Fonz.
#297
⇓
Perfect.
#298
⇓
Perfect.
#299
⇓
Being Turk's secret roommate was going great...
#300
⇓
Being Turk's secret roommate was going great...
#301
⇓
(KNOCK AT DOOR) ..until now.
#302
⇓
Turk? I'm leaving for work.
#303
⇓
Turk? I'm leaving for work.
#304
⇓
Ok, You've been working on your Turk impression since college.
#305
⇓
Time to shine!
#306
⇓
Time to shine!
#307
⇓
- Turk? - Baby, I'll be thinking about
#308
⇓
your lovelies and whatnot
#309
⇓
until the second I see you, but right now, I'm doing my business.
#310
⇓
until the second I see you, but right now, I'm doing my business.
#311
⇓
Don't forget to use the Glade!
#312
⇓
Don't forget to use the Glade!
#313
⇓
Dude! That's the best it's ever sounded!
#314
⇓
Dude! That's the best it's ever sounded!
#315
⇓
- I thought she was gone? - Nah, she came back for a quickie.
#316
⇓
All this baby stuff man, I feel like she rushed me into it.
#317
⇓
All this baby stuff man, I feel like she rushed me into it.
#318
⇓
Tell you the truth, I'm not even sure I'm ready.
#319
⇓
Tell you the truth, I'm not even sure I'm ready.
#320
⇓
Well, you better get ready, she's been off the pill for like a week.
#321
⇓
What have you done?
#322
⇓
Think she'll be mad?
#323
⇓
Dr Reid? Need some help?
#324
⇓
Dr Reid? Need some help?
#325
⇓
I don't need anyone's help. Thank you.
#326
⇓
Stop running!
#327
⇓
Stop running!
#328
⇓
Doctor, do you know where the Foley caths are?
#329
⇓
Doctor, do you know where the Foley caths are?
#330
⇓
Sir, I know where everything is.
#331
⇓
Be right back.
#332
⇓
Be right back.
#333
⇓
Stupid coffee robot!
#334
⇓
Stupid coffee robot!
#335
⇓
Frick!
#336
⇓
Don't sweat it kid. I used to hide here when I worked at this place.
#337
⇓
I'm on a fellowship now. Foley cath, please.
#338
⇓
I'm on a fellowship now. Foley cath, please.
#339
⇓
Thanks.
#340
⇓
Thanks. Could you also grab a number six needle?
#341
⇓
Thanks. Could you also grab a number six needle?
#342
⇓
Frick fricky frick frick!
#343
⇓
Nice ass, grandma!
#344
⇓
Nice ass, grandma!
#345
⇓
(screams)
#346
⇓
(screams)
#347
⇓
That screaming patient would have to wait. I had bigger problems.
#348
⇓
That screaming patient would have to wait. I had bigger problems.
#349
⇓
Hey, Keith! I just called upstairs to see how Mr Kellerman was doing.
#350
⇓
Hey, Keith! I just called upstairs to see how Mr Kellerman was doing.
#351
⇓
And get this: The nurse told me you never even started him
#352
⇓
And get this: The nurse told me you never even started him
#353
⇓
on a Lasix drip.
#354
⇓
And Lisa! Imagine my surprise when she told me you never even increased
#355
⇓
And Lisa! Imagine my surprise when she told me you never even increased
#356
⇓
his diuretic in the first place! I'm forced to ask,
#357
⇓
his diuretic in the first place! I'm forced to ask,
#358
⇓
are you people trained killers?
#359
⇓
Say something, Keith!
#360
⇓
Say something, Keith!
#361
⇓
I...
#362
⇓
Dr Dorian, if he gets bad enough do we have to put him on inotropes,
#363
⇓
Dr Dorian, if he gets bad enough do we have to put him on inotropes,
#364
⇓
he'll jump to the top of the transplant list and get a new heart.
#365
⇓
he'll jump to the top of the transplant list and get a new heart.
#366
⇓
They're messing up on purpose?
#367
⇓
They're messing up on purpose?
#368
⇓
Who told you guys to do this?
#369
⇓
There's a lot of ways to get caught.
#370
⇓
There's a lot of ways to get caught.
#371
⇓
Sometimes you get caught because
#372
⇓
you couldn't slip your wife her pill last night,
#373
⇓
you couldn't slip your wife her pill last night,
#374
⇓
so you had to feed her one of your special homemade brownies.
#375
⇓
so you had to feed her one of your special homemade brownies.
#376
⇓
- What's that? - Oh, that?
#377
⇓
That's a tiny marshmallow with writing on it.
#378
⇓
That's a tiny marshmallow with writing on it.
#379
⇓
Still, if you don't panic, you can get away with it.
#380
⇓
Just... doing some inventory... sir.
#381
⇓
Just... doing some inventory... sir.
#382
⇓
That's why I'm glad you work here, sweetheart.
#383
⇓
Come on, guys. Who put you up to this?
#384
⇓
As for me, I caught my culprit
#385
⇓
As for me, I caught my culprit
#386
⇓
because he made the classic mistake
#387
⇓
of returning to the scene of the crime.
#388
⇓
of returning to the scene of the crime.
#389
⇓
All because I, too,
#390
⇓
had been eating Turk's special homemade brownies.
#391
⇓
had been eating Turk's special homemade brownies.
#392
⇓
Angie, my buddy down in the lab just told me that your urinalysis
#393
⇓
Angie, my buddy down in the lab just told me that your urinalysis
#394
⇓
came back positive for the birth control pill.
#395
⇓
So, I will be taking one of... these.
#396
⇓
So, I will be taking one of... these.
#397
⇓
- Thank you! - Damn it!
#398
⇓
- Thank you! - Damn it!
#399
⇓
Keith, look at me.
#400
⇓
Keith, look at me.
#401
⇓
Did he specifically tell you to disregard my orders?
#402
⇓
Oh, what the hell.
#403
⇓
I was doing this and mouthing "I'll kill you,"
#404
⇓
I was doing this and mouthing "I'll kill you,"
#405
⇓
which I will if you don't get out of here. Go on, get.
#406
⇓
which I will if you don't get out of here. Go on, get.
#407
⇓
I saw it first.
#408
⇓
I saw it first.
#409
⇓
Long day.
#410
⇓
Long day.
#411
⇓
Newbie, I did tell them to ignore you and let Mr Kellerman get worse.
#412
⇓
And you wanna know something?
#413
⇓
And you wanna know something?
#414
⇓
I'd do it again.
#415
⇓
- Bye, Elliot. - Look...
#416
⇓
I know, I agreed to have a baby, but you were offering sex at the time.
#418
⇓
I would have agreed to anything!
#419
⇓
I would have agreed to anything!
#420
⇓
Carla, no.
#421
⇓
No! She knows I can't eat without my strawberry milk.
#422
⇓
No! She knows I can't eat without my strawberry milk.
#423
⇓
You should've let her fork me!
#424
⇓
You should've let her fork me!
#425
⇓
I think that's how you got into trouble
#426
⇓
in the first place! What's up!
#427
⇓
in the first place! What's up!
#428
⇓
Euphemism five!
#429
⇓
His vocabulary's gotten so much better!
#430
⇓
His vocabulary's gotten so much better!
#431
⇓
- Elliot Why are you here?
#432
⇓
- I have to make Kelso think I still work here
#433
⇓
- I have to make Kelso think I still work here
#434
⇓
so he doesn't have me arrested
#435
⇓
for stealing medical supplies.
#436
⇓
By the by, what would you have done if you couldn't give Carla the pill?
#437
⇓
By the by, what would you have done if you couldn't give Carla the pill?
#438
⇓
- I'd have faked it.
#439
⇓
- I'd have faked it.
#440
⇓
- Guys can't fake it.
#441
⇓
Really? Does this sound familiar?
#442
⇓
"Oh, oh baby, we're going all night. No, wait, don't move!
#443
⇓
"Oh, oh baby, we're going all night. No, wait, don't move!
#444
⇓
- "Sorry."
#445
⇓
- "Sorry."
#446
⇓
- Way too familiar.
#447
⇓
- Hey. - Thank you.
#448
⇓
Know what I've been doing?
#449
⇓
I mean, besides listening to my Alanis Morissette CD
#450
⇓
to get pumped up to talk to you? Here.
#451
⇓
to get pumped up to talk to you? Here.
#452
⇓
- Yep. - I've been thinking about
#453
⇓
how completely ridiculous it is that you would take Mr Kellerman's
#454
⇓
how completely ridiculous it is that you would take Mr Kellerman's
#455
⇓
life into your hands
#456
⇓
- without talking to him. - Well, I did talk to him.
#457
⇓
- without talking to him. - Well, I did talk to him.
#458
⇓
He did.
#459
⇓
Patients who stay low on the heart transplant list die waiting for one.
#460
⇓
Patients who stay low on the heart transplant list die waiting for one.
#461
⇓
This way, he moves up to the top of the list. Come on..
#462
⇓
- Then why didn't you tell me?
#463
⇓
- Because You're an attending now.
#464
⇓
And that doesn't just mean a fat bank account, expensive new toys
#465
⇓
And that doesn't just mean a fat bank account, expensive new toys
#466
⇓
and a fancy lawyer on retainer for when you kill a prostitute.
#467
⇓
and a fancy lawyer on retainer for when you kill a prostitute.
#468
⇓
From now on, the buck stops with you.
#469
⇓
And I know that you have occasionally bent the rules in this dump
#470
⇓
And I know that you have occasionally bent the rules in this dump
#471
⇓
over the last couple of years but, you only did it because you knew
#472
⇓
over the last couple of years but, you only did it because you knew
#473
⇓
when the crap started raining down,
#474
⇓
it was damn sure gonna fall on my head.
#475
⇓
it was damn sure gonna fall on my head.
#476
⇓
But now, the only way for you to stay out of the trouble storm
#477
⇓
is for you to go by the book. And I got news for you on that front:
#478
⇓
is for you to go by the book. And I got news for you on that front:
#479
⇓
By-the-book attendings kill us up here.
#480
⇓
By-the-book attendings kill us up here.
#481
⇓
Look here, I couldn't tell you about Kellerman 'cause I don't know
#482
⇓
Look here, I couldn't tell you about Kellerman 'cause I don't know
#483
⇓
what type of attending you're gonna be.
#484
⇓
Allow me to thank you for giving me the opportunity to prove myself.
#485
⇓
Allow me to thank you for giving me the opportunity to prove myself.
#486
⇓
You know what? This is my last one. Here, take it.
#487
⇓
You know what? This is my last one. Here, take it.
#488
⇓
Whatever happens to this poor guy is on you.
#489
⇓
Whatever happens to this poor guy is on you.
#490
⇓
The next morning was not good.
#491
⇓
Carla was not talking to Turk,
#492
⇓
Carla was not talking to Turk,
#493
⇓
Elliot had dropped by to help not talk to Turk
#494
⇓
and I was sneaking out in my undies
#495
⇓
and I was sneaking out in my undies
#496
⇓
because my clothes were downstairs in the dryer.
#497
⇓
because my clothes were downstairs in the dryer.
#498
⇓
- J. D? - Morning, friends!
#499
⇓
Who's ready for some java?
#500
⇓
- Are you wearing boxers? - Yes, I am, Carla,
#501
⇓
because I know when Turk's sad, he likes me to come over in my boxers,
#502
⇓
because I know when Turk's sad, he likes me to come over in my boxers,
#503
⇓
because he likes to call me his "honky Adonis."
#504
⇓
because he likes to call me his "honky Adonis."
#505
⇓
And that's what friends do.
#506
⇓
They bought it? Are we that gay?
#507
⇓
They bought it? Are we that gay?
#508
⇓
- What's that? - Oh, that's my new driving sock.
#509
⇓
- What's that? - Oh, that's my new driving sock.
#510
⇓
You can borrow.
#511
⇓
Actually, J.D.'s been living here secretly.
#512
⇓
- Turk, why? - Because I Gotta those damn
#513
⇓
- Turk, why? - Because I Gotta those damn
#514
⇓
judgmental eyes off me!
#515
⇓
J.D. Didn't want to live here, I begged him.
#516
⇓
J.D. Didn't want to live here, I begged him.
#517
⇓
- Is that true? - I didn't say that.
#518
⇓
- J.D. Can do my voice. - Hey, It's getting good!
#519
⇓
- J.D. Can do my voice. - Hey, It's getting good!
#520
⇓
Well, thank you! I lost it.
#521
⇓
Oh, you three are ridiculous.
#522
⇓
Oh, you three are ridiculous.
#523
⇓
Hey, I'm just here to grab a ride to work.
#524
⇓
At a hospital where you don't actually work! And you?
#525
⇓
At a hospital where you don't actually work! And you?
#526
⇓
How am I supposed to tell you I'm not be ready to have a baby
#527
⇓
How am I supposed to tell you I'm not be ready to have a baby
#528
⇓
when you're so excited?
#529
⇓
And you secretly moving back in here?
#530
⇓
And you secretly moving back in here?
#531
⇓
Now, I really don't love being den mother to you three...
#532
⇓
Now, I really don't love being den mother to you three...
#533
⇓
Fine, It's like crack to me.
#534
⇓
Still, let me ask you something. Why are you three so afraid of moving on?
#535
⇓
Still, let me ask you something. Why are you three so afraid of moving on?
#536
⇓
Dude, you're still eating those brownies!
#537
⇓
I don't wanna get pregnant! Shoot.
#538
⇓
I don't wanna get pregnant! Shoot.
#539
⇓
So, you're going to the university for a transplant!
#540
⇓
So, you're going to the university for a transplant!
#541
⇓
Well, come back and see us, OK?
#542
⇓
Well, come back and see us, OK?
#543
⇓
Who the hell is responsible for not treating that man?
#544
⇓
Well, Bobbo I was going to treat him, but I lost my stethoscope,
#545
⇓
Well, Bobbo I was going to treat him, but I lost my stethoscope,
#546
⇓
and that's...
#547
⇓
He's my patient, Bob!
#548
⇓
He's my patient, Bob!
#549
⇓
I'm responsible.
#550
⇓
Dr Dorian, I have kept my mouth shut
#551
⇓
about all the recent sexual harassment complaints
#552
⇓
about all the recent sexual harassment complaints
#553
⇓
because I don't think it's fair to punish a man for making small talk,
#554
⇓
because I don't think it's fair to punish a man for making small talk,
#555
⇓
or, say, asking his secretary just once to dress up as a geisha girl
#556
⇓
or, say, asking his secretary just once to dress up as a geisha girl
#557
⇓
- and call him Kelso-san... - What?
#558
⇓
Nothing. But now I need to know,
#559
⇓
Nothing. But now I need to know,
#560
⇓
is this the type of attending you're going to be?
#561
⇓
is this the type of attending you're going to be?
#562
⇓
- I guess so.
#563
⇓
- Anything else?
#564
⇓
- Anything else?
#565
⇓
I could tell him there's nothing in my cup and I'm pretending to drink
#566
⇓
to seem nonchalant... No.
#567
⇓
to seem nonchalant... No.
#568
⇓
... but I was thinking about what Carla said about moving on.
#569
⇓
... but I was thinking about what Carla said about moving on.
#570
⇓
And I wasn't the only one.
#571
⇓
Well, at least there's one attending around here I can count on.
#572
⇓
Well, at least there's one attending around here I can count on.
#573
⇓
Ahh, The hell with it, Bob. I don't work here! Have a good one.
#574
⇓
Ahh, The hell with it, Bob. I don't work here! Have a good one.
#575
⇓
- I hate this place.
#576
⇓
- It hates you, Bob.
#577
⇓
- It hates you, Bob.
#578
⇓
That's it. All my birth control pills are gone.
#579
⇓
That's it. All my birth control pills are gone.
#580
⇓
Not exactly.
#581
⇓
That Fig Newton you're about to eat
#582
⇓
is not only fat-free, but it's baby-free.
#583
⇓
is not only fat-free, but it's baby-free.
#584
⇓
I just don't get it, Turk.
#585
⇓
I just don't get it, Turk.
#586
⇓
Look, we had sex 20 times in eight days,
#587
⇓
and I bet it's because you sensed my hesitance.
#588
⇓
and I bet it's because you sensed my hesitance.
#589
⇓
- I just want a baby so badly.
#590
⇓
- Why?
#591
⇓
What's it gonna be like having a baby?
#592
⇓
Dr Cox says it's like having a dog that slowly learns how to talk.
#593
⇓
Dr Cox says it's like having a dog that slowly learns how to talk.
#594
⇓
Awesome!
#595
⇓
Right? And I come from a big family, and I love that.
#596
⇓
Right? And I come from a big family, and I love that.
#597
⇓
Me too!
#598
⇓
And every time we sit at the kitchen table, I feel like someone's missing.
#599
⇓
And every time we sit at the kitchen table, I feel like someone's missing.
#600
⇓
I can see him.
#601
⇓
- J.D! - Gotta make a quick twosie.
#602
⇓
- J.D! - Gotta make a quick twosie.
#603
⇓
This explains a lot.
#604
⇓
Hey! Meet your volleyball team.
#605
⇓
They're terrible.
#606
⇓
They're terrible.
#607
⇓
Newbie! I heard your voice.
#608
⇓
(MOUTHS WORDS)
#609
⇓
(MOUTHS WORDS)
#610
⇓
Thanks for nothin', ass-face.
#611
⇓
Thanks for nothin', ass-face.
#612
⇓
I'm gonna go ahead
#613
⇓
and give you back one of these man cards.
#614
⇓
and give you back one of these man cards.
#615
⇓
You deserve it.
#616
⇓
Wow. Wanna hug?
#617
⇓
You held on to it as long as you could.
#618
⇓
You held on to it as long as you could.
#619
⇓
I'm gonna have a good year, aren't I?
#620
⇓
Anything can happen.
#621
⇓
Anything can happen.
#622
⇓
And I knew he was right...
#623
⇓
Excuse me. (SCREAMS)
#624
⇓
Excuse me. (SCREAMS)
#625
⇓
... for all of us.
#626
⇓
... for all of us.
#627
⇓
Dr Reid, are you joining us for lunch today?
#628
⇓
Dr Reid, are you joining us for lunch today?
#629
⇓
Anyone want half a tofu-cheese sandwich?
#630
⇓
Anyone want half a tofu-cheese sandwich?
#631
⇓
Repeat after me:
#632
⇓
Repeat after me:
#633
⇓
Boy, boy, boy, very tall boy.
#634
⇓
Boy, boy, boy, very tall boy.
#635
⇓
- Boy, boy... - Boy, boy...
#636
⇓
...very tall boy. ...very tall boy.
#637
⇓
...very tall boy. ...very tall boy.
#638
⇓
Good night, Keith.
#639
⇓
Hey, keep your head up, you're doing a good job.
#640
⇓
Hey, keep your head up, you're doing a good job.
#641
⇓
Thanks for everything, Dr Dorian.
#642
⇓
Thanks for everything, Dr Dorian.
#643
⇓
Who am I?
#644
⇓
Captions edited by Ai-media ai-media.tv
#645
⇓
Captions edited by Ai-media ai-media.tv
#646
⇓
Combine Images
Clear Selection
Combined Images