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Home » It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia » S06E05 — Mac and Charlie: White Trash

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Season 6, Episode 5 — Mac and Charlie: White Trash

TMDB episode metadata

Show: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Episode title: Mac and Charlie: White Trash

Air date: October 14, 2010

Top billed cast: Charlie Day, Glenn Howerton, Rob Mac, Kaitlin Olson, Danny DeVito

Rejected from a pool club, Mac and Charlie set out fix an abandoned pool to help cope with the Philly heat wave. Meanwhile, Dennis and Dee go about dealing with the heat in a different way.

Source: TMDB

↓

Yo! Hey! Come on, bro,

↓

- help us out here! - Swim time, my man.

swim

↓

- It's a heat wave, dude! - Heat wave!

heat heat-wave wave

↓

- Heat wave! - Heat wave, my man.

heat heat-wave wave

↓

I'm sorry about that. Can I help you?

↓

- Yeah, two, checking in for the pool. - Check us in. Check us in.

check checking pool

↓

Uh, sorry, sir. You can't bring beer onto the premises.

beer bring premises

↓

What? You can't drink in this pool?

drink pool

↓

- No. - That's kind of weird.

weird

↓

Charlie, chug this.

charlie chug

↓

- Yeah, we'll pound 'em. - We'll just have to finish these out here.

finish pound

↓

Why don't you help us out?

↓

- The boss isn't around. - Oh, no. I'm good.

boss

↓

- All right. More for us. - You sure?

↓

I'm sure. Yeah.

↓

I'm gonna assume you guys aren't members here.

assume members

↓

You know what? Why don't you sign us up?

sign

↓

We'll blaze through these in no time.

blaze

↓

If you'd like to join our swim club,

club join swim swim-club

↓

you need to be sponsored by two existing members.

existing members sponsored

↓

But I'm sorry to tell you

↓

that membership is currently at capacity.

capacity currently membership

↓

- At capacity? - Yeah.

capacity

↓

We're in the middle of a terrible heat wave

heat heat-wave middle wave

↓

and you happen to be at capacity for us.

capacity happen

↓

Well, you can try the public pool.

pool public

↓

Oh, thank you.

↓

Thank you for your suggestion.

suggestion

↓

- We're out of here. Let's go. - Yeah.

↓

- you. - You don't have to… Oh, sir.

↓

I cannot believe that that just happened, in this day and age.

believe cannot cannot-believe happened

↓

I know. I can't believe there's such a big list.

believe list

↓

Mm-mm. Don't you get it, dude?

↓

They'll always be "at capacity" for us.

capacity

↓

I don't get that at all. Is that what he said?

↓

Don't you get it? We got big-timed. He called us lower class.

called class lower lower-class

↓

- He called us lower class? - Yeah.

called class lower lower-class

↓

But I wouldn't argue with that. We're definitely lower class.

argue class lower lower-class

↓

I'm not disputing that fact.

fact

↓

I'm saying we shouldn't get boxed out for it. It's bullshit.

boxed bullshit

↓

Honestly, I just wanna go swimming.

swimming

↓

Should we suck it up and go to the public pool?

pool public suck

↓

Ugh! Gross, dude. I will not go to that disgusting public pool.

disgusting gross pool public

↓

People there are gross.

gross

↓

I got a good idea. Let's get out of here.

idea

↓

There she is.

↓

This is what I'm talking about, bro.

↓

Man, the old diving pool.

diving pool

↓

Remember how much fun we used to have here?

fun remember used

↓

It's all deep end.

deep

↓

Hell, yeah, we had fun, dude.

fun

↓

Because this was a pool for people like us.

pool

↓

Street guys. And I think it's clear why it looks like shit now.

clear street

↓

'Cause Jamie Nelson drowned in it.

drowned jamie jamie-nelson nelson

↓

What? No.

↓

No, I was gonna say it was because of a pattern of discrimination,

pattern

↓

because this was a pool for lower-class people.

class lower lower-class pool

↓

- Dude, what? - Yeah. Look, dude,

↓

I say it's time we take matters into our own hands with this.

hands matters

↓

- What you thinking? - I'm saying we fix up this pool.

pool thinking

↓

Man, I'm gonna have to keep tinkering with the AC 'cause I can't feel it at all.

↓

Can you feel it?

↓

Charlie, you gotta focus? A pool is a major investment.

charlie focus investment major pool

↓

So if we're gonna get Frank on board with this,

board frank

↓

we have to approach him as equals.

approach equals

↓

Is that why you got that gold chain?

chain gold

↓

That's why I got the gold chain.

chain gold

↓

Okay. I see what you're going after here.

↓

- Hey, Frank! - Yeah.

frank

↓

We have a bit of a presentation for you.

presentation

↓

Can you come down?

↓

Oh, what's up? What's with the sheet?

sheet

↓

Not just yet, okay? Please, have a seat.

seat

↓

Charlie, get Frank a beer.

beer charlie frank

↓

Don't do airplane noises.

airplane noises

↓

- Just give him the beer. - Good move.

beer

↓

Why don't we get beers?

beers

↓

Because you're not even supposed to be here.

supposed

↓

Frank is the audience. So just keep your mouth shut.

audience frank mouth

↓

Sheet, sheet, sheet.

sheet

↓

Okay, ready. Hey, here we go!

ready

↓

Boom! Pool!

boom pool

↓

Charlie and I found this abandoned pool that we used to swim in when we were kids.

abandoned charlie found kids pool swim used

↓

It's, like, full of

full

↓

- all sort of branches and shit. - It's a big mess.

branches mess

↓

If we have a little bit of money, we can clean it up…

clean money

↓

- Pass. - No. Just let me finish.

finish pass

↓

- I have a whole thing… - Pass. It's too much work.

pass whole

↓

What else you got?

↓

Is this 'cause you guys are still all pissed off

pissed

↓

about not getting into that swim club?

club swim swim-club

↓

Look, if you guys were there, you would know how we feel.

↓

Oh, no. Stop right there. We would not know how it feels

feels

↓

'cause Dee and I would have waltzed right into that swim club.

club swim swim-club

↓

You don't lump Dennis and me in with you. We're high class, so…

class dennis lump

↓

You should've seen this guy. He would have lumped the shit out of you.

seen shouldve shouldve-seen

↓

Dennis, we live in the same apartment.

apartment dennis live

↓

Let me explain to you guys a little something about how class works.

class explain works

↓

You're born into class. It's about pedigree. It's about upbringing.

born class

↓

It has nothing to do with your present circumstances.

circumstances present

↓

No, see, Dennis and I were born upper class,

born class dennis upper

↓

and therefore we currently are and will forever remain upper class.

class currently forever remain therefore upper

↓

Frank, stop picking your teeth for one second and back us up on this.

frank picking second teeth

↓

Look, I quit on that shit. You understand?

quit

↓

I quit on it. I don't give a rat's ass about class.

class quit rats

↓

I live on the fringe. Fringe class is where I am.

class fringe live

↓

Okay, great. You're in the fringe class. I still maintain

class fringe maintain

↓

that Dee and I are in the upper class.

class upper

↓

All this talk has me thinking about taking a dip.

thinking

↓

- I'm hot as shit, Dee. - Oh, yeah.

↓

We could go pop a hydrant.

hydrant

↓

- Now we'd beat the heat that way. - I'm not popping shit.

beat heat popping

↓

That's about as low class as it gets. Dee?

class

↓

- Swim club. - Swim club.

club swim swim-club

↓

- Later, bitches. - Okay.

bitches

↓

Sorry, sir. We are at capacity.

capacity

↓

Capacity? That is unbelievable

capacity unbelievable

↓

that you would use the word "capacity" with us.

capacity word

↓

We truly could not admit you, even if you had the sponsors, which you don't.

admit sponsors truly

↓

Okay, well, we know you. You could sponsor us.

sponsor

↓

I don't know what kind of idea you have about us, but we are like you.

idea

↓

Send a little something sweet his way, maybe.

send sweet

↓

- Oh. A little sweetness? - Want a little something sweet?

sweet sweetness

↓

All right. If that's the only language

language

↓

- he understands… - In the mood for sweets?

mood sweets understands

↓

Sir, please, you're just embarrassing yourself now.

embarrassing

↓

Oh, I'm embarrassing?

embarrassing

↓

I'm embarrassing myself?

embarrassing

↓

Said the elitist pool guy.

pool

↓

You know what, Dee? I don't even think I'd want to be a part

part

↓

of some exclusionary pool club

club pool

↓

propagated by this man, this hatemonger.

↓

Oh, yeah, I'm with you.

↓

I bet you don't even have any Black people here.

black

↓

Excuse me, ma'am, but there is an African-American family right there.

african african-american american excuse family maam

↓

Oh, well, good for you!

↓

You keep a couple of token ones around, do you?

couple ones token

↓

- Parade 'em around like dancing monkeys? - Right. Oh, no.

dancing monkeys parade

↓

- That's not… I didn't mean it like that. - Monkeys?

monkeys

↓

- It's a… It's a phrase that means… - It's a phrase.

phrase

↓

- …performing on command. - Listen. Listen.

command performing

↓

You are more than happy to try the public pool.

happy pool public

↓

Oh, can we? Well, maybe we will.

↓

Yeah, because we have class.

class

↓

And having class means being able to mix with people that are beneath you.

able beneath class having

↓

- Mm-hmm. - Come on.

↓

Your shirt doesn't even fit.

shirt

↓

Wanna be an elitist, get yourself a tailor.

tailor

↓

Oh.

↓

- Oh! Oh! - No, Dee, that's…

↓

- …severely lacking in class. - Yeah. Too much? My bad. Got carried away.

carried class severely

↓

Oh, Jesus Christ. It's like a goddamn zoo!

christ goddamn jesus jesus-christ

↓

Uh, there's a very disturbing lack of adults here.

adults disturbing lack

↓

That girl just jumped in with her sneakers on.

girl jumped sneakers

↓

These people all have sneakers on.

sneakers

↓

All right. You know what's happening here?

↓

We're experiencing a bit of culture shock.

culture experiencing shock

↓

These people are very different from

↓

the people that are at our normal pool environment,

environment normal pool

↓

and this whole environment is very different.

environment whole

↓

And that's okay. That's okay. It's not a bad thing.

↓

- Dennis. Deandra. - Yeah.

deandra dennis

↓

What are you doing here?

↓

I tried to pop a hydrant, but there was no lookout, so I got shut down.

hydrant lookout tried

↓

I see that you have a towel. Where did you get that?

towel

↓

I don't see any attendants around here.

attendants

↓

Oh, I bartered fringe style with that guy over there.

fringe style

↓

I gave him a bite of my hot dog, he's letting me use his towel.

bite letting towel

↓

- Want a bite? - No.

bite

↓

- Yo, Mac! - Yeah.

↓

Hey, dude. I think this right here has got "keeper pile" written all over it.

keeper pile written

↓

We could set some of this up strategically

↓

to represent where all the cool shit in the pool's gonna be.

cool pools represent

↓

Like, you know, this rusty bike frame?

bike frame rusty

↓

We could say, "That's where the swim-up bar is."

swim

↓

- Swim-up bar. That's good, dude. - Yeah.

swim

↓

Man, I got a whole plan, like,

plan whole whole-plan

↓

we'll dip one of those cans with the string on it into the water,

cans string water

↓

and when we're underwater, we'll place our order.

order place underwater

↓

You know, "Two beers, please."

beers

↓

And when we swim up to the top,

swim

↓

Dennis hands them to us.

dennis hands

↓

Well, I was thinking we'd be at capacity for Dennis, but

capacity dennis thinking

↓

if he's serving us, that makes him lower than us,

lower makes serving

↓

- so that's cool. - He'll be lower than us.

cool lower

↓

- Don't worry about that. - I don't wanna put a tin can in the water

water worry

↓

though with a string 'cause we're not eight.

eight string

↓

I just thought it'd be cool. Put it in your ear. Put it in your mouth.

cool mouth

↓

Yeah, that's not cool, but…

cool

↓

- Well, it's classy. - Eh, neither.

classy

↓

All right. Well, you wanna pop down here

↓

- and help me chuck this mattress out? - Yeah.

chuck mattress

↓

It's the last big thing I got.

↓

Yeah, we'll get all of this out of here.

↓

Ooh! God, dude, it's really squishy.

squishy

↓

Yeah, it's covered in chlorine water, but, you know, it's clean.

chlorine clean covered water

↓

There hasn't been chlorine in here since Jamie Nelson.

chlorine jamie jamie-nelson nelson

↓

It's probably raw sewage that's been sitting here.

sewage sitting

↓

Yeah, it's got a sewage-y smell.

sewage smell

↓

- Yeah. All right. - Let's just chuck it out. Ready?

chuck ready

↓

- Yeah, let's get it out of here. - All right. Give it a boost.

boost

↓

- You ready? - One, two, three.

ready three

↓

Whoo!

whoo

↓

- I'm strong, dude. - I'm definitely getting stronger.

strong stronger

↓

- Whoo! - Wow, dude. This pool is sweet.

pool sweet whoo

↓

It's super deep.

deep super

↓

Yeah, I know. I know.

↓

Yeah. Hey, dude, um, how have you been getting in and out of here?

↓

I was climbing up the mattress, sort of like a ladder-type situation.

climbing ladder mattress situation type type-situation

↓

Aw, shit.

↓

Ho…

↓

Are we stuck in here?

stuck

↓

I think we're stuck.

stuck

↓

Help!

↓

- Help! - Help!

↓

- Come on! - Come on, man.

↓

I can't even make out an angle to do a lap or anything.

angle

↓

- Ow! Son of a bitch! - What? What?

bitch

↓

I just stepped on broken glass. Ow!

broken broken-glass glass stepped

↓

Oh, my God. There are shards of broken glass

broken broken-glass glass

↓

all over the bottom of the pool.

bottom pool

↓

Well, now I know why people are wearing shoes.

shoes wearing

↓

- Yeah. Now the shoes make a lot of sense. - Okay. Frank.

frank sense shoes

↓

What in the hell are you doing with that watermelon, man?

watermelon

↓

- You ever play this game? - No.

game

↓

You grease the watermelon up, you throw it in the pool.

grease pool throw watermelon

↓

Everybody goes crazy trying to grab it. They can't grab it.

crazy everybody grab

↓

Greased watermelon!

watermelon

↓

Here it comes! Try to grab it!

comes grab

↓

- Oh, no! - Come on.

↓

Come on.

↓

Ugh. I can't believe you borrowed hot dog guy's towel.

believe borrowed towel

↓

- Yeah, well, I'm not proud of it. - Gross.

gross proud

↓

- Listen, I have a proposition. - Yeah, I have a proposition, too.

proposition

↓

Let me walk in front of you so you don't get your blood all over my feet.

blood feet front walk

↓

Yeah, that's fair. Hey, why don't we call Mac and Charlie?

charlie fair

↓

I just feel like their pool has gotta be better than this.

pool

↓

No. We don't want them to know we didn't get into the private swim club.

club private swim swim-club

↓

- Oh, son of a bitch! - What?

bitch

↓

Which one of you little shits stole my shoes? God damn it!

shits shoes stole

↓

I'm putting out a feeler call.

putting

↓

Stride, stride, stride, stride, execute.

execute stride stride-stride stride-stride-stride

↓

Ah! Ah!

↓

Okay. I see what the problem is.

problem

↓

This move is intended for a back flip,

flip intended

↓

and what I need to do is a front flip.

flip front

↓

If you needed a back flip, I'd be up that wall in a second, bro.

flip needed second wall

↓

- No, you just wouldn't. - Yeah.

↓

You wouldn't because you don't know how to do a back flip.

flip

↓

Charlie, I do back flips

charlie flips

↓

- every single day of my life - No, you don't.

life single

↓

I have never seen you… Do a back flip right now, please.

flip seen

↓

Can I see one? Let's see one.

↓

Well, I need to stay focused

focused

↓

and conserve energy, and that's…

energy

↓

What if I need to do a back flip later?

flip

↓

You're not gonna need to! You need to do some kind of flip now!

flip

↓

And you don't know how 'cause you don't know how to flip or do karate!

flip karate

↓

All you know how to do is talk me into doing shit

↓

where I get stuck in a pool where I'm definitely gonna die!

pool stuck

↓

Oh, wait. My phone's ringing.

phones ringing

↓

Hang on. My phone's ringing.

hang phones ringing

↓

You've had a cell phone this entire time, dude? Are you kidding me?

cell cell-phone entire kidding phone

↓

Shh. Yello!

yello

↓

Hey, Charlie. Dennis and I were just…

charlie charlie-dennis dennis

↓

No, no. Leave my name out of it.

name

↓

It's Dee and Dennis. They'll rescue us.

dennis rescue

↓

No, dude. Do not tell them that we're stuck in here.

stuck

↓

Why?

↓

Because getting stuck in an abandoned pool is extremely low class.

abandoned class extremely pool stuck

↓

Dennis will sink his teeth into it.

dennis sink teeth

↓

I feel like if I talk to him, it's gonna slip out.

slip

↓

- Well, just don't let it slip out. - I kind of wanna tell him.

slip

↓

- Oh, my God. Just give me the phone. - We're stuck in a pool!

phone pool stuck

↓

It's Mac.

↓

How's it going over there in your

↓

deserted mine shaft or whatever?

shaft

↓

It's pretty sweet here. Okay?

sweet

↓

It's very private. Probably way more private than your piece-of-shit pool.

piece pool private

↓

Really? Well, I doubt that.

doubt

↓

Is that Mexican music?

mexican music

↓

Oh, the music.

music

↓

Uh, you know, that's… You know what it is.

↓

It's one of the attendants. He's walking around with a ghetto blaster,

attendants blaster ghetto walking

↓

serving us drinks and just making us comfortable, giving us hats.

comfortable drinks giving hats serving

↓

Why does it sound so echo-y over there?

echo sound

↓

Nothing but relaxation going on over here.

relaxation

↓

- It's very relaxe-y. - We're stuck in the pool!

pool stuck

↓

And, uh, that's probably what you're hearing is the relaxation.

hearing relaxation

↓

Hey! Hey! Those are my shoes!

shoes

↓

What?

↓

The attendant, you know, he just walked off with my shoes,

attendant shoes walked

↓

and it made me mad because he didn't ask.

↓

But,

↓

it's great because in the end I'm gonna end up with polished shoes.

polished shoes

↓

You know how it goes. Okay, bye.

↓

Damn it, dude.

↓

That private pool's awesome. They have attendants.

attendants awesome pools private

↓

Oh, my God. Who's in attendance? How many people?

attendance

↓

She didn't say anything. No, people that wait on them hand and foot.

foot hand

↓

- Oh, my God. Really? - Yes. Oh, my God.

↓

All right.

↓

Dude, since when do you have a cell phone?

cell cell-phone phone

↓

I buy 'em all the time.

↓

You prepay for it, and then you buy it and you throw it away.

throw

↓

There's a name for it.

name

↓

- A burner? - That's a burner.

burner

↓

- Dude, this is what drug dealers buy. - Oh, really?

dealers drug drug-dealers

↓

This is a very specific sect of lower class, okay?

class lower lower-class specific

↓

This is like felon class.

class felon

↓

- Felon class, huh? - God! All right, okay, so let me see.

class felon

↓

Who are we gonna call? We can't call the police, right, because…

police

↓

- No, we're trespassing. - Yeah.

↓

Oh, I got an idea! Let's order some food.

food idea order

↓

- Oh! Yeah. - Yeah.

↓

Then we'll have the delivery guy come and he can help us out.

delivery

↓

Perfect. And we can get some Chinese food,

chinese chinese-food food perfect

↓

'cause that's the classiest poolside food you can have.

food

↓

Yeah, we probably shouldn't get Chinese though,

chinese

↓

because those delivery guys are always Chinese

chinese delivery

↓

and he won't understand a word we're saying,

word

↓

and plus, he's probably gonna be too short.

plus short

↓

- Ooh. - Yeah.

↓

I could really go for some Chinese food though, man.

chinese chinese-food food

↓

- That'd be good. - But we're not actually eating the food.

eating food thatd

↓

- So… - I'm gonna eat the food, for sure.

food

↓

- I'm starving. - Okay, you know what, dude?

starving

↓

Let me handle it, all right? I'm gonna call…

handle

↓

I'm gonna call pizza delivery.

delivery pizza

↓

Pizza. We're gonna get some pizza.

pizza

↓

It'll be some big Italian lug, and he'll fish us out of here.

fish italian itll

↓

Fish sounds good.

fish sounds

↓

- See if they have fish there. - I'll ask.

fish

↓

This place is a shit-hole. I motion for Mac and Charlie's pool.

charlies hole motion place pool

↓

It just didn't sound like it was that bad over there.

sound

↓

There is absolutely no way I'm letting Mac and Charlie know

absolutely charlie letting

↓

that we didn't get into that swim club.

club swim swim-club

↓

Ow!

↓

- What? - Aw! What the hell?

↓

- What happened? - What was that?

happened

↓

- What? - That's a rock, Dennis.

dennis rock

↓

These kids are throwing rocks at each other for fun.

fun kids rocks throwing

↓

I mean, what kind of savages throw rocks at each other to have fun times?

fun rocks savages throw throw-rocks times

↓

You know what? I am done with this place. I'm done with it.

place

↓

We need to take another run at that swim club.

another club swim swim-club

↓

Yeah, well, we better before I lose it and I drown a child.

child drown lose

↓

Here you go.

↓

We ate the watermelon.

watermelon

↓

Butter me up. I'm gonna be the watermelon and jump in the pool.

butter jump pool watermelon

↓

- Do my back. I can't do my back. Go ahead. - Ugh!

ahead go-ahead

↓

Get ready for a rock in the eye.

ready rock

↓

- Oh! - Oh, no.

↓

Ow! That one really hurt.

hurt

↓

- Truce, truce. - That one really hurt.

hurt truce

↓

- No more throwing rocks. - Hello?

rocks throwing

↓

- Hello? Hello? - Ho-ho!

↓

- Hey! Hello! - Hey!

↓

Hey, you guys order a pizza?

order pizza

↓

You gotta be kidding me. He's Chinese.

chinese kidding

↓

I know, but his English sounds pretty good, and he's kinda big, too, right?

english kinda sounds

↓

Hey, we're stuck in this pool, dude. Can you help us out?

pool stuck

↓

- Is this a prank? - No, no.

prank

↓

Look, dude, dude, look.

↓

We'll pay you first, all right? And then help us out of here.

↓

- Charlie, you got some cash? - Uh, no. Shit.

cash charlie

↓

Well, check your front pockets. What are you doing?

check front pockets

↓

Well, no, I cut 'em off 'cause they were overshooting the bottom of my shorts.

bottom shorts

↓

- Forget it. I'm out of here. - No, no, wait!

forget

↓

- Hey, we'll give you a gold chain. - Ooh, ooh, yeah, yeah.

chain gold

↓

- Toss it up. - Okay.

toss

↓

- There you go. - Hey, toss that pizza down.

pizza toss

↓

I'm starving. Wanna get some of this pizza? Or…

pizza starving

↓

Yeah, we might as well. I haven't eaten.

eaten might

↓

Oh! Here it is.

↓

- No! Dude! - Sorry.

↓

- Hey, bro, why don't you just toss… - Uh-huh?

toss

↓

…down that hose, then you can pull us up.

hose pull

↓

See that hose right there?

hose

↓

- That'd be good, yeah, just pull us up. - Yeah, yeah.

pull thatd

↓

- Here you go. - That's it.

↓

- All right. - Here we go.

↓

Ah, that's perfect. That's perfect.

perfect

↓

Hey, this chain's fake as shit, man.

chains fake

↓

I'm sorry, dude. He's white trash.

trash white white-trash

↓

Don't take it personally.

personally

↓

- Forget it. I'm out of here. - No, no, wait, wait.

forget

↓

- Pull us up! - Don't go!

pull

↓

All right, whatever. No problem. No problem.

problem

↓

- You can just climb it, right? - I'm just going to climb right up.

climb

↓

- All right. Climb up. - Stand back,

climb stand

↓

'cause it takes a real man to do this.

real takes

↓

You ready, bro?

ready

↓

Oh! Whoa!

whoa

↓

Aw, man!

↓

Oh, dude.

↓

- All right, that's it. I'm calling Dennis. - No!

calling dennis

↓

Don't you understand? This pool is our bootstraps,

pool

↓

and it's lifting us up into the middle class.

class lifting middle

↓

Just accept the fact that you're white trash.

accept fact trash white white-trash

↓

Take a look at yourself. You can't do back flips.

flips

↓

You don't know karate. You're white trash!

karate trash white white-trash

↓

You're white trash, too, dude. Look at those shorts are white trash.

shorts trash white white-trash

↓

Do not call the shorts white trash.

shorts trash white white-trash

↓

Dennis told me about these shorts. They're not white trash.

dennis shorts trash white white-trash

↓

Look at this. Look at this. Look what I can do.

↓

What is white trash about that?

trash white white-trash

↓

Don't call me white trash!

trash white white-trash

↓

I feel like if I had that kind of mobility,

↓

I'd be capable of almost, well, pretty much anything.

capable

↓

Well, yeah, maybe then you could get the flip.

flip

↓

- Although I doubt it. - I could probably get that flip.

doubt flip

↓

- Can we just call Dennis? - Fine. Call Dennis.

dennis

↓

Yeah. Oh shit, dude.

↓

I put the phone in my front pocket.

front phone pocket

↓

God damn it.

↓

How, how is this gonna work? We look bad.

↓

We're getting in this pool if it's the last thing we do, okay?

pool

↓

We just need two sponsors, and we'll get in. Don't worry.

sponsors worry

↓

Really? You don't think we should go home and take a shower first?

home shower

↓

We don't have time to take a shower.

shower

↓

- Here we go. Here we go. - Oh.

↓

Hey, hey, hey!

↓

- Hi, hi, family, little ones. - Hey!

family ones

↓

Hi, Mom.

↓

Hey, listen. Sorry to jump out in front of you like that.

front jump

↓

But as you've noticed, there is a bit of a heat wave going on in Philly right now.

heat heat-wave noticed philly wave

↓

It's a terrific heat wave, and I'll tell you, it's affecting everybody.

affecting everybody heat heat-wave terrific wave

↓

It really is. And we were looking to cool down a little bit.

cool looking

↓

We thought, this pool, that'd be a great place for us to cool off.

cool place pool thatd

↓

And, you know, we just need a couple of sponsors.

couple sponsors

↓

A couple of sponsors. Dee, you're bleeding a little bit.

bleeding couple sponsors

↓

Is it bleeding? Is it happening?

bleeding

↓

Kids, don't touch the blood.

blood kids touch

↓

Hey, guys, I got kicked out of that other pool.

kicked pool

↓

This Filipino lady went crazy on me.

crazy filipino lady

↓

She started scratching me like a velociraptor.

scratching started

↓

It stings like…

stings

↓

Excuse me. What is happening here?

excuse

↓

These people are bleeding all over the place.

bleeding place

↓

- We're not bleeding all over the place. - All over the place?

bleeding place

↓

Mrs. Baines, I am sorry if they were harassing you.

harassing

↓

Please have a wonderful day.

↓

- We'll see you very soon. - Hey, kids.

kids

↓

Listen, buddy, you gotta let us in the pool. It's so hot.

buddy pool

↓

Try to understand.

↓

We are at capacity.

capacity

↓

We're not at capacity, 'cause I can see the pool from here…

capacity pool

↓

We are at capacity, sir!

capacity

↓

- I'm jumping in the pool! - Yeah.

jumping pool

↓

- I'm going to jump in the pool! - Plus, I'm gonna piss in it. Yeah.

jump piss plus pool

↓

I'm jumping in the pool!

jumping pool

↓

All right.

↓

You see, this is a proper memorial.

memorial proper

↓

I think Jamie Nelson would have liked this.

jamie jamie-nelson liked nelson

↓

I like the skateboard, 'cause Jamie loved skateboarding.

jamie loved skateboard

↓

- He did like skateboarding. - Not much of a swimmer.

↓

Not a very good swimmer.

↓

- No, he wasn't. - I think we can both agree

agree

↓

that we need to make sure that his spirit does not haunt us.

haunt spirit

↓

Yes. We definitely wanna ward off his spirit.

spirit ward

↓

- So if you know any… - Should we join hands?

hands join

↓

…voodoo, go ahead and…

ahead go-ahead voodoo

↓

Well, it's not called voodoo. This is the Lord, our Savior.

called lord savior voodoo

↓

- All right. Okay. - Okay, here we go.

↓

Lamb of God who takes away…

lamb takes

↓

What is that? There's a lamb?

lamb

↓

- Charlie, let me do my thing. - I'll just let you do your thing.

charlie

↓

- Let me do my thing. - All right.

↓

Lamb of God who taketh away the souls of the world.

lamb souls taketh world

↓

Don't take his soul and get his soul out.

soul

↓

You don't have to provide any kind of

provide

↓

let me do my thing.

↓

I just wanna be sure we get that spirit out of here.

spirit

↓

Lamb of God who takes away the sins of…

lamb sins takes

↓

Alligator tooth and snakeskin…

tooth

↓

- Don't undermine my prayer with voodoo. - Okay.

prayer undermine voodoo

↓

- Don't do it. - Prayer. I won't do it.

prayer

↓

Lamb of God who takes…

lamb takes

↓

Alligator tooth and snakeskin spirit,

spirit tooth

↓

take this spirit out of this pool.

pool spirit

↓

Okay, you know what? If you're not gonna take this seriously…

↓

I'm taking it perfectly seriously.

perfectly

↓

- Where the hell is… - Oh!

↓

- Nice. - This place is a shit-hole, huh?

hole place

↓

Yeah. I don't know why I thought it would look any different.

↓

- Honestly. Right here. - Get your spirit out of here!

spirit

↓

- Hey, guys. - Hey, hey, hey!

↓

What the hell are you doing down there?

↓

- Nothing. We're just hanging out. - No, no. We got stuck in…

hanging stuck

↓

- Dude, shut up. Shut up. - …in this pool, you know.

pool

↓

We're having a good time. No. We're good. We're good. We're good.

having

↓

We're good. We're just chillin'.

chillin

↓

This is pathetic. The word "trashy" just doesn't even do it justice.

justice pathetic word

↓

Whatever. What are you guys even doing here?

↓

Why don't you go back to your fancy pool. We're fine.

fancy pool

↓

Fancy pool got old after a while, you know.

fancy pool

↓

Wait a second. You guys didn't get into the pool, did you?

pool second

↓

- What? - What?

↓

Oh, my God. You sons of bitches.

bitches sons

↓

You didn't get in. Admit that you are low class, just like us.

admit class

↓

I'm not admitting shit because I did get into that pool.

admitting pool

↓

I just got tired of swimming in it.

swimming tired

↓

All right, then why are you here?

↓

- Why are you piping in, trash? - You're swimming in this…

piping swimming trash

↓

You shut your mouth, trash.

mouth trash

↓

Why are you calling me trash? I defended you earlier 'cause of these shorts.

calling defended shorts trash

↓

You're the ones that are trash.

ones trash

↓

Sitting in the bottom of a pool that's filled with trash, like trash.

bottom filled pool sitting trash

↓

You guys are white trash. You admit it right now.

admit trash white white-trash

↓

I hope you trash bags die at the bottom of this pool like Jamie Nelson did.

bags bottom hope jamie jamie-nelson nelson pool trash

↓

Don't bring Jamie Nelson into this!

bring jamie jamie-nelson nelson

↓

All right. Forget about it. Stop it.

forget

↓

Just stop it.

↓

I think I have a way for us to beat the heat tonight,

beat heat tonight

↓

Philly style.

philly style

↓

Yeah!

↓

- Oh, yes! - Hit us, baby!

baby

↓

Dee, get the cup.

↓

- Get the cup. - Oh, yeah.

↓

Oh, yes! All right!

↓

All right!

↓

Yeah!

↓

Watch your balls.

balls watch