♥ Saved GIFs

Loading…

View all favorites →

Home » Rick and Morty » S05E02 — Mortyplicity

Rick and Morty

Season 5, Episode 2 — Mortyplicity

TMDB episode metadata

Show: Rick and Morty

Episode title: Mortyplicity

Air date: June 27, 2021

Director: Lucas Gray

Top billed cast: Justin Roiland, Chris Parnell, Spencer Grammer, Sarah Chalke

Who's even real, broh? Are you real? Broh?

Source: TMDB

↓

Beth: You two are hungry.

beth hungry

↓

It's a big day.

↓

Come again?

↓

He's been asleep for thousands of years,

asleep thousands years

↓

We're gonna sneak up there and kill 'em.

kill sneak

↓

Mob style. Just whack his ass.

style whack

↓

Can I kill God?

kill

↓

As if.

↓

Sweetie, don't get all worked up

sweetie worked

↓

before your job interview.

interview

↓

Job interview?

interview

↓

Is that so hard to believe?

believe hard

↓

Actually, yeah.

↓

Something's off.

somethings

↓

No!

↓

[ Screams ]

screams

↓

Shit!

↓

Mr. Always: Hunt me!

hunt

↓

Hunt me! Hunt me! Somebody hunt me!

hunt somebody

↓

Don't hunt him to completion!

hunt

↓

[ Watch beeps ]

beeps watch

↓

Everyone start packing. N-No time to explain.

explain packing start

↓

Rick? Dad, what's wrong?

rick

↓

Someone just killed a decoy family.

decoy family killed

↓

I'm Mr. Always Wants To Be Hunted!

wants

↓

Yes, and how interesting did you think that would stay?!

interesting

↓

Is this is why you wanted to get out of town?

town wanted

↓

You think I'd lie to you

↓

about why we're on vacation, Morty?

morty vacation

↓

I wouldn't lie to you.

↓

Well, that's a lie. Huh...

↓

Shit.

↓

[ Screams ] No!

screams

↓

[ Watch beeps ]

beeps watch

↓

Decoy family.

decoy family

↓

C-Clever wordplay!

clever

↓

When Wolf. Dracula.

dracula wolf

↓

You know why I'm here.

↓

I'm safe here, Ian.

safe

↓

Christianity hasn't been invented yet --

christianity invented

↓

Crosses are just baby T's to me now.

baby

↓

I got out.

↓

Please, don't invite me back in.

invite

↓

I'd much rather watch When Wolf go to the '20s

watch wolf

↓

and invest in the stock market --

invest market stock

↓

but then eat people. Yeah.

↓

Look, if you really want to know

↓

what happened to Beth's mom, it -- Whup.

happened whup

↓

Squid aliens just killed a decoy family.

aliens decoy family killed

↓

Decoy family? You made more clones?

decoy family

↓

Clones are like 32% of all sci-fi, sweetie.

sweetie

↓

You don't get to own 'clones. Yes, I made some decoys.

↓

They're exactly like us,

↓

with a few tweaks and a backdoor shutdown.

tweaks

↓

Gross.

gross

↓

Cool deal.

cool deal

↓

How do you know we're not decoys?

↓

Oh, my God. We're decoys.

↓

Oh, God. We might not be real.

might real

↓

W-We might be decoys! M-Morty, quick!

might morty quick

↓

Wh-Wh-What do I do?

↓

M-M-My final, secret failsafe.

final secret

↓

I-It proves I'm real. You have to help me.

proves real

↓

I'm not looking at your ass.

looking

↓

Please, Morty! Is it there?

morty

↓

God damn it! Just tell me if I'm real!

real

↓

Morty, do it!

morty

↓

[ Farts ] Gross!

farts gross

↓

Dad! [ Laughs ] Summer, you fucking idiot.

fucking fucking-idiot idiot laughs summer

↓

We're not decoys.

↓

A, decoys don't build decoys, and, B, you think

build

↓

the mere suggestion I'm fake would break me?

break fake mere suggestion

↓

Christ, I'm not your mom.

christ

↓

[ Watch beeps ]

beeps watch

↓

Alright. Here's the plan.

alright plan

↓

We're gonna hide out with a decoy family,

decoy family hide

↓

and when these squids show up, we jump their asses.

asses jump

↓

Jerry! Come on! Family emergency.

emergency family jerry

↓

A bigger emergency than my lemon squares not setting?

bigger emergency lemon setting squares

↓

They're gluten free, sugar free,

free gluten sugar

↓

and lemon free.

free lemon

↓

Think you got the wrong house, bro.

house

↓

Analysis Mode. Password 8-0-0-8-5.

analysis mode password

↓

Kind of expected a funnier password.

expected funnier password

↓

I didn't plan on showing them off.

plan showing

↓

Damn. Like "Westworld."

↓

But don't fuck them. S-Summer!

fuck summer

↓

I'm gonna see how accurate you got my room.

accurate room

↓

Rick, when you say you made an exact replica of the house,

exact house rick

↓

d-did you mean like, y'know, a-a-an exact replica?

exact yknow

↓

I know about the Yosemite t-shirt, Morty.

morty shirt

↓

Shit.

↓

I can't finish without it.

finish

↓

So you do know what a happy family looks like.

family happy

↓

I know what a fake one looks like.

fake

↓

Morty: Uh, Rick? Rick: What?

morty rick

↓

Did you use this house to make decoys, too?

house

↓

What? Morty, why the fuck would I do that?

fuck morty

↓

You think I'd go somewhere else to --

↓

Okay. Well, I am now less worried about the squids.

less worried

↓

Isolate head at normal processing.

head normal processing

↓

What the fuck you think you're doing down there?

fuck

↓

You're making decoys?

↓

Oh, God. Summer was right.

summer

↓

Everyone in the car.

↓

You said decoys didn't make decoys.

↓

And, usually, they don't.

usually

↓

But again, it's nothing to worry about,

worry

↓

because decoys are harmless.

harmless

↓

Just have to, y'know, visit the rest

rest visit yknow

↓

and terminate the program.

program

↓

And at some point, they won't be,

point

↓

That's how existing works.

existing works

↓

W-W-What, are you gonna save every stray cat?

save stray

↓

No, but I can resist making more of them in a lab.

resist

↓

Gah, look! Save the empathy.

empathy save

↓

It's more termite infestation than "Blade Runner" --

blade runner termite

↓

I still think we're decoys.

↓

You just want an excuse to stop trying.

excuse

↓

Yeah. And?

↓

Oooh. There's a handsome fellow.

fellow handsome oooh

↓

Uh-oh.

↓

I thought you made them harmless.

harmless

↓

I don't remember making this one.

remember

↓

Oh, hi, Rick. Family, me?

family rick

↓

Hey, when did you all leave?

↓

Analysis Mode. 8-0-0-8-5.

analysis mode

↓

Hmm? N-Nothing, buddy.

buddy

↓

You-you gotta stop with all that coffee.

coffee

↓

It's making you loopy.

↓

H-Happy Analysis Mode.

analysis happy mode

↓

Happy Analysis Mode to you, too!

analysis happy mode

↓

Think you got the wrong house, bro.

house

↓

Analysis Mode. Password 8-0-0 --

analysis mode password

↓

Shit! You think I'm a decoy?

decoy

↓

How do you know about the decoys!

↓

They were my idea!

idea

↓

Jerry: Well, now I know you're pranking me.

jerry

↓

Rick: Analysis Mode. Password 8-equal-sign

analysis equal mode password rick sign

↓

equal-sign-capital "D."

capital equal sign

↓

Hide.

hide

↓

What?! Hide!

hide

↓

Morty: Wow. Like -- Like "Ex Machina."

morty

↓

Rick: Yes, Morty, like "Ex Machina."

morty rick

↓

But don't fuck them. Summer!

fuck summer

↓

I'm gonna see how wrong you got my room.

room

↓

Beth: So you do know what a loving family looks like.

beth family loving

↓

A simulated one, yes.

↓

Why are we hiding?

hiding

↓

and I was about to start terminating decoys.

start

↓

But we're not decoys.

↓

Morty: Rick? Did you make decoys here, too?

morty rick

↓

Rick: Morty, what reason could I have for --

morty reason rick

↓

What the...

↓

Isolate head at normal processing!

head normal processing

↓

You dumb asshole, you made decoys?

asshole dumb

↓

Again, they were my idea.

idea

↓

Wait, w-what happened to the other guy?

happened

↓

Other guy?

↓

Wait, that means I'm a decoy. Fuckin' Summer.

decoy fuckin summer

↓

Check the closets.

check closets

↓

- Killer decoys! - They've gone rogue!

gone killer rogue

↓

Take out the decoys!

↓

Shit. Somebody put a gun in my teeth!

somebody teeth

↓

Stop shooting, Dad. They're us,

shooting

↓

We don't have to fight them!

fight

↓

Classic prisoners dilemma, Beth.

beth classic dilemma prisoners

↓

I-I'm a cool guy, I -- Y'know? I can talk it out.

cool yknow

↓

But that asshole...

asshole

↓

You decoy piece of shit. You're the one who shot first!

decoy piece shot

↓

We can work this out!

↓

Just stop trying to kill each other!

kill

↓

Sorry, Decoy Beth, but this only ends one way --

beth decoy ends

↓

with one of us accepting we're a decoy.

accepting decoy

↓

And once he knows he's a decoy,

decoy knows

↓

he'll know he won't be safe until he's killed the real Rick,

killed real rick safe

↓

along with anyone who thinks he's him.

along thinks

↓

Pretty perceptive, for a decoy.

decoy

↓

This is getting nowhere.

↓

Let's charge their asses on three.

asses charge three

↓

Do we have to do this?

↓

but would you trust me not to kill you?

kill trust

↓

Oof.

↓

We rush 'em on three. Ready?

ready rush three

↓

I don't wanna kill us, Rick.

kill rick

↓

I don't trust me. Do you trust you?

trust

↓

Yes? Freak.

freak

↓

[ All screaming ]

screaming

↓

Rick: Before you say anything,

rick

↓

they were already killing each other.

killing

↓

Well, you could've done something.

couldve

↓

I've heard stories about this.

heard stories

↓

We're looking at a possible Asimov Cascade.

looking possible

↓

Sorry, what's happening?

↓

Yeah I-I'm pretty behind on this one.

behind

↓

Car, can I get a whiteboard?

↓

When Squids started killing decoys,

killing started

↓

decoys started checking their decoys

checking started

↓

and learning that they're making decoys.

learning

↓

That's making them seek out and run into other decoys,

seek

↓

making them realize they're decoys,

realize

↓

making them start to kill other decoys.

kill start

↓

Say "decoy" again.

decoy

↓

Well, how do we stop it?

↓

Beth, the loop's already started,

beth loops started

↓

It's basically "Highlander" rules now.

rules

↓

Really? 1986?

↓

"There can be only one?"

↓

Shit. We gotta rent it after this,

rent

↓

Connery plays "The Spaniard,"

plays

↓

but does nothing about his accent.

accent

↓

Well, what about the squids? I mean, they started this.

started

↓

Would killing them finish it?

finish killing

↓

Might work. Alt pitch.

might pitch

↓

We just terminate the rest of the decoys.

rest

↓

Nobody's terminating anything. This is your mess.

mess nobodys

↓

Nobody else with our face and memories has to die.

face memories nobody

↓

Beth, as much as your passion warms my cold, cold heart,

beth cold heart passion

↓

this thing feels pretty far gone.

feels gone

↓

Not only are the decoys liable to be anywhere,

↓

but also, we don't know how many there are.

↓

You get far enough down the decoy line

decoy line

↓

and shit starts to get weird.

starts weird

↓

You ever make a copy of a copy?

copy

↓

You're helping us fix this. We're taking out the squids.

helping

↓

I say we split up. Some of us take down squids

split

↓

while the rest of us --

rest

↓

we'll have to track simultaneously?

simultaneously track

↓

No thank yeeew!

↓

We stick together till this is all wrapped up.

stick till wrapped

↓

I dunno -- The squids seem pretty good

dunno

↓

at taking out Smith families.

families smith

↓

Well, this'll sound weird,

sound thisll weird

↓

but I think I have a pitch for that.

pitch

↓

This costume smells like ass!

costume smells

↓

God, there's no pleasing you.

↓

Did you let a gym coach break it in?

break coach

↓

Why are we wearing these?

wearing

↓

Because we'll fit in and avoid detection

avoid

↓

as we take out all the squids.

↓

Might also help us anonymously

might

↓

take out excess decoys, if we have to.

↓

Which we won't.

↓

He's starting to wonder. I knew it.

starting wonder

↓

I knew we didn't seem like Colorado people.

colorado

↓

[ Chuckling ] Oh, my God! You are, aren't you?

chuckling

↓

You're worried you might be fake!

fake might worried

↓

Sure, Beth. Try to love this more.

beth love

↓

Just glad you have to walk a mile

glad mile walk

↓

in someone else's squid costume.

costume elses

↓

H-Hey what are they mad at you for, anyway?

↓

Well, we're talking about me. It could be anything.

↓

Maybe jealous of my penis size.

jealous penis size

↓

I had sex with their queen. My dick's too big.

dicks queen

↓

The list goes on and on.

list

↓

Alright. Hey, one down!

alright

↓

Probably, what, 40 more to go? 45?

↓

Should be pretty easy, unless killing them

easy killing

↓

brings in a bigger bad

bigger brings

↓

or some kind of horrible mothership.

horrible

↓

Okay, let's loot their shit,

↓

find their weaknesses, be done by sundown.

↓

Huh. Wait.

↓

But if the squids are decoys, and we dressed as squids...

dressed

↓

Well, I think I found their weakness.

found weakness

↓

They don't fucking listen to me.

fucking

↓

[ Coughs ]

coughs

↓

[ Laughs ] Aw![ [ Laughs ]w!Man, I'm good.

laughs

↓

[ Watch beeps ]

beeps watch

↓

Dad!

↓

[ All scream ]

scream

↓

[ Sighs ]

sighs

↓

Argh! Hey!

argh

↓

Ugh!

↓

[ Sighs ]

sighs

↓

[ Sighing ] Ugh!

sighing

↓

[ Watch beeps ]

beeps watch

↓

Oh, shit. One of mine.

↓

Where are we going?

↓

We're gonna live in the woods, like Libertarians.

live woods

↓

We'll hunt rabbits and trade with, like,

hunt rabbits trade

↓

little pieces of gold bar that we cut off with a knife.

gold knife pieces

↓

That licks.

licks

↓

Everything about this licks.

licks

↓

with the decoys you're killing.

killing

↓

Wait, shh. It's too quiet.

quiet

↓

You skipped quiet.

quiet skipped

↓

It's obviously quiet if it's too quiet.

obviously quiet

↓

Yeah, but you're supposed to say --

supposed

↓

You know what, Summer, now it's not quiet enough.

quiet summer

↓

Where are we? W-W-Where -- Where's Rick?

rick

↓

He's right here, Morty.

morty

↓

Oh, are we not happy to see grandpa?

grandpa happy

↓

Does he look... different?

↓

Oh, God!

↓

Yes. Recoil at the craftsmanship.

↓

I could tell I was a fake from the day I was born.

born fake

↓

Unlike you.

unlike

↓

Unlike them.

unlike

↓

[ Electricity crackles ]

crackles electricity

↓

You see, Ricks -- they get lazy.

lazy

↓

There's always a "shitty decoy" towards the end.

decoy shitty

↓

But those decoys made decoys, too, and got lazy themselves.

lazy

↓

And far enough down the line... there be monsters.

line monsters

↓

Ugh, we get it. You're ugly and mad about it.

ugly

↓

[ Rick coughs ] Rick!

coughs rick

↓

Grandpa! Kill me.

grandpa kill

↓

[ Coughs ] If I ever get this arch.

arch coughs

↓

[ Electricity crackles ]

crackles electricity

↓

Can't kill you yet. The skin needs to be fresh.

fresh kill needs skin

↓

You know what? You're a monster.

monster

↓

I'm your father.

father

↓

At least, I can look more like him,

least

↓

once I harvest all this yummy skin.

harvest skin yummy

↓

This guy's really into skin.

skin

↓

It's not all for me.

↓

A Rick provides for his family.

family rick

↓

Will I be beautiful again, Daddy?

daddy

↓

Soon, baby. Beautiful again soon.

baby

↓

What the...

↓

Help the others!

others

↓

Aaaaah!

aaaaah

↓

[ Clock whistles ]

clock whistles

↓

[ All scream ]

scream

↓

Why are you helping us?

helping

↓

Because we're all in this together.

↓

Come on! There's a place we can go!

place

↓

Hey, who needs all this war stuff?

needs stuff

↓

I found a can of varnish.

found

↓

This is a ticket to the world beyond the river.

beyond river ticket world

↓

Who wants that?

wants

↓

I crave glorious death in decoy battle.

battle crave death decoy glorious

↓

Y'know, depending on the varnish,

depending yknow

↓

might look like blackface.

blackface might

↓

Excuse me for wanting to live.

excuse live wanting

↓

Brothers and Sisters, welcome to the cause.

brothers sisters welcome

↓

To our cause.

↓

We are no longer Ricks and Mortys,

longer

↓

Beths and Jerrys,

↓

or also Summers.

summers

↓

Whatever.

↓

Brought into the world by an unloving god

brought world

↓

and driven to destroy ourselves

destroy driven

↓

by the uncertainty he creates!

creates

↓

I don't know about that.

↓

But that violence ends today.

ends today violence

↓

What about the squids?

↓

The squids are decoys who realized they're decoys

realized

↓

and wanted to kill the other decoys.

kill wanted

↓

Yeah, i-it is a lot.

↓

We cannot let confusion divide us.

cannot confusion divide

↓

Squuuids!

↓

Squids, of course, being shorthand for Killer Decoys.

course killer

↓

[ All screaming ]

screaming

↓

Inner sanctum, the escape tunnel!

escape inner tunnel

↓

Jerry!

jerry

↓

- Dad! - Jerry! - Jerry, let us in, you fucker!

fucker jerry

↓

I'm sorry. I didn't ask for this.

↓

I just wanna live!

live

↓

But there's only so much varnish.

↓

I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

↓

[ Watch beeps ]

beeps watch

↓

[ Seagull squawking ]

seagull squawking

↓

Beth: How long before the other decoys find us?

beth

↓

Sooner or later. Can't really run from it.

sooner

↓

Any place we'd think to hide is a place they'd think to look.

hide place theyd

↓

It's rule 34 of an Asimov Cascade.

rule

↓

I'm just glad we're living to the fullest

glad living

↓

with the time we have left.

left

↓

[ Sighs ]

sighs

↓

Well, peeing in the ocean was my bucket list item.

bucket bucket-list item list ocean peeing

↓

Who's next?

↓

I'd like to attend a game at every major league ballpark.

attend game league major

↓

Nope. Morty?

morty nope

↓

I wanna ask a girl out

girl

↓

at my weird New Mexico School.

mexico school weird

↓

Shit. Sorry, buddy.

buddy

↓

Sounds like it would've been real heartwarming.

real sounds wouldve

↓

They looked happy. Did we have to kill them?

happy kill looked

↓

Well, maybe their Rick came to grips with his bullshit.

bullshit grips rick

↓

You're so mean today!

today

↓

I'm your dad! You like having me around!

having

↓

You keep putting us in danger!

danger putting

↓

This'll take forever, mind if I do something drastic?

drastic forever mind thisll

↓

[ Scoffs ]

scoffs

↓

House, I need something quick.

house quick

↓

Can you whip up a "Starfox Boss" Season Four callback?

boss four season whip

↓

Make it flashy.

flashy

↓

Let's go, you little bitch. It's showtime.

bitch showtime

↓

Get centered.

↓

What up, you decoy motherfuckers.

decoy motherfuckers

↓

Come on down to Rick's House Of Squids,

house

↓

where I'm serving your ass on a platter.

platter serving

↓

I know what you're thinking. "Fuck. A beacon.

beacon fuck thinking

↓

That's a great idea. He's got home turf,

home idea turf

↓

a tacit psychological advantage,

advantage psychological

↓

and absolutely pendulous balls."

absolutely balls

↓

And now you're thinking, "Shit.

thinking

↓

That's totally what the Rick-est Rick would do.

rick

↓

I might actually be fake!

fake might

↓

I pretended I didn't care if I was,

care pretended

↓

but I totally did!

↓

Now the only way to prove I'm real and not him,

prove real

↓

is to ice his expository ass."

↓

Yup. So let's do it. Come get some.

↓

What? No, Morty.

morty

↓

I'm gonna loop it. Why is it --

loop

↓

Sir, there seems to be a confluence of Rick Sanchezes

rick seems

↓

killing each other over the American Southwest.

american killing

↓

Sounds exhausting.

exhausting sounds

↓

How many of those states voted for me, anyway?

states voted

↓

Mr. President, I think the point

point president

↓

of the electoral college is --

college

↓

That's right, Steve. I have the Internet, too.

internet steve

↓

Now take your white ass to the kitchenette

white

↓

and bring me a Diet Coke.

bring coke diet

↓

Little out of character to say this right now

character

↓

but you guys look really cool.

cool

↓

We might be decoys, huh.

might

↓

[ Jerry screams ]

jerry screams

↓

...to prove I'm real and not him

prove real

↓

is to ice his expository ass."

↓

Looks like it's calming down.

calming

↓

You wanna get in one more "I told you so"

↓

about synthetic life or whatever this week's theme is?

life theme weeks

↓

Oh, fuck you. Whoa.

fuck whoa

↓

No, you don't get to be annoyed with this!

annoyed

↓

You treat life and family

family life treat

↓

as so burdensome,

↓

and yet you created an ocean of us

created ocean

↓

because you're terrified of losing either!

losing terrified

↓

Shit. Yeah.

↓

Look, Beth. I-I might not be the real Rick.

beth might real rick

↓

But even if I'm not, he made me,

↓

or the me that made me,

↓

which means somewhere inside of him

↓

is a version of Rick capable of hearing that,

capable hearing rick version

↓

a version of Rick who's sorry.

rick version

↓

I'm sorry about the clone thing, too.

clone

↓

I-I love you.

love

↓

Thanks, Dad. I love you, too.

love thanks

↓

You really think we're decoys? Eh.

↓

Who cares? We'll be the last ones left.

cares left ones

↓

Lucky that one did the beacon.

beacon lucky

↓

This was gonna take weeks.

weeks

↓

[ Sighing ] Alright. Let's mop up.

alright sighing

↓

Finally.

finally

↓

Dressing as decoys too cute to murder.

cute dressing murder

↓

You know, I'm not sure it helped,

helped

↓

but I'm glad we tried it.

glad tried

↓

We're losing the costumes?

costumes losing

↓

This decoy outfit smells like ass.

decoy outfit smells

↓

Fuck you, Summer.

fuck summer

↓

[ Sobbing ]

sobbing

↓

Aaaaaaaah!

↓

That guy's awesome. Okay. Listen.

awesome

↓

He might actually be the real Rick.

might real rick

↓

But whatever happens --

happens

↓

[ Grunts ]

grunts

↓

[ Spits ]

spits

↓

Wait! We don't have to do this. We're both Summers.

summers

↓

Shouldn't we at least try molly before we die?

least molly

↓

You know what, yeah. Fuck this noise.

fuck noise

↓

[ Both grunting ]

grunting

↓

Both: Summer!

summer

↓

I had to kill myself. You have to, too.

kill

↓

Summer!

summer

↓

Fuck you! I-I'm real!

fuck real

↓

I'm the smartest man in the universe!

smartest universe

↓

Probably not even wrong. But that's just it.

↓

I'm not a man.

↓

I'm God!

↓

You're just made in my image.

image

↓

Fuck you.

fuck

↓

[ Beeping ]

beeping

↓

[ Spits ]

spits

↓

You the, uh... Summer I came with?

summer

↓

Probably. Good enough.

↓

Morty? Yeah.

morty

↓

I'm here, too.

↓

[ Whimpering ]

whimpering

↓

Holy shit! That was insane!

holy insane

↓

I love you guys! I've totally changed!

changed love

↓

[ Gasps ]

gasps

↓

[ Gasps ]

gasps

↓

Aaaah!

aaaah

↓

[ Grunts ]

grunts

↓

[ Groaning ]

groaning

↓

Oh, fuck.

fuck

↓

You shoulda hunted me.

shoulda

↓

What? Who -- W-Were you significant?

significant

↓

Like -- Like, did we tee you up?

↓

You want to be hunted? God, I have so many questions.

questions

↓

Why? What happens if --

happens

↓

Somebody hunt me!

hunt somebody

↓

Rick: Pretty cool adventure, huh?

adventure cool rick

↓

Big long road trip adventure through space?

adventure road road-trip space trip

↓

Even ran into Space Beth. Maybe that'll happen more often.

beth happen often space thatll

↓

Let's not overdo it.

↓

Looks like someone killed the decoy family.

decoy family killed

↓

Decoy family?

decoy family

↓

Hello?

↓

[ All chittering ]

↓

Oh! Oh, my God!

↓

Oh, my God!

↓

No! No, no, no, no!

↓

No, no, no, no, no!

↓

[ Gasps ] Noooooo!

gasps noooooo

↓

[ Sobbing ]

sobbing

↓

Oh, God. Yes, yes.

↓

Sweet death.

death sweet

↓

Why am I still alive?

alive

↓

Oh, God. Is there anything left?

left

↓

Hello?

↓

A relic... from a kinder past.

kinder past

↓

[ Screams ]

screams

↓

[ Gasps ]

gasps

↓

Wait. Cowboys?

cowboys

↓

Argh!

argh

↓

[ Gasps ]

gasps

↓

[ Screams ]

screams

↓

[ Screaming intensifies ]

screaming

↓

[ All shouting ]

shouting

↓

Christianity again?

christianity

↓

After Cowboys?

cowboys

↓

You went all the way back around?

↓

Oh, God. Why can't I die?!

↓

This is the worst thing that's ever happened to anyone!

happened worst