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Home » Rick and Morty » S04E04 — Claw and Hoarder - Special Ricktim's Morty

Rick and Morty

Season 4, Episode 4 — Claw and Hoarder - Special Ricktim's Morty

TMDB episode metadata

Show: Rick and Morty

Episode title: Claw and Hoarder: Special Ricktim's Morty

Air date: December 08, 2019

Directors: Anthony Chun, Wes Archer

Top billed cast: Justin Roiland, Chris Parnell, Spencer Grammer, Sarah Chalke

Morty asks Rick for a dragon and Rick finds a wizard of another dimension who makes a soul bonding contract between Morty and a dragon called Balthromaw. Meanwhile, Jerry meets a talking cat in his bedroom

Source: TMDB

↓

Rick, we did it! We... We got it!

rick

↓

Hurry up, Morty. Get in!

hurry morty

↓

- Chachi! - Fuck Chachi, Morty.

fuck morty

↓

- Did you get it? - He helped me escape prison.

escape helped prison

↓

Did you get the Ultimate Cube?

cube ultimate

↓

Oh, it's purple.

purple

↓

Y-You said it was purple.

purple

↓

I said mine was.

↓

I didn't know they all were.

↓

And now we do, thanks to Chichi.

thanks

↓

Chasm.

↓

So, uh, w-w-when do I get it?

↓

Get what, a hug?

↓

Let's find a planet with a garden hose first.

garden hose planet

↓

- A dragon. - A dragon.

dragon

↓

You asked me to cut class and fight robots with you.

asked class fight robots

↓

I said, "No."

↓

You said, "Millions of lives depend on it."

depend lives millions

↓

I said, "I'll do it for a dragon."

dragon

↓

You said, "Whatever."

↓

I want my dragon.

dragon

↓

You know who's into dragons, Morty?

dragons morty

↓

Nerds that refuse to admit they're Christian.

admit christian nerds refuse

↓

- I want my dragon. - Let me give you rocket shoes.

dragon rocket shoes

↓

Let me give you Wolverine claws.

claws

↓

Let me give you a fucking rocket hat.

fucking rocket

↓

Just be sure to use it with the rocket shoes,

rocket shoes

↓

or it'll rip your head off.

head itll

↓

I want my dragon! I want my dragon!

dragon

↓

I want my dragon!

dragon

↓

Oh.

↓

Oh, crap.

↓

Crap.

↓

Dad, are you okay?

↓

Your ship crashed in Malta.

crashed ship

↓

I'm okay.

↓

Oh, thank God.

↓

Dad, did you promise Morty a dragon?

dragon morty promise

↓

Fuuuuuuu...

↓

Ugh!

↓

Bleed here and here.

bleed

↓

I'm not co-bleeding.

bleeding

↓

Under authority of our treaty

authority treaty

↓

'twixt the realms of dragon and man...

dragon

↓

Oh, my God, it's my first gay wedding.

wedding

↓

Summer!

summer

↓

I hereby bind this noble serpent and rider

hereby noble

↓

at the soul.

soul

↓

Here's your tome of dragon spells and lore.

dragon

↓

That'll have everything you need.

thatll

↓

Enjoy your dragon.

dragon enjoy

↓

Okay, dragon, here's the house rules.

dragon house house-rules rules

↓

My name is Balthromaw,

name

↓

breaker of sky, slayer of mountain.

breaker mountain

↓

Rule one... You are now scooper of your own poops,

poops rule

↓

or I will take you down like the black-light poster you are.

black light poster

↓

I don't got any more rules. That's it.

rules

↓

I'm guessing you'd rather not be tagged in this.

guessing tagged

↓

Okay, I'll bite.

bite

↓

What's with the talking cat?

↓

It's a dragon, dip knob.

dragon knob

↓

I know that's a dragon.

dragon

↓

I'm talking about the talking cat in my bedroom.

bedroom

↓

Jerry, why would I give Morty a talking dragon

dragon jerry morty

↓

and you a talking cat at the same time?

↓

Those concepts bump.

bump

↓

If you're talking to a cat, it's an abnormal event

event

↓

unrelated to me like when you went to Pluto

unrelated

↓

or fucked my daughter.

daughter fucked

↓

Okay, there's really no need to get savage.

savage

↓

So?

↓

Eh, he says he has nothing to do with your talking.

↓

- Told you. - So then why are you talking?

↓

- Why should that matter? - Why should it not matter?

matter

↓

How do I know I'm not hallucinating?

hallucinating

↓

Rick said this is an abnormal event.

event rick

↓

Do you always need Rick to tell you what's going on'?

rick

↓

Maybe it's time you stopped asking questions

asking asking-questions questions stopped

↓

and started having fun.

fun having started

↓

Oh.

↓

Wow, okay.

↓

So, what do you want?

↓

I want you to take us to the airport

airport

↓

and get us two first-class tickets to Florida.

class florida tickets

↓

Why, I... I can do that.

↓

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

whoa

↓

Oh, this is so cool!

cool

↓

I await your next command.

await command

↓

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Nobody is commanding anybody.

anybody nobody whoa

↓

I love soaring through the sky with you as equals.

equals love soaring

↓

W-What do you want to do?

↓

I want to enter my lair and sleep upon my hoard

enter lair sleep

↓

until the Age of Man expires.

↓

9K8'!-

↓

Split the diff?

split

↓

20-minute nap and soar through the sky?

minute soar

↓

Ugh.

↓

As you command.

command

↓

Okay, see you soon.

↓

T-This is fun.

fun

↓

BALTHROMAWI Yeah, right.

↓

What's this show called, "Ass"?

called

↓

Yeah, it's like "Bones," but they solve ass crimes.

bones crimes solve

↓

This ass is a clue.

clue

↓

Are these two gonna hook up?

hook

↓

No, and only the lame fans want that.

fans lame

↓

Don't tell me how to enjoy things.

enjoy

↓

- Go to her ass. - That's Brenner.

↓

Go to Brenner Ass.

↓

Honeymoon over already?

honeymoon

↓

What's that supposed to mean?

supposed

↓

Admit it, Morty. Dragons suck.

admit dragons morty suck

↓

Why don't you admit you don't anyone else to be happy

admit happy

↓

because you're a sad old fart?

fart

↓

How do you saddle a fart?

fart saddle

↓

Holy shit. Look!

holy

↓

I love you, Ass.

love

↓

I love you, Brenner.

love

↓

- No. - Shh.

↓

- Ah! - Oh!

↓

And that's the end of the "Morty Gets a Dragon" episode.

dragon episode morty

↓

Are you gonna slay it?

slay

↓

First off, I always slay it, queen.

queen slay

↓

- Secondly, yes. - Should I pause "Ass"?

pause secondly

↓

Nah, it's kind of boring now that they're together.

boring

↓

Hey, fuckface.

fuckface

↓

Will you shut the fuck up or at least roll over?

fuck least roll

↓

Oh, no, it burns.

burns

↓

Oh, my God. Oh, the fire of... of it all.

fire

↓

Ah, if only I had prepared better

prepared

↓

for this terrifying battle by remembering

battle remembering terrifying

↓

the only thing dragons are known for.

dragons known

↓

II.

↓

Careful you don't get heartburn.

careful heartburn

↓

I made that android with a lot of C4.

↓

Oh, I'm sorry. I imbued it with

↓

a remote-controlled explode-y potion.

controlled explode potion remote

↓

You have bested me.

↓

I am at your service.

service

↓

Good to be on the same parchment.

↓

Now, I'm gonna tell my grandson you ran off

grandson

↓

with a low-flying 747 while you pack up your...

flying pack

↓

Wait, is this... Why do you have an original.

original

↓

Ecto Cooler juice box from 1989?

cooler juice

↓

I hoard that which your kind covets.

↓

- Give you 20 bucks for it. - Nice try.

bucks

↓

What the hell else are you hoarding down here?

↓

Cha-ching. "Small Soldiers" Spin Pops?

ching pops soldiers spin

↓

- Don't open that. - I'm not an idiot.

idiot open

↓

Hey, why do you have Future's self-titled album on vinyl?

album futures self

↓

Look closer.

closer

↓

Oh, shit. He signed it.

signed

↓

Closer.

closer

↓

He signed it in molly and Percocet?

molly signed

↓

I could spend all night down here.

night spend

↓

Do you indulge in volcanic fumes?

fumes indulge

↓

Is it gonna fuck up my brain?

brain fuck

↓

- No. - I'll do it anyway.

↓

Hoo, those were not cheap tickets,

cheap tickets

↓

but, um, I'm down to clown.

clown

↓

Uh, w-w-w-why can you talk again, uh?

↓

It's not important, Jerry.

jerry

↓

Okay, but why Florida?

florida

↓

Because they don't ask questions.

questions

↓

They play volleyball, they party, and they have fun.

fun party volleyball

↓

Right, right.

↓

You can do this, Jerry.

jerry

↓

I can do this. I can do this.

↓

Ugh!

↓

Oh, yeah.

↓

Hey, Jerry, after this game,

game jerry

↓

come to my yacht and bring your cat.

bring yacht

↓

You got it, Jipe.

↓

I got to admit, you were right.

admit

↓

I've got to tell you something, Jerry.

jerry

↓

This is the happiest I've ever been in my entire life.

entire entire-life happiest life

↓

Oh, gross! Who shit in the sand?

gross sand

↓

Someone took a small shit in the sand

sand

↓

and buried it with, like, two little kicks

buried kicks

↓

and just left it here like a land mine.

land left

↓

Why and who?

↓

It was him.

↓

Help!

↓

I'm being summoned by Morty.

morty

↓

Yeah. He's, uh, texting me.

texting

↓

Hmm. How are you responding?

responding

↓

Ugh, I tend not to,

tend

↓

or maybe I'll send, like, a popular animated GIF

animated popular send

↓

that could be interpreted in almost any way.

↓

Brilliant.

brilliant

↓

I summon thee.

summon thee

↓

I summon thee, Balthromaw.

summon thee

↓

What the hell?

↓

Taylor Swift pumping her hands in the air?

hands pumping swift taylor

↓

- What does it mean when... - It means you're lame.

lame

↓

What's the saying?

↓

"Orcs work to live. Dwarves live to work."

live

↓

So dumb.

dumb

↓

If there's ever a saying about me,

↓

I'll fly into the fucking Sun.

fucking

↓

Oh, you're small for a dragon, Rick.

dragon rick

↓

Well, I sleep on an extra big pile of awesome shit.

awesome extra pile sleep

↓

Then there will be sayings about you.

↓

Your lessers will hunt you down,

hunt

↓

and you will be owned or slain.

owned

↓

That's why they call it a dying breed, brother.

breed brother dying

↓

U9h! Ugh!

↓

Oh, God, ugh.

↓

- My soul. - Oh!

soul

↓

Oh, yeah. I'm...

↓

I'm... I'm a dragon.

dragon

↓

Oh! Ugh, I'm bonding.

bonding

↓

I'm bonding too.

bonding

↓

- Oh! - Yeah.

↓

What the fuck?

fuck

↓

Morty, I can explain.

explain morty

↓

Stop!

↓

Why are you still doing it?

↓

Why does it feel better now?

↓

I hope it's not because you're watching but don't go anywhere.

hope watching

↓

How did you find us?

↓

We followed the smell of sulfur and skankery.

followed smell

↓

- Oh! - Oh, yeah.

↓

- Oh, man, ugh. - Fuck this.

fuck

↓

You can take this stupid fake soul-bond contract,

bond contract fake soul stupid

↓

and you can... Mm! Ah!

↓

No refunds.

↓

Your dragon soul-bonded with my grandpa.

bonded dragon grandpa soul

↓

Oh, my! I am so sorry.

↓

That is a total violation.

total violation

↓

Yeah, no shit.

↓

I'll take care of this at once.

care

↓

You slut dragon!

dragon slut

↓

- What the fuck? - You slut.

fuck slut

↓

- Chill out, dude. - Slut!

chill slut

↓

- Okay, that's... - You slut!

slut

↓

- Y-You don't have to... - Slut!

slut

↓

Shame on you!

shame

↓

Shame, you slut! You slutty, slutty slut!

shame slut slutty

↓

Ow! Why the fuck does it feel like you're whipping me?

fuck

↓

Because your soul got tangled

soul tangled

↓

- in a dirty... - Ah!

dirty

↓

- Slutty... - Ow!

slutty

↓

- Slut soul! - Ow!

slut soul

↓

- Let's go! - Ow! Ow!

↓

Get to that portal, you slut.

portal slut

↓

Grandpa, do something, or I will tweet,

grandpa tweet

↓

and you will be canceled.

canceled

↓

Hey, Dandruff the Great, lighten up and give the kid his dragon.

dragon lighten

↓

By whose command?

command

↓

You have no magic.

magic

↓

Yeah, I know. I have actual power.

actual power

↓

Not here, you don't.

↓

True power looks like this...

power

↓

Stone monster.

monster stone

↓

- Stick that up your ass. - Oh, you're done?

stick

↓

I thought the rock monster was here to introduce a physicist.

introduce monster rock

↓

Spinal cord, uh, activate morphine.

activate cord morphine spinal spinal-cord

↓

Oh, I might be fucked.

fucked might

↓

Lightning bridge!

bridge lightning

↓

Okay, he's gone. Listen up.

gone

↓

There's probably animals in these hills.

animals hills

↓

If you spare me, I can make your crotch a salt lick.

crotch lick salt spare

↓

Agana aksaka sapooloo.

↓

Thank you, Morty.

morty

↓

Figures you'd be higher status in Lame World.

figures higher lame status world

↓

Get your shit together, Lair Wrecker.

lair

↓

We need to rescue Balthromaw.

rescue

↓

Morty, the moral of this story is bros before dragons.

bros dragons moral morty story

↓

You know what I'm talking about?

↓

Yeah, if he dies while you're soul bonded, you die too.

bonded dies soul

↓

Morty, the moral of this story is bros rescue dragons.

bros dragons moral morty rescue story

↓

Balthromaw, by soul bonding

bonding soul

↓

with multiple riders,

multiple riders

↓

you have violated the treaty between dragon and mankind.

dragon mankind treaty violated

↓

The Dragonarchy sentences you to hang by the neck until dead.

dead hang neck sentences

↓

On the count of three.

count three

↓

One Dragonarchy,

↓

two Dragonarchy,

↓

2 1/2... I just wanted to make sure...

wanted

↓

Three!

three

↓

Grandpa Rick, what's wrong?

grandpa rick

↓

Oh, God. The wizard must have hung Balthromaw!

hung must wizard

↓

Well, fuck it. Can we go back then?

fuck

↓

W-Well, no, no. It takes, like, 78 years

takes years

↓

to hang a dragon to death, so...

death dragon hang

↓

Aw, man. It's so annoying.

annoying

↓

You ever, like, try to swallow a really big vitamin

swallow vitamin

↓

with no water? Ugh!

water

↓

You know, like.

↓

Really, like, big one, you know,

↓

and it kind of gets, ugh, stuck in your throat?

stuck throat

↓

It's... It's annoying. All right.

annoying

↓

Morty, go ahead and activate this golem.

activate ahead go-ahead morty

↓

Agana aksaka sapooloo.

↓

Fucking dumb. All right.

dumb fucking

↓

Who wants to be infused with, like, uh, unreasonable power?

power unreasonable wants

↓

Oh, can I be, like, a sexy arrow-shooty lady?

arrow lady sexy

↓

Yeah, whatever. There's no rules. I don't care.

care rules

↓

Morty, you want superpowers?

morty superpowers

↓

No, thanks. I'm fine. I've got my book.

book thanks

↓

All right. Good luck with that.

luck

↓

Let's go.

↓

God, it's like...

↓

Have you ever had too much orange juice,

juice orange orange-juice

↓

or, like, you know how egg yolk

↓

kind of, like, gets in your throat?

throat

↓

Yeah, we get it.

↓

Come on and hurry.

hurry

↓

W-We got to free Balthromaw.

free

↓

- Upsulu... - I got this.

↓

Morty, how's that book working out for you,

book morty working

↓

you fucking d-d-dumb-ass?

dumb fucking

↓

Huh. You know what? You're right.

↓

I could get used to this magic stuff.

magic stuff used

↓

There's Balthromaw.

↓

Check this shit out. Watch this.

check watch

↓

Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't even look.

↓

Don't even bother looking.

bother looking

↓

Just fucking let magic guide your arrow.

arrow fucking guide magic

↓

Summer, what the hell are you doing?

summer

↓

- Take this seriously. - Shut the fuck up, Morty.

fuck morty

↓

Stop trying to pretend like magic involves skill or thought.

involves magic pretend skill

↓

Summer, make it look like it's coming out of your butthole.

butthole coming summer

↓

Yeah, yeah.

↓

Ah!

↓

Oh, fuck, my fucking eye, oh!

fuck fucking

↓

What in the Medieval equivalent of tarnation...

medieval

↓

Jesus Christ!

christ jesus jesus-christ

↓

Summer, you fucking idiot!

fucking fucking-idiot idiot summer

↓

Power of 12 feet.

feet power

↓

Uh, ow, fuck!

fuck

↓

I take it all back!

↓

I fucking hate magic!

fucking fucking-hate hate magic

↓

Ah!

↓

Slut thief!

slut thief

↓

You're a slut thief!

slut thief

↓

Pretty fun boat, fun people.

boat fun

↓

That's great, not being asked why I can talk.

asked

↓

I'm a talking cat, but "Who cares why?" is my point.

cares point

↓

Well, nice talking to you for no reason.

reason

↓

Jorge, that was a good one,

↓

but do you know what a peanut butter gargoyle is?

butter peanut peanut-butter

↓

Nah, what's that?

↓

Dude, it's when you take the chick,

chick

↓

- put her feet on a cathedral... - Sorry to interrupt, guys.

cathedral feet interrupt

↓

Just want to clarify, are these real sex positions?

clarify positions real

↓

Because if they are,

↓

how are they gratifying to the male at all?

male

↓

And if the goal is to make something up,

goal

↓

why not make up something... funnier?

funnier

↓

I'm asking too many questions, aren't I?

asking questions

↓

How ironic.

ironic

↓

Get out of Florida, you overthinking cat.

florida

↓

Why don't you go overthink shit up north in Georgia?

georgia north overthink

↓

Hate that cat.

hate

↓

You got any money for a cab'?

money

↓

Why ask questions?

questions

↓

Why not just have fun?

fun

↓

I deserve that.

deserve

↓

Attention, citizens of Draygon,

attention citizens

↓

a slut dragon has escaped.

dragon escaped slut

↓

Anyone caught harboring it is also a slut.

caught slut

↓

- That's how it goes. - Ow, my eye.

↓

It pains me that you can feel my pain.

pain pains

↓

Yeah, how about you suck your dick,

dick suck

↓

which is also somehow my dick?

dick

↓

Aw, why can't couples that start out cheating ever end up happy?

cheating couples happy start

↓

M-Maybe I can find that Wizard's portal spell

portal spell

↓

in here and g-get us home.

home

↓

How about finding the spell that unbinds me

finding spell

↓

from your fucking dragon?

dragon fucking

↓

No spells can do that.

↓

Only the wizard can unbind soul bonds.

bonds soul wizard

↓

Uh, who the fuck are you?

fuck

↓

Who are we? Who the fuck are you, bitch?

bitch fuck

↓

Debrah, stop. We are the slut dragons.

dragons slut

↓

We live in these slut caves where we fuck,

fuck live slut

↓

suck, and eat butt, and we kindly ask that you leave.

butt kindly suck

↓

If the wizard knows we are here, he will imprison us.

knows wizard

↓

Yeah! We like it down here

↓

'cause we can fuck woolly mammoths. Get out!

fuck

↓

Get the fuck out of here, Michael!

fuck michael

↓

Shut up, Michael!

michael

↓

You're the only one that fucks that thing.

fucks

↓

Get the fuck out of here.

fuck

↓

Well, at least I'm not into shit play.

least

↓

- Fuck you! - Hey, wait!

fuck

↓

Everybody stop, stop!

everybody

↓

Listen, this is all my fault.

fault

↓

I started all this when I tried to control Balthromaw,

control started tried

↓

and that was fucked up.

fucked

↓

Nobody should control anyone,

control nobody

↓

especially that guy up there.

especially

↓

And, um, you can eat butt if you want, I guess.

butt

↓

- I, uh... - I got this, Morty.

morty

↓

Okay, listen up, slut dragons!

dragons slut

↓

Wouldn't you rather be sluts up there,

sluts

↓

have a fuck world instead of a fuck cave?

cave fuck world

↓

What's wrong with you?

↓

This man with a ponytail makes a valid point.

makes point valid

↓

All dragons are sluts deep down, even the ones up above,

deep dragons ones sluts

↓

but we would have to kill the wizard to be free.

free kill wizard

↓

He is too powerful.

powerful

↓

There is a way to kill the wizard.

kill wizard

↓

Whoa. Who's this mysterious character?

character mysterious whoa

↓

Shadow Jacker, you haven't come out

shadow

↓

of your masturbation cave in eons.

cave masturbation

↓

It's high time I emerge from my cum cocoon.

cocoon

↓

I grow tired of eavesdropping and masturbating

grow masturbating tired

↓

to the sounds you all make.

sounds

↓

Jesus Christ. All right.

christ jesus jesus-christ

↓

C-Could use a little more mystery.

mystery

↓

Oh, oh, just now seeing the staff.

seeing staff

↓

We've never had enough sluts to defeat the wizard.

defeat sluts wizard

↓

Now, with the four fresh, wet sluts that

four fresh sluts

↓

just landed on our doorstep, we finally have a chance.

chance doorstep finally landed

↓

So killing the wizard will break my soul bond.

bond break killing soul wizard

↓

Yes, it solves all of our problems.

problems solves

↓

We must begin a 10-slut soul orgy...

begin must orgy slut soul

↓

Wait, wait, what?

↓

And become the all-slut slut phoenix dragon, Slut.

become dragon slut

↓

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Hold on.

↓

There's got to be something else in here.

↓

There's got to be another way. Just give me a second.

another second

↓

Ihaven%read all this yet.

read

↓

Maybe don't tell your parents we did this?

parents

↓

Oh, oh, no. Oh... Wait, please, no!

↓

Ice spell! Ice spell!

spell

↓

Oh, God!

↓

That just made it last longer.

longer

↓

Ah, it burns longer!

burns longer

↓

Ah, I could have died fast!

died fast

↓

Thank you, strangers.

strangers

↓

Well, it's your world now. Have fun with empowerment.

fun world

↓

It seems to make everyone that gets it really happy.

happy seems

↓

All right, guys. I'll use this to open a portal.

open portal

↓

Uh, open a portal to Earth.

earth open portal

↓

Let's get the hell out of here fast.

fast

↓

God, look at this piece of shit.

piece

↓

Why is there writing on it? Who writes on a portal?

portal writes writing

↓

Should've taken me up on those Wolverine claws instead, Morty.

claws morty shouldve taken

↓

Wait, why did the dragon come?

dragon

↓

I was thinking we could hang out?

hang thinking

↓

Oh, yeah. Whoa, Jesus.

jesus whoa

↓

Your dad's been texting me this whole time?

dads texting whole

↓

Uh, he's at an airport with a cat.

airport

↓

Okay, that... That sounds... Wow.

sounds

↓

You know, I better check on him.

check

↓

Big season finale right there, you know?

finale season

↓

Better, uh... Better go right now.

↓

Also, I told you not to get a dragon, Morty.

dragon morty

↓

This is your fault. Fuck you, worst adventure ever.

adventure fault fuck worst

↓

Worst adventure ever.

adventure worst

↓

Yeah, uh, I guess you better be on your way too, Balthromaw.

↓

Well, I've been thinking.

thinking

↓

What you said back there in the cave really resonated with me.

cave

↓

Maybe we could try again?

↓

Look, to be honest, I'm kind of grossed out

grossed honest

↓

with the sexual nature of how everything unfolded.

nature sexual

↓

I didn't know how sexual dragons were.

dragons sexual

↓

I kind of just wanted to do some D&D stuff, you know?

stuff wanted

↓

And have a soul orgy with your sister and grandpa

grandpa orgy sister soul

↓

and every dragon we could find, yeah?

dragon

↓

No, look, can you please just go?

↓

I-I-I really want to shower.

shower

↓

Maybe a quick soul bone before I go.

bone quick soul

↓

I- - -I'm good.

↓

I think I just need to be alone

alone

↓

and sort of un... unpack all this.

unpack

↓

What about your grandpa?

grandpa

↓

Would he want to? I can wait.

↓

No, I think you better go.

↓

I-I'm gonna take that shower.

shower

↓

If it's just warm liquid you want trickled over your body,

body liquid warm

↓

- I could maybe... - No, no, look.

↓

I just want to be clean!

clean

↓

I-I-I feel dirty after everything that's happened.

dirty happened

↓

How about a quick hand bond?

bond hand quick

↓

- I like doing it. - You're embarrassing yourself.

embarrassing

↓

I- -I'm closing the door.

closing door

↓

Fucking soul teasers.

fucking soul

↓

This is a cool car. I like having fun.

cool fun having

↓

That's what I'm talking about. Keep it moving.

moving

↓

Don't ask why I can talk.

↓

- Mm, mm, mm. - Uh-huh.

↓

For sure. For sure.

↓

Where are we going?

↓

Quantum radiator might need some nanowater.

might quantum radiator

↓

We... We can stretch our legs.

legs stretch

↓

So, uh, why can you talk?

↓

What is this?

↓

I need you in one spot for a clean mind scan.

clean mind scan spot

↓

Mind scan? Look, you're overthinking it.

mind scan

↓

The point of a talking cat is to have fun.

fun point

↓

I find the insinuation that I can't ask questions

questions

↓

and have fun condescending.

condescending fun

↓

Y-You find it condescending, Jerry?

condescending jerry

↓

Yes.

↓

All right. I'm from outer space.

outer outer-space space

↓

- Happy? - No.

happy

↓

Exactly, because no answer would be satisfying.

answer satisfying

↓

Because it's a lie.

↓

Let's see the truth.

truth

↓

What in the...

↓

Oh, son of a bitch.

bitch

↓

- Jerry, don't. - I want to see.

jerry

↓

No, you do not.

↓

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

↓

At least now maybe...

least

↓

Get the hell out of here!

↓

But I've got nowhere to go.

↓

- Get out! - Get out!

↓

Get out!

↓

He was in my home where I keep photos of my parents.

home parents photos

↓

Jerry, I have a device.

device jerry

↓

I-It can make us forget.

forget

↓

No, I don't think we should forget,

forget

↓

not this.

↓

Someone has to remember.

remember

↓

Someone will.

↓

Did we crash?

crash

↓

Where's the cat?

↓

He, uh, ran away.

↓

- Did you scan his brain? - Yeah.

brain scan

↓

Did you find out why he can talk?

↓

He's from outer space.

outer outer-space space

↓

Outer space?

outer outer-space space

↓

That little...

↓

Of course, total mind fuck.

course fuck mind total

↓

Now, that's what I call draggin'.

↓

- What? - It's a joke.

joke

↓

You're a dragon draggin' your stuff.

dragon stuff

↓

I understand.

↓

So, how you doing?

↓

I grow weary of you humans.

grow humans weary

↓

How about 50 bucks? You weary of 50 bucks?

bucks weary

↓

I'm trying to cheat on my wife.

cheat wife

↓

I'm looking for a little magic, a little fantasy.

fantasy looking magic

↓

You could use some help. Let's help each other, huh?

↓

50 bucks.

bucks

↓

Slut!

slut

↓

Nice.

↓

Is there a reason you can speak?

reason speak

↓

Yeah, and I'm ashamed of it.

ashamed

↓

Then speak of it no more.

speak

↓

Do you wish to eat, maybe bond a little?

bond wish

↓

Yeah, I could bond.

bond

↓

How long does it take you to fly to Florida?

florida