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Home » Rick and Morty » S02E09 — Look Who's Purging Now

Rick and Morty

Season 2, Episode 9 — Look Who's Purging Now

TMDB episode metadata

Show: Rick and Morty

Episode title: Look Who's Purging Now

Air date: September 27, 2015

Director: Dominic Polcino

Top billed cast: Justin Roiland, Chris Parnell, Spencer Grammer, Sarah Chalke

Morty makes a mistake and Jerry and Summer work on their father-daughter relationship.

Source: TMDB

↓

I GOT TO TELL YOU, RICK. IT'S PRETTY GREAT

rick

↓

TO BE IN THIS SPACESHIP, JUST THE TWO OF US, YOU KNOW?

↓

JUST CRUISING AROUND, RICK AND MORTY STYLE.

cruising morty rick style

↓

I AGREE, MORTY. [ BELCHES ]

agree belches morty

↓

IT'S NICE TO GET BACK TO THE BASICS

basics

↓

AFTER A PRETTY INTENSE, MIXED-BAG OF A YEAR.

intense mixed

↓

-OHH! -RELAX.

relax

↓

THAT'S WHAT WINDSHIELDS ARE FOR.

↓

I DIDN'T KNOW THAT THERE WERE BUGS OUT IN SPACE.

bugs space

↓

WELL, W-WHAT DID YOU THINK, MORTY?

morty

↓

LIFE JUST DEVELOPED ON EARTH BY ITSELF?

developed earth life

↓

HERE, LET ME TAKE CARE OF THIS.

care

↓

GEEZ, RICK, THAT'S DISGUSTING.

disgusting geez rick

↓

I DON'T WANT TO LOOK AT THAT.

↓

YEAH, GUESS I'M OUT OF FLUID.

fluid

↓

L-LET ME FIND A PLACE TO STOP.

place

↓

HEY, MUCHACHO, DOES YOUR PLANET HAVE WIPER FLUID YET,

fluid planet

↓

OR ARE YOU GONNA FREAK OUT AND START WORSHIPPING US?

freak start worshipping

↓

THE GENERAL STORE OUGHT TO HAVE WHAT YOU NEED.

general ought store

↓

THANKS.

thanks

↓

OF COURSE, YOU'LL BE WANTING TO BE GONE FROM HERE BY SUNDOWN.

course gone wanting

↓

YEAH, SURE THING. WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT? WHY?

minute

↓

SUNDOWN IS WHEN THE FESTIVAL BEGINS.

begins festival

↓

THE FESTIVAL?

festival

↓

OOH, WELL, FOR MILLENNIA,

↓

OUR SOCIETY HAS BEEN FREE OF CRIME AND WAR,

crime free society

↓

-LIVING IN PERFECT PEACE. -OH, I KNOW WHAT THIS IS!

living peace perfect

↓

YOU'VE BEEN ABLE TO SUSTAIN WORLD PEACE

able peace sustain world

↓

BECAUSE YOU HAVE ONE NIGHT A YEAR WHERE YOU ALL RUN AROUND

night

↓

ROBBING AND MURDERING EACH OTHER WITHOUT CONSEQUENCE.

consequence murdering robbing

↓

-THAT'S RIGHT. -WHAT?!

↓

IT'S LIKE "THE PURGE," MORTY. THAT MOVIE "THE PURGE"?

morty movie

↓

OH, HAVE YOU BEEN HERE BEFORE?

↓

NO, NO, BUT I'VE BEEN TO A FEW PLANETS WITH THE SAME GIMMICK.

planets

↓

YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES IT'S CALLED THE CLEANSING OR THE RED TIME.

called sometimes

↓

THERE WAS THIS ONE WORLD THAT CALLED IT JUST MURDER NIGHT.

called murder night world

↓

I-IT'S A PURGE PLANET.

planet

↓

THEY'RE PEACEFUL, AND THEN, YOU KNOW, THEY JUST PURGE.

peaceful

↓

T-THAT'S HORRIBLE!

horrible

↓

YEAH.

↓

YOU WANT TO CHECK IT OUT?

check

↓

♪♪

↓

[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ]

crackling electricity

↓

SO, WHAT DO YOU DO DURING THE FESTIVAL?

festival

↓

YOU LOCK YOURSELF IN, OR YOU GO OUT AND DO SOME STUFF?

lock stuff

↓

OH, I DO SOME PRETTY BAD STUFF.

stuff

↓

OH, I BET YOU DO, OLD TIMER. [ LAUGHS ]

laughs timer

↓

GEE-- RICK, COME ON. THE SUN IS SETTING.

rick setting

↓

W-WE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.

↓

ALL RIGHT, WELL, W-WHAT DO I OWE YOU FOR THE WIPER FLUID?

fluid

↓

IT'S ON THE HOUSE. OH, AND, UH,

house

↓

WHY -- WHY DON'T YOU HAVE SOME CANDY BARS, AS WELL?

bars candy candy-bars

↓

OH, NO WAY. THAT'S REALLY NICE OF YOU.

↓

I'M A NICE GUY... FOR NOW.

↓

[ Chuckling ] OHH, I DON'T DOUBT IT.

chuckling doubt

↓

-RICK! -YEAH, YEAH.

rick

↓

HEY, HAVE A GOOD FESTIVAL, OLD TIMER.

festival timer

↓

I INTEND TO.

intend

↓

RICK, UNLOCK IT!

rick unlock

↓

JUST A SECOND, MORTY.

morty second

↓

OH, LOOK AT THAT SUNSET.

sunset

↓

STOP SCREWING AROUND.

screwing

↓

[ CLICK ]

click

↓

THERE WE GO. MUCH BETTER. NOW WE CAN SEE.

↓

GREAT.

↓

HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT, MORTY?

morty

↓

WHY DON'T WE CHRISTEN OUR SQUEAKY-CLEAN WINDSHIELD HERE

clean squeaky windshield

↓

BY WATCHING A LITTLE OF THIS PURGE THROUGH IT?

watching

↓

WHAT?! NO! WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!

problem

↓

MORTY, GROW UP. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO WATCH,

grow morty watch

↓

DON'T WATCH, BUT, YOU KNOW, IT'S MY CAR.

watch

↓

[ BELCHES ] ALSO, IF YOU TELL YOUR MOM ABOUT THIS,

belches

↓

-I'LL PURGE YOU. -YOU'RE THE WORST.

worst

↓

AND THIS PLANET IS THE WORST. HOW CAN YOU BE INTO THIS?

planet worst

↓

YOU KNOW, PEOPLE ARE GONNA KILL EACH OTHER.

kill

↓

SO, WHAT, Y-Y-YOU TRYING TO SIT HERE AND TELL ME THAT

↓

[BELCHES] I-IF -- IF THERE'S A VIDEO ONLINE

belches online video

↓

WITH SOMEONE GETTING DECAPITATED,

decapitated

↓

-YOU DON'T CLICK ON IT? -NO!

click

↓

WHY -- WHY WOULD I DO THAT? YOU DO THAT?

↓

I DON'T, BECAUSE IT WOULD BORE ME.

bore

↓

I SEE SHIT LIKE THAT FOR BREAKFAST, MORTY.

breakfast morty

↓

BUT IF YOU DON'T DO IT, I SAY IT'S BECAUSE

↓

YOU'RE AFRAID OF YOUR OWN PRIMAL INSTINCTS.

afraid instincts primal

↓

-SO YOU STUFF THEM DOWN AND -- -[ BELL CHIMING ]

bell chiming stuff

↓

OH, OH! Shh. Shh. IT'S STARTING.

starting

↓

-OH-HO-HO! HERE WE GO. -I'M NOT WATCHING.

watching

↓

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YOUR MEDAL'S IN THE MAIL.

mail

↓

-I'M GONNA GET A CLOSER LOOK. -OH, OKAY, SURE.

closer

↓

AND THEN SOMEONE'S GONNA THROW A ROCK

rock someones throw

↓

AND HIT THE CAR AND THEN WE'RE GONNA CRASH

crash

↓

AND WE'RE GONNA BE STUCK DOWN THERE

stuck

↓

AND IT'S GONNA BE WHAT WE DESERVE.

deserve

↓

YAWN.

yawn

↓

-WHOA! -[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]

indistinct indistinct-shouting shouting whoa

↓

WHOA, THEY ARE PURGING THE FUCK OUT OF EACH OTHER.

fuck whoa

↓

[ MUFFLED SCREAMING ]

muffled screaming

↓

OH, MY GOD!

↓

OH, FUCK.

fuck

↓

THAT WAS -- OKAY, YEAH. T-THAT WAS GROSS.

gross

↓

WOW. MAN, I THINK MY EYES WERE BIGGER THAN MY STOMACH

bigger eyes stomach

↓

ON THIS ONE, MORTY. UGH.

morty

↓

MY APPETITE FOR PURGE-SPECTATING GOT FILLED PRETTY QUICK.

appetite filled quick

↓

OH, GOD. [ GRUNTS ]

grunts

↓

[ RETCHING ]

retching

↓

[ WOMAN SCREAMING ]

screaming woman

↓

GET AWAY FROM ME!

↓

NO! NO! HELP!

↓

SOMEBODY HELP ME! AAH!

somebody

↓

ALL RIGHT, MORTY. L-LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

morty

↓

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. HOLD ON. W-WE HAVE TO GO DOWN THERE.

↓

[ Belching ] WHAT? WHY?

↓

THAT POOR GIRL. W-WE HAVE TO SAVE HER.

girl poor save

↓

UH, MORTY, IN SPACE, WE HAVE SOMETHING WE CALL

morty space

↓

THE NON-INTERFERENCE POLICY. WE GOT THE WIPER FLUID.

fluid interference policy

↓

WE WATCHED THEM KILL EACH OTHER. WE'RE LEAVING.

kill leaving watched

↓

HELP ME SAVE THAT GIRL, OR I'M TELLING MOM YOU BROUGHT ME HERE.

brought girl save telling

↓

-YOU LITTLE TURD. -[ SCREAMING ]

screaming turd

↓

PLEASE! LEAVE ME ALONE!

alone

↓

LEAVE YOU ALONE? DURING A PURGE?

alone

↓

I DON'T THINK SO, BABY.

baby

↓

IT'S OKAY. WE'RE NOT GONNA HURT YOU.

hurt

↓

MY NAME IS MORTY. THIS IS MY GRANDPA.

grandpa morty name

↓

-WE'RE TOURISTS. -NOT ANYMORE.

anymore tourists

↓

-AAH! -AAH!

↓

OH, MY GOD. THIS IS FUCKING AWESOME!

awesome fucking

↓

MORTY, THIS IS REALLY COOL.

cool morty

↓

HEY, Y-YOU WANT TO HELP ME OUT HERE AND KILL SOME PEOPLE?

kill

↓

IT'S FUN. WE'RE TOTALLY JUSTIFIED

fun justified

↓

BECAUSE WE'RE SAVING A LITTLE GIRL.

girl saving

↓

I MEAN, W-W-WE'RE BOTH FREE AND CLEAR TO MURDER THESE PEOPLE.

clear free murder

↓

-ARE YOU OKAY? -YES.

↓

I HAVE TO FIND SOMEWHERE TO HIDE.

hide

↓

WELL, YOU CAN HIDE WITH US. RICK?

hide rick

↓

-YEAH? -DO YOU THINK WE COULD TAKE --

↓

-W-WHAT'S YOUR NAME? -ARTHRISHA.

name

↓

COULD WE TAKE ARTHRISHA UP IN THE SHIP

ship

↓

AND, YOU KNOW, JUST WAIT OUT THE PURGE?

↓

OH, MORTY, HOW CAN I REFUSE

morty refuse

↓

AFTER ALL YOU'VE DONE TO BLACKMAIL ME?

blackmail

↓

YOUR VEHICLE -- IS IT FROM THE GODS?

gods vehicle

↓

-NO. -YES.

↓

SO, UH, YOU KNOW, WHEN THE PURGE STARTED,

started

↓

DID PEOPLE GET INTO IT RIGHT AWAY,

↓

OR WERE THEY LIKE, "WAIT, WHAT?

↓

THIS IS GONNA STOP CRIME HOW, EXACTLY?"

crime

↓

YEAH, IT TOOK SOME TIME FOR PEOPLE TO ACCEPT IT.

accept

↓

YEAH, I BET. [ CHUCKLES ] I BET.

chuckles

↓

YEAH, IT'S KIND OF LIKE CELLPHONES, YOU KNOW?

↓

AT FIRST, EVERYONE WAS LIKE,

↓

"LOOK AT THOSE DOUCHEBAGS PURGING,"

↓

AND THEN THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW,

↓

THEY'RE LIKE, "IT'S JUST SO CONVENIENT."

convenient

↓

GEEZ, YOU WORKING ON YOUR TIGHT FIVE

five geez tight working

↓

FOR THE COMEDY STORE, MORTY?

comedy morty store

↓

WHATCHA DOING?

whatcha

↓

WATCHING SOME TV, PLAYING ON YOUR PHONE?

phone playing watching

↓

-IS THAT A REAL QUESTION? -JUST MAKING CONVERSATION.

conversation question real real-question

↓

ARE YOU? WHAT PART OF THAT GIVES ME ANYTHING TO WORK WITH?

gives part

↓

MY CHOICE IS TO SAY NOTHING, BE SARCASTIC,

choice sarcastic

↓

OR BARK "YES" LIKE A TRAINED ANIMAL.

animal bark trained

↓

IT'S NOT A CONVERSATION.

conversation

↓

YOU'RE HOLDING ME VERBALLY HOSTAGE.

holding hostage

↓

OKAY, ASS-FACE. I'LL GO IN THE KITCHEN.

face kitchen

↓

-HEY, DAD. -YEAH?

↓

WHATCHA DOING? GOING INTO THE KITCHEN?

kitchen whatcha

↓

OKAY.

↓

-YEAH, YOU LIKE THAT? -SCREW YOU.

screw

↓

SO, UH, DO MOST PEOPLE WEAR MASKS WHEN THEY PURGE?

masks wear

↓

I-I DON'T WANT TO ANSWER ANY MORE PURGE QUESTIONS.

answer questions

↓

ALL RIGHT, HEY, HEY, THAT'S COOL.

cool

↓

I CAN ROLL WITH THAT.

roll

↓

[ BLOWING RASPBERRIES ]

blowing

↓

-[ GASPS ] MY NANA! -HUH?

gasps nana

↓

MY NANA! WE HAVE TO SAVE HER!

nana save

↓

YOU JUST NOW REMEMBERED YOUR NANA EXISTS.

exists nana remembered

↓

I-I WAS TRAUMATIZED.

traumatized

↓

HAVEN'T YOU BEEN THROUGH LIKE 15 PURGES?

↓

I MEAN, SOME AS A CHILD?

child

↓

WILL SOMEBODY JUST HELP ME GET HER?

somebody

↓

FINE, WHATEVER. MORTY, STAY.

morty

↓

OH, GOD. OH, CRAP. OH, CRAP!

↓

-GET OUT! GET OUT! -HEY, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!

whoa

↓

GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE FLYING MACHINE!

flying fuck machine

↓

OH, MY GOD! O-OKAY! OKAY!

↓

-BACK UP, ASSHOLE. -[ WHIMPERS ]

asshole whimpers

↓

-BACK UP. -OHH.

↓

-BACK THE FUCK UP! -AAH!

fuck

↓

FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH, I'M SORRY,

worth

↓

BUT THAT'S NOT REALLY WORTH ANYTHING TONIGHT, IS IT?

tonight worth

↓

Y-YOU CAN'T LEAVE US HERE. YOU'RE KILLING US!

killing

↓

YOU HEAR ME? COME BACK.

↓

Y-YOU GOT TO COME BACK. CHANGE YOUR MIND.

change mind

↓

OH, GEEZ.

geez

↓

MORTY! AAH! FUCKIN' AMISH BITCH SHOT ME!

bitch fuckin morty shot

↓

[ GRUNTS ] SHE TRIED TO PURGE ME, MORTY.

grunts morty tried

↓

YOU LET YOUR WIENER DO THE WALKING, AND NOW I'M DEAD.

dead walking wiener

↓

-RICK, SHE TOOK THE CAR! -YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, MORTY?!

fucking fucking-kidding kidding morty rick

↓

SHE TOOK MY CAR AND THE GUN.

↓

WE'RE LIKE THE REST OF THESE ASSHOLES NOW.

assholes rest

↓

W-W-WE'RE GONNA GET PURGED, MORTY.

morty

↓

HELP ME UP.

↓

OH, GEEZ, GEEZ! WAIT A MINUTE, RICK.

geez minute rick

↓

WHY DON'T WE JUST USE YOUR PORTAL GUN?

portal

↓

IT'S IN THE CAR, DIP-ASS.

↓

[ GRUNTS ] OH, GOD, IT HURTS.

grunts hurts

↓

SHE GOT ME RIGHT IN THE GODDAMN LIVER, MORTY.

goddamn liver morty

↓

IT'S THE HARDEST-WORKING LIVER IN THE GALAXY, MORTY,

galaxy hardest liver morty working

↓

AND NOW IT HAS A HOLE IN IT. I HOPE IT WAS WORTH IT.

hole hope worth

↓

I WAS JUST TRYING TO DO RIGHT.

↓

YEAH, WELL, THAT'S NOT REALLY THE THEME OF TONIGHT'S PARTY.

party theme tonights

↓

HEADS UP. RAPISTS.

heads

↓

WELL, DON'T JUST STAND THERE, MORTY.

morty stand

↓

-PURGE 'EM. -ME?

↓

NO, ME. SHOULD I RUB MY LIVER HOLE ON THEM?

hole liver

↓

PICK UP A STICK OR SOMETHING AND KILL THEM.

kill pick stick

↓

-UM, W-WE COME IN PEACE. -[ SCREAMING ]

peace screaming

↓

OH, MY GOD. [ GRUNTS ]

grunts

↓

THERE'S MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM!

↓

YOU WANT TO GET PURGED, YOU BRING IT!

bring

↓

DROP [BELCHES] DROP YOUR SHIT! DROP IT ALL.

belches drop

↓

MORTY, GO GET THEIR SHIT. HURRY UP.

hurry morty

↓

I ONLY HAD ONE OF THOSE THINGS I THREW.

threw

↓

I'M HOLDING A BOX OF TIC TACS RIGHT NOW.

holding

↓

-WANT SOME CRACKERS? -NO, THANK YOU.

crackers

↓

ARE YOU READY TO BE NICE TO ME?

ready

↓

IN EXCHANGE FOR CRACKERS?

crackers exchange

↓

-WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? -DAD, GET A JOB.

happened

↓

YOU'RE TRYING TO CREATE DRAMA BECAUSE YOU'RE BORED.

bored create drama

↓

-OH. -[ BEEPING, WHIRRING ]

beeping whirring

↓

IT'S THE SPACE PHONE GRANDPA GAVE US.

grandpa phone space

↓

-HELLO? -HEY, SUMMER, IT'S GRANDPA.

grandpa summer

↓

I NEED YOU TO DO ME A FAVOR.

favor

↓

-I CAN BARELY HEAR YOU. -WHO IS IT?

barely

↓

Morty and I are on a planet that's purging.

morty planet

↓

-I need you to take down -- -A PLAN THAT'S WHAT?

plan

↓

WE'RE ON A PLANET THAT'S PURGING, SUMMER. PURGING.

planet summer

↓

WE LOST OUR CAR AND MY GUN, AND WE'RE IN A PURGE.

lost

↓

-OOH, IS IT TADDI MASON? -LIKE THE MOVIE "THE PURGE"?

movie

↓

Yes, I-I need you to take --

↓

-THAT MOVIE SUCKED. -OH, MY GOD. HOLD ON.

movie sucked

↓

It's not Taddi Mason?

↓

Dad, who the fuck is Taddi Mason?

fuck

↓

-My friend. -AAH!

friend

↓

ARE YOU OKAY? I'M PUTTING YOU ON SPEAKER.

putting speaker

↓

-TADDI? -YES, JERRY, IT'S TADDI,

jerry

↓

A PERSON NO ONE'S EVER HEARD OF UNTIL NOW,

heard ones person

↓

CALLING YOU ON A SPACE PHONE.

calling phone space

↓

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic.

sarcastic

↓

[ GROWLS ]

growls

↓

AAH!

↓

[ GROWLING ]

growling

↓

[ Gunshots ]

gunshots

↓

RELOAD, FAST.

fast

↓

SUMMER, W-WE NEED YOU TO TAKE DOWN THIS NUMBER.

number summer

↓

-Quit screwing around. -MORTY? ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

morty quit screwing

↓

-No! -WHY ARE YOU WITH TADDI MASON?

↓

Holy shit, Dad! Shut the fuck up!

fuck holy

↓

OKAY. I GUESS I'M JUST THIS ENTIRE FAMILY'S TOILET PAPER.

entire familys paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

ARE YOU WRITING THIS DOWN? WILL YOU PLEASE WRITE THIS DOWN?

write writing

↓

-SUMMER: Yes, yes. -7-7-1-9-8...

summer

↓

[ GROWLING ]

growling

↓

...3-6-4-2-1-1-2-5.

↓

AAH!

↓

[ GROWLING ]

growling

↓

YOU SON OF A BITCH!

bitch

↓

MORTY, I DON'T WANT TO BE THE "A LITTLE HELP" GUY,

morty

↓

BUT A LITTLE HELP?

↓

-AAH! -Okay, I have a pen. Go.

↓

7-7-1-9-8-3- 6-4-2-1-1-2-5.

↓

A SPOON, MORTY?

morty spoon

↓

-A SPOON?! -I'M SORRY.

spoon

↓

THERE'S A PILE OF SILVERWARE NEXT TO YOU,

pile

↓

AND YOU THROW ME THE ONE THING THAT CAN NEVER KILL ANYTHING?

kill throw

↓

ALL RIGHT, OKAY!

↓

Summer, on the shelf above my workbench in the garage,

garage shelf summer

↓

there's a red box with a keypad on it.

↓

You're gonna take that box outside,

↓

and you're gonna type the number I just gave you into the keypad.

number type

↓

-Got it? -GOT IT.

↓

IS IT JUST PART OF GROWING UP TO HATE YOUR DAD?

growing hate part

↓

I'M IGNORING YOU.

ignoring

↓

MORTY, IF I CAN GET TO THE TOP OF THAT LIGHTHOUSE,

lighthouse morty

↓

I CAN SEND THE BEACON, AND YOUR SISTER CAN LAUNCH OUR PACKAGE.

beacon launch package send sister

↓

JUST REMEMBER, IF THERE'S PEOPLE IN THERE

remember

↓

AND THEY TRY TO PURGE US, WE GOT TO PURGE THEM FIRST.

↓

WE'RE NOT PURGING ANYONE, RICK, ALL RIGHT? W-WILL YOU STOP IT?

rick

↓

MORTY, IF WE'RE GONNA SURVIVE TONIGHT,

morty survive tonight

↓

YOU'RE GONNA NEED TO HARNESS YOUR REPRESSED RAGE.

harness rage repressed

↓

I DON'T HAVE ANY!

↓

SPOKEN LIKE A PERSON WITH REPRESSED RAGE.

person rage repressed spoken

↓

[ DOORBELL RINGS ]

doorbell doorbell-rings rings

↓

I TAKE NO PART IN THE FESTIVAL.

festival part

↓

IF YOU DESIRE TO KILL ME, I ONLY ASK YOU DO IT QUICKLY.

desire kill quickly

↓

NO SUCH AGENDA, CHIEF.

agenda chief

↓

WE'RE NOT TOO KEEN ON THE PURGE, EITHER, SIR.

keen

↓

WE WERE JUST HOPING TO GET ON THE ROOF OF YOUR LIGHTHOUSE

hoping lighthouse roof

↓

SO WE CAN SEND A BEACON TO MY SISTER ON EARTH.

beacon earth send sister

↓

-IT'S A DIFFERENT PLANET. -BY THE WAY,

planet

↓

LIFE ON OTHER PLANETS EXISTS. DON'T LET IT DISTRACT YOU.

distract exists life planets

↓

I'LL LET YOU USE MY LIGHTHOUSE FOR SHELTER AND BEACON-SENDING

beacon lighthouse sending shelter

↓

ON THE CONDITION THAT YOU LISTEN TO MY TALE.

condition tale

↓

-OKAY. -DEAL.

deal

↓

ALL RIGHT, I'M GONNA GO TO THE ROOF AND SET THINGS UP.

roof

↓

-MORTY, YOU LISTEN TO HIS TALE. -OKAY.

morty tale

↓

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

clears clears-throat throat

↓

"FADE IN. EXTERIOR. UNNAMED CITY. DAY.

city exterior fade

↓

THE HUSTLE AND BUSTLE IS A SYMPHONY OF PROGRESS.

hustle progress symphony

↓

WE PAN PAST WINDOWS, EACH OF WHICH CONTAIN A DIFFERENT STORY,

past story windows

↓

TO FIND JACEY LAKIMS, 28 -- HOT, BUT DOESN'T KNOW IT.

↓

JACEY STOPS WHEN HER HIGH HEEL GETS CAUGHT

caught heel stops

↓

IN THE GRATING OF A SEWER.

sewer

↓

SUDDENLY, A MAN STEPS INTO FRAME AND POINTS A GUN AT HER.

frame points steps suddenly

↓

THIS IS NOT HER DAY.

↓

FADE TO BLACK.

black fade

↓

TITLE -- 'THREE WEEKS EARLIER.'"

three three-weeks title weeks

↓

[ SIGHS ] YOU REALLY DON'T WANT TO TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS.

sighs

↓

DAD, GRANDPA AND MORTY ARE IN DANGER.

danger grandpa morty

↓

YOU'RE UNEMPLOYED, AND YOU'RE BORED.

bored unemployed

↓

-THEY'RE A HIGHER PRIORITY. -STOP SAYING I'M UNEMPLOYED!

higher priority unemployed

↓

OKAY, 7-7-1-9-8-3-6-4-2-1-1

↓

2 -- AAH!

↓

GOOD LORD! NOW WHAT?

lord

↓

[ WHIRRING, HUMMING ]

humming whirring

↓

LOOK, I'M YOUR FATHER, AND I LOVE YOU IS ALL I'M SAYING.

father love

↓

-I'LL LEAVE IT AT THAT. -FINE, DAD!

↓

[ BOTH SCREAM ]

scream

↓

OH, HE MIGHT HAVE SAID TO TAKE IT OUTSIDE.

might

↓

Rick: COME ON, SUMMER.

rick summer

↓

HOW HARD IS IT TO TYPE SOME NUMBERS INTO A BOX?

hard numbers type

↓

-TARGET LOCKED. -[ DEVICE BEEPS ]

beeps device locked target

↓

OH, THANK GOD.

↓

WELL, I DID MY JOB. SUMMER DID HER JOB.

summer

↓

NOW ALL MORTY HAS TO DO IS FINISH LISTENING TO THAT TALE.

finish listening morty tale

↓

"BLANE: MAYBE I DON'T NEED A NEW FRIEND.

friend

↓

JACEY: MAYBE YOU'RE THE ONLY FRIEND I NEED.

friend

↓

BLANE: NEED, OR WANT?

↓

JACEY: I'VE NEVER BEEN MUCH FOR WANTING.

wanting

↓

BLANE: SPOKEN LIKE SOMEONE WITH NEEDS."

needs spoken

↓

-OH, GEEZ. -HMM?

geez

↓

UH, SORRY. K-KEEP GOING.

↓

"JACEY REACHES OUT AND TOUCHES HIS FACE.

face reaches touches

↓

IT'S CLEAR HE NEEDS WHAT SHE WANTS.

clear needs wants

↓

SHE'S A WOMAN. HE'S A MAN.

woman

↓

THE CITY BURNS IN THE BACKGROUND AS HE TAKES HER IN HIS ARMS.

arms background burns city takes

↓

FADE OUT.

fade

↓

TITLE -- 'THE END'...

title

↓

QUESTION MARK."

mark question question-mark

↓

-WOW. -YEAH?

↓

IT'S... G-GOOD JOB. GOOD JOB.

↓

-YOU LIKED IT? -OF COURSE I DID.

course liked

↓

YOU DIDN'T LAUGH AT THE SCENE IN THE BAR.

laugh scene

↓

I...THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY, BUT I WANTED TO HEAR THE REST.

funny rest wanted

↓

DO YOU HAVE ANY THOUGHTS? NOTES?

notes thoughts

↓

NO. I-I JUST ENJOYED IT.

enjoyed

↓

THAT'S MY NOTE, YOU KNOW? PLEASE WRITE MORE.

note write

↓

-SEEMS A LITTLE INSINCERE. -WHAT? NO.

seems

↓

YOU DON'T HAVE TO MOLLYCODDLE ME.

↓

I WANT TO IMPROVE MY WRITING. TELL ME YOUR REAL THOUGHTS.

improve real thoughts writing

↓

ALL RIGHT. WELL, UM, I'M NOT A HUGE FAN, PERSONALLY,

huge personally

↓

OF THE WHOLE "THREE WEEKS EARLIER" TEASER THING.

three three-weeks weeks whole

↓

I FEEL LIKE, YOU KNOW,

↓

WE SHOULD START OUR STORIES WHERE THEY BEGIN

begin start stories

↓

NOT START THEM WHERE THEY GET INTEREST--

interest start

↓

-GET OUT. -UM, WHAT?

↓

NO, I'M SICK OF THIS. YOU BANG ON MY DOOR,

bang door sick

↓

YOU BEG ME TO HELP YOU, I SHARE SOMETHING PERSONAL WITH YOU,

personal share

↓

AND YOU TAKE A GIANT SHIT ON IT.

giant

↓

HEY, MAN, WE ASKED IF WE COULD PUT UP A BEACON --

asked beacon

↓

WELL, YOU CAN'T. I WANT YOU OUT OF HERE.

↓

YOU'RE A PETTY PERSON, AND YOU'RE INSECURE,

insecure person petty

↓

AND YOU'RE TAKING IT OUT ON ME. THAT'S A GOOD SCRIPT.

script

↓

WHAT THE HELL?!

↓

I DON'T CARE. I WANT YOU OUT.

care

↓

-WHAT? -TAKE THAT THING DOWN.

↓

YOUR GRANDSON IS A SHITTY PERSON. LEAVE NOW.

grandson person shitty

↓

-MORTY! -RICK, I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.

morty rick

↓

I SAT THROUGH HIS ENTIRE SCREENPLAY --

entire screenplay

↓

YOU "SAT THROUGH IT"?

↓

YES! DID YOU WANT ME TO WEEP WITH JOY?

weep

↓

-IT'S TERRIBLE! -WHOA! MORTY! WE'RE GUESTS HERE.

guests morty whoa

↓

I TRIED TO BE A GOOD GUEST! HE DRAGGED IT OUT OF ME!

dragged guest tried

↓

-I'M TAKING DOWN THIS BEACON. -NO, STOP! THAT'S NOT FAIR!

beacon fair

↓

JUST BECAUSE YOU HATE YOUR OWN WRITING

hate writing

↓

DOESN'T MAKE ME A BAD PERSON!

person

↓

AAH!

↓

YOU LIKE THAT? YOU WANT ME TO CUT TO THREE WEEKS EARLIER

three three-weeks weeks

↓

WHEN YOU WERE ALIVE?

alive

↓

WHOA, MORTY. YOU JUST PURGED.

morty whoa

↓

-BEACON ARRIVING. -[ DEVICE BEEPS ]

arriving beacon beeps device

↓

OKAY, TIME TO GO.

↓

-WELL, TERRIFIC. -[ SIGHS ]

sighs terrific

↓

DAD, WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT'S THE DEAL HERE?

deal

↓

I JUST WANTED TO SPEND SOME TIME WITH MY DAUGHTER.

daughter spend wanted

↓

YOU'RE GROWING UP SO FAST.

fast growing

↓

-YOU USED TO BE MY LITTLE GIRL. -[ CHUCKLES ] YEAH.

chuckles girl used

↓

REMEMBER WHEN WE USED TO GO TO THE PLAYGROUND,

playground remember used

↓

AND I'D PUSH YOU ON THE SWINGS?

push swings

↓

OH, YOU COULD PUSH ME HIGHER THAN ALL THE OTHER KIDS.

higher kids push

↓

YOU WERE SO SMALL AND CUTE.

cute

↓

I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA FLY RIGHT OFF INTO THE STREET.

street

↓

[ Chuckling ] I USED TO PEE MY PANTS.

chuckling pants used

↓

I KNOW, AND NOW LOOK AT YOU!

↓

YOU HAVE A JOB. YOU'RE MAKING REALLY GOOD MONEY.

money

↓

YOU'RE NOT PAYING ANY RENT,

paying rent

↓

SO YOU HAVE PLENTY OF DISPOSABLE INCOME.

income plenty

↓

OH, GOD, DAD. PLEASE, DON'T.

↓

I JUST NEED A FEW HUNDRED DOLLARS

dollars hundred hundred-dollars

↓

TO GET THROUGH THE MONTH. I HAVE SOME INTERVIEWS COMING UP.

coming interviews month

↓

SOMETHING'S GONNA COME THROUGH. I CAN FEEL IT.

somethings

↓

I'M GOING INSIDE.

↓

[ DOOR SHUTS ]

door door-shuts shuts

↓

[ SIGHS ] I GUESS THIS IS WHAT ROCK BOTTOM FEELS LIKE, JERRY.

bottom feels jerry rock rock-bottom sighs

↓

OW!

↓

IT'S OKAY, MORTY. IT'S THE PURGE, YOU KNOW?

morty

↓

PUSHING OLD LIGHTHOUSE KEEPERS DOWN THE STAIRS IS TOTALLY COOL.

cool keepers lighthouse pushing stairs

↓

IT'S NOT COOL, RICK. I-I'M NOT LIKE THESE PEOPLE.

cool rick

↓

I CAN'T RUN AROUND CHOPPING PEOPLE'S HEADS OFF

chopping heads peoples peoples-heads

↓

ONE DAY A YEAR AND THEN SLEEP WELL THE REST OF THE TIME.

rest sleep

↓

WELL, YOU BETTER START GETTING USED TO IT, LITTLE BITCH,

bitch start used

↓

BECAUSE WE GOT SOME FUCKING COMPANY.

company fucking

↓

HEY, THERE HE IS.

↓

HERE I AM.

↓

[ BEACON WHIRRING ]

beacon whirring

↓

MORTY.

morty

↓

TIME TO [BELCHES] PURGE.

belches

↓

[ GUNFIRE, SCREAMING ]

gunfire screaming

↓

[ TONY! TONI! TONé!'s "FEELS GOOD" PLAYS ]

feels plays tony

↓

-[ SCREAMING ] -♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels screaming

↓

♪ YEAH ♪

↓

♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

♪ HOLDIN' YOU SO ♪

↓

♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

GEEZ. WOW, MORTY. NOW YOU'RE GETTING INTO IT.

geez morty

↓

NEVER EXPECTED THAT OUT OF YOU.

expected

↓

ALL RIGHT, UH, LET'S GO FIND MY SHIP.

ship

↓

HEY, HEY, MORTY, MORTY. THERE IT IS DOWN THERE -- MY SHIP.

morty ship

↓

IT LOOKS TO ME LIKE THE... MORTY?

morty

↓

[ GUNFIRE ]

gunfire

↓

-SUCK MY DICK! -♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

dick feels suck

↓

EAT THIS!

↓

OOH, BOY, YOU'RE REALLY, UH...

↓

-HA-HA! HA! -♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

YOU'RE REALLY GOING FOR IT OVER THERE, HUH?

↓

I, UH [BELCHES] I THINK, UH [BELCHES]

belches

↓

I THINK THOSE PEOPLE WERE JUST HIDING.

hiding

↓

-I DON'T GIVE A SHIT! -[ GUNFIRE ]

gunfire

↓

OKAY, MORTY, NOW YOU'RE JUST SHOOTING CORPSES.

corpses morty shooting

↓

-HOW DO YOU LIKE THIS? -OKAY, BUDDY.

buddy

↓

ALL RIGHT. THAT'S GOOD. GOOD JOB.

↓

[ SCREAMS ]

screams

↓

TIME TO GO HOME.

home

↓

[ WEAPON CHARGING ]

charging weapon

↓

WAIT, STOP! PLEASE, DON'T KILL ME!

kill

↓

I-I NEVER INTENDED TO HARM YOU, I SWEAR.

harm intended swear

↓

I AM TRYING TO END THE FESTIVAL.

festival

↓

-W-W-WHAT DO YOU MEAN? -I WAS GOING TO USE YOUR SHIP

ship

↓

TO DESTROY THE RICH ASSHOLES THAT RUN OUR SOCIETY

assholes destroy rich society

↓

AND SAVE MY PEOPLE FROM THE HORRORS OF THIS YEARLY FESTIVAL.

festival save

↓

FUCK THAT, RICK! WE GOT TO KILL HER! KILL HER! KILL HER!

fuck kill rick

↓

WHOA! GEEZ, MORTY, PURGE IT DOWN A LITTLE.

geez morty whoa

↓

"PURGE! DON'T PURGE!"

↓

YOU'RE SENDING ME MIXED MESSAGES, RICK.

messages mixed rick sending

↓

MORTY [BELCHES] YOU'RE ACTING LIKE

acting belches morty

↓

A [BELCHES] FREAKING LUNATIC.

belches freaking lunatic

↓

-CALM DOWN. -SCREW YOU, RICK!

calm rick screw

↓

I'LL PURGE YOU, TOO, YOU OLD, RICKETY PIECE OF CRAP!

piece rickety

↓

THIS HAS BEEN A LONG TIME COMING!

coming

↓

I'M GONNA RIP YOUR FUCKING GUTS OUT

fucking guts

↓

AND SMEAR THEM ALL OVER YOUR FACE!

face smear

↓

I AIN'T TAKING NO SH--

aint

↓

-AAH! -OKAY, S-SORRY ABOUT THAT.

↓

NOW, WHERE ARE THESE RICH PEOPLE?

rich

↓

[ STRING QUARTET PLAYING ]

playing string

↓

[ GLASS CLINKING ]

clinking glass

↓

TO ANOTHER SUCCESSFUL YEAR OF THE FESTIVAL,

another festival successful

↓

PITTING POOR PEOPLE AGAINST EACH OTHER FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS.

poor thousands years

↓

[ TONY! TONI! TONé!'S "FEELS GOOD" PLAYS ]

feels plays tony

↓

WAIT, W-WHERE IS THAT MUSIC COMING FROM?

coming music

↓

-WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS? -♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels meaning

↓

HERE'S THE DEAL. I'M NOT HERE TO JUDGE.

deal judge

↓

I'M JUST A GUY FROM ANOTHER PLANET.

another another-planet planet

↓

BUT THIS GIRL IS ONE OF YOUR POOR PEOPLE,

girl poor

↓

AND I GUESS YOU GUYS FELT LIKE IT WAS OKAY

↓

TO SUBJECT HER TO INHUMAN CONDITIONS

conditions subject

↓

BECAUSE THERE WAS NO CHANCE OF IT EVER HURTING YOU.

chance hurting

↓

IT'S SORT OF THE SOCIO-POLITICAL EQUIVALENT

political

↓

OF, SAY, A SUIT OF POWER ARMOR AROUND YOU.

armor power suit

↓

BUT NOW THINGS ARE EVENED OUT, SO, ARTHRISHA?

↓

[ ALL GASP ]

gasp

↓

HAPPY FESTIVAL, COCKSUCKERS!

festival happy

↓

SUCK MY COCK! CHEW MY BALLS!

balls chew cock suck

↓

SUCK MY HUGE DICK!

dick huge suck

↓

-GEEZ. -♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels geez

↓

YOU WANT TO GET IN ON THIS, RICK?

rick

↓

NO, I REALLY -- HONESTLY, I-I'VE HAD MY FILL.

fill

↓

IT'S GRATUITOUS AT THIS POINT.

point

↓

YOU SURE YOU DON'T WANT TO JOIN IN?

join

↓

-THIS IS REALLY AMAZING. -♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

amazing feels

↓

YEAH, BUT --

↓

AH, ALL RIGHT. FUCK IT.

fuck

↓

♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

YEAH, BITCH, WHAT'S UP?

bitch

↓

♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

♪ YEAH ♪

↓

♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

WHOA!

whoa

↓

♪ OHH, IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

OKAY, NOW IT'S TIME WE DO A LITTLE DANCING

dancing

↓

-TO -- TO TONY! TONI! TONé! -♪ IT FEELS GOOD, YEAH ♪

feels tony

↓

LOOK AT MY FUCKING FEET, MOTHERFUCKER!

feet fucking motherfucker

↓

-WHOO! AW, YEAH! -♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels whoo

↓

ARTHRISHA, WHAT DO YOU GOT?

↓

-CHECK THIS MOVE OUT. -♪ OH, IT FEELS GOOD ♪

check feels

↓

[ BELCHES ] OH, HO!

belches

↓

I DON'T KNOW WHAT SONG THAT IS, BUT I FUCKING LOVE IT!

fucking fucking-love love song

↓

"FEELS GOOD."

feels

↓

-IT'S A FUCKING HIT SONG. -♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels fucking song

↓

TOPPED THE CHARTS, I THINK. HO, HO!

charts

↓

♪ OH, IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

[ ROOSTER CROWS ]

crows rooster

↓

HEY, THANKS FOR HELPING ME, RICK.

helping rick thanks

↓

YOU'RE A PRETTY GREAT GUY.

↓

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. FUCK YOU FOR SHOOTING MY LIVER.

fuck liver shooting

↓

I'LL SEE YOU AROUND.

↓

OH, MAN. WHAT -- WHAT HAPPENED?

happened

↓

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, MORTY.

morty worry

↓

LISTEN, IF YOU WANTED TO TRY TO GET A PIECE,

piece wanted

↓

YOU BETTER HURRY UP. NOW'S YOUR LAST CHANCE.

chance hurry nows

↓

HEY, HEY, ARTHRISHA, UM, MAYBE I COULD --

↓

UH, I HAVE A BOYFRIEND.

boyfriend

↓

-OKAY. -I'M NOT TRYING TO BE RUDE.

rude

↓

I JUST -- I DON'T WANT TO LEAD YOU ON.

lead

↓

I-I-I UNDERSTAND.

↓

I MEAN, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HELPING END THE FESTIVAL,

festival helping

↓

BUT I HAVE A BOYFRIEND, AND, UH, HE'S JUST --

boyfriend

↓

OKAY, OKAY, YOU CAN STOP SAYING IT.

↓

I TOOK IT OKAY THE FIRST TIME,

↓

AND NOW YOU'RE JUST REPEATING STUFF.

repeating stuff

↓

-OH, I'M SORRY. -IT'S OKAY.

↓

OH, YOU'RE SO SWEET, I JUST -- OH, BUT I CAN'T.

sweet

↓

YEAH, YOU'RE STILL DOING IT.

↓

IT WON'T BE EASY CREATING A NEW SOCIETY FROM THE GROUND UP.

creating easy ground society

↓

WELL, A HELPFUL RULE MIGHT BE IF YOU NEED SOMETHING, YOU GET IT.

helpful might rule

↓

-PRETTY SIMPLE, RIGHT? -I NEED FOOD.

food simple

↓

-WHO'S GOT FOOD FOR THAT GUY? -I DO, BUT THIS IS FOR ME.

food

↓

CAN'T YOU MAKE SOME MORE?

↓

OH, SURE. AND WHILE I'M MAKING FOOD FOR EVERYONE,

food

↓

WHO TAKES CARE OF MY KIDS?

care kids takes takes-care

↓

I'LL TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS, IF I GET SOME EXTRA FOOD FOR IT.

care extra food kids

↓

EXTRA FOOD?

extra food

↓

WELL, I'M NOT GONNA DO EXTRA WORK IF WE ALL GET THE SAME.

extra

↓

ALL RIGHT, OKAY, FAIR IS FAIR.

fair

↓

IF YOU DO EXTRA WORK, YOU GET EXTRA FOOD.

extra food

↓

-OH. -[ ALL MURMURING ]

murmuring

↓

WHO'S GONNA KEEP TRACK

track

↓

OF WHO GETS HOW MUCH FOOD FOR HOW MUCH WORK?

food

↓

HELLO. I CAN DO THAT.

↓

I'LL KEEP TRACK OF EVERYONE'S FOOD,

everyones food track

↓

YOU KNOW, IN EXCHANGE FOR FOOD.

exchange food

↓

THAT'S NOT A REAL JOB!

real

↓

OH, AND MAKING FOOD IS?

food

↓

YOU SON OF A BITCH!

bitch

↓

EAT THIS!

↓

[ ALL SCREAMING ]

screaming

↓

GUYS, GUYS, GUYS, GUYS, WHOA, WHOA.

whoa

↓

COOL IT, NOW. TAKE IT EASY.

cool easy

↓

THERE'S TOO MUCH AGGRESSION HERE.

aggression

↓

WHAT IF WE DESIGNATE A PERIOD OF TIME

period

↓

DURING WHICH WE CAN ALL GET THIS HATE, MURDER,

hate murder

↓

AND RAGE OUT OF OUR SYSTEM --

rage system

↓

I CAN'T HELP BUT FEEL ASHAMED

ashamed

↓

ABOUT WHAT I DID BACK THERE, RICK.

rick

↓

I GUESS YOU WERE RIGHT. I'VE GOT A LOT OF REPRESSED STUFF

repressed stuff

↓

-I NEED TO DEAL WITH. -DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, MORTY.

deal morty worry

↓

REMEMBER THOSE CANDY BARS EARLIER

bars candy candy-bars remember

↓

-THAT WE GOT IN THE FIRST ACT? -YEAH, WHAT ABOUT THEM?

↓

TURNS OUT THEY HAVE A CHEMICAL IN THEM CALLED PURGENOL

called chemical turns

↓

THAT AMPLIFIES ALL YOUR VIOLENT TENDENCIES.

tendencies violent

↓

OH, BOY. WHEW! THANK GOODNESS FOR THAT, HUH?

goodness whew

↓

THAT'S A RELIEF.

relief

↓

YEP. DON'T EVEN SWEAT.

sweat

↓

YOU'RE STILL THE SAME OLD MORTY.

morty

↓

YOUR CHARACTER'S TOTALLY PROTECTED.

characters protected

↓

♪ IT FEELS GOOD ♪

feels

↓

♪♪

↓

Man: AND THERE'S THE APPROACH.

approach

↓

JERRY, WHAT IS "TADDI MASON LLC,"

jerry

↓

AND WHY IS OUR PHONE BILL $700?

bill phone

↓

-UH... -HEY, ARE YOU BORED...

bored

↓

UH...

↓

...LONELY, JUST LOOKING FOR A FRIEND?

friend lonely looking

↓

-UH... -CALL ME, TADDI MASON.

↓

IT'S ONLY $1.99 A MINUTE TO TALK.

minute

↓

-UH... -SIGN UP TODAY,

sign today

↓

AND I'LL EVEN CALL YOU ON A REGULAR BASIS...

basis regular

↓

-UH... -...FOR JUST $1.99 A MINUTE.

minute

↓

THAT'S A STEAL BECAUSE I'M A GREAT PAL.

steal

↓

UH...

↓

WE COULD TALK ABOUT SPORTS OR BARBECUE.

barbecue sports

↓

[ GRUNTS ]

grunts

↓

JERRY, GET A JOB.

jerry