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Home » Malcolm in the Middle » S07E01 — Burning Man

Malcolm in the Middle

Season 7, Episode 1 — Burning Man

TMDB episode metadata
Show: Malcolm in the Middle
Episode title: Burning Man
Air date: September 30, 2005
Director: Peter Lauer
Top billed cast: Frankie Muniz, Jane Kaczmarek, Bryan Cranston, Justin Berfield, Erik Per Sullivan, Christopher Masterson
The family attends the counterculture Burning Man festival in the desert.
Source: TMDB
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Boys, cookies!
boyscookies
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- All right! - Nuh-uh, not that one.
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I put Dewey's antibiotics in that one.
antibioticsdeweys
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Take this one. It's biggest.
biggest
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Did you put anything in this one?
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Of course not. Just take it.
course
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Then take this one 20 minutes later.
minutes
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Yeah, but I really think Jamie...
jamie
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D-D-D-D-Dewey, what is the rule?
deweyrule
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This one RV is worth three of me.
threeworth
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Okay.
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Help me get this grate off.
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I'm gonna ditch out when we slow down for a turn.
ditchslow
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I am not going to Burning Man with Mom and Dad.
burning
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Reese, we're in the middle of the desert.
desertmiddlereese
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I know what you're thinking--
thinking
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the roadrunners are too smart to catch and eat.
catchsmart
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But the coyotes are idiots.
coyotesidiots
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Look, it might not be as embarrassing as we think.
embarrassingmight
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If we move quick, we might be able
ablemightquick
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to sneak off without anyone knowing
knowingsneak
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that we came to Burning Man with our parents.
burningparents
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We're here!
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Hey, neighbors!
neighbors
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I'm gonna do art, too.
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I brought my paintbrushes.
brought
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Okay, let's get moving here.
moving
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Reese, Malcolm, I want you guys...
malcolmreese
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They're gone.
gone
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They shimmied under the RV and took off running.
running
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Oh. Well, then I guess it's up to you
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to help me set up a protective perimeter around the camper.
camperperimeterprotective
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We'll need about 40 rocks, at least the size
leastrockssize
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of bowling balls.
ballsbowling
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I'm sorry, son. You snooze, you lose.
losesnooze
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Now, come on, come on, don't let the flies get in.
flies
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Look at this place-- it's amazing!
amazingplace
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That has to be the coolest guy on Earth!
coolestearth
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See? I told you everything was gonna be all right--
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even with Mom and Dad here.
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We just need to make sure we look out for each other...
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Whoa! Ow!
whoa
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Ow! Damn it!
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I stepped on a cactus. Can you give me a hand?
cactushandstepped
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Reese?
reese
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Hey, buddy?
buddy
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a928787e-0d51-4bd9-a5f3-26ca0ef4a997.gif
You know where the topless chicks are?
chicks
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And I'm not interested in the uggos or blimps,
interested
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if you know what I'm saying.
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Follow me, I'm going that way.
follow
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Hey, man, want some Stanley?
stanley
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- First time at Burning Man? - Yeah.
burning
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Yeah, I can always tell the newbies.
newbies
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Hey, you guys, you want a little Stanley?
stanley
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What's Stanley?
stanley
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Oh, Stanley was a buddy of mine.
buddystanley
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We've been coming to Burning Man together
burningcoming
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almost 20 years.
years
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Stanley!
stanley
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Anyway, he passed on
passed
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over the winter, and he always said
winter
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he wanted his ashes scattered here,
ashesscatteredwanted
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kind of as a way of spreading the spirit of Burning Man
burningspiritspreading
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to the people and the family he loved.
familyloved
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And you're allowed to do that?
allowed
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Spray a dead guy on people?!
deadspray
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I got suspended for a week
suspendedweek
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bac8c771-e6e2-4260-9f02-c93a8c6e1d8b.gif
for putting a mouse's head on the end of my pencil.
headpencilputting
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Burning Man's all about freedom, dude.
burningfreedommans
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You can do whatever you want here.
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Whatever I want?
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You mean, I could kick this over?
kick
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Or break that?
break
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Well, I guess if you really felt you had to.
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Doesn't that kind of take the fun out of mindless destruction?
destructionfunmindless
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That's what the flaming catapult's for.
catapultsflaming
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Yeah, but the real spirit
realspirit
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of Burning Man isn't about destruction.
burningdestruction
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It's about creating, participating, contributing.
creatingparticipating
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Building a community
buildingcommunity
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that needs you, relies on you.
needs
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It's about allowing yourself to become part of the whole,
allowingbecomepartwhole
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and then coming away from it with more than you brought.
broughtcoming
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No, there's no feeling like it in the world.
feelingworld
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- Wow. - Yeah,
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it's a mind-altering journey, son...
alteringjourneymind
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if you're willing to take it.
willing
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You know what? I think I want some Stanley.
stanley
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Wow! This stuff is gorgeous.
gorgeousstuff
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We really have to get some for the house.
house
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Howdy!
howdy
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fbb0f2aa-a08c-42ea-8504-5b50a3a68a60.gif
Just getting the old homestead set up.
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e2a703dd-909c-45fa-a952-7d98eecb6965.gif
Best hamburgers and dogs
bestdogshamburgers
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you've ever tasted are on me
tasted
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cfaf512d-b240-41f0-a944-1189e45923fa.gif
when I get this baby fired up, huh?
babyfired
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What's he doing?
↓
9e26ee22-f96b-4e6b-b37c-49383dd78420.gif
It's performance art.
performance
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61e6271e-2a82-41a4-89ea-122f34e9e12a.gif
He's skewering the empty banality
empty
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e3571284-ed04-44bf-a3d0-91f34ad7c4c3.gif
of the modern suburban dad.
modernsuburban
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78a17619-e341-4d08-a18d-c7c3bc6acf2f.gif
Honey, where'd I put my good basting brush?
brushhoneywhered
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Honey?
honey
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c058bf7e-f50e-470a-888c-6a79cbab90a8.gif
Honey?
honey
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217d19b6-d687-47a3-b0ac-422c1c9dfb32.gif
This guy's good.
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No one told me there was a looky-loo convention in town.
conventiontown
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af4012a6-3374-4827-b1e9-0d8bf47d8ee1.gif
Dad, do I have to circle the whole thing?
circlewhole
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I can't find any more rocks.
rocks
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Son, look, we might be in the desert,
desertmight
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but we are still civilized people,
civilized
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and civilized people put up arbitrary boundaries
arbitraryboundariescivilized
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that they will fight to the death to protect.
deathfightprotect
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I'm pretty sure we passed some nice-sized rocks when we turned into the camp.
camppassedrockssizedturned
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That's half a mile away!
halfmile
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Don't be silly. Two miles, easy.
easymilessilly
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Here we go!
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f05d9750-8aa2-480b-a000-85bc83cfa641.gif
Whoop-dee-doo!
whoop
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Hal, this place is so great!
place
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901aff3b-ba3f-4080-92d9-f80e6133d50e.gif
I met the nicest group of gals down by the Porta-Potty.
galsgroupnicestportapotty
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They call themselves a "tribe,"
tribe
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994fc982-5daf-4238-a891-0d316dadc81f.gif
like a group of wild Indians.
groupindianswild
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4017edc2-1078-40d4-85b6-8cbe3bf9efb6.gif
Isn't that cute?
cute
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They invited me to the hemp-braiding tent later.
hempinvitedtent
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What are you using the Porta-Potties for
portausing
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when we have the world's
worlds
↓
34fdbbcc-7c22-458f-bb14-3972879bbf1f.gif
greatest toilet ten feet away in the RV?
feetgreatesttoilet
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That thing will suck down a small deer.
deersuck
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Mention free food
foodfreefree-foodmention
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and they start gathering like flies.
fliesgatheringstart
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This is great-- I'm gonna spend my entire two days
daysentirespend
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at Burning Man standing in this line.
burninglinestanding
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Hey, man.
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77ab003f-630a-4235-814c-b048a2531dd5.gif
You know, the line's much shorter
linesshorter
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in front of the Shaman's tent.
fronttent
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The what?
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Oh, you will love her.
love
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She totally cured my planter's warts.
curedwarts
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- Thanks, but... - Come on, man.
thanks
↓
f78ea14d-77fb-47be-806e-960a8ddefcd6.gif
You think I'd lead you wrong?
lead
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And remember, if you're gonna eat glass,
glassremember
↓
9c97b759-b337-4503-a973-5fdd20661163.gif
chew at least ten times before you swallow. Okay?
chewleastswallowtimes
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Ooh, what do we have here?
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I stepped on a cactus.
cactusstepped
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The needle went right through my shoe.
needleshoe
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d1e0199c-795d-4920-8a4c-90f3efd05126.gif
Let's take a look.
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3cabb849-3c6e-4925-9951-6b487fb7d0ed.gif
It's not a big deal.
deal
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I think I just need some disinfectant
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6aaa728c-3b85-40a6-bd16-1d73f2297f45.gif
and a Band-Aid and I'll be...
band
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962a82a0-32aa-42ea-a095-acd7f043f086.gif
Ma'am?
maam
↓
fa991c02-eea3-400d-b497-5d035315ae4a.gif
Mmm. You've internalized
↓
3068b401-c1ea-4088-a5c8-510220885c8e.gif
a lot of criticism, haven't you?
criticism
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c2fd10d6-ad6b-4e1a-85a3-455fefcdd0ee.gif
Well, I don't know. I guess.
↓
9adc481e-9d71-4a82-8f8e-c91ab46f783d.gif
But what does...
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92563402-5cde-4f26-85e8-f9ffd6775fae.gif
Okay... here's your problem.
problem
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00cf7e95-fdfe-4a9c-a79f-22cc70c2d5a4.gif
You have an incredible amount of passion in your soul,
amountincrediblepassionsoul
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44194645-f41f-42b5-b81a-ad5d97783ace.gif
but you've got to let down the armor you're using to shield it.
armorshieldusing
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bd232ed7-2660-4502-b20c-2020ce505817.gif
You also need a tetanus shot.
shot
↓
ed2ffa29-7cfc-4e00-995e-a00cdb3c6424.gif
Okay, she's almost as old as my mom
↓
9028429b-9c04-4f6c-97d2-3360132ca1ed.gif
and obviously crazy as a loon.
crazyobviously
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d40df7ad-a05a-4956-9e94-f77c7146c83e.gif
So why am I so turned on?
turned
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3abaf98b-81da-4de8-a626-c022e3cbc82e.gif
Most Western medicines numb the body.
bodynumbwestern
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102bc88a-968f-4741-8730-193812024b19.gif
They silence it.
silence
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5a92305b-a33e-4862-b9f8-532db6265567.gif
But the body's an amazing thing, Malcolm--
amazingbodysmalcolm
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32e3f543-a220-426b-822e-56923061206d.gif
it can tell you what's wrong with it.
↓
2fc9fac0-e13f-4394-9f8f-c812eca76045.gif
All real healing is just listening.
healinglisteningreal
↓
460dfb1f-1af9-44a3-9905-397addc6cf94.gif
I don't see anything alternative about that.
alternative
↓
57f4bdc6-64f3-43c1-8cef-aa76e075259a.gif
I just don't see colonizing space as the answer.
answerspace
↓
3ea84266-55ca-4a10-bbc6-6f54828411c7.gif
I mean, if we can't solve our problems here,
problemssolve
↓
7a35a6aa-077f-4485-9ac0-62def9adeb6b.gif
what's the point of just exporting them there?
point
↓
e6fd4807-eda4-4c77-846e-48bbcfcc03d9.gif
Even Werner Von Braun said that everything science taught him
sciencetaught
↓
3d35b91e-feff-46e8-857e-a6f672fa19fd.gif
strengthened his belief in the continuity
belief
↓
3235615c-6a8b-43a0-9bcd-bd57bb1cb6ea.gif
of spiritual existence after death.
deathexistencespiritual
↓
05877c4c-29b5-424e-bfcb-d01274b14bab.gif
Okay, I buy that Godzilla came out of the collective purging
collectivegodzilla
↓
0421590c-bbe0-45ce-b520-3f664c09c50d.gif
of Japanese guilt after World War II,
guiltjapaneseworld
↓
f2d38b14-9a52-47a4-9cae-f77a0d566f2c.gif
but can you explain to me why the costume had to look so fake?
costumeexplainfake
↓
21931f4e-9aba-4fa8-b49d-71fa6d257173.gif
Well, let's see...
↓
a71294fb-733c-4ed3-a967-4de8b8ec183a.gif
first I'd say...
↓
85364dec-d895-4378-8c10-bbbf03bb6ad2.gif
the Go-Go's,
↓
4d102943-997f-43ca-b6c7-54c9b3904533.gif
then The Bangles...
↓
b0586b7d-dd8e-45e9-a0bd-722c9228e5d1.gif
Bananarama and Josie and the Pussycats.
↓
d0fd795a-ffb4-428b-ae68-d2263d62fe48.gif
I can't believe it! I hated Charlotte's Web, too!
believehated
↓
4a88eb99-5439-4bcc-89a9-1bbf98c5f9f6.gif
I just wanted to squash that whiny little spider.
spidersquashwantedwhiny
↓
708383d0-cff1-49c9-acfa-fa805abe920b.gif
Deep dish.
deepdish
↓
628e1d12-4086-450b-9182-f0813df8af22.gif
Chocolate chip.
chipchocolatechocolate-chip
↓
351bd797-bce8-4366-9e9a-c329c853b6d1.gif
- Oscar the Grouch. - Oscar the Grouch.
oscar
↓
fe3a207f-f4ae-4f42-9376-29effd3d7f8a.gif
Wow. And I thought all that crap
↓
7acccefc-578b-464c-a0c3-8c8de641fb52.gif
everyone said about love was just to piss me off.
lovepiss
↓
79707558-9410-4fd2-9538-cee2798380e8.gif
So you're going to come?
↓
58b0230b-a85d-4789-be4a-12885ead9404.gif
Oh, absolutely.
absolutely
↓
f02f7fac-c08c-4ed2-a2ac-65593b2bd2c8.gif
That sounds like a hoot and a half.
halfhootsounds
↓
4e835fc1-7c6a-4fb9-805a-b25afdfd9a2c.gif
Great. It's by the giant foam tongue.
foamgianttongue
↓
87c5979b-309c-42af-b124-f1a6a7e12383.gif
Just make a left at the guy in the phone booth full of Jell-O.
boothfulljellleftphone
↓
72008c3a-2d6a-4cad-a788-67313e7ae8f8.gif
If you hit the Men's Diaper Brigade, you've gone too far.
brigadediapergonemens
↓
886edfb6-ccb5-4ad0-ba93-2355f3ee4d20.gif
- See you there. - Okay.
↓
9dbfe7e8-f50f-4ed6-b90a-9d1c83f0b173.gif
What's this?
↓
4ca1e240-1046-4a0e-bf0a-0c5269af4bfb.gif
The food's all green.
foodsgreen
↓
df4bd7ba-a248-486e-b035-f6aa3eeee7f7.gif
I added a little food color.
addedcolorfood
↓
2c6eb550-1c00-4380-a576-e50689e3a83a.gif
It's artistic.
artistic
↓
b373f460-308c-42a5-92f7-119244019a51.gif
I'm being artistic.
artistic
↓
21f55f83-8e3c-4d46-86be-9ccc2745a63e.gif
Mom's right.
moms
↓
bc73f8f6-6268-4dc1-8bf8-082886af0b57.gif
I always thought art was just stupid paintings
paintingsstupid
↓
40ce3cb6-dda0-4109-9e78-0f8e213ea338.gif
of old dead guys in drag,
deaddrag
↓
08dc5768-3b00-4855-9293-47d21767f093.gif
but I was wrong.
↓
2dcc045b-1c71-497f-bf27-92e3f2cda8e8.gif
Art can be doing something, or even undoing something.
↓
9b67a877-2b81-4c9f-8af9-5aba7dbbfec3.gif
Like when I blew up the Muller's mailbox--
blewmailbox
↓
d8044968-31f6-4318-9b4c-b9d952ba418c.gif
that was art, and I didn't even know it.
↓
84e00781-5d36-4551-9680-0ca99b3d5e83.gif
Green eggs and toast.
eggsgreentoast
↓
89022adc-161c-4a6a-9635-66c31255a45e.gif
I do not like green eggs and toast.
eggsgreentoast
↓
c5c9de8f-3d27-4810-af8e-b022d81fad5a.gif
Oh, for God's sake, Hal, stretch a little.
godsgods-sakesakestretch
↓
b828aead-5520-4be7-ae4e-81516dcb0bba.gif
We're on vacation.
vacation
↓
0976de2d-2ee2-4a7a-858f-8827dfe98a8b.gif
Vacation?!
vacation
↓
c8cff78b-fb64-40f0-a77c-c8cc11ea0ab2.gif
Which part of this is vacation?
partvacation
↓
abe839ff-e378-49d7-b43b-a5ec761c5ca5.gif
Armor-Alling the tires
armortires
↓
a89cab7d-65f7-46dd-a3d1-97ba60c108ee.gif
for six hours, or scraping the dead bugs
bugsdeadhoursscraping
↓
0a476c7d-42e7-4a9f-91b8-a1db87ea1daa.gif
out of the grill with a toothbrush?
grilltoothbrush
↓
415619e5-a467-4468-bade-38b7d7e34e95.gif
Why do they have to play Frisbee so close to the RV?
closefrisbee
↓
2b51cd0a-dcbb-4785-bac3-c8661b10150a.gif
Can't they have fun with that thing
fun
↓
e6404e23-83f4-4b64-af43-deb86882d14d.gif
without constantly throwing it around?
constantlythrowing
↓
6f06c24c-6fb5-48d5-a236-f6bd61cfcf90.gif
And where's Malcolm? Did he even come home last night?
homemalcolmnight
↓
7bb77a9b-8376-4346-8794-73920e217258.gif
I gotta tell you, Lois,
lois
↓
5f9810d9-3695-41a9-a88d-a7ecd2daab43.gif
I really don't think I like this place.
place
↓
1356c4c7-2076-4933-8093-aef0f2ec925f.gif
I think I love this place.
loveplace
↓
3ad9a885-929c-4690-9c93-6648549ae663.gif
No, I'm sure I do.
↓
cd04dd12-f6c4-4e67-b86c-91c3793ae6a0.gif
Good morning.
morning
↓
dde4d7aa-8dd2-4151-b00f-77ed673512da.gif
Did you know...
↓
9cd4b5a0-0991-4ebe-ac90-24b0bf260f29.gif
you are the most incredible woman who ever lived?
incrediblelivedwoman
↓
20beb609-f9e2-47e8-b9dc-f5a3060c8254.gif
Well, I knew I was in the top three,
three
↓
b1958982-7661-4e58-9437-bc3338f35c63.gif
but I guess your vote clinches it.
vote
↓
67c30b49-150f-4b8a-8910-20a6d8b024d0.gif
So, are we going to spend the day together?
spend
↓
97ecf836-61da-4dac-9826-628839396714.gif
I thought we could go check out the Circle of Infinity...
checkcircle
↓
5d7e12b7-a8a6-4527-8026-9a793cd351b8.gif
Oh, I have a ton of re-birthing ceremonies to do today.
birthingtoday
↓
e8cd74e6-a9b5-4c73-bcbf-383deaea4f93.gif
But we can get together later. How about that?
↓
932565c5-0081-4fec-9792-e8624d018b53.gif
Sure, that sounds great.
sounds
↓
73648ea6-1f4f-4faf-b035-4c4a4a8328b0.gif
What's the matter?
matter
↓
d308f157-4f43-43a3-a3f7-7124a3cb6eb9.gif
Nothing.
↓
80f70437-8449-45f8-bcc9-22088013b9a0.gif
I'm happy.
happy
↓
67c3aea3-d15b-48b8-bb4a-b36eafb22af8.gif
- Really, really happy. - No,
happy
↓
31a8b34f-4f05-44cc-8f37-aabae6050e3c.gif
there's something the matter, but I just can't pin it down.
matter
↓
ef4d99bb-b182-4f43-a578-8ae9ec2869b7.gif
Nothing's wrong.
nothings
↓
5474d01a-a3f9-4d0a-9311-a99ddfe90ca3.gif
You go do your re-birthing whatevers,
birthingwhatevers
↓
594007bf-7a17-4319-849e-ec66233621d4.gif
and we'll get together later.
↓
eb179dc3-4662-4ca3-a277-739c1712b96b.gif
- Contempt. That's it. - What are you talking about?
contempt
↓
28192c3d-8f1f-4d9f-b7da-017ff9c6dbf5.gif
You have contempt for me and for what I do.
contempt
↓
4af1945a-c37c-4cb9-96b1-367a69f7b2ac.gif
No, no, not at all.
↓
8d00fc47-d64c-40ad-b255-7e7e2d0421de.gif
I should really just keep my mouth shut
mouth
↓
ee964b77-a51c-45d3-85f1-d1a8452ab402.gif
for the next five seconds.
fivefive-secondsseconds
↓
1aa3bc38-3775-49b7-9d2b-dcfcea9c2003.gif
Four, three...
fourfour-threethree
↓
4002251a-5a5e-4942-a8a7-98f5546663ed.gif
I mean, it is a pretty silly ritual,
ritualsilly
↓
eee506db-c841-434e-ac18-c2acedafccf6.gif
but I guess I don't see any real harm in it.
harmreal
↓
46b0f3de-bed3-4449-9c7c-255cd713c849.gif
You know, I have a lot to do today,
today
↓
896ff462-1841-44f8-85f6-bb1830cf4478.gif
and I think you should probably go.
↓
de330928-04bf-4b81-ad2a-a2e7d5ac5ed2.gif
- No... - Good-bye, Malcolm.
malcolm
↓
2d70d6ac-3fb7-438a-9f18-926d3e7c94c4.gif
This guy's really captured something here.
captured
↓
e58ff3c3-5ab8-4c4d-aa9e-0faf18a8f0d9.gif
This piece is as vicious as it is funny.
funnypiecevicious
↓
c8700577-6cb0-4986-a3a6-b6e000fb9c28.gif
What are you looking at?!
looking
↓
8d8e058b-ab2a-42fa-934f-7dd15f9a400c.gif
Haven't you ever seen a man
seen
↓
2941a756-a2fc-4558-91fa-b21562a4359a.gif
sweep his lawn with a broom before?
broomlawnsweep
↓
1e092fac-8701-4cfd-ab83-773ff0314967.gif
Okay, that's enough. I've had it.
↓
1e9e8452-cd3e-442c-a9b1-567798b2e344.gif
Go on, get out of here, you punks.
punks
↓
0b50983e-4c24-4846-b931-b005eeeee466.gif
What the hell is wrong with you people?!
↓
e933fe68-cff2-4039-9bdf-78e46195be9b.gif
Doesn't anybody have respect for personal property anymore?
anybodyanymorepersonalpropertyrespect
↓
f1e43776-4b15-434d-b452-8fe76071138c.gif
You can think about that for a few days
days
↓
6b976bc0-a7f0-45aa-b4c0-df21162f73aa.gif
until I give this back to you.
↓
c445ab14-a2e4-412f-b50f-907406d067d3.gif
No!
↓
77c352ec-0cdf-4cdc-a909-316ef14c56d4.gif
I bet orphanages don't take family trips...
familytrips
↓
b23b9f94-1eca-4aa3-9c2e-ae789200fe25.gif
or kids raised by animals.
animalskidsraised
↓
eed7bcdb-b963-4ee9-82b2-89a550bb96ad.gif
How come they get all the breaks?
breaks
↓
369ebe7b-51d2-417e-b439-5b75e160fa09.gif
Okay, Lois,
lois
↓
f4889770-8754-451d-978d-5221b46dc3f1.gif
you can open your eyes now.
eyesopen
↓
ed74bf42-b41e-4a8e-a805-897eb48fb9f9.gif
Oh, my gosh.
gosh
↓
127c8114-3417-4fe7-b4fd-18de7febf176.gif
This is fantastic.
fantastic
↓
ccc2ad46-0f37-49e6-903b-f0e2ad280ba8.gif
Oh...!
↓
fa829a66-8869-4a3a-ad81-58631aabe353.gif
I wish there was a JC Penney nearby.
nearbywish
↓
fcac2b96-8b34-4793-a34d-defa4a3c69d4.gif
I'd love to get wallets of this.
lovewallets
↓
3371a507-fab3-4485-b07d-a0c23b9fc87c.gif
Who's stupid idea was it to come here, anyway?
ideastupidstupid-idea
↓
509de5bf-b781-4c2e-b779-c944ec0dfb77.gif
I'm with you, Malcolm.
malcolm
↓
e2c3d39a-f83e-4bca-b648-a72e67c2bd55.gif
We don't belong here.
belong
↓
e7b35624-415d-4076-9c46-a90f38d07e58.gif
This place is full of freaks and weirdoes.
freaksfullplace
↓
99b538cf-b299-41ad-8f39-4440667118f8.gif
And now your mother and Jamie are out there with them,
jamiemother
↓
38e2e4f4-8e28-41c9-9863-a68148a3ba2d.gif
doing God knows what.
knows
↓
c9b51416-c1af-42e7-8313-5a0d44542081.gif
You're going to be okay, Malcolm,
malcolm
↓
132c88c7-b7a7-4d38-8dee-33c14f82350f.gif
because you are just like me.
↓
a2fb68a0-00d1-4857-aac8-a1366cd283b9.gif
- I am? - Well, sure.
↓
58761163-7e11-49b6-adea-86a76e6b31db.gif
They say we're stubborn, they say we're closed-minded,
closedclosed-mindedmindedstubborn
↓
6daa78a8-c845-45bc-bc5b-0114876d49af.gif
but I say there's nothing closed-minded
closedclosed-mindedminded
↓
a9b3a910-aaa2-4f70-b5e6-177d6ed0bf74.gif
about shunning ideas that make you scared and uncomfortable.
ideasscareduncomfortable
↓
8530c2b9-dd05-41f1-8334-8b99167274f7.gif
Yeah.
↓
5d81f635-e163-4977-92d0-517d888e2b51.gif
And who cares
cares
↓
8510e918-796a-48e0-a4f7-ba78d541a74e.gif
if they say we're afraid of life?
afraidlife
↓
10058552-4d39-46f2-a6e2-d139ac6c905b.gif
Life is scary.
lifescary
↓
f374db3b-203a-419d-a394-e4981e6b1848.gif
Life is
life
↓
c747cbbc-63e6-46f9-be12-c5d4db6c3091.gif
things eating things.
eating
↓
13832213-5359-4490-ab85-567b8245ce44.gif
I say let everyone out there go ahead and eat each other.
aheadgo-ahead
↓
014b1d41-6d78-4ed9-a515-8ee147129e0c.gif
You and I--
↓
a5e83e7f-1ced-40dc-a870-a3d97bff35e6.gif
we're gonna be in here
↓
3b53caf6-f01f-4aa0-9d67-ecf98a271b44.gif
together, safe and sound.
safesound
↓
50a66a88-4ead-4b67-b8d0-acbc055f02c2.gif
I've been a total idiot.
idiottotaltotal-idiot
↓
125780fc-205d-4b09-9ebb-97022cb659d3.gif
I have to get over myself.
↓
627fc767-1d7d-44d6-b3b2-7dabfe9fda76.gif
Where are you going?
↓
48b04bb0-e72c-4831-b260-9e1343475236.gif
Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you, young man!
walkyoung
↓
7b77372a-9417-480b-a1a7-113aa4f83b81.gif
Get... off... my... property!
property
↓
61a5dfc7-ea40-4df5-975f-2c932173c8f6.gif
What? What did I do?
↓
211f09ef-49b6-4a67-b1e4-e0c5ac03b9ac.gif
Come with us.
↓
e7362cfe-0382-4cad-862e-5779a9d02169.gif
Wait. I want my lawyer.
lawyer
↓
74c38335-f759-4762-8b5d-97a13d2f8d1a.gif
He's the naked guy in the buffalo head.
buffaloheadnaked
↓
2443d4d0-1aee-4412-a2c2-6bc26e1c3111.gif
It's okay, Reese, you're not in any trouble.
reesetrouble
↓
fa63e4d9-04ec-477a-b5e5-40794ade5100.gif
We want you to be the torchbearer
↓
f59a3404-82bf-48bb-b35c-08d6af578359.gif
for the big Burning Man ceremony.
burningceremony
↓
af39c2f4-87ee-467f-9bdc-40a691a99e66.gif
You do?
↓
17bb41e3-199f-4b06-8b15-82f4f1dc0e3f.gif
Absolutely.
absolutely
↓
cca5b3ab-ab58-414e-b5fc-262c54286e59.gif
I can't think of anyone who has embraced
embraced
↓
4736148a-406b-4bc9-97aa-2eac65f0db32.gif
and embodied the spirit of the festival more than you have.
festivalspirit
↓
62273504-8849-4ae1-93d3-211c32152794.gif
Really?
↓
1b54adb0-21a1-47ad-8354-344ecc685a91.gif
Wow.
↓
f344f69e-a1ba-4a10-b5b0-9f2c12529918.gif
Hey, don't say anything to my lawyer, okay?
lawyer
↓
0d3501e8-ac40-4314-8457-099cff4e2d71.gif
I don't want to have to give him a piece of this.
piece
↓
d7603144-04dd-4bcf-9462-77ae7ec62e88.gif
Open yourselves to the energy of re-birthing.
birthingenergyopenyourselves
↓
0c559da4-cdc6-4c7c-973e-9db5e356834e.gif
GROUP The old self dies.
diesgroupself
↓
d12bf0fb-9013-4135-a511-d30dd7ec9a24.gif
A new self is born.
bornself
↓
81cbd65c-9fd4-4ce6-8e5c-47be98654c32.gif
The old self dies.
diesself
↓
2a2ec904-2f57-4d3e-bfbb-7d49847edb74.gif
A new self is born.
bornself
↓
ff84f45d-a97f-4094-800d-6c91bdee98e1.gif
The old self dies.
diesself
↓
d268d0b8-3c2e-4b34-bf81-cc0aedf2c118.gif
A new self is born.
bornself
↓
4722407f-ac12-4e78-9f8d-961e4b698ab5.gif
I can do this.
↓
744a76a9-9f13-4bb9-b5f0-98c9c254ee20.gif
I can be open-minded.
mindedopenopen-minded
↓
bc18b419-b272-4e77-926d-a3cda14f4b7c.gif
So it's a little weird.
weird
↓
04496c95-fdbb-48db-a73f-7fd3abf842a7.gif
Most rituals are a little weird, right?
ritualsweird
↓
2e290517-a1a1-47fb-873d-8b985e48fb7b.gif
He really needs a fresh start.
freshneedsstart
↓
25f43c56-98df-4c51-a4ca-f3ecd142ae78.gif
He made a lot of mistakes his first two days.
daysmistakes
↓
525fabdd-2dd5-4803-8766-ee17dea946ee.gif
Okay, so it's totally insane.
insane
↓
6aa5768e-e4de-4186-9a7a-747f090e0375.gif
I don't care. I'm doing it.
care
↓
13ac2ac4-e8a0-445d-99ea-e093209d8aa6.gif
I got to tell you, man, you've been fantastic.
fantastic
↓
0144c9e7-f9f5-4426-b1e7-4540ea4386a0.gif
Thanks.
thanks
↓
2e7c8682-173a-46c3-a5c4-e6d5ec2e2f86.gif
- What's this for? - What's it for?
↓
d4a53317-eed2-4176-b053-a5357daf757e.gif
It's to set him on fire.
fire
↓
52757841-e0d1-41bc-93e7-9e4708592cdf.gif
Burning Man!
burning
↓
04224761-4214-4e08-ba6b-738936dc9639.gif
What?!
↓
ca0b98b8-ee24-42d2-bc76-d393afeb6d7a.gif
That's how we end Burning Man, man--
burning
↓
5901a0aa-545b-415c-a3fe-5a57a38b234e.gif
by burning the man.
burning
↓
fe751bcb-b9f7-4d32-98b9-f99f5f9472f0.gif
But it can't end. I don't want it to.
↓
8be2d844-cddf-4eab-a0f4-2985d323e3f1.gif
For the first time in my life, I feel real, like I belong.
belonglifereal
↓
d163ee78-ca1d-464b-bb6c-2b32a8b9ccb4.gif
We've all been there, man, but it still has to end.
↓
77489600-3266-4f8e-88fd-fb074f0ec843.gif
But why?
↓
53af24b6-051d-4cbb-9b5b-30742d2a53ab.gif
That's just the way it is.
↓
c9b14cd2-1125-41d6-9473-ef2b904392ce.gif
Look, it's cool if you don't want to...
cool
↓
09c53f86-f30b-4e93-80f5-59eb661fb9b3.gif
Get back!
↓
1af2e8eb-4f78-4260-9ddf-f5008b200820.gif
Everyone just stay back!
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No one's burning Burning Man!
burningones
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Burning Man!
burning
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Malcolm?
malcolm
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What are you doing here?
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I did it.
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I actually did it.
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You re-birthed yourself... for me?
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No. Well, yeah, originally, but something happened in there.
happenedoriginally
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I mean, I was able to open my mind
ablemindopen
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and be accepting of something I didn't believe in.
acceptingbelieve
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I've never been able to do that before.
able
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It's amazing; I actually feel like I've been reborn.
amazing
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It feels fantastic, and it's all thanks to you.
fantasticfeelsthanks
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Oh, Malcolm.
malcolm
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We can never see each other again.
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- What? - This can never work.
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You're just way too malleable.
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The condescending cynic I could deal with, but this...
condescendingdeal
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I don't want you doing things
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just because I want you to do them.
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Then I won't, if that's what you want.
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Crap.
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I'm sorry, Malcolm. Life is a journey
journeylifemalcolm
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that you have to take on your own.
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I've tried my own journey. It sucks.
journeysuckstried
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Please, please, please, just take me with you.
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I don't take up a lot of space.
space
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- You have to go now. - But...
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Great.
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Who knew this life could be even crappier
life
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than the last one?
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Burning Man! Burning Man!
burning
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No! Stay back! Stay back!
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I mean it!
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Get in the van, Reese. We're going home.
homereese
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Dad, you gotta help me.
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They want me to burn Burning Man.
burnburning
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Oh, for crying out loud,
cryingloud
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just torch the bastard and we're out of here.
bastardtorch
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I'm ready. I finally got your precious floor mats clean.
cleanfinallyfloorpreciousready
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Let's get the hell out of here.
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Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Are you insane?
insanewhoawhoa-whoawhoa-whoa-whoa
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You're not going into my beautiful van
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looking like that.
looking
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Hey!
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Here come the Trumpet Strumpets.
trumpet
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Let's burn the man!
burn
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Reese.
reese
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You behave yourself, young man. You hear me?
behaveyoung
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You look incredible, honey.
honeyincredible
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Now get in the van.
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No! No, please!
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Burning Man! Burning Man! Burning Man! Burning Man!
burning
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Please, no!
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No!
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No! Burning Man can't end!
burning
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I won't let it!
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Burning van! Burning van! Burning van! Burning van...!
burning
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I still can't believe how awesome Burning Man was.
awesomebelieveburning
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Next year we're totally going back, right?
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Totally.
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Okay, so Burning Man
burning
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didn't turn out as great as I thought it would.
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But I think I'll get over it a lot faster than Dad will.
faster
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His boss really loved that RV.
bossloved
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Don't wait up.
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I probably won't be home until dawn again.
dawnhome
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Tonight I'm digging him a new septic tank.
diggingseptictanktonight
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Come on, Dewey.
dewey
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First we gotta relocate the pet cemetery.
cemetery