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Home » Malcolm in the Middle » S02E04 — Dinner Out

Malcolm in the Middle

Season 2, Episode 4 — Dinner Out

TMDB episode metadata
Show: Malcolm in the Middle
Episode title: Dinner Out
Air date: November 15, 2000
Director: Jeff Melman
Top billed cast: Frankie Muniz, Jane Kaczmarek, Bryan Cranston, Justin Berfield, Erik Per Sullivan, Christopher Masterson
Shenanigans abound at the fancy spot where the family's dining with the Kenarbans, and at Francis' school, where rowdy teenage girls are partying.
Source: TMDB
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Bottom of the ninth. Two outs, man on first.
bottomninthouts
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The windup...
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The pitch...
pitch
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- Uh-oh. - Oh, man, we're so dead.
dead
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- That's it. Game over. - Yeah.
game
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- So I win. - What?
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Past the lamp is a home run. Two men scored.
homelamppastscored
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- That was a foul ball. - Are you crazy?
ballcrazyfoul
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It went right down the line.
line
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- It was foul. - Shut up.
foul
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You're home plate. You don't get a vote.
homeplatevote
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- And it was fair. - Do over.
fair
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Fine by me.
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Oh, crap!
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- Now we really have to quit. - Yeah.
quit
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- But that was a triple. - Get back up there.
triple
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♪ Yes, no, maybe ♪
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♪ I don't know ♪
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♪ Can you repeat the question? ♪
questionrepeat
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♪ Life is unfair ♪
lifeunfair
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I win...
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the gold.
gold
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Don't you have something with a little bit more violence in it?
violence
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Fishing... for Fishies.
fishing
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Sometimes...
sometimes
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he drowns.
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Boys! I've got snacks.
boyssnacks
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Hands.
hands
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Now, who wants applesauce?
wants
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I do.
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Stevie, there is no need to use your outdoor voice.
stevievoice
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And I've got some cinnamon if you guys are feeling a little crazy.
cinnamoncrazyfeeling
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Feeling... crazy?
crazyfeeling
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You'd better get going. You don't want to make her mad.
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She's always mad.
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Malcolm, I mean it! I have ice cream melting!
creammalcolmmelting
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- Here's your-- - Oh, no, no, no.
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Eat it in the car.
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Eat it in the car.
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- Oops. - Jerk.
jerkoops
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You looked.
looked
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Ow!
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below your waist,
waist
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you get to hit them in the arm.
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It's stupid, but, hey, you get to hit people.
stupid
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- Barn door's open. - Huh?
barndoorsdoors-openopen
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Ow!
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Boys.
boys
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- That sounds like fun. Good for you, dear. - She meant the whole family.
dearfamilyfunmeantsoundswholewhole-family
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Oh.
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Mom, I don't think that's a good idea. The Kenarbans are kind of...
ideakenarbans
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well, boring.
boring
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They're refined, Malcolm. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world
malcolmrefinedworldworst
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if their manners rubbed off on you boys.
boysmannersrubbed
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- You wouldn't get along with them. - Don't be silly.
alongsilly
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It's nice she's asking us out to dinner.
askingdinner
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It's been a long time since anyone invited us anywhere.
invited
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I wonder why that is.
wonder
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I think I see some hungry seals.
hungryseals
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Cadets...
cadets
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as you know, I don't often reveal my personal side,
oftenpersonalrevealside
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but after 20 years of separation,
years
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my mother has agreed to visit with me this weekend.
agreedmothervisitweekend
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She is a very demanding woman, and I haven't seen her for a long time.
demandingseenwoman
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I want things to go well.
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That means I will have no time for antics, shenanigans,
shenanigans
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hooliganism or tomfoolery.
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There will be no problems
problems
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which take me away from time with Mother.
mother
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This is important to me, which makes it...
makes
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- Important to us. - So it is crystal clear.
clearcrystalcrystal-clear
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I will not be disturbed this weekend.
disturbedweekend
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Yes, sir!
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As you were.
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- Whoa, he sounds pretty serious. - Yeah.
serioussoundswhoa
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- What time you want to start the party? - Huh?
partystart
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What are you talking about? Didn't you hear what Spangler just said?
spangler
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All I heard was he's gonna be too busy with his mother to pay us any attention.
attentionbusyheardmother
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What kind of party did you have in mind?
mindparty
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Oh, I don't know.
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I'm sure I can come up with something that we'll all find amusing.
amusing
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Well, howdy, girls.
girlshowdy
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I couldn't help but notice you all hanging out here by the fence
fencehangingnotice
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for the last six months.
months
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Would you like to come to a party tomorrow night?
nightpartytomorrowtomorrow-night
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You're gonna let us come inside?
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Well, sure,
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- that'd be the neighborly thing to do. - I would kill or die
killthatd
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to go to your party.
party
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Seriously, kill or die.
kill
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Well, that's the spirit. Okay, I'll take you
spirit
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and you and you
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and you--
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Wait a minute. Isn't this kind of degrading?
degradingminute
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Okay, not you
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and you and you...
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I wanna eat that one and that one.
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Oh, and those two.
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Isn't this nice?
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No pirate themes.
piratethemes
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No ball pits filled with screaming children.
ballchildrenfilledpitsscreaming
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Hal, look.
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"Please wait to be seated."
seated
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- Look, a dollar. - Oh, it's mine.
dollar
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Damn. I never fall for that amateur stuff.
amateurfallstuff
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Ow!
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Now, I am gonna say this once and only once.
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We are with respectable people tonight.
respectabletonight
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You are to be well-mannered and act civilized,
civilized
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or so help me, I'll wring your little necks, you hear me?
neckswring
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Here's the plan if we wanna ditch out of this thing.
ditchplan
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At the beginning, I'll say I might be coming down with some--
beginningcomingmight
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I don't wanna ditch out of this. I'm looking forward to it.
ditchforwardlookinglooking-forward
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The Kenarbans are nice people, and they wanna be friends with us.
friendskenarbans
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- So you're saying I'm on my own here. - Yoo-hoo, hi there.
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Hello.
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- Abe. - Hal.
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I think I might be coming down with something.
comingmight
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Sorry we're late. Some jackass parked in the handicapped space.
handicappedjackasslateparkedspace
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Oh! Huh...
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Why don't you guys get seated and I...
seated
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I gotta get something out of the car. I'll just be a...
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♪ I'd been married a long time ago ♪
married
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♪ Where did you come from? Where did you go? ♪
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♪ Where did you come from, Cotton-Eye Joe? ♪
cotton
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Why didn't we think of doing this sooner?
sooner
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Don't you think they're getting a little loud?
loud
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Spangler's only two buildings over.
buildingsspanglers
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Uh, ladies, this is all great,
ladies
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but if we could just take it down a teensy bit.
teensy
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Whoo! I marked him, y'all! He's mine!
markedwhooyall
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Now, remember, no throwing ice.
rememberthrowing
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No flicking butter at the ceiling.
butterceiling
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No sticking gum under the table
stickingtable
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and no eating gum already stuck under the table.
eatingstucktable
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Keep your voices down. You are warned.
voiceswarned
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You look very nice, Stevie.
stevie
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Oh, great.
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Who spilled?
spilled
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Ow.
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Circle game?
circlegame
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I wanna... play.
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I don't know, Stevie. It's-- It's pretty rough.
roughstevie
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Oh, come on, quit babying him. If he wants to play, let him play.
quitwants
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Now, remember, Stevie, don't look at this...
rememberstevie
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uh, or this.
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He's... good.
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Well, this is nice.
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I've been looking forward to this for a long time.
forwardlookinglooking-forward
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I don't know why we didn't do this sooner.
sooner
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- Do I feel flush? - No.
flush
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Would anyone like a drink before you order?
drinkorder
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- Oh, yeah. - He'll have a diet soda.
dietdiet-sodasoda
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And you, sir?
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What the heck, lemonade.
hecklemonade
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I'll have an iced tea.
iced
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- Sorry, we're out. - Oh, uh...
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- Well, then, I'll have a... - Wait a minute.
minute
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What's that guy having?
having
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- That's hot tea. - This is ridiculous.
ridiculous
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You have tea, you have ice. Make her some iced tea.
iced
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Oh, no, no, no, that is fine. I would love a hot tea.
love
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Wow.
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- This is really nice. - Yeah.
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Well, I have to use the restroom.
restroom
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I think I also need to use the restroom.
restroom
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Girls! You've got to be quiet! Please!
girlsquiet
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♪ You and me, baby Ain't nothin' but mammals ♪
aintbabymammalsnothin
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9b55106d-df9a-47e9-a282-2fae15c41586.gif
♪ So let's do it like they do On the Discovery Channel ♪
channeldiscovery
↓
d898578d-13ea-4adc-bbbc-8d4cb21a40ac.gif
Way to go, Francis.
francis
↓
c55ec210-9c39-485f-a3f5-3188991bd927.gif
Hey, I promised you girls. Not quality girls.
girlspromisedquality
↓
2b97972d-574a-4143-9466-35cc7ffc444f.gif
Well, gentlemen, I've had enough experience with debacles
experiencegentlemen
↓
28c637a3-b963-45c1-854f-8a3cbcb85590.gif
to know when to cut your losses.
losses
↓
80f8f075-dce5-498d-afef-08e91aabdceb.gif
- It's time to get Spangler. - No.
spangler
↓
ca6cdf1e-9a88-4493-a4bd-734dc3fefa13.gif
No, we're not wusses. We can handle this ourselves.
handle
↓
0dc136aa-ebb0-4cd2-b6f5-34b9cbe14d7b.gif
I'm gonna put a stop to this right now.
↓
13b74e44-4e72-49ec-af10-47517c9aed76.gif
All right, girls, party's over.
girlspartys
↓
d0aeadd9-561f-4485-994a-ed38ad94d870.gif
Help! Mama! Help!
mama
↓
0467776e-44d5-4625-871c-0314ccacbcc7.gif
They're seeing my underpants. Help!
seeingunderpants
↓
313e6762-9272-42fc-9776-e53cb8defcad.gif
Nice... one.
↓
df6a4d8b-9958-45ba-b194-578d25c16389.gif
Stevie, quit the game. You're just getting punched.
gamepunchedquitstevie
↓
1a12773e-a2c5-43c2-b77d-e8b6e929711a.gif
- You haven't gotten us once. - Oh, yeah?
gotten
↓
bca714f7-e065-4099-add9-fd1b1a140604.gif
Then how come...
↓
d37152b5-7ebe-4199-a4de-e062e886dc60.gif
you saw...
↓
3ea930be-27c1-4cbb-8044-698b9cda8131.gif
this?
↓
aceae470-064f-4c20-a552-30bd4a90286d.gif
Damn.
↓
78f99a6c-f281-4d70-be87-8a1a43607866.gif
I swear, Hal, you said, "I feel flushed"
flushedswear
↓
b661f28c-d154-494e-a380-998a3659f1fd.gif
five seconds before I was about to.
fivefive-secondsseconds
↓
1813a5e6-1473-4697-abff-d9656257267e.gif
- Oh, yeah? - Yeah.
↓
33c637f0-aa3e-438d-a0c2-34881b413a71.gif
Salud.
salud
↓
597a6c6d-6297-441d-a4df-0295c70f8c49.gif
Look at us now, two grown men having to sneak off from their wives
grownhavingsneakwives
↓
ab7a1c1a-bf84-4ff5-9c95-972431da9504.gif
just to have a drink.
drink
↓
b8c0135e-fa13-4b6d-9cf6-ae2e97afa834.gif
- How sad. - No, no, no.
↓
b80c2b7a-c8f6-4a39-8c74-1350bc36d99a.gif
It's really not like that with me and Kitty.
kitty
↓
ef335edf-0147-45c7-9884-e99c7f66498f.gif
Sure, I might let her think she's in charge,
chargemight
↓
ca81279c-c786-4fe1-ba1f-630afa7e34eb.gif
but when it comes down to the important stuff,
comesstuff
↓
22f942e8-54f2-478f-99a7-e55259a601dc.gif
Daddy rules the roost.
daddyrules
↓
cd3fe68c-3c79-4e7c-832f-b6a0678313ea.gif
Oh, hi, Kitty.
kitty
↓
a73d4a25-b8b3-4d1c-9114-047d6e8d6e90.gif
I got you!
↓
32a2024c-cef9-40ac-9570-1afafc5dca85.gif
I did.
↓
b6682585-2348-4910-afaf-6df0a8c4a39b.gif
Oh, yeah.
↓
26e07b56-e50c-44f7-a356-b32ba60d5118.gif
To being whipped.
whipped
↓
48afd59b-dcc2-409a-bdd5-281009ddd527.gif
Like butter, my friend.
butterfriend
↓
cca52515-5cea-4f8d-a4e3-80de64670faa.gif
Kitty.
kitty
↓
cf731390-0ead-4c14-b6a9-183d3290f169.gif
Where are those guys?
↓
10a24956-f41d-4df5-ac68-aa836bca788e.gif
Hal probably dragged Abe over to the bar.
dragged
↓
fd55a12c-bd68-4eef-8c3f-46b3ebf52c4e.gif
- If he's drunk, so help me-- - Oh, no, no, no. It's okay.
drunk
↓
d2f276bb-36e2-4267-b977-407be75735d0.gif
Gives us a chance to talk.
chancegives
↓
e83231bc-9580-4c8c-a60d-b3d914b8d827.gif
Here we are.
↓
389260e0-95ac-434e-b2a1-ea1b735e0429.gif
Diet soda...
dietdiet-sodasoda
↓
61aad6ae-9ade-41c3-96b1-6e492b00eb09.gif
lemonade...
lemonade
↓
a2ebaa32-9788-4cf8-a3b2-ceb85595cc36.gif
and cranberry juice.
cranberrycranberry-juicejuice
↓
91330aca-303b-4174-96ea-156a15ca24c8.gif
Thank you.
↓
6f3b3fbc-08d4-4414-b65b-affbd2a9c476.gif
Cranberry juice? After all that static he gave you about ordering tea,
cranberrycranberry-juicejuiceorderingstatic
↓
4d1b8d49-e7e5-4a03-8606-d571ef449e1f.gif
he gives you cranberry juice?
cranberrycranberry-juicegivesjuice
↓
ac06b0fe-651f-4471-879b-46fa114b0beb.gif
- Excuse me? - No, no, no, it's fine.
excuse
↓
dda68ca0-2a7b-4286-9704-d0e1e0fa1863.gif
- Something wrong? - Yes. Uh, my friend ordered tea,
friendordered
↓
e941bdf1-15f0-480e-bc65-503ceff1d95d.gif
and you've brought her cranberry juice.
broughtcranberrycranberry-juicejuice
↓
a7817007-4a7a-4c4b-85a4-aff0e481ef05.gif
I don't think so.
↓
7b3d26e9-2910-4795-bd71-4ec56e531566.gif
Instead of arguing with me,
arguing
↓
56787235-1165-4176-87ec-dcbb3a227ff4.gif
- just march back to the kitchen and make-- - No, no, no. I like cranberry juice.
cranberrycranberry-juicejuicekitchenmarch
↓
79c6c716-0958-4453-9af8-3d070909df23.gif
Very healthy for you. Mmm!
healthy
↓
c890f655-6f79-4769-a1bc-f7423dd11cb4.gif
Okay, Reese, that's enough! This isn't funny anymore.
anymorefunnyreese
↓
65c27007-613a-445c-bd92-8a80946015af.gif
Okay, okay.
↓
a12fd4e5-7049-47be-884b-e5cc6d2b1c82.gif
Man, look what your shoulders did to my knuckles.
knucklesshoulders
↓
c55a23b5-8f51-4c9d-9b08-e3fe1cc736bf.gif
I'll get you when I come back.
↓
7edf3c48-f10e-4b29-932b-61ef93f3f2d3.gif
I even knew...
↓
793fb5bc-91d3-4730-838d-9ff5f546df27.gif
he was going...
↓
512fc6a4-5d74-4dcc-8de0-cf678021faaf.gif
to do that.
↓
7df2c62b-6ac6-4e8d-8dde-d1c8bea7b55d.gif
She won't let me have butter on my bread.
breadbutter
↓
a28d642a-c36d-4951-b9e1-aa420bf92f3c.gif
Butter. I haven't eaten the stuff in ten years.
buttereatenstuffyears
↓
34120752-b504-4d69-a723-b28a00933805.gif
How'd this happen?
happenhowd
↓
9c1385e0-8f2f-46c0-a6cb-5aeb14b52cb4.gif
We weren't always this way.
↓
15ea11dd-76f3-47d3-9bad-6fa4422da1bc.gif
Actually, I was.
↓
d8b67cb7-59c8-4f05-b6cc-01189de96b01.gif
Classic story.
classicstory
↓
cb590c4b-f796-4bf8-a510-d4c4d6d7626f.gif
Raised by a grandmother and four spinster aunts.
auntsfourgrandmotherraisedspinster
↓
e9a59892-8b01-48c1-b388-b96a63c3bf96.gif
I used to wash their hair on Saturday nights.
hairnightssaturdayusedwash
↓
b6aa4f65-0712-4f41-96fc-1ee5dba6880a.gif
You poor bastard, you never had a chance.
bastardchancepoorpoor-bastard
↓
09915679-0d02-4c54-893c-1db81fe9b577.gif
Damn it.
↓
0dfa6877-09ed-4b52-a32e-b2c82129cb59.gif
Enough is enough!
↓
76a9e89e-14a5-4ba8-8567-d04da6585869.gif
You go, Abe!
↓
169bd735-0604-4c27-9c3d-7b37cb8881d0.gif
Go! Go! Go!
↓
a61c9dc3-1d16-41f5-bfe1-365f18c00294.gif
- Sir? - Go away!
↓
1e731359-b5b4-49a0-b008-66aaafad3c43.gif
I told you I did not wanna be disturbed.
disturbed
↓
db193fa6-760d-423a-a468-e7fdfd0f247a.gif
My aunt and I are...
aunt
↓
1738cb91-d415-4bdf-81b2-8e5a33463a2d.gif
catching up.
catching
↓
4eed1b5a-8cea-4786-b96e-28b326e93571.gif
I...
↓
957041dd-6049-4f3b-a05a-4ecec63519e7.gif
I thought you said it was your mother, sir.
mother
↓
da0635a5-8a34-4e25-b0ef-15fb4c55aea8.gif
Go away!
↓
e6c86e9e-7e9a-4975-857b-4266ed0ca326.gif
I wish I could, sir,
wish
↓
c66b863e-eb79-4e36-b347-d779c5d6fe1f.gif
but we have a bit of a situation.
situation
↓
fcfbc480-86fb-416e-bb29-9ee5041b2758.gif
See, we decided to have this party and it kind of got out of hand--
decidedhandparty
↓
f97bc4fe-38c3-401d-94ae-aa6c6073236e.gif
I don't care, cadet.
cadetcare
↓
88b595be-1532-4faa-89c6-ad76cbcde873.gif
- I will deal with it in the morning. - Yeah, but--
dealmorning
↓
ba5cd93c-d4d8-4c79-9688-ae414486583e.gif
In the morning!
morning
↓
01602ed5-b487-461c-9374-0f9c682125d9.gif
It's just that we invited some of the local girls...
girlsinvitedlocal
↓
d51b883f-22f5-48db-909d-a96dd7b86efc.gif
Local girls?
girlslocal
↓
bb1d6450-b643-4801-ae7a-645f750540b7.gif
There are local girls inside the perimeter?
girlslocalperimeter
↓
3613ee61-2092-4242-bb44-127c2c1e1aea.gif
- Have they killed anyone? - No, sir,
killed
↓
88753520-534e-4162-95f4-2748c255f7ec.gif
but I saw one of them eat a raw chicken whole.
chickenwhole
↓
b98c9ab2-bfb7-405f-8962-8d0043294275.gif
- Spangy... - Just a minute, Mother.
minutemother
↓
4897841f-2fd4-4930-905b-a72aa779c240.gif
Do you have any idea what you have done?
idea
↓
42d3273b-5f6c-4293-aa1b-8ff0da79690f.gif
Marlin Academy cannot exist
academycannotexistmarlinmarlin-academy
↓
5463d49c-5952-44cf-9feb-4a544f7f6025.gif
without the support, the goodwill and cooperation
cooperationsupport
↓
66d7ad8b-014a-4c59-b389-6a05d2d39d92.gif
of the local community.
communitylocal
↓
13d30e42-3629-474e-8f56-f7485de64ad4.gif
The police chief and the mayor both sit on our board of governors!
boardchiefmayorpolice
↓
b7d37785-01f1-4b20-a360-c736b690cb17.gif
The fire chief is a regent!
chieffire
↓
e8168902-ec99-4481-9cbc-a802ae67ce5a.gif
And right now their psychotic offspring are in there tearing up the floorboards!
psychotictearing
↓
ab259419-4ef0-4f47-9387-ca224b96ecff.gif
Oh, God.
↓
0ecc8512-2757-4aca-adc3-7f1e898ca72c.gif
It won't be long before they're in the air ducts.
ducts
↓
13818629-3f26-40ea-8c1d-ed380db4b16c.gif
What are we gonna do, sir?
↓
13422abd-b776-4fec-86a6-c08aa4ece5a3.gif
We are going to do what any self-respecting member of society does
memberrespectingselfsociety
↓
768dea5b-02dd-42c9-a280-d6cbd93a4fb9.gif
in a situation like this,
situation
↓
fdb6a60d-505c-4e54-9b74-2a3dbe67cb23.gif
- we're going to keep it quiet. - But they're destroying the school.
destroyingquietschool
↓
e3f6960c-5edf-49e3-a926-6586e425388b.gif
Let's hope that's all they do, cadet.
cadethope
↓
aa8ab8f0-c9da-4e25-80c4-837207582619.gif
I'm afraid this is like an oil fire, we have to let it burn itself out.
afraidburnfire
↓
cd4c966b-fce0-4fd6-9e3b-936c836aa1fc.gif
Oh, yeah, I forgot. One of them started an oil fire.
fireforgotstarted
↓
2262e00c-137b-49a3-9354-5eb0e93fb5d3.gif
So...
↓
241ff01a-d6a6-4f78-8193-6fdddf52b50c.gif
did you see any good movies lately?
latelymovies
↓
883b0d86-8006-4535-a9da-ab23d1cf58bf.gif
Well, we just saw Les Amants du Pont-Neuf. Did you see it?
↓
d41935b4-922a-4728-883e-f9a7b82d79be.gif
No.
↓
96edb411-38d6-48c7-819d-1777dab39277.gif
Last movie I saw was The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes on cable.
cablecomputermovieshoestenniswore
↓
53bb1f4d-79f1-46ee-9492-dc31d241cddc.gif
- Oh, my God! Kurt Russell! - Yes.
kurtkurt-russellrussell
↓
91145d44-6825-4108-9504-1a688268048a.gif
Oh, I had such a crush on him in those Disney films.
crushdisneyfilms
↓
31370e5c-afc7-4872-8569-55a348643315.gif
I did, too. Especially in Now You See It...
especially
↓
ddec5574-2bb1-40bc-8ab7-95457995af84.gif
Now You Don't!
↓
a461b9bf-c49e-4910-ac0d-260cc3f06e57.gif
- Oh, God. - Oh, he was so cute.
cute
↓
d04f4761-68ed-4dc0-b5c5-53732a736c69.gif
Did you see
↓
febacf93-7ae7-45fc-a587-54605156cbef.gif
- The Strongest Man in the World? - About 50 times.
strongesttimesworld
↓
03d866ba-4b68-4654-ad23-af92f7adea66.gif
- Oh, my God! - I wanted to reach out and grab that tush.
grabreachtushwanted
↓
dd9d5047-ed27-4bab-a505-54d0f670cf7a.gif
I am so terrible.
↓
26ce4cb6-9259-444b-a8dc-a55cd69ad781.gif
Seriously, this has got to stop.
↓
4569f642-66d5-4d5d-a491-9b06d6571f51.gif
I'm actually starting to feel bad.
starting
↓
69951452-bc1d-4756-9236-ac226bfd78a5.gif
And plus, I'm kind of getting bored creatively.
boredplus
↓
a8b81d31-90e1-402c-bc8b-83d4c4487474.gif
Oh, my God! Is that a snake?
snake
↓
d0b0f680-3be7-4d7e-ba3e-2b0ae82ca361.gif
Stevie, don't.
stevie
↓
7fecc64d-8f13-4c80-9a7f-a5c1a2a9b921.gif
Sucker.
sucker
↓
dbde8ff8-f2ce-4323-b079-f78cdc8223fb.gif
Snake...
snake
↓
72da7657-2e06-41f7-919f-79469e66c33e.gif
I'm an idiot.
idiot
↓
84d4cd76-1e46-45d7-9187-46f5de1399df.gif
I'm so glad
glad
↓
02034228-0a02-4309-9d86-1c52fffbf6a5.gif
- we decided to have this dinner. - So am I.
decideddinner
↓
4899c03c-5fd3-4df2-aed7-fbe8603e3995.gif
I feel so much better now.
↓
9eeaa698-edab-448b-8703-4c743716b818.gif
- Better? - About you and your family.
family
↓
3f82d496-90e4-44de-bfe4-fdc2c3738e83.gif
- What? - About Malcolm and Stevie
malcolmstevie
↓
49c62a8f-25a3-4811-acbf-50863a5d339f.gif
because they spend so much time together,
spend
↓
a1025854-fda1-4bfb-9be0-9616dadc9980.gif
and now we've gotten to know each other, I just feel better.
gotten
↓
064c6d90-6bc3-48b1-ab58-b7c06d099090.gif
Wait a minute. You mean this wasn't about you wanting to be friends?
friendsminutewanting
↓
7554da48-2f2b-492a-bbd7-45ebfb78404e.gif
Yes, it was.
↓
0c6f1fd3-7609-498d-9db7-efbc68a8431b.gif
No, it wasn't.
↓
664a48d8-6e75-44f2-8333-a7d8fc72f777.gif
You were checking us out.
checking
↓
e9f2b0b7-583d-4043-95e0-1faa98174339.gif
You wanted to see if we were good enough for your family.
familywanted
↓
f6ed000f-6afa-45a0-8fd5-9c24cd5571d8.gif
- No, no, no. I wouldn't put it that way. - I would,
↓
d749c6ae-ca24-4570-9083-4630aeb0e7a8.gif
because that's what you're doing.
↓
4e53611c-ea4a-48e2-b86e-597930c0797a.gif
How dare you?
dare
↓
2e5bdcd6-de36-4957-ac89-6c61d929b8b1.gif
You can't judge us.
judge
↓
47ad0781-3a32-46e1-a392-cbb1b8bd9ada.gif
You are not so perfect yourself, lady.
ladyperfect
↓
cd971d42-ea0a-4635-bbcd-e9bbb46d71bf.gif
Hell, you are one of the most uptight, repressed people I've ever met in my life.
liferepresseduptight
↓
dc0aea50-8bdf-4c26-9079-50c8f9d59f3a.gif
Did you know that Kurt Russell was the jungle boy on Gilligan's Island?
islandjunglekurtkurt-russellrussell
↓
4f21262c-a186-46bc-a7cf-0fb1621305ee.gif
Don't change the subject. We're having an argument here.
argumentchangehavingsubject
↓
6fa376fa-e03a-4b8a-ba4a-44525ce25170.gif
I yell at you, you yell at me. That's what you do. What's wrong with you?
yell
↓
f2948b4a-d4a1-476a-9d0e-64452ccab2af.gif
Whatever you say is wrong with me is what's wrong with me.
↓
cc5d823b-da96-4e6f-8be8-002a5e50df42.gif
There. Problem solved.
problemproblem-solvedsolved
↓
2996fcdd-2980-411c-9e9e-e0388d1073ee.gif
Ugh.
↓
8039b625-9099-42a4-a72b-83fbb55e02dc.gif
Okay, that's just freaky.
freaky
↓
305bafe9-63e1-4ea4-a23d-c022a0896cf7.gif
Hey, I'm getting good with my left. Thanks, Stevie.
leftsteviethanks
↓
f0fa1078-c1ef-436a-aff4-8fbaccb20477.gif
I... give up.
↓
e0cdeb56-8761-4e41-a7b0-06370d647a6a.gif
I'm going to...
↓
17131a22-0ced-404f-a59b-e17038fac1bf.gif
the car.
↓
ce4c6475-fad6-41de-854c-df50f2b7c865.gif
Way to go, Reese.
reese
↓
96d960d9-eb66-4e0e-b359-e049a2d650fe.gif
Aw, jeez.
jeez
↓
86adae90-d490-46e1-a00e-2219bccd71fc.gif
Crying on... command...
commandcrying
↓
2d94c7a8-f0f1-45b1-9650-d658487407f3.gif
got me... a cable modem.
cable
↓
6ceb16cf-8a81-48b1-8ad4-001a6d9ab151.gif
You have a real problem. Have you never yelled at anyone in your life?
lifeproblemrealreal-problemyelled
↓
45c69c5c-5cb5-4da6-b023-fd695f6e1d0b.gif
- I just don't see what it accomplishes. - Are you kidding?
kidding
↓
f41ac724-f2b2-49cd-89b9-15e981d5cf90.gif
Most of the time, if you're not yelling, they're not listening.
listeningyelling
↓
afe4b2f7-4385-48cd-8c49-2f1766565e1f.gif
Lois, our situation is difficult enough
difficultloissituation
↓
b90c4842-5c06-4237-a347-9e6c566563b6.gif
without me adding a bunch of negativity to it.
addingbunch
↓
1dc27c8b-762d-4cfa-b9ea-4cbfd2f3a3bd.gif
What situation? You mean Stevie?
situationstevie
↓
cc301f3e-fb7e-4a32-9e33-88884d70b4ac.gif
He's fine! He's not gonna wither away
↓
3d2b9be7-a477-484d-8c7d-65edbfb74408.gif
because you blow off steam every once in a while.
blowsteam
↓
5f8750ba-23c3-42e4-911a-bef20a288f28.gif
Hey, why don't you give both of you a break?
break
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Go ahead, hit me. Get it over with.
aheadgo-ahead
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Ow.
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Let me... help you.
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Reap...
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the whirlwind!
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Finally, justice.
finallyjustice
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I mean, if he doesn't kill him.
kill
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Stevie, what the hell do you think you're doing?
stevie
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You are in so much trouble! This behavior is totally unacceptable.
behaviortroubleunacceptable
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We are at a restaurant. What is wrong with you?
restaurant
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Don't you take that tone with me! You just wait till we get home!
hometilltone
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He bruised the bone.
bone
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Oh, like you didn't deserve it.
deserve
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- Good for you! I knew you had it in you. - Shut your trap!
trap
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Excuse me, would you mind please keeping it down?
excusekeepingmind
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Would you mind going to hell? And I absolutely did order tea!
absolutelymindorder
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How hard is it to remember a stupid drink order, you idiot?
drinkhardidiotorderrememberstupid
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- Kitty, there's gonna be some changes-- - And you!
changeskitty
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Mr. Ho Hos in his sock drawer!
drawersocksock-drawer
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- Who do you think you're kidding? - Honey, you have to pace yourself.
honeykiddingpace
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And another thing, Don Juan,
anotherjuan
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there are two people in that bed!
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You know, I really don't feel very good.
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I've had it with your poker nights and your idiot friend--
friendidiotnightspoker
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I think this is where they nested.
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I'd say we got off lucky.
lucky
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This happened once before in '72,
happened
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we had to bulldoze the amphitheater.
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It's Horton.
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Hey, Horton, you okay?
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What happened?
happened
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I've seen things, Francis.
francisseen
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Terrible things...
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And I think I'm engaged.
engaged
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Come on, children. Quickly.
childrenquickly
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Those pants went out of style in the '80s and were ugly then.
pantsstyleugly
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Don't you give me that look. You got a eye problem?
problem
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Whoa, interesting dinner.
dinnerinterestingwhoa
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Stevie beat the crap out of Reese,
beatreesestevie
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his dad got drunk,
drunk
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and his mom's gone totally psycho.
gonemomspsycho
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- Oh, my God. We're contagious. - He spent the whole night
contagiousnightspentwholewhole-night
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staring at the cocktail waitress!
cocktailstaringwaitress