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Home » South Park » S01E08 — Starvin' Marvin

South Park

Season 1, Episode 8 — Starvin' Marvin

TMDB episode metadata

Show: South Park

Episode title: Starvin' Marvin

Air date: November 19, 1997

Director: Trey Parker

Top billed cast: Trey Parker, Matt Stone, Isaac Hayes, Mary Kay Bergman, Jennifer Howell

The four boys are at Cartman's house watching the "Terrance & Philip Thanksgiving Special" on television. During a break from the show, a Sally Struthers commercial convinces the boys that the prospect of a free "Taiko" sport watch with a five-dollar donation is irresistible. Typical greedy American youth. So Stan dials in, using his mother's credit card number and makes their donation.

Source: TMDB

↓

Hidey ho, all you "South Park"-a-teers out there.

park south south-park

↓

Hidey ho!

↓

I'm rootin' tootin' Trey Parker.

parker rootin rootin-tootin tootin trey trey-parker

↓

And I'm pistol-slingin' Matt Stone.

matt matt-stone pistol stone

↓

And this here's old Scratch.

scratch

↓

Say hi, old fella.

fella

↓

Hi, Scratch.

scratch

↓

You know, Matt and I are right excited

excited matt

↓

about this next episode of "South Park,"

episode park south south-park

↓

because it's our favorite episode.

episode favorite favorite-episode

↓

That's right. It's called "Starvin' Marvin,"

called marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

and it originally aired on Thanksgiving.

aired originally thanksgiving

↓

In it, the boys celebrate the holiday

boys celebrate holiday

↓

with a visitor from a far-off land.

land visitor

↓

You know, when Comedy Central Called us and asked us

asked called central comedy

↓

to do a Thanksgiving special,

special thanksgiving thanksgiving-special

↓

the first thing that went through my mind was,

mind

↓

"Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."

jennifer

↓

Cup her perky breasts in my hands

breasts hands perky

↓

and put my hand back and kind of--

hand

↓

nice little tight buns there.

buns tight

↓

But you know, the thing about this episode

episode

↓

is that it teaches racial tolerance,

racial tolerance

↓

to treat everyone as an equal regardless

equal regardless treat

↓

of the color of their skin.

color skin

↓

Oh, look, it's our Indian friend,

friend indian

↓

Indian Companion. Say hi, kids.

companion indian indian-companion kids

↓

Hi!

↓

What's happenin', Indian Companion?

companion indian indian-companion

↓

Something coming. Grizzly bear.

bear coming

↓

Oh, well, why don't you go over there

↓

and kick him in the balls?

balls kick

↓

Grizzly bears like being kicked in the balls.

balls bears kicked

↓

Dumb ass. - He's so stupid.

dumb stupid

↓

Well, why don't you all sit back and have

↓

a rootin' tootin' good time with "Starvin' Marvin"?

marvin rootin rootin-tootin starvin starvin-marvin tootin

↓

Yee-ha!

↓

Hooray!

hooray

↓

♪ I'm going down to South Park ♪

park south south-park

↓

♪ Gonna have myself a time ♪

↓

♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪

faces friendly friendly-faces

↓

♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪

folks humble humble-folks temptation

↓

♪ Going down to South Park ♪

park south south-park

↓

♪ Gonna leave my woes behind ♪

behind woes woes-behind

↓

♪ Ample parking day or night ♪

ample ample-parking night parking

↓

♪ People spouting: "Howdy neighbor." ♪

howdy howdy-neighbor neighbor spouting spouting-howdy spouting-howdy-neighbor

↓

♪ Headed on up to South Park ♪

headed park south south-park

↓

♪ Gonna see if I can't unwind ♪

unwind

↓

♪ So come on down to South Park ♪

park south south-park

↓

♪ And meet some friends of mine ♪

friends meet

↓

That was awesome! - Yeah!

awesome

↓

Would you boys like some Cheesy Poofs?

boys cheesy cheesy-poofs poofs

↓

Get out of the way, mom!

↓

The "Terrance and Phillip" Thanksgiving Special is on.

phillip special terrance thanksgiving thanksgiving-special

↓

Sure, hon.

↓

And yeah, we want Cheesy Poofs!

cheesy cheesy-poofs poofs

↓

Hey, Terrance, looks like this might

might terrance

↓

be a good place to start a new colony.

place start

↓

It sure does, Phillip.

phillip

↓

No one will oppress our religion here.

oppress religion

↓

You stained my pilgrim hat, butt-pipe!

butt pilgrim pipe stained

↓

Did you guys see that? That was sweet.

sweet

↓

Coming up next on the "Terrance and Phillip"

coming phillip terrance

↓

Thanksgiving Special, Phillip farts on Terrance and laughs.

farts laughs phillip special terrance thanksgiving thanksgiving-special

↓

Oh, cool.

cool

↓

And now a word from our sponsor.

sponsor word

↓

Here in the heart of Africa, children are dying.

africa children dying heart

↓

Not from disease or war, but from hunger.

disease hunger

↓

I'm Sally Struthers.

sally sally-struthers struthers

↓

These children are in desperate need, and only you can help.

children desperate

↓

Hey, who's that fat chick?

chick

↓

Sally Struthers, dude. She used to be on "Full House."

full full-house house sally sally-struthers struthers used

↓

Oh.

↓

You see, here, in the middle of Africa,

africa middle

↓

food is extremely scarce.

extremely food

↓

Doesn't look like she's having

having

↓

any trouble finding food.

finding food trouble

↓

Yeah, she's fatter than Cartman.

cartman fatter

↓

Yeah. Hey!

↓

For just $5 a month, you can sponsor a child.

child month sponsor

↓

That's stupid, who the hell would want to do that?

stupid

↓

Sponsor now, and we'll also

sponsor

↓

send you this Teiko digital sports watch as a free gift.

digital free gift send sports sports-watch teiko watch

↓

Kick ass!

kick

↓

Sweet! - Whoo-hoo!

sweet whoo

↓

I'll call--I know my mom's credit card number.

card credit credit-card moms number

↓

Did they say if it's waterproof?

↓

Hello? Is this Sally Struthers?

sally sally-struthers struthers

↓

Oh. - What did she say?

↓

Shut up butt-pirate, I'm trying to hear.

butt pirate

↓

Ass-rammer. - Yeah? Yeah.

↓

We want to adopt a starving Ether-nopian.

adopt starving

↓

When do we get the sports watch?

sports sports-watch watch

↓

Just a second fat-ass! - You vas-deferens!

second

↓

Hello? No, no, it's a ma--

↓

Vas-deferens?

↓

Oh.

↓

Ask her if we get the watch right away.

watch

↓

Do we get the sports watch right away?

sports sports-watch watch

↓

- She says we do. - Cool.

cool

↓

I get to wear it first, you guys.

wear

↓

I can't wait to get out of school

school

↓

and get our Teiko sports watch.

sports sports-watch teiko watch

↓

Yeah, but I get to wear it first, I said.

wear

↓

Children, children! To honor this special time

children children-children honor special

↓

of year, we'll be doing a canned food drive.

canned canned-food drive food food-drive

↓

Does anybody know what a canned food drive is?

anybody canned canned-food drive food food-drive

↓

Yes, Eric?

eric

↓

When they cut up a chick's stomach

chicks stomach

↓

to get a baby out?

baby

↓

No, that's a Caesarian Section, Eric, but that's okay,

eric section

↓

remember, there are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

questions remember stupid

↓

A canned food drive is when we collect canned food

canned canned-food collect drive food food-drive

↓

for poor people who can't afford to eat on Thanksgiving.

afford poor thanksgiving

↓

You mean, like Kenny? - Exactly.

kenny

↓

Mr. Garrison?

garrison

↓

Why do poor people always smell like sour milk?

milk poor smell sour

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I don't know, Eric, they just do.

eric

↓

Now, children, I want each of you to bring

bring children

↓

in one can of food.

food

↓

And later, the mayor of South Park will

mayor park south south-park

↓

divide it up amongst Kenny's family and other poor people.

amongst divide family kennys kennys-family poor

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I'm not bringing in food for poor people, screw them!

bringing food poor screw

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Don't you want to help those who are less fortunate?

fortunate less

↓

Hey you guys, do you hear something?

↓

I--I think I hear the flower children calling!

calling children flower

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This is the one time of year

↓

you're supposed to care about people who can't eat!

care supposed

↓

Isn't it enough that I pay taxes?

taxes

↓

What about the poor houses that I pay for?

houses poor

↓

Many would rather die than go to those places!

places

↓

Well then, perhaps they should,

perhaps

↓

and decrease the surplus population!

population

↓

Okay, kids, that's enough Dickens for one day.

dickens kids

↓

Let's get on with our lesson, right, Mr. Hat?

lesson

↓

That's right, Mr. Garrison,

garrison

↓

Englebert Humperdink was the first person

person

↓

on the moon. Who was the second?

moon second

↓

Aaaah!

aaaah

↓

What the hell is going on? - Aaaah!

aaaah

↓

Well, you don't see that every day.

↓

Okay, now, once we have all the canned foods collected,

canned collected foods

↓

we'll need some clever way to distribute them to the poor.

clever distribute poor

↓

It should be something festive.

festive

↓

Mayor, we've got a very big problem.

mayor problem

↓

Ah, you're that insane genetic engineer

engineer genetic insane

↓

from up on the hill, right?

hill

↓

Yes, and I may have made a horrible mistake.

horrible mistake

↓

I was trying to genetically engineer

engineer genetically

↓

turkeys for Thanksgiving.

thanksgiving turkeys

↓

Uh-huh.

↓

You know, to provide food for the needy.

food needy provide

↓

Of course.

course

↓

Well, something went wrong and the turkeys broke free.

broke free turkeys

↓

And the worst part is, they're really pissed off.

part pissed worst worst-part

↓

Naturally. Oh, do go on.

naturally

↓

We have to stop them or--or they could destroy everything.

destroy

↓

Time is short.

short

↓

You were saying?

↓

They act just like normal turkeys, except they're evil.

evil except normal turkeys

↓

Oh, my!

↓

Somehow I don't think you're taking me seriously.

↓

Now why would you say that?

↓

Did it come? Did it come? Is it here yet?

↓

I get to use it first, you guys!

↓

Mom, did our digital sports watch come yet?

digital sports sports-watch watch

↓

Not yet, hon.

↓

Damn. - Hey, look, you guys.

↓

And now, back to Part 2 of the "Terrance and Phillip"

part phillip terrance

↓

Thanksgiving Special.

special thanksgiving thanksgiving-special

↓

I sure am cold, Phillip.

cold phillip

↓

Yes, and hungry too.

hungry

↓

Being a pilgrim totally sucks ass.

pilgrim sucks

↓

Gosh, I hope we don't starve.

gosh hope starve

↓

Ah, a squeaker!

↓

The digital sports watch is here!

digital sports sports-watch watch

↓

What the hell?

↓

Dude, that's not a digital sports watch.

digital sports sports-watch watch

↓

Hey, it looks like one of those Ether-opians.

↓

Oh, man, they must have accidentally sent him

accidentally must sent

↓

instead of the sports watch.

sports sports-watch watch

↓

Maybe they took it literally when we said

↓

we wanted to adopt a kid.

adopt wanted

↓

Whoa! That was cool.

cool whoa

↓

Yeah, how did he make those clicking sounds?

clicking sounds

↓

What's your name dude? - Mabin.

name

↓

I think he said his name is Marvin.

marvin name

↓

Yeah, Starvin' Marvin.

marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

Nice to meet you, Starvin' Marvin.

marvin meet starvin starvin-marvin

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Hey, mom? - Yes, hon?

↓

We found a Ether-opian, can we keep him?

found

↓

Sure, hon. - Sweet.

sweet

↓

Dude, let's bring him to school tomorrow.

bring school school-tomorrow tomorrow

↓

Come on, Starvin' Marvin,

marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

I want you to meet my little brother.

brother meet

↓

No, no! He's my son! I adopted him.

adopted

↓

It was my mom's credit card.

card credit credit-card moms

↓

Okay, okay, we'll switch off.

switch

↓

Starvin' Marvin can stay here for a week,

marvin starvin starvin-marvin week

↓

then at Stan's, then with me.

stans

↓

Yeah, and never with Kenny, because his family is too poor.

family kenny poor

↓

Totally. - Ahh!

↓

Look how the leaves fall so delicately

fall leaves

↓

on the surface of the pond.

pond surface

↓

It's so beautiful.

↓

Not as beautiful as you.

↓

Oh, darling, look. Thanksgiving turkeys.

darling thanksgiving turkeys

↓

Oh, they're so beautiful. - Not as beautiful as you.

↓

Look at the way they foam at the mouth,

foam mouth

↓

like beautiful suds of beer. - Not as beautiful as-

beer

↓

This is a great way for you

↓

to experience America, Starvin' Marvin.

america experience marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

This is what we call an 'all you can eat buffet.

buffet

↓

Yeah, here you get to eat all you want for only $6.99.

↓

That's why we all come here on Tuesday nights,

nights tuesday

↓

except for Kenny's family, 'cause to them,

except family kennys kennys-family

↓

$6.99 is two years' income.

income years

↓

Why is your family poor, Starvin' Marvin?

family marvin poor starvin starvin-marvin

↓

Is your dad an alcoholic too?

alcoholic

↓

You see, Starvin' Marvin,

marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

these are what we call appetizers.

↓

Ap-ee-tizer.

↓

This is what you eat before you eat,

↓

to make you more hungry.

hungry

↓

Well, food is here, that's it for the appetizers.

food

↓

No, Starvin' Marvin, that's my pot-pie.

marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

Cartman, you butt-pipe, this is the time of year you're

butt cartman pipe

↓

supposed to share. - Oh yeah, you're right.

share supposed

↓

Are you gonna eat all of your peach cobbler?

cobbler peach

↓

No, you don't want all that. Why don't you share it with me?

share

↓

Just shove it on over here.

shove

↓

Let me just have some of that, huh?

↓

Children, children!

children children-children

↓

I'm a little disappointed in your Thanksgiving spirit.

disappointed spirit thanksgiving

↓

Only a few cans have been

cans

↓

donated to our canned food drive.

canned canned-food donated drive food food-drive

↓

And can't we do a little better than

↓

creamed corn...

corn creamed creamed-corn

↓

creamed corn... and...creamed corn?

corn creamed creamed-corn

↓

Please bring in more diverse food, children, or else

bring children diverse food

↓

Kenny's family is going to have a pretty corny Thanksgiving.

corny family kennys kennys-family thanksgiving

↓

Corny. Gravy.

corny gravy

↓

Corny Thanksgiving, hoo!

corny thanksgiving

↓

Anyway, children, I understand a few of you have

children

↓

brought in something special for show-and-tell.

brought special

↓

Yeah, yeah, we do!

↓

All right, boys, show us what you've brought.

boys brought

↓

This is our new Ether-nopian, Starvin' Marvin.

marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

He can do really cool stuff with his voice.

cool cool-stuff stuff voice

↓

Show 'em, Starvin' Marvin.

marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

No, Starvin' Marvin, that's Kenny's creamed corn.

corn creamed creamed-corn kennys marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

No, Starvin' Marvin, that's a bad Starvin' Marvin!

marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

Boys, what the hell are you doing?

boys

↓

This is horribly, horribly wrong.

horribly

↓

How did you get this child?

child

↓

He was accidentally delivered to us

accidentally delivered

↓

instead of a sports watch.

sports sports-watch watch

↓

The sports watch from the commercial?

commercial sports sports-watch watch

↓

Yeah, that one. - I want a Starvin' Marvin.

marvin starvin starvin-marvin

↓

Me too. - Yes, I'll pay $50 for one.

↓

Boys, you're too young to take care of a child.

boys care child young

↓

I'm afraid I'm going to have to call

afraid

↓

the Red Cross and have him returned.

cross returned

↓

Ah, I told you we shouldn't have

↓

brought him to school dude.

brought school

↓

Okay, thank you very much.

↓

Yes, you can pick him up tonight. Bye now.

pick tonight

↓

Now, boys, I hope you've learned your lesson.

boys hope learned lesson

↓

No.

↓

You can't care for this child!

care child

↓

But I thought we were supposed

supposed

↓

to care on Thanksgiving.

care thanksgiving

↓

Yes, but you don't actually get

↓

involved with the child's lives.

childs involved lives

↓

You're supposed to just send money,

money send supposed

↓

and once in a while they write you a letter.

letter write

↓

You see, Marvin didn't grow up

grow marvin

↓

in a normal place like South Park.

normal park place south south-park

↓

So why can't he live here now?

live

↓

Because he can't! - Because why?

↓

Because eight year olds can't be parents!

eight olds parents

↓

Then you take care of him.

care

↓

I can't. I--Umm, I'm very busy.

busy

↓

I send my $5 a month, see?

month send

↓

This sucks, Starvin' Marvin is our friend.

friend marvin starvin starvin-marvin sucks

↓

Oh well, back to the poor country with you.

country poor

↓

You better watch what you say, Cartman!

cartman watch

↓

You might be poor and hungry some day.

hungry might poor

↓

Yeah, right.

↓

I knew that you were the only person

person

↓

who would listen to me, Chef.

chef

↓

Yeah, well, let's get it over with.

↓

This place gives me the Bubujeebies.

gives place

↓

Look here in my microscope. Tell me what you see.

↓

Uhh, I see an extreme close-up

close extreme

↓

of Vanessa Redgrave's private parts.

parts private vanessa

↓

Oh, whoops.

whoops

↓

Now tell me what you see.

↓

Well, I'm no biologist,

↓

but I'd say it looks like turkey DNA.

turkey

↓

Precisely, but look how rapidly it's dividing.

precisely rapidly

↓

What does it mean?

↓

Means the turkeys are growing at an exponential rate.

growing rate turkeys

↓

If we don't destroy them all, they'll take over the town.

destroy town

↓

Maybe the world. - Oh, fudge!

fudge world

↓

Uhh, let me see that Vanessa Redgrave thing again.

vanessa

↓

Sure.

↓

Hello there, little boy, we're looking for a starving

looking starving

↓

African child who was accidentally sent here instead

accidentally african child sent

↓

of a Teiko sports watch.

sports sports-watch teiko watch

↓

Hey, hey, what's going on?

↓

Hey, let go of me! Hey!

↓

Hey! I'll kick you in the nuts. Okay, man?

kick nuts

↓

Here's your sports watch, son, sorry for the mix-up.

sports sports-watch watch

↓

Hey! Hey, seriously!

↓

Hey, you're pissing me off!

pissing

↓

Sweet.

sweet

↓

So how does this thing work?

↓

Well mayor, it's based on the cash grab,

based cash grab mayor

↓

but instead of money, the cans of food

cans food money

↓

are blown around inside the capsule.

blown capsule

↓

The pov inside catches as many as he can to feed his family.

catches family feed

↓

Pov? - Poverty stricken citizen.

citizen poverty

↓

Oh-ho-ho, brilliant.

brilliant

↓

What the hell is this?

↓

I don't know, mayor,

mayor

↓

I don't think it's listed on the program.

listed program

↓

They're increasing in number, mayor.

increasing mayor number

↓

These are the vicious turkeys I warned you about.

turkeys vicious warned

↓

It's true mayor!

mayor

↓

Those turkeys just ripped apart my cafeteria!

apart cafeteria ripped turkeys

↓

Whoa!

whoa

↓

You won't get away with this, you bastards!

bastards

↓

Wow! Those are some pissed off turkeys!

pissed turkeys

↓

Okay, people, don't panic! Bring out the defense squad!

bring defense panic squad

↓

We need more than that!

↓

They'll only come back in increased numbers!

increased numbers

↓

Hey, Phillip, could you pass the beans?

beans pass phillip

↓

Beans? Uh oh, looks like we'll be

beans

↓

at war with these Indians soon.

indians

↓

Wait, wait, wait.

↓

Here it comes.

comes

↓

Aaaaah, I crapped in my pants!

aaaaah crapped pants

↓

Aaaah!

aaaah

↓

I think you got some spatter on Chief Running Wolf.

chief chief-running running wolf

↓

I spattered his face!

face

↓

Now he's a smelly Indian!

indian smelly

↓

We'll be back to part 14 of the "Terrance and Phillip"

part phillip terrance

↓

Thanksgiving Special, right after this.

special thanksgiving thanksgiving-special

↓

Hunger is an enemy that we all must fight.

enemy fight hunger must

↓

These children desperately need your support.

children desperately support

↓

Hey, somebody get me out of here!

somebody

↓

This sucks! So please,

sucks

↓

call and adopt a child today.

adopt child today

↓

I'm seriously getting pissed off over here!!

pissed

↓

You want some more Cheesy Poofs, hon?

cheesy cheesy-poofs poofs

↓

Ya, I won da Cheesy Poof.

cheesy cheesy-poof poof

↓

Okay. - Sweet.

sweet

↓

This is serious bull!

bull serious

↓

There has to be a Happy Burger around here somewhere.

burger happy happy-burger

↓

Excuse me, I am a lost little boy--Could you help me?

excuse lost

↓

Well, screw you too!

screw

↓

What the--Who the hell let all these flies in here?

flies

↓

Hasn't anybody ever heard of insect repellent?

anybody heard repellent

↓

All right, everyone, it's time to give out

↓

canned food to the poor.

canned canned-food food poor

↓

Hey, where's Cartman?

cartman

↓

I don't know. Do you know where he is, Marvin?

marvin

↓

Looks like we have the turkey problem under control.

control problem turkey

↓

It's time to embrace the spirit of giving

embrace giving spirit

↓

with the canned food grab.

canned canned-food food grab

↓

Come on, hurry up.

hurry

↓

Grab a lot son.

grab

↓

Happy happy Thanksgiving! Let 'er rip!

happy happy-happy happy-thanksgiving thanksgiving

↓

Come on, grab those cans, little boy!

cans grab

↓

- Come on, Kenny! - Come on, son!

kenny

↓

Now, let's see all the goodies you're going

goodies

↓

to take home to your family.

family home

↓

It looks like he got a-- a can of string beans!

beans string

↓

What the--

↓

Dude, the mutant turkeys are back!

mutant turkeys

↓

Okay people, move along,

along

↓

nothing to see here, you looky-loos.

↓

I tried to tell you, but you didn't listen.

tried

↓

Gather around everybody, and listen good.

everybody gather

↓

Go to your homes and arm your--

homes

↓

What the hell are you supposed to be anyway?

supposed

↓

That's not important right now.

↓

No! What the hell is this little thing supposed to be?

supposed

↓

It doesn't look like anything.

↓

Chef, the turkeys! - Oh, All right.

chef turkeys

↓

Listen up everybody, and listen good.

everybody

↓

Go to your homes

homes

↓

and arm yourselves with whatever you can.

yourselves

↓

We'll meet back here in 15 minutes. Hurry!

hurry meet minutes

↓

We are not going to let our Thanksgiving

thanksgiving

↓

be ruined by a bunch of turkeys.

bunch ruined turkeys

↓

You guys, seriously, I'm hungry.

hungry

↓

I have to eat.

↓

Ah, sweet! The Red Cross!

cross sweet

↓

I'll have fried chicken and a side of mashed potatoes please.

chicken fried fried-chicken mashed mashed-potatoes potatoes side

↓

Sorry, kid, but we're out of food.

food

↓

We ran out of funding.

funding

↓

What? - We just didn't get

↓

enough sponsors back home,

home sponsors

↓

so now we've got to pack it up.

pack

↓

But I'm not a starving Ethiopian!

starving

↓

I have to get back home too!

home

↓

Sorry dude, we just don't have any funds.

funds

↓

Here, have a Teiko sports watch.

sports sports-watch teiko watch

↓

Weak!

weak

↓

People, we all have to do our part against the evil turkeys.

evil part turkeys

↓

There's too many of them.

↓

Come on! Where is that Thanksgiving spirit?

spirit thanksgiving

↓

We can't stop them.

↓

Today, you fight for your city!

city fight today

↓

You fight for your honor!

fight honor

↓

These turkeys will continue to push until they

continue push turkeys

↓

have taken everything from us!

taken

↓

These fudged-up turkeys from the the crustaceous era

turkeys

↓

can take our lives,

lives

↓

but they can never take our freedom!

freedom

↓

Whoo! Yeah! Whoo!

whoo

↓

Here you go, turkeys!

turkeys

↓

Does my hair look okay?

hair

↓

Can't go on...

↓

need... appetizer...

appetizer

↓

I'm sorry, God! I'm sorry I mocked poor people.

mocked poor

↓

I'm sorry I wasn't more sensitive.

sensitive

↓

Please, please, God.

↓

My god has forsaken me.

↓

Huh, I wonder what's in here?

wonder

↓

Snacky Cakes! Mmmm!

cakes mmmm snacky

↓

Sally Struthers? - Who the hell are you?

sally sally-struthers struthers

↓

Give me that cake! - No, this is my cake!

cake

↓

No, Sally Struthers, you give me that cake!

cake sally sally-struthers struthers

↓

No! You can't have any!

↓

No, Sally Struthers, that's my cake!

cake sally sally-struthers struthers

↓

You guys, Sally Struthers is holding food from us!

food holding sally sally-struthers struthers

↓

Uh-oh.

↓

Ahhh!

ahhh

↓

Stay close, children.

children close

↓

Oh, my God, they've killed Kenny!

kenny killed killed-kenny

↓

You bastards!

bastards

↓

The last three are getting away, shoot 'em, Ned!

shoot three

↓

We did it! - My God, what have we done?

↓

We've saved Thanksgiving.

saved thanksgiving

↓

But all those poor turkeys, they're--they're all dead.

dead poor turkeys

↓

Every turkey dies, not every turkey truly lives.

dies lives truly turkey

↓

As horrible as they were,

horrible

↓

they--they felt like a part of me.

part

↓

Perhaps I shouldn't be toying with God's creations,

gods perhaps

↓

perhaps I should just-- - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

perhaps

↓

Excuse me sir, we're looking for a little

excuse looking

↓

starving Ethiopian boy who was accidentally delivered

accidentally delivered starving

↓

to South Park instead of a Teiko sports watch.

park south south-park sports sports-watch teiko watch

↓

Have you seen anyone fitting this description.

description fitting seen

↓

Oh, that could be a hundred kids in this town, mister.

hundred kids mister town

↓

There you are. Are you ready to go home now?

home ready

↓

Wow, it sucks he has to leave.

sucks

↓

Yeah, I like him a lot more than Cartman.

cartman

↓

You know, I think I've learned something today.

learned today

↓

It's really easy not to think of images on TV as real people.

easy images real

↓

But they are.

↓

That's why it's easy to ignore those commercials,

commercials easy ignore

↓

but, people on TV are just as real as you or I.

real

↓

Yeah.

↓

And that means that MacGyver is a real person too.

person real real-person

↓

We're terribly sorry about the mix-up, little boy.

terribly

↓

We'll get you back home immediately.

home immediately

↓

That's right you will, God damn it.

↓

Move it povs, I'm an American!

american

↓

Lord, on this day of thanks,

lord thanks

↓

we would like to extend our deepest gratitude for this

deepest extend gratitude

↓

incredible bounty of green beans

beans bounty green incredible

↓

you have bestowed upon us.

bestowed

↓

And though for some reason you found it necessary

found necessary reason

↓

to take our son from us, and though you for some reason

reason

↓

find pleasure in watching us suffer, still, we give thanks.

pleasure suffer thanks watching

↓

Amen. - Amen.

amen amen-amen

↓

Does anybody have a can opener?

anybody opener

↓

God Damn-it.