Home » It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia » S02E03 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Season 2, Episode 3 — Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare

- Dennis, stop acting like a child. - I don't wanna hear it, Dad.

#1

⇓

Deandra, move the pool table so you and your brother can lay some grout.

#2

⇓

- I am not laying grout. - You guys are being babies.

#3

⇓

We're being babies, Mac? Why don't you go work for your dad all day?

#4

⇓

- My dad's a meth dealer. - "Oh, no! My daddy's in prison!"

#5

⇓

"My daddy used to give hot shots to prostitutes. Feel sorry for me!"

#6

⇓

- I got the grout. - You're not even listening to us.

#7

⇓

- Are you really leaving? - Yes!

#8

⇓

- Later, bitches. - Yeah, have a good life now.

#9

⇓

All right, look. I know what you're doin'.

#10

⇓

I can play this game. Mac and me and Charlie can run the bar.

#11

⇓

- Great. Terrific. It's a good idea. - We got better things to do.

#12

⇓

Please. What are you two gonna do?

#13

⇓

Dee and I have a little something we like to call "goals", okay?

#14

⇓

We have aspirations outside of this bar.

#15

⇓

We got big dreams, Mac. We're gonna go follow 'em.

#16

⇓

You guys have nothing without this bar.

#17

⇓

Don't worry about us, Mac. We'll be just fine.

#18

⇓

DENNIS: So what are your dreams? DEE: Hmm?

#19

⇓

Your goals, what are your aspirations?

#20

⇓

- Were you serious about that? - Yeah! What are you doing?

#21

⇓

Signing us up for unemployment benefits.

#22

⇓

Unemployment? No.

#23

⇓

Dee, that's for deadbeats. Come on.

#24

⇓

We got a golden opportunity here. You know?

#25

⇓

We can do anything we want if we put our minds to it.

#26

⇓

Well, I could use this time to get my acting career off the ground.

#27

⇓

- And I fully support you. - You do?

#28

⇓

Absolute. Look, the old Dennis would have said,

#29

⇓

"Dee, your sad little acting ship sailed a decade ago. It's pathetic."

#30

⇓

But the new me says that it's not my place to kill your pipe dreams.

#31

⇓

- You should go for it. - Really?

#32

⇓

Yes! Come on. This is America! We're gonna go for it!

#33

⇓

We're gonna work hard! We're gonna reach for the stars!

#34

⇓

We're gonna become more successful than our parents.

#35

⇓

- We can shove it in their faces. - Make 'em eat shit!

#36

⇓

- Oh, look, we qualified. - Really? How much?

#37

⇓

- $400 a week. - $400.

#38

⇓

- It's more than we made at the bar. - I know.

#39

⇓

Okay, new plan.

#40

⇓

- We're gonna go on unemployment. - Yeah.

#41

⇓

- That's what it's there for, right? - In the meantime, we will focus...

#42

⇓

Work hard and keep our nose to the grindstone.

#43

⇓

Right?

#44

⇓

Absolutely.

#45

⇓

CHARLIE: Ready? One, two, three.

#46

⇓

(grunting)

#47

⇓

- God damn it! - Why can you not lift your end?

#48

⇓

I don't know, dude. Let me figure out what is happening.

#49

⇓

Are you lifting with your back?

#50

⇓

Of course I'm lifting with my back, Charlie, okay?

#51

⇓

But I think your end is just lighter

#52

⇓

cause the balls have rolled down to this end.

#53

⇓

No! You got to snap your back up and lift.

#54

⇓

I'm jerking my back up!

#55

⇓

- What do you want from me? - Hey, what's the ruckus?

#56

⇓

I'm trying to conduct important business back there.

#57

⇓

We finished with the tile, and we're trying to move the pool table back.

#58

⇓

All right, all right, all right. Have you done the urinal?

#59

⇓

Because the urinal, you flush it, and it sprays all over the place.

#60

⇓

- Yeah, I know. I know. - Look, bro.

#61

⇓

You got to stop bossing us around, okay?

#62

⇓

I mean, look at Charlie. You're breaking his spirit.

#63

⇓

Look at me. I'm broken, dude. Look, I'm...

#64

⇓

You guys need a father figure. And I'm trying to be that father figure,

#65

⇓

and someday you're gonna thank me for it.

#66

⇓

And that's all there is to it. Trust me. Trust me on that one.

#67

⇓

You're gonna thank me for it. (door closes)

#68

⇓

I don't want a father figure.

#69

⇓

BOTH: #Oh, baby, you You got what I need

#70

⇓

#But you say he's just a friend But you say he's just a friend

#71

⇓

#Oh, baby, you#

#72

⇓

Come down just a little bit. He's not hitting it that high, you know?

#73

⇓

- #Oh, baby, you# - Now you split the difference.

#74

⇓

- You got to split the difference. - Yeah, split the difference.

#75

⇓

What the hell is this?

#76

⇓

Living the dream, bro. Living the dream.

#77

⇓

I thought you two were out looking for careers or something.

#78

⇓

We are, man. We're just getting a little bit of assistance

#79

⇓

to help us out over the hump.

#80

⇓

And this unemployment thing is so great,

#81

⇓

because we've made really big plans.

#82

⇓

- I'm gonna be a veterinarian. - Yeah.

#83

⇓

And I am gonna move to New York, and I'm gonna be on Broadway.

#84

⇓

What? It's 1:00 in the afternoon, and you're piss-ass drunk.

#85

⇓

Well, you know, it's a slow process, man. It takes a little time.

#86

⇓

- But we trust the system. - Is that a new watch, dude?

#87

⇓

- It is. It's awesome. - Oh, and I got a Jesus chain.

#88

⇓

- It's good. Look at it. - All right, look, guys.

#89

⇓

We want you to come back to the bar, okay?

#90

⇓

- Why in the hell would we do that? - You're not even listening to me.

#91

⇓

- Did you see my Jesus chain? - I'm busting my ass in that bar,

#92

⇓

and you guys are sitting on the stoop getting drunk all day long?

#93

⇓

(mock crying) What, this again? What, this again?

#94

⇓

- I have to work! - Cry for me. Cry for me.

#95

⇓

I don't know how to take advantage of government programs.

#96

⇓

Unemployment runs out, all right?

#97

⇓

And once it does, you guys are gonna be back out on your asses.

#98

⇓

Once it runs out, we're gonna go on welfare, dude.

#99

⇓

- Welfare? - Mmm-hmm.

#100

⇓

- You guys can't go on welfare. - Oh, really?

#101

⇓

It's reserved for people who need it, you know?

#102

⇓

Like poor people who need some help...

#103

⇓

(stereo plays) It's set up...

#104

⇓

- To continue... - #Oh, baby, you#

#105

⇓

It's not for over privileged pieces of shit

#106

⇓

who want to waste millions of dollars in tax...

#107

⇓

You want to play this game? We gonna play this game now?

#108

⇓

- #But you say he's just a friend# - God damn you!

#109

⇓

- #Oh, baby, you# - God damn it!

#110

⇓

#Got what I need#

#111

⇓

Charlie, sign here, here and here.

#112

⇓

So, you're giving me all your money.

#113

⇓

Charlie, for the 500th time, I'm not giving it to you. It's not yours.

#114

⇓

I'm just setting up a temporary account in your name.

#115

⇓

What my wife can't find, she can't get.

#116

⇓

Right. This is good. This is shady, Frank. I like this kind of stuff.

#117

⇓

But you will be handsomely rewarded

#118

⇓

f you just keep your hands off this money.

#119

⇓

Right, right. So what's the vig?

#120

⇓

- The vig? - Yeah, man.

#121

⇓

You know, what's... What's the vig on this action here?

#122

⇓

Do you even know what vig means?

#123

⇓

Hey-oh! What's up, bitches?

#124

⇓

Get your gloves. I got a lot of grout work for you to do.

#125

⇓

Forget the grout.

#126

⇓

I have been doing a little research that will change our lives forever.

#127

⇓

Turns out there's a little program called Work for Welfare,

#128

⇓

n which businesses hire potential welfare recipients,

#129

⇓

the government subsidizes their wage,

#130

⇓

and the IRS affords thousands of dollars in tax relief.

#131

⇓

Oh, I don't know what you're saying. Dude, is that a question?

#132

⇓

I don't understand. What's going on?

#133

⇓

Don't you get it? We will never need Dennis and Dee again.

#134

⇓

We hire a couple people, pay them nothing,

#135

⇓

and get them to do all of our work for us!

#136

⇓

- We just pay them nothing? - We pay them nothing!

#137

⇓

- That's incredible. - It's incredible!

#138

⇓

- What do you think, Frank? - If we do something like this,

#139

⇓

we got to make sure we don't abuse anybody.

#140

⇓

No. Oh, my God! I know what it's like to grow up poor, you know.

#141

⇓

We got to treat people with respect.

#142

⇓

Respect is the name of the game. Respect is number one!

#143

⇓

- The name of almost every game. - Absolutely.

#144

⇓

Because we understand the plight of the worker.

#145

⇓

- The plight! - Respect.

#146

⇓

Respect the plight.

#147

⇓

What do you think, Frank?

#148

⇓

I'm good. Go get us some slaves.

#149

⇓

(phone ringing)

#150

⇓

CHARLIE: No, dude. That's not what I'm saying.

#151

⇓

All I'm saying is that "slaves" is not a racist term.

#152

⇓

Look, dude, I'm... Okay, look.

#153

⇓

I'm saying over the history of time, right?

#154

⇓

There have been slaves of many different races.

#155

⇓

There's been Jewish slaves. I mean, uh, Italian, uh...

#156

⇓

I recognize that, Charlie. But in this country,

#157

⇓

we have to understand that it is a sensitive issue, okay?

#158

⇓

- I understand that. - What about that one?

#159

⇓

He seems strong.

#160

⇓

- Look at those massive thighs. - Yeah, those are good thighs.

#161

⇓

Yeah, but you're gonna have a problem with work ethic.

#162

⇓

That's what I'm talking about. You can't be saying things like that.

#163

⇓

No, dude. I'm not saying that because he's black.

#164

⇓

He's asleep in his chair. You know, like what...

#165

⇓

(sighs)

#166

⇓

- What about that one? - Don't do that.

#167

⇓

I knew you were gonna do that. 'Cause, why are you going to him?

#168

⇓

That's like reverse affirmative action, dude.

#169

⇓

You don't want to do that.

#170

⇓

You could cheat yourself out of a good slave here, man.

#171

⇓

Well, how do you know he's not gonna be a good slave?

#172

⇓

Come on.

#173

⇓

- Look at that. - This is complicated and confusing.

#174

⇓

And, like, I don't even understand.

#175

⇓

We got to talk to someone. Let's just talk to someone.

#176

⇓

Hello. Hi. We are here to sign up for the Work for Welfare Program.

#177

⇓

Yeah, my associate and I were just out on the floor.

#178

⇓

And we're looking for a suitable candidate, but...

#179

⇓

The problem is it's really tough to tell by eyeballing these people.

#180

⇓

So we were wondering, like, do you have, like, a Facebook?

#181

⇓

Or anything that we can go over, like physical stats?

#182

⇓

- And some kind of numbers... - Excuse me?

#183

⇓

Something to just expediate the whole process...

#184

⇓

It doesn't work that way.

#185

⇓

Why don't you read up on some of the program's stipulations?

#186

⇓

- Oh, that's big. - The Facebook?

#187

⇓

No, "Rules and Regulations". It's, uh, sort of a legal document.

#188

⇓

- Now, is there any way around this? - None whatsoever.

#189

⇓

- Okay. - All right, well...

#190

⇓

- Thank you for your time. - We got this, so we'll read it.

#191

⇓

Have a good one. I'm not reading that.

#192

⇓

- No, I'm not reading this either. - We'll get Frank to do it.

#193

⇓

Maybe get a slave to do it.

#194

⇓

- Oh, look what the cat dragged in. - Oh, well...

#195

⇓

I see you've decided to steal our welfare idea.

#196

⇓

- I can't say I'm surprised. - We're not stealing your idea.

#197

⇓

Let's all recognize that this is a little awkward situation

#198

⇓

between friends at the welfare store.

#199

⇓

- Let's go our separate ways, okay? - You guys can't get welfare!

#200

⇓

- Uh, yeah. We can. - No, you can't!

#201

⇓

They don't give it to any jackass that walks in here.

#202

⇓

It's reserved for people who need it, okay?

#203

⇓

- Drug addicts, mentally disabled... - Mac, we've got it covered. Dee?

#204

⇓

Your bicycle helmet.

#205

⇓

Later, boners.

#206

⇓

(sighs) - That's an awesome helmet. - What? Go! Out!

#207

⇓

Hello.

#208

⇓

Hi. Um, I'm a recovering crackhead.

#209

⇓

This is my retarded sister that I take care of.

#210

⇓

I'd like some welfare, please.

#211

⇓

You're a recovering crack addict?

#212

⇓

- Yep. - Mmm-hmm.

#213

⇓

And she's mentally retarded?

#214

⇓

Oh, most definitely.

#215

⇓

You have the proper medical paperwork?

#216

⇓

Medical paperwork?

#217

⇓

We're gonna need a physician's report

#218

⇓

to confirm your sister's mental illness,

#219

⇓

and your blood work to confirm your...

#220

⇓

... crack addiction.

#221

⇓

Well... Can't you see how retarded she is?

#222

⇓

(grunting)

#223

⇓

(sighs) Lose the helmet, sis. We can't prove that you're retarded.

#224

⇓

- I want that welfare, Dennis. - I know you do. So do I.

#225

⇓

You don't understand. I got a taste of my dream. I can't go back.

#226

⇓

I got to get to Broadway, and welfare's the key.

#227

⇓

- What do you wanna do? - Oh, they wanna play rough?

#228

⇓

We can play rough. Let's go buy some crack.

#229

⇓

(sirens wailing) (dog barking)

#230

⇓

Okay, thank you. We're all set. Friday, 3:00. Full blood work.

#231

⇓

- We'll just smoke a little bit. - A little bit.

#232

⇓

- Enough to get into our system. - And then we'll go to the doctor.

#233

⇓

We'll get all of our paperwork and we'll get full benefits.

#234

⇓

Then we'll collect for just a little while until we get settled.

#235

⇓

- And then I'll take the MCATs. - I'll move to New York. Perfect.

#236

⇓

(gasps) Oh, my God!

#237

⇓

- Oh, Jesus! - Oh, wow, you scared us.

#238

⇓

Oh, not 'cause you're black. No, no, no.

#239

⇓

- No, we're not racist. - No, no, no, no. God, no.

#240

⇓

- The neighborhood is scary. - If you were another ethnicity...

#241

⇓

- You really did pop up. - But it's a nice neighborhood.

#242

⇓

- It's the nature of this... - Roll your window down.

#243

⇓

Okay.

#244

⇓

- What you need? - Uh, one, please.

#245

⇓

- One what? - Uh, one rock of crack.

#246

⇓

A crack rock. Is that enough? Is one crack rock enough?

#247

⇓

How much would you recommend for a first-time user?

#248

⇓

Tell you what. I'll make you a deal.

#249

⇓

Two for the price of one.

#250

⇓

- Really? - Oh, that sounds good.

#251

⇓

- That's very nice of you. - How much?

#252

⇓

Uh, $200?

#253

⇓

- Okay. Uh-huh. - Sounds reasonable. Great.

#254

⇓

Okay. Let's see here, uh...

#255

⇓

That should be about 200. Thanks for being so kind.

#256

⇓

And patient.

#257

⇓

Pick it up down there.

#258

⇓

- Wait. Where? - Which...

#259

⇓

- This one. It's got to be that guy. - Don't say "this one".

#260

⇓

Maria, after you're done in the bathroom you come look for me,

#261

⇓

because I got some boots to be shined, all right?

#262

⇓

Tony, go chase that leak down in the basement, all right?

#263

⇓

Okay, boss. (exhales)

#264

⇓

Mac, I got to hand it to you. This is brilliant.

#265

⇓

That's how I roll. Charles?

#266

⇓

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna get nice and drunk,

#267

⇓

play some video games until my eyes bleed.

#268

⇓

- Amen to that, brother. - Me too. I wanna play Charlie.

#269

⇓

Uh... Don't you have, like, some stuff that you need to do?

#270

⇓

- No. - Yeah, managerial stuff.

#271

⇓

- Managerial stuff! - No, I got that all cleared up.

#272

⇓

And then I thought after we played a video game,

#273

⇓

the three of us go outside,

#274

⇓

throw the pigskin around, play some two-hand touch.

#275

⇓

- Hey, that's not gonna work out. - I'll teach you how to play.

#276

⇓

- Yeah, I already know how to play. - Not properly though.

#277

⇓

- Kind of properly. - Right. Oh, Charlie. You know what?

#278

⇓

We got to get into the bathroom to show Maria...

#279

⇓

Charlie has this thing, the scrubbing.

#280

⇓

Charlie has this scrubbing thing with the Brillo.

#281

⇓

- I have a Brillo. - He has a method.

#282

⇓

- And we got to show her. - Make sure that she's got it down.

#283

⇓

- I'll get myself a beer. - Yeah! Yeah, get a beer.

#284

⇓

We'll work it out over here.

#285

⇓

Well, this is a development I did not expect.

#286

⇓

It's like he's really trying to become our father.

#287

⇓

- I know how to play football. - I know you do, bro. I know you do.

#288

⇓

(sighs) Do you want me to leave?

#289

⇓

Huh? No, you're good. Make sure you really work the sponge in there.

#290

⇓

Because otherwise, that stain, like, it'll...

#291

⇓

- It's not clean if you don't. - Yeah. It's gonna get worse.

#292

⇓

Charlie, what are we gonna do? We got to ditch him or something.

#293

⇓

Tell you what. How about you and me, we go out on the town?

#294

⇓

You know what I mean? We celebrate this whole...

#295

⇓

(whispers) Slave situation.

#296

⇓

I'd love to, Charlie. I really would but we don't have any money.

#297

⇓

- What are we gonna do? - Oh, I got money.

#298

⇓

- What? - I got a whole bunch of money, bro.

#299

⇓

Frank's been hiding all of his money in my account.

#300

⇓

And why was I not made aware of this before?

#301

⇓

Uh, it's got something to do with the vig.

#302

⇓

What's a vig?

#303

⇓

Well, you know how gangsters, they talk about a vig?

#304

⇓

- Yeah? - And it means...

#305

⇓

- Yeah. Oh, a vig! - A vig.

#306

⇓

- Yeah. Well, you should have a vig. - I should have a vig, right?

#307

⇓

- And Frank didn't give me one. - It's bullshit! You deserve a vig.

#308

⇓

- I do. I'm a good guy, right? - You're a great guy.

#309

⇓

We're all great guys who deserve vigs. We're good people.

#310

⇓

All right, here's the plan. We're gonna slip out of here, okay?

#311

⇓

We're gonna hit an ATM. We'll take out just a little bit of cash.

#312

⇓

- Just a little. - Just enough. He won't even notice.

#313

⇓

Just enough to have a quiet night out.

#314

⇓

(whooping) Here's some for you! Here's some for you!

#315

⇓

And here's some for you! (laughs)

#316

⇓

(rooster crows) (alarm clock rings)

#317

⇓

Oh, God.

#318

⇓

Oh, shit!

#319

⇓

Dennis!

#320

⇓

- Dennis! - What happened?

#321

⇓

It's 4:00. (shudders)

#322

⇓

I'm freezing and I'm sweating all at once.

#323

⇓

I think I may have peed in my pants.

#324

⇓

We missed our doctor's appointment.

#325

⇓

Well, only by an hour. If we hurry, maybe they'll still see us.

#326

⇓

It was yesterday. We missed our appointment by an hour and a day.

#327

⇓

We slept through a whole day?

#328

⇓

- I feel awful. - I feel like I'm gonna die!

#329

⇓

I don't wanna feel like this anymore, Deandra.

#330

⇓

Mmm-mmm. Me either. Okay, listen.

#331

⇓

Maybe if I make a phone call right now,

#332

⇓

we'll be able to make another appointment.

#333

⇓

You think he'll see us on such short notice?

#334

⇓

We have got to try.

#335

⇓

Hey, man. Thanks for seeing us on such short notice.

#336

⇓

- That's what I do, baby. - Two more, please.

#337

⇓

That guy. Yeah.

#338

⇓

No, these are old, and I need to get new head shots.

#339

⇓

Because you can't have an agent without head shots.

#340

⇓

Dennis, when you become a veterinarian,

#341

⇓

will you buy me some new head shots? Please? Dennis?

#342

⇓

- Hey! Dennis! Hey, Dennis. - Huh. What?

#343

⇓

When you become a veterinarian, will you buy me head shots, please?

#344

⇓

Hey! Hey, get out of here, you piece of shit! (dog barking)

#345

⇓

Yeah, I'll buy you stuff.

#346

⇓

I'll buy you lots of things. (exhales)

#347

⇓

I'm definitely gonna buy a bunch of crack.

#348

⇓

(all laughing)

#349

⇓

- Hey! Hey, that's Dennis and Dee! - Driver, pull over!

#350

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Hey, Dennis! Dee!

#351

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- Oh. - Hey.

#352

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- Guys. Hey. - Hey. Hey.

#353

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- Hey, how's it going? - Oh, yeah. It's gonna...

#354

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We're putting a couple things together lately.

#355

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- Hey, uh, are you guys holding? - Holding what?

#356

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Holding... Do you have any money?

#357

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- Please? - Oh, um...

#358

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- I just need a little bit of money. - Charlie, wait!

#359

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DEE: Charlie, wait! DENNIS: No!

#360

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Driver, we're done here. (all laughing)

#361

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That's enough whining, for crying out loud!

#362

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I think it might be broken.

#363

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I told you not to act like such a nancy boy out there.

#364

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Something was bound to happen.

#365

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I didn't think it was full-contact.

#366

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How do you expect to become a better player if nobody pushes you?

#367

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Maria, go get us some ice and three beers.

#368

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- I don't drink. - Me neither.

#369

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You don't drink? Jesus Christ! You two are a couple of downers.

#370

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You work hard, you don't drink. How'd you end up on welfare?

#371

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It's a vicious cycle, Mr. Frank.

#372

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I mean, one cannot support a family on a minimum-wage...

#373

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(cell phone rings) Oh, shh-shh-shh-shh!

#374

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Y'ello?

#375

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This is Pam from First National Bank. Charlie Kelly, please.

#376

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- Yeah, this is Charlie Kelly. - Hi. I'd like to speak with you

#377

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about some recent activity on your new account.

#378

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Some recent activity on my new account?

#379

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- We got a big problem here, buddy. - All right. Try it again.

#380

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I've tried it three times, okay? It's just not working.

#381

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Need I remind you that the services have already been rendered, Charlie.

#382

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- We got to pay these girls. - He cut us off.

#383

⇓

- Is there a problem? - No.

#384

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- Not a problem here. - Yeah, I'm calling Hector.

#385

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- No, no. Don't call Hector. - I'm calling Wallace.

#386

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We shouldn't be calling Hector or Wallace or any other large pimp.

#387

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Charlie and I are gonna handle this situation

#388

⇓

just like we handle every situation. - Yeah, we are gonna...

#389

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Well, you know, we'll just go back to work for a little while.

#390

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Just for a little while 'til we have enough money to buy some more crack.

#391

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And then, we'll go on welfare, and I'll go be a star.

#392

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And then I can be a veterinarian of some kind.

#393

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- Maybe we should think about rehab. - Go to rehab as soon as possible.

#394

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- In a couple days. - Yeah.

#395

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Not now. (shouting)

#396

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- Ah, Jesus Christ! That was close. - Oh, look who it is!

#397

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- What the hell are you doing here? - We're getting our jobs back.

#398

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- You can't have em! - We might have a drug problem.

#399

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Oh, see, I might not really care. Your positions have been filled.

#400

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- So we're gonna take yours. - You're not gonna take our jobs.

#401

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My dad called and said that we could have your jobs.

#402

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We need money to pay our hookers, okay? So you can't have 'em.

#403

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- But we need money to buy crack. - Oh, I'm sorry.

#404

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Did you get addicted to crack? Did somebody get addicted to crack?

#405

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(mock crying) I sweat uncontrollably!

#406

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I can't get somebody to have sex with me unless I pay for it!

#407

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(arguing) Children, what's all the fighting about?

#408

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Did you tell them that they could have our jobs?

#409

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Why don't we go on inside where it's nice and warm

#410

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and we can settle this like a family?

#411

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- Yeah, what about the slaves? - Slaves are gone.

#412

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They were bringing me down. Plus, you know they don't drink?

#413

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- Drink? I want a drink. - Wait, wait, wait!

#414

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Stop a second. There are gonna be some changes made. All right?

#415

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First of all, you two from now on are gonna do all of Charlie's work.

#416

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- No. Not his. - Stop!

#417

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Charlie, you got a lot of balls stealing my money.

#418

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This shows leadership. I am promoting you to management.

#419

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- That's why I did it. - That's fantastic!

#420

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That's why I did it too, Frank. I stole lots of money. What do I get?

#421

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You get dick, because you are a follower and a thief.

#422

⇓

How come Charlie? Not fair.

#423

⇓

- How come Charlie? - Why would you do this to us, Dad?

#424

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Because you are crackheads, children.

#425

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- Crack. - Crack.

#426

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