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Home » South Park » S26E03 — Japanese Toilet

South Park

Season 26, Episode 3 — Japanese Toilet

TMDB episode metadata

Show: South Park

Episode title: Japanese Toilet

Air date: March 01, 2023

Director: Trey Parker

Top billed cast: Trey Parker, Matt Stone, Mona Marshall, Jennifer Howell

South Park learns about the wonders of Japanese toilets.

Source: TMDB

↓

Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com

corrected queenmaddie synced synced-corrected

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* I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time *

goin park south south-park

↓

* Friendly faces everywhere *

faces friendly friendly-faces

↓

* Humble folks without temptation *

folks humble humble-folks temptation

↓

* Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind *

behind goin park south south-park woes woes-behind

↓

* Ample parking day or night *

ample ample-parking night parking

↓

* People spouting, "howdy, neighbor!" *

howdy howdy-neighbor neighbor spouting spouting-howdy spouting-howdy-neighbor

↓

* Heading on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind *

heading park south south-park unwind

↓

* Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmhmhm rm! *

mrph mrph-rmhmhm rmhmhm

↓

* Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine *

friends meet park south south-park

↓

See, Stan? You gotta choose

choose stan

↓

if you wanna be in Gryffindor or Slytherin.

↓

Yeah, can I do it?

↓

Yeah, see, you gotta fight these fairy guys.

fairy fight

↓

Randy.

randy

↓

Randy!

randy

↓

The powder room toilet is broken.

broken powder room toilet

↓

Again!

↓

Did you jiggle the handle?

handle jiggle

↓

Yes, I jiggled the handle.

handle

↓

Will you come fix this, please?

↓

Okay, okay.

↓

Huh, well, let's see.

↓

It's gotta be the little black floaty thingie.

black

↓

What'd you do to it?

whatd

↓

I didn't do anything.

↓

Lemme see if there's water in the bowl.

bowl water

↓

No! Don't lift the lid.

lift

↓

Why can't I lift the lid?

lift

↓

- Don't, Randy! - Uh-huh.

randy

↓

Hey, guys! Your mom took a shit

↓

and doesn't want me to see it.

↓

- Ew! - Gross, Dad!

gross

↓

Randy! We need to get a new toilet.

randy toilet

↓

We can't just get rid of ol' blue, Sharon.

blue sharon

↓

This is embarrassing.

embarrassing

↓

It's the powder room toilet, the one guests use.

guests powder room toilet

↓

You get a new toilet, Randy,

randy toilet

↓

or I'm not helping you sell weed anymore!

anymore helping sell weed

↓

Alright, alright. Sharon, you win.

alright alright-alright sharon

↓

As usual.

usual

↓

Poor ol' Blue.

blue poor

↓

Can I help you with anything?

↓

Oh, yeah, just lookin' for a new toilet to replace Ol' Blue.

blue lookin replace toilet

↓

Alright, well, all our toilets here are standard bowl,

alright bowl standard toilets

↓

come with full warranty.

full warranty

↓

How much you looking to spend?

looking spend

↓

Well I'm not poor.

poor

↓

I happen to have my own weed business.

business happen weed

↓

So that's pretty much the nicest one you have, right?

nicest

↓

Yeah, that's probably the top model, you know,

model

↓

before you start getting into the Japanese toilets.

japanese japanese-toilets start toilets

↓

Japanese toilets?

japanese japanese-toilets toilets

↓

Yeah, they're the sort of the super-high-class

class super

↓

luxury models with all the bells and whistles.

bells luxury models whistles

↓

But you probably don't wanna spend that kind of money.

money spend

↓

I'm not poor.

poor

↓

Oh, well, we can show them to you.

↓

The Japanese toilets are right over there.

japanese japanese-toilets toilets

↓

Hi, Rick. This gentleman

gentleman rick

↓

would like to see the Japanese toilets.

japanese japanese-toilets toilets

↓

Well, of course, sir. My name is Rick.

course name rick

↓

Let me know if there's anything you need.

↓

These toilets are all equipped with the highest-end features,

equipped features highest toilets

↓

including an automatic bidet system,

automatic bidet including system

↓

bluetooth capability, and seat warmers.

bluetooth seat warmers

↓

Seat warmers?

seat warmers

↓

Of course.

course

↓

And the toilet senses when you've come into the room,

room senses toilet

↓

turns on a small light, plays welcome music,

light music plays turns welcome

↓

and raises the lid for you.

raises

↓

Can I offer you some sparkling water or champagne?

champagne offer sparkling water

↓

Oh, sure, I'll take some champagne.

champagne

↓

All the toilet's functions are operated

functions toilets

↓

by a touch-button remote which you mount

button mount remote touch

↓

where the toilet-paper roll used to go.

paper roll toilet toilet-paper used

↓

So then where do you keep the toilet paper?

paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

With a Japanese toilet, you don't need toilet paper.

japanese japanese-toilet paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

The toilet washes you completely clean.

clean completely toilet washes

↓

You're mad.

↓

No, it's true.

↓

It has warm water and a dryer

dryer warm water

↓

and cleans you eight times better than toilet paper can.

cleans eight eight-times paper times toilet toilet-paper

↓

Would you like to take one for a test drive?

drive test

↓

Oh, uh, sure.

↓

I did have kind of a big breakfast.

breakfast

↓

Right over here.

↓

* Oh, yeah *

↓

* I, I, I *

↓

Oh.

↓

* Oh, yeah *

↓

Ooh. Oh, oh! Oh.

↓

Ahhh!

ahhh

↓

Oh, oh!

↓

Ohh! Oh.

↓

Okay, how much?

↓

Guys, I wanted to talk to you because I want you all

wanted

↓

to think about how we're viewed as a family.

family

↓

You know, as a prominent weed dealer, we are successful,

dealer prominent successful weed

↓

and we're sort of looked up to in this town

looked town

↓

because we have nice things that most families can't afford.

afford families

↓

I mean, Stan, you're playing "Hogwarts Legacy"

legacy playing stan

↓

on PS5, right?

↓

You're playing "Hogwarts Legacy" on a PS5.

legacy playing

↓

Yeah, my... my point is that most people in town

point town

↓

don't even have a PS5.

↓

They still have PS4s,

↓

and so we're basically the Kennedys of South Park.

park south south-park

↓

And the plain fact is that well-off families

fact families plain

↓

have nice things,

↓

and we shouldn't be ashamed of that.

ashamed

↓

Oh, new toilet's here.

toilets

↓

Hajimemashite. Japanese Torei des!

japanese

↓

Uh, yes, thank you. Bring it on in.

bring

↓

Kyo fun yori! Kro fun yori!

fun

↓

Kyo fun yori! Kro fun yori! Kro fun yori!

fun

↓

That's the new toilet? How much did it cost?

cost toilet

↓

Oh, Sharon. Tennish.

sharon

↓

What's tennish?

↓

Tennish.

↓

Thousandish. Ten thousandish.

↓

You spent $10,000 on a toilet?!

spent toilet

↓

We don't have that kind of money, Randy!

money randy

↓

Yeah, we do.

↓

Shitsurei Shimasu! Owarimashita.

↓

Okay, yeah, right here? Okay.

↓

Doomo! Aringanto gozaimashita!

↓

Aringato gozaimashita!

↓

K, thanks.

thanks

↓

You are taking that back to the store.

store

↓

Try it, Sharon.

sharon

↓

I don't need to, Randy. I want...

randy

↓

Try it, Sharon!

sharon

↓

* Oh, yeah *

↓

Oh. Oh.

↓

* I, I, I *

↓

Oh! Ohh!

↓

Ah-ha-ha!

↓

I wanna try it.

↓

Shhh!

shhh

↓

Ah-ho-ho!

↓

Ohh!

↓

Oh, look, there he goes.

↓

It's Mr. Big Shot.

shot

↓

Hey, Richie Rich. You eating caviar

eating rich richie richie-rich

↓

for lunch today, Richie Rich?

lunch lunch-today rich richie richie-rich today

↓

Stan, just so you know, nobody gives a shit.

gives nobody nobody-gives stan

↓

About what?

↓

Come on, guys!

↓

Did you know some people can't even afford to eat?

afford

↓

How about caring for something that matters, you bitch?

bitch caring matters

↓

What the fuck?

fuck

↓

Hey, Stan, you really have to be careful.

careful stan

↓

Of what?

↓

Look, it's great that you come from a wealthy family,

family wealthy

↓

but people don't like getting their noses rubbed in it.

noses rubbed

↓

Dude, I haven't even said anything!

↓

Well, your dad called everyone last night

called night

↓

and told them you have a $10,000 toilet.

toilet

↓

What?!

↓

Well, thanks for having us over for brunch, Randy.

brunch having randy thanks

↓

Yeah, what's the special occasion?

occasion special

↓

Oh, you know, just good times with dear friends.

dear friends times

↓

Does anyone need to go to the bathroom?

bathroom

↓

Uh, no, I'm... I'm good.

↓

Oh, maybe some more coffee, then.

coffee

↓

Can you guys believe all the snow we've gotten?

believe gotten snow

↓

Yeah, maybe it will actually help with the drought.

↓

Let's hope so.

hope

↓

Does anyone need a bathroom break?

bathroom break

↓

Well, actually, I-I think I could use the restroom.

restroom

↓

That was kind of a big breakfast.

breakfast

↓

Oh! Oh, yeah, sure! It's, uh...

↓

It's right across the hallway.

hallway

↓

Right there.

↓

Excuse me.

excuse

↓

Oh.

↓

What was that?

↓

Oh, that's the welcome music for my Japanese toilet.

japanese japanese-toilet music toilet welcome

↓

I've heard of those. Aren't they expensive?

expensive heard

↓

Yeah, a bit.

↓

But for those of us who can afford it,

afford

↓

it's well worth it.

worth

↓

Oh! Ohhh!

ohhh

↓

Ohhhh!

ohhhh

↓

He's now turned on the rear jet,

rear turned

↓

which cleans your bottom with warm water.

bottom cleans warm water

↓

Oh. Ohhh!

ohhh

↓

Ah! That's the front washer

front washer

↓

that washes your balls, or vagina.

balls vagina washes

↓

If you think about it, a dry piece of toilet paper

paper piece toilet toilet-paper

↓

can't clean you half as well as pressurized water.

clean half water

↓

I feel bad that most people have to walk around

walk

↓

with fecal matter on their anus,

anus fecal fecal-matter matter

↓

but I'm just lucky

lucky

↓

I've sold enough weed to be able not to.

able sold weed

↓

But was it really luck? Or was it hard work?

hard luck

↓

Heck, I don't know, but you know...

heck

↓

Dad, can I talk to you?!

↓

Stan? You're back from school already?

school stan

↓

I need to talk to you right now!

↓

The fuck are you doing?!

fuck

↓

Fuck are you doing?

fuck

↓

You need to stop gloating to everybody!

everybody gloating

↓

I am not gloating.

gloating

↓

Yes, you are, and now kids at school

kids school

↓

are calling me Richie Rich!

calling rich richie richie-rich

↓

They are?

↓

Nobody cares about your stupid toilet

cares nobody nobody-cares stupid toilet

↓

- and you're acting like a jerk. - You're stupid.

acting jerk stupid

↓

I'm acting like a jerk because I'm trying to help people?!

acting jerk

↓

How are you trying to help people, Dad?

↓

Because the people don't know that these toilets are awesome,

awesome toilets

↓

and I'm just, like, the well-respected guy

respected

↓

who's trying to open people's eyes like JFK.

eyes open peoples

↓

You are not like JFK!

↓

You're just showing off!

showing

↓

Nu-uh, I'm like JFK 'cause I am trying to change things!

change

↓

You're part of a very respected family, Stan.

family part respected stan

↓

You should start acting like it.

acting start start-acting

↓

Okay, who's next?

↓

* Oh, yeah *

↓

* I, I, I *

↓

* Atashi wa Heia des-u *

↓

* Toire ni iru kara *

↓

- Randy? - * Kimochi I I *

randy

↓

- Randy! - What?!

randy

↓

Your proctologist is here to see you.

proctologist

↓

My proctologist?

proctologist

↓

Oh, hey there, Doc.

↓

Well, Randy Marsh, how are ya?

marsh randy randy-marsh

↓

I'm doing great. How are you?

↓

Wonderful! Just been super busy.

busy super

↓

I'm actually takin' the wife to Tuscany day after tomorrow.

takin tomorrow tuscany wife

↓

Tuscany? Wow. Awesome.

awesome tuscany

↓

Yeah, well, Randy you haven't been in my office

office randy

↓

for a few days, so I thought I'd come

days

↓

do a house call to help you with your hemorrhoids.

house

↓

Oh! No, Doctor.

doctor

↓

I haven't needed to come to your office.

needed office

↓

In fact, I don't think I'll be needing your services anymore

anymore fact needing services

↓

since I've gotten a Japanese toilet.

gotten japanese japanese-toilet toilet

↓

Oh... Oh, really?

↓

It's completely changed my life.

changed completely life

↓

I'm healthier, I'm less stressed,

healthier less stressed

↓

and I don't get hemorrhoids 'cause I'm not smearing shit

↓

all over my ass with toilet paper.

paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

Huh.

↓

Here, here. You wanna come see it?!

↓

Go on, check it out.

check

↓

D-Dr. Sheltair?

↓

Dr. Sheltair?!

↓

You stupid!

stupid

↓

You ruined Tuscany! Gah!

ruined tuscany

↓

- Stop it! - I hate you!

hate

↓

I hate you! I hate you!

hate

↓

Go on! Get out of here!

↓

How am I supposed to tell my wife

supposed wife

↓

we can't afford to go to Tuscany now?!

afford tuscany

↓

I never realized you made so much money off my ass.

money realized

↓

Go on. Get.

↓

Get!

↓

Hey, Stan! Stan hold up!

stan stan-stan

↓

What?

↓

Well, um, you're just a really good friend, Stan,

friend stan

↓

and... and I was gonna ask if maybe

↓

I could borrow your plungercost?

borrow

↓

What's a plungercost?

↓

It doesn't cost nothing when your toilet's nice as yours, Richie Rich!

cost rich richie richie-rich toilets

↓

I did it! I called Stan Richie Rich, too!

called rich richie richie-rich stan

↓

That was fun!

fun

↓

Stan, you've got to stop bragging about your toilet.

bragging stan toilet

↓

I'm not bragging about my toilet!

bragging toilet

↓

And why is it such a big deal anyway?

deal

↓

It's a big deal, Stan. You just don't understand why.

deal stan

↓

Have you ever asked yourself why we use toilet paper?

asked paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

We're told to wash our hands... wear masks in crowds...

crowds hands masks wash wear

↓

but for some reason, when it comes to wiping our ass,

comes reason wiping

↓

we're told to do it with this little piece of paper.

paper piece

↓

We are all... all of us... Walking around right now

walking

↓

with a little bit of shit smeared on our buttholes.

buttholes

↓

Did you know that 70% of people in the world

world

↓

don't even use it at all?

↓

70% of the world doesn't use toilet paper?

paper toilet toilet-paper world

↓

Look it up.

↓

Most people in the world still use good ol' soap and water.

soap water world

↓

The average American uses 140 rolls

american average rolls uses

↓

of toilet paper per year.

paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

Can you even begin to imagine how many trees that is?

begin imagine trees

↓

To supply the United States its toilet paper,

paper states supply toilet toilet-paper united united-states

↓

it takes 31.1 million trees per year.

million takes trees

↓

A million acres per year of precious

acres million precious

↓

Canadian Boreal forest alone,

alone canadian forest

↓

releasing upwards of 25 metric tons of CO2

releasing tons

↓

and leveling 90% of the land barren.

land

↓

So, then, why do Americans use it so much?

americans

↓

Well, that's the big question, isn't it?

question

↓

None of it makes any sense.

makes sense

↓

- Well, then, maybe somebody... - Just tell your dad to stop.

somebody

↓

Americans don't want to change their toilets

americans change toilets

↓

and they never will.

↓

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a public service announcement.

announcement gentlemen ladies public public-service public-service-announcement service service-announcement

↓

One of our citizens has asked to speak with you.

asked citizens speak

↓

Please welcome Mr. Randy S. Marsh.

marsh randy welcome

↓

Thank you, Mayor. Thank you, everyone.

mayor

↓

You know, the Marshes are a family that try to always

family

↓

lead by example.

example lead

↓

And we know that all of you appreciate that.

appreciate

↓

Everyone deserves to be clean, and the truth is, you can be.

clean deserves truth

↓

You might not be the Marshes,

might

↓

but you can afford a Japanese toilet.

afford japanese japanese-toilet toilet

↓

Just not a really nice one like what we have.

↓

If you take into account the money

account money

↓

we all spend on toilet paper, doctors, and hemorrhoid cream,

cream doctors paper spend toilet toilet-paper

↓

a Japanese toilet pays for itself in just a few years.

japanese japanese-toilet pays toilet years

↓

There are actually Japanese toilets made for commoners.

japanese japanese-toilets toilets

↓

Walmart and Amazon all carry the lower

amazon carry lower walmart

↓

cost of shitty Japanese toilets that anyone can afford.

afford cost japanese japanese-toilets shitty toilets

↓

There's even these like attachment thingies

attachment thingies

↓

for your existing toilet

existing toilet

↓

which will make you feel like a Marsh yourself.

marsh

↓

They may not be Nihon No style-ru,

style

↓

but they are good enough for you guys.

↓

The point is... even commoners don't need toilet paper anymore!

anymore paper point toilet toilet-paper

↓

And, so, I am suggesting that this town puts all...

suggesting town

↓

Holy shit!

holy

↓

Randy?! Wah!

randy

↓

I'm sorry, but he's in critical condition.

condition critical

↓

Who shot him?

shot

↓

Nobody knows.

knows nobody nobody-knows

↓

Is he gonna be okay?

↓

He's in a coma.

coma

↓

He's unconscious and just blabbering nonsense.

nonsense unconscious

↓

Bikkuri... Bikkurishita... Taiehn deshou...

↓

Mr. Marsh, your whole family is here.

family marsh whole whole-family

↓

Your wife, your daughter, and your son.

daughter wife

↓

T-Toire Wa?

↓

No, your toilet is back at the farm.

farm toilet

↓

Taihen ja naaaa...

naaaa

↓

Dad, I'm sorry I yelled at you before.

yelled

↓

I didn't know you were really trying to help.

↓

Kon-nichi waaa...

↓

- Stan, where are you going? - I let dad down once.

stan

↓

Somebody has to pick up where he left off.

left pick somebody

↓

I promise we're doing all we can.

promise

↓

I'm sorry for what happened,

happened

↓

but you need to leave it to the professionals.

professionals

↓

There's something more going on here.

↓

I think my dad was on to something and I

↓

didn't listen to him, and now he's in a hospital.

hospital

↓

We've already got a few leads

leads

↓

and we're following up on all of them.

following

↓

I assure you we take this all very seriously.

assure

↓

This isn't a joke to us.

joke

↓

- Chief, hey, Chief! - Yeah?

chief

↓

An angry proctologist walked in

angry proctologist walked

↓

to the toilet section of Home Depot.

depot home home-depot section toilet

↓

Y-Yeah?

↓

Proctologist says to the toilet manager,

manager proctologist toilet

↓

"I ain't taking the fall," and pulls a gun

aint fall pulls

↓

on six Japanese delivery men.

delivery japanese

↓

Okay.

↓

So, then, the six Japanese delivery men show up,

delivery japanese

↓

and the proctologist has everyone held hostage

held hostage proctologist

↓

and says he's not taking the fall

fall

↓

for the Randy Marsh shooting.

marsh randy randy-marsh shooting

↓

Oh, shit, this is actually happening?!

↓

Come on, people, let's go!

↓

I ain't going down for this!

aint

↓

You got that, coppers?! I didn't shoot anybody!

anybody shoot

↓

But if I'm going down,

↓

I'll take these careless bastards out with me!

bastards careless

↓

Would you like some sparkling water or champagne...

champagne sparkling water

↓

Get... Get outta here!

outta

↓

Come on out.

↓

There's no other way, we have you surrounded.

surrounded

↓

I didn't shoot Randy Marsh!

marsh randy randy-marsh shoot

↓

- Taihen! - Nobody's saying you did!

nobodys

↓

No, but they're gonna use me as their scapegoat!

↓

They'll fix things like they always do!

↓

- Who will? - They'll use their lawyers

lawyers

↓

and their power to make it all go away!

power

↓

Just like they did back when that 2nd grade kid

grade

↓

wrote a story in the school paper about toilets

paper school story toilets wrote

↓

two years ago!

years

↓

They'll take me out, too!

↓

There's no stopping them!

stopping

↓

Don't do it!

↓

Sabishiiiii!

↓

Aww! Alright move in!

alright

↓

Secure the area.

area secure

↓

2nd grade kid two years ago...

grade years

↓

Wrote about toilets in the school news paper.

news paper school toilets wrote

↓

You weren't warning me about people getting upset.

upset warning

↓

You know more about this.

↓

Hey!

↓

You wrote a story in the school paper

paper school story wrote

↓

and someone came after you!

↓

Yeah I wrote a story, big deal!

deal story wrote

↓

Jimmy, I want to know who shot my dad!

jimmy shot

↓

They took everything from me, Stan.

stan

↓

My bike... my cat...

bike

↓

They were gonna sue my parents

parents

↓

for what I wrote in the school paper.

paper school wrote

↓

You're talking about the toilet paper companies.

companies paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

Who has the most to lose? It's all toilet paper, Stan!

lose paper stan toilet toilet-paper

↓

Follow the money! 140 rolls per American per year.

american follow money rolls

↓

Factories pushing out roll after roll

factories pushing roll

↓

while razing Earth's resources.

earths resources

↓

All of this for an unsanitary product

product

↓

that has been proven to contribute to anal fissures.

anal contribute proven

↓

Don't you get it, man?

↓

Paper doesn't clean bacteria. It can't stop viruses.

bacteria clean paper

↓

With all that information,

information

↓

you'd think the world health organization

health organization world

↓

would do studies to find alternatives.

alternatives studies

↓

So why don't they?

↓

Because toilet paper is an industry worth

industry paper toilet toilet-paper worth

↓

billions and b-billions of dollars.

billions dollars

↓

Kimberly-Clark, Georgia-Pacific, Procter & Gamble.

clark gamble georgia pacific

↓

They don't want Japanese toilets in America

america japanese japanese-toilets toilets

↓

and they have the power to stop them,

power

↓

and to stop you.

↓

I can't believe they shot my dad...

believe shot

↓

because he wanted to change things.

change wanted

↓

These people have deeper pockets than you can possibly imagine.

deeper imagine pockets possibly

↓

They can destroy everything you love, Stan.

destroy love stan

↓

Take my advice...

advice

↓

Don't. Squeeze. The Charmin.

squeeze

↓

You might be too scared Jimmy, but I'm a Marsh.

jimmy marsh might scared

↓

My fellow Americans...

americans fellow

↓

we have been coerced and brain washed.

brain washed

↓

While the rest of the world walks around

rest walks world

↓

with cleaner buttholes, we are obsessed with dry paper

buttholes cleaner obsessed paper

↓

sold to us by billion-dollar corporations.

billion billion-dollar corporations dollar sold

↓

- Yeah. - Hey, yeah, he's right!

↓

My father wanted everyone to see that there were alternatives.

alternatives father wanted

↓

But they don't want him talking about alternatives!

alternatives

↓

Yeah!

↓

And we can't be blindly buying their products anymore.

anymore blindly buying products

↓

And as a town, we will find alternatives,

alternatives town

↓

and we will not be afraid to...

afraid

↓

Stop! Stop! We're not doing this!

↓

- Dad! - Everyone just stop,

↓

we're not doing this.

↓

Thank you. South Park, uh, we-we're cutting this short.

cutting park short south south-park

↓

I was totally wrong and I want to apologize.

apologize

↓

No, dad, it's the toilet paper companies

companies paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

- that are behind all the... - Yeah, I know.

behind

↓

Yeah, so, uh, w-we have nothing against toilet paper.

paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

It's a great product and, uh,

product

↓

it was childish of me to make fun of it.

childish fun

↓

Thanks, though. We'll see ya later.

thanks

↓

Dad, we can't just back down.

↓

Bro! I got fucking shot!

fucking shot

↓

Japanese toilets are totally unnecessary,

japanese japanese-toilets toilets unnecessary

↓

and, uh, in case anyone else is listening,

case listening

↓

I think all of South Park would like to apologize.

apologize park south south-park

↓

We retract what we said about toilet paper companies.

companies paper toilet toilet-paper

↓

They... They have done nothing but help us, and we are sorry.

↓

South Park... everyone... Say you're sorry.

park south south-park

↓

We're sorry.

↓

Okay, great. Come on, guys, let's go home.

home

↓

What about helping people and leading by example?

example helping leading

↓

We're not the Goddamn Kennedys, Stan.

goddamn stan

↓

Stop being an idiot.

idiot

↓

Nice to have you back, Ol' Blue.

blue

↓

You know, guys, I'm actually not that sad.

↓

Having a Japanese toilet was great, but...

having japanese japanese-toilet toilet

↓

I've come to realize that,

realize

↓

when you have some big, nice luxury thing,

luxury

↓

it eventually just becomes normal.

becomes eventually normal

↓

But you start comparing it to all the other things

start

↓

in your life which suddenly feel you have to upgrade, too.

life suddenly upgrade

↓

So, it's really best to just

best

↓

stick with the beat-up, crappy old things we have.

beat crappy stick

↓

Love you forever, Honey.

forever honey love

↓

Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com

corrected queenmaddie synced synced-corrected