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I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson

Season 3, Episode 4 โ€” SO NOW EVERY TIME Iโ€™M ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING I REALLY WANT TO DO, I ASK MYSELF, โ€œWAIT A MINUTE, WHAT IS THIS?โ€

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Can't believe this place was near the office all that time
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and none of us knew.
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Yeah, my salad is lights out.
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This is so my new spot.
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-Oh my God, you hear about Jenna? -What happened?
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She took her mom to a play this weekend and her mom fell coming out the theater.
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-[gasps] -Oh God, is she okay?
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She's fine. She's just on bedrest for three weeks in Jenna's living room.
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-Oof. -Christ, that's awful.
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Yeah. I would not wanna be Jenna right now.
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-Me either. -I wouldn't wanna be Jenna either.
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-Now Jenna has to take care of her mom-- -I'd wanna be Mike.
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Just 'cause Mike has the best friend group.
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Yeah. Totally.
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Jenna's not coming in at all this week. She has to prep at home without her team.
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-Man, that is rough. -That's why I wanna be Mike.
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His friend group has a smooth rhythm,
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all orchestrated perfectly by Mike.
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Yeah, it's a good group of guys.
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Yeah, my friend group is a good group of guys too.
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It's 200 guys.
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-Wow. -Yeah.
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So I'm thinking about going over to Jenna's
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and seeing if her and her mom need food.
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-That's nice. -I just feel bad.
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I think the main problem of my friend group
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is I have to pay to be in it.
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-You have to pay to be in your group? -Like a service. I was second tier.
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But then I was annoying at a party so now I'm paying the most.
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-What'd you do? -Thought it'd be funny
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to be a wild man in the pool.
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-What do you mean? -I was fighting everybody
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and trying to splash water in their mouths.
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-So now I pay more. -Stuart.
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-Should not have to pay for being-- -Crap! One of my friends!
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-Did he see what I was eating? -Are you in trouble?
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Come here right now, Stuart!
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[ominous instrumental flare]
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-Hey. -How many friend parties
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did you go to this week?
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-Three. -And how many parties
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are you allowed at your tier?
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-Two. -Then why, oh, why, Stuart,
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were you at a third party?
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-I rented the house for the party! -Hey! We don't yell at me.
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You're right. You're right.
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What were you eating over there?
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Nothing. It was something healthy.
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Let's take a little walk. I wanna talk to your buddies.
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-I'm gonna ask for myself. -Okay.
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Hi. How are ya?
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I'm Stuart's friend.
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Can you guys tell me what he ate?
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-I really didn't notice. -Don't know.
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Can you do me a huge favor? Make sure he doesn't eat too much.
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See, Stuart's a lot more annoying when he's heavier.
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-Not really our business. -Just a favor.
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Just a little favor.
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-[ominous instrumental flare] -Whoa! Who are you?
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You have friends?
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-I do. -You do?
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No. You don't have friends.
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-I do. -They good friends?
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How would you like 200 friends?
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Just like this!
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-[dishes clatter] -[gasps]
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-Oh my God. -Sorry.
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It's okay.
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It's okay. You're okay.
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Everyone farts. It's just when I slammed my two hands down,
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I squoze and farted. You're okay. You'll be fine.
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-It's just really bad. -I know.
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I know it is. It's okay.
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-Want a little drink of water? All right. -No.
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Thank you, Stuart.
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I want you.
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Ever since I was a kid, I've always loved love.
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-I love celebrating each part. -Will you marry me?
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That's why I opened Pacific Proposal Park.
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The perfect place to propose.
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Gardens and gardens of flowers,
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bubbling brooks,
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lighted gazebos,
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rose arches,
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as well as a special spongy soft soilโ€ฆ
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perfect for the most perfect kneel of your life.
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And unfortunately, the perfect place to slam Jerry "the Jet" Jones to the ground.
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Will you marry me?
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-[grunting] -Oh my God!
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These fuckin' wrestlers keep coming in and practicing slams on proposal ground!
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I accidentally built the perfect ring.
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[groaning]
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I built this for love. Now, Toilet Truck made someone pretend he's a truck!
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You're a truck!
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[gravelly] Vroom!
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[imitates truck horn]
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You can't be here, Toilet Truck!
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[yelling]
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-No! -Fuckers!
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Please, stop!
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I was excited to propose to my girlfriend of three years
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on Proposal Park's soft lawn.
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When I kneeled, Baby Duff came out of a bush and bit me on the leg.
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Worst is Toilet Truck and Baby Duff.
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I hope Toilet Truck dies.
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I honestly hope he dies.
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I hope Toilet Truck dies. I hope Baby Duff dies.
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[rapid gunfire]
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Another thing. King Larryโ€ฆ
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is also Scarecrow.
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Saw him change into Scarecrow in his car.
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I saw his whole penis. And it was redder than hell.
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That's what I'm looking at.
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A guy's penis that's about to pop. I don't think he washes himself.
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So please come and have the most beautiful proposal of your life.
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-Come on, King Larry. You gotta go. -All right.
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[soft snapping]
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Did your penis just pop?
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["Got to Give You Up" by Ronnie Whitehead plays]
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-[gentle acoustic music plays] -[chatter]
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[exhales softly]
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Self-conscious about your hair loss?
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Yeah.
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I don't know what to do.
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Like as soon as I hit 40, it started thinning.
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I had the same problem.
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-You did? -Yeah.
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Then I tried Gelutol.
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After three weeks, I saw significant growth.
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After five weeks, I almost had my whole full head of hair back.
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After just five weeks?
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Yes. It works. Trust me.
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-Hey. You guys talking about Gelutol? -No.
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-What are you talking about then? -Don't tell him. Nothing.
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-What was he saying to you? -Don't tell him.
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-What were you talking about? -Sex.
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-Why didn't you tell him? -Don't like him.
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I don't want him to have hair. So take one of these every day.
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In two weeks, you'll start to see results.
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[announcer] Gelutol.
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-You talking shit about me? -What? No.
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-Were you really talking about sex? -Yeah.
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-Fingering. -Really?
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-Not gonna tell you anything. -Why?
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-Gonna tell him something he can't tell. -Fuck do I care?
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-What'd he say? -"Fingering."
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hair growth began in under two weeks.
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Get out of here.
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She had a green jacket. Took it off. She got hot.
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He thinks we're talking about his wife.
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-Gotta put this on. -Why?
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Right now. St. Patrick's Day.
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Drink water.
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I think I want you to have curly hair.
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I gave you the stuff. Don't you think I should have a little say in how it is?
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Bobby! [growls]
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[announcer] In a controlled study of men ages 40-65,
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over 85% of participants experienced partial to complete hair restoration.
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Women who are or may potentially be pregnant
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-I'm gonna go blast the heat. -Why?
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-Don't remember. -Goddammit, I asked you.
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Just tell me yes or no.
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-Was it about me? -A little bit.
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-Nothing! -Said he knows something!
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Not called Gelutol. I been saying it wrong.
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-It's not called Gelutol? -No.
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[gleeful giggle]
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[discordant, unsettling notes play]
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You did exactly what I asked you.
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You actually might end up being a nice little soldier.
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You come see me in a few weeks when you got them curls.
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you get to look at the trees.
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โ™ช Baby, baby, baby, baby, bay-bay-bay โ™ช
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โ™ช Oh, baby, baby, bay-bay-bay โ™ช
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โ™ช Summer love โ™ช
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[announcer] With Megan saving Alexander, it was time to say goodbye to Ronnie.
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Losers! Move!
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[intense and emotional electric guitar solo continues]
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[soft murmur of overlapping chatter]
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Oh, Rachel.
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Nice to meet you. This is my husband, Richard,
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and my parents, Barb and Shane.
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Hi.
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-Yeah, I guess we do. -Yeah. Absolutely.
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Hey, hey, shirt brother. Nice to meet you.
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-[all chuckling] -I like this guy. Shirt brother.
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He's got good taste.
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โ™ช Meet me in St. Louis, Louis โ™ช
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โ™ช Don't tell me the lights are shining โ™ช
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-โ™ช We will dance the hoochie coochie โ™ช -[crowd chuckles]
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โ™ช I will be your tootsie wootsie โ™ช
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โ™ช โ€ฆin my flying machine Going up she goes โ™ช
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โ™ช Up she goes โ™ช
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โ™ช In the air she goes โ™ช
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โ™ช Up a little bit higher โ™ช
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โ™ช Oh my, the moon is on fire โ™ช
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-Come on, shirt brother. -What're you talking about?
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-Come on, let's go. I need you now. -Okay. All right.
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I fucked up really bad. I'm glad you're here, shirt brother.
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-The hell's going on, Shane? -You'll see.
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Okay. Here we go.
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[music fades]
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to see if any were open.
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Then this one was open. So I was just like,
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"What if I just trash this place?"
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going nuts,
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All right. Maybe I can try and help you.
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Iโ€ฆ I'm not sure.
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I'm not either.
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This thing has got me all fucked up.
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Okay. All right.
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Look, Shane, I'veโ€ฆ I've felt this way before.
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You go through life and everything starts to feel really flat.
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I think there just might be no rules.
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Hey, hey, hey, shirt brother, promise me you'll do everything in your power
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[gentle piano music plays]
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[tearfully] I don't know.