Home » It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia » S07E12 — The High School Reunion (1)

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Season 7, Episode 12 — The High School Reunion (1)

MAC, CHARLIE, DENNIS: Reunion! Reunion! Reunion!

#1

⇓

Reunion! Reunion! Reunion! Reunion!

#2

⇓

Reunion! Reunion! Reunion!

#3

⇓

Chug! Chug!

#4

⇓

Oh!

#5

⇓

Yes!

#6

⇓

- Fight song. Go! - Fight song.

#7

⇓

Let's go to the downtown

#8

⇓

Is our motto show

#9

⇓

So let's go, Saint Joe's

#10

⇓

- Screw it. - I never knew this one.

#12

⇓

- That's a stupid song. - Oh, man.

#13

⇓

This reunion is going to be awesome, dude.

#14

⇓

I am going to fire into that school,

#15

⇓

and it is gonna propel me back into the mid-'90s,

#16

⇓

Oh, I am so excited to show these douche bags my new back.

#18

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No brace, fools.

#19

⇓

Oh, oh

#21

⇓

Uh, baby got back, oh

#22

⇓

- Dee, what are you doing? - Baby Got Back.

#23

⇓

You know that one. Sir Mix-A-Lot.

#24

⇓

Baby got, mmm

#25

⇓

Sir Mix-A-Lot was not talking about women

#26

⇓

He was talking about gorgeous Black women

#28

⇓

- and their big, beautiful black butts. - Black butts are good.

#29

⇓

and I can't wait to shove it into these fools faces.

#32

⇓

- So let's get going. - Whatever. I don't give a shit.

#33

⇓

- Smash 'em up? - Let's smash 'em up!

#35

⇓

Smash 'em up!

#36

⇓

- I got these. - Wait, what--what are--

#37

⇓

- what are you doing there, Charlie? - Huh?

#38

⇓

That's not gonna happen, dude.

#41

⇓

We're adults now.

#42

⇓

I'm not taking any risks here, all right?

#43

⇓

And if it does happen, I'm gonna get high.

#44

⇓

I'm gonna go to the bathroom. I'm gonna huff stuff.

#45

⇓

No, Charlie, you don't have to do things like that anymore.

#46

⇓

You don't need to huff shit or eat weird things.

#47

⇓

- To get people to like you. - Nah, I think he does.

#48

⇓

You guys were pretty much nothing in high school.

#49

⇓

you'd definitely be nothing. Nobodies.

#51

⇓

Well, if shit happens, I'm going directly to plan "B".

#52

⇓

We're not gonna have to do plan "B".

#53

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You know, I'm gonna come right out and say that I'm not doing plan "B"

#54

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regardless of what happens with you guys.

#55

⇓

- I'm only here for plan "B". - I don't give a shit.

#56

⇓

Whoa, whoa.

#57

⇓

Faculty or alumni?

#58

⇓

- No, neither one. - Well, you can't go in.

#59

⇓

No, but we're friends. We're buddies. We hang out together.

#60

⇓

- We do everything together. - I don't care.

#61

⇓

Okay, look. I'm gonna go inside

#62

⇓

because Frank, I can't have you ruining this for me.

#63

⇓

But what am I gonna do out here, you know?

#64

⇓

Hang out in the parking lot and drink beer till we're done.

#65

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You smashed all the beers.

#66

⇓

Oh! No, actually, I have a few more.

#67

⇓

You guys want one?

#68

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You can't bring those inside.

#69

⇓

- Well, then, uh, guess what. - I guess let's, uh...

#70

⇓

Smash 'em up!

#71

⇓

All right, turkey.

#72

⇓

- Have a good one. - Yeah, see you, Frank.

#73

⇓

See you, jerk turkey.

#74

⇓

Oh, yeah, baby. This is great. This brings me back.

#75

⇓

I know. I'm like anxious. I'm excited.

#76

⇓

- I can't wait to see the waitress. - Oh, Charlie, give it a rest.

#77

⇓

But we been clickin' lately. This is gonna be a good night for us.

#78

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Like, remember how she was the coolest girl in school?

#79

⇓

- No. - What are you talking about? No.

#80

⇓

Well, she was definitely the prettiest girl in school.

#81

⇓

- You remember that? - No, she's not.

#82

⇓

- She was not. No. - No.

#83

⇓

- Maybe the most forgettable girl in - school. Yeah,

#84

⇓

which by the way is the worst thing you can be in high school.

#85

⇓

- Totally insignificant. - Either way,

#86

⇓

good feelings are gonna get sparked up. I'm gonna see her.

#87

⇓

- She's gonna see me. - You guys, you guys.

#88

⇓

- You guys, you guys. - What?

#89

⇓

- Brad Fisher. Brad Fisher. - Oh.

#90

⇓

He is not gonna be happy to see me after that present I gave him.

#91

⇓

- Uh, what present? - Oh, the box of hornets!

#92

⇓

Oh, that acne really came back, didn't it?

#93

⇓

Yeah, it sure did.

#94

⇓

- The guy looks like shit. - Uh-hmm.

#95

⇓

All right. I'll tell you what. Why don't you guys sneak past him,

#96

⇓

- and Mac and I will pick up the name tags. - Really?

#97

⇓

- How's that sound? - Yeah. Okay.

#98

⇓

- We'll meet you inside. - CHARLIE, DEE: Okay.

#99

⇓

- All right. Go, go, go. - MAC, CHARLIE: Go.

#100

⇓

All right. Come on.

#101

⇓

Hey, hey, hey! It's Brad Fisher.

#102

⇓

All right! How you doin', buddy?

#103

⇓

- Not great. - Oh.

#104

⇓

Yeah, well, the acne definitely came back in full force.

#105

⇓

- Yeah. - That's a shame, but I have products

#106

⇓

that'd clear that acne up, man.

#107

⇓

It's not acne, actually. No, no. It's hornet scars.

#108

⇓

Ooh! Ouch.

#109

⇓

Yikes.

#110

⇓

That--I don't think I have any products that'll...

#111

⇓

that'll take care of hornet scars.

#112

⇓

- That's more of a, uh... - Plastic surgery situation.

#113

⇓

- Yeah, plastic surgery would do it though. - Yeah.

#114

⇓

- They'd blast those monstrous things... - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

#116

⇓

No, we don't, uh--we don't associate with him anymore.

#119

⇓

- All right, I'm gonna take off. - Okay.

#120

⇓

- Let's stay out of that. - Yeah, let's stay out of that.

#122

⇓

Let's just grab our name tags. I don't see 'em over here.

#123

⇓

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, here we go.

#124

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Okay, we got Charlie. We got Dee.

#125

⇓

- I got myself right there. - Yeah.

#126

⇓

And, uh, I'm not seeing yours.

#127

⇓

Yeah, I grabbed mine already.

#128

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- It's in my pocket. - Oh, did you grab it?

#129

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- Yeah. - Oh, okay. Well, pop it on.

#130

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Uh, I'm probably not gonna wear mine. I mean, who wears a name tag, right?

#131

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- That's not cool. - I'm gonna wear mine.

#132

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I'm seeing everybody else wearing their name tags.

#133

⇓

- Uh, it's like the... - So just pop that on, buddy.

#134

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- Nobody calls me this anymore... - Uh-huh.

#135

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...and I feel like it's going to confuse people, and...

#136

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It's not, because everybody called you that in high school,

#137

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so pop it on because it's...

#138

⇓

...it's definitely rule, and they're not gonna let you inside

#139

⇓

- without it, so... - It's been so long.

#140

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It's probably not even my name

#141

⇓

- legally anymore. - You're gonna have to pop it on.

#142

⇓

Okay.

#143

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Good.

#144

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- Well, okay, Ronald McDonald. I... - Don't call me that.

#145

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Well, it's your name.

#146

⇓

get people abuzz about my presence at the reunion,

#148

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and, uh, I'll meet up with you guys later, okay?

#149

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Oh, God.

#150

⇓

No one's--no one calls me...

#151

⇓

- Is he looking? - Who? That guy?

#152

⇓

- Yes. Is he looking at my back, right now? - No. Do you see the waitress anywhere?

#153

⇓

- Come on. Shut up. Is he looking? - He's not looking at your back.

#154

⇓

- Are you sure? - Why are you so obsessed with this guy?

#155

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It's the guy who coined the name "Aluminum Monster."

#157

⇓

- Really? That's him? - Yes.

#158

⇓

- That's cool. I want to meet him. - You have met him, Charlie.

#159

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He called you Dirtgrub and he made you eat spiders.

#160

⇓

- Oh, that guy! - Yeah.

#161

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Oh, I rem--he was, like, so cool. He was, like, way above me.

#162

⇓

Yeah, him and his cronies all thought that they were way above you

#163

⇓

and everybody else,

#164

⇓

but I've got a plan to get revenge.

#165

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I'm gonna sew myself into their inner circle.

#166

⇓

Cool. How you gonna do that?

#167

⇓

I'm gonna lure 'em in with my good looks.

#168

⇓

And then, as far as I remember,

#169

⇓

all you really gotta do to get in with that crowd is be really cruel to people.

#170

⇓

- Right. - So, I'm gonna gain their trust,

#171

⇓

and when the moment's right, I'm gonna strike.

#172

⇓

- Oh, cool. All right. - Mmm-hmm, I'm doing it for us, Charlie.

#173

⇓

- Oh, okay. Thanks. Yeah. - Mmm-hmm.

#174

⇓

- Is it--is it him? - He's coming over.

#175

⇓

- All right. Do you see a spider I can eat? - No, stop.

#176

⇓

- I can eat--I can eat a spider. - Charlie, Just keep your mouth shut.

#177

⇓

Shut up. Keep your mouth shut.

#178

⇓

Hey, um, excuse me, but, um, aren't you the Aluminum Monster?

#179

⇓

Yes. I mean, no. People don't call me that anymore,

#180

⇓

- but yeah. - Nor should they. I mean...

#181

⇓

Wow, you've, uh, you've really transformed. You look great.

#182

⇓

- Really? - Mm-hmm.

#183

⇓

Thanks.

#184

⇓

Hey. Dirtgrub.

#185

⇓

How are you?

#186

⇓

- That's so cool. You're so cool, Adriano. - Yeah.

#187

⇓

Hey, um...

#188

⇓

why don't you smell this?

#189

⇓

Oh, well, it's probably poisonous, right?

#190

⇓

Probably, but, you know, smell it anyway.

#191

⇓

- Should, should I smell it? - Smell it.

#192

⇓

- Aw, well... - Come on.

#193

⇓

Whoa! Whoa, whoa, wait! Charlie, what are you doing, dude?

#194

⇓

Oh, he wanted me to smell a pen,

#195

⇓

and I was going to smell the pen, because it's Adriano...

#196

⇓

No, you don't have to do that anymore.

#197

⇓

Hey, Ronald McDonald, right?

#198

⇓

No. No. No.

#199

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For your information, nobody calls me that.

#200

⇓

Oh, right, right. What did we call you?

#201

⇓

- Ronnie the Rat. - Ronnie the Rat!

#202

⇓

Yeah, I remember. Yeah, yeah.

#203

⇓

Why did we call him that anyway?

#204

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'Cause he was a nark and a tattletale,

#205

⇓

and he became the main drug dealer.

#206

⇓

When he told on the other main drug dealer.

#207

⇓

- Right, yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember. - Yeah.

#208

⇓

Well, looks like the rat got a little too much cheese, huh?

#209

⇓

That's not...

#210

⇓

- Fat. - That's not funny.

#211

⇓

- I've put on mass. - We eat a lot of cheese.

#212

⇓

- We eat a lot of cheese. - To put on mass.

#213

⇓

Didn't you also give everybody ringworm?

#214

⇓

No! No. That was a rumor.

#215

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I only gave ringworm to Charlie.

#216

⇓

Yeah, I--I got it from my dog Poppins,

#217

⇓

and then Charlie and I were wrestling every day

#218

⇓

because we were trying out for the wrestling team, and then, you know,

#219

⇓

- we just passed it back and forth. - We passed it back and forth.

#220

⇓

Although then we did try out for the wrestling team,

#221

⇓

and then I do think a couple of the guys got it on the team.

#222

⇓

- So, yeah, you're right, you're right. - Wow, yeah. Yeah,

#223

⇓

no, that is really gross.

#224

⇓

- I mean, that is... - Mmm.

#225

⇓

...yeah, that's about as low as it gets.

#226

⇓

They probably still have it, 'cause they're so gay together.

#227

⇓

Totally.

#228

⇓

Hey, Dee, why don't you come back to our table? You know, have a drink?

#229

⇓

- Oh, yeah. Okay. - Yeah?

#230

⇓

That sounds cool.

#231

⇓

See you later, Dirtgrub and Ronnie the Rat.

#232

⇓

Hope you suck each other's rotten peckers until you get mouth cancer.

#233

⇓

Mouth cancer. I love this girl.

#234

⇓

- Can I come to the table? - No!

#235

⇓

For some reason, homophobia it's awesome to these guys.

#236

⇓

I'm sewing myself in. I'm doing this for us. Okay?

#237

⇓

What the hell is she talking about?

#238

⇓

She's going to strike when the moment's right.

#239

⇓

She's doing it for us, dude.

#240

⇓

- Really? - Yeah.

#241

⇓

- Did you thank her? - Of course I thanked her. Absolutely.

#242

⇓

- Oh, what's up, boys? - Hey. Hey.

#243

⇓

- All right, I got your name tags. - Oh.

#244

⇓

- Hey, did you get on Mac about his? - Yeah, he's got...

#245

⇓

- It's not that--it's not funny. - That's so funny. That's...

#246

⇓

Adriano came over and blasted him about it.

#247

⇓

- Oh, he did? Oh, good. - That wasn't--that wasn't funny.

#248

⇓

So Adriano's probably gonna tell everybody about it.

#249

⇓

That's going to get around the whole reunion.

#250

⇓

- Get going round and round. - Probably not.

#251

⇓

- All right, so... - Probably getting old already.

#252

⇓

So, listen guys, this is where we part ways, all right?

#253

⇓

So, do not talk to me for the rest of the night,

#254

⇓

and I won't be talking to you, because you lower my stock.

#255

⇓

You guys get it. I'm going to go post up one of these tables around here.

#256

⇓

Let my loyal subjects come and kiss my ring.

#257

⇓

Listen, don't laugh when people make fun of me.

#258

⇓

Yo! Stash. Stash.

#259

⇓

What's up, brother? It's Dennis.

#260

⇓

Here, sit down, man. Let's, let's catch up a little bit.

#261

⇓

Yeah, okay. All right. I'll catch--I'll catch you later, man.

#262

⇓

If you see any of the old crew, let them know I'm posted up over here.

#263

⇓

I don't think they know I'm here.

#264

⇓

- Dennis. - What are you...

#265

⇓

I snuck right by that security prick.

#266

⇓

Look. I got myself a name tag.

#267

⇓

- I'm Nicki Potnick. - Mmm.

#268

⇓

Remember the time you crashed my car into the tree?

#269

⇓

- You went crazy and the tire went... - We had such a good time.

#270

⇓

Okay, Frank, first off, Nicki Potnick is a girl, okay?

#271

⇓

And secondly, she's not 65 years old.

#272

⇓

I don't want to talk to you.

#273

⇓

I don't want to be around you. Go find Mac and Charlie.

#274

⇓

- Go, go, go. - Why--why are you sitting at a table

#275

⇓

with no people?

#276

⇓

- I thought you were cool. - I am cool. Coolest kid here. I'm just,

#277

⇓

you know, I'm posting up, and they're going to come to me.

#278

⇓

I don't know what's going on.

#279

⇓

Hello, Dennis.

#280

⇓

- Ooh. - Oh, goddamn.

#281

⇓

You're late on your alimony.

#282

⇓

Oh. Can we not talk about alimony payments right now?

#283

⇓

We're at our reunion.

#284

⇓

Didn't think you'd run into your ex-wife, huh?

#285

⇓

No, I didn't think about it, Maureen,

#286

⇓

because I don't think about you.

#287

⇓

- Really? - No.

#288

⇓

What do you think about this?

#289

⇓

Ho! Ho!

#290

⇓

It wafted over here. The dead tooth

#291

⇓

it's burning my nose. It stinks.

#292

⇓

What is that supposed to be?

#293

⇓

That's where your monthly payments are going.

#294

⇓

That's a diamond tooth, Dennis

#295

⇓

- A dead tooth, Maureen. - With a diamond in it.

#296

⇓

Put a diamond on anything that's dead, and it's still dead, Maureen.

#297

⇓

It's rotting. Get it out of your face.

#298

⇓

Look, I don't want to talk about these things, all right.

#299

⇓

I don't want to talk to old men who are pretending to be women,

#300

⇓

and--and--and ex-wives, all right?

#301

⇓

I can't be seen like this.

#302

⇓

- Hello, bitches. - Oh, for...

#303

⇓

- That's right. I'm off the wagon. - Yeah.

#304

⇓

You know what, Dennis?

#305

⇓

I went to go find my name tag, they didn't have one for me.

#306

⇓

Oh, really?

#307

⇓

All right, see you later.

#308

⇓

Yeah, I went to go find my name tag. They didn't even have one.

#309

⇓

It's like--it's like what? I never existed?

#310

⇓

I mean, who cares though, right?

#311

⇓

'Cause it's high school. Who cares?

#312

⇓

Hmm.

#313

⇓

Here we go. Here we go. Grab it.

#314

⇓

- Oh, yes! Shots for everybody. - All right.

#315

⇓

Shots for the cool team.

#316

⇓

Oh! Rickety Cricket, everybody.

#317

⇓

Look at this. Rickety Crickety. Rickety.

#318

⇓

Rickety Cricket!

#319

⇓

Hi, Cricks. How are you?

#320

⇓

All cleaned up, huh? Except for that tooth.

#321

⇓

- Well, actually it's Father Mara again. - Is it?

#322

⇓

I cleaned up, yes, and I was welcomed back into the cloth.

#323

⇓

God had a plan for me.

#324

⇓

Took me into a deep valley, but now I'm soaring on eagle's wings.

#325

⇓

- So praise him. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

#326

⇓

All that, street rat. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

#327

⇓

So, hey, what, I tell you what, Crick.

#328

⇓

Should I put my balls on your chin now or later, huh? Huh, huh?

#329

⇓

Down the hatch, everybody.

#330

⇓

Down the hatch, everybody, but you, father.

#331

⇓

All right, well, nonetheless, I say to you peace.

#332

⇓

- Peace be to you, Deandra, okay? - That's weird.

#333

⇓

And peace be to you, my lady.

#334

⇓

And to you, my son. Peace be to you.

#335

⇓

- To you. - Boring.

#336

⇓

Hey! Hey, everybody. Remember me?

#337

⇓

Probably not.

#338

⇓

Sat behind you in Spanish.

#339

⇓

Remember? Sat--sat right next to you in algebra 1.

#340

⇓

- Who the hell is that? - Oh, I don't know.

#341

⇓

I've never seen her before in my life.

#342

⇓

Dee. Dee, you know me, Dee.

#343

⇓

I know Dee. Me and Dee, we go way back.

#344

⇓

Ugh! Bad choice on the dress, know what I mean?

#345

⇓

I know you, bitch. I know you, bitch.

#346

⇓

Wow. Oh, hey.

#347

⇓

More shots. More shots. More shots. More shots! More shots!

#348

⇓

- Yeah. - More shots! I'm the queen of the night!

#349

⇓

I'm the queen of the night. Right, cool table? Yeah.

#350

⇓

Wow! I just shook your dead-tooth wife.

#351

⇓

I mean, I had to wash my hands and face.

#352

⇓

- I am trying to shake you, Frank. - It just smells so bad.

#353

⇓

Please go away from me. Please get away.

#354

⇓

Yo, Dennis!

#355

⇓

Oh, shit. It's Tim Murphy.

#356

⇓

- Son of a bitch. - Who's Tim Murphy?

#357

⇓

Tim Murphy is the asshole that slept with my prom date.

#358

⇓

Dennis Reynolds. What's up, man?

#359

⇓

Oh, hey, Tim.

#360

⇓

This is my wife, Christie. Dennis and I used to be really good friends.

#361

⇓

Oh! Hi. Nice to meet you.

#362

⇓

- Nicki Potnick. - Shut up.

#363

⇓

- Oh, hey, honey? - Yeah?

#364

⇓

- Let's go dance. - Yeah--why don't you go ahead?

#365

⇓

- I'm going to hang for a bit. - Oh, okay.

#366

⇓

Nice to meet you both.

#367

⇓

Uh-oh.

#368

⇓

Va va voom.

#369

⇓

Anyhow, I saw you standing over here alone.

#370

⇓

I wanted to invite you over to our table.

#371

⇓

Oh, I won't be going anywhere with you, Tim.

#372

⇓

Okay, why?

#373

⇓

Don't you play coy with me, you little bitch.

#374

⇓

I'm going to stay right here,

#375

⇓

and I'm going to wait for my minions to swarm me.

#376

⇓

And swarm they will, Tim.

#377

⇓

Alone you'll be.

#378

⇓

Such sad little games we play.

#379

⇓

Right, Tim?

#380

⇓

Right.

#381

⇓

Same old Dennis Reynolds.

#382

⇓

You look good, Nicki.

#383

⇓

- Thank you, Tim! - Mmm.

#384

⇓

Thank you. Seems like a nice guy.

#385

⇓

- He's not. Go! Go away from me! - All right.

#386

⇓

- We just got to get our mojo back. - Yeah.

#387

⇓

- It's all about the confidence--yeah. - Get some drinks in us, and...

#388

⇓

Six beers for the two of us, please.

#389

⇓

Drink tickets for the two of us, please.

#390

⇓

- All right. - Here.

#391

⇓

Dude, this is only four.

#392

⇓

That's all they gave us, bozo.

#393

⇓

Well, that's only two per person, bozo.

#394

⇓

Well, how am I supposed to get drunk

#395

⇓

- off of only four beers? I... - Yeah.

#396

⇓

Is there any way you can work something out or...

#397

⇓

- Two tickets per person, guy. - I didn't ask you, pretty boy.

#398

⇓

It's a conversation between me and the longhair.

#399

⇓

Okay. None for him or the fat bitch.

#400

⇓

You're making this about weight?

#401

⇓

He's gained a lot of weight.

#402

⇓

I'm not going to take some shit from some bartender.

#403

⇓

- Wait--you're a bartender. - He doesn't know that!

#404

⇓

Hey, did you guys see Ronald McDonald's his name?

#405

⇓

Hey! Eight beers, my friends.

#406

⇓

- What's up, buddy? - How are you?

#407

⇓

- Boom! - Buddy.

#408

⇓

- Whoa. - I thought it was only two per person!

#409

⇓

Went to the computer lab.

#410

⇓

Printed out like a hundred of them.

#411

⇓

- Way--way more than I need. - That's awesome.

#412

⇓

- Can we get a few of them? - No. No way.

#413

⇓

- I'm, I'm sorry I brought it up. - Yeah.

#414

⇓

Hey, Adriano, can I get some more of those tickets?

#415

⇓

- Yeah, you bet. Here. Help yourself. - Awesome.

#416

⇓

Son of a bitch! He just gave them to that guy.

#417

⇓

Well, that guy's cool, so...

#418

⇓

Okay.

#419

⇓

- I got--I got an excellent plan, Charlie. - Okay.

#420

⇓

We're going to get everything we need.

#421

⇓

We're going to get our confidence back,

#422

⇓

and we're going to fire back into this room.

#423

⇓

- You ready? - Okay, good.

#424

⇓

- Here we go. - I want those guys to like us.

#425

⇓

- Follow my lead. - Okay.

#426

⇓

Adriano made fake tickets! Those tickets are fake!

#427

⇓

Don't rat on him!

#428

⇓

He made fake ones. He gets to drink and we don't. That's not fair!

#429

⇓

Bro, I'm sorry.

#430

⇓

If those are fake, you can't get any of these beers.

#431

⇓

- Come on. - Ha, ha! You got in trouble.

#432

⇓

- You got in trouble! - Wow. Ronnie the Rat strikes again, huh?

#433

⇓

Thanks a lot, douche bag.

#434

⇓

- You're the worst, Dirtgrub. - Yeah.

#435

⇓

- I didn't have anything to do... - Don't sell me out.

#436

⇓

See what you did, man?

#437

⇓

We're supposed to be on the same team, Charlie.

#438

⇓

See, high school sucks!

#439

⇓

You know what, I'm gonna go to the bathroom.

#440

⇓

I'm going to find stuff to huff. I'm going to get high.

#441

⇓

If I'm the Dirtgrub, I'm going to be the Dirtgrub.

#442

⇓

Ahh! We're going to go into plan "B"

#443

⇓

because I brought Dee's old back brace, and I got it in the car.

#444

⇓

- So, we can implement--a little... - Not now, Frank!

#445

⇓

A little rehearsal or something.

#446

⇓

No, Charlie. Dude, you don't have to do this.

#447

⇓

- We can find another way. - Yes, I do, dude.

#448

⇓

I'm just the Dirtgrub, okay?

#449

⇓

Everyone wants the Dirtgrub, I'll give 'em the Dirtgrub.

#450

⇓

I'll get high. I'll get sad. People can laugh at me. I hate high school, man!

#451

⇓

Charlie. Charlie, don't put the bleach and the ammonia together!

#452

⇓

It's going to knock the shit out of you.

#453

⇓

Don't tell me how to mix my own inhalants. I know how to do inhalants.

#454

⇓

Charlie, it's going to knock you unconscious.

#455

⇓

I know how to do my own inhalants, okay? I don't need that from...

#456

⇓

- Whoops-a-daisy. All right. - That's it.

#457

⇓

Well, let's just wait till he wakes up, and then we'll...

#458

⇓

Oh, well. What have we got here?

#459

⇓

Ronnie the Rat and, uh...

#460

⇓

Hey, look, everyone. Nicki Potnick made it to the reunion.

#461

⇓

Hello.

#462

⇓

Looks like you had a rough couple of years there, Nicki.

#463

⇓

Uh, yeah. I'm a guy now.

#464

⇓

- Mmm. - Mmm. Right. Yeah.

#465

⇓

What are you guys doing, perving out on Dirtgrub over there?

#466

⇓

Yeah, probably.

#467

⇓

That's what these gay guys do.

#468

⇓

They just knock each other out with poppers,

#469

⇓

and then find some kinda rabies-infested rodent

#470

⇓

to tickle each other's taints with.

#471

⇓

No.

#472

⇓

No, that's not what we're doing, all right?

#473

⇓

We are grown adults. We are respected businessmen now.

#474

⇓

You did kind of rat me out there, Ronnie. So...

#475

⇓

Yeah, so I guess it's time to pay the piper, rat,

#476

⇓

and, uh, old man I don't know.

#477

⇓

Whoa! No, no!

#478

⇓

Ow!

#479

⇓

I've been waiting a long time for this.

#480

⇓

- You, you know me, bitch! - Oh, god!

#481

⇓

I'm a grown goddamn man!

#482

⇓

- Ow! My balls! - Ah!

#483

⇓

Do the ladies want to battle with me?

#484

⇓

You should stay away from those people.

#485

⇓

I mean, they--they will ruin your life like they tried to ruin mine.

#486

⇓

A-oh!

#487

⇓

You guys just missed something so awesome that we did.

#488

⇓

- Yeah. - Heed my warning.

#489

⇓

Hey, how you guys doing? Yeah. I'm here.

#490

⇓

Can you believe I came to this thing? Yeah, I was posted up over there.

#491

⇓

- You guys probably didn't see me. - No, we saw you.

#492

⇓

Oh, did you? Oh, okay, well, no reason to be intimidated.

#493

⇓

You know? I'm a human being, after all.

#494

⇓

You know, just a--just a man.

#495

⇓

- Actually, we're good. - Uh, no, Tim. We're not good.

#496

⇓

And you're definitely not good,

#497

⇓

'cause you haven't had a chance to hang out with me yet.

#498

⇓

Um, my wallet's missing.

#499

⇓

Oh, my god, my necklace is missing.

#500

⇓

Oh, come on! My gold chain's gone.

#501

⇓

Where's my wallet?

#502

⇓

Oh, my. And with all the security.

#503

⇓

- The fact you even need it. - Wait a second, Mara.

#504

⇓

What is that around your neck?

#505

⇓

Hmm?

#506

⇓

Oh, that's, uh, probably just a scar that...

#507

⇓

- What the hell? - Ah.

#508

⇓

Ah! I've sinned!

#509

⇓

My god, you are covered in ringworm.

#510

⇓

It's her fault. She told me she loved me.

#511

⇓

We were supposed to be together forever.

#512

⇓

Calm down, Cricks.

#513

⇓

What's he talking about? Dee, were you two together?

#514

⇓

No! Me, with him? What, are you crazy? No!

#515

⇓

Yeah, I told him I loved him once, but that was four years ago.

#516

⇓

You two probably have ringworm together, don't you?

#517

⇓

- No! No, of course I don't have... - No, no, stay away from me!

#518

⇓

To think I was going to let you jack me off.

#519

⇓

- Wait, wait. You were? - Unbelievable.

#520

⇓

Let's get this asshole out of here. Come on.

#521

⇓

- No, no, no! - Come on.

#522

⇓

- Move. Come on! - No, no, no. You guys.

#523

⇓

- You know, I don't have ringworm, right? - No, we don't have ringworm.

#524

⇓

- We don't have ringworm. - No, no. We're cool!

#525

⇓

- Yeah, we're like the... - Oh...

#526

⇓

Oh, really?

#527

⇓

Son of a bitch.

#528

⇓