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Home » It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia » S07E07 — Chardee MacDennis: The Game of Games

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Season 7, Episode 7 — Chardee MacDennis: The Game of Games

TMDB episode metadata

Show: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Episode title: Chardee MacDennis: The Game of Games

Air date: October 27, 2011

Director: Matt Shakman

Top billed cast: Charlie Day, Glenn Howerton, Rob Mac, Kaitlin Olson, Danny DeVito

The gang plays the most twisted board game ever. Dee and Dennis face Mac, Charlie and Frank.

Source: TMDB

↓

So what do you guys wanna do today?

today

↓

- I don't know. - We could sing a song.

sing song

↓

We just ate. We're drinking.

drinking

↓

Hey, you know what? Mac's coming over here pretty soon.

coming macs

↓

Mac's always got something.

macs

↓

- He'll have a plan... - He always has something.

plan

↓

And he'll get us into something good.

↓

we're having a hard time getting into something good.

hard having

↓

- Oh, there he is. There he is! - Good timing!

timing

↓

Mac in the house.

house

↓

Mac in the house.

house

↓

Mac in the house.

house

↓

Got some news...

news

↓

- Got some news for me? - Lay it on us.

news

↓

- What's your news? - No, what's your news?

news

↓

- Give us the news. - Oh, I don't have any news.

news

↓

I thought you guys have news.

news

↓

- You usually fire... - You always come in hot with news.

fire news usually

↓

Yeah, what's the plan?

plan

↓

Oh.

↓

I got nothin'.

nothin

↓

That's disappointing.

disappointing

↓

You usually fire in here with something.

fire usually

↓

- Yeah. - I've actually been kinda bored today.

bored kinda today

↓

- We're bored over here. - You guys bored too?

bored

↓

We are bored out of our goddamn minds.

bored goddamn minds

↓

You got no plan? Didn't run into a thing or...

plan

↓

Don't you remember, love

love remember

↓

We built this city

built city

↓

We built this city on rock and roll

built city rock roll

↓

Oh.

↓

Wait.

↓

Guys, I know what we can do.

↓

You do?

↓

Let's play Chardee MacDennis.

chardee chardee-macdennis macdennis

↓

- Yes! Yes! - No!

↓

- No! - No, no.

↓

- No! 'Cause we're not playing it. - Yes!

playing

↓

What's Chardee MacDennis?

chardee chardee-macdennis macdennis

↓

Chardee MacDennis is an awesome board game

awesome board board-game chardee chardee-macdennis game macdennis

↓

that we came up with many years ago on a day much like today.

today years

↓

- That sounds like fun. - It is not fun.

fun sounds

↓

Chardee! Chardee!

chardee

↓

No, we're not playing it! We're not playing it!

playing

↓

Don't start chanting it.

chanting start start-chanting

↓

Because we're not playing that stupid game!

game playing stupid stupid-game

↓

What's the big deal? It's only a game.

deal game

↓

It's not just a game!

game

↓

It's a war.

↓

Chardee MacDennis, the Game of Games.

chardee chardee-macdennis game games macdennis

↓

Now what we did is, we took our favorite aspects

favorite

↓

of a bunch of different board games and we mashed 'em all together.

board bunch games mashed

↓

We did the same thing with the name, 'cause we couldn't agree upon one.

agree name

↓

Now the point of the game is actually quite simple.

game point simple

↓

It's a race to the finish

finish race

↓

from level one to level three.

level level-three three

↓

- This is the board. - Yes.

board

↓

And we start at level one, which is "Mind."

level mind start

↓

That consists of trivia, puzzles and artistry.

consists puzzles trivia

↓

Yes. It is also the level

level

↓

Whoa! You get to drink during the game?

drink game whoa

↓

Uh, drinking is the game, Frank.

drinking frank game game-frank

↓

- It's the whole point of it. - I'm not gonna play any game

game point whole whole-point

↓

- in which I'm not getting annihilated. - Yes.

↓

Moving on to level two, which is "Body".

body level moving

↓

- Physical challenge, pain and endurance. - Uh-hmm.

challenge endurance pain physical

↓

- That's the beer level. - Yes, and level three is "Spirit".

beer level level-three spirit three

↓

Emotional battery and public humiliation.

battery emotional humiliation public

↓

Boom. Hard-alcohol level.

alcohol boom hard hard-alcohol level

↓

What the hell are you doing, Deandra?

deandra

↓

Oh, this is very important, Frank.

frank

↓

We gotta nail the board down to the bar,

board nail

↓

because at a certain point during the game,

certain certain-point game point

↓

Mac's gonna get very pissed off 'cause he's not doing very well.

macs pissed

↓

He's gonna try and flip the board over.

board flip

↓

He's right. It's for the best.

best

↓

I will forget later that it's nailed down.

forget nailed

↓

- He will. - Okay, here's a big one.

↓

There's a 15 minute time limit to the game.

game limit minute

↓

Fifteen minutes doesn't seem like a long time for a game.

fifteen game minutes

↓

Well, there's a fair amount of clock stoppages.

amount clock fair

↓

Yeah, each team gets three time-outs.

outs team three

↓

There's a halftime, post-level breaks, a two-minute warning

breaks halftime level minute post warning

↓

and a significant amount of injury stoppages.

amount injury significant

↓

Hence the first-aid kit.

hence

↓

Now, pay very close attention to this next part.

attention close part

↓

Each team must collect a certain number of cards at each level

cards certain collect level must number team

↓

in order to progress to the next level.

level order progress

↓

And the first team to complete all three levels wins the game.

complete game levels team three wins

↓

And the winner... Ooh.

winner

↓

The winner gets a sweet prize.

prize sweet winner

↓

Nice!

↓

What's the prize?

prize

↓

The winner gets to smash the other team's game pieces.

game game-pieces pieces smash teams winner

↓

- Yeah. - That's the prize?

prize

↓

You get to smash the team's game pieces?

game game-pieces pieces smash teams

↓

Oh, it's incredibly gratifying.

incredibly

↓

Oh, it's awesome, Frank.

awesome frank

↓

Now these are our game pieces.

game game-pieces pieces

↓

Nice, right?

↓

And these...

↓

are Mac and Charlie's pieces.

charlies pieces

↓

Look at the condition that they're in.

condition

↓

Pretty pathetic.

pathetic

↓

As you can see from the state that these pieces are in,

pieces state

↓

Mac and Charlie have never, ever,

charlie

↓

in the history of Chardee MacDennis, won the game.

chardee chardee-macdennis game history macdennis

↓

You never won?

↓

Never won once?

↓

No. It's almost statistically impossible

impossible statistically

↓

to play that many games and never win, but...

games

↓

It's truly an anomaly.

truly

↓

We haven't won yet, all right?

↓

- But maybe this is our time. All right? - I mean, yeah.

↓

- It is gonna happen. - Watch out! Watch out!

happen watch

↓

Yeah. I'm gonna slit throats.

slit throats

↓

- Nice. - Ack!

↓

I love this game! I want in!

game love

↓

Okay, I want to be Mac and Charlie's partner.

charlies partner

↓

- That seems fair to me, and I'll say why. - Mmm-hmm.

fair seems

↓

Because, you see, Frank's mind is still fairly strong,

fairly fairly-strong franks mind strong

↓

but his body's very, very weak, so I think it's a wash.

bodys wash weak

↓

And his spirit's garbage, so I'm okay with it too.

garbage spirits

↓

- Right. - Hang on a second, dude.

hang second

↓

You can't just jump on our team.

jump team

↓

Let us talk about this.

↓

All right, first of all, we got a team photo, right?

photo team

↓

- Okay, yeah. - So we're gonna have to decide,

decide

↓

you know, do we get a new team photo with or without you?

photo team

↓

Plus, we have a whole new strategy to come up with, you know.

plus strategy whole

↓

Although, our strategy has never worked.

strategy worked

↓

And I hate the team photo.

hate photo team

↓

Okay. You know what?

↓

- Just join our team. - You're on the team.

join team

↓

Don't touch me.

touch

↓

Don't touch me.

touch

↓

Yes, and the Golden Geese

geese golden

↓

are very much looking forward to another annihilation.

another forward looking looking-forward

↓

Yes, we are. Now, in the spirit of tradition,

spirit tradition

↓

I would like to propose that we begin the ritual of sportsmanship.

begin propose ritual sportsmanship

↓

- Good luck to you, sir. - And you, sir.

luck

↓

I do hope you have a good game, miss.

game hope miss

↓

And you, sir.

↓

Why the hell are youse talkin' like that?

talkin youse

↓

Well, this is an important part of the process, Frank.

frank part process

↓

Gives the illusion of respect for your opponent.

gives illusion opponent respect

↓

Things are about to get real dark, real quick, Frank.

dark frank quick real real-quick

↓

It's nice to start off on a positive note.

note positive start

↓

Oh, that reminds me.

reminds

↓

Once the game officially begins, you are not allowed to ask any questions.

allowed begins game officially questions

↓

Yes! In fact, if you do, don't say a question.

fact question

↓

Look it up in the book of rules, okay?

book rules

↓

Jesus Christ!

christ jesus jesus-christ

↓

Oh, I think I understand.

↓

No, you haven't begun to understand, Frank, but that's okay.

begun frank

↓

You'll get it as we go along, like every other board game.

along board board-game game

↓

Dee, how much time?

↓

Uh, 10 seconds.

seconds

↓

Ah! Perfect! Okay, gentlemen.

gentlemen perfect

↓

Suck my dick.

dick suck

↓

What the shit are you doing?

↓

God damn it, Frank.

frank

↓

You asked a question. God damn it.

asked question

↓

Frank, Mac, Charlie, drink for five seconds.

charlie drink five five-seconds frank seconds

↓

Yeah, drink, drink, drink!

drink drink-drink drink-drink-drink

↓

This is how we get psyched up before each level.

level psyched

↓

Yeah, that's our Maori war dance.

dance

↓

It's how we demonstrate intimidation.

demonstrate intimidation

↓

Shows off our physical prowess!

physical shows

↓

All right, Dee, put two more minutes on the clock.

clock minutes

↓

- Let's go. - Yep.

↓

Gentlemen,

gentlemen

↓

level one begins.

begins level

↓

Okay, first card is trivia.

card trivia

↓

Okay, Dee, answer this question correctly, we get the card.

answer card correctly question

↓

- If not, they get a chance to steal. - Yes.

chance steal

↓

All right, what is the greatest band in the world?

band greatest world

↓

Chumbawamba.

↓

Oh, correct! Nice!

correct

↓

Whoa! That's not trivia.

trivia whoa

↓

That doesn't make sense.

sense

↓

Well, we made up all these questions, Frank,

frank questions

↓

so there's gonna be a lot of opinion.

opinion

↓

Yeah, really it's more of a memory game than anything else.

game memory

↓

- But drink. - Drink, bitch.

bitch drink drink-drink

↓

- Let's go. - All right, whatever. Our turn. Our turn.

↓

- Here we go. Ready, Charlie? - Yeah.

charlie ready

↓

No puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles...

puzzles

↓

- Trivia! - Trivia!

trivia

↓

I can do trivia, baby.

baby trivia

↓

Oh, dude, and you definitely wrote this one.

wrote

↓

- Nice. - Lay it on me! Lay it on me!

↓

Question, "Dennis is asshole.

asshole dennis question

↓

Why Charlie hate?"

charlie hate

↓

I know this.

↓

I know. I know.

↓

I don't think I wrote that.

wrote

↓

You definitely wrote this one, Charlie.

charlie wrote

↓

Who else would have written this?

written

↓

- Uh, I'm not remembering that. - Oh, my God.

remembering

↓

- I don't think I wrote that one. - Of course you did!

course wrote

↓

How many other illiterates are in the...

↓

Just throw out a guess.

throw

↓

- Pass. - No!

pass

↓

- You pass? - Pass?

pass pass-pass

↓

Don't... No, he didn't... He didn't pass.

pass

↓

- He didn't pass. - Just throw out a guess.

pass throw

↓

Any guess, come on.

↓

- Pass. - Son of a bitch!

bitch pass

↓

I can't think of one.

↓

- All right, chance to steal. - Oh!

chance steal

↓

Because Dennis is a bastard, man.

bastard dennis

↓

That's what it is.

↓

- I definitely wrote that. - That was it, right?

wrote

↓

- Yeah! - Two cards. Two cards.

cards

↓

Two cards.

cards

↓

I was mad at you about something.

↓

- I wrote that. - Doesn't matter.

matter wrote

↓

Next card is Artistry.

card

↓

And it's an all play, so pay attention, guys.

attention

↓

All play. All play.

↓

"The artist from your team

artist team

↓

must draw the clue from the card on your teammate's back.

card clue draw must

↓

The teammate must guess the clue based solely on feel."

based based-solely clue must solely teammate

↓

You ready?

ready

↓

I'm going to pass the card over to the drawer.

card drawer pass

↓

I draw. I draw. All right?

draw

↓

Yeah, I don't want to have to read it.

read

↓

Oh, this is hard.

hard

↓

- All right, ready? - All right. All right. All right.

ready

↓

- You guys ready? - Yeah.

ready

↓

- Begin! - Go, go, go, go, go!

begin

↓

Hey, go!

↓

Uh, uh, bird?

bird

↓

I'm not getting it, dude.

↓

That's because it's impossible to draw.

draw impossible

↓

I don't know how to...

↓

Jesus, Dee, your back is so bony and crooked and all over the place,

bony crooked jesus place

↓

I can't get a flat surface.

flat surface

↓

- Anger! - Let me have it.

anger

↓

Let Frank go. Let Frank go, go, go, go.

frank

↓

Oh, if only the answer was ribs.

answer ribs

↓

Go, go. Frank, give me... Give me the...

frank

↓

Kicking. Yeah. Kicking.

kicking

↓

He got it. He got it!

↓

Yeah. I forgot about your stupid, strange connection with each other.

connection forgot strange stupid

↓

We get the card. We get the card.

card

↓

Drink, drink, drink, drink, drink, drink, drink.

drink drink-drink drink-drink-drink

↓

No puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles.

puzzles

↓

Chance!

chance

↓

Chance.

chance

↓

This is a great one, Frank.

frank

↓

We stole this straight from Monopoly.

stole straight

↓

It could be good.

↓

- It could be bad. - Mmm-hmm.

↓

- That's the chance. - Got it.

chance

↓

Oh! It's like the best one.

best

↓

"Take the money from everyone's pockets."

everyones money pockets

↓

- That's, like, the best one. - Oh, shit. Goddamn it.

best goddamn goddamn-it

↓

Foo-foo, fork over, foo-foo.

fork

↓

That's the best card there is.

best card

↓

Relax.

relax

↓

Frank, I don't know what you're so excited for.

excited frank

↓

- Give me your money. - What?

money

↓

I'm on your team.

team

↓

Frank, the card says, "Take the money from everyone's pockets."

card everyones frank money pockets

↓

Everyone. You are everyone.

↓

- Charlie gave up his 50 cents. - I got $500 in my pocket.

cents charlie pocket

↓

I'm not putting my money on the table.

money putting table

↓

- You gotta do it, dude. That's the game. - Give it to me.

game

↓

- That's a part of the game, Frank. - Let me see that card.

card frank game game-frank part

↓

No. If you're gonna play the game...

game

↓

- Let me see that card. - That's not a part of the game.

card game part

↓

- Let him see the card. - Show him the card.

card

↓

- Show him the card. - Let him see the card.

card

↓

"Swallow this card whole."

card swallow whole

↓

- Oh! - Cheating!

cheating

↓

- Cheating! - That's cheating.

cheating

↓

You've been caught cheating.

caught caught-cheating cheating

↓

Time's stopped.

stopped times

↓

You've been caught cheating.

caught caught-cheating cheating

↓

We're on the same team, dude.

team

↓

Look, Frank, cheating is tolerated. It's accepted.

accepted cheating frank

↓

It's like a big part of the game,

game part

↓

but if you get caught cheating, they advance to the next level.

advance caught caught-cheating cheating level

↓

- Goddamn it. - You ruined my scheme.

goddamn goddamn-it ruined scheme

↓

Well, you know, in his defense, you were trying to steal his money.

defense money steal

↓

It was not the time to cheat, dude.

cheat

↓

- Enjoy that. - Only one card down.

card enjoy

↓

Yeah, well, it's too late now.

late

↓

- What's done is done, so... - Uh-oh.

↓

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

↓

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

↓

To the Game of Games!

game games

↓

Yes, Frank, good. You're getting it.

frank

↓

Very civil. Mmm.

civil

↓

Can questions now I ask that clock stop-ed?

clock questions

↓

Okay, just 'cause you jumble up the words

jumble words

↓

doesn't make it not a question,

question

↓

but the answer is yes.

answer

↓

When the clock is stopped, all rules are off and civility reigns.

clock rules stopped

↓

- Yes. - Okay. They advance. Do we?

advance

↓

Ah. Yes. I'll explain it to you, Frank.

explain frank

↓

It can get a little confusing.

confusing

↓

They are now in level two.

level

↓

Which means they need only two cards

cards

↓

to advance to level three.

advance level level-three three

↓

We are still in level one.

level

↓

It's a goddamn mind-boggler.

goddamn mind

↓

Yeah, I've never really understood it.

understood

↓

But the point is, if Mac's telling you what to do, listen.

macs point telling

↓

Okay.

↓

Now at level two, there is no more cursing.

cursing level

↓

Oh, yeah.

↓

Big-time level two rule.

level rule

↓

Where we at here? Where we at?

↓

All right. Oh, gentlemen, it's time.

gentlemen

↓

Oh, is it? Kick it!

kick

↓

You flinch, you lose.

flinch lose

↓

Here we go.

↓

- Didn't wince. - It's all right.

↓

- Nothing. Not even a... - All right. All right.

↓

- Oh! - Aw, come on.

↓

Nothing.

↓

The problem is, his hands are like...

hands problem

↓

So tiny.

tiny

↓

If Dee had gotten this, we could have just...

gotten

↓

- Obliterated those giant paws. - All right. I got... I got it.

giant paws

↓

I'm gonna put it right in the center of his hand.

center hand

↓

Do it. Do it.

↓

Oh!

↓

Cheese and crepes!

cheese crepes

↓

All right, hit him, hit him!

↓

Dadgummit!

↓

Let me have a go at it.

↓

- Yeah. - Yeah, here.

↓

Nice! Wait for it.

↓

Wait for it.

↓

- Cheese and crepes. - Son of a gun.

cheese crepes

↓

Cheese and crepes!

cheese crepes

↓

Dee,

↓

we'll be taking this card.

card

↓

- Cheese and crow. - All right, it's our turn.

cheese crow

↓

- Let's go get the cards. - Let's do it.

cards

↓

No, puzzles, no, puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles,

puzzles

↓

no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles,

puzzles

↓

no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles, no puzzles...

puzzles

↓

Chance.

chance

↓

- Chance. Okay. - Okay, all right.

chance

↓

Okay, could be good. Could be bad.

↓

"Go to jail. Do not pass.

jail pass

↓

Go. Do not collect $200."

collect

↓

Sand of a bunch.

bunch sand

↓

Sand of a bunch.

bunch sand

↓

All right, we take our pieces, we put 'em in jail.

jail pieces

↓

Oh, no, no, no, no. Frank, see, you don't get it.

frank

↓

There's no jail on the board, so you go in there.

board jail

↓

- You gotta be kidding me. - Mmm-mmm.

kidding

↓

No, jail's a dog kennel.

kennel

↓

You can get out, but you're not gonna like how.

↓

You gotta eat a cake.

cake

↓

- That's sounds good. - It's not.

sounds

↓

You have to eat the ingredients of a cake.

cake ingredients

↓

- Aw, shit. - One, by one...

↓

- Oh! - Oh!

↓

Stop the clock!

clock

↓

- Dude! - You cursed!

cursed

↓

Aw! I hate this game.

game hate

↓

I hate this game.

game hate

↓

All right, all right, all right.

↓

We drink for five seconds.

drink five five-seconds seconds

↓

No, you're not getting it.

↓

In level two, the other team counts.

counts level team

↓

Four...

four

↓

five...

five

↓

Awful.

awful

↓

- No more cursing. - No more cursing.

cursing

↓

Get in jail.

jail

↓

Let's go.

↓

Yeah. You might want to brush up on some of these rules

brush might rules

↓

- while you're in there too, pal. - Yeah.

↓

That's a good idea. Let him read the rule book.

book idea read rule

↓

Yeah.

↓

All right, our turn.

↓

Ooh, all play.

↓

"Physical challenge...

challenge physical

↓

The Grape Gobble."

gobble grape

↓

Oh, nice!

↓

Grape Gobble's my thing, man.

grape

↓

Charlie's favorite board game?

board board-game charlies favorite game

↓

Hungry Hungry Hippos.

hippos hungry

↓

Hungry Hungry Hippos.

hippos hungry

↓

Ready, set, go.

ready

↓

Go, go, go.

↓

Go, Charlie. Go, Charlie. Go.

charlie

↓

Put my cage on the bar so I can see.

cage

↓

Shut up, dog.

↓

Gobble, gobble, come on.

gobble gobble-gobble

↓

Come on, Dee. Go, go, go.

↓

- And time. - Ho! Ho!

↓

That's time.

↓

Oh, no.

↓

- It's only five. I only got five. - Oh, sheets!

five sheets

↓

- Bed sheets! - Yeah!

sheets

↓

You definitely got more than five.

five

↓

Yeah, yeah! I ate, like, 12!

↓

Wait, wait. Whoa, whoa.

whoa whoa-whoa

↓

You're not supposed to eat them.

supposed

↓

The rule is you're sup...

rule

↓

You're not supposed to eat them.

supposed

↓

There's no way we can tell how many you...

↓

We win the level.

level

↓

- We have Big Bubble. - We get the card!

bubble card

↓

- We're on level three. - We get on level three. Level three now.

level level-three three

↓

- Wait, they're still inside me! - It's still inside him.

↓

- Yeah, let... - I can get them out!

↓

- Doesn't matter! - Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter now.

matter

↓

Golden Geese!

geese golden

↓

Golden Geese!

geese golden

↓

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

↓

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

↓

We move on to level three!

level level-three three

↓

I hate this game! I hate this game!

game hate

↓

- Oh, no, this part. Oh, my God. - Oh.

part

↓

- Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, I know this game.

game

↓

Board flipping.

board flipping

↓

Cheating.

cheating

↓

I'm so sick from that cake stuff.

cake sick stuff

↓

Well, you shouldn't have even eaten it, man,

eaten

↓

'cause the game's gonna be over in a second.

games second

↓

They're gonna kill us.

kill

↓

Hold on a second.

second

↓

I got a plan.

plan

↓

When I was in the cage, I had the book.

book cage

↓

Save it, Frank.

frank save

↓

There's no way we can beat them, okay?

beat

↓

They are tailor-made for level three.

level level-three tailor three

↓

Last time we played, Dee got "Emotional Battery."

battery emotional played

↓

We berated that bitch for, like, two straight hours.

bitch hours straight

↓

I mean, really personal stuff.

personal personal-stuff stuff

↓

Way over the line.

line

↓

The kind of stuff that cuts you to the core, you know?

core cuts stuff

↓

She held it together without a single tear.

held single single-tear tear

↓

Dude, when her two minutes were up, she cried for a month straight.

cried minutes month straight

↓

- Yeah, it was really sad. - Every day, crying all day long.

crying

↓

She talked about taking too many pills.

pills talked

↓

I think she tried to kill herself.

kill tried

↓

She did, she did.

↓

I saw it, but I didn't tell you about it.

↓

Are you bitches ready for round three?

bitches ready round three

↓

'Cause you're going down, clowns.

clowns

↓

Dennis, I want to tell you something.

dennis

↓

- Yeah? - I hope I get "emotional battery"

battery emotional hope

↓

this time from them,

↓

because this is why...

↓

You guys, you always emotional batter me.

batter emotional

↓

And I'm gonna... I'm fine with it.

↓

I don't care about it. I'm getting good at it now.

care

↓

So that's something that I hope for this game.

game hope

↓

- Okay. - Let me help you with that.

↓

- Oh, Frank. - Frank, come on!

frank frank-frank

↓

Okay, so I broke another rule.

another broke rule

↓

- Oh, you did? - Oh, you broke a rule?

broke rule

↓

Don't rat us out if it's a rule!

rule

↓

Probably not a rule. Let's keep playing.

playing rule

↓

- It probably is a rule. - I don't think it's a rule.

rule

↓

- I think it is. - Rule 463...

rule

↓

"When a player spills his or her drink,

drink player

↓

his or her team has to chug the opponents' drinks."

chug drinks team

↓

You are a terrible,

↓

- terrible teammate. - I don't want to chug

chug teammate

↓

hard alcohol on top of all this wine.

alcohol hard hard-alcohol wine

↓

- It's like... - No, that's okay.

↓

- You don't have to do it. - You don't have to,

↓

because you guys are in level one.

level

↓

You can't even drink hard alcohol anyway.

alcohol drink hard hard-alcohol

↓

They're trying to trick us, 'cause then we'll not drink it,

drink trick

↓

and it'll be a rule that we had to drink it.

drink itll rule

↓

- We're playing the game. - No, no, it's fine.

game playing

↓

No tricking us. We're playing the game.

game playing tricking

↓

- We're playing the game. - It's Chardee MacDennis.

chardee chardee-macdennis game macdennis playing

↓

This tastes like water.

tastes water

↓

- This is water. - Aha!

water

↓

I knew it!

↓

- Well... - I knew it was water.

water

↓

When he threw his beer in my face, I could taste it.

beer face taste threw

↓

Shut up, dog!

↓

- Cheaters! Cheaters! - Yeah, cheaters.

cheaters

↓

- You've been cheating! - We caught you cheating!

caught cheating

↓

Eff you in the "A"! Eff you in the "A"!

↓

Eff you in the "A"!

↓

- Congratulations, all right? - Fudge on crackers, all right?

congratulations crackers fudge

↓

- Mr. Falconing sons of birds. - Motherfathers,

birds sons

↓

you've caught us cheating

caught cheating

↓

for the first time in, like, 18 games.

games

↓

If the team ahead gets caught cheating,

ahead caught caught-cheating cheating team

↓

then the team behind jumps to their level, which means...

behind jumps level team

↓

- Level three! - Level three!

level level-three three

↓

Level three!

level level-three three

↓

- Okay. - We've never been to level three before.

level level-three three

↓

I'm going to level three! I'll see you in level three!

level level-three three

↓

Yep, yep, yep, yep.

↓

We're going to level three

level level-three three

↓

We are the team going to level three

level level-three team three

↓

That was the buzzer.

buzzer

↓

Oh.

↓

The timer's never gone off before.

gone timers

↓

So what does that mean?

↓

Wait, look that up, because you guys always win before the timer goes off so.

timer

↓

It means we have to draw the black card.

black black-card card draw

↓

I don't remember a black card.

black black-card card remember

↓

- There's a black card? - What's the black card?

black black-card card

↓

- I don't remember. - I don't remember

remember

↓

- a black card at all. - Black.

black black-card card

↓

Guys, this could be some dark shit right here.

dark

↓

- Here it is. - This is gonna be a battle to the death.

battle death

↓

Ooh!

↓

- Oh, that's scary. - All right, read it.

read scary

↓

Open it, open it, open it, open it!

open

↓

Brace yourself. Get ready.

brace ready

↓

- Here I go. - Huh?

↓

- What do we... Why... - I don't know.

↓

- I don't know. - Read it.

read

↓

"In the event of a tie, a winner must be chosen.

chosen event must winner

↓

There can be only one.

↓

And so it comes to this.

comes

↓

Flip...a... coin."

coin flip

↓

Flip a goddamn coin?

coin flip goddamn

↓

- That's what we came up with? - Flip a coin.

coin flip

↓

That's lame as shit.

lame

↓

Oh, now I remember. When we were writing the rules,

remember rules writing

↓

at one point, we just got really bored, and we phoned it in.

bored phoned point

↓

That is so lame!

lame

↓

No, it's awesome.

awesome

↓

Think about this, Mac.

↓

They can't out-cheat us, they can't outsmart us.

cheat

↓

This isn't about, like, physical endurance or anything like that.

endurance physical

↓

This is just up to the gods right now, Mac!

gods

↓

And there's a 50-50 chance we're winning this whole thing, right now.

chance whole winning

↓

No.

↓

- Tails never fails. - Tails never fails!

fails tails

↓

- Tails never fails. - Tails never fails.

fails tails

↓

Frank, we're taking tails!

frank tails

↓

- All right, all right, just flip the coin. - All right.

coin flip

↓

Flip that coin. Flip that coin! Flip that coin!

coin flip

↓

Flip that coin!

coin flip

↓

Flip that coin!

coin flip

↓

Flip that coin!

coin flip

↓

Yes!

↓

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

↓

Ah! That felt good.

↓

Losers.

losers