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Home » It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia » S11E05 — Mac & Dennis Move to the Suburbs

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Season 11, Episode 5 — Mac & Dennis Move to the Suburbs

TMDB episode metadata

Show: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Episode title: Mac & Dennis Move to the Suburbs

Air date: February 03, 2016

Director: Todd Biermann

Top billed cast: Charlie Day, Glenn Howerton, Rob Mac, Kaitlin Olson, Danny DeVito

Mac and Dennis move to the suburbs for cheaper rent but find it hard to adjust.

Source: TMDB

↓

Hey, Dee! Dee! Dee! Dee!

↓

Do you want to take your feet off my bed, please?

feet

↓

It's not your bed, okay? It's my goddamn floor!

floor goddamn

↓

And how many times do I have to ask you guys

times

↓

to please just pick up your shit when you wake up in the morning!

morning pick wake

↓

You're turning this place into the Superdome.

place turning

↓

Superdome? That's, like, six years too late.

late years

↓

That's a super lame reference. And it's kind of offensive.

lame offensive reference super

↓

You'll be happy to know, by the way, we are looking for a place right now.

happy looking place

↓

All right? What about this place, man?

place

↓

Ah, it looks a little bit junky. It kind of reminds me of here.

reminds

↓

Yeah, this place is a piece of…

piece place

↓

It's not junky, okay? You guys have destroyed everything,

destroyed

↓

and that's why it looks junkier, like a couple of locusts.

couple

↓

Oh, I take that as a compliment.

compliment

↓

- It's not a compliment. - Well, it's biblical,

compliment

↓

- so it's a compliment. - Yeah.

compliment

↓

Why is everything so goddamn expensive?

expensive goddamn

↓

I mean, I wish we hadn't burned down

burned wish

↓

our rent-controlled apartment.

apartment controlled rent

↓

Yeah, you think?

↓

Dee, I will slap you in the teeth.

slap teeth

↓

You think this is easy? We have a list of demands here.

demands easy list

↓

We need two bedrooms. We need two bathrooms, minimum.

bathrooms bedrooms minimum

↓

You know what? Whatever. What's your plan?

plan

↓

Where are you guys gonna find a place that fits

fits place

↓

all of your needs for under 1,500 bucks a month?

bucks month needs

↓

Well, guys, this is it.

↓

Welcome to our beautiful new home.

home welcome

↓

This is crazy. You guys should've just

crazy shouldve

↓

moved into that empty apartment in our building.

apartment building empty moved

↓

The one where the family was murdered?

family murdered

↓

Brutally murdered.

brutally murdered

↓

- Pass. - This place is awesome.

awesome pass place

↓

You guys are gonna thrive out here, and I am not gonna have

thrive

↓

to worry about you hogging my shower anymore.

anymore hogging shower worry

↓

And we don't have to worry about getting ringworm.

ringworm worry

↓

You brought the ringworm.

brought ringworm

↓

Yeah, and now your apartment is infested with it.

apartment infested

↓

Don't worry, you'll be back to giving each other worms soon enough.

giving worms worry

↓

These are city scum. They can't hack it out here.

city hack scum

↓

- Oh, yeah? - Yeah.

↓

- You want to bet? - Absolutely.

absolutely

↓

Okay, Frank. So if Mac and I can live here for a month,

frank live month

↓

then you have to pay our rent for an entire year.

entire rent

↓

Deal. And if you don't,

deal

↓

you have to sleep in bed with an old man for a year.

sleep

↓

- Gross! - What?

gross

↓

What the hell are you laughing about, Charlie?

charlie laughing

↓

You already sleep with an old man,

sleep

↓

and for no reason other than you seem to enjoy it.

enjoy reason

↓

Yeah.

↓

Okay, you know what, Frank? You got a bet.

frank

↓

Won't last a month. Frank is insane!

frank insane month

↓

This place is paradise, man.

paradise place

↓

- We can really stretch out, you know? - It's quiet, it's calm.

calm quiet stretch

↓

It's not like the city where everything is so stressful, you know?

city stressful

↓

I'm just… I feel at ease.

ease

↓

When was the last time that we had a home-cooked meal?

cooked home meal

↓

Oh, dude…

↓

It's been forever.

forever

↓

Well, my friend, dig in.

friend

↓

Mmm.

↓

Oh, my God.

↓

Mac…

↓

this is incredible.

incredible

↓

- You like it? - Oh, my God.

↓

Oh, that is such a relief because I worked so hard on it.

hard relief worked

↓

Yeah.

↓

I call it Mac's famous mac and cheese.

cheese famous macs macs-famous

↓

Okay, well, I don't know how…

↓

I don't really know how famous it is.

famous

↓

I mean, I'm your roommate, and I've never heard of it.

heard roommate

↓

So, what do you want to do after dinner?

dinner

↓

Uh… Well, see, the TV's not hooked up,

hooked

↓

so can't watch TV.

watch

↓

Um, there's not really any bars around here, so…

bars

↓

Right.

↓

- You know what we should do? - Hmm?

↓

Let's just get a good night's sleep.

nights nights-sleep sleep

↓

- That's a good idea. - Yeah.

idea

↓

Yeah.

↓

What was that?

↓

What was what?

↓

You hear that, that chirping sound?

chirping sound

↓

I did not, no.

↓

Probably a smoke detector or something like that, huh?

detector smoke

↓

Right, yeah. No big deal.

deal

↓

Hey, to a great night's sleep.

nights nights-sleep sleep

↓

- Good morning. - Mm.

morning

↓

- Hey, man, did you hear that… - Pool filter?

filter pool

↓

Oh, my God. It was like a jet engine.

engine

↓

I didn't get any sleep at all last night, you know?

night sleep

↓

One noise is so much louder

louder noise

↓

than all the city noises combined, you know?

city combined noises

↓

- You just, you fixate. - Totally.

↓

I get that, but I was actually talking about that chirping sound.

chirping sound

↓

Did you hear that? It was, like, happening all night.

night

↓

No, I didn't hear that.

↓

Oh, man, it was driving me nuts.

driving nuts

↓

- Yeah. - Anyway, want to roll?

roll

↓

I, uh, got us some music. I made this Creed mix.

music

↓

Oh, uh, Creed, huh?

↓

Yeah, it's a long commute, so…

commute

↓

Yeah, I was thinking more, like, Bryan Adams.

adams bryan thinking

↓

- Okay. But it is Tuesday. - Yeah…

tuesday

↓

- Which is technically my music day. - Right.

music technically

↓

Yeah, and that was cool and all when it only took us,

cool

↓

like, ten minutes to get to work, but now we're looking

looking minutes

↓

at, like, an hour or so commute.

commute hour

↓

I'm thinking maybe more my thing.

thinking

↓

But, hey, you know what? Here's an idea.

idea

↓

Why don't you take a personal day?

personal

↓

You know, I mean, we got a lot of property here.

property

↓

It might be nice to have someone here to look after it.

might

↓

You know, maybe get that TV working.

working

↓

Maybe take a run at that, uh, pool filter?

filter pool

↓

- Huh? - Hey!

↓

You must be the new neighbors.

must neighbors

↓

Name's Wally Schmidt.

names schmidt wally

↓

No relation to Mike.

mike

↓

But don't tell my wife.

wife

↓

Boy, it sure is a hot one today, huh?

today

↓

Okay.

↓

Nice to meet you boys.

boys meet

↓

What the hell was that all about? Just comes up and starts talking to us?

comes starts

↓

Right, some guy comes up to me, I don't know what he's…

comes

↓

- I don't know what he's up to. - No. It's like, the whole time,

whole

↓

I'm staring at him, I'm thinking, does he have a knife?

knife staring thinking

↓

Are we gonna have to take this bitch out right now?

bitch

↓

- No. I don't know. - I don't know.

↓

But it's the city, though.

city

↓

It's forced me to develop these sharp edges.

develop edges forced sharp

↓

For protection, you know? I got to smooth them out.

protection smooth

↓

- We're in the suburbs. - Let's work on it a little bit.

suburbs

↓

- Okay, all right. - Shall we?

↓

You know, 'cause now I'm all tense.

tense

↓

I don't want to bring this energy into work, you know?

bring energy

↓

Luckily, I got the commute to relax.

commute luckily relax

↓

* Bought it at the five and dime… *

bought dime five

↓

Aw, merge, merge! You had your…

merge

↓

Come on, you have to seize the goddamn gap!

goddamn seize

↓

People are so goddamn inefficient!

goddamn

↓

Oh, goddamn it!

goddamn goddamn-it

↓

I don't care if you're old! Seize the gap!

care seize

↓

You old fat bitch!

bitch

↓

You fat bitch!

bitch

↓

- So, how was your day? - Good.

↓

How was work? Any good stories?

stories

↓

Charlie and Frank are doing something with Russian hats now.

charlie frank hats russian

↓

- Really? What? - I don't know.

↓

I couldn't follow any of it. What did you do today?

follow today

↓

Did you, uh, fix that pool filter?

filter pool

↓

Uh, I tried.

tried

↓

But it turns out it's actually really complicated,

complicated turns

↓

and I didn't go to school for that, you know?

school

↓

Mostly I just tried to get the living room set up.

living living-room mostly room tried

↓

It took a little while to find a stud.

stud

↓

Yeah, I can, I can see that.

↓

Maybe, uh, take another personal day tomorrow, huh?

another personal tomorrow

↓

You know, maybe I will take another run at that pool filter.

another filter pool

↓

Maybe try and do all the other things that you tried to do today,

today tried

↓

but, uh, you know, do them.

↓

Shut up, shut up, shut up,

↓

Shut up!

↓

Aw, damn it!

↓

What is that?

↓

* Played it till my fingers bled *

bled fingers played till

↓

* Was the summer of '69… *

summer

↓

What's your plan, huh?

plan

↓

Two miles an hour. There you go.

hour miles

↓

Oh, gun it. Use your signal, you cow!

signal

↓

Goddamn it.

goddamn goddamn-it

↓

Unbelievable.

unbelievable

↓

I don't see what the problem is.

problem

↓

Hey. Hey, hey!

↓

Slow down!

slow

↓

Children play here, you fat cow!

children

↓

Hey, Wally.

wally

↓

Oh, hey.

↓

Hot one today, huh?

today

↓

Yeah?

↓

Oh, that Wally loves to say "It's a hot one"

loves wally

↓

when I already know it's a hot one.

↓

'Cause I'm standing outside in the hot one.

standing

↓

Thanks a lot, Wally.

thanks wally

↓

You know what? Tell me about future weather.

future weather

↓

Don't tell me about present weather…

present weather

↓

Oh, I didn't realize we had company.

company realize

↓

Hey, Dennis.

dennis

↓

This is Jimmy, he's the pool guy.

jimmy pool

↓

I invited him over for dinner.

dinner invited

↓

Mac, can I speak to you in the foyer for a second?

second speak

↓

Oh, uh…

↓

Sure.

↓

Excuse us for a second.

excuse second

↓

Just be a…

↓

Just be a quick minute here.

minute quick

↓

Hey. What?

↓

Come on, man. You gonna invite some guy

invite

↓

over to my house that I don't even know.

house

↓

I just wanted to have, uh, somebody over for dinner.

dinner somebody wanted

↓

So I got to have dinner with some guy, "Hey, pool guy."

dinner pool

↓

His name is Jimmy!

jimmy name

↓

Jimmy? I don't give a what you do.

jimmy

↓

You could ask him about all sorts of things. I mean…

sorts

↓

What do you want me to ask pool guy?

pool

↓

If he knew shit that I was interested in,

interested

↓

he wouldn't be a pool guy.

pool

↓

I said I was sorry.

↓

Yeah, yeah. No, I'm just, uh…

↓

I'm just confused, you know, I…

confused

↓

Here I am thinking that we got a pool that's outside.

pool thinking

↓

Eh… I didn't realize that we had an indoor pool.

pool realize

↓

Can we just forget about it and eat our dinner?

dinner forget

↓

It's just so funny. We got enough money for two pools.

funny money pools

↓

And yet we don't have enough money for a recipe book,

book money recipe

↓

'cause here we are eating mac and cheese again.

cheese eating

↓

You don't know how hard it is

hard

↓

to be cooped up in here all by myself, okay?

↓

At least you get to go to work.

least

↓

- I get to go to work? - Yes.

↓

Oh, everybody, hey, I "get" to go to work.

everybody

↓

I "get" to have a job.

↓

I "get" to have to make money for us.

money

↓

Oh, my… You know what, screw this.

screw

↓

Oh, oh, yes. Fine, just walk away right in the middle…

middle walk

↓

Dennis!

dennis

↓

Goddamn it. What is that?

goddamn goddamn-it

↓

- Son of a bitch. - What?

bitch

↓

- Son of a bitch. - The hell you doing?

bitch

↓

Oh, do you hear it, too?

↓

I heard you bashing.

bashing heard

↓

Yeah, yeah, that chirping? I'm pretty sure it's a cricket.

chirping cricket

↓

Okay, you know what, I'm gonna say something here,

↓

and it might not be popular, but…

might popular

↓

- I hate this place. - Yes.

hate place

↓

And I got to get back to the city. I'm going nuts.

city nuts

↓

I miss the city, too. I miss the action.

action city miss

↓

You know, I thought this place would soften my edges,

edges place soften

↓

but they're sharper than ever.

↓

Dude, I cannot be cooped up here.

cannot

↓

You know, cooking and cleaning and fixing.

cleaning cooking fixing

↓

All right, all right, calm down, calm down.

calm

↓

I… I think I have an idea.

idea

↓

Let's invite the gang over.

gang invite

↓

You know, we'll clean up the place, we'll serve 'em a nice dinner,

clean dinner place serve

↓

we'll show 'em how well we're doing,

↓

and I'll feel Frank out about this bet, you know,

frank

↓

which in retrospect is completely ridiculous.

completely completely-ridiculous ridiculous

↓

How are they gonna find an old man that's gonna go along with it?

along

↓

Right. Exactly.

↓

Mac and Dennis, old man.

dennis

↓

Old man, Mac and Dennis.

dennis

↓

So, uh, what's with the hats?

hats

↓

I… You wouldn't get it.

↓

Yeah, you kind of had to be there, man.

↓

Hey, how about that food, huh?

food

↓

Mac calls it "Mac's famous mac and cheese."

calls cheese famous macs macs-famous

↓

And it is famous.

famous

↓

In my stomach.

stomach

↓

Is it? I mean, we're your friends, I've never heard of it.

friends heard

↓

Hey, guys.

↓

We are having so much fun at this house.

fun having house

↓

I'll tell you, I can't believe we ever lived anywhere else.

believe lived

↓

But I was just curious, if we were to lose this bet,

curious lose

↓

what would the logistics be, like, with the old man thing?

↓

Oh. Well, I'll tell you what I'll do.

↓

If you guys are cracking, you can forfeit now,

cracking forfeit

↓

I'll buy the three of youse a California king-size bed

california king king-size size three youse

↓

- to sleep in. - What?

sleep

↓

No, they're not gonna forfeit. This place is rad.

forfeit place

↓

You want a little side action?

action side side-action

↓

No, no, no, don't muddy this with side action. Dee, don't do it.

action muddy side side-action

↓

- I'll take some side action. - Don't…

action side side-action

↓

Tell you what. How about, if they win,

↓

I'll take that California king bed for myself.

california king

↓

Fine, and if they lose,

lose

↓

the three of you got to sleep with the old man.

sleep three

↓

Fine. Deal.

deal

↓

Excuse me.

excuse

↓

I have to piss.

piss

↓

Out of my penis.

penis

↓

Right.

↓

Okay, well, clearly Mac wants to speak to me in secret.

secret speak wants

↓

Uh, so excuse me.

excuse

↓

- Oh, good, you got my signal. - Yeah, got your signal.

signal

↓

Dude, we're not gonna make it, we're not gonna make it.

↓

Yeah, dude, it's cool, man. We'll figure it out. It's…

cool figure

↓

No, no, it's not cool. There's no way we're gonna make it.

cool

↓

And also, dude, what's with the hats?

hats

↓

- What is with those hats? - Dennis, I got to know!

dennis hats

↓

They told me the story, and it didn't make sense,

sense story

↓

and now we can't get it out of them.

↓

Look, dude, I don't want to sound racist,

racist sound

↓

but can we just discuss the fact that it's an old black man?

black discuss fact

↓

- Yeah, mmm. - It was supposed to be an old man.

supposed

↓

- Just an old man. - Now it's a black man.

black

↓

Dude, that's, like, a whole other thing. That's two things.

whole

↓

That's two things, it's two things.

↓

All right, you know what, let's…

↓

Maybe we just…

↓

We take the California king. I mean, that's a big bed.

california king

↓

You want to share the bed with an old black man?

black share

↓

No, of course not, I… All right, that sounded racist.

course racist sounded

↓

I don't want to share a bed with an old man.

share

↓

I'm just saying it's a big bed, and we could probably work it out.

↓

Okay, so picture big bed, big bed.

picture

↓

Me on the side, you know, you right here.

side

↓

- Old man, right here. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

whoa whoa-whoa whoa-whoa-whoa

↓

Why am I in the middle? Black man should be in the middle.

black middle

↓

Don't call him "black man."

black

↓

His name's not "black man." His name's "old man."

black names

↓

- Let's stick with "old man." - Okay.

stick

↓

Just sounds better. All right, so how about this?

sounds

↓

You and I on the big bed, side-by-side, black man, he's…

black side

↓

- Now you got me doing it. - Mmm.

↓

Old man is down at the bottom, sideways, like a dog.

bottom sideways

↓

Are you calling black people dogs?

black calling dogs

↓

- No, that's not what I… - That's very racist.

racist

↓

What the hell is going…

↓

Oh, my God.

↓

You guys are cracking, aren't you?

cracking

↓

Nah, it's like… fine.

↓

- What? - It's soul-crushing, Dee!

crushing soul

↓

Oh, my God, I can't make this house into a home.

home house

↓

- I didn't go to school for that. - He didn't go to school for it.

school

↓

Well, why did you let me take the side action?

action side side-action

↓

- I told you not to take the side action! - You bitch! You bitch!

action bitch side side-action

↓

Why didn't you yell it so I could hear it?

yell

↓

- I'm tired of yelling. - Damn it.

tired yelling

↓

Now we got to figure out where Dee goes in the bed.

figure

↓

- Oh, right, Dee's got to be in the bed. - Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

dees whoa whoa-whoa whoa-whoa-whoa

↓

I'll tell you exactly where Dee goes, okay?

↓

Dee goes right in the goddamn middle

goddamn middle

↓

of her brand-new California king-size bed

brand california king king-size size

↓

all by herself.

↓

How are we even having this conversation?

conversation having

↓

All you boys have to do…

boys

↓

Guys, all you got to do to win is just exist.

exist

↓

Hey, morning, buddy.

buddy morning

↓

You're up early.

early

↓

Yeah, I'm up early, and I'm feeling great.

early feeling

↓

You know, I was thinking about it, and Dee was right.

thinking

↓

All we have to do is exist here for the next couple weeks,

couple couple-weeks exist weeks

↓

and we win this bet.

↓

So, check this out. I made you that.

check

↓

- "Mac's Honey Do List"? - Yep.

honey list macs

↓

That is a list of chores to give you a sense of purpose,

chores list purpose sense

↓

so you don't feel so cooped up and lonely.

lonely

↓

How's a list of chores going to make me feel less lonely?

chores less list lonely

↓

Well, check out chore number one.

check chore number

↓

"Name the dog."

name

↓

Well, that's so stupid. I don't have a dog.

stupid

↓

You sure about that?

↓

Yeah, positive. I don't have a dog.

positive

↓

I mean, I had Poppins, but he's gone.

gone poppins

↓

- Are you sure? - I don't have a dog.

↓

What do you mean, am I sure? Of course I'm sure.

course

↓

I wouldn't be so sure.

↓

What are you doing?

↓

- Are you okay? - Look behind you, asshole.

asshole behind

↓

- You got me a dog? - Yeah.

↓

Oh, my God, he's so cute!

cute

↓

I mean, he's no Poppins, but…

poppins

↓

Yeah, he's a lot better than Poppins, trust me.

poppins trust

↓

Oh, Dennis, Dennis. I'm gonna name him Dennis.

dennis dennis-dennis name

↓

- Huh? - You're Dennis. He's Dennis Jr.

dennis

↓

Weird. Um, but sure, yeah, that's fine.

weird

↓

Hey, so why don't you go ahead and cross number one off the list there?

ahead cross go-ahead list number

↓

- See how it feels. - Okay, yeah.

feels

↓

Hey, what's a couple weeks between two best friends, right?

best best-friends couple couple-weeks friends weeks

↓

It's whatever we make of it.

↓

So why don't we agree right now

agree

↓

to make these next few weeks the best of our lives?

best lives weeks

↓

- You with me, buddy? - I'm with you.

buddy

↓

I'm gonna raise this guy like he was our own son.

raise

↓

Okay.

↓

Yeah. Weird.

weird

↓

* I remember when *

remember

↓

* I remember, I remember when I lost my mind… *

lost mind remember

↓

No, don't merge, don't merge. We're all… we'll all wait!

merge

↓

We'll all wait for you to send your text!

send text

↓

You fat pig!

↓

How you doing, neighbor?

neighbor

↓

* Does that make me crazy? *

crazy

↓

Shut up!

↓

* Does that make me crazy? *

crazy

↓

I'm not letting you in, pig!

letting

↓

Gonna show up to work, have everybody be like,

everybody

↓

"Why is there blood all over you?"

blood

↓

'Cause I had to slit the guy's throat who causes all the traffic!

causes slit throat traffic

↓

Boy, it sure is a hot one, huh?

↓

* Who do you who do you think you are? *

↓

* Ha-ha-ha, bless your soul *

bless soul

↓

Shut up.

↓

I can't believe it.

believe

↓

Goddamn it! Damn it.

goddamn goddamn-it

↓

I hate the suburbs!

hate suburbs

↓

* I think you're crazy… *

crazy

↓

Hey, buddy.

buddy

↓

Haven't seen you for a bit.

seen

↓

You've probably been staying inside to avoid this, uh, heat wave, huh?

avoid heat heat-wave staying wave

↓

Boy, it's been hot.

↓

It's hot, huh?

↓

Yeah.

↓

It is super hot. Yeah.

super

↓

It's getting real hot around here.

real

↓

So hot, Wally.

wally

↓

But you don't really know what hot is, do you?

↓

Hot's a storm.

storm

↓

You ever been in a storm, Wally?

storm wally

↓

I mean, a real storm?

real storm

↓

Not a thunderstorm, but a storm of fists

fists storm

↓

raining down on your head.

head raining

↓

Blasting you in the face.

blasting face

↓

Pummeling you in the stomach.

stomach

↓

Hitting you in the chest so hard

chest hard hitting

↓

you think your heart's gonna stop.

hearts

↓

You ever been in a storm like that, Wally?

storm wally

↓

Dennis.

dennis

↓

Dennis.

dennis

↓

You okay, dude?

↓

Yeah.

↓

Who you talking to?

↓

No one.

↓

What's that?

↓

Dog grave.

grave

↓

Oh.

↓

Anything exciting happen at work today?

exciting happen today

↓

Uh-uh.

↓

Well, I called up there.

called

↓

They said you weren't even there.

↓

Can we not talk about my day?

↓

Sure.

↓

Perhaps we can talk about my day.

perhaps

↓

And how was your day?

↓

Not great.

↓

You know, with the dog dying and all, but

dying

↓

somehow, old Mac pulled it together.

pulled

↓

He cooked for you, and he cleaned for you.

cleaned cooked

↓

In fact, Dennis, everything I do,

dennis fact

↓

I do for you.

↓

What are you talking about, man?

↓

I'm talking about everything I do, I do for you!

↓

And everything you do, you do for yourself!

↓

Sleeping in your car.

sleeping

↓

Eating at Applebee's.

applebees eating

↓

Were you spying on me?

spying

↓

Don't you turn this around on me.

↓

All you do is think about yourself!

↓

You didn't even notice that I switched up the mac and cheese.

cheese notice switched

↓

Is that what this is about?

↓

The goddamn mac and cheese?

cheese goddamn

↓

Well, yeah, I noticed!

noticed

↓

You put meat hunks in it!

meat

↓

Wow! Hunks of meat! Mmm!

meat

↓

Well, of course Dennis would like Dennis.

course dennis

↓

- What? - It's Dennis!

dennis

↓

What are you talking about?

↓

You're eating the dog!

eating

↓

Oh, God! What is wrong with you?

↓

I don't know! I guess it was just a cry for attention!

attention

↓

You didn't even blink twice when I told you that the dog was dead!

blink dead twice

↓

I can't live with you anymore in this goddamn place.

anymore goddamn goddamn-place live place

↓

I'm out of here. I'm gonna go stay in a hotel.

hotel

↓

Where's my suitcase, Mac?

suitcase

↓

Wait. Wait, wait. Wait, wait.

↓

Dennis, Dennis, Dennis, Dennis, Dennis…

dennis dennis-dennis dennis-dennis-dennis

↓

Tell me about Mac's famous mac and cheese.

cheese famous macs macs-famous

↓

Okay, I can explain.

explain

↓

I called it my famous mac and cheese as a joke.

called cheese famous joke

↓

But then it seemed like you like it.

seemed

↓

You like that it was Mac's famous mac and cheese.

cheese famous macs macs-famous

↓

- And so I just kept saying it. - You're pathetic.

pathetic

↓

You're the one that's sitting at Applebee's

applebees sitting

↓

eating pot stickers all by yourself.

eating stickers

↓

You're the one that's pathetic!

pathetic

↓

Oh.

↓

Well, that must be nosy Wally.

must nosy wally

↓

Coming to see what all the fighting's about.

coming

↓

Well, why don't we show him what all the fighting's about?

↓

- Why don't we show him right now? - Wait, wait, wait!

↓

Dennis, Dennis, calm down!

calm dennis dennis-dennis

↓

Don't you tell me to calm down.

calm

↓

There's that chirping again. How are you not hearing that?

chirping hearing

↓

News flash, asshole!

asshole flash news news-flash

↓

I've been hearing it the entire goddamn time!

entire goddamn hearing

↓

Then why wouldn't you say something?

↓

Because I hate you!

hate

↓

Oh, my God.

↓

- You did it! - Look at this!

↓

- Huh? We did what? - You got this, man.

↓

- In less than a minute… - You're almost there.

less minute

↓

…you guys will have been here a month.

month

↓

- Yep. - We almost…

↓

- We almost won the bet? - Yeah.

↓

- We almost did it! - We almost won the bet?

↓

We're gonna do it! We're gonna win the bet!

↓

- We're gonna win the bet! - Yeah!

↓

Here it is, paid in full, one year's rent.

full paid rent years

↓

Free rent for a year!

free rent

↓

- We did it! We did it! - Free rent for…

free rent

↓

Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

↓

Free rent for where?

free rent

↓

For right here.

↓

Here we go. In five, four,

five five-four four

↓

three, two, one.

three

↓

Hey, guys.

↓

Is he dead?

dead

↓

Yeah, I think so.

↓

Quiet your ass down.

quiet

↓

Sorry, black man.

black

↓

Old man.

↓

Old man. Sorry, old black man.

black

↓

Goddamn it.

goddamn goddamn-it