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Home » I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson » S01E04 — Oh Crap, A Bunch More Bad Stuff Just Happened

I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson

Season 1, Episode 4 — Oh Crap, A Bunch More Bad Stuff Just Happened

TMDB episode metadata
Show: I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson
Episode title: Oh Crap, a Bunch More Bad Stuff Just Happened
Air date: April 23, 2019
Directors: Akiva Schaffer, Alice Mathias
Top billed cast: Tim Robinson
A service dog gets super friendsly. Ebenezer Scrooge and the Ghost of Christmas Way-Future. A man takes a bumper sticker way too literally.
Source: TMDB
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[yelling aggressively]
aggressivelyyelling
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[stirring music]
musicstirringstirring-music
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Oh, crap.
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There's only one man who can save us now.
save
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I better get to him before it's too late!
late
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["Big Flame (Is Gonna Break My Heart In Two)" by Doris Wilson playing]
breakdorisdoris-wilsondoris-wilson-playingflameheartplayingwilsonwilson-playing
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[woman] Ladies and gentlemen,
gentlemenladieswoman
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[woman] Ladies and gentlemen,
gentlemenladieswoman
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the president of the Marjorie Caldwell Society of Arts and Music,
artsmusicpresidentsociety
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the president of the Marjorie Caldwell Society of Arts and Music,
artsmusicpresidentsociety
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John Ballgram.
john
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John Ballgram.
john
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Good evening.
evening
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Good evening.
evening
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Tonight, we honor the life and the music of Mr. Herbie Hancock,
hancockherbiehonorlifemusictonight
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Tonight, we honor the life and the music of Mr. Herbie Hancock,
hancockherbiehonorlifemusictonight
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and if we're lucky,
lucky
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and if we're lucky,
lucky
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we might even get him to come up here and play a little music for us.
mightmusic
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we might even get him to come up here and play a little music for us.
mightmusic
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But first, I do want to say, just for anyone who's concerned...
concerned
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But first, I do want to say, just for anyone who's concerned...
concerned
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I don't think the dog that bit me should get put down.
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I don't think the dog that bit me should get put down.
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I know that's protocol when a person falls
fallspersonprotocol
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I know that's protocol when a person falls
fallspersonprotocol
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and a dog bites them, the dog gets put down...
bites
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and a dog bites them, the dog gets put down...
bites
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but I don't think the dog should get put down,
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but I don't think the dog should get put down,
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because I know that's a service dog.
service
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because I know that's a service dog.
service
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Otherwise, why would it be allowed in here,
allowedotherwise
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Otherwise, why would it be allowed in here,
allowedotherwise
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and why would it be wearing that little blue shirt?
blueshirtwearing
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and why would it be wearing that little blue shirt?
blueshirtwearing
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Okay, I just wanted to say that
wanted
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Okay, I just wanted to say that
wanted
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so it didn't cloud the rest of the evening.
cloudeveningrest
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so it didn't cloud the rest of the evening.
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[audience member coughing]
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[audience member coughing]
audiencecoughingmember
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The year is 1957,
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The year is 1957,
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on the mean streets of Chicago.
chicagostreets
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on the mean streets of Chicago.
chicagostreets
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-My dog didn't bite you. -[murmuring]
bitemurmuring
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-My dog didn't bite you. -[murmuring]
bitemurmuring
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What?
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What?
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-My dog didn't try to bite you. -It didn't what?
bite
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-My dog didn't try to bite you. -It didn't what?
bite
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He was trying to hump your head.
headhump
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He was trying to hump your head.
headhump
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[laughter]
laughter
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[laughter]
laughter
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[Ballgram] It tried to bite me.
bitetried
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[Ballgram] It tried to bite me.
bitetried
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-It tried to bite the back of my hair off. -It was humping you, dude.
bitehairhumpingtried
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-It tried to bite the back of my hair off. -It was humping you, dude.
bitehairhumpingtried
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[laughter]
laughter
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[laughter]
laughter
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Uh...
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Uh...
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Okay, Herbie can play.
herbie
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Okay, Herbie can play.
herbie
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Herbie can compose.
herbie
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Herbie can compose.
herbie
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Herbie sees music in a...
herbiemusicsees
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Herbie sees music in a...
herbiemusicsees
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I'm sorry.
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I'm sorry.
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I'm sorry, but, uh...
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I'm sorry, but, uh...
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What do you even have?
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What do you even have?
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-What? -What do you even have
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-What? -What do you even have
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that you have a service dog that's allowed in here?
allowedservice
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that you have a service dog that's allowed in here?
allowedservice
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-That's really none of your business. -That would be true
business
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-That's really none of your business. -That would be true
business
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if your dog didn't try to bite the back of my hair off.
bitehair
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if your dog didn't try to bite the back of my hair off.
bitehair
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-You know what happened. -I don't.
happened
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-You know what happened. -I don't.
happened
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And it's too bad we can't figure it out 'cause nobody has video or anything.
figurenobodyvideo
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And it's too bad we can't figure it out 'cause nobody has video or anything.
figurenobodyvideo
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I took a video.
video
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I took a video.
video
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[murmuring]
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[murmuring]
murmuring
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Oh... fine.
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Oh... fine.
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-There's no way to watch it. -Tech guy can plug it in right there.
plugtechwatch
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a8dd3dcd-59d1-445b-b712-994431e9eb5b.gif
-There's no way to watch it. -Tech guy can plug it in right there.
plugtechwatch
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[man] Yeah!
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[man] Yeah!
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Thanks, Herbie.
herbiethanks
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Thanks, Herbie.
herbiethanks
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[applause]
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[applause]
applause
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Cool. All right.
cool
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Okay, here I am. Here I am.
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Okay, here I am. Here I am.
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I'm walking up the stage.
stagewalking
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-There I trip a little on the stair. -[laughter]
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-There I trip a little on the stair. -[laughter]
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And here comes a dog trying to bite me.
bitecomes
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And here comes a dog trying to bite me.
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[laughter]
laughter
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[laughter]
laughter
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It's... It's trying to bite me!
bite
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It's... It's trying to bite me!
bite
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It's trying to rip my hair out. What are you laughing at?
hairlaughing
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It's trying to rip my hair out. What are you laughing at?
hairlaughing
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Oh, my God!
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Oh, my God!
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Are you saying that your dog has blue balls now?
ballsblue
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Are you saying that your dog has blue balls now?
ballsblue
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You said it humped me.
humped
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You said it humped me.
humped
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Well, it certainly didn't finish, 'cause look.
certainlyfinish
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-[audience groans in disgust] -It's dry.
audiencedisgustgroans
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-[audience groans in disgust] -It's dry.
audiencedisgustgroans
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And you know what?
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And you know what?
↓
bca8cdff-1271-42c0-89a5-cb3d24fe6834.gif
You don't tape people.
tape
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1176f5ca-596c-411a-aa44-38169c3f826e.gif
You don't tape people.
tape
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ca5f189c-3295-4a55-ad56-881626fbb6b2.gif
What is this society, that we tape everything?
societytape
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What is this society, that we tape everything?
societytape
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What's going on? Do we not live in the moment anymore?
anymorelivemoment
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What's going on? Do we not live in the moment anymore?
anymorelivemoment
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We just tape everything from a phone?
phonetape
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I don't like that.
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You know, that's what Herbie's music is against.
music
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You know, that's what Herbie's music is against.
music
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I don't know, man, I think the dog humped you.
humped
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I don't know, man, I think the dog humped you.
humped
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[laughter]
laughter
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That's why I love Herbie Hancock.
hancockherbielove
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He loves to lie.
loves
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[band instrumental interlude playing]
bandinstrumentalplaying
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["Blending Soul" by Soul Blenders playing]
playingsoul
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We now return to the Channel 20 Christmas classic,
channelchristmasclassicreturn
↓
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The Night Scrooge Saved Christmas.
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[hopeful music playing]
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[music reaches a crescendo]
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Oh!
↓
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It's Christmas!
christmas
↓
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-Scrooge! -[stirring music playing]
musicmusic-playingplayingscroogestirringstirring-music
↓
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-Scrooge! -[stirring music playing]
musicmusic-playingplayingscroogestirringstirring-music
↓
c933883c-5012-4a4c-a94a-c43e848d2a0c.gif
Who are you?
↓
854e02ae-399a-477a-9fee-f9952163b6e1.gif
Who are you?
↓
af686b52-bc48-4bdb-80c6-75cb22037ccc.gif
I am the Ghost of Christmas Way Future.
christmasfutureghost
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I am the Ghost of Christmas Way Future.
↓
42f28e41-ab51-4059-a99e-0700c73fd64b.gif
I've already met the Ghost of Christmas Future.
christmasfutureghost
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I've already met the Ghost of Christmas Future.
christmasfutureghost
↓
dabb0351-73fd-47a3-acc8-42ba64473a9f.gif
I said Way Future, Scrooge!
futurescrooge
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I said Way Future, Scrooge!
futurescrooge
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-What are you here to show me? -Christmas in the year 3050.
christmas
↓
8790db73-cf15-4f01-aa4b-5f89b3159e4a.gif
-What are you here to show me? -Christmas in the year 3050.
christmas
↓
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Skeletrex and his Bone Brigade have enslaved the human race,
bonebrigadehumanrace
↓
fe796f21-38ac-4455-8570-81fcaa050bcc.gif
Skeletrex and his Bone Brigade have enslaved the human race,
bonebrigadehumanrace
↓
d64e748d-f377-4ec5-8831-08c556a0d172.gif
and we need your help.
↓
c05dde87-6c08-43e4-bab0-00bb0b3cf17e.gif
What are you talking about?
↓
339f9de9-5a02-4f6d-9c9a-4f1d1094f55e.gif
What are you talking about?
↓
b02558fc-f335-4ac2-a398-ab69a3c09f8b.gif
Bonies are slaughtering humans by the millions,
humansmillions
↓
7cd2e6a2-e0b6-4dbd-ac3b-849e8d810d5d.gif
taking their bones and using them to make more bone soldiers,
bonebonessoldiersusing
↓
4299d51b-ee49-45b6-bf2a-8cc80f12bfc3.gif
taking their bones and using them to make more bone soldiers,
bonebonessoldiersusing
↓
8f1756ad-7a84-43f5-a8cd-d61dabc840de.gif
and, more important, fleets of bone cars.
bonecars
↓
b3036178-0b4b-4c5b-9fe8-3b22a15b0015.gif
and, more important, fleets of bone cars.
bonecars
↓
c3b02cf4-6524-4b7f-9b37-3d685c8a1f81.gif
-What--? -Frigging Bonies!
↓
9fab2429-c4ef-4ba8-b316-be41d0b5e317.gif
-What--? -Frigging Bonies!
↓
0a1dcdef-30fe-47da-81d1-02c6e5e4a2bd.gif
But I've got a plan.
plan
↓
1b9aecff-7038-4298-bebe-c8d26597c02b.gif
But I've got a plan.
plan
↓
34cf8369-f375-47fc-b579-e2618ac33a25.gif
We've got to kill Skeletrex.
kill
↓
b10b9996-411a-43ce-a694-42a24b490bb0.gif
We've got to kill Skeletrex.
kill
↓
15aa11be-1b1e-45fd-82be-2fc2b29f5513.gif
He's huge!
huge
↓
3e8f4872-4a33-46c7-a368-b609d77f8f18.gif
He's huge!
huge
↓
0e9d2ba8-d92c-4d3f-a037-53483401fa40.gif
He's 15 feet tall and he has bones the size of tree trunks.
bonesfeetfeet-tallsizetalltreetrunks
↓
a514280e-0c7f-48a6-848d-ebd154ded3fe.gif
-What-- -Oh, yeah, I almost forgot.
forgot
↓
c0bef83c-cc02-40af-ae75-65c4f53cea32.gif
He carries a club made of lava.
carriesclublava
↓
078773e1-b226-453a-9225-a5ba410f884a.gif
He carries a club made of lava.
carriesclublava
↓
424aa7c9-1056-4f35-af1e-1a1ddfb85fc2.gif
-Damn you, Skeletrex! -[gun fires]
fires
↓
dce2613e-69dd-4d3b-ae19-caac4dc850a7.gif
-Damn you, Skeletrex! -[gun fires]
fires
↓
f2d8fd1f-9d86-4f36-842f-3111e2715201.gif
Oh, crap!
↓
ae69cfbf-5c44-4f52-994b-660eec663384.gif
Oh, crap!
↓
a6d44b0b-877b-4f90-814a-a1d474eb2f78.gif
One of the Bonies made it through the Christmas portal.
christmasportal
↓
2905118e-739b-4a62-a51d-bc853a47f185.gif
One of the Bonies made it through the Christmas portal.
christmasportal
↓
6a976e4a-28ad-43b2-aaf4-769acac7d16c.gif
Quick, Scrooge, bash him with your cane!
bashcanequickscrooge
↓
6d15be41-b903-45b0-8c03-71ca5cbd6f09.gif
[skeleton screaming]
screamingskeleton
↓
37c4d1be-88fb-47f0-8ebe-d87a7b648a9c.gif
[skeleton screaming]
screamingskeleton
↓
5f9327b6-4ee3-4786-92e6-34b4efbbd2a9.gif
That's it, Scrooge.
scrooge
↓
dd4fe65f-ae43-4965-aa84-c36f00f656c6.gif
Now, go ahead and eat that goop, Scrooge.
aheadgo-aheadscrooge
↓
feefa329-9d2f-47ee-a59c-f1043a4d7944.gif
Now, go ahead and eat that goop, Scrooge.
aheadgo-aheadscrooge
↓
a883c2f3-33ad-4cb4-990a-3a7efcc50a28.gif
It'll give you the Bonie's sense of humor.
humoritllsense
↓
fa99ff0b-9cbe-4290-b5f5-7e55c7b9b3bc.gif
Don't let it lay an egg!
↓
790ad72e-29a8-4068-8c2a-3991a6003ec9.gif
Don't let it lay an egg!
↓
06909537-ac82-4fda-94c0-427fdaa75044.gif
[Scrooge] I don't know what to do!
scrooge
↓
f3daf553-7007-42e0-9e90-697201f28e27.gif
Use your Christmas cheer and bash its fricking brains out, you idiot!
bashbrainscheerchristmaschristmas-cheerfrickingidiot
↓
fe3bf7d6-e23a-403c-94ac-f3f25f7b555e.gif
-[soldier laughs] -[bone larva moans]
bonelaughsmoanssoldier
↓
f2a80031-f33b-44b8-a57b-3769ed585f56.gif
-[soldier laughs] -[bone larva moans]
bonelaughsmoanssoldier
↓
25526c97-8987-4d06-b059-2d43f40fea30.gif
Yeah, bash that bone larva!
bashbone
↓
e9f967cf-3d2d-457c-b3c3-3427a8827547.gif
Yeah, bash that bone larva!
bashbone
↓
773c8127-44b1-4f91-ae5e-9db4d367964b.gif
Attaboy! That's good bone-crushing.
attaboybonecrushing
↓
f61191d7-a83a-4d5e-aec2-e22460cf22ee.gif
Attaboy! That's good bone-crushing.
attaboybonecrushing
↓
833f2f5c-c1ec-42ff-987a-28df38e994d0.gif
[hopeful music playing]
hopefulmusicmusic-playingplaying
↓
94f98c29-a3d5-4d61-8042-54858d8f837a.gif
I think I'm beginning to get the hang of this.
beginninghang
↓
dd1965c3-f70e-4434-8534-5b13e8f39e9a.gif
I think I'm beginning to get the hang of this.
beginninghang
↓
f5831c68-4395-4a18-ba86-3c5636f4a03a.gif
Scrooge, you cheap bastard, you're a genius at this.
bastardcheapgeniusscrooge
↓
55ac6bc4-6986-4067-9c89-3cef9cb395e6.gif
The Bone Brigade is doing a bunch more bad stuff.
bonebrigadebunchstuff
↓
a31eab6a-0aa9-411d-b9d3-0727ac9aa150.gif
We're gonna have to go to the future.
future
↓
9aaf50f2-52ce-45bf-847d-0ed89cbca24e.gif
We're gonna have to go to the future.
future
↓
3e971ed5-f9ad-484a-baee-466dfb0d71ee.gif
Crap dang it, this sucks!
dangsucks
↓
3379b643-d74b-43c2-bd25-0e3385072eb7.gif
Crap dang it, this sucks!
dangsucks
↓
a3f07976-6cce-47d6-b220-9142080f29af.gif
♪ Baby, baby, baby, baby, ba-ba-bay ♪
baby
↓
5c02b99d-06c7-430d-8a65-870b7367e9f5.gif
♪ Whoa, baby, baby, ba-ba-bay ♪
babywhoa
↓
470d6954-d954-45e3-a11d-854e376dc85c.gif
So do you like it out here?
↓
24d30b31-e26f-4172-b88b-20e0ac0165f8.gif
So do you like it out here?
↓
4d0825bf-c6b7-4528-af4f-dcfbbdd533fe.gif
You know, coming from the Midwest, I was unsure
comingmidwest
↓
28160ce9-1d67-4177-813b-5823281e171b.gif
You know, coming from the Midwest, I was unsure
comingmidwest
↓
ae243b1e-d221-4a0d-bf75-df2b3f398a66.gif
-whether I'd like California or not. -Yeah.
californiawhether
↓
e69dee41-7856-49cd-9455-f17938b8f781.gif
-whether I'd like California or not. -Yeah.
californiawhether
↓
466dbdb0-64cb-4cd5-8ecc-707d27ef156d.gif
But I got to say, I love it.
love
↓
278b6691-15f9-4812-b36c-9b16c68a19b8.gif
But I got to say, I love it.
love
↓
23349de3-f9b9-4eca-86a6-a30d26948ca4.gif
You know? The weather, obviously. -[woman] Mm-hm.
obviouslyweatherwoman
↓
c00efe19-723d-4b87-b535-9b98667dc38e.gif
You know? The weather, obviously. -[woman] Mm-hm.
obviouslyweatherwoman
↓
0823d374-44fc-4a01-9cd0-42390af45987.gif
[man] It doesn't get any better.
↓
034abe37-c866-4b55-bac0-49b0bf67a8bf.gif
And you think I'd miss the seasons...
missseasons
↓
7d9474a1-835e-4a0c-be59-7bee33931f62.gif
And you think I'd miss the seasons...
missseasons
↓
19ce9bac-2935-4083-b6a4-7e7f4bba8f28.gif
[woman] Mm-hm.
woman
↓
2e74a81c-43b6-45c0-89ac-3a682a77931e.gif
[woman] Mm-hm.
woman
↓
8c650cec-4949-457e-9020-df418c542ea2.gif
But you know what? Sometimes I do,
sometimes
↓
a58ec5a1-b50d-47a8-acee-4079e8d1e87b.gif
But you know what? Sometimes I do,
sometimes
↓
89f50034-0497-44db-8939-d6c4ffaa2c70.gif
but most of the time, I don't.
↓
4bf4c09a-062a-433a-b6a2-7b18b0b81ee0.gif
[chuckles]
chuckles
↓
c2f01730-8973-451c-9b2f-818d99defc20.gif
[chuckles]
chuckles
↓
3d19b369-9ca2-4b20-ada4-2131a7324d10.gif
-You excuse me for a second? -Mm-hm.
excusesecond
↓
cbc2b9e5-18d4-4bb2-8b19-a7bcc3e63dad.gif
Can I talk to you for a second?
second
↓
1002aa89-24dc-4681-ad4c-1c7b48ef17dd.gif
How can I help you?
↓
f0e68853-5709-4b7d-b268-dcde3e0898f9.gif
My date's eating all the fully loaded nachos.
dateseatingfullyfully-loadedloadednachos
↓
22e4355c-55dd-4df9-b4a0-bba476fba162.gif
All the ones with the meat and cheese,
cheesemeatones
↓
8a3c0eb5-b251-4888-84eb-19e820185986.gif
the ones that are fully loaded, she's hogging them,
fullyfully-loadedhoggingloadedones
↓
ae5d0518-b5ff-425e-8f1d-8bbc41717722.gif
so I'm mostly getting just, like, just chips.
chipsmostly
↓
df257ada-716a-4ca2-89b2-80391b31cf9f.gif
so I'm mostly getting just, like, just chips.
chipsmostly
↓
ecefe22d-d0c8-45d8-93f4-7bd3cadbef6c.gif
Like mostly just chips,
chipsmostly
↓
c99dd0f5-25db-48e1-baac-f37b129553c7.gif
like nothing on 'em,
↓
4824f131-26e8-4c9b-ab77-41e17c80c78d.gif
but, like, a little bit of cheese and maybe one little nugget of meat.
cheesemeatnugget
↓
ea3678ae-7dc3-4361-b4b2-a5776482ee1c.gif
-Okay. -Can you say something to her?
↓
2be67b20-ac26-4cc1-8e29-8f7dee283b12.gif
-Say what? -Maybe go up to the table
table
↓
d2873d9f-163b-4dc8-8ebb-d7d909500bec.gif
-Say what? -Maybe go up to the table
table
↓
393d3161-442e-482e-aae4-eea90fdc851a.gif
Or like, "Hey, that's not allowed."
allowed
↓
37549900-9f45-4fec-8b4f-a341a8ea4de8.gif
No, just say the restaurant has a rule.
restaurantrule
↓
7dfcbd39-2853-461c-83c4-fbea357137ad.gif
No, just say the restaurant has a rule.
restaurantrule
↓
e44c6ad9-a4cc-4386-b1bc-c15f8813aa64.gif
It's not you, it's a rule the restaurant has
restaurantrule
↓
0c9a0dcd-e418-4ade-afae-299ddf0f42a0.gif
that if you get an item to share, you can't...
itemshare
↓
f079d69c-d4a2-4ed6-ae08-c60d770bbaa5.gif
One person can't just eat all the fully loaded ones.
fullyfully-loadedloadedonesperson
↓
def3c42c-221c-4636-aad8-df27903f22ba.gif
Like, don't look around, find the one with most meat,
meat
↓
834a6221-a8d2-4923-8c5a-4971ecfbeafb.gif
-and always eat that one. -Can't you just ask her to share with you?
share
↓
d032ace5-df5d-4e91-8a02-0db75eedc035.gif
-and always eat that one. -Can't you just ask her to share with you?
share
↓
cee27574-01dc-4c26-9c11-64f812040024.gif
Can't you just say the restaurant has a rule?
restaurantrule
↓
401fdc2f-2613-4960-9043-fdeb68e09a73.gif
I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I'm like,
↓
0a857991-abc5-4cae-af6f-87e1948163b9.gif
I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I'm like,
↓
8f3a6fc1-cf63-4f86-a035-49338a2716c8.gif
"Play your hits. Like, don't play the new stuff."
hitsstuff
↓
2f229e41-2ed1-4530-ab21-5a75cd56b586.gif
Yeah, I totally agree.
agree
↓
6c227233-3301-4edc-a89d-7ab8919cb7f5.gif
You go to a concert, and you want to hear the songs you love.
concertlovesongs
↓
1a070733-1e22-4e36-96cb-66e4adbe2d76.gif
You go to a concert, and you want to hear the songs you love.
concertlovesongs
↓
77800038-588e-4c7e-a9e9-7658b12d47bf.gif
Right, exactly, like--
↓
252bd652-23b1-455c-b181-6dde0ca02a69.gif
-Give me the good-time rock 'n' roll. -I want to sing along!
alongrockrollsingsing-along
↓
26d7c810-32f7-4dbb-b638-5528dab6ef71.gif
-Give me the good-time rock 'n' roll. -I want to sing along!
alongrockrollsingsing-along
↓
a88f5364-a260-44c5-a79f-af9412b3bae1.gif
[man] Totally!
↓
87d15381-1f48-4e6b-b54a-00c49f05944c.gif
[man] Totally!
↓
ef0b12e9-a3b9-4188-8f79-ffc88035e454.gif
[both laughing]
laughing
↓
75d17343-4e3a-4ccd-8e13-e82a3f04bb06.gif
[both laughing]
laughing
↓
9bcdc1f3-442c-4d9f-a141-ae0d386bcca6.gif
This is really fun.
fun
↓
34d67e95-1792-4e2e-876a-77d875e08d38.gif
This is really fun.
fun
↓
ee124fb1-1909-4066-8461-0874cd97bb84.gif
-This is so fun. -I'm glad we did this.
funglad
↓
53f6d027-b4a7-46ba-8956-17245afa1e72.gif
-This is so fun. -I'm glad we did this.
funglad
↓
5a47582d-4040-4dfc-9796-6c66bd1c02c9.gif
Are you enjoying everything?
enjoying
↓
114729a8-ccc4-4e09-9365-ab8ab679da03.gif
-Yeah, everything's great. -[man] Yeah.
everythings
↓
9540926f-e191-4f7b-b5dd-99d8b0450223.gif
-Yeah, everything's great. -[man] Yeah.
everythings
↓
b93acdbd-e199-414f-b1cc-37d491ec8b70.gif
Uh... Okay.
↓
6284eb6c-8994-43db-9df9-00d0a4685382.gif
Uh... Okay.
↓
653aea06-f81f-4492-88d6-7f62248389f6.gif
Because we have a rule here that if you order nachos to share...
nachosorderruleshare
↓
38c986d5-ba68-4fd1-a0e1-dd273640c899.gif
Because we have a rule here that if you order nachos to share...
nachosorderruleshare
↓
6ac12c67-c9b9-4b3f-b839-10cc7a046355.gif
uh, one person can't just eat all the fully loaded nachos.
fullyfully-loadedloadednachosperson
↓
2e9d7ba2-f2ba-47ae-a763-7b778f2c4a82.gif
What's that? Say that again?
↓
36760d8e-059f-4243-8a24-09d78f3d7c25.gif
What's that? Say that again?
↓
e2c4e32d-6a03-4fdf-883f-09a1a4b515ff.gif
We have a rule that basically says
rule
↓
80a06bf3-bc7b-4ffd-9bee-bb975f0be2ca.gif
We have a rule that basically says
rule
↓
3a969e17-9b78-4dce-9a85-92e04a4f92f7.gif
if two people order nachos to share...
nachosordershare
↓
290557f5-5209-4754-a05b-0cfa3be1d894.gif
if two people order nachos to share...
nachosordershare
↓
0d09884d-4136-4c50-b8c4-95e18abd2add.gif
one person can't take the ones with meat and stuff.
meatonespersonstuff
↓
7e666aea-0e70-49a5-adb8-65dc55dc92dd.gif
What? I've never heard anything like that before.
heard
↓
599c58d1-3e25-4bd2-b52d-76eadee7920d.gif
That is... so weird.
weird
↓
84dd32c6-e31f-485a-b260-a6f105a87b15.gif
That is... so weird.
weird
↓
2ae441ca-0a80-4ae3-b1a0-9c04dafc76ea.gif
But I guess if that's a rule, thanks.
rulethanks
↓
47227b60-cbae-4db8-bf7f-7f7c9a9af7ad.gif
-Okay. -Hang on a second.
hangsecond
↓
4a4e86fb-621f-4aa6-aa01-4cee7511bb65.gif
Did you ask him to come over here and say that?
↓
7dca04ac-5721-4a9c-bb43-b2618bbd9b30.gif
What?
↓
b12d8ef9-af69-4e60-b431-f2c9ecc39c14.gif
What?
↓
650c4e2e-e291-4a50-9d5b-908d1af83b53.gif
Did you ask him to say that?
↓
ca0ac07c-eeee-4057-b3eb-fa04693a0867.gif
Did you ask him to say that?
↓
6e6af55d-8b54-4b4d-bad9-52e482229f21.gif
[tense music playing]
musicmusic-playingplayingtensetense-musictense-music-playing
↓
4b07f81d-87a2-435a-b53f-be01edf731b4.gif
[tense music playing]
musicmusic-playingplayingtensetense-musictense-music-playing
↓
52a81d1e-cf40-4ec6-9341-17260f0b0523.gif
What the hell are you talking about?
↓
e86035df-3712-4b64-92f5-238cdfbb614b.gif
You got up,
↓
4e0a56bb-6875-4c26-829a-22d60cfb36af.gif
You got up,
↓
a8d66dcc-f33e-4b36-a51c-d811882342fe.gif
you talked to him for a long time,
talked
↓
cee41d37-bf76-4b18-94af-0421a9dcf410.gif
and then the minute you sit down, he comes over
comesminute
↓
7897b727-5608-41db-be02-982abf2a98ee.gif
and says that the restaurant has this rule.
restaurantrule
↓
4595d77c-577f-4111-8e92-0e2e014ceddf.gif
No restaurant has a rule about who gets to eat what.
restaurantrule
↓
2678724d-8131-4169-9b78-a466db8a298a.gif
No restaurant has a rule about who gets to eat what.
restaurantrule
↓
c7f1fbad-4f37-490f-aa9d-9216c6b325b1.gif
What?
↓
a57fecc9-c88a-44ca-abd6-09295de73b8e.gif
[in emotional voice] I went up there
emotionalvoice
↓
825f0643-e3db-4bf8-b960-936cecc55661.gif
to ask if we could switch tables.
switchtables
↓
05705b0c-4b2a-4a30-afa8-72fb7fe07d9d.gif
to ask if we could switch tables.
switchtables
↓
81cd882e-07a1-4a23-8c79-41f27b5b6f30.gif
There's an air conditioner above this table,
conditionertable
↓
2360ab1e-cd44-4fcb-927a-4f89d502c5a8.gif
and I was worried you were gonna get cold.
coldworried
↓
2f1a1da1-d836-400e-9f0c-ede8c59bb0fd.gif
and I was worried you were gonna get cold.
coldworried
↓
125f73c8-a5f9-41b9-8e72-6724cca8e21b.gif
There's no vent above us.
vent
↓
a7578124-5f35-43d8-a6e7-3960d87bfdb9.gif
There's no vent above us.
vent
↓
827f4fd3-c86d-483c-bdb9-58934cc5e96d.gif
What?
↓
56178750-4380-433d-a416-422f822220c5.gif
What?
↓
2b769d1b-8fc6-4b2e-a2fb-426f5562f6c3.gif
Did he ask you to come over and say that about the nachos?
nachos
↓
770f7eb8-46a9-43bc-92a2-a4ebb96feae2.gif
Did he ask you to come over and say that about the nachos?
nachos
↓
f4c1b28c-a005-47bc-a3ff-8fb8d526550a.gif
-He did. -What?
↓
af818fc4-4e11-4687-b0ba-b501cdf931cc.gif
-He did. -What?
↓
d28e572d-a227-48bc-a3c9-cb5398182b15.gif
I went up there to complain about the rule.
complainrule
↓
90c91495-246b-43bc-987c-aedf8638b76d.gif
I went up there to complain about the rule.
complainrule
↓
beb46825-815b-44d2-9376-74bd2a317b45.gif
You just learned the rule!
learnedrule
↓
ec965902-8961-4080-a4ea-73a4616ecb9c.gif
You just learned the rule!
learnedrule
↓
46c6c2e2-0e0f-4ff0-9231-6f9883a06b24.gif
-What? -He just came over here...
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9ca1940a-0e12-4da9-8ab4-091d4228866e.gif
-What? -He just came over here...
↓
f82d3b49-8d93-4bc4-bb41-6c7d4563d5d2.gif
-Who? -Him!
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858e47b8-9ae8-411f-b405-330cb3f7f006.gif
What is going on?
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23a93ed0-56ec-466e-b441-c678f97ebd77.gif
What is going on?
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cf53d181-d65a-479b-a74e-ec9e8a552e2a.gif
We'll take the check.
check
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84752ddc-e2a3-4aac-8f6f-00e60126ba1b.gif
We'll take the check.
check
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d2b4b32d-9553-4e14-857b-07235203a52d.gif
We're gonna be so early for that movie.
earlymovie
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631d331b-9be7-4db8-8394-dc94688a1b3c.gif
We're gonna be so early for that movie.
earlymovie
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6f98c381-28b8-475d-bf48-71836fe5556f.gif
I'm not going to the movie.
movie
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a5dc95c9-69a9-4e77-b7b5-53923ed28546.gif
I'm not going to the movie.
movie
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724bda58-f7c0-4773-95e0-f978405b3bf5.gif
[in high-pitched voice] What?
pitchedpitched-voicevoice
↓
3fd055e7-90de-47b3-b4f3-1a98a493022f.gif
["Big Flame (Is Gonna Break My Heart In Two)" by Doris Wilson playing]
breakdorisdoris-wilsondoris-wilson-playingflameheartplayingwilsonwilson-playing
↓
41df6f03-6977-428a-ab07-96bbabaa78f6.gif
["Big Flame (Is Gonna Break My Heart In Two)" by Doris Wilson playing]
breakdorisdoris-wilsondoris-wilson-playingflameheartplayingwilsonwilson-playing
↓
907bdf5b-cbfc-455d-9b64-2dfe1dbb3952.gif
[upbeat music playing on radio]
musicmusic-playingplayingradioupbeatupbeat-musicupbeat-music-playing
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b64e739e-0a69-4457-9b1b-4360296850dd.gif
[upbeat music playing on radio]
musicmusic-playingplayingradioupbeatupbeat-musicupbeat-music-playing
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2a332c63-4af4-48c0-beec-42c40ab8bfc0.gif
[mouths]
mouths
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8f151256-0bc1-4ee0-a040-0cad53b86c3b.gif
[car horn honking continuously]
honkinghornhorn-honking
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298adac4-31d9-4ef6-a722-93ced51c9814.gif
[car horn honking continuously]
honkinghornhorn-honking
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b7d889d1-2756-47d2-bde9-8047a1f453a8.gif
[frenzied driver] That's me!
driver
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d85847b7-4176-4c05-b46d-bff0e2ae65da.gif
Me! That's me! Me!
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74e5384f-988f-499e-96ef-58b0b917fafc.gif
-[continuous horn honking] -[tires screech]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honkingscreechtirestires-screech
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a8dd89b0-b0bd-41e4-b59a-9b0a366c469d.gif
-[continuous horn honking] -[tires screech]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honkingscreechtirestires-screech
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ea0b82d7-4263-4968-9a56-072e0dbc50af.gif
Me?
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5e2ad48b-e7b9-45ea-8757-4df879ad9dcc.gif
Me?
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30ccd60c-2757-4ba1-ba25-7925f5e2bce8.gif
Go around.
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49b7d86c-ae1f-4f4f-b03f-cb4602d2aece.gif
[continuous horn honking]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honking
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1d4648a2-ab83-4dd4-a49e-6c54ed477506.gif
Just go around. I...
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a6165e6e-1567-43a6-a22e-2453d379702b.gif
-[driver panting] -[continuous horn honking]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkingdriverhonkinghornhorn-honkingpanting
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1f1d53a4-759e-434b-bc1d-3ab60d69fe8b.gif
The third phase, we hit up Instagram and--
instagramphasethird
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606fed66-164d-4272-ac34-dd8c97aaf43d.gif
The third phase, we hit up Instagram and--
instagramphasethird
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aee78f03-f097-4859-8fd3-2cbd86942741.gif
[distant car horn honking]
distanthonkinghornhorn-honking
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12830230-277a-4988-982e-4b30ff82e51e.gif
[distant car horn honking]
distant
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5cd04237-efe8-418d-acdb-ee44b18ad65a.gif
Uh...
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e7f17211-2be9-431e-8cbe-6c769aee8ecc.gif
Uh...
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80168be7-be02-4638-b082-fd9e9271aa45.gif
-Um, the third phase, we-- -[distant car horn honking]
distanthonkinghornhorn-honkingphasethird
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d1356d55-b4aa-497b-9dd0-1fb605e05349.gif
[continuous horn honking]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honking
↓
e9698787-e01a-45a9-88e6-5a8b4ae7b45e.gif
[continuous horn honking]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honking
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e05b7e55-0583-4453-878e-dbd293ec513d.gif
Sorry.
↓
a41197db-10bb-4611-89e8-5b4c331543f8.gif
-[continuous horn honking] -[menacing music playing]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honkingmenacingmenacing-musicmenacing-music-playingmusicmusic-playingplaying
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b2aaa166-b715-439b-9479-a84cfe730023.gif
-[continuous horn honking] -[menacing music playing]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honkingmenacingmenacing-musicmenacing-music-playingmusicmusic-playingplaying
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8f1801b6-3b31-4724-96f4-e23e82cf2767.gif
[snarling]
snarling
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9e6dd871-a9af-435f-b290-a550fa57e851.gif
-[dog barking] -[continuous horn honking]
barkingcontinuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honking
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8e9b0c34-60d4-4211-ae98-01cf3f7a6fd7.gif
-[dog barking] -[continuous horn honking]
barkingcontinuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honking
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ca333f90-8a8a-4e77-bcf3-aaa55ddeb336.gif
[frenzied driver] I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!
driver
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70575d8a-bb75-47f9-ad20-687ec46a0ca4.gif
[frenzied driver] I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!
driver
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77b0795a-4c19-4b36-836f-fff07ea5360d.gif
-My stomach hurts! -[continuous horn honking]
continuouscontinuous-horncontinuous-horn-honkinghonkinghornhorn-honkinghurtsstomachstomach-hurts
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d09cca91-03a4-4325-951a-954015a3b258.gif
Help me, please!
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6592c9d4-dbad-4945-9143-957da2a12bdf.gif
[birds chirping]
birdsbirds-chirpingchirping
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0b43b6f5-4c70-4861-a332-4ea640d2d4f7.gif
[exhales]
exhales
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c1065b44-b87a-4bbe-9037-900177e72f56.gif
[man] As painful and sad as today is...
painfultoday
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bf7a050d-ac58-49ce-bb47-b60d8f24c6e9.gif
[man] As painful and sad as today is...
painfultoday
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a4e1d6dc-30ba-49da-a1e5-e5f043509515.gif
let us not forget that it's also a celebration of life.
celebrationforgetlife
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dd0ccf23-5dd4-4408-bbc0-e9155f507319.gif
The life in this world...
lifeworld
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cc9a5c57-c98b-4845-8b60-10827dc8a54f.gif
and the life in our next world, in the ever after.
lifeworld
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2db011fc-2b7b-45c6-b025-7802e02fc015.gif
[car horn honking]
honkinghornhorn-honking
↓
c0705784-a17d-4d7d-8fd3-1e1fcd3bcd6a.gif
The deceased taught us all a lot about life.
deceasedlifetaught
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0564c02d-7533-4eb4-97b6-8c3f2064e477.gif
-[priest's speech drowned out by honking] -Hey! Hey!
drownedhonkingspeech
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5ae1eb3a-6df9-401b-a1dd-080c25e64899.gif
[priest's speech drowned out by honking]
drownedhonkingspeech
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630a2dc5-3671-4cca-ac39-727069d181e2.gif
[priest's speech drowned out by honking]
drownedhonkingspeech
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632475cb-e9db-4cd9-aaa4-59fcd239dc0f.gif
[continuous car horn honking]
continuoushonkinghornhorn-honking
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71cf4757-50e7-43b8-a35b-d9e517326593.gif
Oh, shit! Shit!
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cfe5bd61-3410-4164-aa4e-f8e40ec17156.gif
Shit! Shit!
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Shit! Shit! No! No!
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a65a75eb-db5d-4d01-9681-d6ad33bf3a1d.gif
What the hell are you doing, man? Stop honking.
honking
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37295294-3540-48a8-a6bd-b1a849c57238.gif
But I'm horny!
horny
↓
59aba3b2-3dba-4c2b-a64c-e1456cbf3814.gif
-What are you talking about? -I'm talking about
↓
2e4264c7-eb3e-409e-a0d7-4a8645b6dc01.gif
your "honk if you're horny" bumper sticker!
honkhornysticker
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bbb322e3-0964-4ed5-b498-1df6690dc99d.gif
your "honk if you're horny" bumper sticker!
honkhornysticker
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6100c261-bc42-4299-b886-b43e369bd3c7.gif
Can you help me out or not?
↓
09a90740-6984-4478-aa86-5498e71e7fb8.gif
-How would I help you out? -I don't know! Do you have a solution,
solution
↓
b25499a6-1b7e-475b-9d7f-2493155f3314.gif
-How would I help you out? -I don't know! Do you have a solution,
solution
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176bbc44-f1c5-4731-b40a-341793946ec6.gif
like some magazines, or a calendar, or something?
calendarmagazines
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775c6125-cbec-4931-a454-3c754387c910.gif
like some magazines, or a calendar, or something?
calendarmagazines
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efdee14c-d4b5-47f3-aafa-965ec9da4a4a.gif
-Why would I have that? -What?!
↓
4bbfe44a-6085-44de-88e0-5e4778c09d51.gif
I thought that you worked for a service or a company
companyserviceworked
↓
7e96db2a-c00b-42ca-8c19-97dfbcdacf71.gif
that helped out guys that are so horny
helpedhorny
↓
d87b8150-5dfe-432d-9606-b7bfb8521001.gif
that their stomachs hurt!
hurtstomachs
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df702863-0483-4b85-988f-a5ffef20cda3.gif
'Cause that's what I am!
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ee9b003f-06aa-4780-a69f-595d1e9d35e1.gif
'Cause that's what I am!
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61e2dab4-c3e7-4ebe-8421-813b8274d615.gif
There's no service that does that!
service
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a70465c2-3eaf-490b-9fae-ce2c106a5c28.gif
[yelling in agony]
agonyyelling
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f1626353-7e57-432f-bbae-9c548b16bd57.gif
[yelling in agony]
agonyyelling
↓
526d42d5-e27a-4236-a4ca-12fc62b8b0ab.gif
Stop moving around!
moving
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02a80f38-e4b6-4f77-8a27-8357685f9f28.gif
Stop moving around!
moving
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a865654e-d21b-481f-ba78-beb7d20f585f.gif
Why do you have that sticker on your car? What did you think was gonna happen?
happensticker
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9b6cc227-957a-4800-bf56-a4ea491cbeb8.gif
Why do you have that sticker on your car? What did you think was gonna happen?
happensticker
↓
ebb10292-69f0-4cdf-8261-d88e23d71a88.gif
I don't know why I got the fucking sticker, man!
fuckingsticker
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2c32f163-dbd7-4a90-a1c5-9e62fda57c36.gif
I grew up in a small town.
grewtown
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6c4ab8d5-7b94-4b08-8cdf-c1bb76d8096f.gif
-Things were hard. -[pensive music playing]
hardmusicmusic-playingpensivepensive-musicplaying
↓
95b26644-ddc1-4d47-b399-b45298f9c793.gif
We needed to make little jokes.
jokesneeded
↓
ebe5b0f7-c48e-47ba-8d3a-56a95026761d.gif
I learned to make my car a little funny.
funnylearned
↓
1ff156b5-a79e-4a71-8448-06d20a0fb20c.gif
I'm sorry if I sent the wrong message,
messagesent
↓
5a11f020-879c-4e11-810a-3216ef0e16f2.gif
I'm sorry if I sent the wrong message,
messagesent
↓
05e6e76e-1dae-4a9a-a88c-6f514decceca.gif
like I was some sort of representative or something.
representative
↓
ccfacf9e-5540-430d-b154-0dc7a8f989da.gif
like I was some sort of representative or something.
representative
↓
fc8a2c39-ba8e-44ab-9d46-552ae11f6328.gif
-So you don't have pornos and calendars? -No.
pornos
↓
f944fae5-309a-463f-8aeb-51f9ea59e0a3.gif
Then you need to take that sticker off your car.
sticker
↓
429b4b62-72fd-4430-8353-6cbbba89cc65.gif
Don't you dare! Don't you fucking touch it!
darefuckingtouch
↓
6bba6713-df27-4a62-8bf6-2402b5df09ae.gif
Stay away from my car! It's a classic!
classic
↓
b8e9bf4a-1033-4ef1-8be6-141ce31ef0c3.gif
-Do not touch me! -Don't touch my ride!
ridetouch
↓
20fecd9c-a5b7-4c2f-bd33-c83c43d6659a.gif
-Do not touch me! -Don't touch my ride!
ridetouch
↓
9f32f6b0-a648-41db-9468-51acd4232851.gif
-Ohhh! -Shit!
ohhh
↓
acc0aa7c-43db-4808-98bf-8f4e3e99efdc.gif
-Ohhh! -Shit!
ohhh
↓
8cbe35b9-79c6-4c8a-bae0-bf0c9aaa9ed2.gif
-[driver] What do we got here? -Shut the fuck up!
driverfuck
↓
a88a9b18-9d10-4bcf-ab47-0b66209c6db2.gif
-You had pornos this whole time? -Shut the fuck up. Just pick one and go.
fuckpickpornoswhole
↓
87ca8de0-92e9-47d0-8ab2-9de5d1707eb3.gif
-You had pornos this whole time? -Shut the fuck up. Just pick one and go.
fuckpickpornoswhole
↓
33ed01b2-fb1b-497d-af47-acf8b7cead88.gif
I got to go over there and sing a song.
singsong
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72d6a028-38b2-4f6f-8ca2-fdce8b001e98.gif
I got to go over there and sing a song.
singsong
↓
59111567-be92-4e89-a69a-4d05038141e9.gif
Come on, hurry up!
hurry
↓
737886ae-7bf6-4a3e-9cb1-980c2c5f4899.gif
I've seen a lot of these!
seen
↓
bb440e2c-82dc-4302-9ca1-3fdddf43cc68.gif
-Just take-- -Thank you so much.
↓
c18a24fc-d4f3-497a-b4cd-f443fac4ee8c.gif
Seriously, this is honestly like--
↓
fb089771-c562-4a87-afd8-781fa8dd6e34.gif
-I'm sorry. -I just... I am sorry.
↓
8230619f-11e2-4f75-b198-265c58808531.gif
[inspirational music playing]
inspirationalinspirational-musicmusicmusic-playingplaying
↓
108a253b-6398-4771-9ff6-ca8b892eb641.gif
And now to sing a song, the son of the deceased.
deceasedsingsong
↓
f024250b-1409-4a8a-84a3-df2134dc6712.gif
♪ Friday night ♪
fridayfriday-nightnight
↓
adc63b68-bf1d-4345-899c-55b6b2241cea.gif
I love you, Mom.
love
↓
71b40bc7-6cc9-425f-b9e0-cc7b9405218a.gif
["Big Flame (Is Gonna Break My Heart In Two)" by Doris Wilson playing]
breakdorisdoris-wilsondoris-wilson-playingflameheartplayingwilsonwilson-playing