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Home » Scrubs » S01E10 — My Nickname

Scrubs

Season 1, Episode 10 — My Nickname

TMDB episode metadata
Show: Scrubs
Episode title: My Nickname
Air date: November 27, 2001
Director: Matthew Diamond
Top billed cast: Zach Braff, Donald Faison, John C. McGinley, Sarah Chalke, Judy Reyes, Ken Jenkins
J.D. gains a new nickname - "Scooter" - and Dr. Cox gives Elliot the evil eye when she won't discharge a troublesome patient.
Source: TMDB
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Hey, what are you doing?
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Reading a book about how to tell my roommate
bookreadingroommate
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he drives me crazy, without hurting his feelings.
crazydrivesfeelingshurting
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I think sarcasm works better when it's shorter.
sarcasmshorterworks
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- Fascinating. - Yeah, see there you go.
fascinating
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So what're you doing?
whatre
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- You're annoying me. - I'm okay with it.
annoying
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J.D., I've had such a crappy morning in this hellhole
crappyhellholemorning
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I decided to come out here and eat my lunch.
decidedlunch
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This spot feels secluded. I mean, it's so peaceful.
feelspeacefulspot
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I'm getting my spirit back.
spirit
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- It's just a bench. - Sit down, sweet thang.
benchsweetthang
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Sit down.
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[gulls cry]
gulls
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[waves lap soothingly]
waves
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Nice. You know, I've already eaten, but I could...
eaten
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- Okay, what's it gonna take? - Your cupcake.
cupcake
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This is how I get my spirit back.
spirit
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Mmm-mmm.
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I feel alive again.
alive
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I feel alive again, alive again.
alive
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I feel alive...
alive
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- Morning. - How do you figure?
figuremorning
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- Doing a little drilling, huh? - Yeah.
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Look, I have an idea. Let's try and go the whole day
ideawhole
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without getting in each other's hair.
hairothers
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Just give each other a break? What do you say?
break
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I'm gonna give you a nickname.
nickname
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That's... that's good. I already have a nickname. It's J.D.
nickname
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How about... Whinyface?
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Whinybritches?
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Whinysomething. I definitely like whiny.
whiny
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Whiny dancer.
dancerwhiny
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♪ I'm no Superman ♪
superman
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Oh, I can't believe I went out last night.
believenight
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I thought you said you were exhausted.
exhausted
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I was. But I figured I owed it to the ladies.
figuredladiesowed
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Do you ever stop giving?
giving
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His O2-sat's dropping.
dropping
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I think he just needs respiratory treatment.
needstreatment
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Actually, Carla, I think because of the congestive heart failure,
carlafailureheart
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he just needs Lasix.
needs
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The future of the relationship
futurerelationship
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I'm so proud of you, Bambi.
bambiproud
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They grow up so fast.
fastgrow
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- Dr. Cox. - And there you are.
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Excuse me?
excuse
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I was just now wondering if there's anything
wondering
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that could push my headache into a full-blown migraine.
blownfullfull-blownheadachepush
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And there you are.
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What's the story on the admit in 64?
admitstory
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Oh, she's great. I really like her.
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Let's see if you can't focus on things
focus
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I actually give a rat's ass about.
rats
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- [mockingly mimics him] - What?
mimics
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She blacked out at work. An accelerated heartbeat.
acceleratedblackedheartbeat
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Interesting.
interesting
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I don't care if it wasn't good first-date conversation,
careconversationdate
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Michael deserved to know what I think about circumcising babies.
babiesdeservedmichael
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Over my dead body.
bodydeaddead-body
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What? Actually, no.
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No, it wasn't, which is surprising 'cause he's Jewish.
jewishsurprising
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I gave her two Valium.
valium
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Okay, I'm e-mailing you as we're talking.
mailing
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How cool is that?
cool
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So she's actually sedated as we speak?
speak
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Okay, bye.
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Hey, Elliot. Okay, first impressions.
elliotimpressions
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- Did I scare Michael off? - No.
michaelscare
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Not if he enjoys a big fat cup of crazy.
crazyenjoys
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Ms. Tracy, we're all busy, so if we could get down to business...
businessbusytracy
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My God, I have the exact same e-maily-pagey thingy.
exactthingy
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- Oh, get out! - Oh, my God!
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My H sticks a little bit. Does yours?
sticks
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- It does, it does, it does. - That's so weird.
weird
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Baby, it may just be a bench, but you know what?
babybench
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It's quiet. And I can chill.
chillquiet
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It's like my special place.
placespecial
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You are so damn cute, I can't even stand it.
cutestand
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Serious?
serious
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I love it that my man's all deep and whatnot.
deeplovemanswhatnot
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- You know, I get deep. - I know.
deep
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What's happening, Rerun?
rerun
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What up, Roge?
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How about some of this?
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Oh, come on, it wasn't even that good a show.
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- Take it back. - This second.
second
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Ooh, look at the time. Gotta go, it's lunchtime.
lunchtime
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See ya, baby!
baby
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Are we still on for that Bresson exhibit?
exhibit
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- Yes, we are. - Cool!
cool
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ad938830-b335-4c7d-9aa5-73dedf74dc20.gif
Did somebody just ask out my girlfriend?
girlfriendsomebody
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Do you want to come?
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Black-and-white photography, very artsy-fartsy, no boobies.
blackboobiesphotographywhite
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Hell, no.
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bccc72e5-8903-419b-bf52-3bb7495f58b8.gif
- Hello, sir. - Nice spot.
spot
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60a10a72-b803-4db9-b8e6-7f7dee4abe17.gif
Yes, sir. It is.
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ef3bbb5b-284f-4864-9168-ab976642ef2e.gif
I usually try to get out here for lunch every day at 12:30.
lunchusually
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a1298f3d-c2ba-4f70-be06-4d0d79595aef.gif
- You don't say? - Yep.
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30ed3e4a-8147-4ccb-a2bc-4afbd0837d2d.gif
Every day, 12:30, for 23 years.
years
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Hey, from now on, your name is Scooter.
namescooter
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6f270b58-3534-4a82-8077-ccb2f2bd8d73.gif
- I don't get it. - Short for scooter pie.
scootershort
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I hate scooter pies.
hatepiesscooter
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Oh, now I see.
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You big jerk.
jerk
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Thanks again for the invite, Bambi.
bambiinvitethanks
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- I love photography. - Baby, photography's for studs.
babylovephotography
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[she laughs]
laughs
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Maybe someone spent the morning
morningspent
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Luckily, I was prepared.
luckilyprepared
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- Did you do your pre-rounds? - Yes.
rounds
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Discharge summaries?
discharge
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eab36310-b085-477c-9cc8-58d2dbeabce3.gif
- Pharmacy renewals? - Yes.
pharmacy
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ab4d5036-55c1-4129-8a1a-01498fba2fd6.gif
S.O.A.P. notes? Central line changes?
centralcentral-linechangeslinenotes
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Yes.
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Okay, Janet, but did you go ahead and fix your beeper
aheadbeepergo-aheadjanet
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so it doesn't play that annoying song every time you get paged?
annoyingpagedsong
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- Yes. - [pager beeps]
beepspagerpager-beeps
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- Crap. - [boxing bell]
bellboxing
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I - expect - you - to - act - like -
expect
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a - professional - around - here!
professional
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ea876e64-fa07-4fd0-915f-658bf533f9a6.gif
Is that all you got?
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- Good one. - Whoo! Whoo-hoo!
whoowhoo-whoo
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Interesting tidbit.
interestingtidbit
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Back during the gold rush when a man staked a claim,
claimgoldrush
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if he came upon another man panning his spot,
anotherspot
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why, he could shoot that fella dead
deadfellashoot
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without even asking any questions.
askingquestions
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You don't say.
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ed1eccf8-bc36-477a-bf1e-bba38b7ca190.gif
Simpler times.
simplertimes
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559a31bd-74d1-4cf5-87cd-c83ef1ca4534.gif
Okay, what if you've had three great dates
datesthree
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and he likes you so much
likes
↓
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he hasn't even tried to have sex with you yet?
tried
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I could sabotage that relationship in two phone calls.
callsphonephone-callsrelationshipsabotage
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- I could do it in one. - Sabotage that relationship.
relationshipsabotage
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For starters, I would ask him why he finds me so repulsive.
findsrepulsivestarters
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Then I would coerce him into having phone sex with me,
havingphone
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after which I would ask him if he thinks we have a future,
futurethinks
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and then I'd probably just cry until he hung up on me.
hung
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We are so alike.
alike
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1816ff03-98e5-4a7e-9a51-87be19638c5c.gif
I know!
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9fa7d661-cf93-4b56-b9ec-526da8facf3e.gif
"Oh, stop." "No, you stop."
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Oh, dear God.
dear
↓
b3e84d1a-9156-42f8-b1da-53f11e711bbc.gif
- Ms. Tracy, we'll go ahead... - Can you give me one sec?
aheadgo-aheadtracy
↓
f2b3827c-6465-42bc-bf5c-7e71d37e07c1.gif
I'm on The Zone. I'm trying to arrange to have food delivered.
arrangedeliveredfoodzone
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Fatty had a party and nobody came.
fattynobodyparty
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- Preaching to the choir. - [whistles]
choirwhistles
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Okay, think of what little patience I have
patience
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a08d4925-5004-4814-a826-ea8bc5986292.gif
as, oh, I don't know, your virginity.
virginity
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You always thought it would be there until that night
night
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7524a3a5-d2f2-4297-863b-57187eb700fc.gif
when you were feeling a little down about yourself,
feeling
↓
6bfd6ab3-0f5a-46ef-b8e0-77a4c9f114d8.gif
and your pal, Kevin, who just wanted to be friends,
friendskevinwanted
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369abf0c-7f9d-41d6-aaed-5a8b9fa6c354.gif
well, he dropped by and he brought a copy of
broughtcopydropped
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About Last Night and a four-pack of Bartles & Jaymes.
fournightpack
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And ba-dow! [laughs]
laughs
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499b1d17-ad67-46cf-88f4-2ec224b53de3.gif
It was gone forever.
forevergone
↓
82d2acc7-9bb7-40eb-8b7d-412f52a5f43d.gif
Just like my patience is now.
patience
↓
e954865a-a461-447b-b6c4-966c2006da65.gif
So you do scary little speeches?
scaryspeeches
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45218e09-7ce3-4dbd-afc2-e4c6b58b5e15.gif
How adorable!
adorable
↓
49a1ba00-2f4c-4d3e-b1b4-1521895ad36f.gif
This is so much fun.
fun
↓
c1fb0a9d-7de3-43e1-a64a-996f254db3ca.gif
Careful, Rapunzel.
careful
↓
0dd2dff7-9b9c-46ba-abf4-1dde602aa0e9.gif
- Oh. - Fun time is officially over.
funofficially
↓
d14571c3-3ca8-4f50-be53-de93620b3117.gif
You think you can just treat Bambi like that and walk away?
bambitreatwalk
↓
be956368-89c8-45b6-8b9a-b6d728dc5ae5.gif
Get him, girlfriend.
girlfriend
↓
2888957c-7596-4e94-ace8-79c193a1e4bb.gif
What up, T-Dog?
↓
ac74f08c-dd5f-46bd-a1d0-24b36e446cb2.gif
How you doing?
↓
7e160284-eb29-492c-8401-b39e77c0ff32.gif
Dude, that's totally how my car was rocking
rocking
↓
5cfa4aa3-2302-4070-8034-1b197767e358.gif
when I took this girl out last night.
girlnight
↓
9c71e7ef-eb11-4761-bbd5-321af53e633c.gif
[squeaks]
squeaks
↓
e0a36d4c-3d30-47e0-8c2b-d441b180162b.gif
Am I right?
↓
6c731097-12e2-4235-a6e5-70f0e48061ee.gif
Ah, he earned it.
earned
↓
893cc816-8078-4530-a08f-92c0be2e6cf9.gif
Pain.
pain
↓
06671346-7e02-45d6-81fa-71ee5d1c5937.gif
So Cox tore into you, huh?
tore
↓
039430c8-a3ec-46e1-b4ab-27ced337b8d4.gif
You know what really pisses me off?
pisses
↓
7c77f37e-c85c-4f35-81ca-0c172901fb4d.gif
No one ever calls him on anything, you know?
calls
↓
63141d93-53a1-45bc-afbc-4527c0ea2737.gif
You want to kick and scream while teaching people here,
kickscreamteaching
↓
64e7f39b-85c3-446a-8df2-4f62b1b812f9.gif
that's fine, but if you ever yell at my friend again
friendyell
↓
2332ba2e-3e13-4d56-9b61-28f72cf5db5e.gif
over nothing, then I will personally wipe
personallywipe
↓
6aff3199-9cd9-4f18-98c6-e2ee1e30ea79.gif
that scary smile off your face,
facescarysmile
↓
cdba5638-cf54-4c9c-b101-44e99aba8a9b.gif
put it in my purse and keep it there until no one around here
purse
↓
a3510a35-46d6-49ff-a906-e7009c615fa3.gif
is any more scared of you than I am.
scared
↓
62016c66-bef1-416c-9837-500508e44cb1.gif
It's not fair.
fair
↓
61c8ceb0-9475-4edb-a842-066a5f795fe5.gif
Wait, why are you eating in here?
eating
↓
7620d3c7-4a74-4ac5-8a26-6ca8524a092d.gif
T-man's afraid of Kelso.
afraidkelsomans
↓
e0042299-7f68-46b7-b958-bf24208b1886.gif
I'm not afraid of Kelso.
afraidkelso
↓
504c8e50-3d00-408a-b8a5-0212360a1744.gif
I just felt like eating in here.
eating
↓
dd8cb8f4-5495-4454-af14-3d2e7966c1e4.gif
Go outside and stand up for yourself.
stand
↓
9b4c6314-c26d-4826-9abc-e5781a131a5d.gif
Hell, yeah.
↓
0ac43466-9b2b-41a6-a02b-6b009544f9d2.gif
Dude, you know what else stands up for itself?
stands
↓
17d5c69f-fbad-482c-b807-95f0e3860bf4.gif
You know, Todd, I'm not sure.
todd
↓
a11c4e5e-b299-4cb1-949f-4dca73ee7bc0.gif
But I'm gonna guess that it's your penis.
penis
↓
c8bdcb31-2dfb-43df-b32f-d49de12a0ee2.gif
It is.
↓
9875b0b3-a137-476b-a8f6-ecc95d1921c9.gif
Oh, no.
↓
f603e4fb-a414-4c0e-9200-d064cc7a2c89.gif
Everyone, we can all relax now.
relax
↓
a380b806-fa0d-41a5-bec0-b9c76363bbd3.gif
The planets have been realigned
planets
↓
5ef9350a-d149-48f6-bd51-977bb5853f81.gif
and order shall be returned to the people.
orderreturned
↓
1bccbd05-b1d1-47f6-b428-e6851f08676b.gif
- Hey, you. - Just give me two seconds.
seconds
↓
ae3aa584-882e-4515-9923-05d2b547a276.gif
Gotta finish e-mailing Jill.
finishjillmailing
↓
11f54239-e98e-4538-ae47-d696c2b0f66a.gif
I have, right here, your little friend's test results.
friendsresultstesttest-results
↓
0cc2cc43-b92d-4b27-8b31-f3613df2cc1a.gif
Shall we have some fun and take a look?
fun
↓
2a3bec22-add1-4179-b17f-4802733c637d.gif
Hmm, interesting.
interesting
↓
eb3bd99f-040d-4c88-8feb-1f896773c208.gif
EKG, negative. Tilt table, negative.
negativetabletilt
↓
396e376e-8980-4562-8013-01b0d0350c4c.gif
Nothing, in fact, is wrong with her
fact
↓
c23ae2a7-2721-4701-a2dd-def086eeed63.gif
but exhaustion, brought on by...
brought
↓
89a22e1c-f8a9-43ea-af44-3b1406e6b9f9.gif
let it come... being her.
↓
60765e97-284c-45e6-ba05-511c60126b44.gif
- Yeah, but if you don't... - No, no, no. No, no, no.
↓
1bc52f8d-09d4-40a8-9708-108f493751e1.gif
There's no time for "Yeah, buts."
buts
↓
299772fb-ab4e-4ba8-b966-13a680254777.gif
I want her punted out of here in the next five minutes
fivefive-minutesminutes
↓
7797f996-f04a-464d-b551-19261b8f47cd.gif
or you will be responsible for covering every missed shift
coveringmissedresponsibleshift
↓
2ccf7577-cb9c-4da6-807e-4bdb9377070d.gif
during this year's flu season.
seasonyears
↓
ff1813df-2de3-48eb-9e8a-251a253a52d0.gif
Now go, now go, now go.
↓
575dcf3e-4455-4fba-b7ad-bcc1cc04d608.gif
[whistles] Hey, you...
whistles
↓
a9116b9a-3b8a-4413-b20a-cdba23494e06.gif
For what it's worth, I don't care if your beeper plays
beepercareplaysworth
↓
7b3b0569-8338-48a0-b6ea-d44bd32c438d.gif
as many times as you like.
times
↓
b5bf01ff-3a5c-4b6b-94dd-0c55907c641d.gif
Actually, sir, it's "who, who."
↓
ecce1196-2322-418e-91f1-e3a5368b579d.gif
- Thank you. That's great. - Sure.
↓
acfcc39a-5aeb-467f-8fbf-77cec61c8f86.gif
And, Ginger, by the way,
ginger
↓
0edd3562-f395-4e06-af93-7b0be57cb07b.gif
just a real smooth move running to your mommy.
mommyrealrunningsmooth
↓
6f71d601-c6c1-4842-8e44-d473d9cdc7ce.gif
- Excuse me? - Yeah, your mommy cr-rushed me.
excusemommyrushed
↓
78068245-49d8-4d09-a5ee-f4805c3dc626.gif
She did. I'd like to issue a warning to everybody,
everybodyissuewarning
↓
e221f901-f95b-426b-925c-1742b85b4afa.gif
and I'm dead serious.
deaddead-seriousserious
↓
113e51b6-71b9-4e65-8e54-238d20e76d8c.gif
FYI: J.D.'s mommy has made it perfectly clear
clearmommyperfectlyperfectly-clear
↓
4e7b2944-9a99-4285-9af6-739eac9c551a.gif
that she doesn't want her daughter picked on anymore.
anymoredaughterpicked
↓
67bb2371-43a4-4984-a920-58360780a347.gif
Nothing mean. She's a precious flower
flowerprecious
↓
b7b7f267-6c86-4276-a170-8c22bc94ab13.gif
and we should all be super nice to her.
super
↓
e7ad439f-5d8e-4e8f-a711-48024ab8911e.gif
[pager]
pager
↓
39a2813b-65ad-4eee-93e5-025f1f5362c5.gif
I was paged.
paged
↓
0bf5a295-bf1f-410a-9fa8-e3edc5938cc4.gif
Hello?
↓
14250051-78ac-4c2a-94ff-7f250138b2a4.gif
Anyone?
↓
daac9e06-14e2-40f6-875b-a115c0d39657.gif
Oh, hell, no!
↓
ac67cbb0-7735-4534-92b8-fc2e15d44ae6.gif
When I get out of here, we should totally hang.
hang
↓
6e1a7454-afc7-44f3-a2dd-cc94085a88b6.gif
I'd love to. I should warn you, though,
lovewarn
↓
4162dde2-5402-48e2-85a2-0918d563c2ef.gif
I work a ton and when I'm off, I stay at home to catch up
catchhome
↓
0b201920-4622-4144-9de7-51e55ab7102f.gif
on paperwork or read medical journals
medicalpaperworkread
↓
3db5d4e2-4c4d-46c8-a4a1-cd4de34de265.gif
just to stay ahead of the curve.
aheadcurve
↓
be92be72-ed39-4735-853d-e97e60b0bc27.gif
I'm a nerd.
nerd
↓
2ae59a4e-ff8b-468d-973c-0da3781e62f0.gif
I wish I could stay home and read sometimes,
homereadsometimeswish
↓
f914abd7-aa63-4716-92b7-7185469fbe3b.gif
but my job, it's like... you know?
↓
e194ad68-cce1-4732-a381-42bf1fce52e8.gif
With married-by-the-millennium
marriedmillennium
↓
3d8fe532-57c3-4b3b-a7bd-f7ad5ea84b6d.gif
still hanging over my head, I go on like 1,000 blind dates.
blindblind-datesdateshanginghead
↓
f7e26a55-aa23-412d-870d-a73ed19ec521.gif
And then there's all my friends who always need something.
friends
↓
dbe63c90-da69-4283-83fc-07485a6c8d26.gif
There's me who never wants to let anyone down, you know, ever.
wants
↓
e0876824-bd51-4d6f-84bf-9a6b36810c2c.gif
With so many balls in the air,
balls
↓
5288314d-109e-4290-969e-9caafb27415d.gif
sometimes, it gets, it gets a little overwhelming.
overwhelmingsometimes
↓
dca1208d-db1e-4bc1-ac46-076957c90af6.gif
As soon as I leave, I know I'm going right back to that mess.
mess
↓
1cfa8738-ea02-400e-9740-3ce191d7b82d.gif
Oh, my God, I'm practically crying.
cryingpractically
↓
f18b2b1c-bad0-495d-a993-eab82af122b0.gif
How pathetic is that?
pathetic
↓
790cfc63-61a4-4855-8ac4-a6093b75d3f8.gif
I came down to tell you that we're gonna keep you here
↓
682f4df9-c769-4945-a7a6-89f2b5452f83.gif
for the weekend, just to get some rest.
restweekend
↓
a98aaffc-f8e6-4293-a360-63ee8904670f.gif
It's so on.
↓
faec6ad3-f815-400a-864d-fe01d059bd13.gif
Mommy.
mommy
↓
afc10534-a834-49a3-9809-ca287b841f46.gif
Mommy. Mommy.
mommy
↓
c43cb800-d903-481e-a80b-18180592d17a.gif
Mommy.
mommy
↓
95d23224-0b67-4f11-b567-398c002844ca.gif
Give me that, Bambi, that's not a toy.
bambi
↓
58a99fdd-19ca-421d-aaff-d24543c6c996.gif
My name is not Bambi, okay?
bambiname
↓
3dd2fd35-7e49-4da8-80e5-bafa14d02f08.gif
It's Dr. Dorian.
dorian
↓
d803a803-59b5-43df-9652-67042aa29c5d.gif
I don't need to be looked after, okay?
looked
↓
86fa69e4-26d3-4837-9b1c-ae500b8125f6.gif
So, look, how about I'll be the doctor and you be the nurse.
doctornurse
↓
c7398c5b-12dd-418c-a784-bb6f1e61ebf4.gif
Yes, doctor.
doctor
↓
23cae5ff-e9e2-4d62-bb74-167a19863517.gif
Good choice.
choice
↓
7b149c08-fd9c-44f8-8de1-3d97461c8e61.gif
I have... I have to go check on something.
check
↓
d57f1e60-ec11-4eba-9112-1326af4a3139.gif
Carla, wait.
carla
↓
40fafe6f-b25f-422b-adae-00a1fe406d37.gif
What did you do?
↓
7be2ff96-da4d-49a5-b50b-2960de7e80b9.gif
- What did you do? - What did you do?
↓
2ed3ea58-4a07-4043-82a5-f7b3f78a393d.gif
She called me Bambi in front of everyone.
bambicalledfront
↓
829b3f0a-9379-4007-b819-e0092d080a9a.gif
My name is not Bambi!
bambiname
↓
98deff3a-395b-40dc-8f09-cbcc183be7bd.gif
It's Scooter!
scooter
↓
7d547e15-6ed5-4cea-b59b-79fd6047e4f5.gif
Oh!
↓
90752b96-8e9b-4622-b901-2066c9939036.gif
Short for scooter pie.
scootershort
↓
3b0ae141-5c64-4d29-a890-39f35cebd61b.gif
Baby, J.D. is my best friend,
babybestbest-friendfriend
↓
dd317834-a2c5-4d66-99d5-a750025f37a3.gif
but if you need me to kick his ass, I will kick his ass,
kick
↓
f97a189f-f38d-447f-afd5-739270ce3dea.gif
'cause I care for you.
care
↓
4d278acf-b397-4096-8fd6-59d1f9ac08a0.gif
And I'm willing to sleep with you.
sleepwilling
↓
4ab48f18-1d1d-4d2a-89ce-8a67970ad996.gif
Hell, yeah.
↓
1d561d9b-fa86-42fc-950c-983eec068096.gif
Sweetie, you know if I wanted his ass kicked I'd do it myself.
kickedsweetiewanted
↓
1df2ca02-67b5-411d-945b-66cbe03fb2e8.gif
[catty growl]
growl
↓
73630f16-1c5d-4000-8d5e-fd5ff951f5f7.gif
Todd,
todd
↓
8af8fada-c20b-44be-99cd-49c3bdfe0b37.gif
if you ever make that horny-cat noise at me again,
hornynoise
↓
95f3b7a0-040c-4331-b4bb-bf7efa559114.gif
I will reach into your mouth and unscrew that seven-watt bulb
bulbmouthreachseven
↓
72f42b9d-cb46-4e6a-938b-4a05fa982ae3.gif
that barely keeps your brain open for business.
barelybrainbusinesskeepsopen
↓
681569cb-f1a1-4b3e-bdb6-cd05e99a95ec.gif
Damn.
↓
958f6245-9c7b-473e-a22f-d0d0e83a6422.gif
Dude, chick threats are hot.
chickthreats
↓
fdabd85e-aa2e-4921-b866-5537bf47e112.gif
What did I tell you about annoying Carla?
annoyingcarla
↓
587513c4-3bf4-4c4b-9a64-5a134e3f8332.gif
If she makes me choose between the two of you,
choosemakes
↓
695cd3c7-9ebc-47f6-872e-03beba9b5369.gif
you know how it's gonna end up.
↓
72d50f4b-969b-469d-a398-7edb952c7424.gif
Yes, I do. And I thank you for that.
↓
1dd93270-7d63-4a71-b480-2ce38b4b7c31.gif
♪ Alouette ♪
↓
812a776e-62a7-461c-aac3-e866f23627a6.gif
Could you be cuter with the new hair color?
colorhair
↓
dc721f15-b778-4620-88d8-1e13a9e0631e.gif
Holy cow! Please, no.
holy
↓
90e92db0-2959-4ac5-880b-4c75ec41f2e6.gif
No.
↓
b1527c40-2ce5-4cdc-954d-b294373a59a8.gif
Good morning, sunshine.
morningmorning-sunshinesunshine
↓
af009ee3-f76b-47ab-9397-6112e39466a5.gif
Could you possibly excuse me for just one second?
excusepossiblysecond
↓
abe48c52-7d2d-468f-8d3c-7297c94f08b5.gif
Oh, dear God, you're still here.
dear
↓
b641d9f1-9b67-4828-8528-e16635057460.gif
Who exactly is doing this to me?
↓
bcb9dea8-007a-4632-b4a4-4d2917d9299a.gif
- Look, Carla... - It's okay. You overreacted.
carlaoverreacted
↓
70c630fa-8162-42db-9373-ebce74459691.gif
I should've realized you can stand up for yourself.
realizedshouldvestand
↓
018219ba-60e5-4fee-b07c-86d763f5d90b.gif
Actually...
↓
2e77c15c-7192-4c3c-834e-b7be061ea3dc.gif
I know you would take it back if you could. I do.
↓
24bb8b5f-504f-49de-8bf6-38c4e348f3ab.gif
We're okay, right?
↓
43867578-1496-41a4-bb37-ca80a5583173.gif
I think I've said all I can.
↓
a5acb35b-d73f-4c26-9684-22d4d973bdd4.gif
I'll see you tonight for the exhibit.
exhibittonight
↓
68594fd9-9514-47dd-a13b-eb8d84545619.gif
- Why'd you have me paged? - To ask you to forgive me.
forgivepagedwhyd
↓
a5872ae8-3951-4038-951b-2a56759d55a2.gif
For what?
↓
2e005e38-febf-448d-8fb3-dcf36887e1d9.gif
Hello, sad clown.
clown
↓
224b9491-d6b7-40b6-aa15-c8807d2755ca.gif
- Thanks for paging her. - How could you?
pagingthanks
↓
3951c193-35ca-4453-80f5-1013316c985d.gif
He called me cutie and said my eyes were as blue as the ocean.
bluecalledcutieeyesocean
↓
c23939f0-8399-45d3-b62d-fe56cac0cdcc.gif
I... I got confused.
confused
↓
5fcfea8d-9dc0-469b-8dec-56d3633be8c2.gif
It probably would've worked on me too.
workedwouldve
↓
33f537e4-f625-4783-9b64-6b76bda9c332.gif
You're damn right it would've. Come.
wouldve
↓
c2d2a336-22e2-498c-8376-2895c0f7f678.gif
- Is he single? - [door slams]
doordoor-slamssingleslams
↓
22290407-7f57-4d8f-ade3-a146b3bfd9d5.gif
Hello?
↓
b3873aad-7e9c-446a-b80a-15b5d1ae5442.gif
Look at you, all proud.
proud
↓
45a85c24-7bbe-4b32-9472-44c64ace11eb.gif
Now, don't tell me you've already managed to eat?
managed
↓
c4543771-0799-46f4-80d2-4d8a42626115.gif
I took my sweet time, too.
sweet
↓
13eb190e-e28e-4d1d-8ba8-266b3d3232ff.gif
Consider that your last supper.
considersupper
↓
8a2364f0-efbe-40d4-8967-46c763ec3ded.gif
I'm bored with the games.
boredgames
↓
918c61ee-ccd5-4425-af06-24685f3eb6cf.gif
Are you forbidding me to sit here?
↓
5c34a2be-f5d9-42c2-866d-7eb62703c20c.gif
This is a public bench.
benchpublic
↓
e554a64a-6d3e-4956-8a57-a70a50ecff68.gif
You are as welcome here as I am but you won't come back again.
welcome
↓
ed07f484-3ccd-4a69-b02e-2180af5a655b.gif
You know why? Because you just don't have the mettle.
↓
2ca20c55-b3e3-413c-b69e-915bc04c4ef4.gif
Now get the hell out of here
↓
c46959b3-0dfb-489a-ab66-a205d0a4c460.gif
so I can eat my wife's egg-salad sandwich
saladsandwichwifes
↓
3a5347ca-c2e5-408f-974b-9b367408054a.gif
before the tomato soaks through the bread.
breadtomato
↓
1806ca84-ffec-4564-bf7c-51650cef2a83.gif
Beautiful day.
↓
d5be091f-87ac-4acb-a122-58bb46f61168.gif
Did you get into photography when you were in college or...?
collegephotography
↓
61571cea-9d29-4f9e-9298-5bbdeb57d518.gif
No. Actually, I never went to college.
college
↓
e7d3e0ac-6379-402c-85a1-b1dd12f0cc18.gif
Ah.
↓
9cbe7b34-2ca5-46b6-9b2b-4e1b224a532e.gif
Don't tell any of my patients but neither did I.
patients
↓
f4f5648f-023a-45e5-af6c-e54317259693.gif
Is that supposed to make me feel better or something?
supposed
↓
05b8be03-4ce6-48fd-8960-9541af7c7fd8.gif
What? No, it was just a joke.
joke
↓
be1f442a-1837-4098-bbc9-128c7ca8f329.gif
I was doing the whole, like, turn a frown upside-down.
frownupsidewhole
↓
d41429ca-ea11-4084-9440-e0e9610f867c.gif
Yeah, you know what? Hold it. I don't think we're okay.
↓
74e4ebda-1593-4c75-b5e9-37de8f4dd33f.gif
Wait, you just accepted my apology. You can't take it back.
acceptedapology
↓
a099b247-33cc-4b33-bcfe-41781c0a9cd7.gif
Have you ever spent time with a woman?
spentwoman
↓
aeecad35-bce8-4f9b-a0cf-793d66a5b1a2.gif
Is my punishment coming or is it just horrible staring
cominghorriblepunishmentstaring
↓
acdf045b-5878-4888-b1c6-4bd15892d780.gif
because the anticipation is killing me.
killing
↓
5351565d-404e-4de3-83ee-f3fcf1e2beb9.gif
- Make your case. - I'm sorry, what?
case
↓
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Well, you tell me why Chorey McCrazy Chore
chore
↓
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should get to stay here two more nights.
nights
↓
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Okay.
↓
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You don't understand how hard it is for some women
hardwomen
↓
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to make it on their own nowadays.
nowadays
↓
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Jill is so exhausted. It won't get easier.
easierexhaustedjill
↓
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She's her own worst enemy.
enemyworst
↓
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She's constantly trying to please.
constantly
↓
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She judges herself harsher than anyone does.
judges
↓
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Have you actually seen what you look like today?
seentoday
↓
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I know, I'm a skank. She never says no to anyone, so...
skank
↓
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Swing by my apartment after work,
apartmentswing
↓
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pick up a sample of my dog's stool
dogspicksamplestool
↓
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and take it to the vet for me?
↓
e5b26ff3-dce1-463e-b97b-2b895ca3eb80.gif
I can do it at lunch.
lunch
↓
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[elevator bell rings]
bellbell-ringselevatorelevator-bellrings
↓
7931024f-a0ae-43fc-9fda-436b0e593330.gif
- Oh... - It's okay.
↓
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Jill can stay a little longer.
jilllonger
↓
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And if we're real lucky, she'll realize that it's okay
luckyrealrealizeshell
↓
d465c59e-4edf-4e44-ae84-83a2c23dafed.gif
to give yourself a break every once in a while, right?
break
↓
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Yeah.
↓
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Hey. I took a cab from the last stop.
↓
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- You forgot your coat. - I don't want it.
coatforgot
↓
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Why would you?
↓
f0e4c2ac-87ba-4c0e-9a5d-4eddf6a3eb53.gif
I was only gonna go to that stupid exhibit
exhibitstupid
↓
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because I wanted you to think I was brainy or something.
wanted
↓
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- I'm so angry at myself. - Oh, thank goodness.
angrygoodness
↓
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I thought you were mad at me.
↓
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I've had hundreds of interns decide
decidehundredsinterns
↓
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that they don't need me anymore. Why should...?
anymore
↓
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You see, this is why you can't be friends with doctors.
doctorsfriends
↓
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Carla, if it's a problem,
carlaproblem
↓
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you, me, Elliot and Turk will get together...
elliotturk
↓
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I don't work with Turk and I'm not that close to Elliot.
closeelliotturk
↓
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The only problem here is you, okay?
problem
↓
4c3274ef-a816-45cb-869c-3b2502be8f5d.gif
We're supposed to be friends.
friendssupposed
↓
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Your self-esteem is so wrapped up in what you do.
esteemselfself-esteemwrapped
↓
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A doctor. That's all you are. That's how you define yourself.
definedoctor
↓
1144febc-2f8a-445e-b02a-6fb357e220fb.gif
And you think that you're better than me because of it.
↓
fcef4ec1-8727-4689-89c3-90675abde73f.gif
- Carla, I do not think... - Admit it.
admitcarla
↓
e1a53ece-7855-4516-9b17-229bab677655.gif
Admit it right now or I'll never respect you again.
admitrespect
↓
879f9696-8d74-4244-afbe-49c5f5158c6b.gif
Okay. Sometimes that's true.
sometimes
↓
2261a464-05e3-4450-8841-2d054600645c.gif
Carla, you're a good nurse.
carlanurse
↓
d69d1d06-0147-43d7-8631-1da7f2737cdf.gif
I'm a great nurse.
nurse
↓
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You patronizing ass.
patronizing
↓
a66d1457-afea-48ed-a999-535218c08347.gif
You don't even get it, do you?
↓
3c65bff1-9781-4bd6-a6cc-b33a3875ac72.gif
In nine years, I never once felt bad about myself
nineyears
↓
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for what I do, not for one second.
second
↓
68acce9e-a2e2-49ef-a1fb-80984e2762c0.gif
And then I met you.
↓
65c5743d-7211-4093-8ad6-1925dc873888.gif
- Please wait. - Don't.
↓
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Hey.
↓
9e25c575-eebc-49be-af49-9bc7f941be39.gif
is through someone else's eyes.
elseseyes
↓
2a771beb-c6c4-48ff-b9ee-53714c306715.gif
Impressive.
impressive
↓
4cb19681-7bab-4075-8044-859119f6f9ca.gif
Or you'll learn from it.
learn
↓
d03e6a5a-4f3f-49b3-a8e3-d193ae96877d.gif
Hey, how many MeQs of potassium should I give this guy?
potassium
↓
0918b8eb-edf4-435a-bbc8-b633284904d2.gif
You know the answer to that. Don't do that.
answer
↓
c6462f49-9f4a-4d79-bd56-ca097cb56748.gif
But thanks, Bambi.
bambithanks
↓
ea3f6318-96ab-41c0-8542-433d84cf0a72.gif
See you tomorrow, Scooter.
scootertomorrow
↓
4be5e2dd-a72b-4540-8c5f-575fcdea2a22.gif
[Irish music]
irishmusic
↓
81c39865-9f7e-4c73-98dd-882bf839cd67.gif
He's actually very talented.
talented