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Rick and Morty

Season 6, Episode 3 โ€” Bethic Twinstinct

TMDB episode metadata
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Oh my god, I cannot fucking believe this, here we fucking go!
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Jeez!
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Pardon the interruption. We are once again in the federal clear.
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Rick what the hell? Are you a Turkey Dracula now?
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Morty, is that a Pooplickian GamePod?
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Actually itโ€™s the GamePod XL.
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They say itโ€™s the most realistic video game console ever.
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- I never got you that. - Space Mom did.
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Sheโ€™s in for the holiday weekend. Remember?
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Shit, in that case, letโ€™s go,
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- letโ€™s get out of h... - I heard you smack the glass, Dad,
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- if you bail, Iโ€™ll disown you! - Iโ€™d say donโ€™t hop through a portal.
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But wait, you canโ€™t.
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Look at it this way, Morty.
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Life is a subscription and Thanksgiving is your familyโ€™s yearly charge.
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Wow Dad, good job.
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Rick, put some pants on. Today has so few rules.
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Yes, Patriarch.
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Iโ€™d like to make a toast. Today is a day for thanks. And for family.
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And for remembering all of those that have less.
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- Okay, pick a scope. - Pick a scope?
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- Can we please have a normal Thanksgiving? - Well seems like all the ones I remember.
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Good point.
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Baby, you, itโ€™s a toast.
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- Sorry! - Sorry!
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Anyway, Iโ€™m thankful for my wife. Beth. The Beth that chose me.
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Iโ€™m so grateful to you, and I literally could not live without you.
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I really mean that. If something were to happen to you,
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or if you were to leave me, or be unfaithful, I would die.
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Literally. Probably by my own hand.
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- Okay. - I know how Iโ€™d do it.
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Our first blender has an extra long cord
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and it was manufactured before safety fuses, so Iโ€™d draw a warm bath...
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And blend some stuff, good toast, honey. To thankfulness.
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- To... America? - To ending the toast?
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- To ending the toast. - To ending the toast.
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Just to, be clear, I was saying Iโ€™d kill myself.
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- God. - God, we know.
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but I know youโ€™re just a scared little overachiever that keeps all her OCD right.
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- My God. - Yeah.
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By the way you better be taking notes, Iโ€™m next.
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- Itโ€™s my back you dumb bitch. - Nice.
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What?
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- Well I better get back to bed. - Same
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So now youโ€™re into highly realistic video games?
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Maybe I decided real life was too much right now
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or maybe Iโ€™m not afraid to change my mind about stuff,
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maybe mental flexibility is stronger than stubbornness.
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Nice manipโ€™, Sum-Sum. Okay, Iโ€™m in the alley behind the library.
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- Uptown or downtown? - Shit, thereโ€™s one uptown, too?
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Itโ€™s okay, stay there, I think Iโ€™m near the red line.
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- Is this Street Fighter? - Street Fighter where you start
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at the beginning of each fighterโ€™s day and have to find each other to fight.
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Itโ€™s very realistic. Not even guaranteed a fight will happen.
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That meter filling up is us forgetting what made us so mad.
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If anyoneโ€™s interested in a higher level of realism, Iโ€™m โ€œbooting upโ€ the O.G.
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Thatโ€™s Original Game, called a jigsaw puzzle, in the den.
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Hey, gang! Me and my space self are gonna make a run to the Gloppy Drop System
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for ice cream. Any flavor requests?
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- Vanilla! - Vanilla!
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Why do you guys have to go all the way to deep space just for ice cream?
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Gloppy Dropulites have less taste buds than humans,
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their ice cream is like a hospital bed,
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itโ€™s designed for you to do less so it does more.
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Okay see ya in a bit.
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Iโ€™ll get started sorting all the obvious sky pieces. Secret technique.
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- Oh fuck itโ€™s ON, bitch! - Oh shit there you are!
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- Iโ€™m gonna eat your ass. - You will die in the street like a dog!
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Stunning.
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Thank you. This is incredible.
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Just glad I had something in your size.
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How far is Gloppy Drop? And why do I always think Iโ€™m wearing a watch?
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I actually have a pint of Gloppy Drop on a little apartment orbiting Earth.
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- So we have time. - You have your own space station?
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We have our own space station. Weโ€™re the same person.
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Thereโ€™s differences. Like, one of us has no idea who she really is.
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Wrong. But letโ€™s make a deal.
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Letโ€™s trust ourselves enough to stop wondering who we are when weโ€™re together.
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We get to say anything to each other.
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Things weโ€™d never say to anyone else, even ourselves.
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What donโ€™t we say to ourselves?
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How about my ass looks good in that space suit.
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I mean it. Iโ€™m a good looking woman.
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Well thatโ€™s nice of you to say.
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I also... find myself... quite attractive.
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We forgot the ice cream.
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I want you back in my guts like Iโ€™m one of your sick little fillies.
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Goddammit, Morty! You canโ€™t just take my controller.
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Yes I can! Itโ€™s mine.
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- Okay, Sum-Sum, gimme. - Make your own controller,
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some of us need all the control we can get.
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Fuck you!
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So why are you so suddenly into realistic video games?
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- I already was. - But now youโ€™re into them the way I am.
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You mean like staring at them in a numb trance.
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Not judging, just noticing.
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You tend to notice stuff a little before I do.
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But eventually you do notice.
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And now we can both not notice together, yes.
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My god, Beth?!
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I thought you said you got ice cream?
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- I. It must be in the... - The car! We left it in the car.
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Okay, good, because that would have been weird!
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I worry things might become more and more noticeable.
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And if he kills himself weโ€™re gonna have to get a new dad
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Jesus Christ, Summer!
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- Dad. Whatโ€™s this? - Making a controller.
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This species of bionic space whale has carbon wiring, great for smooth gameplay.
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Iโ€™m not killing it, for the record.
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Iโ€™m just replacing its esophagus with a better one. For free.
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It should thank me. And it will, with its mind.
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These things are telepathic, Beth, they talk to you in dreams.
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Does your replicator thing make ice cream from the Gloppy Drop system?
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Why would you want replicated Gloppy Drop ice cream, poser?
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Crazy thing, I went with Space Beth to get some and we had such a great time
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we forgot the ice cream. Crazy right?
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- Thatโ€™s a real question? - Maybe?
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Come here, hold the pup down.
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Youโ€™re talking about an infinite father.
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Iโ€™ve met myself out there infinite times...
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Infinite shit happens. Including, as you put it, forgetting the ice cream.
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- Youโ€™ve... forgotten the ice cream? - Drill me for details when Iโ€™m drunker.
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In the meantime, donโ€™t worry about whatโ€™s crazy.
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- Iโ€™know, as the kids say, you do you. - Thanks. Thank you so much, Dad.
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One thing to keep in mind, though.
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Itโ€™s not just your own ice cream youโ€™re forgetting. Itโ€™s your familyโ€™s.
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If you forget it too much, you start having to keep secrets.
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- And youโ€™re against secrets. - Against? Hell no. Secrets are great.
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For instance, Iโ€™ve had a pint of vanilla Gloppy Drop in my fridge this whole time.
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Take it. Iโ€™m just saying, lies pile up.
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Like credit card debt. You retain an advantage by staying liquid.
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Gotcha. Well. Iโ€™d call this a simple cash transaction.
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Fun. And. Done.
fun
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Favorite Culkin?
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- Kieran! - Kieran!
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Favorite song by Britney?
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- Work Bitch! - Work Bitch!
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Favorite hangover cure?
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- Hair of the dog - Hair of the dog
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with a guilty pleasure like Humans Weekly.
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I told Dad. I mean I didnโ€™t have to. He knew.
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I guess thatโ€™s one reason you didnโ€™t have to tell him.
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Whatโ€™d he say?
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We kind of talked in code, I think he said itโ€™s fine
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until it makes us feel indebted to our lessers.
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That sounds like Dad.
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Do... we... owe... the family an explanation?
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Do we have to spend our time together figuring out how to please others?
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Iโ€™m married. We both are but Iโ€™m in our marriage.
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Itโ€™s the defining difference between us.
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Well thereโ€™s no rule book that says you have to be.
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Whatโ€™s gonna happen? What is this? Are we in love? With ourself?
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I mean, does that make us the most or the least healthy woman in the universe?
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Anybody ever tell you youโ€™re overly analytical? Which I do love?
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- If thatโ€™s what you need to call it? - I donโ€™t need to call it anything.
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- I would like to know... its shelf life. - I might know a way to gather that data.
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- The Holodeck! - Motel Room!
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I like yours better.
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Beth! My Beth! Well, not โ€œmyโ€ Beth, but... I finished! Itโ€™s done!
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Kids do you know where your moms are? Oh youโ€™re busy with your GamePod,
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donโ€™t worry about it, Iโ€™ll find those two somewhere
โ†“
f985da81-20bc-4334-b55b-3821b16f869d.gif
No! No, dad, come play videogames with us.
โ†“
a6e197c3-2df9-449a-96b0-2765eed5a37a.gif
Okay Dad hereโ€™s the infinite menu screen.
โ†“
516fe4f4-fb1b-457d-8c06-12ce475131e6.gif
- I dunno. - Here, here,
โ†“
e63efbf1-0bc2-4bcd-ab3b-922df711af4d.gif
Iโ€™ll have the console choose a game!
โ†“
68210a96-78cc-49ca-b05f-9d207c1ebadc.gif
Maybe letโ€™s skip this one?
โ†“
4f931665-2bba-4ee5-9261-ae47a01b41f5.gif
Really? Why? Looks fun!
fun
โ†“
ae30c630-e839-48dc-ac7a-4b756a295ab9.gif
So we are a woman married to a man but having a sexual affair with another woman!
โ†“
0ce6f359-48dd-48ce-b45d-d58fa3808adb.gif
- Very spicy. - Very spicy, Jer. Good job.
โ†“
a33357a8-e7ce-4ccf-86fe-fc19a95e4d01.gif
Looks pretty single player, kids?
โ†“
da164178-c454-48da-957f-dea6b660e350.gif
Seriously you two?! What the hell did you do in my holodeck?!
โ†“
a8f2d96c-d28e-43da-98c0-bfff65e0805a.gif
Holy shit, you did a full โ€˜San Juniperoโ€™ in here?
โ†“
86c8ea06-9989-4e70-ab1a-fc582a70cd9a.gif
My god, Beth, thereโ€™s masturbating and then thereโ€™s masturbating.
โ†“
94250aec-0dcb-4a40-b1d1-9667374483e2.gif
- Dad stop, Iโ€™m sorry! - Youโ€™d know, old man.
โ†“
0cdaa9e7-de83-4f55-8c87-0750d8f5c891.gif
Look, this isnโ€™t my business and by all means
โ†“
ec69cea6-7024-4784-87a7-74f5a1a6cea4.gif
enjoy being sapphic horse girls together. But you suck at doing it secretly.
โ†“
6501dc7f-33b5-4eb0-94ac-c9648f939b7c.gif
- We all know. - Including Jerry?!
โ†“
76388bda-cf74-435b-a956-1cf77325a50e.gif
No, Dadโ€™s so in the dark that heโ€™s enjoying a video game
โ†“
92d729fa-2646-4212-baf3-c1b6a70169cc.gif
about being in an affair right now.
โ†“
9ca44bd4-6075-480c-af49-d494c985c018.gif
If you guys are doing this, you gotta tell him.
โ†“
794dc3f2-6d8c-4c1d-8418-38a18de53441.gif
- Okay, little man, back off. - Take it easy. Theyโ€™re right.
โ†“
8a1e0ccd-c6c3-41d9-87f3-010a85990bef.gif
Right about what, that we have to be twice as considerate
โ†“
df85ea0f-b2ab-48bf-8851-ea22c38d50e0.gif
and twice as repressed because some dick split us in two?
โ†“
e8d0ee2e-9ae3-431c-91dd-9ecc6a63c3b7.gif
This is the shit I left. This isnโ€™t. This is me.
โ†“
aa319fc2-5f6a-433b-a9c9-7549155de646.gif
This is the me that doesnโ€™t tell you all to fuck off. So allow me. Fuck off.
โ†“
2a509642-f7ac-4a1f-b330-9026b4893933.gif
Sheโ€™ll tell her husband what she wants when she feels like it.
โ†“
dc02e57f-6ba2-4951-973d-094fac9edb4b.gif
And you can deal with it or you can deal with me.
โ†“
56e5948e-7816-47c3-a00d-e97600017ea2.gif
But you should know I have all the Predator weapons.
โ†“
1591092d-276b-4066-9d12-6e882c4c2ca3.gif
- Works for me. - Thatโ€™s cool.
โ†“
ee7fa7b3-2fa4-4963-98a2-8eb642b37db2.gif
- Fair enough. - I guess itโ€™s time for ice cream.
โ†“
46b90b39-4c02-4f08-ae4a-6bbab99ff2d9.gif
Come on, kids, youโ€™re inhaling this stuff.
โ†“
44904557-dfcf-4583-afb1-58807ef6e2f0.gif
Your Moms went to space, did you even thank them for doing it?
โ†“
56660540-e1a0-40e4-acff-75965e22634b.gif
Thanks for... doing it, Moms.
โ†“
85af4555-82fe-4430-9b4a-c0c9e4b0f3b4.gif
Very selfless of you.
โ†“
dd07ef99-e310-443a-9462-cda6ca0fde85.gif
Eat your ice cream however you want. Nothing good lasts forever.
โ†“
8c3fe6b6-cc71-4ff1-85f8-3389f9af1bfe.gif
Okay, cโ€™mon, itโ€™s Thanksgiving, the least we can do is speak English.
โ†“
3b8fc85a-45e8-4d5a-94e3-45605a26a56c.gif
Jerry, I had sex with your wife.
โ†“
0bb8726f-3e31-45d4-9c0a-300a2c2c2656.gif
Or, Iโ€™m your wife and had sex with the clone you sleep with.
โ†“
f82c3ca0-b8ec-475c-b482-e0297ed88e17.gif
Your pick. We had sex. We loved it.
โ†“
9d7024f0-686a-4dfe-9825-1c09e7bcd3fb.gif
Beth Sanchez sure is something?
โ†“
71f0be8f-2ae9-4db1-8736-41f2838b7a83.gif
- I think Iโ€™ll ask her to prom. - Jerry. For your own sake.
โ†“
7856c131-709e-4fd7-a445-78bff5be81bd.gif
Stay away from Beth Sanchez.
โ†“
2910b74b-5803-4a74-8dd3-fc8dd0ae89ba.gif
- Worst case, she says โ€œnoโ€. - No, Jerry. Worst case she says โ€œyesโ€.
โ†“
92db4b97-d1fb-4950-87f6-278cda54a8bf.gif
Sheโ€™s too much woman for you. Maybe sheโ€™d find your simple naรฏvetรฉ endearing
โ†“
48175def-e47b-4405-96da-4972482425a6.gif
but sheโ€™s intense. Sooner or later, sheโ€™d tear you apart.
โ†“
6db32c52-f600-40db-a7ce-03752cc3face.gif
Iโ€™d be lucky to be torn apart by Beth Sanchez.
โ†“
44bdf009-a7cf-459e-a651-63e5f0811192.gif
- What the fuck?! - Dadโ€™s a bug! Dad rolled into a bug!
โ†“
5aef1560-12f2-4b98-b48a-ec52ffbc8b79.gif
Forgot I installed that.
โ†“
6bb7c5ab-c89d-4f57-8513-454917e35dc3.gif
- Why does Jerry have a Pill Bug Protocol? - Itโ€™s an emotional defense system.
โ†“
7854526f-3928-4758-9f62-08ede3b0ced6.gif
I got drunk with Jerry one night
โ†“
c94643d5-7248-4d3c-8531-242643c5e1b1.gif
and he said itโ€™s what he wanted most in the world.
โ†“
cfa427a9-d760-4762-b96d-d3b26adfbb04.gif
Donโ€™t blame me, I wanted tattoos
โ†“
9374bf32-0be0-4e5c-ae3f-f1ce6b8b6983.gif
Anyway, heโ€™s in perfect health in there and he can unroll when he chooses to
โ†“
e3146944-aadc-41c8-8bf0-cb38de86959a.gif
but can also stay in metabolic hibernation pretty much indefinitely.
โ†“
109635b6-4879-431d-9b39-c604082c3940.gif
Itโ€™s a cool power to have, like if you have to fly coach
โ†“
4f4d485d-dcf6-4026-ac95-0f763d9e70c1.gif
or if Summer asks you what you thought of โ€˜Wonder Woman 1984
โ†“
510e1e5f-31c4-4c99-895e-a449d9782bb6.gif
- How do we undo it? - Only he can.
โ†“
663e29ee-1068-4349-bb37-e0eedd5663c9.gif
Thatโ€™s the point. Itโ€™s total safety. Even I canโ€™t reverse it.
โ†“
a33ce380-e1a3-4413-98d9-e96265de3ed4.gif
If you try to pry him out and hit a nerve, heโ€™ll literally turn into a Shrek.
โ†“
80d07827-1a64-4cd1-844d-40e66fd9bebb.gif
In his own sad way, heโ€™s taken control.
โ†“
4211a639-dc6f-472e-9e36-c121622e5312.gif
This is classic Jerry. Heโ€™d rather be a bug than have a conversation.
โ†“
739f9fcd-e78b-4719-9095-7edf4c94f4c5.gif
Have you heard the way you start conversations?
โ†“
4d4db8d1-3515-4bb3-a5f9-b8eecd7f8898.gif
You ladies discuss responsibility while I get stoned
โ†“
30f59b64-b478-460d-ba96-30aa818c52b2.gif
and play video games with your kids.
โ†“
4d54eca6-682f-4c60-b6d4-638ebc87624d.gif
- Fuck! More forest! - Look around!
โ†“
2f2017af-5b43-40d7-aa89-c32ebb842e5c.gif
Try heading North?
โ†“
20274851-a18c-4a1f-9ac7-ef2fa4e66246.gif
- Oh shit. - Wait, what the fuck.
โ†“
67bb1a70-d927-4e2c-aaa4-2bb46cad25e4.gif
Maybe keep heading North?
โ†“
36cc8f81-25ef-461f-bf0e-cb37e720e838.gif
- What the hell?! - God, what happens in the shadows?
โ†“
287220c6-1032-4177-a4f6-264c4d3fa721.gif
Jerry, sweetie?
โ†“
bdf23ae1-b496-43e4-a6a4-dc140276828c.gif
- If you can hear me, please, unroll. - He doesnโ€™t want to.
โ†“
534e5c95-ff27-4f39-ac9c-be5027343640.gif
Itโ€™s a little late to worry about what he wants.
โ†“
2c3c7aa0-38a3-41a4-a2f9-1ffee8a78c94.gif
Jesus, Beth, donโ€™t fall for this. This isnโ€™t love, itโ€™s a tantrum.
โ†“
ec51fffc-de4c-4a3e-a36c-9bc489b71aa0.gif
Yeah but his tantrum is self destructive. Yours is destructive.
โ†“
79f7c164-def3-47ee-9f0e-c6549ccff982.gif
Maybe thatโ€™s why Iโ€™m the one that loves him. He worries.
โ†“
281b3a10-42b2-409c-af21-654482f6b05d.gif
He wants to do right. Heโ€™s ashamed when he fails.
โ†“
6932ca32-1535-40e0-bd21-40403d8c7471.gif
Arenโ€™t those things you love about me?
โ†“
5c2a1e4d-973f-46e6-934c-8c9ee8902724.gif
You want me to be like him? You want me to propose? Threaten to kill myself?
โ†“
22ae5f77-30fb-493c-8072-fbe10b266a7f.gif
No. I love you the way you are. And I did it forever in a video game.
โ†“
336d8dce-566e-403d-931d-b46fe2e9da4c.gif
But in life, things go wrong. Things stop working.
โ†“
42125d62-58a3-4d57-b67d-4758b3a1513a.gif
I like to fix those things, and when I canโ€™t, Iโ€™m pretty useless.
โ†“
f69d7e82-ef21-4b30-ade4-80e5e5264df6.gif
- Like my husband. - I donโ€™t get it.
โ†“
f66dc8f5-918f-4c8b-a02c-0f0daaca60d6.gif
Youโ€™re the house wife and Iโ€™m the space lady
โ†“
7af13895-1d91-4cc9-8c52-61a4982a0241.gif
but youโ€™re the one that chewed me up and spit me out.
โ†“
8562c93a-744d-404e-bf3b-31b089724cd1.gif
I donโ€™t want to just forget about you.
โ†“
d2e3a687-ad26-40da-884e-0aff7ea6e614.gif
Me neither. Itโ€™s a problem.
โ†“
fc057c09-200f-4b54-8e79-e1181a055e1d.gif
But we know someone that owes us a solution.
โ†“
b5fb5f60-89a5-4eff-81ce-02e842dd69ee.gif
Shit, weโ€™re out of the forest! We found a clearing!
โ†“
6583d3c3-6793-42d8-83e0-f249fa74ff68.gif
Go check it out! Go check out the clearing!
โ†“
89b5fc03-b1af-4566-ba63-ab5005c8d1b8.gif
Vampires?! Oh, come on! Thatโ€™s not realistic!
โ†“
894db154-ba3f-4e8a-b2c3-2d59f4389c67.gif
Morty, itโ€™s obviously set in a world where vampires hunt in clearings.
โ†“
8e5f9472-66ab-4171-9050-f7614e710be0.gif
How did you...
โ†“
1b119301-f43c-4db7-a20c-7eebe4b496af.gif
Iโ€™m working with the same information you are.
โ†“
e74cbbf7-0561-4726-9c51-e5f98b9eacb8.gif
No more screen time until your homeworkโ€™s done, Dad.
โ†“
fdc08bba-1d99-4102-a102-6ba6c54d5822.gif
- What did that mean? - We refuse to care
โ†“
407250c9-a1cb-4ebe-9ae6-dc479150fcbd.gif
Damn. You really came of age this Thanksgiving.
โ†“
cc5fa0b5-e159-4e5b-ab36-c070be86c3f8.gif
How old are we? Weโ€™ve had a million Thanksgivings.
โ†“
67e73ee5-ceed-48db-84eb-4754f1c42393.gif
- Can I explain how irrational this is? - Asked the guy that cloned his daughter.
โ†“
20c4fbdd-89e1-41b4-829b-2f6e8da7b593.gif
Will I ever live that down?
โ†“
9782d58b-ef09-448a-9a23-d03582eec7fe.gif
- No - No
โ†“
a2db2e30-cd79-4d0e-99f8-d98e9ba37e29.gif
You guys are having me Eternal Sunshine
โ†“
e14bd656-830d-47cb-a38b-bee4eb7797ab.gif
all the Multiplicity porn scenes from your minds?
โ†“
ca8022c5-093f-4efe-9de9-866f4167767e.gif
- Yep. Basically. - Sounds right.
โ†“
3c3141bb-789f-440a-ad2f-bc282ab15511.gif
Meanwhile, everyone around you, your father, your cuckhold husband,
โ†“
56715672-8483-4fbd-840f-17d283f2b3b3.gif
your jaded children will just happily and silently bear the burden
โ†“
8e00afee-1603-41a3-8efd-7f071283ad3b.gif
because itโ€™s more practical for them than the truth
โ†“
2f564b39-ba85-496f-bf21-2afd45a42492.gif
and you donโ€™t care becausei t wonโ€™t be your problem.
โ†“
c0814ae9-85e2-44a1-b9e1-86d7558992af.gif
- Solid repipe, Dad. - Itโ€™s like he has a lifetime of experience
โ†“
f2a13aa2-7944-4e33-a2ee-943f0fff9ca9.gif
as a selfish ass.
โ†“
b53bae3f-1c72-4194-89d1-73c681997820.gif
When this fails and the two of you fall in love again
โ†“
677fbbf5-fc95-444f-9e7f-f02214b85157.gif
and you attack me for taking part in this,
โ†“
1338edee-e802-488a-9464-b1557d44eed2.gif
Iโ€™m gonna lie and say I tried to talk you out of it for hours.
โ†“
d94cd555-2a5a-48a0-be53-a3b6d24409d8.gif
In truth, I donโ€™t care.
โ†“
2cd9e7ef-6abe-49a4-9d4c-466621b7cd49.gif
- Three, two... - For Godโ€™s sake, all of you, grow up.
โ†“
511a6072-1963-40cd-9994-c4a30ecb89b8.gif
- Jerry! You un rolled! - What the hell?
โ†“
886f7a13-b7dc-48ce-9840-cab7361998c3.gif
Plot twist, Deus Ex Husbanda.
โ†“
7a9dc08f-46eb-4225-ac61-24839e336a64.gif
Donโ€™t lobotomize yourselves for my comfort.
โ†“
65bd1161-ecf8-4a31-a8e7-c1038d1f78e5.gif
I may be a man but Iโ€™m also a baby and babies donโ€™t take responsibility
โ†“
f3c6dfff-e08f-48cb-9e9c-ea57a13cc50a.gif
for other peopleโ€™s suffering. I should never have said Iโ€™d kill myself
โ†“
6857b0fc-8d53-452a-aea8-ccd7ea879f1c.gif
if you left me. Itโ€™s not true.
โ†“
44f4ae86-8bc7-4c8d-97ef-191039ccd4bf.gif
All Iโ€™d do is pack my shit and cry while I look for a job on Starbuckโ€™s wifi.
โ†“
61aaee3b-5ef1-4b74-b9fe-b927a26513ce.gif
And thatโ€™s what Iโ€™m gonna do.
โ†“
3319e05b-0171-4a3f-9343-458bd1941bb8.gif
So the two of you can get clone lesbian married by a robot
โ†“
dd1fb5bc-0bc0-4fdc-b4ae-7671023dbbf0.gif
and finger yourselves on the moon while laughing in Martian French
โ†“
2637fbbe-30f5-441e-815a-e26d74aa313e.gif
- about my weird little dick! - Jerry, wait.
โ†“
446656a7-12c5-4894-8c66-6f9610a0070e.gif
- Jerry, donโ€™t leave angry. - Should I float out on a lotus leaf?
โ†“
1ad1a4a4-24f9-437e-9a84-636e9e7ed084.gif
I have to be twice as confident because my wife cheated on me with herself?
โ†“
e71a8261-3b7f-4306-a8cf-c80c022b17a9.gif
- Itโ€™s not even cheating. - You here to help? You suck.
โ†“
e3c2c69c-571b-41a4-937c-b1089f7d721e.gif
You donโ€™t even know which one is your real wife.
โ†“
9941667f-3a6c-41c6-8594-71fe175f29f0.gif
If itโ€™s me, have you been cheating with a clone?
โ†“
dafad093-370c-40f0-96ff-ed058e12339e.gif
Iโ€™m not the clone but she has a point.
โ†“
3cbfe9bb-8187-4f76-ac36-a2069ae6d302.gif
what a provocative conversation it wouldโ€™ve been great to have before
โ†“
9ab5d35f-6650-489f-9746-0c77f1a5e1fd.gif
the two of you, and I am counting two,
โ†“
ee313997-59a8-41c5-bda2-0e2f6e1c76cb.gif
gave each other unfairly expert orgasms while mocking my weird little dick!
โ†“
264bef8d-8c13-4fe8-ab50-6cc47c10daee.gif
Jerry, youโ€™re the only one who keeps saying weird and little.
โ†“
c35bfcf7-263a-4d30-8b50-b9c1c508e717.gif
Well youโ€™ve both seen it! And youโ€™ve both seen each other
โ†“
2ed8c4be-177d-46cd-9d5c-ce89e1e3ac56.gif
and now you want to tell me all about it but itโ€™s a little late.
โ†“
94f3b259-b063-4ab0-80b3-041fe4acde7d.gif
My God. Youโ€™re not mad that it was about you. Youโ€™re mad that it wasnโ€™t.
โ†“
81d9d44c-6167-4f4b-80b8-5a7ff82b1419.gif
He wanted to permit our love.
โ†“
6a2d3538-8fc8-48a1-b184-06af67d7e641.gif
Okay itโ€™s not "Handmaidโ€™s Tale" to loop in your husband.
โ†“
c2c72f01-1ddf-4a8c-ba53-71f3f0c28de2.gif
I agree for the record, we made a mistake.
โ†“
2b58bea5-2c02-49c4-850f-a5a669758ef7.gif
because we shouldโ€™ve noticed ourselves losing control and gone to Sexmaster Jerry
โ†“
ca802834-6c1b-4d1a-a859-9da4397cdae3.gif
and said oh pretty please, Jerry, can I make out with myself?
โ†“
0820a615-2b96-4c47-90e7-d9b5d4a81b03.gif
Yes you may.
โ†“
695ed78b-e004-4fe2-ae99-05cc2b96ea3e.gif
See. Not so hot when itโ€™s above board. Homewreckers.
โ†“
1066333d-4bdb-4eab-a366-d31b943f9888.gif
- So we wonโ€™t enjoy this? - Well hold on hold on, this is weird.
โ†“
75310408-9343-44fd-abc5-afaa46e0682f.gif
Weird and permitted.
โ†“
bafca825-9273-4117-abdb-ef39a9bca7cc.gif
- Wait, you like this? - Who cares what he likes.
โ†“
06fefd45-6d7d-4f0a-a952-a6b79ec6e330.gif
- I do. - I might like it
โ†“
10ce3347-dbb2-4a24-8be4-34326fe7e239.gif
- and if she likes it I permit it. - You little pervert.
โ†“
aa3978a9-c852-4107-8682-38fed26d81c6.gif
- You like a little pervert. - I like humiliating a little pervert.
โ†“
fbd0058d-9d4f-48f1-987e-78f5e971b870.gif
- I approve. Carry on. - Iโ€™m freaked out by how hot this is.
โ†“
d0e5bde3-041b-4cee-9133-d19088db5466.gif
- Am I permitted to do this? - Until further notice.
โ†“
bd75af3a-521e-4651-a4e6-f0c559f1f1d5.gif
- I love it. - Then itโ€™s permitted from now on.
โ†“
817d33f4-1e1e-40bd-84f0-5823d6daae16.gif
Because you like whatever she likes. Because youโ€™re a worm.
โ†“
c815e0cd-3313-4272-9ecb-127fdaad323e.gif
I will allow that assessment.
โ†“
d8db49c5-edd6-4bbe-b585-ee1e72b5ff32.gif
- Pass the salt? - Dammit.
โ†“
7a083081-7c85-4020-b7c1-e9c0ce5ded61.gif
- I allow this. - Well then itโ€™s required.
โ†“
baf26541-9b6b-44c0-b1ed-dba09fe8aecb.gif
I approve the requirement.
โ†“
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- You get over there. - Good idea
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- Okay. Honey? - Iโ€™m fine if you are.
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- Youโ€™re never fine, shut up. - Okay but... Okay.
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- This is not how I pictured this but... - I have zero complaints so far.
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- Because I know what you want. - I do not disagree with that.
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- Can I make a pitch? What if we... - Are you serious?
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- Is this making fun of me? - Well is that bad?
fun
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Iโ€™ll allow it.
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Jesus Christ, you need to fix the portal gun, Rick.
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Morty, you asking makes me wanna do it less.
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Okay, Thanksgiving! Letโ€™s talk about Thanksgiving!
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Whoโ€™s thankful for what? Go, Summer, you first.
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I guess Iโ€™m thankful, for like, water?
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Perfect! Wonderful! Morty, what about you?
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Fucking. Are you fucking kidding me? Why? Why?
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Discovery Channel! Discovery Channel, why?!
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Okay. Just, eat your food. Everyone eat the food.
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Sorry, I'm... this...
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Well, bye kids! Iโ€™ll keep an eye out for my grandkid in space.
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Your what? Oh! Right. Naruto.
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Thanks for visiting, Space Beth.
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Well, seems like we all learned a little lesson this weekend!
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- At least, I know I did! - Me too, Jerry. Me too.
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Hello there, Jerry! How can I help you today?
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Howdy! Just, just here to hang!
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Iโ€™m sorry, sweetie. You canโ€™t come here by yourself.
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Why not? Itโ€™s just me in there!
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Well, not that this is something youโ€™d do, but sometimes we have Jerries come here
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and try to touch other Jerries.
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No, thatโ€™s, thatโ€™s not good. Well, see you later!
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- Okay. - Thank you!