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Home » Shrek » S01E01 — Shrek

Shrek

Season 1, Episode 1 — Shrek

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Doesn't that bother you?
bother
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Nope.
nope
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- Really? - Really, really.
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- Oh. - Man, I like you. What's your name?
name
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Uh, Shrek.
shrek
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Shrek? Well, you know what I like about you, Shrek?
shrek
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You got that kind of.
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I-don't-care-what-nobody... thinks-of-me thing.
carenobodythinks
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I like that. I respect that, Shrek. You all right.
respectshrek
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Wooh! Look at that. Who'd want to live in a place like that?
liveplacewhodwooh
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That would be my home.
home
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Oh! And it is lovely! Just beautiful.
lovely
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You are quite a decorator. It's amazing what you've done with such a modest budget.
amazingbudgetmodest
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I like that Boulder. That is a nice Boulder.
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I guess you don't entertain much, do you?
entertain
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I like my privacy.
privacy
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You know, I do too. That's another thing we have in common.
anothercommon
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Like, I hate it when you got somebody in your face.
facehatesomebody
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You're trying to give them a hint, and they won't leave.
hint
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There's that awkward silence.
awkwardsilence
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- Can I stay with you? - Uh, what?
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Can I stay with you, please?
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- Of course! - Really?
course
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- No. - Please! I don't wanna go back there!
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You don't know what it's like to be considered a freak. Well, maybe you do.
consideredfreak
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But that's why we gotta stick together. You gotta let me stay!
stick
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- Please! Please! - Okay! Okay!
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- But one night only. - Ah! Thank you!
night
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- What are you... No! No! - This is gonna be fun!
fun
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We can stay up late, swapping manly stories,
latemanlystories
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and in the morning I'm making waffles.
morningwaffles
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- Oh! - Where do, uh, I sleep?
sleep
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Outside!
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Oh, well, I guess that's cool.
cool
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I mean, I don't know you, and you don't know me,
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so I guess outside is best, you know.
best
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Here I go.
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Good night.
night
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I mean, I do like the outdoors. I'm a donkey.
donkey
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I was born outside.
born
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I'll just be sitting by myself outside, I guess, you know.
sitting
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By myself, outside.
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I'm all alone There's no one here beside me.
alonebeside
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I thought I told you to stay outside.
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I am outside.
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Well, gents, it's a far cry from the farm, but what choice do we have?
choicefarmgents
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It's not home, but it'll do just fine.
homeitll
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What a lovely bed.
lovely