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Season 2, Episode 21 — My Drama Queen
'When dating a woman whose husband just died after two years in a coma
#1
⇓
'When dating a woman whose husband just died after two years in a coma
#2
⇓
you can't help but have doubts about the relationship.'
#3
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you can't help but have doubts about the relationship.'
#4
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'All you can do is be a man and face those doubts head-on.'
#5
⇓
'All you can do is be a man and face those doubts head-on.'
#6
⇓
-What are you thinking about? -Eggs.
#7
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-What are you thinking about? -Eggs.
#8
⇓
One minute they're bad for you, now everybody's, "Hey, you tried eggs? They're great!" It's crazy. Eggs....
#9
⇓
One minute they're bad for you, now everybody's, "Hey, you tried eggs? They're great!" It's crazy. Eggs....
#10
⇓
-You know what? Forget I asked. -What?
#11
⇓
-You know what? Forget I asked. -What?
#12
⇓
-JD, I really wanted tonight to be romantic.
#13
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-JD, I really wanted tonight to be romantic.
#14
⇓
-Sweetie, it is! Now, exactly how much feeling
#15
⇓
-Sweetie, it is! Now, exactly how much feeling
#16
⇓
am I supposed to lose in my extremities?
#17
⇓
am I supposed to lose in my extremities?
#18
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-Just enough so it still hurts.
#19
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-Just enough so it still hurts.
#20
⇓
(DIRTY ROCK MUSIC)
#21
⇓
'Still, things are going pretty well with me and Jamie.'
#22
⇓
'Still, things are going pretty well with me and Jamie.'
#23
⇓
-Looks like rope-burn to me.
#24
⇓
-Oh, no, this a rash from my new watch.
#25
⇓
-Oh, no, this a rash from my new watch.
#26
⇓
They didn't tell me the band was made out of...
#27
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They didn't tell me the band was made out of...
#28
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..cat. -Elliot, check out these wedding dresses.
#29
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..cat. -Elliot, check out these wedding dresses.
#30
⇓
-Eeeerh! -I am so proud of you! -This is exactly like the dress I bought! Huh!
#31
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-Eeeerh! -I am so proud of you! -This is exactly like the dress I bought! Huh!
#32
⇓
-Eeeerh! -I am so proud of you! -This is exactly like the dress I bought! Huh!
#33
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-Hm? -I didn't already buy a wedding dress.
#34
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I'm not even dating anybody, so that would be crazy, whether it was half-off, or not....
#35
⇓
I'm not even dating anybody, so that would be crazy, whether it was half-off, or not....
#36
⇓
I'm not even dating anybody, so that would be crazy, whether it was half-off, or not....
#37
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-There's not one good thing about her planning a wedding I can't afford.
#38
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-There's not one good thing about her planning a wedding I can't afford.
#39
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-Turk, I know it's silly and I know it's only for one day,
#40
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-Turk, I know it's silly and I know it's only for one day,
#41
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but since I was a little girl, all I wanted was to have a big wedding.
#42
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but since I was a little girl, all I wanted was to have a big wedding.
#43
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-What's the name of that designer you love so much? She made that gown? Vera...?
#44
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-What's the name of that designer you love so much? She made that gown? Vera...?
#45
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-Wang. (BOTH GIGGLE CHILDISHLY)
#46
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-Wang. (BOTH GIGGLE CHILDISHLY)
#47
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-You're the only two doctors immature enough to laugh at "Vera Wang."
#48
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-You're the only two doctors immature enough to laugh at "Vera Wang."
#49
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-Hello.
#50
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-Go ahead. -What? I think Vera Wang makes very beautiful gowns.
#51
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-Go ahead. -What? I think Vera Wang makes very beautiful gowns.
#52
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Plus, her last name's a funny word for "penis". Who's with me?
#53
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Plus, her last name's a funny word for "penis". Who's with me?
#54
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Air-five! Stsh! Stsh! Stsh!
#55
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Air-five! Stsh! Stsh! Stsh!
#56
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-Shorts, huh? -Yeah.
#57
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I don't get shorts, cos I'm a lowly janitor? -I didn't say "lowly".
#58
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I don't get shorts, cos I'm a lowly janitor? -I didn't say "lowly".
#59
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-Oh, so now I'm a janitor? -Yes! Have you been drinking?
#60
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-Oh, so now I'm a janitor? -Yes! Have you been drinking?
#61
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-I'm not drunk. -I love your shorts, OK?
#62
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-I'm not drunk. -I love your shorts, OK?
#63
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I wish I had a pair just like 'em. -Hm.
#64
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I wish I had a pair just like 'em. -Hm.
#65
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-OK, Mr Westfeld, now the angioplasty went well, but here's the thing,
#66
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-OK, Mr Westfeld, now the angioplasty went well, but here's the thing,
#67
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it is on you, partner. You gotta watch what you eat so we
#68
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it is on you, partner. You gotta watch what you eat so we
#69
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can kick this thing in the ass, OK? -It's on you, partner!
#70
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can kick this thing in the ass, OK? -It's on you, partner!
#71
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-Oh, gosh, Shannon, thank you so much for clarifying my point
#72
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-Oh, gosh, Shannon, thank you so much for clarifying my point
#73
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by repeating it word for word.
#74
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by repeating it word for word.
#75
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In a reciprocal gesture, can I be included in your coming out party?
#76
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In a reciprocal gesture, can I be included in your coming out party?
#77
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-Is that a gay joke?
#78
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-No, it's a cotillion joke. My God, Newbie, it's been two furiously frustrating years,
#79
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-No, it's a cotillion joke. My God, Newbie, it's been two furiously frustrating years,
#80
⇓
how is it possible you still don't get me?
#81
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how is it possible you still don't get me?
#82
⇓
I'd never compare you to the gays! I like the gays, I like their music,
#83
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I'd never compare you to the gays! I like the gays, I like their music,
#84
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I like their style, and what they've done with Halloween,
#85
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I like their style, and what they've done with Halloween,
#86
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but our thing is that you're girl. That's who you are! But that's not....
#87
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but our thing is that you're girl. That's who you are! But that's not....
#88
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but our thing is that you're girl. That's who you are! But that's not....
#89
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'Man, once Dr. Cox gets on a roll, -there's nothing that can derail him.'
#90
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'Man, once Dr. Cox gets on a roll, -there's nothing that can derail him.'
#91
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-My mom died.
#92
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'Except that.'
#93
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# I can't do this all on my own
#94
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# I can't do this all on my own
#95
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# No, I know
#96
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# No, I know
#97
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# I'm no Superman
#98
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# I'm no Superman
#99
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Thank you all for coming, I know you're busy.
#100
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'The toughest part about working in a hospital is,
#101
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'The toughest part about working in a hospital is,
#102
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no matter what else is going on in your life, you have to dive back into things.'
#103
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no matter what else is going on in your life, you have to dive back into things.'
#104
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no matter what else is going on in your life, you have to dive back into things.'
#105
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-So anyway, you said you like mine, and I had the wife whip you up a pair of your own. You like 'em?
#106
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-So anyway, you said you like mine, and I had the wife whip you up a pair of your own. You like 'em?
#107
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-Do I like 'em? Why, just the other day I was asking myself,
#108
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-Do I like 'em? Why, just the other day I was asking myself,
#109
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"How can I show my package so it's alluring and professional?"
#110
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"How can I show my package so it's alluring and professional?"
#111
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-Well, there's your answer. -Urgh!
#112
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-Well, there's your answer. -Urgh!
#113
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(LAUGHS)
#114
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Ah, to be young and in shorts.
#115
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Ah, to be young and in shorts.
#116
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-Are you ready for bed? -Oh, I'm ready.
#117
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-Are you ready for bed? -Oh, I'm ready.
#118
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'A lot can change in a week.'
#119
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-Scoot!
#120
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-Scoot!
#121
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Can you hand my mouth guard to me?
#122
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Can you hand my mouth guard to me?
#123
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'Uh, ew!'
#124
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-Thanks.
#125
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-Thanks.
#126
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(SLURPS)
#127
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-If things have fizzled, I could scout her out, figure the problem.
#128
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-If things have fizzled, I could scout her out, figure the problem.
#129
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-Things haven't fizzled. Last night, we made ice cubes out of orange juice, so, step off.
#130
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-Things haven't fizzled. Last night, we made ice cubes out of orange juice, so, step off.
#131
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-Things haven't fizzled. Last night, we made ice cubes out of orange juice, so, step off.
#132
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-OK, gang, before we begin, Doctor Kelso wants me to remind you
#133
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-OK, gang, before we begin, Doctor Kelso wants me to remind you
#134
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of the legal ramifications of all your teensy snafus.
#135
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of the legal ramifications of all your teensy snafus.
#136
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-"Teensy snafus"? Good God, Ted,
#137
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-"Teensy snafus"? Good God, Ted,
#138
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it's not a Doctor Seuss story.
#139
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it's not a Doctor Seuss story.
#140
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Now, listen up, name tags, over 50% of our lawsuits
#141
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Now, listen up, name tags, over 50% of our lawsuits
#142
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can be traced back to poor patient-doctor communication.
#143
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can be traced back to poor patient-doctor communication.
#144
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To that end, if any of you feel the need to flap your babble holes,
#145
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To that end, if any of you feel the need to flap your babble holes,
#146
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you'll be joining me in my new daily seminar on doctor-patient relations.
#147
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you'll be joining me in my new daily seminar on doctor-patient relations.
#148
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My first invitee will be Dr Murphy, whom I recently overheard
#149
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My first invitee will be Dr Murphy, whom I recently overheard
#150
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telling someone, "Stop bleeding, oh, God, stop bleeding." -It was a gusher.
#151
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telling someone, "Stop bleeding, oh, God, stop bleeding." -It was a gusher.
#152
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-Next catastrophe. Idiots!
#153
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-Next catastrophe. Idiots!
#154
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-I hate him so much.
#155
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-I hate him so much.
#156
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-Save it for our weekend bike ride.
#157
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-Save it for our weekend bike ride.
#158
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Dr Cox, want to try one of my world famous devilled eggs?
#159
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Dr Cox, want to try one of my world famous devilled eggs?
#160
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-No, I've already had diarrhoea.
#161
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-No, I've already had diarrhoea.
#162
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Carla, I just wanted to see how you're, uh...
#163
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Carla, I just wanted to see how you're, uh...
#164
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It's always tough when you have to bury your old mom, isn't it?
#165
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It's always tough when you have to bury your old mom, isn't it?
#166
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-Mm hmm.
#167
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-Mm hmm.
#168
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What was your mother's funeral like? -Wouldn't know, skipped it. But my aunt told my father it was moving.
#169
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What was your mother's funeral like? -Wouldn't know, skipped it. But my aunt told my father it was moving.
#170
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What was your mother's funeral like? -Wouldn't know, skipped it. But my aunt told my father it was moving.
#171
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-Oh, gosh!
#172
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-Oh, gosh!
#173
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(BOTH LAUGH)
#174
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(BOTH LAUGH)
#175
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'Wow, the past and the present.'
#176
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'Whenever I see two women I've been intimate with talking, I have the same fantasy.'
#177
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'Whenever I see two women I've been intimate with talking, I have the same fantasy.'
#178
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'Whenever I see two women I've been intimate with talking, I have the same fantasy.'
#179
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C'mon, ladies! It's right hand, left hand, shoulder pop, jump!
#180
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C'mon, ladies! It's right hand, left hand, shoulder pop, jump!
#181
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Right hand, left hand, shoulder pop, jump!
#182
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Right hand, left hand, shoulder pop, jump!
#183
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# Get up, get on up
#184
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# Get up, get on up
#185
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# Stay on the scene, get on up
#186
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# Stay on the scene, get on up
#187
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# Like a sex machine, get on up
#188
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# Get up #
#189
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# Get up #
#190
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What you talking about? -Not the Rerun dance.
#191
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What you talking about? -Not the Rerun dance.
#192
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'I tell her way too much.' -You left stuff at my apartment.
#193
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'I tell her way too much.' -You left stuff at my apartment.
#194
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-Thanks. -See ya. -Mmm.
#195
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-Thanks. -See ya. -Mmm.
#196
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-Wanna know why things with Jamie are lamey? -We're fine.
#197
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-Wanna know why things with Jamie are lamey? -We're fine.
#198
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-She's clearing you out! -Wrong!
#199
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She came by because she knows today at work I need my... squash goggles
#200
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She came by because she knows today at work I need my... squash goggles
#201
⇓
-Hmm. -I have to saw something later.
#202
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-Hmm. -I have to saw something later.
#203
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-She's a drama queen. When her husband was in a coma it was exciting,
#204
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-She's a drama queen. When her husband was in a coma it was exciting,
#205
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but now that it's OK for the two of you to be together, it's got no snap.
#206
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but now that it's OK for the two of you to be together, it's got no snap.
#207
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but now that it's OK for the two of you to be together, it's got no snap.
#208
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It's got no crackle.
#209
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JD, it's got no pop.
#210
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JD, it's got no pop.
#211
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I know, because I'm a drama queen, too.
#212
⇓
I know, because I'm a drama queen, too.
#213
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-Well, Jamie's not like you, OK?
#214
⇓
-Well, Jamie's not like you, OK?
#215
⇓
-No pop! -De-de-de-de!
#216
⇓
-No pop! -De-de-de-de!
#217
⇓
-Nine pounds in a week!
#218
⇓
-Nine pounds in a week!
#219
⇓
Let me ask you a quick question? Are you trying to make my head explode?
#220
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Let me ask you a quick question? Are you trying to make my head explode?
#221
⇓
Cos you have no idea how frustrating it is working your ass off
#222
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Cos you have no idea how frustrating it is working your ass off
#223
⇓
trying to inflate a tiny balloon inside someone's clogged artery,
#224
⇓
trying to inflate a tiny balloon inside someone's clogged artery,
#225
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and all that person has to do is, I don't know, go for a walk in the morning,
#226
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and all that person has to do is, I don't know, go for a walk in the morning,
#227
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or choke down a fresh green salad and you come back looking like that!
#228
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or choke down a fresh green salad and you come back looking like that!
#229
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And I know, I know, here I'm supposed to be Doctor Give-A-Crap,
#230
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And I know, I know, here I'm supposed to be Doctor Give-A-Crap,
#231
⇓
you wanna know the truth and this is a fact,
#232
⇓
you wanna know the truth and this is a fact,
#233
⇓
you are what you eat, and you went and devoured a big fat guy, didn't ya?
#234
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you are what you eat, and you went and devoured a big fat guy, didn't ya?
#235
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-See, Doctor Cox, this is, uh, the sort of hostile behaviour
#236
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-See, Doctor Cox, this is, uh, the sort of hostile behaviour
#237
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that can cause us legal difficulty.
#238
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-Ted, I just may rip that tie off and jam it down your oesophagus.
#239
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-Ted, I just may rip that tie off and jam it down your oesophagus.
#240
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-Ted, I just may rip that tie off and jam it down your oesophagus.
#241
⇓
-I think you proved at Nurse Roberts' pool party that that doesn't solve anything.
#242
⇓
-I think you proved at Nurse Roberts' pool party that that doesn't solve anything.
#243
⇓
-Dammit, you can't just go around browbeating nut jobs and bullying fatties.
#244
⇓
-Dammit, you can't just go around browbeating nut jobs and bullying fatties.
#245
⇓
-I'm not a resident, so I'm not going to your seminar, so, in essence there, big Bob,
#246
⇓
-I'm not a resident, so I'm not going to your seminar, so, in essence there, big Bob,
#247
⇓
-I'm not a resident, so I'm not going to your seminar, so, in essence there, big Bob,
#248
⇓
there's really nothing you can do to me at all, is there?
#249
⇓
there's really nothing you can do to me at all, is there?
#250
⇓
Hello, class, my name is Doctor Perry Cox,
#251
⇓
Hello, class, my name is Doctor Perry Cox,
#252
⇓
I'm going to be your teacher.
#253
⇓
No. No.
#254
⇓
No. No.
#255
⇓
No!
#256
⇓
No!
#257
⇓
(SIGHS)
#258
⇓
-Hey.
#259
⇓
-Hey.
#260
⇓
You OK? -Great! What are you doing home so early?
#261
⇓
You OK? -Great! What are you doing home so early?
#262
⇓
-I just came to check on you. You looking at pictures?
#263
⇓
-I just came to check on you. You looking at pictures?
#264
⇓
-Yeah.
#265
⇓
I know she was old.
#266
⇓
I know she was old.
#267
⇓
Still she was my best friend.
#268
⇓
Still she was my best friend.
#269
⇓
I mean, what are you supposed to do without your mom?
#270
⇓
I mean, what are you supposed to do without your mom?
#271
⇓
-You can let your man fill a little bit of the hole that she left.
#272
⇓
-You can let your man fill a little bit of the hole that she left.
#273
⇓
-She would like that.
#274
⇓
-She would like that.
#275
⇓
-Baby, she hated me. -Yeah, she did.
#276
⇓
-Baby, she hated me. -Yeah, she did.
#277
⇓
-Holy sh... -Shh!
#278
⇓
-Holy sh... -Shh!
#279
⇓
(WHISPERS) Didn't mean to scare you. (WHISPERS) Why are we whispering?
#280
⇓
(WHISPERS) Didn't mean to scare you. (WHISPERS) Why are we whispering?
#281
⇓
-I wanted to see if you would whisper because I did. -I think I would.
#282
⇓
-I wanted to see if you would whisper because I did. -I think I would.
#283
⇓
-Anyway, what's the deal? We're supposed to be shorts buddies today.
#284
⇓
-Anyway, what's the deal? We're supposed to be shorts buddies today.
#285
⇓
Monday, Tuesday shorts, Wednesday wash 'em, Thursday, Friday shorts,
#286
⇓
Monday, Tuesday shorts, Wednesday wash 'em, Thursday, Friday shorts,
#287
⇓
weekend optional. I'll be wearing shorts. -I was gonna wear 'em,
#288
⇓
weekend optional. I'll be wearing shorts. -I was gonna wear 'em,
#289
⇓
but someone stole 'em. -What? -Yes! -Let me see.
#290
⇓
but someone stole 'em. -What? -Yes! -Let me see.
#291
⇓
'As a doctor, you get -good at thinking on your feet.'
#292
⇓
'As a doctor, you get -good at thinking on your feet.'
#293
⇓
'I was able to protect the Janitor's feelings. He totally bought it.'
#294
⇓
'I was able to protect the Janitor's feelings. He totally bought it.'
#295
⇓
-Mentiroso!
#296
⇓
-This burger's really meaty.
#297
⇓
-This burger's really meaty.
#298
⇓
I'm serious, you can really taste all the meat.
#299
⇓
I'm serious, you can really taste all the meat.
#300
⇓
-I'm gonna go put my sweats on. -You're already wearing sweats.
#301
⇓
-I'm gonna go put my sweats on. -You're already wearing sweats.
#302
⇓
-I gotta get up early, so maybe you should crash at your place tonight.
#303
⇓
-I gotta get up early, so maybe you should crash at your place tonight.
#304
⇓
'Well look, she probably does have -to get up early, so, just be cool.'
#305
⇓
'Well look, she probably does have -to get up early, so, just be cool.'
#306
⇓
I'm sorry, it was an accident, I...
#307
⇓
I'm sorry, it was an accident, I...
#308
⇓
-Don't lie, I asked you to go, so you punched through my coffee table.
#309
⇓
-Don't lie, I asked you to go, so you punched through my coffee table.
#310
⇓
'Oh, my God, she does want drama.'
#311
⇓
'Oh, my God, she does want drama.'
#312
⇓
Sometimes you make me so crazy!
#313
⇓
Sometimes you make me so crazy!
#314
⇓
-Come here, I'll take care of you.
#315
⇓
-Come here, I'll take care of you.
#316
⇓
'This is totally normal.'
#317
⇓
'This is totally normal.'
#318
⇓
'I mean, in relationships you have to roll with the punches.'
#319
⇓
'I mean, in relationships you have to roll with the punches.'
#320
⇓
'Even the ones you don't see coming.'
#321
⇓
-If there were anything I could do to make you feel better, I'd do it.
#322
⇓
-If there were anything I could do to make you feel better, I'd do it.
#323
⇓
-Let's get married now.
#324
⇓
-Let's get married now.
#325
⇓
-She wants to get married now?! -She says it's romantic to be spontaneous.
#326
⇓
-She wants to get married now?! -She says it's romantic to be spontaneous.
#327
⇓
-She wants to get married now?! -She says it's romantic to be spontaneous.
#328
⇓
-That is romantic. So, how pregnant is she?
#329
⇓
-She's not pregnant. I was getting really psyched for this wedding.
#330
⇓
-She's not pregnant. I was getting really psyched for this wedding.
#331
⇓
The dancing, you would've hooked up with one of Carla's sisters.-Which one? -The drunkest one.
#332
⇓
The dancing, you would've hooked up with one of Carla's sisters.-Which one? -The drunkest one.
#333
⇓
The dancing, you would've hooked up with one of Carla's sisters.-Which one? -The drunkest one.
#334
⇓
Plus, now there's no bachelor party, and you being best man would've hooked it up.
#335
⇓
Plus, now there's no bachelor party, and you being best man would've hooked it up.
#336
⇓
-Alright, guys, let's make it happen.
#337
⇓
-Alright, guys, let's make it happen.
#338
⇓
# "Sex Machine" - James Brown
#339
⇓
-Dude!
#340
⇓
-Dude!
#341
⇓
-It would've been awesome.
#342
⇓
-It would've been awesome.
#343
⇓
-I'm having a hard time getting excited, know what I mean?
#344
⇓
-I'm having a hard time getting excited, know what I mean?
#345
⇓
-You work here so we could do the ceremony for about $40.
#346
⇓
-You work here so we could do the ceremony for about $40.
#347
⇓
-Praise Jesus!
#348
⇓
'As for my relationship, I was doing -anything to keep the drama alive.'
#349
⇓
'As for my relationship, I was doing -anything to keep the drama alive.'
#350
⇓
Jamie and I are gonna be together, and I don't care what you think, Mom.
#351
⇓
Jamie and I are gonna be together, and I don't care what you think, Mom.
#352
⇓
Because I don't want salad, that's why. (GASPS)
#353
⇓
Because I don't want salad, that's why. (GASPS)
#354
⇓
-Jamie and I are gonna be together, and I don't care what you think, Dad.
#355
⇓
-Jamie and I are gonna be together, and I don't care what you think, Dad.
#356
⇓
I'm warning you, stop eyeballing my woman.
#357
⇓
-Actually, JD, I think it was that guy.
#358
⇓
-Actually, JD, I think it was that guy.
#359
⇓
-No, it was definitely that guy.
#360
⇓
-No, it was definitely that guy.
#361
⇓
'Unfortunately, I was running out of ideas.'
#362
⇓
'Unfortunately, I was running out of ideas.'
#363
⇓
-So how is the drama queen doing? -I don't know, how are you? Zing!
#364
⇓
-So how is the drama queen doing? -I don't know, how are you? Zing!
#365
⇓
-Why can't you just admit I'm right? -Because you're not right.
#366
⇓
-Why can't you just admit I'm right? -Because you're not right.
#367
⇓
-No pop!
#368
⇓
-No pop!
#369
⇓
-What the hell was that all about?
#370
⇓
-What the hell was that all about?
#371
⇓
'I wouldn't stoop this low for drama.'
#372
⇓
We used to be a couple and, now, guess who wants me back?
#373
⇓
We used to be a couple and, now, guess who wants me back?
#374
⇓
'Fine, I'd stoop.' -Oh, she better watch it.
#375
⇓
'Fine, I'd stoop.' -Oh, she better watch it.
#376
⇓
-Honey, I don't want you using the stove on your own.
#377
⇓
-Honey, I don't want you using the stove on your own.
#378
⇓
-I asked for a pillow an hour ago. -I'm talking to my husband.
#379
⇓
-I asked for a pillow an hour ago. -I'm talking to my husband.
#380
⇓
So, why don't you get your own damn pillow?! What?
#381
⇓
So, why don't you get your own damn pillow?! What?
#382
⇓
-And they stuck you in here for that?
#383
⇓
-And they stuck you in here for that?
#384
⇓
-I apologized to the man. Anybody can have a bad day!
#385
⇓
-And what about you there, Beavis? -Oh, uh...
#386
⇓
-And what about you there, Beavis? -Oh, uh...
#387
⇓
-You know, doctor, I'm getting a little tired of the sexual innuendo.
#388
⇓
-You know, doctor, I'm getting a little tired of the sexual innuendo.
#389
⇓
-In your endo.
#390
⇓
-That's great stuff.
#391
⇓
-That's great stuff.
#392
⇓
Ted, why don't you be a sport and get us started?
#393
⇓
Ted, why don't you be a sport and get us started?
#394
⇓
(CLEARS THROAT) Uh, people,...
#395
⇓
(CLEARS THROAT) Uh, people,...
#396
⇓
we're here today - -Snore! New idea,
#397
⇓
we're here today - -Snore! New idea,
#398
⇓
we're all gonna clam up so I can get some shuteye.
#399
⇓
we're all gonna clam up so I can get some shuteye.
#400
⇓
And nervous guy? -Yes, Dr Cox? -If I were you, I'd go ahead
#401
⇓
And nervous guy? -Yes, Dr Cox? -If I were you, I'd go ahead
#402
⇓
swallow that mouthful of carrots cos if I hear you make one more crunch,
#403
⇓
swallow that mouthful of carrots cos if I hear you make one more crunch,
#404
⇓
I'm gonna use the remainder of the carrots to make you completely airtight, son.
#405
⇓
I'm gonna use the remainder of the carrots to make you completely airtight, son.
#406
⇓
(CHOKES)
#407
⇓
-Hey, Jamie. -Hey, slut.
#408
⇓
-Hey, Jamie. -Hey, slut.
#409
⇓
-I can explain why Jamie said that.
#410
⇓
-I can explain why Jamie said that.
#411
⇓
Know how Turk says, "Hey, playa" when he means, "Hey, buddy"? -Yeah.
#412
⇓
Know how Turk says, "Hey, playa" when he means, "Hey, buddy"? -Yeah.
#413
⇓
-Well, Jamie's from Cincinnati and in Cincinnati they say, "Hey, slut."
#414
⇓
-Well, Jamie's from Cincinnati and in Cincinnati they say, "Hey, slut."
#415
⇓
-Oh. Neat.
#416
⇓
-Turk, are you sure you're happy we're doing this?
#417
⇓
-Turk, are you sure you're happy we're doing this?
#418
⇓
-Are you kidding me? This is my ideal wedding. It's cheap, no hassle,
#419
⇓
-Are you kidding me? This is my ideal wedding. It's cheap, no hassle,
#420
⇓
plus, you said you'd call my mom and explain she wasn't invited. -Didn't.
#421
⇓
plus, you said you'd call my mom and explain she wasn't invited. -Didn't.
#422
⇓
What's in it for me? -This!
#423
⇓
What's in it for me? -This!
#424
⇓
(GASPS)
#425
⇓
(GASPS)
#426
⇓
My God! -Mm hmm.
#427
⇓
Give me the phone, I'll call her right now.
#428
⇓
Give me the phone, I'll call her right now.
#429
⇓
-You are such a momma's boy. -Please.
#430
⇓
-You are such a momma's boy. -Please.
#431
⇓
Dial "Mommy."
#432
⇓
-Dammit, Perry, you're there to teach!
#433
⇓
-Dammit, Perry, you're there to teach!
#434
⇓
If I wanted somebody to lay around doing nothing, I'd have wheeled in a corpse, or my housekeeper, Rosalba.
#435
⇓
If I wanted somebody to lay around doing nothing, I'd have wheeled in a corpse, or my housekeeper, Rosalba.
#436
⇓
If I wanted somebody to lay around doing nothing, I'd have wheeled in a corpse, or my housekeeper, Rosalba.
#437
⇓
-Captain Clip On, did you go ahead and tattle on me?
#438
⇓
-Captain Clip On, did you go ahead and tattle on me?
#439
⇓
-Oh, please, with the shocked look.
#440
⇓
News flash, I'm sterile.
#441
⇓
News flash, I'm sterile.
#442
⇓
I mean gutless.
#443
⇓
I mean gutless.
#444
⇓
My guys swim in circles.
#445
⇓
My guys swim in circles.
#446
⇓
I think it's the bike riding.
#447
⇓
I think it's the bike riding.
#448
⇓
Hey, Elliot. -Hey, slut.
#449
⇓
-Excuse me? -Uh, Carla, could you give me and Elliot a second,
#450
⇓
-Excuse me? -Uh, Carla, could you give me and Elliot a second,
#451
⇓
I got to talk to her privately. Thank you.
#452
⇓
I got to talk to her privately. Thank you.
#453
⇓
Hey, uh, I just wanted to say you were right about Jamie. -Why does Jamie think you're here?
#454
⇓
Hey, uh, I just wanted to say you were right about Jamie. -Why does Jamie think you're here?
#455
⇓
Hey, uh, I just wanted to say you were right about Jamie. -Why does Jamie think you're here?
#456
⇓
-Asking you not to show up drunk and crying. You know what's weird?
#457
⇓
-Asking you not to show up drunk and crying. You know what's weird?
#458
⇓
I really like this girl, but I'm not sure I can keep it going with all the drama.
#459
⇓
I really like this girl, but I'm not sure I can keep it going with all the drama.
#460
⇓
-You have to gamble that once the drama's gone, there'll be something.
#461
⇓
-You have to gamble that once the drama's gone, there'll be something.
#462
⇓
If not, it's her loss.
#463
⇓
If not, it's her loss.
#464
⇓
Still, if it helps.
#465
⇓
-Thanks. -Mm hmm.
#466
⇓
-Thanks. -Mm hmm.
#467
⇓
OK, here we go.
#468
⇓
When hospital employees fail to communicate with patients,
#469
⇓
When hospital employees fail to communicate with patients,
#470
⇓
ethical and legal ramifications can lead to financial hardships
#471
⇓
ethical and legal ramifications can lead to financial hardships
#472
⇓
for the institution and personal grievances against its...
#473
⇓
for the institution and personal grievances against its...
#474
⇓
..doctors. Huh? -Dr Cox, this is useless, I thought we were going to learn.
#475
⇓
..doctors. Huh? -Dr Cox, this is useless, I thought we were going to learn.
#476
⇓
-Barbie, why'd they toss you in here?
#477
⇓
-Barbie, why'd they toss you in here?
#478
⇓
-Oh, they didn't. I'm, uh,...
#479
⇓
..uh, I'm auditing.
#480
⇓
..uh, I'm auditing.
#481
⇓
-Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine.
#482
⇓
-Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine.
#483
⇓
You wanna know the real skinny?
#484
⇓
If you wanna be good doctors and nurses, you'd better get ready to get in trouble a lot,
#485
⇓
If you wanna be good doctors and nurses, you'd better get ready to get in trouble a lot,
#486
⇓
If you wanna be good doctors and nurses, you'd better get ready to get in trouble a lot,
#487
⇓
because patients are stupid and really scared.
#488
⇓
Some need you to hold their hands, you should.
#489
⇓
Some need you to hold their hands, you should.
#490
⇓
Others need you to kick their asses and you should.
#491
⇓
Others need you to kick their asses and you should.
#492
⇓
Really all comes down to whether you've the guts to say exactly
#493
⇓
Really all comes down to whether you've the guts to say exactly
#494
⇓
what you know in your heart you should say.
#495
⇓
what you know in your heart you should say.
#496
⇓
-So, Ted,
#497
⇓
how's Professor Cox doing? -Excellent, sir.
#498
⇓
how's Professor Cox doing? -Excellent, sir.
#499
⇓
-Ha ha! -And you know what else?
#500
⇓
-Ha ha! -And you know what else?
#501
⇓
I quit. -No, you don't. -Well, I'm leaving early today.
#502
⇓
I quit. -No, you don't. -Well, I'm leaving early today.
#503
⇓
-No, you're coming to my office and doing busy work. -I'm getting a soda first.
#504
⇓
-No, you're coming to my office and doing busy work. -I'm getting a soda first.
#505
⇓
-No, you're coming to my office and doing busy work. -I'm getting a soda first.
#506
⇓
-Whatever.
#507
⇓
# "Don't You (Forget About Me)" - -Simple Minds
#508
⇓
# "Don't You (Forget About Me)" - -Simple Minds
#509
⇓
-Doctor. -Janitor.
#510
⇓
What's that smell?
#511
⇓
What's that smell?
#512
⇓
-I don't know, although it smells a little bit like... the truth.
#513
⇓
-I don't know, although it smells a little bit like... the truth.
#514
⇓
-Ugh! -My poor wife slaved over these!
#515
⇓
-Ugh! -My poor wife slaved over these!
#516
⇓
-She cut a pair of scrubs and hemmed the bottom, what's the big deal?
#517
⇓
-She cut a pair of scrubs and hemmed the bottom, what's the big deal?
#518
⇓
-What's the big deal? The Lord didn't bless my wife with all ten fingers.
#519
⇓
-What's the big deal? The Lord didn't bless my wife with all ten fingers.
#520
⇓
She's only got pointer and thumb-pinky.
#521
⇓
She's only got pointer and thumb-pinky.
#522
⇓
-Look, I'm sorry, OK, for so many things.
#523
⇓
-Look, I'm sorry, OK, for so many things.
#524
⇓
But I'm a doctor, I can't wear shorts to work.
#525
⇓
But I'm a doctor, I can't wear shorts to work.
#526
⇓
-You can't wear shorts to work? -Nope.
#527
⇓
-You can't wear shorts to work? -Nope.
#528
⇓
Not allowed.
#529
⇓
Not allowed.
#530
⇓
-Thanks. What's up with the man thong?
#531
⇓
-Oh, nothing, I'm just trying to mend some fences.
#532
⇓
-Oh, nothing, I'm just trying to mend some fences.
#533
⇓
-So, do you think Elliot's somewhere right now, crying her eyes out?
#534
⇓
-So, do you think Elliot's somewhere right now, crying her eyes out?
#535
⇓
-So, do you think Elliot's somewhere right now, crying her eyes out?
#536
⇓
-Oh, without a doubt.
#537
⇓
But not about me.
#538
⇓
But not about me.
#539
⇓
Oh, I... I kinda made all that stuff up
#540
⇓
Oh, I... I kinda made all that stuff up
#541
⇓
It just seems you and I only click when something crazy's going on.
#542
⇓
It just seems you and I only click when something crazy's going on.
#543
⇓
-Oh. -And I guess I've realized I don't really wanna be in a relationship like that.
#544
⇓
-Oh. -And I guess I've realized I don't really wanna be in a relationship like that.
#545
⇓
-Oh. -And I guess I've realized I don't really wanna be in a relationship like that.
#546
⇓
-Is that an ultimatum? -No, Jamie,
#547
⇓
no, it's not an ultimatum, it's just something to think about.
#548
⇓
no, it's not an ultimatum, it's just something to think about.
#549
⇓
(WATCH BEEPS)
#550
⇓
(WATCH BEEPS)
#551
⇓
Oh, shoot, I gotta go.
#552
⇓
Oh, shoot, I gotta go.
#553
⇓
-You guys are having problems?
#554
⇓
-You guys are having problems?
#555
⇓
-Yeah.
#556
⇓
-Hey, sorry I'm late.
#557
⇓
-Hey, sorry I'm late.
#558
⇓
-It's just not a wedding without a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader is it?
#559
⇓
-It's just not a wedding without a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader is it?
#560
⇓
-Ready, sweetie? -Since the day I met you.
#561
⇓
-Ready, sweetie? -Since the day I met you.
#562
⇓
'Sometimes it takes a priest to keep -you from making a big mistake.'
#563
⇓
'Sometimes it takes a priest to keep -you from making a big mistake.'
#564
⇓
-Christopher, before we begin, will you remind me of the bride's name.
#565
⇓
-Christopher, before we begin, will you remind me of the bride's name.
#566
⇓
-Carla.
#567
⇓
-I know it's silly and it's only for one day,
#568
⇓
-I know it's silly and it's only for one day,
#569
⇓
but since I was little, all I wanted was to have a beautiful wedding.
#570
⇓
but since I was little, all I wanted was to have a beautiful wedding.
#571
⇓
-Baby, you don't wanna do this. -What?
#572
⇓
-Baby, you don't wanna do this. -What?
#573
⇓
-Since your mother passed, you probably felt like you don't have any family,
#574
⇓
-Since your mother passed, you probably felt like you don't have any family,
#575
⇓
but I'm family, whether we do it now, or wait and do it like you wanted.
#576
⇓
but I'm family, whether we do it now, or wait and do it like you wanted.
#577
⇓
but I'm family, whether we do it now, or wait and do it like you wanted.
#578
⇓
-Holy cow, talk about your gigantic time wasters.
#579
⇓
-Holy cow, talk about your gigantic time wasters.
#580
⇓
-Tell me about it. -Come on. Lighten up, slut.
#581
⇓
-Tell me about it. -Come on. Lighten up, slut.
#582
⇓
-What, now?
#583
⇓
'I think relationships can be defined -by big moments that don't happen.'
#584
⇓
'I think relationships can be defined -by big moments that don't happen.'
#585
⇓
'Or by the little ones that do.'
#586
⇓
-Ah, that's the stuff.
#587
⇓
-Ah, that's the stuff.
#588
⇓
'But once you get past the drama, -it's actually pretty simple.'
#589
⇓
'But once you get past the drama, -it's actually pretty simple.'
#590
⇓
'All we have to do
#591
⇓
'All we have to do
#592
⇓
is whatever it takes to make her happy.'
#593
⇓
-Four thousand six hundred and six...?!
#594
⇓
-Four thousand six hundred and six...?!
#595
⇓
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
#596
⇓
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
#597
⇓
Edited by Access Innovation Media www.ai-media.tv
#598
⇓
Edited by Access Innovation Media www.ai-media.tv
#599
⇓
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