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Smiling Friends
» S03E09 โ Friend-Bot (Version 12589218731809213528796879521)
Smiling Friends
Season 3, Episode 9 โ Friend-Bot (Version 12589218731809213528796879521)
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Show:
Smiling Friends
Episode title:
Friend-Bot (Version 12589218731809213528796879521)
Air date:
April 12, 2026
Director:
David Hootselle
Top billed cast:
Michael Cusack, Zach Hadel, Marc Moceri
[LOGLINE REDACTED FOR VIOLATING TERMS AND SERVICES]
Source:
TMDB
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I don't know what... I don't know why all the disco's over, what?
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Wow, cool.
cool
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Hey, Charlie, how's it going?
charlie
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-Yo. Not too good, actually, man. -Oh, no? Why? What's wrong?
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Look, I don't want to get into the whole thing,
whole
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but basically what happened was I bought some protein powder off the web,
bought
happened
powder
protein
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and, you know, at first it was great.
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It was awesome at first, but after a few weeks,
awesome
weeks
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I started to just kind of feel, like, bad.
started
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You know what I mean? And...
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Yeah, I went to urgent care this morning and it turns out I'm eating sand.
care
eating
morning
sand
turns
urgent
urgent-care
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-Sand? -Sand, yeah, like from the beach.
beach
sand
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So, it wasn't protein powder at all. I've been getting scammed the whole time.
powder
protein
scammed
whole
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So, no, I'm not doing too good.
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That's awful, Charlie. I'm sorry you ate sand.
awful
charlie
sand
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Thanks, man. Yeah, look, I think I definitely learned my lesson.
learned
lesson
thanks
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You know, I'm definitely not going to buy anything off--
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Hello.
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Hey, boys.
boys
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Guess what?
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-What? -You just got a job.
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Okay, we'll get on that. Yeah, okay, sure.
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Yeah.
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Cool. I'll...
cool
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I'll text you all the info.
info
text
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Sweet. Thanks.
sweet
thanks
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Come in.
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Stupid thing!
stupid
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Make my dinner faster! Get me a beer!
beer
dinner
faster
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Rub my back!
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Hello?
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Finally, it took you long enough.
finally
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I'm sad because this robot I bought off the web won't go faster.
bought
faster
robot
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It's lazy as fuck!
fuck
lazy
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Dude, it looks like it's going as fast as it can.
fast
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Yeah, I agree. I don't know how we can help here.
agree
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You can't even help me?
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Fuck you. I'm canceling the job then!
canceling
fuck
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Get out! Get the fuck out!
fuck
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All right, fine. Gladly. You suck, man. You suck.
gladly
suck
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I said get out!
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Another beer! TV on! More dinner!
another
another-beer
beer
dinner
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TV off! Another beer!
another
another-beer
beer
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Faster! Faster! Faster!
faster
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How terrible.
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Yeah, really sad. Hey, by the way, Pim, you wanna go bowling?
bowling
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Y'know, there's a new bowling place that just opened up,
bowling
opened
place
yknow
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and it's, like, the theme is, like, weird bowling pins,
bowling
pins
theme
weird
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and I thought that sounded funny.
funny
sounded
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-What about the robot? -Oh, yeah, that thing.
robot
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I am Friend-Bot Version 125892187318092135--
friend
version
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We'll just call you Friend-Bot. I think it's gonna be easier.
easier
friend
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-What were you made to do, Friend-Bot? -I can do anything you need.
friend
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I am implanted with a special golden chip
chip
golden
implanted
special
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that goes at one billion micronauts per second.
billion
second
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Really? Okay, okay, okay.
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Let's try something. Make a picture of...
picture
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Pim as...
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as a hot dog. Do that.
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Holy fuck, man! This is insane! How did you do that?
fuck
holy
holy-fuck
insane
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Dude, Pim, Pim, we gotta take this thing back to the office, man.
office
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Yeah, sure. Would you like to come back with us, Friend-Bot?
friend
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Whatever you want.
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One, zero, one, one, zero, zero, zero,
zero
zero-zero
zero-zero-zero
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one, zero, one, zero, one, zero, one, zero.
zero
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Allan, Allan, check this out.
allan
check
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-Hey, Friend-Bot. -Yes?
friend
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Tell Allan the greatest robot joke ever.
allan
greatest
joke
robot
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Two ones meet on the zero.
meet
ones
zero
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One of them says zero, one of them says one, and zero,
zero
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and one, and zero, zero, zero, one, zero, zero, zero, one, zero...
zero
zero-zero
zero-zero-zero
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-Did you even get that? -Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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-It's good. -Oh, yeah, he got it. He got it.
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I don't believe he got it. Can we find out?
believe
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Explain the joke, Charlie.
charlie
explain
joke
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Yeah, it's... it's two zeros meet and they...
meet
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No, it's two ones.
ones
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Yeah, well, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.
matter
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Allan, you... But, yeah, you should try. You should do something with it, man.
allan
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Have him do something.
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What would I need stupid jokes for?
jokes
stupid
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This thing can't do anything useful like my work.
useful
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Printing out Allan's work.
printing
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Wow, this is incredible.
incredible
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The robot did a year's worth of work in one seconds.
robot
seconds
worth
years
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Wow.
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What in the hell's going on in here?
hells
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-We have a robot that can do anything. -Anything?
robot
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I've got some ideas.
ideas
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Yeah, I kinda wanna make a picture of Allan as a hot dog.
allan
kinda
picture
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That's ridiculous. I would never be a hot dog.
ridiculous
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Besides, I want to use it to do my taxes now.
besides
taxes
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Smiling Friends are using a robot
friends
robot
smiling
smiling-friends
using
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They like to use a robot For many things they don't want to do
robot
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Robot's a form of a crutch
form
robots
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Smiling Friends are using robot
friends
robot
smiling
smiling-friends
using
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Charlie, Allan, Pim, Allan, Pim, Charlie
allan
charlie
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Friends, they connect to the--
connect
friends
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Wow, since that robot did all my work,
robot
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I've completed 100 paintings in my free time.
completed
free
paintings
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Yeah, and my stocks have been shooting through the roof thanks to the sex bot.
roof
shooting
stocks
thanks
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What?
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Good morning, everybody. Do we have any jobs today?
everybody
jobs
morning
morning-everybody
today
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Actually, Friend-Bot already did all the jobs for today.
friend
jobs
today
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And for tomorrow,
tomorrow
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and for the entire week, now that I think about it.
entire
week
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-What? Why? -Pim, it's a good thing.
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Relax and chill out, man. We don't need to work anymore.
anymore
chill
relax
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I'll be right back.
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I just had the most amazing idea.
amazing
idea
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It was Pim as a hot dog, plus Allan was also a hot dog,
allan
plus
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and... and had cinematic lighting and...
cinematic
lighting
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I'm sad.
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Have you ever considered one, zero, one, zero, one, zero, one, zero,
considered
zero
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one, zero, one, zero, one, zero?
zero
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Wow.
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No, I actually never thought about that before.
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I feel a lot better now. Thank you.
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-Excuse me, Mr. Friend-Bot? -Hello, Pim. What can I do for you?
excuse
friend
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I don't need anything. It's just...
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Look, I appreciate you helping with my job,
appreciate
helping
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but I'd rather if you didn't actually do it for me,
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because I love my job.
love
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But I can do it quicker and more efficiently than you.
quicker
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Yeah, but I...
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Pim, what if I told you that I could make everyone in the world smil?
world
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What?
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You could really make everyone in the world smil-- I mean smile?
smile
world
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Yes. Because I am constantly learning and improving myself,
constantly
improving
learning
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my capabilities grow every day.
capabilities
grow
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I am designed to do whatever you ask of me,
designed
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and if that is what you want, I will do it.
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But then, I would never be able to make anyone smile again.
able
smile
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But everyone else would be happy. Isn't that better?
happy
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It is your choice.
choice
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All you have to do is give me the command and it shall be done.
command
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Pim, relax and chill out, man. We don't need to work anymore.
anymore
chill
relax
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We don't need to work anymore.
anymore
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-Hello, Pim. -Hi, Friend-Bot.
friend
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I've made my choice.
choice
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Can you please make everyone in the world smile--
smile
world
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Hey, what are you doing, Pim? It's my turn to use the robot.
robot
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I need it to paint my paintings for me. I am sick of painting now.
paint
painting
paintings
sick
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Allan, please wait.
allan
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I need to use Friend-Bot for something important first.
friend
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Hey! Both of you get away from that! It's my robot, dammit! Get the fuck out!
dammit
fuck
robot
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Please, let me use it first,
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and then you guys can use it as much as you want after.
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I booked it for tonight on the calendar.
booked
calendar
tonight
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It's mine! I'm the one who brought it back to the office!
brought
office
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Guys, stop! We need to use the robot for good!
robot
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Sex-bot! Give me the Sex-bot! Give me the Sex-bot! Give me the Sex-bot!
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Give me the Sex-bot!
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Give it to me. Give it--
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Look at us. This isn't who we are. The robot sent us all mad.
robot
sent
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Yeah, look, I wanted to see those pictures so badly,
badly
pictures
wanted
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I got fat and went crazy.
crazy
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Yeah, guys, I'm sorry too.
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-Group hug? -Yeah, let's hug.
group
โ
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That's nice. I love you guys.
love
โ
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Sorry, I do just have one more idea for the robot.
idea
robot
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It was basically, what if Glep was a hot dog?
glep
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Wait, how did you do all the robot stuff then?
robot
stuff
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Fuck, man, I got scammed again, dude.
fuck
scammed
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Is there something wrong with my brain where I'm getting scammed this much?
brain
scammed
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You guys can tell me if there is. I want to know that kind of thing.
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I don't understand.
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Why'd you go through all that effort to pretend to be a robot?
effort
pretend
robot
whyd
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Dude, if that's really why you did what you did,
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I just have to say that's probably the single worst way...
single
worst
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the single worst way to make new friends.
friends
single
worst
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-Yeah, I think so. -Wait, I'm sorry, I'm just curious.
curious
โ
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Why do you think that? Did someone tell you that?
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Did you read that somewhere?
read
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Did you say Fakestuff.net?
โ
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-I wouldn't trust that. -Yeah, that doesn't seem good.
trust
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It just doesn't sound that credible to me.
credible
sound
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Well, I mean, it sounds like you got scammed yourself, man.
scammed
sounds
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I mean, yeah, you scammed us, but you also yourself got scammed.
scammed
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It's a vicious cycle.
cycle
vicious
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-Yeah, man, I think that's for the best. -Okay. Good luck to you.
best
luck
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Safe travels.
safe
travels
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-All right, bye. See you. -Later.
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โง
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Goodbye.
goodbye
โ
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Mr. Boss, are you okay?
boss
โ
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Oh, yeah, I knew that was a guy in a costume the entire time.
costume
entire
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I don't care about that.
care
โ
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โ
I'm looking at those paintings. Allan, you really did those? Wow.
allan
looking
paintings
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-Can I buy one off you? -Yes, you may.
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F yeah, man. I'll hit you up about that later.
โ
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Awesome.
awesome
โ
โง
โ
Oh, Charlie, you lost a lot of weight really fast.
charlie
fast
lost
weight
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-That was fast. -Yeah, isn't it awesome?
awesome
fast
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I got it chopped off and sent to starving children in need.
children
chopped
sent
starving
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โง
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Oh, Charlie, that was nice of you to do that.
charlie
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-That's so nice. -Yeah, I'm a good person, Pim.
person
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Like, a really good person. You didn't know that?
person
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You didn't know I did good stuff, like chop my fat off
chop
stuff
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and send it overseas to starving children?
children
overseas
send
starving
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I'm sorry, I thought you knew facts like that.
facts
โ
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I guess not. Okay, well.
โ
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Goblin caught on tape.
caught
goblin
tape
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