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Home » Airplane! » S01E01 — Airplane!

Airplane!

Season 1, Episode 1 — Airplane!

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- Here you go. - We'll be cruising
cruising
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- at 36,000 feet this evening. - Stewardess?
eveningfeetstewardess
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Our arrival time in Chicago will be 10:45 p.m. Central time.
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The temperature there is currently 62 degrees,
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with a 20% chance of precipitation.
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Meanwhile, relax and enjoy your flight.
enjoyflightmeanwhilerelax
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- Would you like something to read? - Do you have anything light?
lightread
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How about this leaflet, "Famous Jewish Sports Legends"?
famousjewishsports
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Yes. Thank you.
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- Ted! What are you doing here? - Elaine, I've got to talk to you.
elaine
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You shouldn't have come. I don't have time now.
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- Oh, stewardess? - Excuse me.
excusestewardess
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But...
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No wonder you're upset.
upsetwonder
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She's lovely.
lovely
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And a darling figure.
darlingfigure
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Supple, pouting breasts.
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Firm thighs.
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It's a shame you two don't get along.
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Yes, I know.
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Things used to be different.
used
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I remember when we first met.
remember
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It was during the war.
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I was in the Air Force,
force
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stationed in Drambuie off the Barbary Coast.
coaststationed
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I used to hang out at the Magumba Bar.
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It was a rough place, the seediest dive on the wharf,
diveplacerough
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populated with every reject and cutthroat
reject
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from Bombay to Calcutta.
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It was worse than Detroit.
detroitworse
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The mood in the place was downright ugly.
moodplaceugly
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You wouldn't walk in there unless you knew how to use your fists.
walk
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You could count on a fight breaking out almost every night.
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I didn't go there that night to fall in love. I just dropped in for a couple of drinks.
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But suddenly, there she was.
suddenly
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I was captivated, entranced. It hit me like a thunderbolt.
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I had to ask the guy next to me to pinch me
pinch
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to make sure I wasn't dreaming.
dreaming
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I was afraid to approach her. But that night, fate was on my side.
afraidapproachfatenightside
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We laughed. We talked.
laughedtalked
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We danced.
danced
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I never wanted it to end. Hell, I guess I still don't.
wanted
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But enough about me. I hope this hasn't been boring for you.
boringhope
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It's just that whenever I start to talk about Elaine,
elainestart
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I always get so carried away.
carried
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I lose all track of time.
losetrack
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Would you like to order dinner now?
dinnerorder
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Yes. Joey will have the steak, and my wife and I will have the fish.
fishjoeysteakwife