Home » Scrubs » S05E04 — My Jiggly Ball

Scrubs

Season 5, Episode 4 — My Jiggly Ball

I missed living with Turk,

#1

⇓

I missed living with Turk,

#2

⇓

but living with Elliot wasn't that bad.

#3

⇓

Hey, roomie. I'm having the girls from my yoga class over for drinks.

#4

⇓

Hey, roomie. I'm having the girls from my yoga class over for drinks.

#5

⇓

And FYI, Tina, the tiny brunette, just got dumped,

#6

⇓

And FYI, Tina, the tiny brunette, just got dumped,

#7

⇓

and she's looking for rebound sex.

#8

⇓

and she's looking for rebound sex.

#9

⇓

Honestly, how could I be a better roommate?

#10

⇓

She could be half Turk and half Elliot.

#11

⇓

She could be half Turk and half Elliot.

#12

⇓

Hey, dawg, if you die before me,

#13

⇓

Hey, dawg, if you die before me,

#14

⇓

you can play with my boobies while I finish.

#15

⇓

you can play with my boobies while I finish.

#16

⇓

I died, Turkiot. Hello!

#17

⇓

- J.D., what are you doing? - Nothing.

#18

⇓

- J.D., what are you doing? - Nothing.

#19

⇓

It looked like you were thinking about fondling my breasts.

#20

⇓

It looked like you were thinking about fondling my breasts.

#21

⇓

If that's the case, then stop thinking and start fondling.

#22

⇓

- What are you doing? - I miss having you as my roommate.

#23

⇓

- What are you doing? - I miss having you as my roommate.

#24

⇓

I don't know.

#25

⇓

Keith's telling Mr Morrison about his brain tumour.

#26

⇓

Keith's telling Mr Morrison about his brain tumour.

#27

⇓

Seeing an intern tell someone they're gonna die

#28

⇓

Seeing an intern tell someone they're gonna die

#29

⇓

for the first time is strange

#30

⇓

because even though it's a horrible and sad experience,

#31

⇓

because even though it's a horrible and sad experience,

#32

⇓

if they get through it, there's a sense of... accomplishment.

#33

⇓

if they get through it, there's a sense of... accomplishment.

#34

⇓

Nailed it! Hell, yeah!

#35

⇓

Nailed it! Hell, yeah!

#36

⇓

Good job, man. What'd you say?

#37

⇓

I told him there's nothing more we can do right now.

#38

⇓

I told him there's nothing more we can do right now.

#39

⇓

- What? - "Nothing more we can do now"

#40

⇓

- What? - "Nothing more we can do now"

#41

⇓

implies something we can do tomorrow.

#42

⇓

I said we'd make him as comfortable as possible.

#43

⇓

I said we'd make him as comfortable as possible.

#44

⇓

Someone's getting new pillows.

#45

⇓

Someone's getting new pillows.

#46

⇓

That man knows he's doomed!

#47

⇓

Yeah, I'm gonna need you to go back in there

#48

⇓

Yeah, I'm gonna need you to go back in there

#49

⇓

and use some form of the word "die."

#50

⇓

Dead, dying, deadsies, Deadwood, your choice.

#51

⇓

Dead, dying, deadsies, Deadwood, your choice.

#52

⇓

- What was the middle one? - Deadsies.

#53

⇓

- What was the middle one? - Deadsies.

#54

⇓

- Deadwood? - You know cowboys used to curse?

#55

⇓

- Deadwood? - You know cowboys used to curse?

#56

⇓

I didn't know that.

#57

⇓

Gather round, people! Dr Kelso has an announcement to make!

#58

⇓

Gather round, people! Dr Kelso has an announcement to make!

#59

⇓

That'll be all. You can go back to doing what you were doing.

#60

⇓

That'll be all. You can go back to doing what you were doing.

#61

⇓

It was my day off.

#62

⇓

Due to lack of funds, I'm shutting down our baby-mobile,

#63

⇓

Due to lack of funds, I'm shutting down our baby-mobile,

#64

⇓

which means there will no longer be free prenatal care

#65

⇓

for underprivileged women.

#66

⇓

for underprivileged women.

#67

⇓

Bottom line: Thinking about knocking up a homeless gal,

#68

⇓

Bottom line: Thinking about knocking up a homeless gal,

#69

⇓

I'd do it this weekend.

#70

⇓

- Thank you, Colonel Doctor. - Excuse me?

#71

⇓

- Thank you, Colonel Doctor. - Excuse me?

#72

⇓

I don't know your name, and you look like that Kentucky Fried Chicken guy.

#73

⇓

I don't know your name, and you look like that Kentucky Fried Chicken guy.

#74

⇓

Moving on. This Friday, I am receiving an award from the AMA.

#75

⇓

Moving on. This Friday, I am receiving an award from the AMA.

#76

⇓

Jerk-Off of the Year. No, Bastard of the Year. Don't you tell me!

#77

⇓

Jerk-Off of the Year. No, Bastard of the Year. Don't you tell me!

#78

⇓

Guy I Despise So Much, I'd Pay Someone to Kill Ya,

#79

⇓

Guy I Despise So Much, I'd Pay Someone to Kill Ya,

#80

⇓

Stuff Ya and Leave by My Bed, So When I Wake Up in the Morning,

#81

⇓

Stuff Ya and Leave by My Bed, So When I Wake Up in the Morning,

#82

⇓

I Could Roll Over and Punch You in the Face...

#83

⇓

I Could Roll Over and Punch You in the Face...

#84

⇓

...of the Year. - And we're back.

#85

⇓

...of the Year. - And we're back.

#86

⇓

Anyway, I need one of you attendings to introduce me at the dinner,

#87

⇓

so figure it out.

#88

⇓

so figure it out.

#89

⇓

- How do we handle this? - Same way we have for years.

#90

⇓

- How do we handle this? - Same way we have for years.

#91

⇓

First one who falls introduces Kelso.

#92

⇓

First one who falls introduces Kelso.

#93

⇓

Unfortunately for you, I have the balance of a...

#94

⇓

Careful. You're about to let Dr Cox know

#95

⇓

Careful. You're about to let Dr Cox know

#96

⇓

you were a gymnast in high school.

#97

⇓

Fine, let's do this. Wheels up.

#98

⇓

Fine, let's do this. Wheels up.

#99

⇓

OK, come on, Dorian. Find your centre.

#100

⇓

Around the rosie.

#101

⇓

Around the rosie.

#102

⇓

Hey! I got it!

#103

⇓

Hey! I got it!

#104

⇓

I don't got it!

#105

⇓

I don't got it!

#106

⇓

Reel it in. Take it clockwise! Fight your fear!

#107

⇓

Reel it in. Take it clockwise! Fight your fear!

#108

⇓

Come on, come on. Be the chair.

#109

⇓

Come on, come on. Be the chair.

#110

⇓

You gotta want it, Johnny D!

#111

⇓

You gotta want it, Johnny D!

#112

⇓

You gotta want it!

#113

⇓

Tough break, Newbie.

#114

⇓

Group! Position right!

#115

⇓

Group! Position right!

#116

⇓

- I don't know but I believe - I don't know but I believe

#117

⇓

- I don't know but I believe - I don't know but I believe

#118

⇓

Newbie...

#119

⇓

THEME SONG

#120

⇓

THEME SONG

#121

⇓

So I have to introduce Kelso. Big whoop.

#122

⇓

You don't understand the predicament you're in.

#123

⇓

You don't understand the predicament you're in.

#124

⇓

Kelso expects a long, glowing testimonial,

#125

⇓

Kelso expects a long, glowing testimonial,

#126

⇓

the kind that make men cheer and women...

#127

⇓

- What is it that women do? - How the hell would I know?

#128

⇓

- What is it that women do? - How the hell would I know?

#129

⇓

They swoon.

#130

⇓

If you get up there and start kissing Kelso's ass,

#131

⇓

If you get up there and start kissing Kelso's ass,

#132

⇓

your fellow attendings will think of you as a brownnosing toady.

#133

⇓

your fellow attendings will think of you as a brownnosing toady.

#134

⇓

On the other hand, if you don't pucker up,

#135

⇓

On the other hand, if you don't pucker up,

#136

⇓

Kelso will make your life a living hell. You're officially trapped.

#137

⇓

Kelso will make your life a living hell. You're officially trapped.

#138

⇓

I'll say something nice that's true.

#139

⇓

You go do that, and I'll go find God, quit drinking,

#140

⇓

You go do that, and I'll go find God, quit drinking,

#141

⇓

get in touch with myself,

#142

⇓

get in touch with myself,

#143

⇓

and we'll meet right back here at half past impossible. OK?

#144

⇓

and we'll meet right back here at half past impossible. OK?

#145

⇓

Everyone has a human side, Coxie. Even Kelso.

#146

⇓

The hell he does.

#147

⇓

The hell he does.

#148

⇓

I remember a flu epidemic, we lost half a dozen children in one day.

#149

⇓

I remember a flu epidemic, we lost half a dozen children in one day.

#150

⇓

The second Kelso's foot hits the bottom of those stairs...

#151

⇓

The second Kelso's foot hits the bottom of those stairs...

#152

⇓

...doesn't have a care in the world.

#153

⇓

You know, Laverne, I'm a doctor.

#154

⇓

You know, Laverne, I'm a doctor.

#155

⇓

I'm not gonna take my psychological evaluations

#156

⇓

from someone who dispenses them in between Maury

#157

⇓

from someone who dispenses them in between Maury

#158

⇓

and eating a corn muffin.

#159

⇓

and eating a corn muffin.

#160

⇓

OK, that was too mean. Apologise.

#161

⇓

Laverne, I...

#162

⇓

Laverne, I...

#163

⇓

The hell with it. She's not gonna forgive you. Go for broke!

#164

⇓

I was watching CNN earlier.

#165

⇓

I was watching CNN earlier.

#166

⇓

Apparently the terror alert in your armpits has been elevated to orange.

#167

⇓

Apparently the terror alert in your armpits has been elevated to orange.

#168

⇓

Oh, no, he didn't. Yes, Laverne, he did.

#169

⇓

Oh, no, he didn't. Yes, Laverne, he did.

#170

⇓

"Laverne, I'm a doctor." You're a bit of a know-it-all, aren't you?

#171

⇓

"Laverne, I'm a doctor." You're a bit of a know-it-all, aren't you?

#172

⇓

- Well, I know a lot. - Yeah? Who was Deep Throat?

#173

⇓

Mark Felt, the FBI guy. That's been all over the news.

#174

⇓

Mark Felt, the FBI guy. That's been all over the news.

#175

⇓

Oh, sorry, rich boy. My TV doesn't get the news.

#176

⇓

Oh, sorry, rich boy. My TV doesn't get the news.

#177

⇓

Just The Bible Channel and some kind of Chinese boxing.

#178

⇓

Just The Bible Channel and some kind of Chinese boxing.

#179

⇓

Bet you don't know how to play Jiggly Ball.

#180

⇓

Bet you don't know how to play Jiggly Ball.

#181

⇓

That's because there's no such thing.

#182

⇓

I knew you didn't know.

#183

⇓

I knew you didn't know.

#184

⇓

If I just follow Dr Kelso around for a while,

#185

⇓

If I just follow Dr Kelso around for a while,

#186

⇓

he'll do something decent.

#187

⇓

I'm a master of stealth, I can sneak up on anybody.

#188

⇓

I'm a master of stealth, I can sneak up on anybody.

#189

⇓

Why are you following me?

#190

⇓

Sir, aren't you being a little paranoid?

#191

⇓

Sir, aren't you being a little paranoid?

#192

⇓

I was in 'Nam. They pulled off my fingernails.

#193

⇓

When did you get an earring?

#194

⇓

When did you get an earring?

#195

⇓

Enid, I'm not cheating on you. This earring is mine.

#196

⇓

Enid, I'm not cheating on you. This earring is mine.

#197

⇓

See?

#198

⇓

It's a hip-hop world, son. Keep up or get out of the way.

#199

⇓

It's a hip-hop world, son. Keep up or get out of the way.

#200

⇓

I gotta get an earring.

#201

⇓

Turk, have you heard of Jiggly Ball?

#202

⇓

Turk, have you heard of Jiggly Ball?

#203

⇓

It's a game the orderlies made up.

#204

⇓

I've heard of it too. It's so awesome that we've both heard of it.

#205

⇓

I've heard of it too. It's so awesome that we've both heard of it.

#206

⇓

Yes. That... that's awesome.

#207

⇓

Yes. That... that's awesome.

#208

⇓

Mr Keck. What do you say we get you into surgery

#209

⇓

and take care of that hernia?

#210

⇓

and take care of that hernia?

#211

⇓

I don't know if surgery is necessary.

#212

⇓

I don't know if surgery is necessary.

#213

⇓

Last night I was in pain, so I went to a free clinic.

#214

⇓

The doctor there said surgery wasn't my only option.

#215

⇓

Tell him that I won't be second-opinioned

#216

⇓

Tell him that I won't be second-opinioned

#217

⇓

by a doctor who couldn't carry my jockstrap!

#218

⇓

by a doctor who couldn't carry my jockstrap!

#219

⇓

- Gimme some! - Here it is.

#220

⇓

I think I know this guy.

#221

⇓

I think I know this guy.

#222

⇓

A cocky black doctor with a white doctor following him

#223

⇓

looking at him like he's in love?

#224

⇓

looking at him like he's in love?

#225

⇓

- You would make a pretty girl. - Yeah.

#226

⇓

- You would make a pretty girl. - Yeah.

#227

⇓

All right, now repeat after me:

#228

⇓

"You can't decide for me, that's not your duty."

#229

⇓

"You can't decide for me, that's not your duty."

#230

⇓

Are they both trying not to laugh at the word "duty"?

#231

⇓

Are they both trying not to laugh at the word "duty"?

#232

⇓

Yeah. Hey, Heckle and Jeckle, you know what? No surgery.

#233

⇓

- Who the hell is this? - Where are my shoelaces?

#234

⇓

- Who the hell is this? - Where are my shoelaces?

#235

⇓

I said tell him he had a laxity in the peritoneal wall

#236

⇓

and that surgery was unnecessarily invasive. Was that so hard?

#237

⇓

and that surgery was unnecessarily invasive. Was that so hard?

#238

⇓

Mr Morrison, I understand that one of our interns spent an hour in here

#239

⇓

Mr Morrison, I understand that one of our interns spent an hour in here

#240

⇓

telling you over and over that you are going to die.

#241

⇓

telling you over and over that you are going to die.

#242

⇓

I would make him apologise personally,

#243

⇓

but I'm having him spend the day checking that countertop's heartbeat.

#244

⇓

but I'm having him spend the day checking that countertop's heartbeat.

#245

⇓

- Sorry, Mr Morrison. - Keith!

#246

⇓

I think Mr Countertop would really appreciate your undivided attention.

#247

⇓

I think Mr Countertop would really appreciate your undivided attention.

#248

⇓

Now, the hospital is running an experimental drug trial

#249

⇓

Now, the hospital is running an experimental drug trial

#250

⇓

on a medication that they hope will reduce the size of tumours.

#251

⇓

on a medication that they hope will reduce the size of tumours.

#252

⇓

And, well, I'm gonna try my hardest to get you in there.

#253

⇓

I really appreciate that, sir.

#254

⇓

I really appreciate that, sir.

#255

⇓

Checking Mr Countertop's heart rate.

#256

⇓

Checking Mr Countertop's heart rate.

#257

⇓

Memories. Do you know that, once,

#258

⇓

Memories. Do you know that, once,

#259

⇓

Dr Cox made me give every AC unit in this hospital a Pap smear?

#260

⇓

Dr Cox made me give every AC unit in this hospital a Pap smear?

#261

⇓

The wacky thing was room 403 did have some yeast issues.

#262

⇓

The wacky thing was room 403 did have some yeast issues.

#263

⇓

Look, Dr Cox, this intro is killing me. Have you seen Kelso?

#264

⇓

Look, Dr Cox, this intro is killing me. Have you seen Kelso?

#265

⇓

Nope. But our new patient, Mr Franks, in here is crazy rich,

#266

⇓

Nope. But our new patient, Mr Franks, in here is crazy rich,

#267

⇓

so I'd imagine Big Bob will be here momentarily

#268

⇓

so I'd imagine Big Bob will be here momentarily

#269

⇓

to make love to his money clip.

#270

⇓

Hi. Bob Kelso.

#271

⇓

Hi. Bob Kelso.

#272

⇓

Listen up, bozos.

#273

⇓

Listen up, bozos.

#274

⇓

That gentleman over there is basically a cash pinata

#275

⇓

waiting to be whacked open.

#276

⇓

waiting to be whacked open.

#277

⇓

So how about someone diagnoses him so I can get my candy?

#278

⇓

So how about someone diagnoses him so I can get my candy?

#279

⇓

I'll be glad to do it, Bob,

#280

⇓

if you'll do me a favour and put my patient, Mr Morrison,

#281

⇓

if you'll do me a favour and put my patient, Mr Morrison,

#282

⇓

- in that experimental drug trial. - Sure, what the hell.

#283

⇓

- in that experimental drug trial. - Sure, what the hell.

#284

⇓

Deal.

#285

⇓

Finally I had something I could say in my speech.

#286

⇓

Finally I had something I could say in my speech.

#287

⇓

Dr Kelso was an angel.

#288

⇓

Dr Kelso was an angel.

#289

⇓

Lorraine, the sooner you let me have a look at that rash,

#290

⇓

Lorraine, the sooner you let me have a look at that rash,

#291

⇓

the sooner we can get you back home.

#292

⇓

the sooner we can get you back home.

#293

⇓

I mean, back on the street, which is your home.

#294

⇓

Hey! "Home, street home," huh?

#295

⇓

I'm sorry, Lorraine, that was incredibly insensitive.

#296

⇓

I'm sorry, Lorraine, that was incredibly insensitive.

#297

⇓

Frick!

#298

⇓

So this is where germs are born.

#299

⇓

So this is where germs are born.

#300

⇓

I cannot believe you told these guys.

#301

⇓

She didn't. My patient told me that his clinic doctor

#302

⇓

She didn't. My patient told me that his clinic doctor

#303

⇓

was this blonde-haired woman who talked in such a high-pitched voice

#304

⇓

was this blonde-haired woman who talked in such a high-pitched voice

#305

⇓

when she was upset, her words became gibberish.

#306

⇓

when she was upset, her words became gibberish.

#307

⇓

I do not talk like that.

#308

⇓

I'm getting tired of you guys constantly saying...

#309

⇓

I'm getting tired of you guys constantly saying...

#310

⇓

Elliot, nobody but me can understand you.

#311

⇓

(GIBBERISH)

#312

⇓

(GIBBERISH)

#313

⇓

That's Turk, that's how he is.

#314

⇓

You knew she worked here? I can't believe you kept a secret.

#315

⇓

You knew she worked here? I can't believe you kept a secret.

#316

⇓

Remember your wedding, you sold me out to Turk?

#317

⇓

Remember your wedding, you sold me out to Turk?

#318

⇓

You showed up drunk at my shower screaming through tears

#319

⇓

You showed up drunk at my shower screaming through tears

#320

⇓

I'd never be as connected to him as you are.

#321

⇓

Turk knew I was joking.

#322

⇓

Turk knew I was joking.

#323

⇓

We're so emotionally connected.

#324

⇓

Nobody respects clinic doctors.

#325

⇓

Nobody respects clinic doctors.

#326

⇓

I think your hernia patient does.

#327

⇓

- I'm not upset about that. - It's obvious you are.

#328

⇓

- I'm not upset about that. - It's obvious you are.

#329

⇓

It's obvious to me, baby... Turk.

#330

⇓

It's obvious to me, baby... Turk.

#331

⇓

This isn't great, but it's not like I think about being yelled at by Dr Cox

#332

⇓

This isn't great, but it's not like I think about being yelled at by Dr Cox

#333

⇓

or playing Jiggly Ball.

#334

⇓

How do I not know about this game?

#335

⇓

How do I not know about this game?

#336

⇓

At this clinic, I practice medicine for people who really need me.

#337

⇓

At this clinic, I practice medicine for people who really need me.

#338

⇓

I mean, honestly, I feel like I belong here.

#339

⇓

Dr Cole got stabbed in the parking lot, and we're out of gauze.

#340

⇓

Dr Cole got stabbed in the parking lot, and we're out of gauze.

#341

⇓

- Is it cool if I take lunch? - This place is crushing my soul.

#342

⇓

- Is it cool if I take lunch? - This place is crushing my soul.

#343

⇓

Can you believe Elliot's working in a free clinic?

#344

⇓

Can you believe Elliot's working in a free clinic?

#345

⇓

- Who? - Dr Reid?

#346

⇓

I'm sorry, that's just not ringing a bell.

#347

⇓

She and J.D. Used to sleep together.

#348

⇓

She and J.D. Used to sleep together.

#349

⇓

- J.D? - That's not even funny.

#350

⇓

- J.D? - That's not even funny.

#351

⇓

Priscilla, I honestly, on my mother's grave,

#352

⇓

thought your real name was Carol.

#353

⇓

thought your real name was Carol.

#354

⇓

Whoa, whoa. You wanna hear a weird coincidence?

#355

⇓

Whoa, whoa. You wanna hear a weird coincidence?

#356

⇓

The pathology just came back on Dr Kelso's rich patient.

#357

⇓

He has the same brain tumour as your guy, Mr Morrison.

#358

⇓

He has the same brain tumour as your guy, Mr Morrison.

#359

⇓

I don't know why we were running,

#360

⇓

because I think we both knew that we couldn't change anything.

#361

⇓

because I think we both knew that we couldn't change anything.

#362

⇓

Given a choice between a rich guy and a poor guy,

#363

⇓

Given a choice between a rich guy and a poor guy,

#364

⇓

it was pretty obvious who Bob Kelso would put in the drug trial,

#365

⇓

it was pretty obvious who Bob Kelso would put in the drug trial,

#366

⇓

and who he'd leave behind.

#367

⇓

Another banner day at Sacred Heart.

#368

⇓

Another banner day at Sacred Heart.

#369

⇓

A best friend stuck in a crappy job...

#370

⇓

... a nice guy slowly dying without a fighting chance.

#371

⇓

... a nice guy slowly dying without a fighting chance.

#372

⇓

It's a wonder how anyone can walk out of this place

#373

⇓

It's a wonder how anyone can walk out of this place

#374

⇓

with a smile on their face.

#375

⇓

We have to help Elliot get her job back.

#376

⇓

There's no money to hire another attending.

#377

⇓

There's no money to hire another attending.

#378

⇓

Maybe, though. Dr Bailey was fired last night.

#379

⇓

Maybe, though. Dr Bailey was fired last night.

#380

⇓

Why?

#381

⇓

For this procedure, I'm going to have to numb you.

#382

⇓

For this procedure, I'm going to have to numb you.

#383

⇓

- You know, in Dr Bailey's defence... - No, no, no, no.

#384

⇓

- You know, in Dr Bailey's defence... - No, no, no, no.

#385

⇓

- There have been times... - No.

#386

⇓

So anyways, we figured if I offered to do the nursing schedules,

#387

⇓

So anyways, we figured if I offered to do the nursing schedules,

#388

⇓

and these guys volunteered to do shifts at the clinic,

#389

⇓

and these guys volunteered to do shifts at the clinic,

#390

⇓

- Kelso might give you your job back. - No, thanks.

#391

⇓

- Kelso might give you your job back. - No, thanks.

#392

⇓

Why?

#393

⇓

I can't do your paperwork, I am swamped!

#394

⇓

I got you your job back.

#395

⇓

I got you your job back.

#396

⇓

I am not giving you my last Tater Tot!

#397

⇓

I am not giving you my last Tater Tot!

#398

⇓

I got you your job back.

#399

⇓

I don't care if they're able to attach one person's limbs

#400

⇓

I don't care if they're able to attach one person's limbs

#401

⇓

onto another's body, I am not giving you my hands!

#402

⇓

onto another's body, I am not giving you my hands!

#403

⇓

Job back!

#404

⇓

Just a beautiful film. Beautiful.

#405

⇓

Just a beautiful film. Beautiful.

#406

⇓

Corn?

#407

⇓

Oh, let me help you. Let me... I got you. Here you go.

#408

⇓

Oh, let me help you. Let me... I got you. Here you go.

#409

⇓

You're tickling your hands. Stop! You're tickling your hands.

#410

⇓

You're tickling your hands. Stop! You're tickling your hands.

#411

⇓

- Buttery. - OK, keep going.

#412

⇓

- Buttery. - OK, keep going.

#413

⇓

I enjoy it, actually.

#414

⇓

Two and a half years away from chest hands.

#415

⇓

Two and a half years away from chest hands.

#416

⇓

I have to handle this on my own, OK?

#417

⇓

See? These are chest hands.

#418

⇓

- That's what I'm talkin' about. - 'Course, yours would be brown.

#419

⇓

- That's what I'm talkin' about. - 'Course, yours would be brown.

#420

⇓

The next day started poorly.

#421

⇓

I had eight hours until Kelso's awards dinner,

#422

⇓

I had eight hours until Kelso's awards dinner,

#423

⇓

and someone was boxing me out.

#424

⇓

Hey, Bob, I need to talk to you about my drug trial patient.

#425

⇓

Hey, Bob, I need to talk to you about my drug trial patient.

#426

⇓

We lost him, Newbie.

#427

⇓

Bob? I can see you.

#428

⇓

Bob? I can see you.

#429

⇓

For God's sake, you're three-dimensional.

#430

⇓

It's true, Mr Keck, you could probably get by without the surgery.

#431

⇓

It's true, Mr Keck, you could probably get by without the surgery.

#432

⇓

But why would you? I'm the smartest, most skilled surgeon in this place.

#433

⇓

But why would you? I'm the smartest, most skilled surgeon in this place.

#434

⇓

You stuck in that candy machine?

#435

⇓

I paid for my Rolos, I'm getting my Rolos.

#436

⇓

I paid for my Rolos, I'm getting my Rolos.

#437

⇓

Nice! Why aren't you mocking him?

#438

⇓

I dropped a quarter in here.

#439

⇓

Guys, listen, we really need to help Elliot.

#440

⇓

Guys, listen, we really need to help Elliot.

#441

⇓

She doesn't want help.

#442

⇓

If J.D. Were drowning and said he didn't want you to save him,

#443

⇓

If J.D. Were drowning and said he didn't want you to save him,

#444

⇓

- wouldn't you? - Depends.

#445

⇓

- wouldn't you? - Depends.

#446

⇓

What if there're hot chicks?

#447

⇓

Maybe he wants one of them to save him.

#448

⇓

Maybe he wants one of them to save him.

#449

⇓

- Say there's no women. - There's always women at the pool!

#450

⇓

- He's in a pond. - I would never swim in a pond.

#451

⇓

- They're infamous for serpents. - You could swim at the Y,

#452

⇓

- They're infamous for serpents. - You could swim at the Y,

#453

⇓

- men only. - Have you been on man night?

#454

⇓

- men only. - Have you been on man night?

#455

⇓

- Not me. - Fine!

#456

⇓

- Turk's the one who's drowning! - So now a brother can't swim.

#457

⇓

- Turk's the one who's drowning! - So now a brother can't swim.

#458

⇓

- Why do you have to go there? - Oh, my God!

#459

⇓

I would rather play Jiggly Ball than try to explain this

#460

⇓

I would rather play Jiggly Ball than try to explain this

#461

⇓

to you two idiots.

#462

⇓

She's the idiot. We're doctors.

#463

⇓

She's the idiot. We're doctors.

#464

⇓

Bob, I'm physically touching your arm now.

#465

⇓

Bob, I'm physically touching your arm now.

#466

⇓

Oh, come on, I know you're here.

#467

⇓

Oh, come on, I know you're here.

#468

⇓

Oh, hi, Perry! What can I do for you?

#469

⇓

Oh, hi, Perry! What can I do for you?

#470

⇓

I just wanted to introduce you to our chief of medicine.

#471

⇓

I just wanted to introduce you to our chief of medicine.

#472

⇓

Sir, I can't tell you how well everyone's treating me.

#473

⇓

Sir, I can't tell you how well everyone's treating me.

#474

⇓

That's what we're here for.

#475

⇓

You forgot to tell him you were bumping him from the trial.

#476

⇓

You forgot to tell him you were bumping him from the trial.

#477

⇓

- I've got work to do, Perry. - You're not going anywhere.

#478

⇓

- I've got work to do, Perry. - You're not going anywhere.

#479

⇓

(METALLIC POUNDING)

#480

⇓

(METALLIC POUNDING)

#481

⇓

You hearin' that?

#482

⇓

You hearin' that?

#483

⇓

(METALLIC POUNDING)

#484

⇓

What kinda glass is this?

#485

⇓

What kinda glass is this?

#486

⇓

There was one spot open in the study.

#487

⇓

I gave it to the rich guy because with the money he's donating,

#488

⇓

I gave it to the rich guy because with the money he's donating,

#489

⇓

I can reopen the prenatal unit.

#490

⇓

I can reopen the prenatal unit.

#491

⇓

What really bothers me is that you can look in there at John Morrison,

#492

⇓

What really bothers me is that you can look in there at John Morrison,

#493

⇓

a guy you essentially gave a death sentence to...

#494

⇓

a guy you essentially gave a death sentence to...

#495

⇓

...and just not care.

#496

⇓

It's not my job to care, Perry.

#497

⇓

It's not my job to care, Perry.

#498

⇓

- Can I talk to you for a second? - No. I'm busy cleaning.

#499

⇓

That one always kills.

#500

⇓

That one always kills.

#501

⇓

Remember when I told you I'd never heard of Jiggly Ball?

#502

⇓

Remember when I told you I'd never heard of Jiggly Ball?

#503

⇓

I was joking. I play it all the time.

#504

⇓

I like this. It's an idiot handle.

#505

⇓

I like this. It's an idiot handle.

#506

⇓

Get off.

#507

⇓

Get off.

#508

⇓

We're heading out now to play some Jiggly Ball.

#509

⇓

- Are you in? - Just say no.

#510

⇓

- Are you in? - Just say no.

#511

⇓

Jiggle me in.

#512

⇓

Jiggle me in.

#513

⇓

You're gonna go first. Please enter the jiggly circle.

#514

⇓

You're gonna go first. Please enter the jiggly circle.

#515

⇓

Everybody else, on my signal, prepare to throw.

#516

⇓

Everybody else, on my signal, prepare to throw.

#517

⇓

- Throw? - Now.

#518

⇓

Now, anyone who caught a jiggle rebound

#519

⇓

Now, anyone who caught a jiggle rebound

#520

⇓

may step up to the death line.

#521

⇓

I want you to think of this as a corn muffin.

#522

⇓

I want you to think of this as a corn muffin.

#523

⇓

There is no such thing as Jiggly Ball, is there?

#524

⇓

There is no such thing as Jiggly Ball, is there?

#525

⇓

No.

#526

⇓

No.

#527

⇓

- Good. - Guys, why?

#528

⇓

Janitor said if we pretend to know Jiggly Ball,

#529

⇓

Janitor said if we pretend to know Jiggly Ball,

#530

⇓

- we can throw balls at you. - Couldn't pass it up!

#531

⇓

- we can throw balls at you. - Couldn't pass it up!

#532

⇓

Got my shift covered!

#533

⇓

I could see where it would be funny from the outside the circle.

#534

⇓

Hey, Kelso's leaving for his award thing,

#535

⇓

so if you want to talk to him about Dr Reid, do it now.

#536

⇓

so if you want to talk to him about Dr Reid, do it now.

#537

⇓

- I told you guys to leave it alone. - Would you stop being so proud?

#538

⇓

- I told you guys to leave it alone. - Would you stop being so proud?

#539

⇓

I'm proud? After the wedding, you wouldn't take Turk's name!

#540

⇓

I'm proud? After the wedding, you wouldn't take Turk's name!

#541

⇓

I use it for official things.

#542

⇓

I use it for official things.

#543

⇓

Calling you Mrs Turk in the bedroom isn't official.

#544

⇓

But it is officially hot!

#545

⇓

But it is officially hot!

#546

⇓

You freaked when the patient listened to me over you.

#547

⇓

You freaked when the patient listened to me over you.

#548

⇓

J.D., you let the hospital pummel you with balls

#549

⇓

because you were too proud to admit you didn't know Jiggly Ball.

#550

⇓

because you were too proud to admit you didn't know Jiggly Ball.

#551

⇓

I think there may be something wrong with my spine,

#552

⇓

I think there may be something wrong with my spine,

#553

⇓

because I'm not doing that.

#554

⇓

Elliot, look, we just care about you.

#555

⇓

Elliot, look, we just care about you.

#556

⇓

Yeah, well, don't worry about it. I'll get back on top on my own.

#557

⇓

Yeah, well, don't worry about it. I'll get back on top on my own.

#558

⇓

Chop-chop, Dorian.

#559

⇓

Chop-chop, Dorian.

#560

⇓

Even though I had no clue what I was gonna say,

#561

⇓

Elliot's attitude inspired me to go introduce the hell out of Bob Kelso.

#562

⇓

Elliot's attitude inspired me to go introduce the hell out of Bob Kelso.

#563

⇓

Elliot's attitude inspired me to go introduce the hell out of Bob Kelso.

#564

⇓

Ladies and gentlemen, Dr Bob Kelso is a...

#565

⇓

Thank you, Dr Dorian.

#566

⇓

Thank you, Dr Dorian.

#567

⇓

Thank you so much for this award.

#568

⇓

Thank you so much for this award.

#569

⇓

Delighted to see you all...

#570

⇓

Did I say he wanted a long introduction?

#571

⇓

Did I say he wanted a long introduction?

#572

⇓

Because Kelso just... he just likes when people say his name.

#573

⇓

Because Kelso just... he just likes when people say his name.

#574

⇓

Hope you didn't obsess too much about that, Newbie.

#575

⇓

Hope you didn't obsess too much about that, Newbie.

#576

⇓

Over the next few weeks, I couldn't help thinking

#577

⇓

Over the next few weeks, I couldn't help thinking

#578

⇓

about what I had planned to say in my speech.

#579

⇓

About how pride defines who we are.

#580

⇓

About how pride defines who we are.

#581

⇓

This guy has an STD,

#582

⇓

This guy has an STD,

#583

⇓

and he definitely doesn't want his wife to find out.

#584

⇓

Crap.

#585

⇓

Crap.

#586

⇓

As far as Bob Kelso goes,

#587

⇓

I know sometimes even the good things he does are for the wrong reasons.

#588

⇓

I know sometimes even the good things he does are for the wrong reasons.

#589

⇓

I'd like everyone to welcome back Dr Reid.

#590

⇓

I'd like everyone to welcome back Dr Reid.

#591

⇓

I also know that I wouldn't want to have to make any of the decisions

#592

⇓

I also know that I wouldn't want to have to make any of the decisions

#593

⇓

that he makes.

#594

⇓

But when all is said and done,

#595

⇓

I'd like to think he does care a little...

#596

⇓

..even if he's too proud to show it.

#597

⇓

Captions edited by Ai-Media ai-media.tv

#598

⇓